My favorite cliche about shark movies is when people are perfectly safe on a boat, see the shark and then all stand up, start screaming and running around until one of them falls in.
'Fear not little humans, for ever since I was a pup I dreamed of being a wildlife conservationist. For you, my dear skinny Manatees, I shall cull the weak from your herd to keep your species strong.'
Funnily enough, when I was a kid, me and some friends were at a marina in Florida fishing from the edge (we were probably about 9-10 years old). We then saw this really big alligator swimming about 15 yards away, and a friend ran behind me, knocking me into the water. So there I was floundering and trying to claw my way out since I couldn't see the gator anymore, but luckily an adult had seen me go in and ran over to yank me out with a quickness.
Also, the Atlantic water, north of the equator, flows clockwise. Water flows from the Artic down past Norway, Scotland, Ireland, and England. So, water is too cold for swimming.
After reading Jaws in the 70s I was afraid to wash dishes, go to the bathroom, or otherwise come anywhere near water. After watching this shark I find a strange urge to go sailing in the North Sea.
Can confirm. My dad's from near Sunderland and despite living in London for over 50 years still regards umbrellas as effete and for the first year he was here thought that lager was just the southern word for shandy.
Jaws in Poland: "So there are sharks in Baltic Sea? No matter, sea is cold and we can't go due to poisonous algae" P.S. Yes, there are sharks in BS. They are quite peaceful and never near beaches as far as I know. But sometimes we have poisonous cyanobacteria
Shark (shivering) says: oi, lady you with the knitting - run me up a bennie & a gansey & I won't eat you - I PROMISE! (& Yes, I confess, I DID just look up those terms!)
I'm also from the north east, but I don't go into the sea because when you do you're also going into the food chain, and you are no where near the fucking top..... Geordie pragmatism right there. :)
I'm an American, and I appreciate your childhood😁 It was short though... But, I do hate umbrellas! Barely keep you dry, hand's freezing, what's the point...
As a Canadian non-swimmer with a degree in English literature, I can confirm that swimming (struggling then drowning) in the frigid sea not so far from the burial site of the Venerable Bead would not be my first stop of choice when visiting England.
I live in the states but grew up in a fishing village and never could understand why tourists would insist on opening umbrellas near the ocean. We would try to guise how far they would get dragged off by their nice, new, shiny umbrella. You would've thought the fact that not one shop in the village sold umbrellas would've told them something? But every year they would come with their shiny new umbrella and every time they'd be dragged away or nearly boxed to death by the stupid thing. Oh well, made the day more interesting for us kids. Now it really would be funny if one of them tried that while out on tour with one of the fishing boats...lol!!! " Dummy overboard!!!Throw him a line; naw, toss him an umbrella he can parasail back to shore!" I would've liked to see that😆
@@pancake_crab4457 🤣 love it! My son, the first time he ever saw someone with an umbrella, pulled at my sweater and said look Momma, it's Mary Poppins for real! I think he was 3 years old. He asked the lady if he could ask her umbrella a question.
@@Merilirem And due to the depiction of mermaids in classical art as female I would expect gay sailors to have a pretty decent survivability. But it seems like that has changed now.
I remember moving from Swansea to Blyth when I was about 6 years old. From Swansea, where the already warm gulf Stream waters flowed over two miles of warm sand as the tide rose 20ft or more and was warm all year round, to Blyth in darkest Geordieland, where the sea temperature in the North Sea seemed to hover around freezing all the time. The first time I went to the beach up North, I ran into the water as usual and came straight back out again. I was so long until I braved it again that I forgot how to swim*. I eventually got used to it though and did eventually go swimming, even on days when there was a North Sea fog rolling in. *I re-learned when some "friends" chucked me off the Blyth pier. I now live in Australia and water temperature is the least of the problems, except for the far south in winter (Still warmer than Blyth in summer!).
Well, sharks tend to favor temperate waters, and north-east of England doesn't really qualify. The shark would spend about ten minutes around the area, then say, "Screw this! It's too flipping COLD! I'm going to head SOUTH. The coast of Africa sounds nice this time of year!" And the shark leaves. Ten minutes to the movie, tops.
@@karazor-el6085 ... no one asked, . plus you do get sharks in the uk you do realise this its an easy google search... hell even the arctic has a shark, greenland has a traditional dish based on it called Hákarl
@@honeywasp7839 I DID say "tends to favor," not "can only be found"... Also, "Great white sharks live in almost all coastal and offshore waters which have water temperature between 12 and 24 °C (54 and 75 °F), with greater concentrations in the United States (Northeast and California), South Africa, Japan, Oceania, Chile, and the Mediterranean including Sea of Marmara and Bosphorus." Which means, nowhere near England. (That's what I found with MY Google search.)
