our biggest flaws | shawn johnson + andrew east
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- Опубліковано 6 вер 2022
- In this episode we talked openly about something nobody wants to talk about…our biggest flaws. We also talked about each other’s biggest flaws and let’s just say things got interesting. We hope this inspires you to be open and transparent with yourself and your spouse so your relationship can reach its full potential and be the best it can be!
What are your biggest flaws? Let us know in the comments!
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Hi East Family, I just wanted to bring your attention to the fact that Obsessive Compulsive Disorder is a mental illness characterized by agonizing fears and intrusive thoughts (the obsessions) that lead you to do repetitive behaviors (the compulsions) with the hope of preventing those fears and intrusive thoughts from occurring in the real world. Unfortunately, somewhere along the line, OCD became incorrectly conflated with orderliness, perfectionism, and being very tidy. It actually is a truly debilitating illness that can take over your mind and life and prevent you from functioning and performing activities of daily living. There are hospitals with dedicated programs to help those with OCD where the treatment is Exposure and Response Prevention therapy - essentially you have to do/say the things you are so afraid of and then not do the compulsions. Without this treatment, I would still be retracing my steps until I had no scary thoughts (which was never) or getting stuck in a loop of safe words for an hour until I was able to do the next task, and much more. I just wanted you to know because I think hearing OCD used incorrectly keeps some of those who suffer or have suffered with it silent because people do not understand what it truly looks like. Wishing you and your family happiness, you two were meant for each other 💖
If the day ever comes where you and your audience would find value on having senior couples on your channel, I volunteer my husband and I. We are approcahing 75, this is a 3rd marriage of 22 years and boy oh boy do we have stories to share! We are pretty funny we think and not shy about sharing everything.
I'd enjoy watching. 😊
I loved this. Seriously, hearing how you guys communicate makes me feel like my marriage isn’t all that weird. I relate so much to everything you guys talk about. Thank you for normalizing millennial marriage ups and downs ❤
Watching this episode made me realize how normal my relationship is with my husband. We are just Iike you both! Thank you for sharing this!
Should not there also be a time to recognize the strengths of your partner?
You gouys are the sweetest! Love Andrews way of talking and expressing his thoughts and saw that his brother has the same gift in the video about their dads funeral. Such a lovely family❤ Makes one aim to be more like them, better❤
I do think memories with your kids is more important like riding bikes with the kids. Rather than having the kitchen clean. Everything always being clean and tidy isn't important
Thank you East Family, for being amazing and for making a difference in my life and others. For your time, energy and compassion. Iam married, have one son and can relate sooo much with your podcast. Thank you for using your gifts to help others. Blessings to your Family.
This is one of my favorites you’ve done! Very valuable!
My husband and I have been married 21 years and similar issues still come up here and there, so you guys are definitely not alone. Thank you, by the way, for the therapy tips you all threw in there! I think even after many years of marriage we all go through our individual ups and downs that the marriage is always evolving. Your ideas of check ins is actually something I’d like my husband and I to try. Great episode!
This. One. Hit. HARD. “I am a perfectionist and I set the bar away way too high on expectations for myself …when it comes to our marriage if I don’t ever live up to that expectation that I’ve set for myself I take it out on E v e r y b o d y.”
I feel like I was afraid to admit fault in this and now jotting this down for myself to discuss in therapy this week.
I’m sure I could edit throughout this entire episode but, edit: when Andrew said something about expending energy on so much other things then Shawn Last. Oh broke in tears. Shawn said it hurt her soul and I felt that pain too.
“Use the pronoun I “. Andrew, I feel attacked! 😂
Now that I’m back at college I’ve gotten back into the habit of listening to your podcast in the mornings :)) love you guys ❤️
Thank you both for this! My husband and I have been married 3 years and we implemented monthly checkins since 2020 because of hearing you two share about it. It’s honestly helped shift our intentionality and continually helping us grow. You all bring up some key points of contention in marriage and it’s such a gift to glean from a couple who is ahead of us and constantly learning too. Really appreciate you both sharing your struggles and celebrating marriage 🤟🏼
You guys are so awesome !!! Thank you for your transparency and willingness to share !! This is healthy and so relevant to my life and the lives of so many I am sure! I love you guys and feel like you guys are such an awesome example of a real couple using healthy boundaries and being vulnerable with each other! Thank you!
You all are open to your lives and I’m sure you are helping many other couples that Don’t know how to communicate with each other. So Thank You Both for all your wisdom
Loved this episode! It's so true that within different seasons of marriage the qualities of our spouses that drew us to them can also become a source of contention. Loved the idea of trying to "compromise and not change" them!
Also...I can't be the only one curious about what Andrew would say his reason is for not wearing deodorant all the time lol 😅😅 Love you guys and I respect your marriage a lot!! Thanks for being so real!!!!!!!
Thank you so much! I needed this more than I thought I did
same!
This is very real you two! I definitely can relate to this and I am 50 and my hubby of 18 yrs is 42. We have the same arguments and tribulations. Omg y’all are normal lol 😂 seriously we all have some things we need to work on. There is NO perfect marriage. It’s all in communication but even then it’s not going to ever be perfect. It’s a constant work at it relationship/marriage. If both live each other and are dedicated to their marriage you will work in it. It may not always be perfect conversations but it’s the conversations that are needed and to know that the other person is there and communicating is far better than one walking out n the marriage over frustration and nit wanting to out in the effort. Just know what your end goal is going to be and be accepting of it.
