Kinda did't even notice. About the vid tho... Allow me to head into a bit of a long reasoning. Let's say that for the last 2 or 3 years life's been hard on me, new school, couple of difficult breakups (because i'm consistant and it's rather hard for me to disattach from a partner), almost got kicked out of school because of a long and periodicаlly dumb story . Or so i thought. The thing is, i took about 2 weeks to think, reconsider a couple of moments and now... well, it's probably obvious that i was making it harder myself. Used to blame everything but myself and wondering why there was no changes what so ever The reason why i'm saying this is because at that point a few of your videos pushed me to reconsider my looks on life. So yeah, the things you said are 100% true
Usually if a girl likes you yall just click. It’s harder to get her to stop talking to u than to get her to talk to you. Don’t pretend to be something ur not for a girl who won’t even treat you right. Keep ur head up.
Not necessarily. I’ve had girls who outwardly expressed interest in me by constantly talking to me and doing things for me, but i’ve also had girls who liked me but we never talked on the phone never texted left me on open and didnt show much interest at all. Or sometimes girls will joke around with you how friends do but the whole time they liked you. It depends on the girl
The best way not to be in the friend zone is simply change your approach to dating in general. Make your intentions clear when meeting a girl early on if youre interested in her or not. If she isnt interested, move on and you won't be clouded with emotions if she rejects. Don’t settle for 'friendship' if shes not interested either, hoping you can change her mind, or will just accept anything just to be in contact with her. If it's too late for that, just cut contact. Being around someone you're interested in who doesnt feel the same back isn’t healthy. So cut them off and learn from your mistakes. I stopped the idea of being "friendly" when I was 18. Haven't had this issue since.
@@CarlMarxPunk i didn't watched the video but isn't someone that's not romantically interested for quite literally many varying reasons just keeping you in the friend-status and you're just obsessed with that person romantically, essentially just hurting youself? You just hadn't initially processed their thought process and got addicted to the idea something romantic might work out with them if you stick around and can't even even grieve that it likely might not happen if you take a disgusting amount of time to develop anything romantic with them
I can personally agree on his case. I had a crush, we were great friends and when I asked her out she just didn't like me back like that. We became even better friends, and I moved on and dated 2 other people. She eventually came back around and my friend told me that my former crush liked me, so I spoke to her and it didn't work out. It will be fine kings, if she rejects you surround yourself with friends, family, and maybe potential lovers ;)
@@Rizzal169 to move on, we weren't really clicking relationship wise, I should prob make an edit to this comment to clarify but basically we just weren't rlly compatible, we both recognized it. After I asked her out before she liked me I moved on fully. She eventually came around but sometimes if she doesn't like you back maybe you guys shouldn't get together. That's what I was communicating there
@@SwordSaint_Y if by took it you mean accepted, yea, but we weren't clicking after a while ad thought it was best to split. We are still rlly good friends
Also, i feel like not paying mind to/not believing in the friendzone is an integral part of being able to keep a friendship after being interested in someone. If you dont take things personally and dont try to chase them, then its much more likely that you can preserve the friendship yall have if you can simply move on.
@@frankkennedy6388 imo it's only really awkward if you let it be. if the two of you still value each other in a platonic way, then its still possible to preserve the friendship if it's worth it in the first place. about feelings creeping up, I think that just comes with time
@@frankkennedy6388 its not awkward as long as the two of you can still value each other as platonic friends. I think the awkard thing comes in if you never saw the person as anything platonic and saw them as a love interest from the get go.
I mean if you have feelings for someone then it’s not really a friendship is it? You wanted more and you’re just settling for a platonic relationship. Best you move on completely tbh
I've heard countless women admit to stringing along men that they weren't interested in. Even a coworker in her 60s admitted to it. It's nothing new, and people who deny it are either naive or gaslighting. That said, men shouldn't pursue women under the guise of friendship. It's deceitful towards women and will only prolong the discomfort you experience. Either be a genuine platonic friend or move on altogether, but please don't be an orbiter. For your own dignity if nothing else.
yup! all people regardless of gender can be deceitful and manipulative, and if any of us were to deny it we should really think a little longer and harder about our own actions. the best we can hope for is to give our very best effort to be kind and genuine to everybody we meet without expectations of favors or thanks.
to be fair there are cases when someone is not interested in a girl, but the day to day interaction makes the guy fall for her, it happened to me once when I was young, not my type, , she started seeking me and wanting to do things together, called me at home, etc, when I noticed I had fallen for her and thats when everything went south lol. The problem I see is people only talk about men approaching women in a deceiving way, but sometimes is more complicated, in this case I would not have initiated the interactions and it was only after said interactions that I fell for her.
Ok... But is it possible to be an orbiter AND a genuine platonic friend? Like, you genuinely enjoy just being their friend but you also wouldn't mind if it turned into something more? Sorry, I could be completely out of line, I just feel like as a guy it's hard to see someone just as a platonic friend if they're single and you also find them cute/attractive.
The friendzone just demonstrates the danger of naming something or diagnosing a problem. The easiest way out of the friendzone is to stop saying that you’re in the friendzone.
Had to realize this the hard way when I legit accepted the friendzone label, and then the girl who was my “friend” ended up ghosting me anyways. She actually did me a favor in doing that rather than stringing me along, but it’s a legit game changer when you realize if you or her made shit too awkward, go try again with someone else and don’t make the same mistakes.
This has changed my entire outlook on the topic. I guess the mental aspect of it is the hardest part to get through, considering many of us have been in the "friendzone" for a while, without truly knowing that it is a mentality that is holding you captive.This is some good stuff man. Thank you
Never force yourself to be friends with someone in the hopes of being something more later on. Be friends with those who you are genuinely interested in being friends with. Otherwise you are lying to yourself and to the other person and it will ultimately likely lead to resentment down the road. Resentment towards them for not giving you what you want and resentment towards yourself for allowing yourself to waste your and their time when you could have been pursuing people who were genuinely interested in you or spending time doing the things you actually wanted to do.
A good way to say what was trying to be said at the beginning is that the friendzone is something you put yourself in with a person you're romantically and/or sexually interested in. You trap yourself in this zone of trying to get someone who doesn't like you for who you are already. You shouldn't have to change yourself for a person. You should change yourself if you got problems that need to be fixed but that's self improvement. Self adjustment is what people do in the friendzone. They try to change themselves in various ways to seem more attractive to a person that isn't already interested in them like that. You shouldn't have to adjust yourself for someone you want romantically or in any way. You should be yourself and if you yourself isn't good enough for them then get out of the friendzone. To be in it is to imprison yourself. You should leave that person behind as just a friend and find someone else that does like you for who you are. When you put yourself in the friendzone you think of it as a stage or level you have to beat to get to the next level or stage in the relationship. But if you don't see it that way anymore then you'll just be friends. Maybe become good friends or best friends. But that's just a variation of a friend. You'll still be in the same "zone" but there is no zones if there's only one. You're just friends, good friends, or best friends. No need to categorize it with zones. If someone ain't interested in you in that way then find someone else who you like that is. There's bound to be a person in the world for another person in the world. And I don't recommend looking for them. When the time comes. You'll find them. And they'll find you. After that you can see if it works and if it doesn't then don't hold onto that feeling and trap yourself. Let it go and accept they don't want you that way. If it does work then congratulations. Have good communication and you should find yourself happy. If the time ever comes to let that person go. Then do it. To stay and delay the inevitable breakup is like the friendzone. A prison of your own making and something that needs to end for you to flourish. Like how Morty became better when he left his feelings for Jessica. You will too if you leave a doomed relationship or a friendzone of your making. Maybe it'll be hard in the beginning. But eventually you'll be better off for it. Just make sure when you become aware of it you end it off immediately in an appropriate manor. Or you'll ache from knowing the inevitable and may regret how it ended
In my mind, the friend zone is when you confess your feeling and they say something like "I think of us just as friends". That's the friend zone, but you can move on to live a life with joy from something other than her. In conclusion, the friend zone exists, but you're not stuck in it because you can move on and get out of the friend zone, just not in the way you originally would have wanted it to be.
This is so real. I had a crush on someone who friendzoned me hard and it fuckin destroyed me, I did stuff I’m not proud of and behaved like a different person sometimes. Eventually my life changed and I let her go. I’m still single, but I’m honestly the happiest I’ve been in my life. When a woman says she’s not into you, just accept it. A lot of movies portray the pursuit of her as “part of loving” or whatever, but It’s better for both her and you to leave it at that.
The friend zone is a place that only exists in our head. Why romantically pursue someone who isn’t interested in us like that. It still exists but it’s up to you to realize it’s not worth trying to stay in and move on to someone who actually is interested romantically.
This is the kind of UA-cam content I love. So many things online are drama and rage bait tailored to us because of the drama fueled algorithms. Thanks for being even just a small part of positivity online
Imho, a possible reason why the idea of the "friend zone" has more power over people than it should could be because socially, having a partner is seen as a goal to achieve like "you are a loser if you don't have partner" "you will never know true happiness unless you have a partner" "having a partner is the ultimate thing that must be achieved". And I understand that having a partner can be a wonderful and beautiful thing, but it can't be your entire peruse in life, not to mention the idea prioritizes getting a relationship by any means necessary, without considering personal growth or fulfillment or the other persons perspective. Looking back at my teenage years I wish I could have taken being in "the friend zone" better, some of those people genuinely wanted just to be friends but to me it was relationship or nothing, but now that I am nearing 30, true friendship has nuch more value to me.