@@karazor-el6085 i never said you found great whites in the uk did I- i just said shark... again NO ONE ASKED for your pub quiz knowledge on sharks you are just looking for attention at this point
@@yuriythebestI can't speak for Geordies but as a Scottish Scotsman that grew up on the west coast of Scotchland; the only men that ever have an umbrella to hand are the golfers. And they are practically beach parasols in their sturdiness. Not like those dainty fairy umbrellas that turn inside out on your gran when she exits the post office. The constant mix of gale force winds and horizontal rain are to be endured. They shaped generations of my families face into a permanent grimace, and even though I left those shores over a decade ago; I still look like I just pulled a lobster trap out of the surf with my teeth.
@@yuriythebest in the UK and Ireland umbrellas are practically useless. the wind is too strong and the rain is always on and off anyway so you'd be putting up and taking it down every 5 minutes. almost no one I know has ever even considered bringing an umbrella anywhere. here raining is the neutral state of things, you just learn to endure it.
This is why Brits and Irish folk say "Get in the sea!" as an insult. In the USA we LIKE the sea and get in it even when it's far to cold and dangerous.
"Get in the sea"? Eh? Never heard that one! I think it's something you've just made up. And for your information Britain and Ireland are islands, so we are never far from the sea and we flock to it whenever we can.
For context the brits loveeeeeeee to head for the sea . Its a national obsession and a real event to the point we base all our holidays on heading towards the seaside . Children in cars play the whos first to see the sea game ,,,,,, i cant be arsed to express further . Theres a pull , a drama thats built in to the English ( the real English ) , a desire to head out to the wet stuff thats not easy to explain . Being 3+ hours from the sea is always something thats troubled me to my soul ..... i suspect you dont get that in other peoples .
So it’s too windy for umbrellas? Or is it an image thing? I’m afraid i don’t understand. I’m in CA so we don’t use umbrellas for other reasons- no rain!
@@SonOfTheOne111 You can wear an umbrella out up North from the rain. They all have waterproof skin anyways so they are a bit pointless. As for the wind, well, you can fart up there and smell it 50 miles away about a minute later.
This showed up in my recommended and after 10 seconds of watching I AM SOLD.... This is absolute gold and now I must binge every single other video this God has made.... SUBSCRIBED!
"We're gonna need a bigger boat." "Ay, of course you do. That's the north sea. Not some quaint little loch you had around your grandma's house when you were 12. There are actual monsters in there."
Geordie sounds oddly similar to rural Vermont, but the phrase "Shark chattin' us up, you see'n 'nis?" would have a hard R sound and at least two swear words.
To be fair it would normally be more like "Fukkin' daft cunt Shark chattin'uz up, yuz see'n this? Hadaway ya gilled fishie shite!" but I think he toned it down for youtube.
@@latsnojokelee6434 Viking DNA has nothing to with gingerness. You would find more gingers in British Islands than in Scandinavia. That because of proto-celtic inhabitants.
Here in the Pacific Northwest, if we see someone with an umbrella, they are definitely a tourist and therefore a pansy when it come to rain. Hoodies are also left down. We are all part Duck here.
Last time I was in Newcastle upon Tyne, I, an American, was walking around with an umbrella because it was pouring buckets of rain. I was probably pressing my luck.
@@jordan_roadhouse4798 If your hair is curly, the tangled afro your hair turns into the second a drop of water hits it. But as an English person, haven’t like, 80% of your ancestors been taken out by ‘catching a chill’? You’d think you would all carry umbrellas!
Oh poor Martin Brody, He needs a bigger boat, He took himself down to see if owt was left afloat, He said he found a basking shark (at least I think that’s what he said...), and the fight to shoot the scuba tank in it left the baskin’ dead.
But what of old Quint, that crusty old salt? The Orca was lost, but it wasn't his fault. Lived through Indianapolis, more lucky than most, Went down like a man off the Amity coast. But he lost it all there, though he well knew the game. Farewell, and adieu, to you ladies of Spain.
