its so tiring when you realize that it happenedd again and there is a new person that has become your fp and you know its gonna be so much pain from there on
It's been really hard for me because while certain breakups devastated me, and I realize now it was because of my BPD and they were my favorite person at the time, I didn't know I had BPD until about 2 weeks ago when I was trying to figure out why I was obsessed with my male best friend and how to get over him and I found stuff about BPD and favorite person and it checked every single box. I am so glad for more answers as to why I am the way I am but it's so hard to change those thought patterns when they've been that way for almost 35 years in my case. Kinda sucks my husband never gave me a chance for him to become my favorite person, he moved in after 2 weeks of knowing each other lol almost 10 years later and through a whole bunch of shit that should have broke us, I know that I am grateful for him that he puts up with all my shit. No one else would, my family is even sick of me sometimes lol
@@CORKY247kinda sucks that your husband never gave you a chance to become his fp? Im sorry that’s such an odd confusing sentence to say, can you explain what you mean?
I have a very hard time defferentiating between if I love that person, or just have a very strong bond with them. Whenever somebody is nice to me and pays attention to me, I get a crush, I think. It makes it very hard if you are in a committed relationship, because I know that I don't want to be in a relationship with them, but I don't want them to be in a relationship with someone else. I feel like I would lose that bond with them and it makes me so scared.
This happens to me as well. I have had this happen since I was very young. Any guy that would pay attention to me would automatically become my crush. I’m married now and it still happens every now and again. It’s incredibly frustrating. I would love to just be friends with people.
I think it can feel much worse when your favorite person is also unhealthy on an emotional level, such as someone who is abusive and/or has NPD. I used to be really drawn to that type of person but going to therapy has helped me recognize what healthy relationships look like.
Or if they also have BPD. Heightens issues. The challenge is as in NPD, that is usually so familiar to BPD peeps. For another BPD person as a fav person, the bond can be so powerful; I mean someone who gets this "too-muchness" and doesn't judge you for it? Love can seem deep and rare, but then the bad stuff, theirs and yours. Severe and hard to ride two different people's waves.
My partner of 10 years doesn't believe in BPD, and with my self loathing, I can rarely tell if I'm being abused or if his behavior is the natural answer to my formerly wild life.
I’ve found it useful to read a note I made for me to read before contacting my FP. I hope this is helpful for someone out there. Please read below: Maddie Reasons to not contact Maddie ~ Don’t contact her when I’m feeling needy or abandoned. Period. If I’m feeling anxious don’t message or see her. Before contacting Maddie remember: The friendship with Maddie is stable, secure, and at the exact right level of closeness. She sincerely cares and enjoys my company and communication. She is being extremely gracious given my age and the oddity of this situation of her being my favorite person. I’m sure she’s aware that my affinity for her is beyond normal therefore it’s absolutely necessary for me to respect her and protect her happiness by maintaining good boundaries. Remember that while she does care she doesn’t need to be burdened. She has zero responsibility for my happiness and she has zero tolerance for unnecessary bullshit. Being a burden or unnecessarily interrupting her day will only cause her to rightfully cut off all communication. Reasons to contact Maddie ~ When communicating is useful not just for me but also for her.
@@anotherranger2924 Yes it does, which can happen if you aren't careful. A close former friend has unchecked BPD and I didn't realize until far too late that I was her favorite person. Iived with her and her husband for a while. Our relationship got weirdly sexual (she had a crush on me, I didn't reciprocate those feelings and had made that clear for years). From there it went to financially sabotaging herself and everyone else in the apartment, I assume because she was afraid any of us moving would risk me abandoning her completely. When my SO moved in and started working online, former friend started stealing the money we'd give them to pay the WiFi, claim it was paid, and try to blame my SO when the internet would get throttled. Attempting to talk to her or encourage her to get help regardless of the atmosphere or her mood would be met with brush-offs or explosions. She left me no choice but to cut contact because I could no longer trust her. I had told her a few months prior to my move out date what month I was planning to leave, but by the time I found a place, I knew she would sabotage me if I told her. She spread a smear campaign after that, telling people I just up and left with no notice. I refuse to speak to her or have anything to do with her unless she gets help, and I make sure she has no way of knowing where I live. She recently popped up in one of my recently abandoned social media inboxes throwing petty insults and it's been over a year since we've had any contact.
I hate being like this. It’s so exhausting. I start to feel better then I find a favorite person and my whole world is turned upside down again. I feel like I’ve worked so hard on myself but then it all goes out the window
i feel you😭😭 but it’s not a linear journey! We’re still picking up new little things every day! You know more about it today than you did a year ago❤much love
I tried going to a psychiatrist he basically told me to exercise and pray, he made it seem as if im making up all of this, and here you are Dr.Fox helping me understand myself every single time you post a video. Thank you!!
exactly. i had a same experience with you. my psychiatrist ignored the main issue which is BPD. and made general advice like, praying, exercise, go out more etc........ it's impossible to find a psychiatrist who wants to talk and can handle BPD.
While i acknowledge what he says is helpful to maintain a healthy mental state it doesnt fix what we are going through, the emotional instability , the rage, the self destructive behaviour , the mood swings and the worst is the suicidal thoughts i cant get rid off. I'm just letting you know you are not alone in this. I changed my psychiatrist first appointment is next week. Dont give up!
@@delll372 Its not impossible! If you can, search on-line in your area for a psychiatrist OR psychologist who has personality disorders as a part of their scope of practice. If there isn't anything specific on-line then asking people at a health clinic for a referral. Just like going to a general practioner doctor and expecting expert advice on cancer treatment isn't going to be as helpful as going to a Dr. who specializes in Cancer treatment. The general practitioner Dr. may be aware of it but not aware of very specific issue and patterns related to that disease. Dr. Fox is an example of someone who is familiar with Personality disorders. Dr. Todd Grande( on youtube) is also familiar. Good luck in finding help for your long-term health!
those recommendations are not themselves invalid, however, they can be a useful part of managing depression, anxiety, and other intense emotions. It may be the psychiatrist did not give you a context for this. However, psychiatrists mainly do medication management nowadays. Wouldn't it make sense to see a therapist weekly?
@@watcherwlc53 my Therapist doesn't diagnose or provide context either, which is something I have a lot of trouble understanding. In my Profession, I have to cite and have a reference list for any recommendations I give (I'm a licensed Dietitian), whereas I feel not part of the treatment and have to trust this guy who won't even let me know anything about himself--like the wizard of Oz behind the curtain.