It seems like nobody ever talks about the girls perspective in this. As a girl, why would you even want to be friends with someone that you can clearly tell likes you yet you don't like them back? I never liked & always felt weird hanging out with someone that I knew liked me when I didn't feel the same way, so I just didn't hang out with them
Some girls know what’s going on and act dumb because it doesn’t suit them. Why don’t they make it stop instead they keep getting the benefits without giving anything in return. And yes all relationships are reciprocal and transactional.
The friendzone is describing a very specific type of situationship that does indeed happen. It's absolutely avoidable but saying "it doesn't exist" feels very gaslighty and doesnt make it magically go away. Just because it is easily avoidable and most of the time self inflicted doent mean it "technically doesnt exist" and continually saying this doesnt make it true or help anyone. As a matter of fact all it does is completely disregard someones feelings. Saying "the friendzone doesn't exist" isnt going to magically make someone change their actions and do a 180. What does help is actual advice. So if you find yourself in this situation where you like someone as more than a friend but they only like you as a friend you need to determine some things and make some decisions. One thing would be to take a look at the relationship. Do they really want to be friends or are they deliberately taking advantage of your romantic feelings? If its the later, run. They are NOT your friend if they take advantage of you like this. This one is all too common and can even be unintentional but all the same if you feel as if this is happening its best to move on. If it's the former then you need to decide if you are ok with just being friends with this person. Dont stay friends because "maybe some day" because that will never be a healthy mindset. You need to accept that being friends is all you will be with this person. Now if you are ok with being friends with them and can get past your feelings then thats your decision. If you are not ok with remaining friends then thats ok. Dont let anyone tell you its not ok to not be friends with someone. Dont be a jerk about it but calmly and kindly let them know you were hoping to pursue more and that you arent comfortable staying as just friends. If they lash out at you because of this and accuse you of only wanting sex then you most likely dodged a bullet anyway. In short the best way out of the friendzone is to just stop being friends with them and move on. As for ways to avoid this situation in the future one way is to be more direct. Dont wait for the right time or wait for them to catch feelings too, just straight up tell them how you feel. This helps avoid any confusion. And the second way to avoid it is if they dont express clearly that they are also interested in you then you should move on. No means no. You cant make anyone have feelings for you and thats ok. Dont wait around hoping for them to change their mind because chances are 9 time out of 10 they wont. I know it sucks and probably will for a while. But the best thing to do is take care of yourself always look for ways to improve yourself. TLDR: The friendzone does exist. And the best way to get out is when you tell someone you have feelings and they say they just want to be friends, the best thing to do is say 'no thanks' and move on.
It took me a long time to understand that some relations are just not meant to be no matter how much you want them to be. most of the times its not even because you lack something, some people might not see you as a partner for various reasons but it doesn't mean that no one will. If you find yourself overthinking or being depressed for being in the friendzone then just stop chasing that person and find someone else. Men and boys always neglect self love and give control of their emotions to someone else, which almost never ends well. You are amazing.
Friendzone is real but it's something you allow yourself to be in and you could easily remove yourself from that situation. If you get rejected, but decide to stick around with the hope they'll change their mind wile you remain friends, then congrats you put yourself there. If you get rejected, just move on, you'll find another relationship
Ay bro I feel like this message spoke to me I was highly skeptical of the video at first I was like "this guys actually crazy, of course it does" But after watching till the end it gave me a different perspective. I see my situation where I like someone, but im not sure if they dont like me, and Im now sure that they really dont. Its devasting, but ive decided to move on like I wanna move on. Its recent though, but I wanna focus more on me and then maybe some time around someone out there in the world will appreciate me for me. Thsi channel definitely deserves alot of subs, because I dont think im alone this. Thank you king 👑, you truly helping out ppl here, keep making videos, God bless
Excellent video, I wish I had this video sooner before I wasted a countless amount of time (years) , and money in the friend zone. I’m glad to have learned though and it’s good that videos like this exist now so people won’t make the same mistake
I've been in this situation before and it was bad. There's this girl I've been friends with and liked since I was 5. I tried to have a romantic relationship with her for a long time before I eventually moved on (we were friends until we were 19). I got my first girlfriend at 16, it was someone I met in high school and I've dated other girls since then. The only advice I can give is it's much easier to get over a crush when you're in a relationship. I think why this happens is there's something missing in your life and you think your crush is going to give you that but that's probably not true.
Kinda misses the point of the title. The friendzone exists. You can get friendzoned. And depending on how much you like(d) that person, you can't just turn your feelings off in that instant you get rejected. We're not robots. There will probably some amount of time you still like that person and be sad about the rejection. The friendzone does exist. That you should probably move on after some time, is an entirely different topic (which btw can only exist because the friend zone is in fact a thing.) Also, i barely heard people making a point FOR friend zones (or more precisely, staying in the zone), so it's not really a curious case
It's not the "friend zone" bro. She just simply doesn't want you romantically. You can't have every girl you talk to. The idea of "friend zoning" comes when YOU haven't given in to the reality that you guys aren't a match for a relationship when she already has. It's a coping phrase.
@@avaliausd. you don’t even know what friend zone means do you? Nothing about friendzoning implies lack of self awareness. It’s just a way to make light of the situation and possibly relate to others going through the same.
Problem of youth is that you want to be WITH a person instead of having an loving nurturing experience. Helped myself and others break out of that mentality when I was young but realized that there is no "the one", but rather in a room of people you can spend your life happily with there are lots of people in there. It's just a matter of finding one of them and the first one you get things right with. You may even make mistakes and end up parting ways with one of those people, and some may meet more than one and make the mistake of infidelity. We need to promote a culture where it's easier for guys to be candid about their intentions and feelings, but also people rejecting them is simply a turn to correct them to a path to find someone that will love them. I've noticed fiction in many mediums has unfortunately been used as a substitute for parenting, and that more emphasis needs to be placed on loving experiences than immature chase games. Lots of great wisdom and definitely bookmarked in something I will ask my children to watch!
The friendzone is a state where someone wants more from the relationship than the other. It could get nasty with a lot of breadcrumbing and teasing and leading on, which are forms of psychological abuse tbh. You've effectively put your self-esteem in a vat of acid to be dissolved for as long as you remain in such a situation. But there is a learning opportunity to own your feelings and wants and to quickly discard those who dont want from you what you want from them. It certainly beats the alternative.
back abour november, i had a somewhat botched conversation with my friend who i had liked a lot. ig we both kinda screwed up communicating what we wanted to say and thag jusg kinda left me in the "friendzone" now after that, i just shrugged it off and got on with life. we stayed good friends but i took more time to just build myself up, also hang out with friends and family during the holidays. whats funny is atound january she started messaging me a lot more than she did after the botched convo. she had always been somewhat physical with me in the sense of grabbing onto my arm in the hallways, or just standing close to me. february came around and well Valentine's day exists, whoo! i wasnt expecting anything, and yet i get to my second block and she walks in a few minutes later from the class next door (were both in jrotc and our classes are side by side. also we were not in uniform so PDA wasnt in effect). anyway she walks in, surprises me from behind with a present (squishmallow) and then hugs me immediately after. i figured it was just a friendly gesture and whatnot, so i decided to invite her to the carnival with some of my friends. that went well, we had fun, and i ended up buying her food after bc i figured why not. this is getting pretty long but just bear with me anyway its march now, and she seems to be getting more physical now. it nothing definite ofc but i point out to point it out. like she holds onto me when sitting down next to or behind me. and occasionally she just holds her hand out motioning for mine, and just holds mine with her hands for a while. she also started asking to wear my hoodie whenever she doesnt have one. speaking about hoodies, thats a main reason why we bungled that convo in november. i lent her my hoodie on the friday before and she took it home with her for the weekend. however, she conmected her wearing my hoodie to something couples do. that caused her to start debating her feelings for me, whether she liked me or not. that led to the brief "friend zone" now she is suddenly asking me for my hoodie again and yknow the more physical stuff. anyway so back to the point were in jrotc. every year we have a military ball and this year i asked her out to go with me, and she said yes. we just went yesterday and it went good by all means. were both kinda shy so we didnt really dance or anything. we sat there at our table most of the night, but i left occasionally to talk with friends or use the restroom. i came back from talking with my friends briefly and when i sat down she pulled my chair right next to hers and laid her head on my shoulder. she also held my hand with bother of hers closing her eyes. i laid my head ontop of hers sort of drifting off for a while too. we both woke up a little while later and eventually we ended up sharing my service coat for a while. near the end of the night they started playing a song i was actually talking about earlier. its Neon Moon by Brook n Dunn and i suddenly got in the mood to dance. i asked her to dance and she insisted no because she didnt know how, which i didnt either but it still didnt happen. afterwards we were talking and i asked why she didnt want to since she wouldnt have been the only one not knowing how to dance well. she told me that she had a fear of dancing or being nesr the center of attention, basically stage fright since a lot of people were dancing at thst moment. i felt kinda guilty about that now and apologized for trying to get her to dance. she accepted the apology but then said that she regretted not dancing with me after the fact. i jokingly said "then sounds like you owe me a dance" and we both laughed and talked for a while till i went to sleep and we both said goodnight. i think i got lost in typing and i also kinda forgot my point that i was trying to convey. but yeah i guess its just a nice read if you will. i sorta ended up in the "friendzone" but i didnt let myself think that as i just shrugged it off, let it be, and just made myself better for myself. i didnt change myself for her, but i embraced that she liked certain things and i like other certain things. and despite the fact i didnt change anything to try and woo her over, it sorta just seems to be happening all on its own. i didnt actively pursue her, but it seems like we just clicked since we met.