It would be two hours of people drunkenly falling off boats and explaining they wanted to wrestle a shark. No shark is ever seen, but it was at least *T H I S B I G.*
@@Alpostpone The shark would wake up the next day with a massive hangover from consuming all the drunks, and a sore arse from all the vindaloo they had eaten.
back in the day I got caught in the rain walking from my car to work I got ragged on because I was soaking wet but still men using umbrellas get the side eye
@@MartijnTenebris people use them but I first heard of the stigma when the military banned them // General Wickham ''feel the image of male Army officers walking around with umbrellas is somehow intrinsically unmilitary.'//
OK I have to admit I clicked because of the AWESOMENESS of the Ginger hair. My husband says I'm obsessed with Gingers. Since I married one, we just celebrated our 26th wedding anniversary, I can honestly say that he's correct 🤔😏🤣. Our youngest, a daughter, and only red headed child has finally learned to love being a Unicorn 🦄😁
Your daughter and husband have a superpower. Their body can make its own vitamin D when needed, without any sunlight. If a redhead has blue eyes also, it is the rarest hair/eye colour combination in the world!
👏 Brilliant. In the Southern U.S., JAWS would be a couple of hillbillies drinking beer all day on a boat. A shark fin appears, and begins circling the boat. Failing to shoot it (despite emptying 1200 rounds into the water), one guy looks at the other and says, “Ahm onna ride that thang”.
You funny bastard, you just popped up on my home page with NO warning - I thought, crikey, I'll check this weird bloke out and see what's up. I loved it so much I have subscribed!! Haha...Cheers from Oz! 🦘
if the last year has taught us anything, it's that no matter how much we don't want to go in the sea, the moment a scientist says 'don't go in the sea', a lot of people will suddenly want to go in the sea more than they've ever wanted anything.
@@timopper5488 nah, that wouldn't work, mate! You hafta take their rights away. Like so- I'm a scientist. You can no longer give me your money because studies show that it will leave you destitute and the economy will collapse. Your money must stay quarantined in your possession.
As a marine biologist I can confirm the accuracy of the sharks accent.
Costanza?
fuckin jotaro kujo is here
Yet another benefit of being a marine biologist
You’re more a c**t than biologist mate
I know, right!? Uncanny!
As a sailor I can confirm the sight of this magnificently maned and bearded bloke frolicking in the waves would lure me to my death.
Happens to the best of us mate
Same here... 🤤
Let me guess... You got better?
Beats skate wings!!!
Yep. Sounds like a real sailor alright.
The shark CGI is incredible! I felt physically endangered.
I know right.? It was like being there, I got chills🤣🤣🤣🤣
@@purplebutterflies6824 :D
@@purplebutterflies6824 Right. I think Alasdair will be playing the shark in the 2022 Hollywood remake.
I’d like to apologize profusely for temporarily reading your name as Mike Bloomfield
That was CGI??? I thought it was real
My favorite cliche about shark movies is when people are perfectly safe on a boat, see the shark and then all stand up, start screaming and running around until one of them falls in.
Darwin in Action.
'Fear not little humans, for ever since I was a pup I dreamed of being a wildlife conservationist. For you, my dear skinny Manatees, I shall cull the weak from your herd to keep your species strong.'
@wolemai Dude, you can't just spoil the opening scene of the next Sharknado like that.
@@webbowser8834 sharknado n+1: this time, the sharks jump into the humans
Funnily enough, when I was a kid, me and some friends were at a marina in Florida fishing from the edge (we were probably about 9-10 years old). We then saw this really big alligator swimming about 15 yards away, and a friend ran behind me, knocking me into the water. So there I was floundering and trying to claw my way out since I couldn't see the gator anymore, but luckily an adult had seen me go in and ran over to yank me out with a quickness.
"The beaches are black with coaldust and people are white with grievances" never heard a geordie sounding so sane before
It could be a line in a novel
@@dianakosianka5344 it should be!
Benefits of classical education (see also Marxist indoctrination).
@@mrfarkyhars9192 good one :)
That line was class. Got me a new channel to sub to.
Shark: Come in the water
Geordie: No.
Shark: I've got chips.
Hot chips in cold weather sign me up
Are they nuclear infused chips? Cause if they are many might be tempted, for those fission chips.
Ooooh, you're Good!
Make it, Fish 'n Chips, and, I'm in.
@@sillililli01 ahh, but the shark IS a fish.
Jaws Tagline: You'll never go into the water again
Geordie: "That's all right, I never planned to"
@ATM Baer *alreet
Niva went in the watta anyway, it's Ower caad
The unintentional luring of sailors to their deaths must be a heavy burden to bear.
Uneasy lies the head that wears a crown, my dude.
Think of the salvage, though.
Great way to get a few wallets though.
Also, the Atlantic water, north of the equator, flows clockwise. Water flows from the Artic down past Norway, Scotland, Ireland, and England. So, water is too cold for swimming.
Shark: "come into the water"
Beachgoer: "No."
The End.
Yep. Just watched the same clip, strangely enough!
