I have one huge husky and 4 kittens and thair mom and I have no idea why people think cats dont love back when I hear that I want to kill person that said that
My absolute favorite part of this video is the fact that, it’s counterpart, Sad Dog Diary, refers to the people as “dearest human”, whereas this one refers to them as “the authorities”. It’s perfect. Very accurate.
Dear Diary, The continuing antics of the authorities continue to vex me. I have made repeated attempts to establish proper sleeping positions on the bed but, in a show of sheer arrogance and spite, they have continually ousted me from my proper place at the center and insisted I rest at the foot of it, after they tuck in. The nerve. Out of desperation I enacted a last-ditch effort to plead my case by sitting on the authorities' faces last night. They threw me out of the room. I am now forced to sleep on the couch like a common beggar. My spirit is breaking.
Dear Diary. I made a great effort today to catch a small mouse. It took an hour. I wanted to show the authorities my trophy and let them see I am willing to carry my own weight around here and provide food. Alas, they took my hard-won trophy and placed it in the garbage. It’s just like the hairballs I give... they appreciate nothing I do
Well I would prefer the song of the people to the sound of kitty nails digging at the door to come in...or out ..no in then out lol. It's a good thing I adore the little shit. Cat's sure some people can live without them..( not me..cat addict for life) but it would be boring and colorless.
@@antipsychotic451 give me an example? Like how they want segregation for black students at colleges? Ooooh wait that’s right white liberals that want that, how bout the fact that voter is laws are racist? Because according to White liberals when interviewed they say Black people don’t have the mental fortitude to know where a dmv is or have access to phones or the internet? Or how bought a study done, where they discovered that white liberals dumb down their speech when talking to minorities, gues who it the same study they found didn’t dumb down their speech 100% of the time...... that’s right, conservatives, 😲 wow... conservatives view minorities as their equal!!! Liberals not so much! Oooh ooh how bout this one , Richard Spencer the most well known white supremacist in the USA voted for joe Biden and the democrats, because he said trump was doing to much for the black community, and he also likes that white liberals want to bring back segregation, he’s 109% on board with the democrats plan!!!! So I’d like some examples from you now, I’ll wait
Dear diary, The red dot has appeared again. It moves faster than I can imagine and seems to move unheeded across all surfaces. Despite the last 54 attempts, I will once again ruthlessly chase after it. It does not seem to be able to be caught, and disappears at will. Wish me luck.
Dear diary, It is 5 am on the day my human calls saturday but I feel since Ive have had plenty of sleep, so has he. I will use all of my efforts, vocal and physical to wake this slothful beast and get him up. I'm aware I dont need anything, I just want him up. After he rises, I will take that as an 'all is well' and I will immediately go back to sleep.
Dear Diary, I have been standing outside the authorities bedroom door for nearly 3 hours now, pawing ever so greatly and meowing quite loudly. The only result thus far is several loud screams, though I can not understand this primitive language, I can only assume it is cheering me on. I will continue to paw at the door.
SO MUCH YES! Nothing sexier than having a foil ball fly under the door and then constant meowing for someone to hit it back. Then when you open the door, the two cats want to come in and investigate what could have POSSIBLY been going on.
Dear Diary, For the past two months I have refused to eat nothing but turkey and giblets wet food, to the point where the authorities have stockpiled an enormous amount of it in the locked food room. Now, as per etiquette, I have decided I will not to eat the turkey and insist that I will eat only beef. Yet the authorities continue to supply me with the vile turkey mess. Apparently my culture means nothing to them, and so I'm afraid I shall never eat again.
Dear Diary, Zefrank still hasn't returned to UA-cam... It has been a lonely, depressing endeavor without him and yet his old videos has kept me going through these dark times. I will still hold out hope that he may return one day but that hope is slowly dwindling.
Grinning Videos Dear diary, I read a comment about zefrank on his cat diary video. While the video brought me great joy, the lack of new zefrank content portends to his continued absence. Seeing the collective yearning for his presence among the community gives me hope, but also begs the question, how long can hope last? Uun, this is too much. I shall pee on my bed for comfort.
I will stand guard as the human sleeps. There was a movement under the blanket I pounce My human yowls in pain. The creature has already harmed my human! The creature moves again and I pounce. It's yells again. I think I'll do this for the rest of the night to comfort my human.
Dear Diary, For weeks there have been whispers of a “diet,” and today it finally happened. I was given half-rations and I no longer have the energy to move more than 2 feet from my bowl. The road to perdition is much shorter than I thought.
Dear Diary, It has come to my attention that my human dies every day when the giant light bulb in the sky stop working. My ancestors told me of an ancient ritual to bring them back from the dead and so, I must paw him in the face every time the light bulb starts working again. My human do not seem aware of the phenomenon, as he throw me off the bed in anger everytime. There is no logic to such behaviour, but I must continue, or else I would starve to death.
Dear Diary. The authorities should feel better if I give them a message under their chin while they sleep. But instead of showing gratitude I was pushed off the bed and onto the floor. How inconsiderate. I will puke in his shoe.