Friends with BPD: no one can give you the love and security that only you can give yourselves. The rest of the people just can give you support but also they have their own life and problems.
@@TerryGuzmanMartinez I hear you Teresa. Sometimes when a loved with with BPD says they can’t do anything about their BPD I want to say “Yeah, neither can I.”
@@willtroy1986 I'm sorry, really. I'd like to help the one I love but I can't. But I know that the first step is the one with BPD to recognize he/she has a problem and then to ask for help and most important to do the work, otherwise it's practically impossible to help (sorry for my English).
You very well could have CPTSD, or comorbidity with PTSD. Have you been professionally diagnosed and met the 5 out of 8 traits Borderline criteria in the DSM?
Hope you are doing well and healing. Don't fault yourself for having BPD, it is not your fault in anyway. Hope you are staying away from all of the misinformation and misunderstanding of your diagnosis because people with BPD are just as beautiful and loveable as any other person. Best wishes to you ❤
i have the over excess of empathy and i cant look at someone without wanting to burst into tears because i feel like they are feeling so much pain so please do dr. fox
i literally just told my favourite person last night that it feels like i can’t exist without them and how stupid and confronting that seems but this video really helped me feel validated, like there is some kind of reason as to why i’m like this - that i’m not just crazy. thank you
that being said they also told me that they don’t want to talk to me much for the next month because they need to focus on their studies and i’m basically taking up all their time. i don’t really know how to help myself though i wish it more than anything. i don’t want to hurt the people i love...
Your videos about favorite person relationships have made it so much easier to accept and work through this tendency within myself. I used to be extremely ashamed of my attachment. I hope you keep posting more on this topic! Thank you so much!
I don’t have bpd but this is how I’m with my best friend... I can’t function without her and it has a massive impact on my life, whenever I try and explain how much my obsession with her dictates my life people don’t get it and I can’t get the help I need. I feel like I’m driving her away and I can’t cope
You might be the first psychologist who actually uses the term Favorite Person and I honestly love you for it because you're being relatable and connected to BPD sufferers.
As someone diagnosed with severe bpd seeing these videos reaffirm the things I’ve learned about myself and through countless therapists. I’m very self aware of what I do and why all of my relationships have led me to be abandoned and avoided. I’ve not been very good with my therapy and most of my therapists don’t specialize in my disorder and it’s led to many failed attempts at recovery and learning better habits. I latch of anxiously to people mostly people I really really like and I’m glued to them constantly texting constantly needing reassurance and an hour without hearing from them is like centuries and I’m crippled like I can’t work or eat or sleep unless I know everything is ok. The fear that they left me for someone else is overwhelming or that they left me forever for some reason is crippling and I’ve often wanted to send angry messages but then when they message me or call it’s like some took their foot off of the water hose and I can breathe and function and I’m overly apologetic. This common for me among other habits and triggers that me to feeling overwhelmingly angry and bitter towards myself believing I’m forever an unlovable unhealthy person who is a mistake. I do whatever I can to be liked and love by others and I want others to need me. I’ve made threats against myself and done stupid things to avoid abandonment. I’m just not healthy. There’s just this void that no matter what I do no love is ever enough love and my sadness is anguish my anger is rage and when someone does something they should never do to me or someone else they are evil but I put my favorite people on a high pedestal until they let me down.
I have found myself lashing out at my FP whim I’ve been married to for 20 years. He is a covert narcissist. I knew something never connected all these years up until almost 4 years ago when he discarded me in a very brutal and out of the blue scenario. I was so devastated that I had to be taken to the hospital y ambulance. I literally cried for almost 8 hours straight in the hospital. Nothing they were giving me would calm me down. My blood pressure was through the roof and I had the worst headache all those hours that I have ever had. They eventually sent a case worker in my room to talk to me. As I began telling her what was wrong, she told me I was in a codependent relationship. I didn’t know what that was so I had to research it to get better clarity. I list some strength on the right side of my body and they wanted to transfer me to another hospital to have a MRI done. They believed I had what’s called a TIA, which is a small stroke that comes and goes so fast, only a MRI could see it. I refused and wanted to leave. I had to get my mom to come sign me out because they didn’t fell comfortable just discharging me. So I was signed out into my moms care. I was 45 at the time. He ended up coming back 3 weeks later. It has been steadily going downhill ever since. Now I respond with anger and rage when he ignores me. I left him 1 month ago, and he is angry that I left like I did. I notice that I wanted him to feel what I felt
Dr. Fox, I'm 51 would you consider doing a video on BPD and how the traits manifests in this age group. I've heard there is a big difference. Thank you.
Dr Fox, are you able to do a video on maintaining healthy boundaries for what would be judged objectively as toxic interpersonal relationships? I’m struggling with this one. Thank you for all the work you do.
Dr. Daniel, you have helped me insurmountable ways, and watching your videos as they progress helps bring me back to reality time and time again- Thank you so much. I recently ended things with my FP- I'm proud of myself because it was toxic, but this video makes me re-realise how tragic the situation was and how glad I am to be out of that bad situation, and that regardless of the situation- I shouldn't need anyone- relationship or friends or family; to feel like me. Only me can figure out how to feel comfortable in myself. This video will serve me well when I am in a rut and feel that need to go back to "comfort" in others again. Thank you again, I am a huge fan, please keep making awesome videos
Let’s share what our beliefs and values are from the video. I’ll go first! Fave color: mint blue (not green!) Fave food: pork belly What helps me relax: meditation while stretching What helps me feel good: wearing a new outfit that I picked out alone and just washed. What makes me proud: cooking or baking something new that tastes great, and eating the leftovers. Who wants to go next?
favorite color: Black Favorite food:🍕 What helps me relax: Gabapentin, youtube, my cats What helps me feel good: Kissing my cats, eating tasty foods and napping What makes me proud: I’m still a loving and giving person despite attracting narcs. 😊 Someone else’s turn now 😀
I feel like I did this with my best friends in the past. I still kind of do it and it is soooo scary to see that most of my behaviors and things that I did/do can be all explained bc of bpd
One of the hardest parts about this whole “favorite person” issue is that abandonment/rejection issues cause it all. Which means they likely also cause other issues. Like feeling connected with people who aren’t great for us. Bc our central nervous systems are seeking familiarity. Which means the “fav person” is often NOT dependable, not secure, not the things we’re trying to get from them. Also…we should talk a lot more about how the fact that we have “fav people” means we have so much more healing to do and we should be focusing on that.