@@dunruden9720 What a coincidence, so did I!
@@dunruden9720 didn't ask g
@@rld8258shut up doomer
You brave and magnificent hero
Sharks aren’t even the deadliest thing in the North Sea.
The North Sea takes that honor.
RAISE THE ANCHOR
BATTLESHIP'S PLOTTING ITS COURSE
@@akosleoszilagyi2529 NICE!
@@akosleoszilagyi2529 Hell yeah dude
@@kiwiboi189 TO LEAD THE WAR MACHINE! TO RULE THE WAVES AND LEAD THE KRIEGSMARINE! THE TERROR OF THE SEAS!
@@akosleoszilagyi2529 Swordfish torpedo bomber: nice rudder you got there, be a shame if it got......damaged so your constantly going round in circles
After reading Jaws in the 70s I was afraid to wash dishes, go to the bathroom, or otherwise come anywhere near water. After watching this shark I find a strange urge to go sailing in the North Sea.
When I was half-asleep, I was afraid to let my foot dangle out oof bed in case a carpet-shark got it.
Can confirm. My dad's from near Sunderland and despite living in London for over 50 years still regards umbrellas as effete and for the first year he was here thought that lager was just the southern word for shandy.
Honestly it would be more like:
10 seconds into the film...
Jaws: "Fuck this it's piss'n cold out here..."
Jaws in Poland: "So there are sharks in Baltic Sea? No matter, sea is cold and we can't go due to poisonous algae"
P.S. Yes, there are sharks in BS. They are quite peaceful and never near beaches as far as I know. But sometimes we have poisonous cyanobacteria
Shark (shivering) says: oi, lady you with the knitting - run me up a bennie & a gansey & I won't eat you - I PROMISE!
(& Yes, I confess, I DID just look up those terms!)
The shark is named "Bruce"
@@florencepierce1864 shucks. Now I have to look those terms up!
@@Petaurista13 the sharks don't come close to the shore, they can't stand the cries of popcorn sellers
"Who're you, Elton John?"
That line got me more than it probably should have.
more the polite way of putting someone calling them a soft shite lol
UA-cam would let him say poofdah
for when you wanna call somebody gay, but not sound homophobic
Well it works cos' it's not just Elton John is gay as he's super super flamboyent. Guy has these gold shoes that actually look really good.
William Shakespeare 😊
No idea why UA-cam recommended this, but having watched, my life it now complete.
Hilarious!
Same. And forced me to subscribe as well.
As an Alaskan and former Bering Sea fisherman scarred for life from seeing *JAWS* at a drive-in when I was 3, I approve this message.
I thought it was just me that was scarred for life seeing it at 13 years old. 😮
this is incredible, lived in the north east all my life and never go in t sea cos it's too bloody cold int it
I'm also from the north east, but I don't go into the sea because when you do you're also going into the food chain, and you are no where near the fucking top.....
Geordie pragmatism right there. :)
Wasn't expecting Poketube here, haha. Glad this channel is getting wide attention.
I went plodjin in the sea at South Shields once and it was so cold my toes fell off. Luckily I was wearing wellies so I didn't lose them.
The people must be made of harder stuff than me. I won’t go in without a wet suit on.
Poor you. I'm from Portugal, and the beaches by the south of Algarve are just perfect👌🏼for a hot summer day.
I MADE my American husband and my Londoner daughter watch this just so they can appreciate a smidgen of my childhood.
I'm an American, and I appreciate your childhood😁 It was short though... But, I do hate umbrellas! Barely keep you dry, hand's freezing, what's the point...
I too, appreciate your childhood.
Is that you Emily Blunt!??!???!
Here in Ireland we too don't believe in umbrellas as it rains 24/7
@@miawallace2306 ah yes, famous geordie...*checks notes* ... Emily Blunt
0:08 "Where the beaches are BLACK with coal dust, and the people are WHITE with grievances" underrated line 😆
I was on the East Coast of Scotland and made it into the North Sea up to my waist once and it took a week until my tackle saw daylight again...
Now I can't wait for the sequel!
I did not expect the Bonsai master himself here
@@plants_before_people5329 Always expect the unexpected!
I hope that ponce losses his umbrella
It becomes a horror movie for the shark after he goes on land.
Even better, when the third one gets released in 3D!
- Are you using an umbrella?
- Mm. Yes.
- Into the sea you go.
- No it's cold out there
As a Canadian non-swimmer with a degree in English literature, I can confirm that swimming (struggling then drowning) in the frigid sea not so far from the burial site of the Venerable Bead would not be my first stop of choice when visiting England.