Dear Diary, I have tried to communicate with The Authorities, but every time I said something, they responded in a high pitched voice, as if mocking my native tongue. As a result, I am elaborating on a plan to scratch out their eyelids, so they will never feel the comfort of sleep. Nothing has worked so far, but I will not give up. Wish me luck.
That's one of the best cat vids I've ever seen. It's just perfect. The language, syntax, everything. Sounds just like a cat would to me. Awesome job! This deserves a million likes!!
"Dear diary - I attempted to smother one of my captors by draping my body around his neck while he was sleeping, but he just praised me for being "cuddly". I will try again when he falls asleep after a heavy meal."
Having had two cats for 17 years, I can totally relate to this poor kitty's dilemma. Its even more hilarious with two working in tandem. They provided so much love and hilarity to my life that when they passed, I was really sad. I miss them still, but now have a cute little 15 lb dog who is fast filling that void. Its awesome how pets can provide so much comfort, love and affection in one's life.
Dear diary, I have decided to place a request for Them to make sequels to the sad pet diary videos. It has been over 7 years and I do believe it's past the time to continue this obviously unfinished saga... Now I can only hope that my plead does not fall on deaf ears or hateful souls... Here goes nothing... may fate smile upon us...
Dear diary The authorities have summoned some sort of tornado machine. I do not like it. It scares me. It makes such a terrible noise as it proceeds to destroy the multiple furry presents I left around the house for the authorities.oh how it mocks me.
I know that this is several years old. I know that it has 5 billion comments, however, I just wanted to say when I need a good chuckle I still come here and watch and listen to this again, and again and again!! Thank you!!
Dear Diary: The Old Lady that loves me and calls me "Tweetums," (ugh) does not like for me to give her massages, but I cannot stop, since it is my way of showing my appreciation for the things she does for me. She complains that the needles in my paws hurt, but she has got to accept that sometimes LOVE hurts.
"The authorities have closed the door... I can only assume that they have forgotten about me and left me here to die..." So dramatic... and so accurate. 🤣
sometimes I wonder if they're doing what I do when im up all night wanting to cuddle with someone down the hall. you think about it and think about it until eventually you're like, fuck it! im going to ask. walk to their door, *tap tap tap* (in a pitiful voice)"you wanna cuddle tonight?" they're like "im trying to sleep damnit" "ok............. :("
Dear diary, RuthAnn is legal now. I am devising my means on how to profess my love on the internet without sounding like a beta doofus which I have failed at miserably. I shall now resign myself to being her cat and standing outside her bedroom door and making my war chant so she hears my intentions. It has come to my attention that she believed this message was from a handsome male on the internet but she has no notion that I used my mental powers to take over his mind to write it out... since I can't talk... and since she still thinks I am a female. She has no understanding of cat gender and while this angers me it does not change my love. I love me... I am me.... and now I am... oh fuck it... where is my litter box...
Dear diary, I have caught myself a delicious morsel who was scurrying about so late in the hour. To my dismay, one of the authorities came down and saw the squirming treat in my mouth and proceeded to scream... quite loudly.... in fact, so loudly that I tried to calm her down with the song of my people, but had forgotten about the creature in my mouth. I will have to start the hunt anew again tomorrow night...
DetectiveTective What's worse then that is when my cat captures a bird and proceeds to bring it inside with the hopes of pleasing me. However the birds are not yet dead and start to fly around the house, screaming in pain and fear...
Jesus it was quite bad xD it took so long to catch it and im not sure if this was the right thing to do but i put it down. It had gone through all this pain im not sure if it would faction any more ;(.
The one and only time I closed the bedroom door my newly adopted tortoiseshell decided to climb up onto the stove somehow turn the knobs and tried to burn the building down! I love her dearly she's my little skinny mini Butterbean but I continue to live in fear... 😰
My cat did something similar but not bc I closed him out of the bedroom. The two cats I have like to jump on the stove but one day one of them jumped up there and hit the knob and managed to push it in and turn it and catch the pot holder on fire. Luckily I was right there and put it out. I now have child locks on our stove knobs. 🤨 we usually don’t lay pot holders or anything else flammable around our stove but sometimes it happens
@@user-mw6jo7ql1c You know! I told my family if they find me chopped up in the freezer don't believe the su*cide note it was Rose! She's reminds me of a capuchin monkey she's always got a scheme cooking in her head. Years ago we had a stray kitten we named gypsy it was a very appropriate name one time we move the couch there's a pile of silver and gold jewelry we had "lost" the cat had a stash!?!
dear comment section, it has come to my attention that zefrank1 is a leading member of the buzzfeed team. he has made it a cruel habit to narrate only 1/200th of buzzfeeds videos as well as abandoning his shah nell alltogether. his more recent narration for the cat chow commercials had given me some hope and a good enough reason to cling to life for another week or two, but due to my addiction to clicking, watching, listening, and praying to zefranks shah nell I fear my time is nearing a close. half of love is lo, the way I am feeling right now. I will now do as I do when the vahkoom invades, and make like a sham eel eon
"Dear diary, I have noticed that all my neighboring cat friends and foes share the same voice as me. I shall now continue to yell in front of their homes until my vocal cords give up and my voice shall forever remain different from theirs."
Françoise Paquet "Dear diary, earlier I saw two cats fighting each other to death while another on a balcony was watching eating food as if a king.... I shall go to him and learn his mystic ways.