I'd love to see a video on OCD and BPD. These go hand in hang with me, I don't organize or clean or anything but I think myself into routines and thought patterns that cause BPD episodes. There's not enough good videos on internal OCD and especially the relationship with BPD
TpSpider yes! same with me I have had issues where I’m so obsessed with my personality being perfect I don’t know if this is because of my ocd and bpd mixed together or something my doctor hasn’t been able to help me with that.
This favorite person notion has had me also nodding my head in recognition of past behaviors with different friends over the years- a new concept to my mind!! (I am also tripping on the agoraphobia thing, still, today).
Hi, future licensed clinical psychologist here. You are _so_ much less condescending than the famous Dr. Peterson. You talk more about what the symptoms and characteristics for what they are rather than painting a "lower" image for someone who is borderline. Thank you for the better warmth. :) update: nvm this video hit too close to home oop I'm in tears
I think it is valuable to add that my favourite person was actually a pet and that can happen as well, making it even easier to maintain a codependent relationship. Now my pet has passed away, and I'm having extreme difficulty in living and being happy as well because with bpd he always gave me the sense of need and self that I needed, and it functioned as much more than just a pet to me - making me in fact function properly. He never flawed in emotionally supplying me (as a person eventually would), but now death has taken him away and I'm completely empty and broken. As a child. (very neglected and socially isolated), I'd hold a teddy bear 24hrs as an impersonated imaginary friend that would never leave me. My point is that favourite persons don't necessarily need to be human, but entities. I guess.
I feel like this about my cat who just passed away… was the only stable relationship since I got him when I was 18… and I’m illogically mad at him for dying of cancer because now I’m all alone 😢
My favorite person is in Tennessee right now. He lives in Miami and I feel abandoned. I haven’t talked to him in two days but he did text me. I’ve been avoiding talking to him and calling him but I find myself constantly thinking about him and fantasizing about him. I know we aren’t in a relationship but I can’t stop telling myself this. He’s so much apart of my day that I try not to be busy but when I can’t get ahold of him, I feel like he’s replacing me. I so needed to hear this class Dr Fox. I’ve been so dependent on someone that I really don’t know how to deal with myself and my own emotions. Thank you for this and this is only the beginning.
This was very helpful. My favorite person is my therapist and it gets so overwhelming at times because I know I depend on her and expect things of her that I know she can’t give me. Like I wish she could care for me like a friend but I know there are boundaries and she has to keep in professional. I haven’t told her she is my FP , I’m too afraid to but feel I need to.
As someone w BPD, I had to seek out your video on it because I’m trying very hard to keep my FP the guy I’m dating at a healthy distance. I’ve been really struggling with identity lately since I’ve had a lot of situational/life upheaval/change in the past year. My last FP and I were both very toxic for each other, and I do not want a repeat of this with my current partner 🖤
I've been in recovery for 17+ years and I've told many other borderlines this exact thing when it comes to FP relationships but it took me to be really hurt by someone who was an FP. After she left I realized she didn't do much for our friendship, I was very much being used for my kindness, i was honest etc but wasn't same other way around. She broke my boundaries, talked about me behind my back and publicly shamed with her friends. So since then I've not allowed anyone to be that close to me again. I refused to be vulnerable with anyone because it was shared with everyone. I dissociated for almost 2 years and attempted suicide not because of this single person but many events that happened all at once from my parents abandoning me, other friends, losing a long term relationship that I ended due to emotional abuse. I retook many programs dbt, cbt, emotional regulation, interpersonal relationships etc so that I could get back to my high functioning self. I'm still on my journey but I don't depend on anyone anymore. I just depend on myself.
I'm kind of lost with my life related to this. My favorite person is kind of toxic and has hurt me a lot, but I've cared about them and have needed them for a lot of my life, since we were teenagers (we're the same age). Recently they've become verbally abusive and generally have developed some toxic behavior, and it makes me feel awful about myself and I wonder if they even like me anymore, but I need them in my life so badly, I love them so much, and they're the only person in my life I've been that open and free with about everything. I was able to be myself around them without worrying or censoring any part of myself, but they got really close to me and we became intimate, but they always talked about me like I was too crazy to be considered seriously, or they would talk about dating other people in front of me, and even say things to me or make jokes about certain traumas I've been through that really, really hurt me, but I love them so much I can't detach. I've tried recently, even stopped messaging them, but it eats away at me that I'm destroying the relationship. I feel like a mean horrible person for brushing them off. I keep thinking that I'm making a grave mistake and I need to message them and apologize for being distant and try to save it. But in the end, everyone around me is telling me they're toxic and hurting me, but that doesn't seem to matter. It's all so messed up and I don't know how to disconnect without feeling like I'm losing the most important thing in my life.
Jesus will protect you Hun. He is faithful and He will never forsake you. I'm talking from experience. Let no one deceive you Hun. Jesus lives and He is true. He loves and He is near you since your childhood. All you have to do, is to believe and you will realize it. I know you will have so many questions to ask Him and He is ready to answer them all. He made you and He will fight for you. But first, give Him a chance to reveal His love and His beautiful Kingdom to you. He is ever ready to Heal you dear. call upon the name Jesus and He will hear and answer you. He is real. You can test it and He will show Himself to you. Cry unto Him and He will answer. Just talk to Him that's all even if you don't entirely believe dear. You will definitely testify. I pray that the Lord will Help you and He wants betray you because He sticks close more than a brother.
i always feel like i need to force some distance between myself and my fp but i had never connected a purpose to it. it was superficial and pointless and just caused commotion. now i know what i need to work on! thank you so much. i will work on building my sense of self
God is this dynamic soul crushing to manage. Especially when neurotypical people just tell you not to be codependent and have a "conventional relationship". Just when you catch yourself and end one of these relationships, you end up creating another. Great video.
Dr. Daniel, your videos have helped me understand myself and change my life. By changing my life for the positive I have changed my family’s life as well. A million thanks for caring about humanity.
