Im a 57 year old man : Divorced and Alone: My Struggle with Loneliness Buy me a Coffee www.buymeacoffee.com/GeraldFiore My Amazon Wishlist www.amazon.co.uk/hz/wishlist/ls/3MB72FR08A7I7?ref_=wl_share
You are a Wonderful human being ❤!. Love yourself much better and then you will be able to love that woman that you met in that way!. Are you understanding. Sometimes people need to be alone to find their own thoughts ❤!. Thank you for this video!. You know , Chon !. he is my cousin lives in London !. I have a friend too she is an actress!. Her name is Gladys Ibarra!. Recently she made a commedy movie ❤. By for now Gerald. Ah, there is another one, but she got married in other place there oh her name is Mariela Celis, but she is now in Venezuela, her husband is from " ireland ". One of the friends from my oldest doughter bárbara lives in Ireland with his family too. You are not alone, you have many friends here supporting!.
Get over it. And I mean no disrespect but I've been on my own for 10 years now but actually 30 years now and it's going to be okay 🙏🏼 focus on your spiritual being. It's going to be okay
LOL, 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 you got over 7,000 Subscribers being Divorced, Depressed, and Alone, and I cannot even get to 100 on my other channel, posting Music Videos. LOL, maybe I should Choose another niche. LOL, 😂 😂 😂 😂
“I used to think that the worst thing in life was to end up alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel alone.” .Robin Williams
A true legend 👏 saddens me to see his light in movies or interviews etc. A master of hiding the truth I guess. They say genius is next to insanity, I agree to a point. A active mind that can not be honed, is a gift and a real curs. And the smarter you are the smarter you hide it. Until you can't. I grew up with Robins best work, a true pioneer in comedy.😊
Maybe his Wife and daughter were the typicalCOLD White independent Women that We See here in the USA and he felt ALONE. And he made the decision to end his life. He chose the Wrong Wify.
63 divorced no kids family all gone friends far away in other parts of the states. Work 7 days week. Absolutely alone...but I talk to the Lord and he shows me where to go and what decisions I should make...magically its always all right.....your are not alone...no one ever calls me on my phone.....
@@shafserious2805 nothing wrong with the dogs, they are part of his life and he loves them. Stop trying to dictate your views on others. I'm defo not into human companionship and could spend every day alone, my pets are my life. You stick with your life, I'm sure, to many, including him, your life is dull.
It is scary, but as we get older everyone melts away. You have to get used to it. Focus on you. Exercise to keep yourself strong so you don’t need to go into care , lots of us are living alone Including me , parents both deceased and it does come to us all, it’s vital that you have a self care routine.
I lost my best little friend two weeks ago, she was my life; a little Jack Russell aged 22. I'm alone and that's ok, but the gap she's left is huge. I have found faith, and that's hard to come by, I also ride my bike. It will be OK. We are all STRONG.
I was very lonely and it was all around me . From a teenager my first experience of loneliness haunted me even though I was with both parents and my brother. I have always felt this way. There are no answers. I can only say that years of enduring this feeling has made me realise I'm not unique. As humans we need company there are more lonely people than you think. They just deal with it without sharing their thoughts , but I can guarantee there's thousands out there now all dealing with this overwhelming loneliness. I'm sorry I have no answers as I'm 65 and suffered from 14 years old . I am lucky now though because I'm with someone and have been since 2001. He's the right person because he listens and we communicate and talk. So I feel alone sometimes but then I have him there to take it away. But it may not last , and sometimes I regress back to knowing that loneliness is just around the corner ready to grab me. So what I'm trying to say is there's no easy answer to this BUT having family and a good person by your side is what's needed. You have 50% , family, and you also have two girls that will always be around, especially when you eventually become a grandad. Girls are good for the family, they are naturally nurturing. I know your youngest will be there for you as you are close now and from what you say there's a special Father daughter bond. So now you need a mate, I met my sole mate at 60 and I never ever thought I would meet the man of my dreams. So remember to just tackle each day and not to dwell , as that really does your head in . Night x
@@whichypoohs I'm so sorry honey. It's a special kind of pain. The world moves on and you're still hurting. Pushing hugs through the computer to you ❤️
I am 55 and all alone, On Monday I had to put down one of my 15 yr old cats due to cancer, now there is a missing meow sound, sure I still have 5 cats left, but when a pet is gone, there is a certain emptyness of what was.
Seems like you are overthinking just now,try distraction because when we start to overthink we go down rabbit holes. I say to stop myself when i start to worry and overthink and tell myself that for now things are ok and i will deal with what happens IF and WHEN it happens. A lot of people don't like to be alone. Maybe think about doing voluntary work so you can mix with people.
Being alone takes practice. But once you adjust and get the hang of it (and it takes several years) you find out it’s really not bad at all. You’ll see.
My marriage ended when I was 39! I have two grown sons, one lives out of town. I used to have friends but not anymore. I'll be 55 this Friday and have lived alone all this time. I have a dog who's great company. I see my youngest son on Sundays and see my older one when I can. My father passed years ago and my mother is 86 with dementia and limited mobility. I take her out every Thursday but she has little to say and can't remember anything she did a minute ago. I've grown to enjoy living alone. I dont find it scary but freeing. You have to be your own best friend as corny as that sounds. Make it a point to go outside every day even if it's just for a walk. Join a gym or a club or take up a new hobby. Things will change and as long as you make the effort you will meet people whether it be friends or a girlfriend. Your channel has an audience of lonely people who can relate.
I know what you mean. I actually enjoy listening to your videos. You probably dont realise this, but you re keeping company and reaching thousands of people around the world
There is nothing wrong with living with your parents. I just don 't understand what is the stigma?!?! Anyhow, you should consider yourself lucky, you have children and few other people in your life. I am 40 and have nobody, no friends, no relatives and no prospect of relationship
Im 62. Ive been a widow for 2 1/2 years now. Im moving out and my kids are buying the house. I will be all alone. But not really because Jesus is with me.
I'm 60 and I've lived alone for 20 odd years now and absolutely love it. I'm actually considering seeing a psychiatrist to work out why I don't have a problem with it but everyone I know seems to think I should! 🤷🏽♀️
(1) I was surrounded by many people for a number of years (2) I was a good person (3) I did everything a nice person should from an emotional standpoint (4) However I had mental health problems (5) I became depressed for along peroid of time (6) Because I was not a "productive member of society" it damaned my reputation (7) All that effort I put in over the years/decades was forgotten (8) Now Im living in a different city by my self. (9) I don't have anything to do with my ungrateful (Family of origin) (10) I am a bit of a loner at this point in life. (11) Whats the point of my ramblings? (12) Being around people does not necessarily mean they will appreciate your efforts (13) All that time could have been spent on focusing on you. (14) You choose your path in life. (15) Being lonely is a state of mind (16) From a purely selfish perspective I prefer my time to my self. (17) I got little to nothing back for my efforts anyway. (18) Alot of people were brought up with this idea of societies and inclusive communities. (19) Sadly thats not the case for all of us. (20) You can still be nice to randoms you met along the way though. (21) Be happy you live in the time of internet (22) Unlike growing up in the 70s and 80s... (23) Being alone was a thousand times worse.....
I’m a 55 year old man who’s been alone nearly 8 years since my girlfriend left me. I totally love the quiet life. I go for regular walks have indoor hobbies which I get lost in for hours and hours. I find it’s all about mind set. Having something to occupy your mind besides TV is a big plus. Play your favourite music stay away from social media and fill your home with your own spirit and energy. Look for positives in being alone instead of beating yourself up because you are alone. Your home your life your decisions. It’s perfectly possible to find joy in the quiet moments. I beg of you to try and change your mindset and start looking outwards instead of inwards. Anything is possible but you have to want it. Enjoy the company of your dogs now while they are here rather than worrying about the time when they are not. This is all a waste if your precious time. You are an amazing human being just as you are. Find peace in just being you.