Nicholas Garcia Dear diary, Authorities and me are worried: my brother has not returned home yet...three days has passed since he went out to meet a misterious cat. My brother told me he'd "learn his mystic ways"...dont know what it means but i'll go out tonight and look for this cat: maybe he'd provide me some answers...
As someone who has owned, bred, showed Persian cats for some 40 years, must say that this is one of the funniest video I have ever seen. Watch it at least once a week, and still cracks me up. Bravo!
"...I can only assume they have forgotten about me and left me here to die. As a last resort, I will stand post for the rest of the night and sing the song of my people...in hopes that they rescue me." 🤣
So stinkin' funny. My cat fits a few of those scenarios. Inside or outside... Removed the "towel" (her blanket) from the foot of the bed...long enough to wash it. OH...AND the food. If there is just one very tiny spot of the bottom of her bowl showing, she thinks she starving. She is EXTREMELY verbal too, down right demanding. None the less I love her so very much. ❤️ loved the video.
C'mon people, Ive been waiting years for more of these! Why haven't they made any more? Both this one and the Sad Dog Diary are right up there with the funniest animal videos of all time. They are brilliant! Please please please make more of them!
Can you elaborate on that? Why would something like this video, which shows no sort of trademark or copyright issues nor does it show any sort of identification of any companies or corporations. Why would this video have any kind of contract attached to it? Or were you just being facetious?
jeremybr2020 Basically he's one of the bosses at buzzfeed.He was hired by them because of his UA-cam popularity and when he joined them he made dear kitten videos for them.But over time he got promoted to a boss and the new contract basically stated if he made new videos for his channel he'd fired cause that would be a conflict of interest as a employee of buzzfeed.As long as he's working for he can't make new videos for his channel as too why he doesn't make any new on buzzfeed that I don't know.
I appreciate the info. Funny thing is, right after I sent you that reply I seen one of the Dear Kitten videos in the suggestion area. Not even knowing that it had anything to do with Zefrank, I clicked on it and was thrilled to discover more Zefrank videos. I watched several of the Dear Kitten videos before making myself stop. I want to pace myself and enjoy them for as long as I can. lol
His voice is the voice cats actually have inside their head. It has to be.
His voice sounds like R.C. Bray. He did an award winning audible for The Martian.
Sounds like my uncle, who is an architect.
...i imagine that is a difficult career for a cat. Not having thumbs has to present some obstacles. I commend your uncle for his dedication.
Tyler Durden LMAO!
all cats have one of 3 voices... zefrank is one, the others are morgan freeman and patrick stewart..
One of my favorite parts is that sad cat refers to "the authorities" whereas sad dog refers to "dearest human".
Why you have 666 like?!
More like, how do you ONLY have 666 likes!?
Aw, spoilers
"The authorities". Yes. That is genius
Somebody said the exact same thing on the dog diaries video a year before you lol
*_I HAVE VOMITED 3 TIMES IN PROTEST_*
9 years on and I keep coming back to this, so awesome
Nostalgia 🥲
Me too….funny cause it’s true
This one is pure gold. It never gets old.
Absolutely this
Me too 😂
As a owner of five cats, this is accurate.
As a former owner of two cats, this is too accurate for comfort.
Plot twist: ZEFRANK IS A CAT! :O
Its humourous how you think you are an “owner” of cats. I have a shaky alliance with “my” cats.
As an owner off 13 cats I aproove
I have one huge husky and 4 kittens and thair mom and I have no idea why people think cats dont love back when I hear that I want to kill person that said that
5 cats? Why?
"I will stand guard and sing the song of my people...""
Is the absolute BEST!!
💗
Meow meow meow meow, meow meow meow meow. Meow meow meow meow, meow meow meow meow.
@@Deadpool-fh6ve Meow Mix you're the one!
Our cats "sing" best when they're on their way to the vet's office. Especially when said office is 30+ miles away... 🥴
Every time something inconvenient happens to me my automatic response is “Like Sisyphus I am bound to Hell”
I would say this hourly at my job as a cashier if I could remember it
Uploading a video when?
Sisyphean is my favorite word
Same 😂
We must imagine Sisyphus happy.
Can't believe this masterpiece is already 10 years old!!!
The classics endure.
I cannot believe i have found this video merely 4 minutes ago! And there's no room for improvement.
“Half of love is just ... lo. And that is how I’m feeling.”
Dangggg nice 👍
I never noticed that, thanks for pointing it out!!
@@trackrunner377 what @CarpriSuns is saying what the cat said.
@@Marcus.Da.Psycho half of love means the lo without the ve,
I've watched this so many times and never noticed that, tyvm
Poetic gold
My bowl is now half way full, soon I will starve to death.
...my attempt's to have it refilled have all failed....
.....I blame the dog.
More like half empty
Maddy Smith that’s such a mood tho😂💕
YOu tOok mY onLy FoOd NOw Im gOnnA StArvE
Repeating what they say in the video and getting lots of likes shows how much the quotes are memorable.
