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TACKLING THE KITCHEN OF A HOARDER! Episode 2
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- Опубліковано 6 лип 2024
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/ @fernibops
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EPISODE 2!
We are thrilled to have purchased an apartment in our favourite city on the French Riviera, Cannes! 🤩 However, this property came with an unexpected challenge: the previous owner is still here! As it turns out, he’s a severe hoarder living in uninhabitable conditions.
Having previously visited and packed boxes bit by bit, it’s now time to tackle the kitchen. This room is in a horrifying state, filled with countless empty jars, bottles, dirt, and grime. Join us as we endeavour to help a hoarder and finally reclaim our property.
Watch our journey as we take on this daunting task!
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Hoarding like this is usually a result of trauma and grief perhaps PTSD. I hope he receives the professional help he needs 💔 Your compassionate approach and firmness will help him from withdrawing even more It must be so overwhelming for all of you. You’re doing a great job❤ Hugs ❤
Honestly there are so many things that I could say, but what it all really boils down to is that my heart is going out to this man. He has clearly been living a life of complete hell and devastating loneliness for a very long time. Thank you so much, on behalf of humanity, for the human decency, understanding, compassion, dignity and love that you both have treated him with. Having you and Ryan be the people who bought his house will have been a blessing. You're honestly like two angels -he really needed people like you to show up. I understand and can see how tough this was for the both of you at times, but I can only hope like you Fern, that this is the start of a new, better life for him too. ❤
Your compassion and concern for a man who clearly has some mental health issues and distress at leaving his home..is commendable ….it costs nothing to be kind and goes a long way…..well done guys for being so kind, compassionate and willing to dedicate some time to help him prepare to move out of a house ( that is now yours) that he has called home for many years…how difficult for him …it’s so sad…good on you both …..😘
Oh Fern I can't imagine how stressful this must be for you. You are so kind and compassionate. Can you imagine him taking all those infested things to a new home? Wishing you the best.
God lord how has he been keeping himself clean and feeding himself. Well done to you both for being respectful, kind and patient with him. I hope he can move on and live a better life. Can’t wait for your next episode ❤
Fern ,you and Ryan are the kindest people I have seen in years. I know you will have a fabulous house once he is out and you have it just the way you want. Your dream house will come to be and you can look back at the video and jrelive the tenderness you showed this poor soul.
My heart breaks for this man who obviously has mental illness. I hope he gets the help he needs as I do not know what the social services are in France. I hope this doesn’t taint your enthusiasm for your new home but know you handled it bravely and compassionately. Thank you.
Oh my goodness me, the depth of your kindness and respect to help this individual is remarkable! Our Journeys in Life put people and places in our Paths! There is a plan blessings to you both and this man given Dignity
Absolutely beautiful ❤
Fern and Ryan, God Bless you both for being so kind and compassionate...He is so very lucky that it was the two of you that has purchased this property...you both bring goodness to humanity!
All l can say is OMG ,And how very sad it is for him to live like that with no family . My heart goes out to him.
He’s so lucky you guys are in his life, how sad.❤
I must say that you two are exceptionally nice and kind people, not many people would have been so tolerant with this man.
I think it's a blessing that the man speaks and understands English as this situation could have been much worse through lack of communication.
You have such a good heart the world needs more people like you ❤
All his symptoms are trauma responses. So glad you are helping him. ❤ Thank you. You have shown yourselves to be truly beautiful compassionate people in your care and understanding of him.
Jesus I feel so bad for you guys. Hasn’t lifted a finger in 3 months. That kitchen was something else. Fern you were so nice to him; I don’t know if I could be. This would not fly in the US. Best of luck to you guys. ❤️
It’s the English way for the majority anyway , not a choice but who you are , I love it, warms my northern English heart , all the way from Australia , good on you guys.
I am bawling like a baby. Just so sad for him. However, he is lucky that you guys are taking the time to work with him. Prayers that the experience is successful for you and him.