OMG I can’t watch this video. I got to 6.50 on the timer and I was tearing up. You described my life. It’s not easy Gerald. I think you need to count your blessings. I AM alone. I am a 58 year old female living in Sydney Australia. I have no husband. No boyfriend. No children. No parents. I nursed my parents for many years before they passed away. My friends slowly dropped by the wayside as our lives grew in different directions when I was caring for my beautiful parents and my responsibilities/utter exhaustion meant I could never meet up with them. I could get in contact with friends now but I have crippling anxiety and am battling with severe depression. The depression is improving (this video didn’t help me this morning!) but I can only think about one day at a time or I get overwhelmed. You will have to find purpose when you ARE actually alone. In the meantime Gerald stop obsessing and living in fear of it and embrace, nurture and relish in what you actually have. I was terrified but knew I had to make a difference in the world or indeed there really was no purpose of me being here. No one would miss me. No one would even know, I knew I’d prob be found years after my demise one of those terribly sad reports you hear about on the news about a skeleton found on the kitchen floor 10 years after passing away. But I wanted to live. So I got some formal (mostly) online training in looking after people with disabilities. I’ve been working in this field 5 years now and I get so much joy from my work. I make a difference. My life now has purpose. Things could always be worse. One day at a time Gerald. That’s all any of us can do.
@@gerofiore9695 I truely hope you make more positive videos in time, for the simple reason that when you do, you’ll be seeing some beauty in life! I hope you didn’t take my words as being critical towards you. I am a fan and I have always enjoyed your videos - mainly for your honesty. This was the first one I couldn’t watch to the end as it was just too confronting for me. I was stuck in a negative loop of thoughts for many years. I now have to watch out for triggers that I worry may bring that negativity back. To clear my head, (after my initial comment) I took a lovely walk to shake off my unease. Admired the beautiful blue sky, felt the cool crisp morning air on my face and in my lungs, listened to the birds, stopped at a nearby park to stare at the sunlight through a dew drop on a leaf (people who saw me prob thought “there’s a crazy one”!). On the way home i saw a perfectly formed spider’s web, totally covered in tiny dew drops sparkling in the sun’s rays, just miraculous beauty, breathtaking! And now I’m back home, having confirmed that life is beautiful… even though I am alone. It always was beautiful. I just couldn’t see it. Love and blessings dear man. ❤️
59....dog died 27 days ago. Best friend died. Kids off doing their natural moving on. You darn right its scary. From mom and dad to marriage at 19. Looking around me trying to come up with Some one to team up with. Mentally struggling actually.
I’m a 59 year old man. Huge dog lover. Losing a dog is hell. I’m sorry for your loss! I feel so out of touch in this world. Nothing makes any sense anymore. It’s so hard to connect with people at our age! I hope you find someone to go through life as it sucks being alone.
@@naturerules3371 It can’t be stressed enough , if you’ve got a local leisure centre , join up . They’ve got sessions on for us oldies (over-50’s) constantly , whether it’s swimming , badminton , whatever . Of course the downside is you’ve got to go home at some point , but at least we’ve got the internet nowadays and there’s loads of online communities to keep your fingers busy
@@naturerules3371 your spot on. I hope you're pushing on everyday. I would describe this "out of touch" feeling as almost being caught in a weird episode of the twilight zone about time travel. I must have fallen asleep leaning against a tree and woke up to find people I knew aged and places I knew either torn down or turned into completely different things. On occasion I wake up from sleep and still look for my dog. Thanks for your comment....it reassures me I haven't gone mad.✌️
Hey bro, I hear you. I've been alone for the past eight years since my partner left. I have no children or family here in New Zealand. I have found the Holy Spirit to be my friend. Always there, always available to talk and listen to telepathically. I am not alone, I walk with God, I'm guided by His Holy Spirit. 👍🙏
Gerald. I have had the most horrendous things happen in life. I can’t say here ! Most awful things a woman can experience. The other week my cat had 9 stillborn kittens ! I took my giant rabbit to be castrated; he had a heart attack & died ! My brother died this year of a brain tumour. All my best mates are dead & the other stuff is much worse !!!! Think what the future holds for you ! Look how well your Chanel is doing. You have so much to look forward too !! We all go through shit & worry ourselves sick about the future xx
Probably said this before, but I've been separated now for almost 5 years. I have twin daughters who mean everything to me, but these past five years have been the most lonely and the most isolating. I live from one day to the next for my girls, but feel profoundly sad inside and depressed. When the girls are with their mother, I come home to silence and emptiness. It used to be that I'd come home to the sound of children playing and having fun. That's all gone. And like you, I watch On The Buses, then Minder, Rising Damp and the months and the years go by and I just get older. It's just an existence. I suppose I'm lucky that I got joint Custody, so I do have the girls with me quite a lot of the time. Not quite teenagers yet, but they will be one day. Then I will really be alone, as they make their own way in life. I want to change my life, but seem unable to. Like you, I'm stuck.
Tell your story 100 times, I'll still read and listen to your thoughts, you're a good bloke. And like myself watch those Rising Damp, O the buses, Man about the house hehe, I can really relate.
@user-fp8ov7lh8z 0 seconds ago You need to make some new friends, and I'm talking to myself as well. Don't try and make friends randomly, use your imagination first, and then try - weirder things happen all the time.
I'm a 46 year old man and live alone and love the freedom I actually enjoy my alone life I feel very fortunate I also have a 24 year old son who I don't see regularly and do not have any other family who I'm in contact with I say enjoy it you will meet the right person when you go out to socialise I suggest groups hobbies and even to your local pub to meet people I hope this has helped a bit😊
loneliness is hard but i always say even being married you have to make and find ur own happiness . i’m alone a lot while my hubby travels i completely keep myself busy i stay on a schedule i go to the gym to workout . find a hobby that you enjoy . you have to love urself before you can love anyone else . i feel today that people depend on others way too much i don’t depend on anyone i make my own happiness and live life alone 50 percent of the time .
I was completely on my own for 15 years bringing up three children,they left home and I had a good social life,going to lots of music gigs. Met an amazing man and that was six years ago. Get yourself out there, music brings people together
I am convinced that your channel won't dry out as long as you are authentic. You speak about real humans challenges e.g. loneliness is a serious problem of our society. And apart of those you are exposing yourself, this is generous behaviour, I'm lonely and when I listen people like you ( although you're one unique) I feel connected and more happy, take care Gerald , maybe think about beautiful colours in your future place. About plants , painting, art
It´s totally normal for you to feel that way. It´s totally normal to feel the fear and the pain of realizing all of a sudden you´re all alone, there´s no one there anymore, and you are very much on your own. No one expecting you or calling you to see how you´re doing. What´s the point of living if there´s no one to share your life with? I´m going through precisely that at this point in my life. I´m 58 years old, never married for some reason or another, I spent almost my entire life living close to or with my parents. I´ve been taking care of my mother for the last 25 years and it turns out, she´s the only person in the world I have any connection with. I have no girlfriend, no friends, no real connections with anyone. I do have two sisters and a brother who I rarely speak to. So, one day, this is back in 2017, my Mom went on a trip to visit one of my sisters in Atlanta - I was going to spend Xmas alone in the house in Mexico. Didn´t make too much of it at first, but then something happened. I got home, the house was empty, it was total silence, and it just wasn´t "my home" any more. It was a just a house, and I felt so so lonely and terrified of my future when my Mom is no longer in this world with me. What´s going to happen to me? What will be the point of living if there is no one to share my days or my life with? Eventually my Mom came back, and things went back to normal. But, every once in a while I rememeber that day when I just broke down in my car and didn´t want to open the door to go into that house again. You should know that life goes on, with or without your loved ones. It´s normal to feel fearful and terrified - but it´s all up to you. You have to become your own best friend and have fun. I started a foundation and I rescue abandoned and mistreated dogs, I have 30 dogs at this moment. That has helped me a lot to cope with loneliness. I´ve met a lot of people that do similar things - just seeing my puppies in the morning and walking them every day makes me very happy. I also have a number of activities, I´m learning languages among other things. Try to have as much fun as possible - don´t allow thoughts and negative emotions take control of your life - emotions are your enemy and your worst nightmare if you don´t keep them in check. God bless you and best wishes to you.
I’m 64 and just had a baby with my Thai wife of 14 years and loving it. If you really want to find a companion then come to Thailand and make a fresh start! You can totally reinvent yourself here and live very affordably. Just be very choosy if you do and understand it’s a different world here and so are the women. That said they are amazing mates if you find the right one (not at a bar) The other option is to look at the freedom you now have as a great opportunity! The world is your oyster! You can go anywhere and see anything you want. It’s the ultimate You Time! What you have is peace - not loneliness! How lucky you are! It’s all about your attitude. Your life is what you make it and nothing else. You’re alive to live- not to worry and waste away. We got to be happy in our own skins first and being a single older guy comes with a lot of potential for amazing experiences. But only you can make the choice.