My absolute favorite part of this video is the fact that, it’s counterpart, Sad Dog Diary, refers to the people as “dearest human”, whereas this one refers to them as “the authorities”. It’s perfect. Very accurate.
heyyyy scp lol
SCP Foundation lol
There's about a hundred things you can't do
Shouldn't cats refer to humans as "my servants?"
Yes! PURRRRRFECT
My favorite line is "...sing the song of my people..." - I actually choked on my tea.
Same!!
@@kabaret3Me as well. I use that phrase to describe my cat's lamenting wails of misery, such as being taken to the vet... 😮💨
Yesssss!😁😁😁
I still choke on my tea
"Half of love is just 'lo', which is how I feel right now."
How did I only just now get this?
+Thutil no doubt because you thought it was a spelling error..
Ryan Flood A spelling error in speech, yeah that must have been it.
assuming of course sub titles we on
+Thutil LOL...
+Thutil You and me both, brother!
Dear Diary,
The continuing antics of the authorities continue to vex me. I have made repeated attempts to establish proper sleeping positions on the bed but, in a show of sheer arrogance and spite, they have continually ousted me from my proper place at the center and insisted I rest at the foot of it, after they tuck in. The nerve. Out of desperation I enacted a last-ditch effort to plead my case by sitting on the authorities' faces last night. They threw me out of the room. I am now forced to sleep on the couch like a common beggar. My spirit is breaking.
xD
Beautiful
This needs 500 more likes🤣🤣🤣
Love your comment lol
Bravo👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
"I would like to receive two rubs exactly. A third one and I will bite the shit out of them as protocol."😂
_MiyuMiku_ I laughed wT too hard at that one
So true.
@ point 1:01 exactly!!!
That's because the cat considers you rubbing its tummy as an invitation to play-fight.
Yes, always!
I want "I am convinced they are madmen, devoid of reason" as a ringtone.
I have "Death and Despair" from South Park as my ringtone....
That would be awesome!
That sentence is my favorite part of the whole video.
@@electronicbudder6047 Like Sisyphus, I am bound to hell.
I almost feel bad.
Almost.
Manga Entertainmen
How do you get a verified mark after your name? 🍄💋🍄💋
Manga Entertainment q
Manga Entertainment I
Really.. about what
Dear Diary. I made a great effort today to catch a small mouse. It took an hour. I wanted to show the authorities my trophy and let them see I am willing to carry my own weight around here and provide food.
Alas, they took my hard-won trophy and placed it in the garbage. It’s just like the hairballs I give... they appreciate nothing I do
Id put a crying emoji but im not a 14 yr old girl who uses tik tok
😂😂😂😭😭😭
My spirit is breaking
So apparently dogs write like scientists while cats write like prisoners of war
My god you're write, the cats do sound like PoW
Right*
@@comicsans5812 You sure are Wright, Brother
Comic Sans Kweft*
@Coco that's not how you woosh dumbass
Almost a decade later…and this still makes me laugh til I cry. 🤣❤️
Dear diary: I eat my food so fast that I forget I ate. I must immediately try to eat my brothers food so I don't starve to death.
Ryan B my cat 😏😂
If the cat forgot it ate, it wouldn't be in the diary
Limi V I t s a j o k e b o o m e r
@it's Wally FaZeyourMomHi Yes, it IS a joke... Get it...?
tufff
My mother showed me this year's ago and we could never find it again. Can't wait to show her.
You should see his new one: Cats in Therapy. 🤣
Nice
how did she like it again?! :)
"year's"...what?
"...I will stand outside their door and sing the song of my people....". till Zefrank comes back!!
Liza Tanzawa I'm crying with laughter! 😅😅😅😅
He’s back
Well I would prefer the song of the people to the sound of kitty nails digging at the door to come in...or out ..no in then out lol. It's a good thing I adore the little shit. Cat's sure some people can live without them..( not me..cat addict for life) but it would be boring and colorless.
Liza Tanzawa made me actually laugh out loud
I literally cried... It's 1am.... Why am I here?
Over the years, I just keep coming back. It's bookmarked and it NEVER GETS OLD for a cat-owned human.
Yeah, me too... I still send it to people as well.
"There is no logic in this place" same, sad cat, same
No logic... he must be at a liberal arts college
@@jsav4269 Right, go to a religious college instead, theyll tell you how to think and feel so you dont have to do it yourself.
@@MLBlue30 true, but a liberal arts college will demand you conform into a single hive mind, otherwise you’ll be deemed a racist
@@jsav4269 maybe they deem people as racist because they're legitimately calling out racist behavior.
@@antipsychotic451 give me an example? Like how they want segregation for black students at colleges? Ooooh wait that’s right white liberals that want that, how bout the fact that voter is laws are racist? Because according to White liberals when interviewed they say Black people don’t have the mental fortitude to know where a dmv is or have access to phones or the internet? Or how bought a study done, where they discovered that white liberals dumb down their speech when talking to minorities, gues who it the same study they found didn’t dumb down their speech 100% of the time...... that’s right, conservatives, 😲 wow... conservatives view minorities as their equal!!! Liberals not so much! Oooh ooh how bout this one , Richard Spencer the most well known white supremacist in the USA voted for joe Biden and the democrats, because he said trump was doing to much for the black community, and he also likes that white liberals want to bring back segregation, he’s 109% on board with the democrats plan!!!! So I’d like some examples from you now, I’ll wait
Dear diary,
The red dot has appeared again. It moves faster than I can imagine and seems to move unheeded across all surfaces.