Guess I'm lucky because after all the rejections with multiple girls we both just stopped acknowledging eachother's existences with me as the quiet newcomer and them just going back to whatever group they were apart of
I dont really use this term myself and tbh this is all just a semantic argument, and most people agree on the prescription of moving on which is healthy and vital to growth. IMO though i think that guys talk about the friendzone with so much vitriol and anger that some people try to move in the other direction and say it doesn't exist. If you accept the defintion of the friendzone as being "the act of one being interested in a person that just sees them as a friend", Its real/it happens point blank period. to deny that, is to say that any person that someone is interested in, is also interested in them, which is obviously bs. imo the friendzone has much more stigma and negativity attached to it than it should. Its the simple act of someone not being into u which is ok both on their end and on your end. The worst part about it/rejection, is the negative perceptions that people ascribe to themselves which oftentimes are not true/are at the very least wildly inflated. Its in ones best interest to make their intentions known relatively early on and to accept a reciprocation or rejection with grace. I just think of the term as a neutral description of a state of unrequited feelings but ultimately I don't think its healthy or productive to argue over the semantics of it, especially not to keep yourself there mentally. Call it the friendzone, say it doesn't exist, i dont rlly care the solution is the same, You deserve to move on.
Everytime I've been "friend zoned" I just stopped being friends with them. After time you either get over it and move on and/or they start coming back to you and usually by then you're already not with it anymore so you just keep pushing.
Something that really helped me get past my college crush was sort of trying to put some sort of emotional logic into it. I have a crush on a girl who didn't like me the same way. All I want is the best for her. I want her to be happy. If she is happy, then it stands that I will be happy. If I am in a relationship(be it just girlfriend/boyfriend or wife/husband) with my crush, I will probably be happy. But my crush won't be. Is it fair that I sacrifice her potential love life and make her unhappy just for my sake? I want her to be happy but she won't be happy if it turns out the way I selfishly want it to. If being friends with her makes her happy, so be it. If her getting with another guy she's genuinely interested in makes her happy, so be it. It does neither of us good if one of us isn't happy being in a relationship. If she isn't happy being with me, what is the point?
I understand your logic, but I would say to search for other things that make YOU happy! There are BILLIONS of other girls in the world you can make memories with, it just so happens that your college crush was the one you put the focus on. Your happiness should not be dependant on a girl. I've been there, believe me, but it's just not gonna be worth it. When you find someone who makes you happy and you make her happy, and you're happy together, that's when it works perfectly. Good luck out there, man!
The way it matured for me was why would I be worried about treating someone so well or feeling happy for them when they won’t ever return the sentiment
I am glad you made this video, I have believed the friend zone didn't exist for a while now. Also, I couldn't agree with the points you made in this video more! Like would one truly be happy if they have to change who they are as a person to be with someone? That doesn't sound like it would be a very healthy relationship in the long run.
Technically, the friend zone does exist then. It's literally the state of chasing someone who doesn't reciprocate the same feelings but chooses to keep you around anyway.
I think the problem is how serious people think freindzone always is. There is one where shes not interested and one where if she tells you shes not dating anyone right now she literally means it. Thats not always a lie. If guys were confident enough theyd see that and just give her space so maybe shell change her mind later. The idea of the freindzone being inescapable comes from the definition of you confessing. You shouldn't have to confess things to people you aren't in a deep relationship with. So no you wont get out of the freindzone because you were weird about it. But if you just give signs you like someone just act normal if they don't like it and youll be ok
I felt like you ignored the friend zone cases that happen due to cowardice. Lots of guys get stuck in the friend zone because they’re too scared to tell the girl how they feel and settle for being friends rather than taking a risk
Back in my early years of high school, one of my friends had a crush on me. She didn’t make that known for a few months since I was still figuring out my own stuff. It became rather obvious a few months in until I gave it a chance and we ended up dating for 3 years. It was a great relationship but I wish that she would’ve said something about her crushing on me sooner.
You know, if you fall on the "friend zone" that's your own fault for not having the guts to ask the person out from the very beggining; people tend to involve with their crush romantically covering it all with "friendship" and that's no different from a wolf wearing a sheep cloak; the only thing you'll gain from that is looking like a clown and you'll definitely loose a very good friend. I guarantee you that that person will appreciate your honesty and not wasting their time building up a friendship that you didn't had the intention to nurture from the very beggining, it's a pretty shitty thing to do to someone. And in case that they are not into you then accept it and move on and do whatever you want with the time that you saved for yourself and the other person.
In my opinion, it is not very good for you to ask a person to start a relationship without first having gotten to know them better. Personally, I like to start with a friendly relationship first, since I usually fall in love with someone, If I know him in a good way, I'm not a fan of falling in love at first sight, and that also happens with other women and even with some men, it is preferable to first get to know the person and form a connection before first having a love relationship, of course the problem is that you have the possibility of being in the friend zone, but I think that this can be avoided if you see your crush from the beginning also as a possible friend, not only using him/ her to get a partner, and if you can't, well the best thing would be to get away from that relationship, although another way to conquistate him/ her over by having in the start a friendly relationship would be to try to show him/ her more loving emotions, so he/she can notice that there is something else there.
@@teddybear7200 You don't have to start the relationship from the very beggining of course that you need to get to know them first, the whole point is that you make them aware that you want to form a bond with a romantical goal in a non-decieving way.
@@rocataurus4414just curious, how would you go by making them aware that you actually have romantic feelings for that person in a way that is not deceitful
I already learned this the hardway after learning that the girl I was attached to is dating another guy and found a new friend circle that she didn't introduce me to.
Bro you deserve more likes and subscribers you earned my Sub your content is so good to a point where it gave me a bit of understanding to stuff that's been bottling up so tnx for this advice 👍
I think you made a lot of great points and doled out some good advice on the topic, though I think a minute could have been taken to give a bit of advice to the lads that are actively being manipulated to stay in the friendzone by women sprinkling just enough hope and attention to keep them deliberately trapped. I think most dudes have the sense to just move on when in this situation. It's when they're being clawed back into the zone when they try to escape that it becomes a hazard to their life and prospects.
The friend zone is really in your head. Stop giving energy to someone who's not going to give that same amount of energy back. Accept she just doesn't like you like that and either continue being her actual friend with no expectations from her or remove her from your life and move on. Honestly no judgment for the latter. Anything else and you are setting yourself up to get your feelings hurt and manipulated.
Not every main character in movies or TV shows get to have a happily ever after with an unrequited love interest, and that's okay. Take Quasimodo from Disney's The Hunchback of Notre Dame for example: he was infatuated with Esmeralda who was kind and friendly to him; he doubted that he would have his feelings for her reciprocated due to his physical appearance. Unfortunately for him, Esmeralda was attracted to someone else, Phoebus, who saw her prior to Quasimodo meeting her. When he saw the two of them kiss right in front of him, it broke him. Eventually tho, towards the end of the movie, Quasi was kind and heroic enough to accept Esmeralda as a friend and nothing more, and humbly let her be with Phoebus. He didn't need a girl's love to make him happy, he just wanted to be accepted into society, and that was good enough for him. Luckly, he got with another girl, Madelline, who did reciprocate his feelings and loved him for who he is in The Hunchback of Notre Dame II.
Fuck, I wish someone loved me like quasi. I’m not even ugly, good looking in fact. And yet, sometimes I feel like women are just intimidated by my menacing aura… They don’t even look at me. It’s as if they’re scared to look at me
@@LilXancheX I'm kinda in the same situation as you, like I have the resting “beach” face problem and usually a quiet person, maybe that's why none of them will ever approach me 🤷. Doesn't help my lack of confidence and inferiority complex at all.