Well done on becoming a dad. I heard Thai women are often out to take loads of money from a western man, and that it is financially very costly being in a long-term relationship with one! I find that a bit sad if it's true, what's your take on this ?
As a Irishman living in Australia, the hardest thing I had to overcome was lonelyness, it's very hard , it's takes a long time to overcome. Good luck .
I'm the same age as you and used to think that way but don't feel your on your own it's a part of life unfortunately you have all of us to keep you company sending warm vibes from Ireland ✨🕊️☘️
It may feel like that at first but that is the opportunity to discover yourself and who you really are as opposed to being a co dependant and not knowing yourself without others there.
I went through divorce in the UK, lived on my own for 9 years, had my dog for company for 7 of those years and then his life came to an end. I had tried the dating game for a while during those 9 years but gave it up as a lost cause, it was a joke. So when my dog went I thought what do I do now, do I just sit here with my head in my hands every day, dreading the long cold winters. At age 62 I decided the UK had nothing to offer me so I made a big and bold decision, I decided to leave the country and make a new life for myself. My destination was the Philippines, that was 15 years ago, my life has been rejuvenated, I am re-married to a beautiful filipina, the sun shines almost every day, the people here are very friendly and I haven't been cold in all those years. Don't sit there complaining about life if you are in a position to do something about it, get off your backside and make things happen for you, fortune favours the brave. I have no regrets about my decision, my new life is going very well..
Om 67 now suffered lonliness and insomnia all my life, its hard. Lonliness is soooo painfull. I have a strong christian faith and it really helps me. God bless💖
You are not alone, i feel exactly the same way after my mum & dad died and after 2 failed relationships. Its something im STILL working on, stay strong & take care.
I'm there already.. for a year. Alone everyday at home, time flies...daughter gone ,married..when they go you hardly see them, they have their own lives to live now. Dogs died, just me..internet and a spliff helps me sleep and avoids reality a little..avoid medication like the plague.
My mother & best friend are not going to be around for much longer, but I’m trying to enjoy the moment with them & life in general “ that’s all we’ve got - The past is already gone, the future is not yet here, there is only one moment for you to live , and that is in the present moment.
Always good to watch your channel, very supportive to folks watching your channel, I am sure you are helping others for ✔️ sure, keep the faith I am sure your channel will open doors for you all the best to you and your family including your dogs 🐕✅👍⭐️
Lastly, but more to mention but I guess I will stop. Both my parents died from Dementia, my mother the end of Mar of this year 2024, My father 3 yrs before. I still have a sick sister who has been in a home since 4 years old, who's list of things wrong I cannot count or pronounce. Abandonment is another thing I have experienced very much in my life as well, my stepmother for one, when my father died she vanished into thin air, like a ghost. Not surprised, I always seen this coming and saw the detachment from day one. Always disagreed with every last solitary word I ever said. The only reason she ever called me was if she needed something from me only. Something I could do for her only. As you can see you are not alone, no pun intended, I think we all have our hard to bear stories.
Gerald. I'm 59 and can't hold onto a relationship. I got my Aggy, Siberian Husky. Life is beautiful. And I have made friends with other dog owners. On another point, I recently learnt how I'm such a people pleaser and was always seeking validation. I couldn't get enough. Deep issues from childhood. Anyways, I then watched some great youtube vids on how not to 'need' validation. Really helping in all aspects. Also diet is 86% of the problem.
Hi Gerald Thank you for sharing your stories . I enjoy checking in with you . Loneliness can be a tricky thing to deal with, so I really get what you are saying . 🙏
I chose to be alone. And recently cut off family too. I only stay in contact with ppl who I can trust and are loyal. Been betrayed so many times I'm red raw from the knives in my back. But I have hobbies. Interests. And pets. At 55 I'm starting a small business and YT channel too. Being alone means. Putting yourself first. Not wasting your time and energy on others. Focus on yourself and give yourself goals. Once you get used to being alone you don't want anyone to come along and disturb your tranquility. 14 yrs I chose celibacy My body is my own also. So much benefits to it. Look at it as a positive not a negative. I now see married couples and glad I'm not tied to anyone. No compromising. No drama. No answering to anyone but yourself. I love it. 😁
Solitude is a strange thing,, it does funny things to your mind, you start to wonder why you always crave for entertainment,, or a subject to entertain you,, when the reality it's about how you deal with the passing of time in your head. How you relax and deal with that.. We do anything to avoid that solitude but it's the one thing you need to face in life to become wise.. Also facing solitude with no way out is on another level. Great conversation mate... 👍
Try being alone. I never thought I could do it - it takes getting used to it but now I love my own company. There is a difference between alone and lonely. I was in a 25 yr old marriage and never felt so lonely as u was at that time. You need to build the most important relationship you will ever have - with yourself. I’ve watched a few of your videos and I don’t think it will be as bad as you think.
My advice is get a really nice dog, like a Labrador, I'm 50 and was lonely and I got a blond Labrador and we do everything together she is without a doubt the most important thing in my life and you build such a incredible bond with them I dont know what I'd do without her..
I'm also 57 and I often worry about loneliness if I lose my partner or friends. I lost two friends to cancer and as you get older the loss doesn't get less. But you have two options, you either engage with society and new people or you don't. And if you feel lonely within four walls then the ultimate answer to that would be to share a property with someone else. It's easy for me to say this, but like most things in life it's harder to do. You may well be 57 but you still have a journey ahead of you. x
Get a little place with a roommate? Share a place with others? Volunteer to keep busy and meet people. You have many talents to share. So many of us in the world are alone and lonely. It is hard, but it forces us to grow and take care of our lives. As you get stronger you might feel more comfortable inviting others to your home to hang out. It isn't our kids burden to be our best friends. It will just make them feel sad and burdened by you. As hard as life is, we have to take responsibility for ourselves. No parents, women, or children will rescue you (us). I say this with love although I know you do not want to hear anyone's advice. I also have extreme social anxiety, depression and learning disabilities. I have always worked and taken care and responsibility for myself...how? Because I had to..no one to take care of me financially, etc. You would be surprised what you are capable of when you have to. You will learn and grow and have gratitude for so many little things. You will gain self respect and your children will be proud of you. ❤❤❤ With love
I remember a date back in December 25 2014, probably one of the worst dates in my life. My common-law spouse left me and tried to suck money out of me through the legal system, and make me look bad on top of that, I phoned my son who badmouthed me so bad I could not listen any further, and totally out of the blue, he went on and on and took his time badmouthing me, I got a call from my stepmother who told me my father had dementia and needed me to come from Ontario to BC. I was all alone as well, no friends to call on, I also had to go through the process of a long drive and leave to go to BC, lots of plans for the moving process all on Christmas eve. How is that for the holiday spirit? We all have our stories, all we can do is hope it changes for the better at some point.
I’ve always liked my own company and don’t mind being alone, even through having 3 children and relationships. As my children have grown older and 2 moved on, I find myself single and I felt the pang of loneliness and also a sense of purpose missing. My advice would be don’t be afraid of being alone and to go there experience it and explore what comes up for you. For me never really putting energy into my self care as I was busy caring for so many others, it’s great having the time and energy to get to know and invest in myself. It’s a sign of good parenting that your kids are independent. It sounds like you may have co dependence issues to explore. We all are a work in progress 🙏
The UK has lost the idea of family values. Loneliness is the result. Compare this with Asian and Muslims in the UK. Their children maintain their connections with their parents and they are respected and honoured in their communities.
Loads of us fall asleep watching vids or on social media, your children are still young. You’ll spend time on social media, listen to music, read, housework, gardening, cooking, phone calls etc. and having a big bed to yourself is fine too. Think of the people who have lost their partners through death. I have a son but he is married and lives in Greece. I spend weeks and weeks if not months without seeing anyone and it’s ok. Really, don’t think about it now, it’s too overwhelming for you, it’s a gradual process anyway, it won’t all happen at once sweetie xxx
@@yayyay3060 You guys wont believe this but Ive never realised, once you get used to it you don't hear it any longer, that's amazing, ok will get one, hehe
Mate, I can empathise but I really think you need a job. You spend alot of time getting into your own head, thinking negative thoughts. You’ve got too much time on your hands. You need a purpose, a reason for living beyond family and your dogs. I’m flat out working 8 hours minimum Mon to Fri- less time to think about the fact I’m 47, still single, have no kids or close family or dwell on my empty meaningless life. Flip the negative thinking around into a positive- you have kids, lots of people want them but haven’t been able to - for what ever reason. You have a wife, experienced love - giving and receiving it. Beautiful dogs who you love dearly. Snap out of it - you need to switch things up. It’s a mindset.