Despite the last 54 attempts, I will once again ruthlessly chase after it.
It does not seem to be able to be caught, and disappears at will.
Wish me luck.
Why the fuck does this comment has 400 likes just for repeating something from the video
Because it's not actually repeating something said in the video lol
StrayJello 😂🤣😭🤣😭😭😭🤣🤣🤣😂🤣🤣😂😂😂
Luck is wished
This is not in the video lol
Dear diary,
It is 5 am on the day my human calls saturday but I feel since Ive have had plenty of sleep, so has he.
I will use all of my efforts, vocal and physical to wake this slothful beast and get him up.
I'm aware I dont need anything, I just want him up.
After he rises, I will take that as an 'all is well' and I will immediately go back to sleep.
Oh god.. yes, this is so accurate.
+Tyler Durden No thank you.
ahhhhhaaaa. so true
My cat wrote that
B H Mch omg 666 likes i dont want to ruin it by liking...sry
The garden door part with the "to go outside, inside, outside or inside" is PERFECT! 😂🤣
My cat wakes me up every morning at 5am to be let out, and this is what she does! 🤣🤣🤣
Dear Diary, I have been standing outside the authorities bedroom door for nearly 3 hours now, pawing ever so greatly and meowing quite loudly. The only result thus far is several loud screams, though I can not understand this primitive language, I can only assume it is cheering me on. I will continue to paw at the door.
Well-written!
Thanks man.
lol so true.
SO MUCH YES! Nothing sexier than having a foil ball fly under the door and then constant meowing for someone to hit it back. Then when you open the door, the two cats want to come in and investigate what could have POSSIBLY been going on.
Rene Thurston And that's the REAL reason cat ladies don't have children.
Dear Diary,
Still no zefrank1 videos for nearly a year, or over. I've lost count. I will wait, but my patience is growing thin. I am breaking.
+Althea McMinn I have had to console myself with his Dear Kitten Purina ads.
Dear diary. My dear friend has died I am sure he will never come back I cry everyday
+Althea McMinn I just subscribed to him, then I saw this and unsubscribed.
Psyclone The Seahawk Don't lose hope! He may return one day.
the authorities have went on hiatus, we shall just sit here waiting, singing the song of our people..
Dogs have owners. Cats have staff.
Authorities
+I'm possessed by a ditto lmfo
Is a RUSSIAN cat!
tamsinthai ??
love pony
spammer
Dear Diary,
For the past two months I have refused to eat nothing but turkey and giblets wet food, to the point where the authorities have stockpiled an enormous amount of it in the locked food room. Now, as per etiquette, I have decided I will not to eat the turkey and insist that I will eat only beef. Yet the authorities continue to supply me with the vile turkey mess. Apparently my culture means nothing to them, and so I'm afraid I shall never eat again.
Truth!
Dear Diary,
Zefrank still hasn't returned to UA-cam... It has been a lonely, depressing endeavor without him and yet his old videos has kept me going through these dark times. I will still hold out hope that he may return one day but that hope is slowly dwindling.
Grinning Videos
Dear diary,
I read a comment about zefrank on his cat diary video. While the video brought me great joy, the lack of new zefrank content portends to his continued absence. Seeing the collective yearning for his presence among the community gives me hope, but also begs the question, how long can hope last?
Uun, this is too much. I shall pee on my bed for comfort.
Grinning Videos hey just letting you know he uploaded a new video on the frog fish! He's back!
I will pee on the bed for comfort.
Dear Diary,
As of April 24, 2018, Zefrank has been uploading regularly, as it should be.
In solidarity with my comrades, I, too, have peed on the bed.....
....and I blamed it on the dog.
This person truly knows the mind of a cat.
I will stand guard as the human sleeps.
There was a movement under the blanket
I pounce
My human yowls in pain.
The creature has already harmed my human!
The creature moves again and I pounce.
It's yells again.
I think I'll do this for the rest of the night to comfort my human.
Underrated
So self-sacrificing!
Can we get some "Quarantined Cat Diaries"?!?!? I could really use a laugh at this point.
Here I can make you laugh with this joke ... your life
@Mackensey Napoli check out Pets in Isolation. Same guy made it. Hilarious as f***.
@@chasedriskell8466 its so hilarious my sides are bursting hahahahahaha look at me laugh hahahahahahah, go home chase. You're not funny.
Do you know of Pluto Living?
He would not make one it’s been 7 years
"Like Sisyphus, I am bound to hell."
😂
Nice
We must imagine Sisyphus happy...
TheArtist,
Pushing that same rock uphill for eternity? The cat is being a drama queen, per its catness.
@@beachgirl4583 It's a tongue in cheek reference to Albert Camus, a French existentialist... Just tryin to get the word out there
Dear Diary,
For weeks there have been whispers of a “diet,” and today it finally happened. I was given half-rations and I no longer have the energy to move more than 2 feet from my bowl. The road to perdition is much shorter than I thought.