Contrast this with Frollo's reaction; When Esmeralda rejected him, instead of accepting that Esmeralda wasn't even remotely interested in him, he decided to burn the entirety of Paris in what amounts to a temper tantrum in an attempt to not only kill the gypsies, but also Esmeralda in order to get revenge. In other words, Quasimodo handled his rejection gracefully and moved on, eventually finding love with a girl who does reciprocate his feelings, Frollo handled it like a bratty child throwing a toy away the moment the toy doesn't behave as he wants, eventually dying surrounded by a hell of his own making.
hi as a woman, i appreciate this video cuz it helps me better understand the guy's perspective in this... but i will say (despite ur gender) if someone says that you should change something about your CHARACTER (not ur personality, not ur hobbies, not ur values, but your character), that may be something to consider, espeically if mulitple r saying it or if you feel like "all women don't like me". the amounts of times that i have met men who say "i just need to find someone who will accept me as me" and refuse to work on themselves and become better people (ex: not apologizing, persistently lying, always taking shit about people, not respecting boundaries, not loving themselves so much to the point that they treat the people around them poorly)... like no! that is not when you just hope that someone will accept the fact that you are an asshole. You take responsibility and try to become a better person!! yes changing who you are for a girl or a guy or whoever in the sense of your personality, hobbies, physique, etc. can be a rough topic; it's much rather to find someone who accepts all that for you. but if ppl list things as mentioned above, that's not on the people you're interested in. thats on you. thats on me.
Me personally anytime I find myself in a friendship with a woman that has no signs of progressing I cut her off then move on that stops her from manipulating my feelings for her benefit the way I see if the relationship aren’t on terms we mutually agree on tf is she still doing in my life?
A world of options? dude I mean you're kinda right but it's not product choosing. When you're into someone you can't just stick out. you're just gonna hurt others because you're still into the previous person. I'm experiencing this shit rn and can't really help thinking about that person.
Dude there's a whole world outside that needs to be discovered. My situation, after the day of dating her, I confessed to her my feelings and that was a big rejection on my face. Yeah, I moved on. It damn hurt and all you need to do is get through man, that how humanity nowadays works. It's up to you man, good luck!
@mrglantisgaming1576 Oh man I feel ya. I haven't yet confessed and in the back of my mind I know it would be a rejection at the end of the day- but I kinda- of can't accept that. And yet still I'm too scared to confess my feelings. So I'm just wasting my time without knowing if it's worth it or not
I would add something Sometimes is when you don't care about the friendzone that the girl you like will find attraction for you In my experiences, after being "friendzoned" I simply decided to be a friend, behave like that and move on. It happened that the same girl that "friendzoned" me kissed me days later.
Because you made it clear that your available to her and that works out sometimes when you let the thought simmer in the woman’s mind but sometimes they do like people they friendzone but their reactionary response is no
0:51 Wow, that is a soul-crushingly exhaustive collection of friendzoning statements. Did you gather all these voice clips yourself? Or did you find either a playlist or a supercut from someone else?
I agree The Friendzone technically exists and doesn’t exist. It only exists if you stay there. Never be friends with a woman, especially if it was one that you liked very much. She’s just going to use you for your energy, attention, and time. Even if she’s being genuine, you’re not gonna talk to her much anyway because you can’t pursue masculine hobbies with her like you can with your Bros. All of that time which could be used on another woman who has higher interest in you. A woman wanting to be friends with you after you date her it’s just cap. Example I was dating a Mexican cutie pie but after we dated a few times, she said she was only interested in being friends and I said OK and then I never talked to her again. If she truly wanted to be my friend, she would’ve followed up and asked to hang out or something or how am i doing? That’s why this whole thing is disingenuous because she just wanted to store me away like a bottle of wine and crack me open and drink away my attention. The whole concept of having friends of the opposite sex is a scam anyway because eventually either you’re gonna wanna hook up with her and she’s not interested or she’s gonna wanna hook up with you and you’re not interested (I know some people are gonna say that’s not possible and they would bang any girl if given, the chance but if you have a girl that’s a friend there’s generally a big reason why that is).
I been friend zoned, and most importantly, i expected her to do so. I figured to save myself the trouble of pain and get it over with. Does it hurt? Yes Will it forever? Not really More like it matures along with you. In the end, i see it now as a blessing in disguise, a act of mercy if you will. Just because she doesn't feel the way to me as i to her, doesn't mean i dont matter to her. Keep in mind that there other people (girls or boys) would be more harsh and mean in rejection of your romantic feelings, among that compares that the friend zone is more a sweet and gentle to the heart.
This kinda happened to me a few months ago. So I was friends with this girl who I thought was really cool, but she was dating a friend of mine, so naturally I didn't feel anything for her. After some time they broke up and we started chatting more and I started to like her a bit, we even went out on a couple of dates together. My feelings for her grew and it got to the point were I just had to tell her. She understood and was cool about it, but she obviously didn't like me back and she actually got back together with my friend. I got sad and felt a bit used to be honest, but I understood that my feelings for her were more because I was feeling lonely and not much because I did like her. So I took my time and didn't talk to her for like a month or so. Eventually I reached out to her and we became friends again. I realized i wanted to keep her as a friend because of how much she meant to me, but I didn't want to be with her because we just weren't that compatible in that regard. I don't have romantic feelings for her anymore, but we are still close and have a good friendship. So my word of advice to anyone that is going through something similar would be to just let your feelings go and move on, even if it may take you some time, so that maybe in the end you still have a good friendship.
Friendzone does and doesn't exist like you said. It's a prison of your own emotional making that you need to leave to become better. Giving up isn't always the right thing but in this case it is
Another thing very important to point out is that if you're constantly thinking about the risks of getting friendzoned this will make you act more insecure, the thought will hunt you like a ghost. But it's not real, you're letting it take place. That doesn't mean you have a chance with everybody, sometimes you get "friendzoned" because of compatibility issues. Maybe you're great for girl A and B, but if you like girl C and she doesn't like you... Well, that's life, sometimes we're lucky, sometimes we're not. Anyways, always learn from this experience and don't get traumatized by some random girl standards. Like the wise man in the video said, move on.
My take on the "Friendzone" is it's a mental block you put on yourself due to your unreciprocated feelings for someone. To truly get out of the Friendzone is to acknowledge your worth and simply move on. That's what I did.
Horrible audio issues half way in the video. Apologies king
No probs bro
Can you please link the piano song that played 90 seconds in? Please?
Kinda did't even notice. About the vid tho... Allow me to head into a bit of a long reasoning. Let's say that for the last 2 or 3 years life's been hard on me, new school, couple of difficult breakups (because i'm consistant and it's rather hard for me to disattach from a partner), almost got kicked out of school because of a long and periodicаlly dumb story . Or so i thought. The thing is, i took about 2 weeks to think, reconsider a couple of moments and now... well, it's probably obvious that i was making it harder myself. Used to blame everything but myself and wondering why there was no changes what so ever The reason why i'm saying this is because at that point a few of your videos pushed me to reconsider my looks on life. So yeah, the things you said are 100% true
heeh hee!
the friendzone doesnt exist cuz the woman isnt even your friend and never will be.
"You remind of me my little sister"
Bruh i would never recover if my crush said that 💀
Ayo Wh-
😭😭
😂😂
Worse than little brother 💀
Same, didn’t even know people said that 💀
Usually if a girl likes you yall just click. It’s harder to get her to stop talking to u than to get her to talk to you. Don’t pretend to be something ur not for a girl who won’t even treat you right. Keep ur head up.
So THAT'S what happens when a chick likes you...
Huh.
Almost 25 years and I never knew. 😂
Exactly, if it ain't working and you're having to really chase her then maybe just don't, go for another one.
This even hits harder, cuz I cant even remember a single girl, which cant be stopped talking to me, if started at all. Damn...
Not necessarily. I’ve had girls who outwardly expressed interest in me by constantly talking to me and doing things for me, but i’ve also had girls who liked me but we never talked on the phone never texted left me on open and didnt show much interest at all. Or sometimes girls will joke around with you how friends do but the whole time they liked you. It depends on the girl
Yep, that's how it goes. When she's interested in you, things click, but when you're interested in her, good luck.
The best way not to be in the friend zone is simply change your approach to dating in general. Make your intentions clear when meeting a girl early on if youre interested in her or not. If she isnt interested, move on and you won't be clouded with emotions if she rejects. Don’t settle for 'friendship' if shes not interested either, hoping you can change her mind, or will just accept anything just to be in contact with her.
If it's too late for that, just cut contact. Being around someone you're interested in who doesnt feel the same back isn’t healthy. So cut them off and learn from your mistakes.
I stopped the idea of being "friendly" when I was 18. Haven't had this issue since.
Bro just saved all the homies that believed this generational lie, thanks dude
Wait what generational lie ?
@@rohanmaharaj9925you
@@rohanmaharaj9925 go back to sleep.
@@rohanmaharaj9925 that a girl puts you on the friendzone.
@@CarlMarxPunk i didn't watched the video but isn't someone that's not romantically interested for quite literally many varying reasons just keeping you in the friend-status and you're just obsessed with that person romantically, essentially just hurting youself? You just hadn't initially processed their thought process and got addicted to the idea something romantic might work out with them if you stick around and can't even even grieve that it likely might not happen if you take a disgusting amount of time to develop anything romantic with them
I can personally agree on his case. I had a crush, we were great friends and when I asked her out she just didn't like me back like that. We became even better friends, and I moved on and dated 2 other people. She eventually came back around and my friend told me that my former crush liked me, so I spoke to her and it didn't work out. It will be fine kings, if she rejects you surround yourself with friends, family, and maybe potential lovers ;)
You spoke to her and it didn’t work out? What was your point?