You do not know HOW MUCH I APPRECIATE your KINDESS and COMPASSION for this gentleman. ACCOLADES 🥰🥰🥰👩❤👩👩❤👩👩❤👩
Hi Fern & Ryan, In America there’s a television show about hoarders. It shows how the hoarders need professional intervention to help them change. I have a feeling that poor man will leave kicking & screaming. I hope he gets the help he needs, hopefully he has family to support him. You’ll definitely have some good before & after photos of the house! I’m so excited for you! 🤗
So sad he dont have family to help him.I am glad your the ones to help him. Thank you for sharing😍
You are saving his life really. A small studio would be best for him with a weekly cleaning lady who does grocery shopping. If he can handle that. He may have to do a nursing home… He is one blessed man to have you Fern. Thank you ❤️
My sister has ocd, you handled him well, but he needs medical care , if you can get someone to see him , it will help in his future, he needs to overcome his ocd thoughts which can be so powerful he needs medication and cognitive therapy to help, god bless you for your support to him, 3 months and he did nothing, because he physically couldn’t his train of thought is blocked by ocd thoughts so strong he couldn’t help himself
You (and Ryan) are very kind. This must be especially frustrating for you, being that you are extremely organized yourself. Thank you for keeping it real, and showing that life is not always pretty, or perfect. I almost wish he could see one of the videos, like when you remodeled your dressing room, at the house. Or Ryan's trimming the garden. That change is good and so nice, the end result is. Hang in there! ❤️ From San Diego!
I’m living for this! I can’t wait to see what you do with this place. I’m hoping you retain the character and charm buried underneath the years of hoarding. I do feel bad for this guy and it’s great that you’re helping him the way you are.
I am so glad that you two are looking after this delicate soul, it was both heart-breaking and heartening to see. It reminded me of when my adult kids have come to stay and then in a flash they are gone, I look around the room at what remains afterwards, when I am alone, and I almost don't want to clear up to keep the memory for as long as possible. I feel like his 'stuff' is like emotionally charged photos. Could you line some boxes with black bags and put like for like in them - bottles, whatever and use the coaxing words of 'let's/we can put these outside' - that way he doesn't have to make a decision (which may panic him) and it is collaborative like his 'treasures' are being valued. That way he can visually see them and may be easier to process...This is why the property was meant for you two because you can handle it with 'heart' - thank you for looking after his mental health, just brilliant and valuable!
Bless your heart. You have been way more patient and kind than I’m sure I would have been.
Oh my gosh! Truly heartbreaking & so kind of you both to let him stay after your purchased the property, I don't think I could have done that! Where is this elderly man planning to live, does he have a place? Can't wait to see the renovation begin! Best of luck to you both! ❤
That was stressful to watch, I feel sorry for anyone who is in that situation of hoarding and for the ones like yourselves that have to help move things, you certainly have taken on a task 😮 but looking ahead I’m sure it will be worth it and can not wait to see the end result 😂 a massive before and after transformation awaits us .❤😊 xxx
Oh my. What a mess. I do hope you have no more problems with this man. Wishing you best and hoping no more problems with this house. Awfully nice of you both to help him out
Fern and Ryan, it's a difficult situation, I feel for you. I have just moved back to into my home in France after it being locked and left for 6 years. The smell when I opened the door I will never forget, she had suffered major water damage while I was away. After 17 days with cleaning and ventilation, I am finally starting to feel my spirits lift and I do a little project every day. As we say in Australia, do something and I can see that it is making a difference already. Everyone is this situation is traumatised, I know that I could not have gone into that kitchen, it would have just overwhelmed me and the bugs would have creeped me out and I honestly applaud you for sticking with it and helping the gentlemen. Have you thought of contacting the local council and see if their social services could also assist this gentlemen to rehouse him in a humane way. Best of luck with your endeavour's on this journey and I look forward to your next vlog. Take a breath and have a very welcome shower cheers from Brittany 🙂❤
This was so difficult to watch. Thank you for helping him. You are both kind, compassionate, and helpful to this person who obviously needs psychological help. You did not have to do this, but this proves to me that there are still some good human beings out there. Much love to both of you❤
You guys are so patient and kind. There is definitely some mental issue going on with him. Blessings to you ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤ I caNNOT WAIT TO SEE THE TRANSFORMATION
Wow!! You are both so lovely (and brave) to help clean out this place. It’s sad he doesn’t have family to help. Best of luck. I know it will be all worth it when you are in your beautiful new home. ❤
What a situation to find yourself in. Very difficult but at the end of the day, he's a human being and deserves the respect you've shown to him. Where's he going to live? And will he once building work starts or try to hang on. Very difficult.
Oh wow! This is not easy to handle but you guys are doing it well. In the end he will be out and hopefully start getting on better. You guys I know for sure are going to make this property a gorgeous home for your family. 3 Cheers to you Weston Bennett family. The hard work will payoff big time.