...This wasn't enough I might die soon, so I have to go to this so call "Trashcan" because the authorities often threw food in there.
@gandalfsbigbeard3172 - I laughed aloud! ^_^
Dear Diary, It has come to my attention that my human dies every day when the giant light bulb in the sky stop working. My ancestors told me of an ancient ritual to bring them back from the dead and so, I must paw him in the face every time the light bulb starts working again. My human do not seem aware of the phenomenon, as he throw me off the bed in anger everytime. There is no logic to such behaviour, but I must continue, or else I would starve to death.
Well-written!
Andrian Harsono Oh my! Thanks. I never thought this would get so many likes.
220 likes? I'm like a superstar now by UA-cam standards :O
LPP♥
This was one of my stepmother’s favorite videos, she would always play this on the way to school, she passed away on Tuesday at the age of 36. R.I.P
36? So young..
My condolences
🙏🏻
R.I.P🌹
❤️
No matter how many times I watch this it is still funny.
You think this is funny? YOU MONSTER!
Yes. And no matter over how many years
@@SimoneEvans Probably why it has over 30 million views.
Same here 🐈🐈⬛
It always brings a smile to my face as well.
Dear Diary. The authorities should feel better if I give them a message under their chin while they sleep. But instead of showing gratitude I was pushed off the bed and onto the floor. How inconsiderate. I will puke in his shoe.
Dear Diary,
I have tried to communicate with The Authorities, but every time I said something, they responded in a high pitched voice, as if mocking my native tongue. As a result, I am elaborating on a plan to scratch out their eyelids, so they will never feel the comfort of sleep. Nothing has worked so far, but I will not give up. Wish me luck.
My kitten stared at my dilating pupil and attacked my eyelid the other morning
😂
“Like Sisyphus, I am bound to hell,” I SCREAMED 😂😂😂
I did too, fkn tears flew!
@No Record the Greeks punished Sisyphus by having him push a Boulder up a hill only to roll back down. Don’t assume people are dumb.
@No Record actually, if someone quote that line is because they know about it... Quite simple.
That's one of the best cat vids I've ever seen. It's just perfect. The language, syntax, everything. Sounds just like a cat would to me. Awesome job! This deserves a million likes!!
And the facial Expressions match perfectly...this was just brilliant
There is no logic in this place
True life, lol
I happened to scroll to this comment as it came up on the video!
the jyms mood
“Sing the song of my people”
"Dear diary - I attempted to smother one of my captors by draping my body around his neck while he was sleeping, but he just praised me for being "cuddly". I will try again when he falls asleep after a heavy meal."
Having had two cats for 17 years, I can totally relate to this poor kitty's dilemma. Its even more hilarious with two working in tandem. They provided so much love and hilarity to my life that when they passed, I was really sad. I miss them still, but now have a cute little 15 lb dog who is fast filling that void. Its awesome how pets can provide so much comfort, love and affection in one's life.
"Like Sisyphus, I am bound to hell!" LOL.
@Bobqwt Bruuuuh I almost completely forgot about this story.
Dear diary, I have decided to place a request for Them to make sequels to the sad pet diary videos. It has been over 7 years and I do believe it's past the time to continue this obviously unfinished saga... Now I can only hope that my plead does not fall on deaf ears or hateful souls... Here goes nothing... may fate smile upon us...
I have to watch this video a couple times a year. It still cracks me up.
"I will stand post and sing the song of my people". LOL
Ryan 317 love it!
"Exactly 2 belly rubs. 3 and I will bite the shit out of their hand, as per protocol."
Dear diary
The authorities have summoned some sort of tornado machine. I do not like it. It scares me. It makes such a terrible noise as it proceeds to destroy the multiple furry presents I left around the house for the authorities.oh how it mocks me.
that would be vacoooom, see his new video dear kitten hosted by buzz feed video
thank you i shall try to make sure the authorities know of my hatred to this vacoooom.
you need to use the curtains of invisibility.
ah, i have heard a legend of these but have never been able to reach such a height that is the window
i cant believe this has reached 121 likes
I found this like 7 or 8 yrs ago. I still come back to watch it too many times in of row.. This video will live rent free in my head till I die. 😂😂😂
“Half of love is just lo, and that’s just how I feel” OH GOLLY, I FELT THAT.
The one at 2:40 is just so cute and sad, it's sad-orable.
"I would like to receive two rubs exactly. A third one and I will bite the shit out of them as per protocol" Lol'd so hard 😂 😂 😂 😂
Elias Guerra That one made me burst out with laughter. 😂😂
And it's so true! (or at least, most of the time), lol.
This is true, my friends cat did this every time. 😂
"This is the 900th day my nose has been unintentionally wetted"
This is the kind of comedy I want.
Agreed
“This might be my last entry” 💀
Lenaysha Starr first reply I guess
The authorities have removed the pair of black pants in the couch, there is no place for me to sleep.
Fall 2019: *May we suggest, to you, this video*
Me: Joke is in you, algorithm. This one has been saved in my favorites, since 2013.
Clearly, the algorithm serves the authorities. There is no logic.
This is golden
I know that this is several years old. I know that it has 5 billion comments, however, I just wanted to say when I need a good chuckle I still come here and watch and listen to this again, and again and again!! Thank you!!