@@Rizzal169 to move on, we weren't really clicking relationship wise, I should prob make an edit to this comment to clarify but basically we just weren't rlly compatible, we both recognized it. After I asked her out before she liked me I moved on fully. She eventually came around but sometimes if she doesn't like you back maybe you guys shouldn't get together. That's what I was communicating there
So she swung back despite initially rejecting you? And you took it?
@@SwordSaint_Y if by took it you mean accepted, yea, but we weren't clicking after a while ad thought it was best to split. We are still rlly good friends
She learned that you got other girls, so she came crawling back. It’s called mate choice copying, or pre selection.
Also, i feel like not paying mind to/not believing in the friendzone is an integral part of being able to keep a friendship after being interested in someone. If you dont take things personally and dont try to chase them, then its much more likely that you can preserve the friendship yall have if you can simply move on.
But why keep that kind of friendship? Wouldn't it be awkward and feelings would still creep up every so often.
@@frankkennedy6388 imo it's only really awkward if you let it be. if the two of you still value each other in a platonic way, then its still possible to preserve the friendship if it's worth it in the first place. about feelings creeping up, I think that just comes with time
@@frankkennedy6388 its not awkward as long as the two of you can still value each other as platonic friends. I think the awkard thing comes in if you never saw the person as anything platonic and saw them as a love interest from the get go.
I mean if you have feelings for someone then it’s not really a friendship is it? You wanted more and you’re just settling for a platonic relationship. Best you move on completely tbh
See that’s exactly what he’s saying in the video. If you don’t like em you not in the friend zone
I've heard countless women admit to stringing along men that they weren't interested in. Even a coworker in her 60s admitted to it. It's nothing new, and people who deny it are either naive or gaslighting. That said, men shouldn't pursue women under the guise of friendship. It's deceitful towards women and will only prolong the discomfort you experience. Either be a genuine platonic friend or move on altogether, but please don't be an orbiter. For your own dignity if nothing else.
yup! all people regardless of gender can be deceitful and manipulative, and if any of us were to deny it we should really think a little longer and harder about our own actions. the best we can hope for is to give our very best effort to be kind and genuine to everybody we meet without expectations of favors or thanks.
You just mogged this soytuber.
to be fair there are cases when someone is not interested in a girl, but the day to day interaction makes the guy fall for her, it happened to me once when I was young, not my type, , she started seeking me and wanting to do things together, called me at home, etc, when I noticed I had fallen for her and thats when everything went south lol. The problem I see is people only talk about men approaching women in a deceiving way, but sometimes is more complicated, in this case I would not have initiated the interactions and it was only after said interactions that I fell for her.
Ok... But is it possible to be an orbiter AND a genuine platonic friend? Like, you genuinely enjoy just being their friend but you also wouldn't mind if it turned into something more? Sorry, I could be completely out of line, I just feel like as a guy it's hard to see someone just as a platonic friend if they're single and you also find them cute/attractive.
The friendzone just demonstrates the danger of naming something or diagnosing a problem. The easiest way out of the friendzone is to stop saying that you’re in the friendzone.
We have nothing to fear but fear itself
-Robert J Oppenheimer probably
Japan about to have something to fear 💣
Fransis Bacon
@@metaknight3116 BRO
I would like but 115 likes
@@metaknight3116 dawg 💀
The friend zone exists, but it's up to the guy to decide whether or not he wants to stay there.
The "friend zone" is copium. Grow up.
@@unicorn1655 that’s the point.
@@CR0WYT bro didn't read your comment 💀
@@unicorn1655chill
In my experience, the friend zone only exists if one party is only interested in sex.
Had to realize this the hard way when I legit accepted the friendzone label, and then the girl who was my “friend” ended up ghosting me anyways. She actually did me a favor in doing that rather than stringing me along, but it’s a legit game changer when you realize if you or her made shit too awkward, go try again with someone else and don’t make the same mistakes.
Same. Took me 3 years & being left on delivered for a week TWICE to cut her off. Felt much happier since
This has changed my entire outlook on the topic. I guess the mental aspect of it is the hardest part to get through, considering many of us have been in the "friendzone" for a while, without truly knowing that it is a mentality that is holding you captive.This is some good stuff man. Thank you
"once one let's go of their simpage, they leave the friendzone by default"
~Lao Tsu, the art of rizz
Ah yes, sun tsu’s brother wrote the art of rizz. Truly an amazing family.
@@player_566-1 wait Lao Tsu is Sun Tsu's brother??
@@12DAMDO I just made a joke since they have the same last names
@@player_566-1 oh haha.. just like how Neil DeGrasse Tyson is Mike Tyson's brother in that show Mike Tyson Mysteries
Never force yourself to be friends with someone in the hopes of being something more later on. Be friends with those who you are genuinely interested in being friends with. Otherwise you are lying to yourself and to the other person and it will ultimately likely lead to resentment down the road. Resentment towards them for not giving you what you want and resentment towards yourself for allowing yourself to waste your and their time when you could have been pursuing people who were genuinely interested in you or spending time doing the things you actually wanted to do.
WE ESCAPING THE FRIEND ZONE WITH THIS ONE 🔥🔥THANK U KING
I gotchu king 👑
A good way to say what was trying to be said at the beginning is that the friendzone is something you put yourself in with a person you're romantically and/or sexually interested in. You trap yourself in this zone of trying to get someone who doesn't like you for who you are already. You shouldn't have to change yourself for a person. You should change yourself if you got problems that need to be fixed but that's self improvement. Self adjustment is what people do in the friendzone. They try to change themselves in various ways to seem more attractive to a person that isn't already interested in them like that. You shouldn't have to adjust yourself for someone you want romantically or in any way. You should be yourself and if you yourself isn't good enough for them then get out of the friendzone. To be in it is to imprison yourself. You should leave that person behind as just a friend and find someone else that does like you for who you are. When you put yourself in the friendzone you think of it as a stage or level you have to beat to get to the next level or stage in the relationship. But if you don't see it that way anymore then you'll just be friends. Maybe become good friends or best friends. But that's just a variation of a friend. You'll still be in the same "zone" but there is no zones if there's only one. You're just friends, good friends, or best friends. No need to categorize it with zones. If someone ain't interested in you in that way then find someone else who you like that is.
There's bound to be a person in the world for another person in the world. And I don't recommend looking for them. When the time comes. You'll find them. And they'll find you. After that you can see if it works and if it doesn't then don't hold onto that feeling and trap yourself. Let it go and accept they don't want you that way. If it does work then congratulations. Have good communication and you should find yourself happy. If the time ever comes to let that person go. Then do it. To stay and delay the inevitable breakup is like the friendzone. A prison of your own making and something that needs to end for you to flourish. Like how Morty became better when he left his feelings for Jessica. You will too if you leave a doomed relationship or a friendzone of your making. Maybe it'll be hard in the beginning. But eventually you'll be better off for it. Just make sure when you become aware of it you end it off immediately in an appropriate manor. Or you'll ache from knowing the inevitable and may regret how it ended
There's a difference between changing yourself and improving yourself
In my mind, the friend zone is when you confess your feeling and they say something like "I think of us just as friends". That's the friend zone, but you can move on to live a life with joy from something other than her. In conclusion, the friend zone exists, but you're not stuck in it because you can move on and get out of the friend zone, just not in the way you originally would have wanted it to be.
This is so real. I had a crush on someone who friendzoned me hard and it fuckin destroyed me, I did stuff I’m not proud of and behaved like a different person sometimes. Eventually my life changed and I let her go. I’m still single, but I’m honestly the happiest I’ve been in my life. When a woman says she’s not into you, just accept it. A lot of movies portray the pursuit of her as “part of loving” or whatever, but It’s better for both her and you to leave it at that.
The friend zone is a place that only exists in our head. Why romantically pursue someone who isn’t interested in us like that. It still exists but it’s up to you to realize it’s not worth trying to stay in and move on to someone who actually is interested romantically.
If I didn't pursue girls who weren't interested in me, I'd never pursue a girl again.
This is the kind of UA-cam content I love. So many things online are drama and rage bait tailored to us because of the drama fueled algorithms. Thanks for being even just a small part of positivity online
4:20 "Displays his heroic attributes" was paired with the perfect clip of Finn punting a candy child. Amazing.
This channel is honestly helping me alot with my insecurities
Best solution after being friendzoned is to distance yourselves from the individual, shift your focus to other personal things and work on yourselves.
Imho, a possible reason why the idea of the "friend zone" has more power over people than it should could be because socially, having a partner is seen as a goal to achieve like "you are a loser if you don't have partner" "you will never know true happiness unless you have a partner" "having a partner is the ultimate thing that must be achieved". And I understand that having a partner can be a wonderful and beautiful thing, but it can't be your entire peruse in life, not to mention the idea prioritizes getting a relationship by any means necessary, without considering personal growth or fulfillment or the other persons perspective.