I remember at age 10 sitting in the back seat with my two other sisters, Mom and baby in the front, Dad driving us home from vacation. Driving on the interstate - I’d feel such sadness over all the dilapidated old vacated barns. Derelict farm equipment abandoned in the field of overgrown grass and weeds. Nothing lasting and all disintegrating. I new then and there someday I’d be alone and my family would end. Fast forward 45 years here I am - now my husband’s gone. I struggle everyday.
The brutal truth is that no one will save you. You HAVE to get out there and connect. You HAVE to make the effort. Doing these videos, for example, is an excellent thing. You made this channel happen, and you can make a new social life happen as well. Life is constant change. People come and go, and no relationship, not even with your mum or your child, is permanent. But you’ve got a lot going for you. You’re a very likeable, kind, warm human being. You’ll have no trouble meeting new people. You said in a previous video that you used to like art. Adult colleges often run free art classes. My advice would be to join them, take up drawing and painting, and talk to the other students. Keep trying, over and over, until you find your people. You’re clearly a sensitive, arty sort of guy, and you need to be around sensitive, arty people. The key is sharing a common interest.
There is a time of year when loneliness really hits home, it is the time between Christmas and the new year,, years ago when I lived at home, the family next door had two teenagers they were around 17/18 years of age, the younger sister was always out with boyfriends but the older sister always stayed at home and rarely went out, she was also less attractive than her sister, anyway on New Years eve, the older sister went for a walk and jumped off the top of a tower block, I wish I had spoken to her more often when she was alive, but I did not and always ignored her, not on purpose, it is just the way things were, this was 40 years ago in south London, Forest Hill and now and again, I think about how lonely she must have been
BEING ALONE CAN BE SCARY AT TIMES BUT SOLITUDE IS ALSO A WONDERFUL WAY TO GET TO KNOW YOURSELF AND NOT BE DISTRACTED WITH CHAOS AND STRESS THAT PEOPLE CAN BRING THAT IS WHY SHE IS YOUR EX I HAVE BEEN ALONE FOR YEARS AND I AM BEGINNING TO LOVE IT SO IF SOMEONE ENTERS MY LIFE THEY MUST BE GOOD FOR ME OR THEY MUST GO AND IM ALONE YES BUT IM NOT LONELY A LOT JUST SOMETIMES WE MUST STILL LOOK FOR LOVE AND JOY 🙏🏿
I'm facing this soon, part of me is looking forward to the alone time. Not having to please other people, not having to do anything if I don't want. It's just the longevity that's a bit daunting.
Hello Gerald. As a 53 year old woman, I suggest you start going to latin dancing classes. There are usually more women than men for a start to pick from as a dance partner. You will have fun, the latin music is lively, salsa dancing in particular is of happy sounding music and you will meet like-minded people who are open to other cultures whilst having fun. You would make friends there and possibly find yourself a woman of your own. Finding such new friends and possibly a forever dance partner, your woman will mean you will never have loneliness. If I lived where you live (I live in Australia) I would be your latin dancing partner if you would have liked me to be. I would have liked to be your friend and possibly even your woman if we were compatible. You would not feel loneliness if I was your woman.
hey Gerald, I feel you but all that negative thinking won't get you anywhere my friend, you can't stop time from passing and things changing. Embrace what time you got left and make the most out of it. You will still be able to see your kids in the future, and maybe you will have new pets when you are older. You can always meet a new woman as well, never give up. I'v been alone for a long time, I stopped struggling with loneliness the day I decided to respect and take care of myself.
You have to learn to be your own best friend. Find something you're passionate about, but don't dwell on yourself and being alone. We're all alone to some extent.
Making new friends is as bad as dating. I keep finding people distrusting of ME but taking my trust for granted. Its like new ones come along then disappear and none stay. Dont see this new space as dead. It is a free space where u can delve deep into your interests, eat sleep and wash in a non threatening relaxed space. Keep it clean and calm and peace will follow, it took me a good five months.
@@chrisstones3488 yesterday noticed progress stretching my back and seeing some muscle develop, then got a reply from the uk champion on instagram because id been commenting on her videos. I was so overwhelmed, really motivated me to practice more and eat better! 🤩
hi gerald i listen to your story of your life i know how you feel i lost my long term partner after 45 years ,my mother lost my father when i was 12 and lived alone since then .how im dealing with it gerald im out there doing things different now camping fishing being into nature and meeting new people life is great
I also have this loneliness problem. No one seems to want me, romantically or for friendship and it seems people only contact me when they want something. I usually end up going to a bar and bingeing now and again for an escape or just to talk to people, although I don't recommend alcohol/drugs at all for this. Gyms for me are Very lonely, the most lonely of places. Most of the guys in one I go to are much younger and I have no interest in talking to them. I had a couple of very good online pen-pals, and it did help me at the time, but alas! It could be helpful for you too to have someone u can text regularly perhaps.
Being alone can be a gift or a darkness. I’m states away from my family. I miss them, of course, however….. I enjoy living alone. Loneliness is different from living alone. Guess it’s a personality type. I’ve always enjoyed private time.
Im a 57 year old man : Divorced and Alone: My Struggle with Loneliness
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You are a Wonderful human being ❤!. Love yourself much better and then you will be able to love that woman that you met in that way!. Are you understanding. Sometimes people need to be alone to find their own thoughts ❤!. Thank you for this video!. You know , Chon !. he is my cousin lives in London !. I have a friend too she is an actress!. Her name is Gladys Ibarra!. Recently she made a commedy movie ❤. By for now Gerald. Ah, there is another one, but she got married in other place there oh her name is Mariela Celis, but she is now in Venezuela, her husband is from " ireland ". One of the friends from my oldest doughter bárbara lives in Ireland with his family too. You are not alone, you have many friends here supporting!.
@@YvonnePatiñoOrdaz Thankyou for your kind words
@@gerofiore9695 you are not alone!. 🤗🤗
Get over it. And I mean no disrespect but I've been on my own for 10 years now but actually 30 years now and it's going to be okay 🙏🏼 focus on your spiritual being. It's going to be okay
LOL, 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 you got over 7,000 Subscribers being Divorced, Depressed, and Alone, and I cannot even get to 100 on my other channel, posting Music Videos. LOL, maybe I should Choose another niche. LOL, 😂 😂 😂 😂
“I used to think that the worst thing in life was to end up alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel alone.”
.Robin Williams
A true legend 👏 saddens me to see his light in movies or interviews etc. A master of hiding the truth I guess. They say genius is next to insanity, I agree to a point. A active mind that can not be honed, is a gift and a real curs. And the smarter you are the smarter you hide it. Until you can't. I grew up with Robins best work, a true pioneer in comedy.😊
Well said🍀🍀🍀
Maybe his Wife and daughter were the typicalCOLD White independent Women that We See here in the USA and he felt ALONE. And he made the decision to end his life. He chose the Wrong Wify.
63 divorced no kids family all gone friends far away in other parts of the states. Work 7 days week. Absolutely alone...but I talk to the Lord and he shows me where to go and what decisions I should make...magically its always all right.....your are not alone...no one ever calls me on my phone.....
Dude you have to love your own company and you will never be alone
He must be used to it now but there is a limit. He needs to get rid of those pesky dogs!
@@shafserious2805 nothing wrong with the dogs, they are part of his life and he loves them. Stop trying to dictate your views on others. I'm defo not into human companionship and could spend every day alone, my pets are my life. You stick with your life, I'm sure, to many, including him, your life is dull.
True I've been alone many years and rather enjoy the peace and quiet...
That is so very true!!
Being alone, that is...
I am a widow now at 67, and disabled with chronic pain, and have to fight every day not to be depressed. My faith helps me through.
Amen
It is scary, but as we get older everyone melts away. You have to get used to it. Focus on you. Exercise to keep yourself strong so you don’t need to go into care , lots of us are living alone Including me , parents both deceased and it does come to us all, it’s vital that you have a self care routine.
So True, thankyou Jill
Thank you for saying that ❤
@@kylabutler2195 you are welcome , thank you for liking my comment,, take care ..