Omg this made me feel so stressed. If you could just go in and clear it out I’ve no doubt you would get it done ready for the renovations but when you are trying to help someone with what is a mental illness it’s very difficult. It usually stems from an incident in their life which from what you have said is probably the death of his mother. Credit to you that you are helping this man but it is a difficult situation. When the man and his stuff are gone I know both of you will get stuck in and turn this into a lovely home and I can’t wait for that but at the moment it’s a difficult watch ❤
You are both kind , lovely people. Words fail me at this sad situation you are tackling. Fern you said nothing good comes easy, how true this is for you both.
Wishing you both a good outcome for you both and this sad man .x
Fern you and Ryan are so patient, kind but firm. We are an Australian couple who have an apartment in Dijon, which we visit twice a hear. We have noticed how socially aware and kind French people ( and you 2) are to the homeless and people in distress. People make meals and deliver them around Dijon. Boulangerie ‘s provide free croissants and coffee to these people.
Bless you for being kind❤
Oh gosh this is so sad. You are both wonderful treating this with compassion and respect. Sending much love to you xx
I am so happy about your getting the house and know in the end it will work out. However, I have no idea how you can stand to be there cleaning. What a mess! This man needs mental health support in a serious way. Good luck and prayers to all.
Fern, Ryan - thank you honestly💜 you are such selfless, kind people, he's obviously in pain and mentally not well, probably broken by his mother passing, all the things probably remind him of the time when she was alive, so he's holding onto everything cause it's just too much for him to let go.. he needs professional help for sure and I hope he'll get it.. you are going above and beyond caring for someone you don't know simply because you can see he's not well - amazing role models for your kids💜
You are both truly compassionate human beings. What you are doing is so selfless ❤
Fern! God Bless you & Ryan. That was difficult to watch. The darker side of life for sure. I hope this man has access to some mental health services. It is very sad.
Wow!Fern & Ryan this is a sad situation..You are such a good people to try to help him . This is tricky. You must be firm. Firm is kind. It's a quantum leap, once he sees the change, hopefully. It is an visual nightmare. This is an emotional experience. Mind blowing squalor! I love the fast forward segment. Your showers must have felt so good.!
Keep up the good work, y'all. Elderly hoarding can turn into dementia. The difference is that in dementia case like my stepmom, she couldn't follow through any logic or process after starting it. My husband and I have cleaned out three of such properties in our family. There is one more to go in the next few years, unfortunately. (Our uncle has been hoarding all his life. His late wife kept it at bay. She passed away a couple of years ago. We see the current condition and tried to help just to find him rummaging through the trash bin to get the empty boxes back. We just try to keep the main areas clean for now and focus more on keeping him active at his church and outdoor gardening. At least, we know that his mental stage is alright. He's just habitually lacking on how to prioritize what is no longer needed. We were told that post-war generation typically has this kind of emotional baggage anyway.)
Very interesting. Thank you for sharing ❤️
Were you not aware of the situation at the time of purchasing the property that it was occupied , obviously the person has some rights to be there whether it be legitimate or otherwise, I can't believe 3 months has passed and you haven't approached the local Mairie/CCAS/SECU for advice and assistance with the situation , surely the person is registered with an official organisation somewhere ......
Wow bless you both x
You are just so kind and understanding xx 😘
Where is he moving too ?
What a brave decision for him to decide to move he must be wanting to help himself by deciding to move x
But I know you are going to make that place look amazing x
So excited for you all x
The kids are going to love it too 😘
I hope this all works out for your family and the gentleman but I’m thinking you may need professional help getting him removed from the property . Good luck starting work on Wednesday. Working with him making decisions about what to keep and what to throw away looks like it is going to take weeks not days. I’m hoping he doesn’t become more agitated as time goes on and cause problems. Where is he going? Wow! What an undertaking . Take care.❤️❤️
I wouldn't put this online. I get your situation but this could be used against you in court. According to French law he can stay living there. Especially if he is elderly. There is no protection for property owners. I refrained from buying occupied property for that reason. You can only legally forced him to move out, if you also elderly or in worse financially situation than him - in that situation court checks your income.
Oh Fern... you guys are being so patient with this poor man. Much respect to you & Ryan. I couldn't handle getting in there & going through the trash. I feel like I need a shower just after watching this episode!! I am sure all your hard work will pay off. I hope the man can get help & get his life together. Hard situation.