Looking back at my teenage years I wish I could have taken being in "the friend zone" better, some of those people genuinely wanted just to be friends but to me it was relationship or nothing, but now that I am nearing 30, true friendship has nuch more value to me.
THANK YOU! Realizing the friend zone does not exist is a sign of serious leveling up in maturity. 🙌
You care for them or you don’t!
It seems like nobody ever talks about the girls perspective in this. As a girl, why would you even want to be friends with someone that you can clearly tell likes you yet you don't like them back? I never liked & always felt weird hanging out with someone that I knew liked me when I didn't feel the same way, so I just didn't hang out with them
Some girls just like the attention.
Psycyopath using them for short term benefits like money, attention, ego boost
Why do boys continue being friends with a women they know they still have feelings for
Some girls know what’s going on and act dumb because it doesn’t suit them.
Why don’t they make it stop instead they keep getting the benefits without giving anything in return.
And yes all relationships are reciprocal and transactional.
@@TheSm1thersmajority of girls that male friends used them as options not friends
Great advice, I know so many people who cannot move on from people, this is what they need to hear.
The friendzone is a room. people just tend to wait for the door to open not realizing there is a second door right behind them
The friendzone is describing a very specific type of situationship that does indeed happen. It's absolutely avoidable but saying "it doesn't exist" feels very gaslighty and doesnt make it magically go away. Just because it is easily avoidable and most of the time self inflicted doent mean it "technically doesnt exist" and continually saying this doesnt make it true or help anyone. As a matter of fact all it does is completely disregard someones feelings. Saying "the friendzone doesn't exist" isnt going to magically make someone change their actions and do a 180.
What does help is actual advice. So if you find yourself in this situation where you like someone as more than a friend but they only like you as a friend you need to determine some things and make some decisions. One thing would be to take a look at the relationship. Do they really want to be friends or are they deliberately taking advantage of your romantic feelings? If its the later, run. They are NOT your friend if they take advantage of you like this. This one is all too common and can even be unintentional but all the same if you feel as if this is happening its best to move on. If it's the former then you need to decide if you are ok with just being friends with this person. Dont stay friends because "maybe some day" because that will never be a healthy mindset. You need to accept that being friends is all you will be with this person. Now if you are ok with being friends with them and can get past your feelings then thats your decision. If you are not ok with remaining friends then thats ok. Dont let anyone tell you its not ok to not be friends with someone. Dont be a jerk about it but calmly and kindly let them know you were hoping to pursue more and that you arent comfortable staying as just friends. If they lash out at you because of this and accuse you of only wanting sex then you most likely dodged a bullet anyway.
In short the best way out of the friendzone is to just stop being friends with them and move on. As for ways to avoid this situation in the future one way is to be more direct. Dont wait for the right time or wait for them to catch feelings too, just straight up tell them how you feel. This helps avoid any confusion. And the second way to avoid it is if they dont express clearly that they are also interested in you then you should move on. No means no. You cant make anyone have feelings for you and thats ok. Dont wait around hoping for them to change their mind because chances are 9 time out of 10 they wont. I know it sucks and probably will for a while. But the best thing to do is take care of yourself always look for ways to improve yourself.
TLDR: The friendzone does exist. And the best way to get out is when you tell someone you have feelings and they say they just want to be friends, the best thing to do is say 'no thanks' and move on.
It took me a long time to understand that some relations are just not meant to be no matter how much you want them to be. most of the times its not even because you lack something, some people might not see you as a partner for various reasons but it doesn't mean that no one will. If you find yourself overthinking or being depressed for being in the friendzone then just stop chasing that person and find someone else. Men and boys always neglect self love and give control of their emotions to someone else, which almost never ends well. You are amazing.
Friendzone is real but it's something you allow yourself to be in and you could easily remove yourself from that situation. If you get rejected, but decide to stick around with the hope they'll change their mind wile you remain friends, then congrats you put yourself there. If you get rejected, just move on, you'll find another relationship
Ay bro I feel like this message spoke to me
I was highly skeptical of the video at first I was like "this guys actually crazy, of course it does"
But after watching till the end it gave me a different perspective. I see my situation where I like someone, but im not sure if they dont like me, and Im now sure that they really dont. Its devasting, but ive decided to move on like I wanna move on. Its recent though, but I wanna focus more on me and then maybe some time around someone out there in the world will appreciate me for me. Thsi channel definitely deserves alot of subs, because I dont think im alone this. Thank you king 👑, you truly helping out ppl here, keep making videos, God bless
You dropped this my boy 👑
Much love king!!👑
@@KingTheodore100*takes crown and eats it 🫦👑*
Excellent video, I wish I had this video sooner before I wasted a countless amount of time (years) , and money in the friend zone. I’m glad to have learned though and it’s good that videos like this exist now so people won’t make the same mistake
I've been in this situation before and it was bad. There's this girl I've been friends with and liked since I was 5. I tried to have a romantic relationship with her for a long time before I eventually moved on (we were friends until we were 19). I got my first girlfriend at 16, it was someone I met in high school and I've dated other girls since then. The only advice I can give is it's much easier to get over a crush when you're in a relationship. I think why this happens is there's something missing in your life and you think your crush is going to give you that but that's probably not true.
Kinda misses the point of the title.
The friendzone exists. You can get friendzoned. And depending on how much you like(d) that person, you can't just turn your feelings off in that instant you get rejected. We're not robots. There will probably some amount of time you still like that person and be sad about the rejection.
The friendzone does exist. That you should probably move on after some time, is an entirely different topic (which btw can only exist because the friend zone is in fact a thing.) Also, i barely heard people making a point FOR friend zones (or more precisely, staying in the zone), so it's not really a curious case
It's not the "friend zone" bro. She just simply doesn't want you romantically. You can't have every girl you talk to. The idea of "friend zoning" comes when YOU haven't given in to the reality that you guys aren't a match for a relationship when she already has. It's a coping phrase.
The point is the "Friend-zone" is literally just copium
Literally just grow up
@@avaliausd. you don’t even know what friend zone means do you?
Nothing about friendzoning implies lack of self awareness. It’s just a way to make light of the situation and possibly relate to others going through the same.
@@avaliausd.Preach
@@daddy3484He knows but the phrase became a misunderstanding over time
Problem of youth is that you want to be WITH a person instead of having an loving nurturing experience. Helped myself and others break out of that mentality when I was young but realized that there is no "the one", but rather in a room of people you can spend your life happily with there are lots of people in there. It's just a matter of finding one of them and the first one you get things right with. You may even make mistakes and end up parting ways with one of those people, and some may meet more than one and make the mistake of infidelity.
We need to promote a culture where it's easier for guys to be candid about their intentions and feelings, but also people rejecting them is simply a turn to correct them to a path to find someone that will love them. I've noticed fiction in many mediums has unfortunately been used as a substitute for parenting, and that more emphasis needs to be placed on loving experiences than immature chase games.
Lots of great wisdom and definitely bookmarked in something I will ask my children to watch!
The friendzone is a state where someone wants more from the relationship than the other. It could get nasty with a lot of breadcrumbing and teasing and leading on, which are forms of psychological abuse tbh. You've effectively put your self-esteem in a vat of acid to be dissolved for as long as you remain in such a situation. But there is a learning opportunity to own your feelings and wants and to quickly discard those who dont want from you what you want from them. It certainly beats the alternative.
back abour november, i had a somewhat botched conversation with my friend who i had liked a lot. ig we both kinda screwed up communicating what we wanted to say and thag jusg kinda left me in the "friendzone"
now after that, i just shrugged it off and got on with life. we stayed good friends but i took more time to just build myself up, also hang out with friends and family during the holidays.
whats funny is atound january she started messaging me a lot more than she did after the botched convo. she had always been somewhat physical with me in the sense of grabbing onto my arm in the hallways, or just standing close to me.
february came around and well Valentine's day exists, whoo! i wasnt expecting anything, and yet i get to my second block and she walks in a few minutes later from the class next door (were both in jrotc and our classes are side by side. also we were not in uniform so PDA wasnt in effect).
anyway she walks in, surprises me from behind with a present (squishmallow) and then hugs me immediately after. i figured it was just a friendly gesture and whatnot, so i decided to invite her to the carnival with some of my friends. that went well, we had fun, and i ended up buying her food after bc i figured why not.
this is getting pretty long but just bear with me
anyway its march now, and she seems to be getting more physical now. it nothing definite ofc but i point out to point it out. like she holds onto me when sitting down next to or behind me. and occasionally she just holds her hand out motioning for mine, and just holds mine with her hands for a while. she also started asking to wear my hoodie whenever she doesnt have one.
speaking about hoodies, thats a main reason why we bungled that convo in november. i lent her my hoodie on the friday before and she took it home with her for the weekend. however, she conmected her wearing my hoodie to something couples do. that caused her to start debating her feelings for me, whether she liked me or not. that led to the brief "friend zone"
now she is suddenly asking me for my hoodie again and yknow the more physical stuff. anyway so back to the point were in jrotc. every year we have a military ball and this year i asked her out to go with me, and she said yes. we just went yesterday and it went good by all means. were both kinda shy so we didnt really dance or anything. we sat there at our table most of the night, but i left occasionally to talk with friends or use the restroom. i came back from talking with my friends briefly and when i sat down she pulled my chair right next to hers and laid her head on my shoulder. she also held my hand with bother of hers closing her eyes. i laid my head ontop of hers sort of drifting off for a while too. we both woke up a little while later and eventually we ended up sharing my service coat for a while.