I lost my best little friend two weeks ago, she was my life; a little Jack Russell aged 22. I'm alone and that's ok, but the gap she's left is huge. I have found faith, and that's hard to come by, I also ride my bike. It will be OK. We are all STRONG.
I was very lonely and it was all around me . From a teenager my first experience of loneliness haunted me even though I was with both parents and my brother. I have always felt this way. There are no answers. I can only say that years of enduring this feeling has made me realise I'm not unique. As humans we need company there are more lonely people than you think. They just deal with it without sharing their thoughts , but I can guarantee there's thousands out there now all dealing with this overwhelming loneliness. I'm sorry I have no answers as I'm 65 and suffered from 14 years old . I am lucky now though because I'm with someone and have been since 2001. He's the right person because he listens and we communicate and talk. So I feel alone sometimes but then I have him there to take it away. But it may not last , and sometimes I regress back to knowing that loneliness is just around the corner ready to grab me. So what I'm trying to say is there's no easy answer to this BUT having family and a good person by your side is what's needed. You have 50% , family, and you also have two girls that will always be around, especially when you eventually become a grandad. Girls are good for the family, they are naturally nurturing. I know your youngest will be there for you as you are close now and from what you say there's a special Father daughter bond. So now you need a mate, I met my sole mate at 60 and I never ever thought I would meet the man of my dreams. So remember to just tackle each day and not to dwell , as that really does your head in . Night x
I very sorry for your loss, my friend. Be strong.
@@whichypoohs I'm so sorry honey. It's a special kind of pain. The world moves on and you're still hurting. Pushing hugs through the computer to you ❤️
I lost my Jack Russell at Christmas, he was 18. I'm thinking of you❤
I am 55 and all alone, On Monday I had to put down one of my 15 yr old cats due to cancer, now there is a missing meow sound, sure I still have 5 cats left, but when a pet is gone, there is a certain emptyness of what was.
Someone once told me that if your biggest issue in life is feeling lonely then your not doing to bad
"being alone is scary". Gerald, there's being alone and there's being lonely. Big difference.
Seems like you are overthinking just now,try distraction because when we start to overthink we go down rabbit holes. I say to stop myself when i start to worry and overthink and tell myself that for now things are ok and i will deal with what happens IF and WHEN it happens. A lot of people don't like to be alone. Maybe think about doing voluntary work so you can mix with people.
Once you get over the loneliness, and you do, you realize you are better off and happier being single.
It's true
The alternative is far far worse.
Being alone takes practice. But once you adjust and get the hang of it (and it takes several years) you find out it’s really not bad at all. You’ll see.
My marriage ended when I was 39! I have two grown sons, one lives out of town. I used to have friends but not anymore. I'll be 55 this Friday and have lived alone all this time. I have a dog who's great company. I see my youngest son on Sundays and see my older one when I can. My father passed years ago and my mother is 86 with dementia and limited mobility. I take her out every Thursday but she has little to say and can't remember anything she did a minute ago. I've grown to enjoy living alone. I dont find it scary but freeing. You have to be your own best friend as corny as that sounds. Make it a point to go outside every day even if it's just for a walk. Join a gym or a club or take up a new hobby. Things will change and as long as you make the effort you will meet people whether it be friends or a girlfriend. Your channel has an audience of lonely people who can relate.
I know what you mean. I actually enjoy listening to your videos. You probably dont realise this, but you re keeping company and reaching thousands of people around the world
Oh thankyou
I'm 53 never married no kids. Live on my own in the bush for the last 5 years. All day everyday alone. Harden up gentlemen
There is nothing wrong with living with your parents. I just don 't understand what is the stigma?!?! Anyhow, you should consider yourself lucky, you have children and few other people in your life. I am 40 and have nobody, no friends, no relatives and no prospect of relationship
I have been alone for 5 years, and I love it.
Same. Get a few bouts of loneliness. Otherwise, just alone. Would love a companion
Im 62. Ive been a widow for 2 1/2 years now. Im moving out and my kids are buying the house. I will be all alone. But not really because Jesus is with me.
Stay with your kids.
Don't go nowhere.
Good you have kids...and you have Jesus. I find churches good places to get genuine friends
same here.... the Lord is close to the broken hearted.... Psalm 34 it saved my life. read it it will make you cry
I’m so sorry, please don’t feel your ever alone because your right Jesus IS with you.🤍xx
You’ll never be alone when you have Jesus!!!😀
I'm 60 and I've lived alone for 20 odd years now and absolutely love it. I'm actually considering seeing a psychiatrist to work out why I don't have a problem with it but everyone I know seems to think I should! 🤷🏽♀️
@@christislord2832 well said.
No matter how we plan having family or without, we will end by being alone.
(1) I was surrounded by many people for a number of years
(2) I was a good person
(3) I did everything a nice person should from an emotional standpoint
(4) However I had mental health problems
(5) I became depressed for along peroid of time
(6) Because I was not a "productive member of society" it damaned my reputation
(7) All that effort I put in over the years/decades was forgotten
(8) Now Im living in a different city by my self.
(9) I don't have anything to do with my ungrateful (Family of origin)
(10) I am a bit of a loner at this point in life.
(11) Whats the point of my ramblings?
(12) Being around people does not necessarily mean they will appreciate your efforts
(13) All that time could have been spent on focusing on you.
(14) You choose your path in life.
(15) Being lonely is a state of mind
(16) From a purely selfish perspective I prefer my time to my self.
(17) I got little to nothing back for my efforts anyway.
(18) Alot of people were brought up with this idea of societies and inclusive communities.
(19) Sadly thats not the case for all of us.
(20) You can still be nice to randoms you met along the way though.
(21) Be happy you live in the time of internet
(22) Unlike growing up in the 70s and 80s...
(23) Being alone was a thousand times worse.....
I'm alone 24/7 no family no friends i can relate.
Sorry man, at least you know you are not alone in being alone, I will try to make more positive videos in future, thanks.
Finding true friends nowadays is nearly impossible For me anyway
I’m a 55 year old man who’s been alone nearly 8 years since my girlfriend left me. I totally love the quiet life. I go for regular walks have indoor hobbies which I get lost in for hours and hours. I find it’s all about mind set. Having something to occupy your mind besides TV is a big plus. Play your favourite music stay away from social media and fill your home with your own spirit and energy. Look for positives in being alone instead of beating yourself up because you are alone. Your home your life your decisions. It’s perfectly possible to find joy in the quiet moments. I beg of you to try and change your mindset and start looking outwards instead of inwards. Anything is possible but you have to want it. Enjoy the company of your dogs now while they are here rather than worrying about the time when they are not. This is all a waste if your precious time. You are an amazing human being just as you are. Find peace in just being you.
OMG I can’t watch this video. I got to 6.50 on the timer and I was tearing up. You described my life. It’s not easy Gerald. I think you need to count your blessings. I AM alone. I am a 58 year old female living in Sydney Australia. I have no husband. No boyfriend. No children. No parents. I nursed my parents for many years before they passed away. My friends slowly dropped by the wayside as our lives grew in different directions when I was caring for my beautiful parents and my responsibilities/utter exhaustion meant I could never meet up with them. I could get in contact with friends now but I have crippling anxiety and am battling with severe depression. The depression is improving (this video didn’t help me this morning!) but I can only think about one day at a time or I get overwhelmed. You will have to find purpose when you ARE actually alone. In the meantime Gerald stop obsessing and living in fear of it and embrace, nurture and relish in what you actually have. I was terrified but knew I had to make a difference in the world or indeed there really was no purpose of me being here. No one would miss me. No one would even know, I knew I’d prob be found years after my demise one of those terribly sad reports you hear about on the news about a skeleton found on the kitchen floor 10 years after passing away. But I wanted to live. So I got some formal (mostly) online training in looking after people with disabilities. I’ve been working in this field 5 years now and I get so much joy from my work. I make a difference. My life now has purpose. Things could always be worse. One day at a time Gerald. That’s all any of us can do.
Thankyou, I will make more positive videos in time
@@gerofiore9695 I truely hope you make more positive videos in time, for the simple reason that when you do, you’ll be seeing some beauty in life!