Hi Fern , just want to say this ....I hope this video reaches so many people out there infact it deserves an award ..... (I can't stop crying ) Your kindness speaks volumes towards this gent you & Ryan are truly two incredible individuals you have shown so much love respect & understanding allowing him time & working alongside him getting him to help in some way , I'm sure it has been very tuff going at times it's your new home & you want to get things started on it .... I hope pretty soon he is settled in his new home God love him ....this video is very powerful it is a lesson to all of us to be more ....and as Ryan said " in a humane way" Thank You both God Bless Always ❤🇨🇦❤
Bless you guys for being so kind and helpful in such a difficult sad situation that you have stumbled across - I suspect he is also just lonely and needing a hand to get motivated and sorted out xxx🙏💕
You are both such good people, your being so mindful. This property is legally yours and you can't be charitable for ever. Good look with Wednesday and the process of him moving out. Do you now have all the keys to the property? Lots of love to you both. ❤
Gosh you are both so kind and understanding and have so much patience. Not many would be able to handle this. Cannot wait to follow the journey! X
Fern and Ryan! You are Angels 😇💕!! It will be beautiful!!
Oh Fern as watching all I could do is shake my head. I feel for all of you. Poor man he must have had some trauma in his life to have caused the hoarding. Hope he gets help and good luck on renovation
Oh my.. you are being very nice to this guy and hopefully he is now living somewhere else. Can’t wait to see the renovations and for the finished product!
How long is he going to stay in the house? You two are so patient and kind, I give you a lot of credit for taking on this huge responsibility and the way you are caring about the poor man that is stuck in this situation.
can't wait to see the home in one year from now🌷
Thank you for your kindness. In a world where living sincerely and empathetically appears to be non-existent; we have the both of you. Wishing you blessings and support on this journey - you can never be wrong or criticized for doing what your heart has told you to do. Continue to shine your light💕
You two are the best!
Fern you and Ryan are so amazing for your compassionand grace. Good karma will come back to you ❤
You have such a huge hearts, I can't imagine the stress this has caused!
Poor man,he's been through a lot xx it's good of you to be so kind x
God bless you Fern and Ryan for helping that poor man.
You’re so caring ❤
Omg this is awful. I feel so sad for this poor nan. But also for you and Ryan such a hard situation to be in you need take care of your life while trying to be kind to someone else that clearly needs help. My heart goes out to you. Hopefully posting this someone will know him maybe and come to help. Yikes ❤
Maybe Diogene syndrome. You may find it helpful to contact the town hall as a starting point, then social services for advice and a hand of steps that can be taken to help in a humanistic way. His stress levels must be high too. On a legal and administrative level, the situation is not ideal for either party. From an insurance point of view certain situations could be more than awkward too. Also, when you consider that cognitively, the poor guy is facing the added difficulty of this being in English. The social services seriously can help you out here. ;-)
Oh god bless him that was so stressful for him his whole life gone but you both helped him loads well done x
I do understand your concern for the man, but…..
You’re both Too Nice…. It’s your house…
Bags on my feet in my house? 😏 NO! 🤨
There comes a point, in which this becomes ridiculous.
He will push you and control you as long as you let him.
“Passively Aggressive”
Are there Squatters Rights in France?
A call to your solicitor maybe important at this time.
Just to see if his living there, gives him any property rights. 😉
Omg what a job you have a head of you x
Your patience is amazing. He should have vacated the day he signed over ownership at the notaire office
Wow Fern- make sure you get some sort of spray onto those Silverfish. They will get into everything if you don't. You are braver than me tackling that putrid mess. I was dry heaving just watching the video and I would have had to wear a mask. You achieved a huge amount in two hours. Both you and Ryan have been very kind to him. Does he actually have somewhere to go? I hope so but if he hasn't packed up in 3 months I am worried he has not organized alternative accommodation.
OMG I'm itching just watching you clean. He needs to leave hevis basically squatting there illegally. Good luck on Wednesday. Can't wait for the next episode. You certainly have your work cut out. You are both very good and kind people ❤
I second everything everyone has said, you are both amazing and lets hope he gets some professional help!
how was he still there thats outrageous .....babes your so kind . Deep breath - you wil prevail...so sorry for ye both
This is France not the USA. There are risks, if you buy inhabited property. The law is not on the side of the property owner. (I owned in France before and I talk from my personal experience)
I live in Marseille, you have children, a family.... French law is so different....especially when it comes to the rights of tenants, eviction of owner/occupiers!