😺
I'm responsible for half the views here. Because I never stopped laughing at this
This never gets old. Brilliant. As only cat owners can relate to. The narration is genius.
Dear Diary: The Old Lady that loves me and calls me "Tweetums," (ugh) does not like for me to give her massages, but I cannot stop, since it is my way of showing my appreciation for the things she does for me. She complains that the needles in my paws hurt, but she has got to accept that sometimes LOVE hurts.
"The authorities have closed the door... I can only assume that they have forgotten about me and left me here to die..."
So dramatic... and so accurate. 🤣
These are all injustices that NEED to be addressed!
Thank you zefrank for sharing these atrocities against the felines to the public
In the middle of the night my cat sat outside of my bedroom door and meowed loudly over and over again until I got up and pet her. Then she was quiet.
My cat too
Same.
OMG IKR
sometimes I wonder if they're doing what I do when im up all night wanting to cuddle with someone down the hall. you think about it and think about it until eventually you're like, fuck it! im going to ask.
walk to their door, *tap tap tap* (in a pitiful voice)"you wanna cuddle tonight?"
they're like "im trying to sleep damnit"
"ok............. :("
Dear diary,
RuthAnn is legal now. I am devising my means on how to profess my love on the internet without sounding like a beta doofus which I have failed at miserably. I shall now resign myself to being her cat and standing outside her bedroom door and making my war chant so she hears my intentions. It has come to my attention that she believed this message was from a handsome male on the internet but she has no notion that I used my mental powers to take over his mind to write it out... since I can't talk... and since she still thinks I am a female. She has no understanding of cat gender and while this angers me it does not change my love. I love me... I am me.... and now I am... oh fuck it... where is my litter box...
This is the best video ever for cat owners. "...sing the song of my people" and "the black pants have been moved/ keyboard" are my fave parts.
Dear diary,
I have caught myself a delicious morsel who was scurrying about so late in the hour. To my dismay, one of the authorities came down and saw the squirming treat in my mouth and proceeded to scream... quite loudly.... in fact, so loudly that I tried to calm her down with the song of my people, but had forgotten about the creature in my mouth. I will have to start the hunt anew again tomorrow night...
And this actually happened with me and my cat one day lol
DetectiveTective What's worse then that is when my cat captures a bird and proceeds to bring it inside with the hopes of pleasing me. However the birds are not yet dead and start to fly around the house, screaming in pain and fear...
My god that sounds awful O.O
Jesus it was quite bad xD it took so long to catch it and im not sure if this was the right thing to do but i put it down. It had gone through all this pain im not sure if it would faction any more ;(.
Dylan Dickson We had to flee bomb the apartment for that reason.
These are better than the ASPCA commercials at making me want to adopt a cat.
😂 Damn you're right, now that I think of it.
Everyone needs at least two.
2019 and this is still one of my absolute favorite videos.
2023. Still my favorite
half of love is just low, which is how i feel. My spirit is breaking.
+dsalmeron lo...half of love.
+dsalmeron Its not low .. Love - ve = lo xD Lo + ve = Love
"Poop in solidarity" is hilarious
The one and only time I closed the bedroom door my newly adopted tortoiseshell decided to climb up onto the stove somehow turn the knobs and tried to burn the building down!
I love her dearly she's my little skinny mini Butterbean but I continue to live in fear... 😰
My cat did something similar but not bc I closed him out of the bedroom. The two cats I have like to jump on the stove but one day one of them jumped up there and hit the knob and managed to push it in and turn it and catch the pot holder on fire. Luckily I was right there and put it out. I now have child locks on our stove knobs. 🤨 we usually don’t lay pot holders or anything else flammable around our stove but sometimes it happens
@@user-mw6jo7ql1c The little Firebug assassins don't get what they want they'll kill us all! 😆
Arcadia Occult Curio Shop Autumn Storm Hp stealthy assassins 🤣
@@user-mw6jo7ql1c You know! I told my family if they find me chopped up in the freezer don't believe the su*cide note it was Rose!
She's reminds me of a capuchin monkey she's always got a scheme cooking in her head.
Years ago we had a stray kitten we named gypsy it was a very appropriate name one time we move the couch there's a pile of silver and gold jewelry we had "lost" the cat had a stash!?!
Arcadia Occult Curio Shop Autumn Storm Hp hahaha! Mine like to stare me down too as if they are in the act of plotting 😂
Tried showing this to my girlfriend but forgot she was a crazy cat lady... she just made sympathetic noises all the way through.
And why is that a bad thing? Have you no heart?
Cubeloon No because he has a heart of stone, along with me and I laughed through the whole of this video :D
Cubeloon I do have a heart yes, yet it only pumps shit through my veins bro GET ON MY LEVEL you have love in your heart and shit FUCK DAT
....I'm a cat nut, but I laughed all the way through.
She must be on a-whole-nother level. xD
So sad I cri.
So sad i cried at your grammer
Moonfur555 What, you think my 'grammar' was actually legit in that comment? pffffft
Lets just call it even and forget this even happend
agreed.