I never see anything about when a person doesn’t want to play the role of favorite person. Shouldn’t there be some kind of consent. The role of favorite person can be extremely stressful. I was in a relationship with a person who I believe has bpd and saw me as her favorite person. I don’t think she is diagnosed and confused it with romance. The constant need for support was suffocating. Once the pandemic hit it obviously became more stressful. She ended up not being able to pay rent and moved back with her mom. I was already staying with my mom who is diagnosed with bpd. During the pandemic I was bouncing back and forth between the two and I started to have a mental breakdown. When the girl moved back to her mothers we would stay in touch on the phone. And it would be like a four hour phone call where she would talk about her stress mostly. When she wasn’t talking about stress it was an effort not to talk about it, which just made for really boring conversation while I’m stressed. I would also spend about six hours a day with my mom, who was a mess. We never had a relationship on good terms as she was regularly abusive through out my life. Eventually I had to tell the girl that it was stressful to hear about her problems constantly and she ended up never calling me again. My mom ended up selling her house and tried to get me to move with her constantly. I continually decline. It’s obvious my mom has decided that my life is in shambles and I may as well be her favorite person and move with her. I believe her motivation was that I was being kind to this girl and she wanted that for her self. I’ve told my mom in the past we can be cordial but I’m not going to go out of my way to build a relationship. She has destroyed so much in my life and I don’t want to play the mamas boy role that she envisions for me. It’s kind of an insane notion if you were to consider the level of abuse dealt. Mentally I don’t do so well my self. I am possibly bpd as well. I feel like her therapist is helping her to find a way back into my life. I just think that’s irresponsible and unprofessional. I feel she is a lazy old woman ready for retirement who doesn’t have any intention on working with my mom on her bpd so she takes advantage of my mothers focus on me and just gives her ideas on how to get back in my life. It’s either that or my mom doesn’t tell her how I feel. I doubt that though. I’m just wondering why I never see any videos that touch on when someone doesn’t want to be a favorite person. As if who ever you choose will just play that role like they have no choice. I guess maybe people with bpd back off if they see a sign with a stranger but when it’s someone who you know already they may not be so deterred in trying to establish that relationship. Especially the fact that when you already know the person they may be desperate and feel you are their only option. I’d like to at least stay in touch with my mom for any problems I can help with but I am not going to be a favorite person and if she doesn’t stop trying I’m probably going to have to cut ties. I’m done with my life taking a back seat.
Thank you for explaining it in this way. I have some BPD traits, and my psychiatrist never sat me down and explained these more nuanced things. As I learn more about BDP and how these traits may effect my perceptions and actions, I get a sense of who I am outside of the BPD traits as I continue in my mental health journey. That has a lot of utility.
Problem is that the FP is getting the impression that the individual with bpd is actually not very interested in the relationship due to the testing and push and pull behaviour. Its really exhausting for the FP.
Dr. Fox. Thank you for your videos. Ever since I was diagnosed with BPD I have been reading articles and watching videos about it. Your videos are so far the most helpful resource I have found. You always address the issue clearly and give some very helpful tips and solutions. I showed my ex-fp one of your videos talking about favorite person. Now we are both trying to make the relationship healthier. And I stop using the term "favorite person" to describe him. I feel a little bit detached to him, which usually makes me very sad but now I feel better. I am more confident to be on my own and I no longer need his encouragements to get me through tough tasks. Keep up the good work Dr. Fox!
Thank you for the helpful information, hoping for a video in the future on how to cope with anhedonia & how to have an identity if you don't enjoy anything.
this described me to a T. i know ppl get tired having to interact but it's also tiring for those without a stable sense of self because we just keep questioning if we're doing the right thing.
Would it be a good idea to avoid contact with a favorite person until recovery or would that just make it easier to fall back into an old habit? I'm not sure if I should attempt to maintain contact while working through this or not.
I’m so grateful for your videos 🤩 I have a massive problem with favourite person. I become so infatuated with my favourite person that I almost literally can not stop thinking about them ever (it’s a miracle I can get things done in my life). They are almost permanently in my thoughts, my first FP is my previous therapist and my most recent is my current therapist. I can’t bare it when these relationships end, it’s been 3 months since I saw my previous therapist and not a day has gone by since I haven’t thought excessively about him. These two people are the only humans that bring me to a feeling of pure joy, hope and safety, they care and understand me like nobody ever has. I can’t comprehend life without both of them, I’m so scared of what will happen when I end up finishing with this current therapist because that will mean I won’t have either of them in my life anymore. They are 2 of the best in the state that I live in, I won’t find better than them. My life will be back in my own hands and devoid of their safety, care and wisdom. It’s to scary and lonely to ever imagine. I wish I had a new brain, my current brain feels like it’s in a constant pathological loop and that’s after completing 12 months of DBT and 2 years of intensive weekly therapy. I’ve made some improvements but no where near enough to break free from the chains of my BPD abandonment and hopelessness. I’m so scared and sad of my future without them, it’s unbearable. I want a new brain, this one is too faulty, ineffective, inaccurate and exhausting.
My favorite person has also been my therapist, unfortunately this relationship ended due to my obsession with him I stalked him which obviously ended in termination
Nellie, is this something you've shared with your current therapist or would feel comfortable sharing? Maybe they can help you work through these feelings.
Avery H I did share it with my previous therapist and tbh I think he caught some feelings in the process too. We would have passionate arguments anytime I disagreed or challenged him, he would get really angry at me sometimes but he said it was because he cared about me. He meant well but he and I both let it get too personal. I feel completely in love with him and still am. My current therapist is exceptional at boundaries and he has been helpful in helping me understand my dysfunction, he keeps reminding me that we are all Bozo’s on a bus lol. He always reminds me that he isn’t perfect and that I’m seeing him through the eyes of a little child. He is helping me grow up I guess, even so I wish he was my real life dad lol
All hope is not lost dear. All you have to do is to call Jesus. He will save and help you because He loved you so much that He died for you and resurrected on the third day just save you from sin, death and eternal damnation. For the Bible says, the devil came to steal, kill and to destroy but Jesus Christ has come to give us abundant life. All these are the works of the enemy but Jesus is there to save so there is an immense Hope for you. He wants to be your favorite person dear. He desires to heal you. All you need is to believe then you will behold the manifestation of the glory of God. The bible says again that 'whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved'. That's just it. Just believe. Shout the name Jesus and cry unto Him and He will save you. If you are already a believer know that God will never forsake you. The word of God says without faith it is impossible to please God. Have faith dear and He will heal you. Pray and read the bible. Cos if we being wicked give good things to our children, how much more will our heavenly Father give good gifts to those that ask Him. By the Stripes of our Lord Jesus Christ we are Healed. I pray that God will deliver you in Jesus name. Amen
I have watched many of your videos, and continue to watch. I applaud you for not making me feel like a piece of shit because I suffer from a disorder that has always been a backdrop of my life. If I could just write a book, I guarantee that it would be a best seller. This doctor has some of the best insight into a disorder that I wish that I did not have. His calming voice , his lack of arrogance helps me get through some of my " triggered times " . By listening to his voice , and his reasoning it seems to have a calming effect, and affect on me. I have lived some turmoltrious times, but now I am learning baby step by baby step each day how to recognize and deal with my worst days.