near the end of the night they started playing a song i was actually talking about earlier. its Neon Moon by Brook n Dunn and i suddenly got in the mood to dance. i asked her to dance and she insisted no because she didnt know how, which i didnt either but it still didnt happen. afterwards we were talking and i asked why she didnt want to since she wouldnt have been the only one not knowing how to dance well.
she told me that she had a fear of dancing or being nesr the center of attention, basically stage fright since a lot of people were dancing at thst moment. i felt kinda guilty about that now and apologized for trying to get her to dance. she accepted the apology but then said that she regretted not dancing with me after the fact. i jokingly said "then sounds like you owe me a dance" and we both laughed and talked for a while till i went to sleep and we both said goodnight.
i think i got lost in typing and i also kinda forgot my point that i was trying to convey. but yeah i guess its just a nice read if you will. i sorta ended up in the "friendzone" but i didnt let myself think that as i just shrugged it off, let it be, and just made myself better for myself. i didnt change myself for her, but i embraced that she liked certain things and i like other certain things. and despite the fact i didnt change anything to try and woo her over, it sorta just seems to be happening all on its own. i didnt actively pursue her, but it seems like we just clicked since we met.
broo really now?
Bro wrote a light novel 💀
@@Dayethoven ✍️✍️✍️🔥🔥🔥
❤🎉That's awesome bro!! Good on you for not letting it get to your head. I'll try to do the same.
Damn, I've read all that, good job me. 🎉
Guess I'm lucky because after all the rejections with multiple girls we both just stopped acknowledging eachother's existences with me as the quiet newcomer and them just going back to whatever group they were apart of
Nice to see you again king! Take care of yourself!
Much love king 👑😁
I dont really use this term myself and tbh this is all just a semantic argument, and most people agree on the prescription of moving on which is healthy and vital to growth. IMO though i think that guys talk about the friendzone with so much vitriol and anger that some people try to move in the other direction and say it doesn't exist. If you accept the defintion of the friendzone as being "the act of one being interested in a person that just sees them as a friend", Its real/it happens point blank period. to deny that, is to say that any person that someone is interested in, is also interested in them, which is obviously bs.
imo the friendzone has much more stigma and negativity attached to it than it should. Its the simple act of someone not being into u which is ok both on their end and on your end. The worst part about it/rejection, is the negative perceptions that people ascribe to themselves which oftentimes are not true/are at the very least wildly inflated. Its in ones best interest to make their intentions known relatively early on and to accept a reciprocation or rejection with grace. I just think of the term as a neutral description of a state of unrequited feelings but ultimately I don't think its healthy or productive to argue over the semantics of it, especially not to keep yourself there mentally. Call it the friendzone, say it doesn't exist, i dont rlly care the solution is the same, You deserve to move on.
I've been trying to explain this, you did it so eloquently. Great bud dude!
Haven't seen The king post ina while, again another banger 👑
KING BRADLEY👑👑👑 GOOD TO SEE YOU STOP BY
@@KingTheodore100 Will always stop by for every upload king, you videos teach me so many lessons🙏
Everytime I've been "friend zoned" I just stopped being friends with them. After time you either get over it and move on and/or they start coming back to you and usually by then you're already not with it anymore so you just keep pushing.
Something that really helped me get past my college crush was sort of trying to put some sort of emotional logic into it.
I have a crush on a girl who didn't like me the same way. All I want is the best for her. I want her to be happy. If she is happy, then it stands that I will be happy.
If I am in a relationship(be it just girlfriend/boyfriend or wife/husband) with my crush, I will probably be happy. But my crush won't be. Is it fair that I sacrifice her potential love life and make her unhappy just for my sake? I want her to be happy but she won't be happy if it turns out the way I selfishly want it to.
If being friends with her makes her happy, so be it. If her getting with another guy she's genuinely interested in makes her happy, so be it. It does neither of us good if one of us isn't happy being in a relationship. If she isn't happy being with me, what is the point?
I understand your logic, but I would say to search for other things that make YOU happy! There are BILLIONS of other girls in the world you can make memories with, it just so happens that your college crush was the one you put the focus on. Your happiness should not be dependant on a girl. I've been there, believe me, but it's just not gonna be worth it. When you find someone who makes you happy and you make her happy, and you're happy together, that's when it works perfectly.
Good luck out there, man!
The way it matured for me was why would I be worried about treating someone so well or feeling happy for them when they won’t ever return the sentiment
I am glad you made this video, I have believed the friend zone didn't exist for a while now. Also, I couldn't agree with the points you made in this video more! Like would one truly be happy if they have to change who they are as a person to be with someone? That doesn't sound like it would be a very healthy relationship in the long run.
This guy said exactly what I needed to hear
0:15 schrodinger's zone
Subscribed. Mans was SPITTEN
Technically, the friend zone does exist then. It's literally the state of chasing someone who doesn't reciprocate the same feelings but chooses to keep you around anyway.
There's already a word for when you act like that: ✨ delusional ✨
I think the problem is how serious people think freindzone always is. There is one where shes not interested and one where if she tells you shes not dating anyone right now she literally means it. Thats not always a lie. If guys were confident enough theyd see that and just give her space so maybe shell change her mind later.
The idea of the freindzone being inescapable comes from the definition of you confessing. You shouldn't have to confess things to people you aren't in a deep relationship with. So no you wont get out of the freindzone because you were weird about it. But if you just give signs you like someone just act normal if they don't like it and youll be ok
I felt like you ignored the friend zone cases that happen due to cowardice. Lots of guys get stuck in the friend zone because they’re too scared to tell the girl how they feel and settle for being friends rather than taking a risk
It's been 5 months and the pain still stings
Loyal people are about to be stuck in that illusions :(
Is that loyalty tho, or delusion?
Back in my early years of high school, one of my friends had a crush on me. She didn’t make that known for a few months since I was still figuring out my own stuff. It became rather obvious a few months in until I gave it a chance and we ended up dating for 3 years. It was a great relationship but I wish that she would’ve said something about her crushing on me sooner.
You know, if you fall on the "friend zone" that's your own fault for not having the guts to ask the person out from the very beggining; people tend to involve with their crush romantically covering it all with "friendship" and that's no different from a wolf wearing a sheep cloak; the only thing you'll gain from that is looking like a clown and you'll definitely loose a very good friend.
I guarantee you that that person will appreciate your honesty and not wasting their time building up a friendship that you didn't had the intention to nurture from the very beggining, it's a pretty shitty thing to do to someone.
And in case that they are not into you then accept it and move on and do whatever you want with the time that you saved for yourself and the other person.
In my opinion, it is not very good for you to ask a person to start a relationship without first having gotten to know them better. Personally, I like to start with a friendly relationship first, since I usually fall in love with someone, If I know him in a good way, I'm not a fan of falling in love at first sight, and that also happens with other women and even with some men, it is preferable to first get to know the person and form a connection before first having a love relationship, of course the problem is that you have the possibility of being in the friend zone, but I think that this can be avoided if you see your crush from the beginning also as a possible friend, not only using him/ her to get a partner, and if you can't, well the best thing would be to get away from that relationship, although another way to conquistate him/ her over by having in the start a friendly relationship would be to try to show him/ her more loving emotions, so he/she can notice that there is something else there.
@@teddybear7200 You don't have to start the relationship from the very beggining of course that you need to get to know them first, the whole point is that you make them aware that you want to form a bond with a romantical goal in a non-decieving way.
No, They are just abandonet you! 😂
@@rocataurus4414just curious, how would you go by making them aware that you actually have romantic feelings for that person in a way that is not deceitful
@@united1super544it’s easy if your a woman just kiss us
I already learned this the hardway after learning that the girl I was attached to is dating another guy and found a new friend circle that she didn't introduce me to.
The editing on this video is masterclass
Okay now they wanna stick
Bro you deserve more likes and subscribers you earned my Sub your content is so good to a point where it gave me a bit of understanding to stuff that's been bottling up so tnx for this advice 👍
Now this is a fire video, nice work and thank you
Awesome content man!!!
I think you made a lot of great points and doled out some good advice on the topic, though I think a minute could have been taken to give a bit of advice to the lads that are actively being manipulated to stay in the friendzone by women sprinkling just enough hope and attention to keep them deliberately trapped. I think most dudes have the sense to just move on when in this situation. It's when they're being clawed back into the zone when they try to escape that it becomes a hazard to their life and prospects.
The friend zone is really in your head. Stop giving energy to someone who's not going to give that same amount of energy back. Accept she just doesn't like you like that and either continue being her actual friend with no expectations from her or remove her from your life and move on. Honestly no judgment for the latter. Anything else and you are setting yourself up to get your feelings hurt and manipulated.