I love the rawness and truth you guys share, inspires me to be a better wife and friend ❤
As humans we're all flawed and when it comes to life issues whatever it might be mostly to a loved one we tend to overthink things with our head first and not our heart. I'm not saying we shouldn't use our head, but we can't lead with it always or we'll lose perspective of why we are together and what we loved about each other first. This is just a speed bump along life's journey together. Blessings!
Great show...I've been married for forty three years. I love being married. We have had some big arguments thru the years
Wow! Your commitment to working things out is impressive. A counselor once told me....don't use words like never, always, should, ought, etc. It's hard!
Sorry...keep giving unwarranted comments. I have 2 young men in their early 20s and they were 14 months apart. Looking back, it helps to focus on seasons. The season you're in right now, the house being tidy is impossible, but this is just a season.
Marriage is hard and after 25 years, it’s still hard😂
I recognize communication issues with my marriage but as a typical guy- he refuses to go to marriage counseling. When I started self reflecting that’s when the change in me happened, can’t say the same for my spouse . But because of my faith, I will continue to pray for him and us. God has been my therapist 😁 But marriage is definitely a lifetime of “effort” and you just don’t quit when the going gets tough!
Above all, we humans need to give each other so much grace!
Love it! I'm freaking Shawn. So just out of curiosity. How do you guys, decide on chores, house , yard, kids work.
Very insightful. Real life stuff...sometimes you need to see it for you to understand.
Hopefully, we will make it through the talk. Will let you know how it ended lol😊
Just remember give you selves you own space. How do qualify that statment my wife have had our 53rd wedding anniversary .you fight you ague you get over it and on with life. xx :) ❤ Merry Christmas and get on with life.Happy New Year .
We have been married for almost 24 years. (2nd marriage).... so trust me, I've been where you are. In the early years I think we've all been where you are.... the lack of communication, the stubbornness, the maturity, the newness of it all (kids, life) builds huge riffs that are sometimes unsurmountable. We all know how to 'behave' correctly..... with maturity comes understanding. AND, we learn that life is full of "things", most of which we take too seriously. Pick your battles... battle ONLY about the things that have the most importance and learn to let the rest roll off of you. For example... is it THAT important to have a clean house/kitchen in comparison to spending more time with the kids? Do you need to argue about something like that? Thanks for delving into all of this. I just hope you learn along the way. AND btw.. it would be interesting to know which one of you decided to do this subject "for public consumption'. I'm guessing Shawn. Could be totally wrong about that.
I typically listen to your podcast on Apple Podcasts. I can't find the episode you guys are talking about with your biggest fights?! Where is that at?
Did that honestly go the way you thought it would??
Freakin Shawn cracked me up😂
Part of fixing it is putting the support and love in first and the issue second. Shaun should just get a maid to help if Andrew won't or go on bike rides with Drew, too, and let Andrew live with the messy, until he decides to help.
This was great!!! Hang in and laugh together more often!!! Trust in Jesus and just take it day by day!! Marriage and family are the hardest yet best things this side of heaven❤️❤️❤️
The standoff about being stubborn had me dying!!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
this was wild
Here for the solid two minutes of laughter following “I think I’m a good communicator”
There is something about sharing lots of personal information that feels like a cheap way to make money to me.. Like some people go to School and get degrees and while I know both these people are well accomplished... Idk if I like that they do this as a form of making money.. Feels almost immoral or .. exploitive of their relationship .
My mom would call that a ‘lemon party’ 🍋
Question for Shawn: We often hear you say "I'm so OCD." Were you officially diagnosed with OCD? If not, as a clinical therapist, I feel that many of us would appreciate if you stopped saying “I’m so OCD." The disorder is not an adjective, and it’s legitimate. When people use it so flippantly, it tends to delegitimize the actual diagnosis/ disorder.
If she was diagnosed with an ED id say it’s pretty legitimate to say she also was also for OCD. Typically they go hand in hand for many individuals. HOWEVER…I’ve yet to hear her say she was diagnosed at all. I agree when you say “it de legitimizes the issue when used so flippantly” same with eating disorders.
Relax
I’ve commented on this before and sadly haven’t had a response. Also sadly I have definitely had the same style user comment telling me to relax/calm down. Some people don’t want to change their opinions on things - but disappointing from these guys as they do make a point of saying they want to learn and adapt.
@@yandleful you probably won’t ever get one. Criticism is often avoided by humans on a platform. I love Shawn and Andrew but they ask for interaction but never give it back/respond to it. Consider yourself a muted viewer.
The issue at the end where Andrew wants to fix it and you want it to be sympathetic and empathetic is because of the age all Woman are from Venus and Men are from Mars kinda thing. Men always want to fix things and go straight at it.Woman always want to go deep into gentle and loving explorative communication. Discussing every nuance of our thoughts and feelings. It’s learning how to understand the differences and navigating through it all. As a Christian woman in her 50’s and having parents who are almost 80, we are still trying to perfect it. Lol! 😂
Constantly trying to better yourself . . . Nice.
Usually issues are sometimes feels unacceptable for Who God made us to be.
Maybe adding "dude" needs to go 😄😄🤣🤣
I❤️you both!!
I also put garbage in the sink 😬
Got evil eye
You focused on each others flaws rather than taking accountability for your own. At the end you were being critical and nit-picking each other. Typically in self-help when we talk about our "flaws" we are looking at our deeper thoughts and behaviors that cause harm to ourselves or others.
Love y’all but the highs and lows of your talking volume drives me bonkers. I listen while driving so it makes it worse. Still gonna listen though. Andrew gets super quiet/low then Shawn gets really loud. 😊