All fruit fails the next step will be the ballifs/huissiers?
Enjoy your channel immensely, good luck
OK, I feel like I’m in the darkness here last weekend. You told us you had purchased this home and you left us with where you had the camera at the door and the person open the door and you ended it and now you started this week with the kitchen, could you explain more about why it’s being soldand the circumstances of what’s going on? I’m totally confused. Who is this gentleman? Does he own the property and there was a mortgage on it or what’s going on? Please explain
Sorry if I’ve missed lots out. It’s been extremely difficult to keep on top of content whilst having our hands so full.
He is the old owner. The property was forced into auction due to years of various debts and not following rules. He doesn’t accept help and won’t face reality unfortunately 😔
@@fernibops good luck with everything I’ll be watching an anticipation. It’s maybe it’s good too that you’re filming all this just in case there may be a problem down the line, but I’m hoping and praying everything will work out. Well you guys have been so kind with him.
Fern I don't get it don't you buy with vacant possession in france! I know you want to help him but it's not your job can't the estate agents help you?. You are such nice people helping this poor man x
Your kindness is not being appreciated ! I would have had him gone in 3 weeks!
well you are very kind and considerate.
wel will be cheering you on from the sidelines. lots of content for us.
You are very, very kind. But please do read the warnings about letting him stay there and then being legally unable to remove him at a later date.
You two deserve the beautiful life you have because your soooooo good! God bless you😊❤xoxo
I really hope this gentleman got access to care as now he is also homeless after having suffered enormous loss. Ugh can’t watch this. He is really at risk having found himself in this situation. I’m shocked they bought this place from under this poor man.
Good Luck Folks ❤
God bless you guys for handling this situation the way that you are. How will you get him to
Leave? And where will he go? You have your hands full but I know that this property will be beautiful when you finish. Good luck & wishing you a steady journey 👏💙
You guys are so brave!!! ❤
I wish both Ryan and Fern were wearing masks. I guess it is hard to communicate with the masks and long pants for both would be reassuring and perhaps a change of clothes as to not contiminate their car. They are going to do wonders with the property when restoration begins. They are nice enough to even work so generously with this poor person. I don't know if they can see the light in the tunnel but they sure are working hard.
It's sad to see someone who had a life and then they get taken over with such a difficult condition. My Mom was a bit of a hoarder but not like this. Bless you for helping him. It's alot for you too. Thank you for another great video. Love from Miami ❤🌞🌊🏖️
Wow you have to sympathise I watch loads of videos about hoarding they can’t see it it is a mental health issue, well done for getting involved as you say it’s your house where is he going to ?
You both deserve a medal! Bless all of you ❤️you both are caring natured people but you have to have a line.
Well done so proud of you both xx
Oh Fern; this breaks my heart.
I know in the US there's service's that will help in ; regarding horders and other disorders.
Just a suggestion.
You and Ryan are such good people. OF course I know that before ; but it's such a testimony to the people you are.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and Ryan.
Love you guy's! ❤
Oh Fern, what a task! If anyone is up for the challenge, it’s you guys. Curious to know if the man has somewhere in place to move to?
Oh heavens Faye! Just catching up. French real estate laws are severely lacking if you have to endure this as legal owners of the home. This situation needs professional help to get this poor man, not only off your property, but to get him placed somewhere safe. Are there so social services in France you can use?
You are good people.
I would hire professionals who deal with hoarders and remove their stuff.
They have them here in California.
It’s about $2500 a day.
Hi guys, I fear for you both. A friend eventually got their property back after the people were evicted. Grasse. It took years to eventually get them out. The law is on his side. Don’t let it drag on change the locks already. You can’t push anybody out during the winter. He could end up with squatters rights. Does he have anywhere to go. Did he get paid anything? He might not of had an inheritance if he as a lot of dept. Perhaps contact the social services and get legal advice. This is probably why you got the property. I understand how you feel. So sad. He is not listening to you. Three months was enough.
Does this man have any family members? Where is he moving to? I feel sorry for both of you having to deal with that? You have been so kind to him. I hope all goes well. 😀
Bless his heart. My hurts for him. His life must be in terminal. You are being so kind.