Not every main character in movies or TV shows get to have a happily ever after with an unrequited love interest, and that's okay. Take Quasimodo from Disney's The Hunchback of Notre Dame for example: he was infatuated with Esmeralda who was kind and friendly to him; he doubted that he would have his feelings for her reciprocated due to his physical appearance. Unfortunately for him, Esmeralda was attracted to someone else, Phoebus, who saw her prior to Quasimodo meeting her. When he saw the two of them kiss right in front of him, it broke him. Eventually tho, towards the end of the movie, Quasi was kind and heroic enough to accept Esmeralda as a friend and nothing more, and humbly let her be with Phoebus. He didn't need a girl's love to make him happy, he just wanted to be accepted into society, and that was good enough for him. Luckly, he got with another girl, Madelline, who did reciprocate his feelings and loved him for who he is in The Hunchback of Notre Dame II.
Fuck, I wish someone loved me like quasi. I’m not even ugly, good looking in fact. And yet, sometimes I feel like women are just intimidated by my menacing aura…
They don’t even look at me. It’s as if they’re scared to look at me
@@LilXancheX I'm kinda in the same situation as you, like I have the resting “beach” face problem and usually a quiet person, maybe that's why none of them will ever approach me 🤷. Doesn't help my lack of confidence and inferiority complex at all.
Contrast this with Frollo's reaction; When Esmeralda rejected him, instead of accepting that Esmeralda wasn't even remotely interested in him, he decided to burn the entirety of Paris in what amounts to a temper tantrum in an attempt to not only kill the gypsies, but also Esmeralda in order to get revenge.
In other words, Quasimodo handled his rejection gracefully and moved on, eventually finding love with a girl who does reciprocate his feelings, Frollo handled it like a bratty child throwing a toy away the moment the toy doesn't behave as he wants, eventually dying surrounded by a hell of his own making.
The “ you’re so adorable “ is exactly what my crush said to me
in summary: the friendzone isnt a place or situation, it's a mindset
hi as a woman, i appreciate this video cuz it helps me better understand the guy's perspective in this... but i will say (despite ur gender) if someone says that you should change something about your CHARACTER (not ur personality, not ur hobbies, not ur values, but your character), that may be something to consider, espeically if mulitple r saying it or if you feel like "all women don't like me".
the amounts of times that i have met men who say "i just need to find someone who will accept me as me" and refuse to work on themselves and become better people (ex: not apologizing, persistently lying, always taking shit about people, not respecting boundaries, not loving themselves so much to the point that they treat the people around them poorly)... like no! that is not when you just hope that someone will accept the fact that you are an asshole. You take responsibility and try to become a better person!!
yes changing who you are for a girl or a guy or whoever in the sense of your personality, hobbies, physique, etc. can be a rough topic; it's much rather to find someone who accepts all that for you. but if ppl list things as mentioned above, that's not on the people you're interested in. thats on you. thats on me.
ngl, this was actually an eye opener. In the sense that I never thought of it that way.
Good video man. You're doing God's work
Me personally anytime I find myself in a friendship with a woman that has no signs of progressing I cut her off then move on that stops her from manipulating my feelings for her benefit the way I see if the relationship aren’t on terms we mutually agree on tf is she still doing in my life?
A world of options? dude I mean you're kinda right but it's not product choosing. When you're into someone you can't just stick out. you're just gonna hurt others because you're still into the previous person. I'm experiencing this shit rn and can't really help thinking about that person.
It takes time to move on. Is she really worth your own life?
I mean when I think about it, yea kinda. But ur right
Dude there's a whole world outside that needs to be discovered. My situation, after the day of dating her, I confessed to her my feelings and that was a big rejection on my face. Yeah, I moved on. It damn hurt and all you need to do is get through man, that how humanity nowadays works. It's up to you man, good luck!
@mrglantisgaming1576 Oh man I feel ya. I haven't yet confessed and in the back of my mind I know it would be a rejection at the end of the day- but I kinda- of can't accept that. And yet still I'm too scared to confess my feelings. So I'm just wasting my time without knowing if it's worth it or not
I would add something
Sometimes is when you don't care about the friendzone that the girl you like will find attraction for you
In my experiences, after being "friendzoned" I simply decided to be a friend, behave like that and move on. It happened that the same girl that "friendzoned" me kissed me days later.
Because you made it clear that your available to her and that works out sometimes when you let the thought simmer in the woman’s mind but sometimes they do like people they friendzone but their reactionary response is no
hey king, you dropped this 👑 glad i found this video, thanks bro
Thank god I am too impatient to embark in a friend zone.
this saved me right now, thank you king💯
- You can leave the friend zone
is not the same as
- The friend zone doesn't exist.
Pride is deadly over time. Try to recognize where your own pride is hurting you
going along with the micheal jordan quote, mine is "I fear nothing but fear itself, and fear = triple nickel girls"
KING this is so true thank you for this sent this to a homie hope it helps hom
Appreciate you king👑
7:19 Well thats all I need to hear you got my subscription
“Finn shows his heroic actions in the Land of Ooo”
*Also Finn:* 4:23
Who's the numnut who needs this video man
0:51 Wow, that is a soul-crushingly exhaustive collection of friendzoning statements.
Did you gather all these voice clips yourself?
Or did you find either a playlist or a supercut from someone else?
This is why I've never been in the friendzone. I move on immediately because I want someone who wants me and I have self worth.
I agree The Friendzone technically exists and doesn’t exist. It only exists if you stay there. Never be friends with a woman, especially if it was one that you liked very much. She’s just going to use you for your energy, attention, and time. Even if she’s being genuine, you’re not gonna talk to her much anyway because you can’t pursue masculine hobbies with her like you can with your Bros. All of that time which could be used on another woman who has higher interest in you. A woman wanting to be friends with you after you date her it’s just cap. Example I was dating a Mexican cutie pie but after we dated a few times, she said she was only interested in being friends and I said OK and then I never talked to her again. If she truly wanted to be my friend, she would’ve followed up and asked to hang out or something or how am i doing? That’s why this whole thing is disingenuous because she just wanted to store me away like a bottle of wine and crack me open and drink away my attention. The whole concept of having friends of the opposite sex is a scam anyway because eventually either you’re gonna wanna hook up with her and she’s not interested or she’s gonna wanna hook up with you and you’re not interested (I know some people are gonna say that’s not possible and they would bang any girl if given, the chance but if you have a girl that’s a friend there’s generally a big reason why that is).
All of those quotes be hurting bro
[4:20] Ah, yes... One of Finn's most heroic deeds!
Interesting outlook, I can totally see it.
This is an amazing video man lol
I been friend zoned, and most importantly, i expected her to do so. I figured to save myself the trouble of pain and get it over with.
Does it hurt? Yes
Will it forever? Not really
More like it matures along with you.
In the end, i see it now as a blessing in disguise, a act of mercy if you will.
Just because she doesn't feel the way to me as i to her, doesn't mean i dont matter to her. Keep in mind that there other people (girls or boys) would be more harsh and mean in rejection of your romantic feelings, among that compares that the friend zone is more a sweet and gentle to the heart.
"You remind me of my little sister" is a whole other can of worms we didn't need to open 💀
LMFAOOOO
This kinda happened to me a few months ago. So I was friends with this girl who I thought was really cool, but she was dating a friend of mine, so naturally I didn't feel anything for her. After some time they broke up and we started chatting more and I started to like her a bit, we even went out on a couple of dates together. My feelings for her grew and it got to the point were I just had to tell her. She understood and was cool about it, but she obviously didn't like me back and she actually got back together with my friend. I got sad and felt a bit used to be honest, but I understood that my feelings for her were more because I was feeling lonely and not much because I did like her. So I took my time and didn't talk to her for like a month or so. Eventually I reached out to her and we became friends again. I realized i wanted to keep her as a friend because of how much she meant to me, but I didn't want to be with her because we just weren't that compatible in that regard. I don't have romantic feelings for her anymore, but we are still close and have a good friendship. So my word of advice to anyone that is going through something similar would be to just let your feelings go and move on, even if it may take you some time, so that maybe in the end you still have a good friendship.
Fire video king. Thank you. Liked and subbed
Friendzone does and doesn't exist like you said. It's a prison of your own emotional making that you need to leave to become better. Giving up isn't always the right thing but in this case it is
Nah
A very insightful video, I'm glad I came across this
Love your content bro fr
LMAOOOO THE MICHAEL JACKSON PART
@@1hundred1 thanks my boi but yeah that MJ thing can’t happen again😭
Another thing very important to point out is that if you're constantly thinking about the risks of getting friendzoned this will make you act more insecure, the thought will hunt you like a ghost. But it's not real, you're letting it take place. That doesn't mean you have a chance with everybody, sometimes you get "friendzoned" because of compatibility issues. Maybe you're great for girl A and B, but if you like girl C and she doesn't like you... Well, that's life, sometimes we're lucky, sometimes we're not. Anyways, always learn from this experience and don't get traumatized by some random girl standards. Like the wise man in the video said, move on.
My take on the "Friendzone" is it's a mental block you put on yourself due to your unreciprocated feelings for someone. To truly get out of the Friendzone is to acknowledge your worth and simply move on. That's what I did.