Real men stand in the rain where nobody can see them cry
I live in the states but grew up in a fishing village and never could understand why tourists would insist on opening umbrellas near the ocean. We would try to guise how far they would get dragged off by their nice, new, shiny umbrella. You would've thought the fact that not one shop in the village sold umbrellas would've told them something? But every year they would come with their shiny new umbrella and every time they'd be dragged away or nearly boxed to death by the stupid thing. Oh well, made the day more interesting for us kids. Now it really would be funny if one of them tried that while out on tour with one of the fishing boats...lol!!!
" Dummy overboard!!!Throw him a line; naw, toss him an umbrella he can parasail back to shore!" I would've liked to see that😆
Blade runner?
Colonel Mustang, is that you?
@@mistyrosemcconnell9586 We're just trying to fly like Mary Poppins. Don't judge us.
@@pancake_crab4457 🤣 love it! My son, the first time he ever saw someone with an umbrella, pulled at my sweater and said look Momma, it's Mary Poppins for real! I think he was 3 years old. He asked the lady if he could ask her umbrella a question.
OMG you DO look like a painting of a mermaid or siren... just, you know, beardy.
I guess there have to be mermaids to lure gay sailors to their death too
@@vyl4650 Also heterosexual female ones. They did exist though many were pirates and alike.
@@Merilirem but they were usually on a boat full of men. And at least one of them probably did the trick for her
@@vyl4650 Ahem "Gay Sailors". Statistically any decent sized boats going to have more than one.
Not to mention Sirens didn't much care either way.
@@Merilirem And due to the depiction of mermaids in classical art as female I would expect gay sailors to have a pretty decent survivability. But it seems like that has changed now.
I liked the totally believable and honest portrayal of a hungry shark in the sea
It would be an easy kill after dining out on a drunk geordie
Why, no.
😅
Could stop staring at this guy's hair! It's magnificent!!!
I remember moving from Swansea to Blyth when I was about 6 years old. From Swansea, where the already warm gulf Stream waters flowed over two miles of warm sand as the tide rose 20ft or more and was warm all year round, to Blyth in darkest Geordieland, where the sea temperature in the North Sea seemed to hover around freezing all the time. The first time I went to the beach up North, I ran into the water as usual and came straight back out again. I was so long until I braved it again that I forgot how to swim*. I eventually got used to it though and did eventually go swimming, even on days when there was a North Sea fog rolling in.
*I re-learned when some "friends" chucked me off the Blyth pier.
I now live in Australia and water temperature is the least of the problems, except for the far south in winter (Still warmer than Blyth in summer!).
"I tend to lure sailors to their death" is now my favorite quote from a redhead with a beard.
shark: dun dun
person in their house: "bit nippy out today innit?!"
Well, sharks tend to favor temperate waters, and north-east of England doesn't really qualify. The shark would spend about ten minutes around the area, then say, "Screw this! It's too flipping COLD! I'm going to head SOUTH. The coast of Africa sounds nice this time of year!"
And the shark leaves. Ten minutes to the movie, tops.
@@karazor-el6085 ... no one asked,
.
plus you do get sharks in the uk you do realise this its an easy google search... hell even the arctic has a shark, greenland has a traditional dish based on it called Hákarl
@@honeywasp7839 I DID say "tends to favor," not "can only be found"...
Also, "Great white sharks live in almost all coastal and offshore waters which have water temperature between 12 and 24 °C (54 and 75 °F), with greater concentrations in the United States (Northeast and California), South Africa, Japan, Oceania, Chile, and the Mediterranean including Sea of Marmara and Bosphorus." Which means, nowhere near England. (That's what I found with MY Google search.)
@@karazor-el6085 i never said you found great whites in the uk did I- i just said shark... again NO ONE ASKED for your pub quiz knowledge on sharks you are just looking for attention at this point
No one in the northeast says innit
I think the geordies would be busy going "Bloody hell, a talking shark!?"
"Eh, I've heard weirder..."
As a Southerner I found this 44 second burst highly refreshing keep it up.
Ditto! The humor is genius.
Came for the Jaws parody, stayed for the umbrella commentary.
why is it considered uncool to use umbrellas there? seems weird...
@@yuriythebestI can't speak for Geordies but as a Scottish Scotsman that grew up on the west coast of Scotchland; the only men that ever have an umbrella to hand are the golfers.
And they are practically beach parasols in their sturdiness. Not like those dainty fairy umbrellas that turn inside out on your gran when she exits the post office.