I hope you didn’t take my words as being critical towards you. I am a fan and I have always enjoyed your videos - mainly for your honesty. This was the first one I couldn’t watch to the end as it was just too confronting for me. I was stuck in a negative loop of thoughts for many years. I now have to watch out for triggers that I worry may bring that negativity back. To clear my head, (after my initial comment) I took a lovely walk to shake off my unease. Admired the beautiful blue sky, felt the cool crisp morning air on my face and in my lungs, listened to the birds, stopped at a nearby park to stare at the sunlight through a dew drop on a leaf (people who saw me prob thought “there’s a crazy one”!). On the way home i saw a perfectly formed spider’s web, totally covered in tiny dew drops sparkling in the sun’s rays, just miraculous beauty, breathtaking! And now I’m back home, having confirmed that life is beautiful… even though I am alone. It always was beautiful. I just couldn’t see it. Love and blessings dear man. ❤️
There is an easy solution, turn to God and learn about Him. Put your trust in God.
@@thomaskrousey4443 solution to what Thomas? Re God: perhaps I already have put my trust in him!
@@doddyseeswow your story writing skills felt like a great book and I didn’t want the reading to end. Stay Blessed beautiful soul🤍
59....dog died 27 days ago. Best friend died. Kids off doing their natural moving on. You darn right its scary. From mom and dad to marriage at 19. Looking around me trying to come up with Some one to team up with. Mentally struggling actually.
I’m a 59 year old man. Huge dog lover. Losing a dog is hell. I’m sorry for your loss! I feel so out of touch in this world. Nothing makes any sense anymore. It’s so hard to connect with people at our age! I hope you find someone to go through life as it sucks being alone.
Same luv
🙏🏻
@@naturerules3371 It can’t be stressed enough , if you’ve got a local leisure centre , join up . They’ve got sessions on for us oldies (over-50’s) constantly , whether it’s swimming , badminton , whatever . Of course the downside is you’ve got to go home at some point , but at least we’ve got the internet nowadays and there’s loads of online communities to keep your fingers busy
@@naturerules3371 your spot on. I hope you're pushing on everyday. I would describe this "out of touch" feeling as almost being caught in a weird episode of the twilight zone about time travel. I must have fallen asleep leaning against a tree and woke up to find people I knew aged and places I knew either torn down or turned into completely different things. On occasion I wake up from sleep and still look for my dog. Thanks for your comment....it reassures me I haven't gone mad.✌️
Hey bro, I hear you. I've been alone for the past eight years since my partner left. I have no children or family here in New Zealand. I have found the Holy Spirit to be my friend. Always there, always available to talk and listen to telepathically. I am not alone, I walk with God, I'm guided by His Holy Spirit. 👍🙏
You’re not alone . You have all your friends on here.
Thankyou
Gerald. I have had the most horrendous things happen in life. I can’t say here ! Most awful things a woman can experience. The other week my cat had 9 stillborn kittens ! I took my giant rabbit to be castrated; he had a heart attack & died ! My brother died this year of a brain tumour. All my best mates are dead & the other stuff is much worse !!!! Think what the future holds for you ! Look how well your Chanel is doing. You have so much to look forward too !! We all go through shit & worry ourselves sick about the future xx
I think I’d have a heart attack too
Probably said this before, but I've been separated now for almost 5 years. I have twin daughters who mean everything to me, but these past five years have been the most lonely and the most isolating. I live from one day to the next for my girls, but feel profoundly sad inside and depressed. When the girls are with their mother, I come home to silence and emptiness. It used to be that I'd come home to the sound of children playing and having fun. That's all gone. And like you, I watch On The Buses, then Minder, Rising Damp and the months and the years go by and I just get older. It's just an existence. I suppose I'm lucky that I got joint Custody, so I do have the girls with me quite a lot of the time. Not quite teenagers yet, but they will be one day. Then I will really be alone, as they make their own way in life. I want to change my life, but seem unable to. Like you, I'm stuck.
I hope you find compassion for yourself. 5 years is not long. Grieving can take years & years. ....
Tell your story 100 times, I'll still read and listen to your thoughts, you're a good bloke. And like myself watch those Rising Damp, O the buses, Man about the house hehe, I can really relate.
@user-fp8ov7lh8z
0 seconds ago
You need to make some new friends, and I'm talking to myself as well. Don't try and make friends randomly, use your imagination first, and then try - weirder things happen all the time.
I'm a 46 year old man and live alone and love the freedom I actually enjoy my alone life I feel very fortunate I also have a 24 year old son who I don't see regularly and do not have any other family who I'm in contact with I say enjoy it you will meet the right person when you go out to socialise I suggest groups hobbies and even to your local pub to meet people I hope this has helped a bit😊
People who have spent their constantly around others often end up in toxic relationships just to not be alone which does not equate to being lonely
Loneliness is a global epidemic. After I retired, I lost all my friends. It's very difficult to find friends when older.
loneliness is hard but i always say even being married you have to make and find ur own happiness . i’m alone a lot while my hubby travels i completely keep myself busy i stay on a schedule i go to the gym to workout . find a hobby that you enjoy . you have to love urself before you can love anyone else . i feel today that people depend on others way too much i don’t depend on anyone i make my own happiness and live life alone 50 percent of the time .
I was completely on my own for 15 years bringing up three children,they left home and I had a good social life,going to lots of music gigs. Met an amazing man and that was six years ago. Get yourself out there, music brings people together
I am convinced that your channel won't dry out as long as you are authentic. You speak about real humans challenges e.g. loneliness is a serious problem of our society. And apart of those you are exposing yourself, this is generous behaviour, I'm lonely and when I listen people like you ( although you're one unique) I feel connected and more happy, take care Gerald , maybe think about beautiful colours in your future place. About plants , painting, art
It´s totally normal for you to feel that way. It´s totally normal to feel the fear and the pain of realizing all of a sudden you´re all alone, there´s no one there anymore, and you are very much on your own. No one expecting you or calling you to see how you´re doing. What´s the point of living if there´s no one to share your life with? I´m going through precisely that at this point in my life. I´m 58 years old, never married for some reason or another, I spent almost my entire life living close to or with my parents. I´ve been taking care of my mother for the last 25 years and it turns out, she´s the only person in the world I have any connection with. I have no girlfriend, no friends, no real connections with anyone. I do have two sisters and a brother who I rarely speak to. So, one day, this is back in 2017, my Mom went on a trip to visit one of my sisters in Atlanta - I was going to spend Xmas alone in the house in Mexico. Didn´t make too much of it at first, but then something happened. I got home, the house was empty, it was total silence, and it just wasn´t "my home" any more. It was a just a house, and I felt so so lonely and terrified of my future when my Mom is no longer in this world with me. What´s going to happen to me? What will be the point of living if there is no one to share my days or my life with? Eventually my Mom came back, and things went back to normal. But, every once in a while I rememeber that day when I just broke down in my car and didn´t want to open the door to go into that house again. You should know that life goes on, with or without your loved ones. It´s normal to feel fearful and terrified - but it´s all up to you. You have to become your own best friend and have fun. I started a foundation and I rescue abandoned and mistreated dogs, I have 30 dogs at this moment. That has helped me a lot to cope with loneliness. I´ve met a lot of people that do similar things - just seeing my puppies in the morning and walking them every day makes me very happy. I also have a number of activities, I´m learning languages among other things. Try to have as much fun as possible - don´t allow thoughts and negative emotions take control of your life - emotions are your enemy and your worst nightmare if you don´t keep them in check. God bless you and best wishes to you.
How wonderful you started the foundation. 😊
I’m 64 and just had a baby with my Thai wife of 14 years and loving it. If you really want to find a companion then come to Thailand and make a fresh start! You can totally reinvent yourself here and live very affordably. Just be very choosy if you do and understand it’s a different world here and so are the women. That said they are amazing mates if you find the right one (not at a bar) The other option is to look at the freedom you now have as a great opportunity! The world is your oyster! You can go anywhere and see anything you want. It’s the ultimate You Time! What you have is peace - not loneliness! How lucky you are! It’s all about your attitude. Your life is what you make it and nothing else. You’re alive to live- not to worry and waste away. We got to be happy in our own skins first and being a single older guy comes with a lot of potential for amazing experiences. But only you can make the choice.
Well done on becoming a dad. I heard Thai women are often out to take loads of money from a western man, and that it is financially very costly being in a long-term relationship with one! I find that a bit sad if it's true, what's your take on this ?
@@patrickmurf8743 Thats what I would worry about, choosing the wrong one
As a Irishman living in Australia, the hardest thing I had to overcome was lonelyness, it's very hard , it's takes a long time to overcome. Good luck .