That's a really nice suite. What fabric is that. Also, I've recently found your channel and have been incorporating what I've learned from your videos into my life. It is helping me so much, thank you!
Thank you so much for your channel dr. fox , its made all the difference for me.Of course we dont really need our favorite person ,but isnt it nice just to have them ha ha ? I had a favorite person ,for almost an entire year ,she was the love of my life ,until the BPD core button was pushed ,the rage came out and ruined the relationship! For months and months i was thrilled to be me ! life was was heaven on earth ! I felt so confident ,I hadnt had a meltdown in awhile ,but...........now its back to the drawing board ! The good news is ,I know I can beat this thing ,Im not giving up ! i am going back into treatment ,utilizing the tools I already have ,perhaps aquiring some new ones and the next time I wont fail!
Thank you for adding this very valuable information for free and to make it so accessible. You have done an excellent job at explaining and providing hope for me and my future with bpd. Thank you.
Dr. Fox has validated what I have been feeling my whole life. I also appreciate being able to see other BPDs post on here so I know I am not alone. Dr. Fox do you do seminars?
i was on the verge of another meltdown and was frantically googling how to keep my fp; ur videos came up and i've been calm since. i have no idea what i'm doing and i've been three different therapists in the past two years and none have helped. i've never heard that i should change my core self; i need to be happy and find out i have worth. no ones ever told me to find my worth. it means a lot that that was one of the first things u said in the first bpd video i watched of yours. i dont know who i am right now and i feel like i've been driving on a pitch black road with no headlights. your words have helped me a lot, at least for now its calmed me.
Jesus Christ will show your worth dear. He will love and heal you. He is faithful. All He needs from you is to believe that He is real and He will manifest to you. He will give you an abundant life just like how He has given me. I won't lie to you dear He is real. Just cry unto Him for He hears you all the time.All hope is not lost dear. All you have to do is to call Jesus. He will save and help you because He loved you so much that He died for you and resurrected on the third day just save you from sin, death and eternal damnation. For the Bible says, the devil came to steal, kill and to destroy but Jesus Christ has come to give us abundant life. All these are the works of the enemy but Jesus is there to save so there is an immense Hope for you. All you need is to believe then you will behold the manifestation of the glory of God. The bible says again that 'whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved'. That's just it. Just believe. Shout the name Jesus and cry unto Him and He will save you. If you are already a believer know that God will never forsake you. The word of God says without faith it is impossible to please God. Have faith dear and He will heal you. Pray and read the bible. Cos if we being wicked give good things to our children, how much more will our heavenly Father give good gifts to those that ask Him. By the Stripes of our Lord Jesus Christ we are Healed. I pray that God will deliver you in Jesus name. Amen
favorite food: pizza color: blue relax: music what helps me feel good: absolutely nothing what makes you proud (of self): absolutely nothing. well shit. guess i need to keep working on it.
I got diagnosed with bpd a few weeks ago and I've been in denial about it. Yesterday I've accepted it and since then I've been looking stuff about it and I'm so BPD
Going through this right now! I'm sick and hoping to get a call from my FP to show that they care and is thinking of me just a fraction of the overwhelming, inappropriate amount of time I spend thinking of them. I try to remind myself CONSTANTLY about the VARIABLES that is probably keeping them from calling: they already checked in this week and think once is enough, they probably don't want to disturb me, they're busy, they're probably sick themselves, they're probably going through their own internal struggles about me or others etc. This person and I have only known each other 5 mths and they have said that they're letting what is developing between us grow organically. They couldn't just say we're heading towards friendship or we're developing a friendship. I think that's why I hate feeling so intensely about them too. They act like we're friends but doesn't consider me one. I know I've displayed some jarring clinginess and some aggression/sarcasm to mask my intense emotions towrds them, too, that could've been off-putting to them. Yet, right now I feel like my life and emotions are suspended and I can't feel happy, valued and just at peace until they PROVE with that call that they miss me, is thinking of me, is concerned about me and...simply...just loves me.
I am someone’s FP, she lasts for about four to five days until she crashes anyway regardless of what I do. She is overwhelmed by dark feelings of hopelessness, usually when alone and bored. That is the most scary dangerous moments of both of our lives
I’ve watched your videos for years, as someone with bpd your videos have helped me so much, given me better insight to my disorder, and made me feel understood, and not like an insane monster. Thank you so much… keep up the amazing work man!!😄👍
I’ve been diagnosed with bpd for like a year and i met my fp 8months ago. I feel so lonely bc like in the french psychology they don’t even recognise what a fp is, and when i first told my therapist about it she was just like nah it’s just some shit that u made up it aint a real thing, bc it would mean every1 have some fp even ppl who are not borderline. and then she made me feel so dumb for actually thinking that ppl could relate 2 my dumb brain and the way i act so i tried to forget about it even tho i know i have a fp and that it is true. Watching this video is really helpful so thank you, i mean it.
I’ve recently come to terms with the idea that I probably have bpd, and my fiancée is my fp. I’m going to start in on therapy with a DBT specialist because I love her more than words can express, and I want our relationship to be happier and healthier. If anyone is reading this and is in the same position: I believe in you. We can do it.
Video suggestion : running towards danger and wrong decisions verses recognising you are safe and staying home ... Making decisions in other words / connecting with the body And video on how to love yourself
So I worked really hard on myself after my first breakup. I found things that fufill me when I'm alone and single. I worked so much on my confidence that this time the relationship would be healthier. I feel like since being in a relationship I've suddenly lost myself. Suddenly all the little things, things I was happy living without, like texts or frequent phone calls, or being complimented... suddenly those things dictate how my days ago even when I try my best to keep busy. Not sure what to do
I do not like that this is how I am. I don’t want to be this way, I’m going through divorce number 2 ( we are trying to figure out ways to fix this) he was my person, we would look at each other and both just smile, never had love like it before. Because of the way I am it had to end. I just got diagnosed at 27 with BPD , I’ve Seen two different doctors and I’ve done therapy. I wish people would understand I don’t try to hurt anyone. I’m saying anything the way anyone is hearing it. I can’t hear how I offend anyone. I trust Not a single person. Everyone leaves. Venting because I really do like your videos. Thank you
Thank you again, Dr. Fox, for helping me continue to understand, and heal from my BPD. All my life I have struggled with psychiatrists, medical physicians, and therapists as FP. It’s been so painful to feel like I’m trapped in this addiction with little understanding from anyone. Your practical steps to self healing here in are a true God send. I began applying them immediately. I already feel somewhat liberated! I can’t thank you enough.