The constant mix of gale force winds and horizontal rain are to be endured. They shaped generations of my families face into a permanent grimace, and even though I left those shores over a decade ago; I still look like I just pulled a lobster trap out of the surf with my teeth.
@@yuriythebest in the UK and Ireland umbrellas are practically useless. the wind is too strong and the rain is always on and off anyway so you'd be putting up and taking it down every 5 minutes. almost no one I know has ever even considered bringing an umbrella anywhere. here raining is the neutral state of things, you just learn to endure it.
Man looks like a legendary medieval painting
He does! He also looks like all of the painting renditions of Jesus, except with red hair.
Aside from featuring just an INCREDIBLY beautiful man, these have been hilarious and I love them.
A true geordie would go in up to his ankles and say, “By, it’s canny warm in here, mind.”
In Scarborough you just have to put chips over the shark and let the seagulls they care of it
In Whitby when the swing bridge breaks we just cover it in chips and the gulls lift it open.
@@repletereplete8002
You left out the part where you put Gorilla glue on the bridge.
In Scarborough don't the sharks get washed halfway into town with those bloody high waves?
@@thefurrybastard1964 yeah exactly, why d’you think they need all the seagulls for? 😂
@@davidvasey5065 As a holiday destination I've always enjoyed Scarborough.
Luring sailors to their death!
Arrrgh. We wants the readhead!!
By freezing them to death
Maybe if he was wearing a Frock.
This is why Brits and Irish folk say "Get in the sea!" as an insult. In the USA we LIKE the sea and get in it even when it's far to cold and dangerous.
Never heard that ... but then again im as far away from the wet stuff as its possible to be in the UK so ?
To be fair, in the US you could potentially go your whole life without seeing the ocean.
@@drake8050 No. We all flock to every coast! I’m from the Midwest.
"Get in the sea"? Eh? Never heard that one! I think it's something you've just made up. And for your information Britain and Ireland are islands, so we are never far from the sea and we flock to it whenever we can.
For context the brits loveeeeeeee to head for the sea . Its a national obsession and a real event to the point we base all our holidays on heading towards the seaside .
Children in cars play the whos first to see the sea game ,,,,,, i cant be arsed to express further . Theres a pull , a drama thats built in to the English ( the real English ) , a desire to head out to the wet stuff thats not easy to explain .
Being 3+ hours from the sea is always something thats troubled me to my soul ..... i suspect you dont get that in other peoples .
This needs to blow up. Best laugh I've had for a while. Well done!
Umbrellas in the North are for people trying to fly.
That not only holds true for the islands
Pretty much. I don't use them beyond at work and I have to change the outside bins and it's raining. And then it nearly took off many times.
So it’s too windy for umbrellas? Or is it an image thing? I’m afraid i don’t understand. I’m in CA so we don’t use umbrellas for other reasons- no rain!
@@SonOfTheOne111 You can wear an umbrella out up North from the rain. They all have waterproof skin anyways so they are a bit pointless. As for the wind, well, you can fart up there and smell it 50 miles away about a minute later.
@@SonOfTheOne111 It's too windy. They take off. Either the umbrella is flying or you are if you hold it. It's safer getting wet.
"Alasdair, don't go in the sea!"
"Ok."
The End.
We watched the same video?? Smaaaall worrrrrlllllld
This showed up in my recommended and after 10 seconds of watching I AM SOLD.... This is absolute gold and now I must binge every single other video this God has made.... SUBSCRIBED!
As a shark, I can confirm the validity of that umbrella.
This was your first video recommended to me.
Fecking mermaids, luring me in with their siren songs of blazing hair and comedy.
Here in Yorks we'd have the same reaction, but the shark would get called "you cheeky bugger"
Hahaha
tbh I can't understand what he calls the shark. Auto generated captions don't understand either. Please enlighten a New Yorker.
@Gizio the Jackal haha yes I know. I just thought I'd jump on the comment chain. Delightful accent!
@Gizio the Jackal thanks :)
You can go in the sea in Yorkshire. I've been to Scarborough, that was nice.
Thank You for existing! Please continue.
"and the people are white with grievances"
This is the most truthful line ever written
"We're gonna need a bigger boat."
"Ay, of course you do. That's the north sea. Not some quaint little loch you had around your grandma's house when you were 12. There are actual monsters in there."
@Gísiu Wulf Thank you for that one!
@Gísiu Wulf Of course we all have to try saying this with our best (we think) Scottish accent. If no one can understand it then we nailed it!
@Gizio So if a Border Scot and a Geordie meet, can they have a mutually comprehensible conversation? (Said as someone who claims Carr descent.)
The fact that the set-up for that whole Elton John joke was Jaws is amazing.