I'm the same age as you and used to think that way but don't feel your on your own it's a part of life unfortunately you have all of us to keep you company sending warm vibes from Ireland ✨🕊️☘️
Hi Gerald👋🏻..Don’t ever feel you are alone, lots of people are happy to chat 👋🏻😀
You have to be strong brother. You have more guts than me..i couldn't put myself out there like you have.
Been on my own for 13 years. 43 no kids.
♥️👏
Do you have a faith? You can find a community at church.
Yes agree
Great idea
It may feel like that at first but that is the opportunity to discover yourself and who you really are as opposed to being a co dependant and not knowing yourself without others there.
I went through divorce in the UK, lived on my own for 9 years, had my dog for company for 7 of those years and then his life came to an end. I had tried the dating game for a while during those 9 years but gave it up as a lost cause, it was a joke. So when my dog went I thought what do I do now, do I just sit here with my head in my hands every day, dreading the long cold winters. At age 62 I decided the UK had nothing to offer me so I made a big and bold decision, I decided to leave the country and make a new life for myself. My destination was the Philippines, that was 15 years ago, my life has been rejuvenated, I am re-married to a beautiful filipina, the sun shines almost every day, the people here are very friendly and I haven't been cold in all those years. Don't sit there complaining about life if you are in a position to do something about it, get off your backside and make things happen for you, fortune favours the brave. I have no regrets about my decision, my new life is going very well..
Om 67 now suffered lonliness and insomnia all my life, its hard.
Lonliness is soooo painfull.
I have a strong christian faith and it really helps me.
God bless💖
You are not alone, i feel exactly the same way after my mum & dad died and after 2 failed relationships. Its something im STILL working on, stay strong & take care.
I'm there already.. for a year. Alone everyday at home, time flies...daughter gone ,married..when they go you hardly see them, they have their own lives to live now. Dogs died, just me..internet and a spliff helps me sleep and avoids reality a little..avoid medication like the plague.
I forgot what spliff is like, sorry for your loss mate, you sound like a good bloke, ever thought about heading to Thailand or Phillipines?
i think its so fair how they just move on with no empathy at all.
@@gerofiore9695 I moved to cape town SA near the beach..wont return to the UK if i can help it.
@@gerofiore9695 It's 23 pound to 1 SA rand. You can live well out here if you have pounds.
@@jacksonbollocks Is South Africa safer than England...?
My mother & best friend are not going to be around for much longer, but I’m trying to enjoy the moment with them & life in general “ that’s all we’ve got - The past is already gone, the future is not yet here, there is only one moment for you to live , and that is in the present moment.
Just know your are not alone .. I am going thru the same situation I think we all need to do a support group. .
Always good to watch your channel, very supportive to folks watching your channel, I am sure you are helping others for ✔️ sure, keep the faith I am sure your channel will open doors for you all the best to you and your family including your dogs 🐕✅👍⭐️
Lastly, but more to mention but I guess I will stop. Both my parents died from Dementia, my mother the end of Mar of this year 2024, My father 3 yrs before. I still have a sick sister who has been in a home since 4 years old, who's list of things wrong I cannot count or pronounce. Abandonment is another thing I have experienced very much in my life as well, my stepmother for one, when my father died she vanished into thin air, like a ghost. Not surprised, I always seen this coming and saw the detachment from day one. Always disagreed with every last solitary word I ever said. The only reason she ever called me was if she needed something from me only. Something I could do for her only. As you can see you are not alone, no pun intended, I think we all have our hard to bear stories.
Yes I'm all alone, i love cats and dogs but i do not want to experience their death, no pets for me or girlfriends.
Gerald. I'm 59 and can't hold onto a relationship. I got my Aggy, Siberian Husky. Life is beautiful. And I have made friends with other dog owners.
On another point, I recently learnt how I'm such a people pleaser and was always seeking validation. I couldn't get enough. Deep issues from childhood.
Anyways, I then watched some great youtube vids on how not to 'need' validation. Really helping in all aspects.
Also diet is 86% of the problem.
Get an African grey parrot, that's what I did. They are great company, funny and very talkative. A friend for life.
I think your smoke alarm needs a new battery 😎
I think so by the amount of ppl mentioning it, will have to get one, I have not noticed it and its been faulty for years
How can you trust a man who is negligent in not having a functioning fire alarm? Think of your daughters & dogs please, get it working ASAP
I suffer from depression, and your video's cheer me up 😊
Hi Gerald
Thank you for sharing your stories . I enjoy checking in with you . Loneliness can be a tricky thing to deal with, so I really get what you are saying . 🙏
I chose to be alone. And recently cut off family too. I only stay in contact with ppl who I can trust and are loyal.
Been betrayed so many times I'm red raw from the knives in my back.
But I have hobbies. Interests. And pets.
At 55 I'm starting a small business and YT channel too.
Being alone means. Putting yourself first.
Not wasting your time and energy on others.
Focus on yourself and give yourself goals.
Once you get used to being alone you don't want anyone to come along and disturb your tranquility.
14 yrs I chose celibacy
My body is my own also.
So much benefits to it. Look at it as a positive not a negative.
I now see married couples and glad I'm not tied to anyone.
No compromising. No drama. No answering to anyone but yourself.
I love it. 😁
Solitude is a strange thing,, it does funny things to your mind, you start to wonder why you always crave for entertainment,, or a subject to entertain you,, when the reality it's about how you deal with the passing of time in your head. How you relax and deal with that.. We do anything to avoid that solitude but it's the one thing you need to face in life to become wise.. Also facing solitude with no way out is on another level. Great conversation mate... 👍
Try being alone. I never thought I could do it - it takes getting used to it but now I love my own company. There is a difference between alone and lonely. I was in a 25 yr old marriage and never felt so lonely as u was at that time. You need to build the most important relationship you will ever have - with yourself. I’ve watched a few of your videos and I don’t think it will be as bad as you think.
Charlotte, that an interesting comment, you may be right
Life is so difficult at times....I feel your pain also maybe we can meet 4 coffee some time to chat....
Yes, maybe
You may not think so but your chats give hope to others by just being authentic….you discuss real issues genuinely 🙏
Takes a good while to be comfortable alone but defo gets easier 🎉🎉
My advice is get a really nice dog, like a Labrador, I'm 50 and was lonely and I got a blond Labrador and we do everything together she is without a doubt the most important thing in my life and you build such a incredible bond with them I dont know what I'd do without her..
I'm also 57 and I often worry about loneliness if I lose my partner or friends. I lost two friends to cancer and as you get older the loss doesn't get less. But you have two options, you either engage with society and new people or you don't. And if you feel lonely within four walls then the ultimate answer to that would be to share a property with someone else. It's easy for me to say this, but like most things in life it's harder to do.
You may well be 57 but you still have a journey ahead of you. x
Get a little place with a roommate? Share a place with others? Volunteer to keep busy and meet people. You have many talents to share. So many of us in the world are alone and lonely. It is hard, but it forces us to grow and take care of our lives. As you get stronger you might feel more comfortable inviting others to your home to hang out. It isn't our kids burden to be our best friends. It will just make them feel sad and burdened by you. As hard as life is, we have to take responsibility for ourselves. No parents, women, or children will rescue you (us). I say this with love although I know you do not want to hear anyone's advice. I also have extreme social anxiety, depression and learning disabilities. I have always worked and taken care and responsibility for myself...how? Because I had to..no one to take care of me financially, etc. You would be surprised what you are capable of when you have to. You will learn and grow and have gratitude for so many little things. You will gain self respect and your children will be proud of you. ❤❤❤ With love
❤❤❤❤
I remember a date back in December 25 2014, probably one of the worst dates in my life. My common-law spouse left me and tried to suck money out of me through the legal system, and make me look bad on top of that, I phoned my son who badmouthed me so bad I could not listen any further, and totally out of the blue, he went on and on and took his time badmouthing me, I got a call from my stepmother who told me my father had dementia and needed me to come from Ontario to BC. I was all alone as well, no friends to call on, I also had to go through the process of a long drive and leave to go to BC, lots of plans for the moving process all on Christmas eve. How is that for the holiday spirit? We all have our stories, all we can do is hope it changes for the better at some point.