My psychologist is refusing to diagnose me because i'm "just a teen" but i literally qualify for diagnosis even more closely than my aunt who IS diagnosed :///
Your videos are always useful, helpful and we are thankful that you are a doctor who understands this diorder and is committed n certified in helping those who have this. 🌟🌟🌟💯 BIG THANK YOU 💯🌟🌟🌟
Dr. Fox you are awesome i have been help my self by watching your videos is such a help to have some guide to manage my personality i am 49 yeRs old and just a few years ago i found About BPD thank for all your i wish I live near you and you were my therapist here in Florida arent to many BPD specialist.thank you.
What should you do when your favourite person leaves you? I'm learning a lot about myself without them but I miss them an awful lot and don't know how to cope with that part of it. Have you any advice?
@@RachelWrites I'm usually the opposite, I move on from romantic relationships very quickly but I've realised this is really unhealthy. I'm deliberately staying single for at least a year (my fp is pretty much always my partner) to try and work on my self/ living without a 'favourite person'. It's been tough, but it has been about 6 months since me and my ex broke up and it is definitely getting easier now
@@neutrallynonsensical3477 Everyone is different. That's the thing about mental illness, you can't put anyone in a box because we all experience it differently. I hope things are better and wish you the best. :)
This was a wonderful video to watch.. But also...*Tina Belcher sized groan* Having fps are the wooooooorst... I NEVER WANT TO PUT MYSELF THROUGH HAVING ONE OF THOSE AGAIN!! I SERIOUSLY NEED TO FIND AWAY TO KICK THIS HABIT🤣🤣😭😭🤣🤣
I have been the fp more than once throughout my life without realising it. To be honest it started with spending a whole childhood in which at least one if not both parents had undiagnosed forms of bpd.
Idk if this will Help anyone, but I grew up in an overly religious environment. One thing I learned was if you were told to watch what you say because you’ll speak something into existence, this is damaging. My parents and grandmother told me that whenever i said something negative and tried to talk about how I feel. That means i’ve been neglecting how I feel and haven’t been accepting any negative emotions and talking through them. It sounds helpful, but it isn’t. It makes it worse. Hope this helps and brings realization.
I just went through the exercise of identifying what we bring to the relationship and where it becomes unhealthy. I’m seeing a lot of the unhealthy parts coming from me because I desperately want to be accepted and have certainty. I lack the patience to give things time and create pressure leaving us at this standstill where both sides shut down and it becomes uncomfortable to where he needs to leave.
Dr. Fox, can't thank you enough for this video - all of them, really! They've given me such clarity as you've explained things so easy for me to understand. I'm so glad I found you. I clicked the bell so I don't miss any of your new videos!Thank you kindly for such invaluable information!
You're so welcome and thank you for your kind support of the channel. It means a lot when people help support the cause of putting out honest and research based information. Thank you and be well.
I have to leave my fp and I feel like I'm dying. I feel like I have no reason to live. I was diagnosed with dpd, but one of my most intense symptoms is fp, so idk. I watch bpd stuff because it's relatable.
its so tiring when you realize that it happenedd again and there is a new person that has become your fp and you know its gonna be so much pain from there on
It's been really hard for me because while certain breakups devastated me, and I realize now it was because of my BPD and they were my favorite person at the time, I didn't know I had BPD until about 2 weeks ago when I was trying to figure out why I was obsessed with my male best friend and how to get over him and I found stuff about BPD and favorite person and it checked every single box. I am so glad for more answers as to why I am the way I am but it's so hard to change those thought patterns when they've been that way for almost 35 years in my case. Kinda sucks my husband never gave me a chance for him to become my favorite person, he moved in after 2 weeks of knowing each other lol almost 10 years later and through a whole bunch of shit that should have broke us, I know that I am grateful for him that he puts up with all my shit. No one else would, my family is even sick of me sometimes lol
@@CORKY247kinda sucks that your husband never gave you a chance to become his fp? Im sorry that’s such an odd confusing sentence to say, can you explain what you mean?
@@GhANeCI think you may have read it in reverse.
watching this my bpd was like "we been caught, hide!"
Same. That spongebob meme where plankton goes, “Don’t let the flame die out” is playing inside my head.
I have a very hard time defferentiating between if I love that person, or just have a very strong bond with them. Whenever somebody is nice to me and pays attention to me, I get a crush, I think. It makes it very hard if you are in a committed relationship, because I know that I don't want to be in a relationship with them, but I don't want them to be in a relationship with someone else. I feel like I would lose that bond with them and it makes me so scared.
It's so relatable! And isn't it so traumatising and heart breaking that sometime u think it'd have been better if u never met?
This is exactly how i feel about my husband.
Oh my god..this makes me not want to become close to anyone though. Then I end up craving intimacy, at arms length? Weird
Same.
This happens to me as well. I have had this happen since I was very young. Any guy that would pay attention to me would automatically become my crush. I’m married now and it still happens every now and again. It’s incredibly frustrating. I would love to just be friends with people.
I think it can feel much worse when your favorite person is also unhealthy on an emotional level, such as someone who is abusive and/or has NPD. I used to be really drawn to that type of person but going to therapy has helped me recognize what healthy relationships look like.
Or if they also have BPD. Heightens issues. The challenge is as in NPD, that is usually so familiar to BPD peeps. For another BPD person as a fav person, the bond can be so powerful; I mean someone who gets this "too-muchness" and doesn't judge you for it? Love can seem deep and rare, but then the bad stuff, theirs and yours. Severe and hard to ride two different people's waves.
Yes! My favorite person is a malignant narc who gives me the silent treatment weeks on ends. :(
My partner of 10 years doesn't believe in BPD, and with my self loathing, I can rarely tell if I'm being abused or if his behavior is the natural answer to my formerly wild life.
I can relate to that heavily. My favorite person is bipolar. It has been incredibly difficult.
Nothing like being suffocated by another person's neediness! BPD's need to learn to stay single!