Thank you for this very much for this.
That was the funniest 44 seconds I’ve had in a while.
Nicely done Alasdair👏🏻👏🏻
The beaches of Northumberland are pristine !Cheeky bugger !
I was there in the 90s. I saw.
@@ABeckettKing Come back soon 👍😀
@@ABeckettKing Then you need to re visit and see again :)
@Gizio the Jackal Well said, Sir. Well said.
@Gizio the Jackal sssh this is a well kept secret for a reason
This man is beautiful and that's a fact.
Agreed
Amen to that
So am i. Also a fact.
Yeah, he looks like a king.
@@Voodoo_Robot You. Are. Sooo beautiful... To meeee
As a Geordie I can confirm this to be 100% accurate! ;-)
Finally, the most realistic 'Jaws' movie ever made.
Geordie sounds oddly similar to rural Vermont, but the phrase "Shark chattin' us up, you see'n 'nis?" would have a hard R sound and at least two swear words.
Well, some of the original settlers might have traced their origins to the Geordie area.
To be fair it would normally be more like "Fukkin' daft cunt Shark chattin'uz up, yuz see'n this? Hadaway ya gilled fishie shite!" but I think he toned it down for youtube.
Rural Vermont, one of the best places in the country!
@@observationsfromthebunker9639 Beat me to it
Can't get over the glorious redheaded gingerness.
The Viking DNA is strong in this one!
I love a ginger! ESP. One with a good sense of humor!
And no eyebrows. I'm intrigued. Best 44 seconds.
@@latsnojokelee6434 Viking DNA has nothing to with gingerness. You would find more gingers in British Islands than in Scandinavia. That because of proto-celtic inhabitants.
Here in the Pacific Northwest, if we see someone with an umbrella, they are definitely a tourist and therefore a pansy when it come to rain. Hoodies are also left down. We are all part Duck here.
I forgot your name but wanted to watch this specific sketch so I searched ‘ginger northerner comedy’ and this came up. Couldn’t be better pleased
The shark wouldn't go into that water any more than you would.
Last time I was in Newcastle upon Tyne, I, an American, was walking around with an umbrella because it was pouring buckets of rain. I was probably pressing my luck.
Guess you were lucky you didn’t get scalped......they’re a hard lot up North!
@@Bethi4WFH why don't they like umbrellas? Are they fond of being wet?
@@theravyshow2570
Bit soft init. What's wrong with a bit of rain?
@@jordan_roadhouse4798 Because it goes down your collar and inside without a brolly to divert it.
@@jordan_roadhouse4798 If your hair is curly, the tangled afro your hair turns into the second a drop of water hits it.
But as an English person, haven’t like, 80% of your ancestors been taken out by ‘catching a chill’? You’d think you would all carry umbrellas!
Fab cinematography, love your camera work
You’ve just earned yourself a new subscriber.
Oh poor Martin Brody,
He needs a bigger boat,
He took himself down to see if owt was left afloat,
He said he found a basking shark (at least I think that’s what he said...),
and the fight to shoot the scuba tank in it left the baskin’ dead.
But what of old Quint, that crusty old salt?
The Orca was lost, but it wasn't his fault.
Lived through Indianapolis, more lucky than most,
Went down like a man off the Amity coast.
But he lost it all there, though he well knew the game.
Farewell, and adieu, to you ladies of Spain.
If Jaws were set in Finland.
Protagonist: FINALY! A WORTHY OPPONENT!
It would be two hours of people drunkenly falling off boats and explaining they wanted to wrestle a shark. No shark is ever seen, but it was at least *T H I S B I G.*
Uhmm, no. I think they would just go "PERRRRKELE!"
I can picture a crazy Finn leaping into the water and trying to kill the shark with a puukko
@@Alpostpone The shark would wake up the next day with a massive hangover from consuming all the drunks, and a sore arse from all the vindaloo they had eaten.
Sharks are a bit scared of any mention of fins after that whole soup debacle.
There's so much to unpack here. Genius
This is the best thing I've seen on the internet all day. 10/10 ❤
I don’t trust people who uses umbrellas, it’s like hey have something to hide.
. i used to use a umbrella before going to school when i was young cuz sitting in wet clothes for 8 hours sucked.
back in the day I got caught in the rain walking from my car to work I got ragged on because I was soaking wet but still men using umbrellas get the side eye
@@Fatelvis2 men getting side eyed for using umbrellas is absolutely absurd. people who side eye that, clearly have a iq of a fish.