I’ve always liked my own company and don’t mind being alone, even through having 3 children and relationships. As my children have grown older and 2 moved on, I find myself single and I felt the pang of loneliness and also a sense of purpose missing. My advice would be don’t be afraid of being alone and to go there experience it and explore what comes up for you. For me never really putting energy into my self care as I was busy caring for so many others, it’s great having the time and energy to get to know and invest in
myself. It’s a sign of good parenting that your kids are independent. It sounds like you may have co dependence issues to explore. We all are a work in progress 🙏
Get a battery for your smoke alarm. That's what the "cheep" is every minute or so.
The UK has lost the idea of family values. Loneliness is the result. Compare this with Asian and Muslims in the UK. Their children maintain their connections with their parents and they are respected and honoured in their communities.
Loads of us fall asleep watching vids or on social media, your children are still young. You’ll spend time on social media, listen to music, read, housework, gardening, cooking, phone calls etc. and having a big bed to yourself is fine too. Think of the people who have lost their partners through death. I have a son but he is married and lives in Greece. I spend weeks and weeks if not months without seeing anyone and it’s ok. Really, don’t think about it now, it’s too overwhelming for you, it’s a gradual process anyway, it won’t all happen at once sweetie xxx
Yes. It’s a lonely world. We even must consider our own mortality.
I consider it nearly everyday and I’m only 70
I must be strange, I can’t be around people all the time…..love my alone time.
Lonely, all the time and worried. I didn’t expect all the human beings that I gathered to just leave me
You are not alone.Lost many things along the way.The truth will set us free. Fishing, by the waters.God Bless You
i wisjh you all the luck in the world gerald its hard but you got it
Maybe you're having trouble sleeping due to the smoke alarm chirping. I couldn't put up with that, would drive me crazy
@@yayyay3060 You guys wont believe this but Ive never realised, once you get used to it you don't hear it any longer, that's amazing, ok will get one, hehe
Washing tue dishes over here.
You must try and master loneliness. It can be so amazing.
Back to my dishes.
😂😂😂
Mate, I can empathise but I really think you need a job. You spend alot of time getting into your own head, thinking negative thoughts. You’ve got too much time on your hands. You need a purpose, a reason for living beyond family and your dogs. I’m flat out working 8 hours minimum Mon to Fri- less time to think about the fact I’m 47, still single, have no kids or close family or dwell on my empty meaningless life. Flip the negative thinking around into a positive- you have kids, lots of people want them but haven’t been able to - for what ever reason. You have a wife, experienced love - giving and receiving it. Beautiful dogs who you love dearly. Snap out of it - you need to switch things up. It’s a mindset.
Yep I'm 53. Life takes things away and the only one that understands is OTHER people in their 50s 60s
Poor you. Thank you for reaching out. I love you.
Thankyou
How nice that you appreciate people so much that you are lonely without them.
I remember at age 10 sitting in the back seat with my two other sisters, Mom and baby in the front, Dad driving us home from vacation. Driving on the interstate - I’d feel such sadness over all the dilapidated old vacated barns. Derelict farm equipment abandoned in the field of overgrown grass and weeds. Nothing lasting and all disintegrating. I new then and there someday I’d be alone and my family would end. Fast forward 45 years here I am - now my husband’s gone. I struggle everyday.
The brutal truth is that no one will save you. You HAVE to get out there and connect. You HAVE to make the effort. Doing these videos, for example, is an excellent thing. You made this channel happen, and you can make a new social life happen as well. Life is constant change. People come and go, and no relationship, not even with your mum or your child, is permanent. But you’ve got a lot going for you. You’re a very likeable, kind, warm human being. You’ll have no trouble meeting new people. You said in a previous video that you used to like art. Adult colleges often run free art classes. My advice would be to join them, take up drawing and painting, and talk to the other students. Keep trying, over and over, until you find your people. You’re clearly a sensitive, arty sort of guy, and you need to be around sensitive, arty people. The key is sharing a common interest.
There is a time of year when loneliness really hits home, it is the time between Christmas and the new year,, years ago when I lived at home, the family next door had two teenagers they were around 17/18 years of age, the younger sister was always out with boyfriends but the older sister
always stayed at home and rarely went out, she was also less attractive than her sister, anyway on New Years eve, the older sister went for a walk and jumped off the top of a tower block, I wish I had spoken to her more often when she was alive, but I did not and always ignored her, not on purpose, it is just the way things were, this was 40 years ago in south London, Forest Hill and now and again, I think about how lonely she must have been
your thought process is creating hell for you
BEING ALONE CAN BE SCARY AT TIMES BUT SOLITUDE IS ALSO A WONDERFUL WAY TO GET TO KNOW YOURSELF AND NOT BE DISTRACTED WITH CHAOS AND STRESS THAT PEOPLE CAN BRING THAT IS WHY SHE IS YOUR EX I HAVE BEEN ALONE FOR YEARS AND I AM BEGINNING TO LOVE IT SO IF SOMEONE ENTERS MY LIFE THEY MUST BE GOOD FOR ME OR THEY MUST GO AND IM ALONE YES BUT IM NOT LONELY A LOT JUST SOMETIMES WE MUST STILL LOOK FOR LOVE AND JOY 🙏🏿
I'm facing this soon, part of me is looking forward to the alone time. Not having to please other people, not having to do anything if I don't want.
It's just the longevity that's a bit daunting.
This is the reason i refuse to let my peace, calm, happiness and purpose come from other people.....
Hello Gerald. As a 53 year old woman, I suggest you start going to latin dancing classes. There are usually more women than men for a start to pick from as a dance partner. You will have fun, the latin music is lively, salsa dancing in particular is of happy sounding music and you will meet like-minded people who are open to other cultures whilst having fun. You would make friends there and possibly find yourself a woman of your own. Finding such new friends and possibly a forever dance partner, your woman will mean you will never have loneliness.
If I lived where you live (I live in Australia) I would be your latin dancing partner if you would have liked me to be. I would have liked to be your friend and possibly even your woman if we were compatible. You would not feel loneliness if I was your woman.
hey Gerald, I feel you but all that negative thinking won't get you anywhere my friend, you can't stop time from passing and things changing. Embrace what time you got left and make the most out of it. You will still be able to see your kids in the future, and maybe you will have new pets when you are older. You can always meet a new woman as well, never give up. I'v been alone for a long time, I stopped struggling with loneliness the day I decided to respect and take care of myself.
Thanks
You have to learn to be your own best friend. Find something you're passionate about, but don't dwell on yourself and being alone. We're all alone to some extent.
Making new friends is as bad as dating. I keep finding people distrusting of ME but taking my trust for granted. Its like new ones come along then disappear and none stay. Dont see this new space as dead. It is a free space where u can delve deep into your interests, eat sleep and wash in a non threatening relaxed space. Keep it clean and calm and peace will follow, it took me a good five months.
How are you getting on with your ribbon dancing?
@@chrisstones3488 yesterday noticed progress stretching my back and seeing some muscle develop, then got a reply from the uk champion on instagram because id been commenting on her videos. I was so overwhelmed, really motivated me to practice more and eat better! 🤩
hi gerald i listen to your story of your life i know how you feel i lost my long term partner after 45 years ,my mother lost my father when i was 12 and lived alone since then .how im dealing with it gerald im out there doing things different now camping fishing being into nature and meeting new people life is great
Your not alone you will have a big following keep up the vids!!!
I also have this loneliness problem. No one seems to want me, romantically or for friendship and it seems people only contact me when they want something. I usually end up going to a bar and bingeing now and again for an escape or just to talk to people, although I don't recommend alcohol/drugs at all for this. Gyms for me are Very lonely, the most lonely of places. Most of the guys in one I go to are much younger and I have no interest in talking to them. I had a couple of very good online pen-pals, and it did help me at the time, but alas! It could be helpful for you too to have someone u can text regularly perhaps.
We came to the world 🌎 alone and leave the world 🌎 alone so beware don't get attached too much with anyone who u don't love ..
Real Talk:
Um, sir, at age 57, I suggest you get busy counting your blessings and start enjoying your OWN company!
The clock… is ticking. 🙃
♥️
I prefer being on my own if honest. I have lots of hobbies and stuff to occupy my mind. That's what you need.
Gerald, I know what you mean, loneliness hurts…. I’m newly divorced, separated for years. I do lots to keep me occupied but nights are worse
Being alone can be a gift or a darkness. I’m states away from my family. I miss them, of course, however….. I enjoy living alone. Loneliness is different from living alone. Guess it’s a personality type. I’ve always enjoyed private time.