I’ve found it useful to read a note I made for me to read before contacting my FP. I hope this is helpful for someone out there. Please read below:
Maddie
Reasons to not contact Maddie
~ Don’t contact her when I’m feeling needy or abandoned. Period. If I’m feeling anxious don’t message or see her.
Before contacting Maddie remember:
The friendship with Maddie is stable, secure, and at the exact right level of closeness. She sincerely cares and enjoys my company and communication. She is being extremely gracious given my age and the oddity of this situation of her being my favorite person. I’m sure she’s aware that my affinity for her is beyond normal therefore it’s absolutely necessary for me to respect her and protect her happiness by maintaining good boundaries.
Remember that while she does care she doesn’t need to be burdened. She has zero responsibility for my happiness and she has zero tolerance for unnecessary bullshit. Being a burden or unnecessarily interrupting her day will only cause her to rightfully cut off all communication.
Reasons to contact Maddie
~ When communicating is useful not just for me but also for her.
James Herrington this is helpful. Thank you.
So very helpful. Thank you
Thank you so much for your courage about this boundary with your favorite person. So helpful.
dude that literally says cut off all connections.
@@anotherranger2924 Yes it does, which can happen if you aren't careful. A close former friend has unchecked BPD and I didn't realize until far too late that I was her favorite person. Iived with her and her husband for a while. Our relationship got weirdly sexual (she had a crush on me, I didn't reciprocate those feelings and had made that clear for years). From there it went to financially sabotaging herself and everyone else in the apartment, I assume because she was afraid any of us moving would risk me abandoning her completely. When my SO moved in and started working online, former friend started stealing the money we'd give them to pay the WiFi, claim it was paid, and try to blame my SO when the internet would get throttled. Attempting to talk to her or encourage her to get help regardless of the atmosphere or her mood would be met with brush-offs or explosions.
She left me no choice but to cut contact because I could no longer trust her. I had told her a few months prior to my move out date what month I was planning to leave, but by the time I found a place, I knew she would sabotage me if I told her.
She spread a smear campaign after that, telling people I just up and left with no notice.
I refuse to speak to her or have anything to do with her unless she gets help, and I make sure she has no way of knowing where I live. She recently popped up in one of my recently abandoned social media inboxes throwing petty insults and it's been over a year since we've had any contact.
favorite food: boulet
favorite color: pink
helps me relax: fp
helps me feel good: fp
makes me feel proud fp
... do u see my issue
Literally my answer
literally even when I'm js playing a game I ask myself if my fp would also like it
I hate being like this. It’s so exhausting. I start to feel better then I find a favorite person and my whole world is turned upside down again. I feel like I’ve worked so hard on myself but then it all goes out the window
i feel you😭😭 but it’s not a linear journey! We’re still picking up new little things every day! You know more about it today than you did a year ago❤much love
I tried going to a psychiatrist he basically told me to exercise and pray, he made it seem as if im making up all of this, and here you are Dr.Fox helping me understand myself every single time you post a video.
Thank you!!
exactly. i had a same experience with you. my psychiatrist ignored the main issue which is BPD. and made general advice like, praying, exercise, go out more etc........ it's impossible to find a psychiatrist who wants to talk and can handle BPD.
While i acknowledge what he says is helpful to maintain a healthy mental state it doesnt fix what we are going through, the emotional instability , the rage, the self destructive behaviour , the mood swings and the worst is the suicidal thoughts i cant get rid off.
I'm just letting you know you are not alone in this.
I changed my psychiatrist first appointment is next week.
Dont give up!
@@delll372 Its not impossible!
If you can, search on-line in your area for a psychiatrist OR psychologist who has personality disorders as a part of their scope of practice. If there isn't anything specific on-line then asking people at a health clinic for a referral.
Just like going to a general practioner doctor and expecting expert advice on cancer treatment isn't going to be as helpful as going to a Dr. who specializes in Cancer treatment. The general practitioner Dr. may be aware of it but not aware of very specific issue and patterns related to that disease.
Dr. Fox is an example of someone who is familiar with Personality disorders. Dr. Todd Grande( on youtube) is also familiar.
Good luck in finding help for your long-term health!
those recommendations are not themselves invalid, however, they can be a useful part of managing depression, anxiety, and other intense emotions. It may be the psychiatrist did not give you a context for this. However, psychiatrists mainly do medication management nowadays. Wouldn't it make sense to see a therapist weekly?
@@watcherwlc53 my Therapist doesn't diagnose or provide context either, which is something I have a lot of trouble understanding. In my Profession, I have to cite and have a reference list for any recommendations I give (I'm a licensed Dietitian), whereas I feel not part of the treatment and have to trust this guy who won't even let me know anything about himself--like the wizard of Oz behind the curtain.
Friends with BPD: no one can give you the love and security that only you can give yourselves. The rest of the people just can give you support but also they have their own life and problems.
So true and I try to be rational, reasonable and empathetic about I but it still doesn't help the splitting, ruminations and longing .😊
oh wow lowkey wish this comment did any good in treating my BPD... we have no control over this lmfao.
@@eren-mh6tp 😪😔 I didn't mean to make you feel bad, but for us without BPD it's also hard to cope with the love one wBPD.
@@TerryGuzmanMartinez I hear you Teresa. Sometimes when a loved with with BPD says they can’t do anything about their BPD I want to say “Yeah, neither can I.”
@@willtroy1986 I'm sorry, really. I'd like to help the one I love but I can't. But I know that the first step is the one with BPD to recognize he/she has a problem and then to ask for help and most important to do the work, otherwise it's practically impossible to help (sorry for my English).
I've been learning to manage BPD without knowing it was BPD... This is so validating when my entire life I've been told it's just PTSD
I’m glad that you found the video helpful and I wish you all the best.
@@DrDanielFox I also got your BPD workbook and it's helped significantly so thank you so much
You very well could have CPTSD, or comorbidity with PTSD. Have you been professionally diagnosed and met the 5 out of 8 traits Borderline criteria in the DSM?
can you maybe make a video on how to have a healthy FP relationship with someone?
Yes, agree too
It hurts to know that I'm REALLY a person with BPD. Thank you, Dr. Daniel Fox. Every each of your video really help me to face my difficult times.
Hope you are doing well and healing. Don't fault yourself for having BPD, it is not your fault in anyway. Hope you are staying away from all of the misinformation and misunderstanding of your diagnosis because people with BPD are just as beautiful and loveable as any other person. Best wishes to you ❤
Please do a video on BPD and empathy lack of or over excess of empathy
i have the over excess of empathy and i cant look at someone without wanting to burst into tears because i feel like they are feeling so much pain so please do dr. fox
I’ve been watching a channel called “recovery mum,” she’s been extremely helpful for me. She recovered from BPD and has a video on this. Check it out!