@@MartijnTenebris people use them but I first heard of the stigma when the military banned them // General Wickham ''feel the image of male Army officers walking around with umbrellas is somehow intrinsically unmilitary.'//
@@Fatelvis2 lmao some people are just moronic
Brilliant as usual. Any chance we can get a version of Ginger Jesus Christ Superstar?
You don't want to hear me singing.
@@ABeckettKing I was referring to the dying in horrible pain part. :)
@@ABeckettKing You have a voice. I swear singing would come to you with practise.
@@ABeckettKing Oh, but you're wrong...
@@ABeckettKing Good video! But are the North sea's beaches really black with coal dust?
Glorious stuff. For once the algorithm presented something I needed to see: Subscribed.
OK I have to admit I clicked because of the AWESOMENESS of the Ginger hair. My husband says I'm obsessed with Gingers. Since I married one, we just celebrated our 26th wedding anniversary, I can honestly say that he's correct 🤔😏🤣.
Our youngest, a daughter, and only red headed child has finally learned to love being a Unicorn 🦄😁
Your daughter and husband have a superpower. Their body can make its own vitamin D when needed, without any sunlight.
If a redhead has blue eyes also, it is the rarest hair/eye colour combination in the world!
I feel lucky that I never tried to sail anywhere near this gorgeous man.
good to see you social distancing in the sea.
This guy is a living legend....
SUBSCRIBED!....
Where I grew up, if a man had an umbrella, it was assumed he had a purse and perhaps a jar where the wife kept his nads.
“The people are white with grievances”
Damn, I feel like that this video was WAY more educational than intended.
Also string vests when it's -1 degrees C, and they'll be like :
"Ah pet ye goin swinnin to-neet?"
"nah I'll freeze me bollocks off man".
The best use of the internet yet, well done sir.
Tries to listen to what’s being said....too enamored with that glorious mane of hair.
If I had hair as beautiful and rare as his I’d try to make as much of it as possible too.
thank you for the laughter!
This is the second video I've seen of you today. I am now a subscriber.
What if The Amityville Horror were set in the North East of England?
Really enjoyed this video, thank you.
Realtor: "They say this house is haunted."
Me: "Sod this, mate, I'm off!"
The End.
Play School"..."
Me "i'm nay gan throo yon pitsa-shaped winda"
@@welcometotheshow6342 A what shaped window? What's a "pitsa" I got the rest, is it a toilet?
As a Geordie, I can confirm that this is 100% accurate
I’ve never heard of geordie before but feel nothing truer was ever spoken.
I didn't realize Seattleites and Geordies shared a common trait of judging people who use umbrellas.
👏 Brilliant. In the Southern U.S., JAWS would be a couple of hillbillies drinking beer all day on a boat. A shark fin appears, and begins circling the boat. Failing to shoot it (despite emptying 1200 rounds into the water), one guy looks at the other and says, “Ahm onna ride that thang”.
I love that literally half of the runtime was setup.
Ha ha ha ha Elton John! (excuse me, I laugh out bloody loud).
Ok, THAT is the coolest pic I've ever seen for a profile.
The siren joke in the beginning killed me, especially since I'm jealous of your beautiful copper locks.
You funny bastard, you just popped up on my home page with NO warning - I thought, crikey, I'll check this weird bloke out and see what's up. I loved it so much I have subscribed!! Haha...Cheers from Oz! 🦘
if the last year has taught us anything, it's that no matter how much we don't want to go in the sea, the moment a scientist says 'don't go in the sea', a lot of people will suddenly want to go in the sea more than they've ever wanted anything.
I’m a scientist. Please don’t give me all of your money, everyone who is reading this.
🤣🤣🤣🤣
@@timopper5488 🤣🤣🤣🤣
There speaks the voice of the Defender of the Orthodoxy. Not, you will note, the voice of the educated.
@@timopper5488 nah, that wouldn't work, mate! You hafta take their rights away. Like so-
I'm a scientist. You can no longer give me your money because studies show that it will leave you destitute and the economy will collapse. Your money must stay quarantined in your possession.
I am Indonesian, a country in South east asia
I didnt watch you or this kind of videos
But i'm glad youtube recomend this lol
The quality content I look for on UA-cam
Absolutely brilliant! This guy is fabulous
Keep war hair dry - nice Geordie there ;)
Somehow I'm not surprised a Geordie vid draws you in.
Who're you, Elton John?
*wor
@@ScootsMcDootson what did you say about my mother
What?
I hit like the second he said he has tendencies to draw sailors to their deaths.
As an Asian man living in Texas I can neither confirm nor deny this.
I like your commitment to the role by staying out of the sun for multiple lifetimes.