Moonfur555
*grammar
Dear diary day 945 and zefrank hasn't returned, suicide is inevitable.
he voiced Dear Kitten by buzzfeed... I dont think he is coming back, after going to buzzfeed
+TotallyGlar he has gone to the dark side.
dear comment section,
it has come to my attention that zefrank1 is a leading member of the buzzfeed team. he has made it a cruel habit to narrate only 1/200th of buzzfeeds videos as well as abandoning his shah nell alltogether.
his more recent narration for the cat chow commercials had given me some hope and a good enough reason to cling to life for another week or two, but due to my addiction to clicking, watching, listening, and praying to zefranks shah nell I fear my time is nearing a close.
half of love is lo, the way I am feeling right now.
I will now do as I do when the vahkoom invades, and make like a sham eel eon
Seth Eaglehouse :(
'Dear Kitten' is advertising for Friskies.
I can’t believe this video is almost 10 years old, it’s so nostalgic :)
Please come back zefrank. You easily had one of the best channels on UA-cam, you are terribly missed by me and thousands of other subscribers.
Erm... More like a million but whatever
Ville Tågefelt BuzzFeed got him. It's too late now.
Ville Tågefelt he just uploaded a video on the frog fish! He has returned!
"Dear diary, I have noticed that all my neighboring cat friends and foes share the same voice as me. I shall now continue to yell in front of their homes until my vocal cords give up and my voice shall forever remain different from theirs."
"dear diary, today i saw a retarded cat meowing out side my door. i must gut him and eat him wish me luck"
Françoise Paquet I can't breathe....
"dear diary yesterday i found the cat that meowing and ate his organs while another cat watched ...
he will be my next victim wish me luck"
Françoise Paquet "Dear diary, earlier I saw two cats fighting each other to death while another on a balcony was watching eating food as if a king.... I shall go to him and learn his mystic ways.
Nicholas Garcia
Dear diary, Authorities and me are worried: my brother has not returned home yet...three days has passed since he went out to meet a misterious cat. My brother told me he'd "learn his mystic ways"...dont know what it means but i'll go out tonight and look for this cat: maybe he'd provide me some answers...
I watch this in memory of grumpy cat.
As many times as I've seen this, I still find it laugh-out-loud hilarious. You did such a great job on this - especially the voice!
As someone who has owned, bred, showed Persian cats for some 40 years, must say that this is one of the funniest video I have ever seen. Watch it at least once a week, and still cracks me up. Bravo!
"...I can only assume they have forgotten about me and left me here to die. As a last resort, I will stand post for the rest of the night and sing the song of my people...in hopes that they rescue me." 🤣
I died @ that part
Sing the song of my people is my favorite!
So stinkin' funny. My cat fits a few of those scenarios. Inside or outside... Removed the "towel" (her blanket) from the foot of the bed...long enough to wash it. OH...AND the food. If there is just one very tiny spot of the bottom of her bowl showing, she thinks she starving. She is EXTREMELY verbal too, down right demanding. None the less I love her so very much. ❤️ loved the video.
I have to come back through the years and rewatch this video. It still brings absolute hilarious laughter to this day. A true work of genius!
C'mon people, Ive been waiting years for more of these! Why haven't they made any more? Both this one and the Sad Dog Diary are right up there with the funniest animal videos of all time. They are brilliant! Please please please make more of them!
He's contractualy obligated to not make them
Can you elaborate on that? Why would something like this video, which shows no sort of trademark or copyright issues nor does it show any sort of identification of any companies or corporations. Why would this video have any kind of contract attached to it? Or were you just being facetious?
jeremybr2020 Basically he's one of the bosses at buzzfeed.He was hired by them because of his UA-cam popularity and when he joined them he made dear kitten videos for them.But over time he got promoted to a boss and the new contract basically stated if he made new videos for his channel he'd fired cause that would be a conflict of interest as a employee of buzzfeed.As long as he's working for he can't make new videos for his channel as too why he doesn't make any new on buzzfeed that I don't know.
I appreciate the info. Funny thing is, right after I sent you that reply I seen one of the Dear Kitten videos in the suggestion area. Not even knowing that it had anything to do with Zefrank, I clicked on it and was thrilled to discover more Zefrank videos. I watched several of the Dear Kitten videos before making myself stop. I want to pace myself and enjoy them for as long as I can. lol
jeremybr2020 Lol
Love the part where he is saying “the squirrel is back again, it mocks me”. 😂
Half of love is just low... which is how I feel. My spirit is breaking...
Every couple of years I have to come back and rewatch this. It is an Internet classic
My teacher sent this to me bc I'm feeling extremely low. This is just awesome.
His voice is so AMAZING!
This is just TOO CUTE...PRECIOUS!
Eight years later, thins still makes me laugh until I cry!
This never gets old.
NEVER!
@@territarheel5163 LOL, I actually recently rewatched it, lol. Good timing.
Even over a decade later, this is still absolute comedic genius.
Oh, the tribulations, the indignities, the utter injustice of it all! And to add insult to injury, I'm burdened with nine such lives...
Lol should be a classic lol ty
"Sing the song of my people" took me out LOL
And the part about waiting for the laptop to be in use to sit on the keyboard loll
I have a petite cat named "Panda" who thinks she is an excellent typist. (She is not.)