@@Leahv103 omg i definitely will!!!!
he has a video about empathy but not 100% what you’re asking abt. it’s called empathy paradox!
Curteous wrong
i literally just told my favourite person last night that it feels like i can’t exist without them and how stupid and confronting that seems but this video really helped me feel validated, like there is some kind of reason as to why i’m like this - that i’m not just crazy. thank you
that being said they also told me that they don’t want to talk to me much for the next month because they need to focus on their studies and i’m basically taking up all their time. i don’t really know how to help myself though i wish it more than anything. i don’t want to hurt the people i love...
Your videos about favorite person relationships have made it so much easier to accept and work through this tendency within myself. I used to be extremely ashamed of my attachment. I hope you keep posting more on this topic! Thank you so much!
I don’t have bpd but this is how I’m with my best friend... I can’t function without her and it has a massive impact on my life, whenever I try and explain how much my obsession with her dictates my life people don’t get it and I can’t get the help I need. I feel like I’m driving her away and I can’t cope
You might be the first psychologist who actually uses the term Favorite Person and I honestly love you for it because you're being relatable and connected to BPD sufferers.
As someone diagnosed with severe bpd seeing these videos reaffirm the things I’ve learned about myself and through countless therapists. I’m very self aware of what I do and why all of my relationships have led me to be abandoned and avoided. I’ve not been very good with my therapy and most of my therapists don’t specialize in my disorder and it’s led to many failed attempts at recovery and learning better habits. I latch of anxiously to people mostly people I really really like and I’m glued to them constantly texting constantly needing reassurance and an hour without hearing from them is like centuries and I’m crippled like I can’t work or eat or sleep unless I know everything is ok. The fear that they left me for someone else is overwhelming or that they left me forever for some reason is crippling and I’ve often wanted to send angry messages but then when they message me or call it’s like some took their foot off of the water hose and I can breathe and function and I’m overly apologetic. This common for me among other habits and triggers that me to feeling overwhelmingly angry and bitter towards myself believing I’m forever an unlovable unhealthy person who is a mistake. I do whatever I can to be liked and love by others and I want others to need me. I’ve made threats against myself and done stupid things to avoid abandonment. I’m just not healthy. There’s just this void that no matter what I do no love is ever enough love and my sadness is anguish my anger is rage and when someone does something they should never do to me or someone else they are evil but I put my favorite people on a high pedestal until they let me down.
same exactly me
Same
I have found myself lashing out at my FP whim I’ve been married to for 20 years. He is a covert narcissist. I knew something never connected all these years up until almost 4 years ago when he discarded me in a very brutal and out of the blue scenario. I was so devastated that I had to be taken to the hospital y ambulance. I literally cried for almost 8 hours straight in the hospital. Nothing they were giving me would calm me down. My blood pressure was through the roof and I had the worst headache all those hours that I have ever had. They eventually sent a case worker in my room to talk to me. As I began telling her what was wrong, she told me I was in a codependent relationship. I didn’t know what that was so I had to research it to get better clarity. I list some strength on the right side of my body and they wanted to transfer me to another hospital to have a MRI done. They believed I had what’s called a TIA, which is a small stroke that comes and goes so fast, only a MRI could see it. I refused and wanted to leave. I had to get my mom to come sign me out because they didn’t fell comfortable just discharging me. So I was signed out into my moms care. I was 45 at the time. He ended up coming back 3 weeks later. It has been steadily going downhill ever since. Now I respond with anger and rage when he ignores me. I left him 1 month ago, and he is angry that I left like I did. I notice that I wanted him to feel what I felt
Dr. Fox, I'm 51 would you consider doing a video on BPD and how the traits manifests in this age group. I've heard there is a big difference. Thank you.
Dr Fox, are you able to do a video on maintaining healthy boundaries for what would be judged objectively as toxic interpersonal relationships? I’m struggling with this one. Thank you for all the work you do.
Dr. Daniel, you have helped me insurmountable ways, and watching your videos as they progress helps bring me back to reality time and time again- Thank you so much.
I recently ended things with my FP- I'm proud of myself because it was toxic, but this video makes me re-realise how tragic the situation was and how glad I am to be out of that bad situation, and that regardless of the situation- I shouldn't need anyone- relationship or friends or family; to feel like me. Only me can figure out how to feel comfortable in myself. This video will serve me well when I am in a rut and feel that need to go back to "comfort" in others again. Thank you again, I am a huge fan, please keep making awesome videos
Thank you for seeing people with BPD as people!
I'm so glad this video was helpful for you. I wish you well.
A side issue, very good cinematic lighting, to have your half face illuminated, and other profile in the dark
Your videos are SO SO SO useful, Dr. Daniel. They helped me a lot as well.
Let’s share what our beliefs and values are from the video. I’ll go first!
Fave color: mint blue (not green!)
Fave food: pork belly
What helps me relax: meditation while stretching
What helps me feel good: wearing a new outfit that I picked out alone and just washed.
What makes me proud: cooking or baking something new that tastes great, and eating the leftovers.
Who wants to go next?
favorite color: Black
Favorite food:🍕
What helps me relax: Gabapentin, youtube, my cats
What helps me feel good: Kissing my cats, eating tasty foods and napping
What makes me proud: I’m still a loving and giving person despite attracting narcs. 😊
Someone else’s turn now 😀
I feel like I did this with my best friends in the past. I still kind of do it and it is soooo scary to see that most of my behaviors and things that I did/do can be all explained bc of bpd
One of the hardest parts about this whole “favorite person” issue is that abandonment/rejection issues cause it all. Which means they likely also cause other issues. Like feeling connected with people who aren’t great for us. Bc our central nervous systems are seeking familiarity. Which means the “fav person” is often NOT dependable, not secure, not the things we’re trying to get from them.
Also…we should talk a lot more about how the fact that we have “fav people” means we have so much more healing to do and we should be focusing on that.
Thank you doctor for what you do for us.
I'd love to see a video on OCD and BPD. These go hand in hang with me, I don't organize or clean or anything but I think myself into routines and thought patterns that cause BPD episodes. There's not enough good videos on internal OCD and especially the relationship with BPD
TpSpider yes! same with me I have had issues where I’m so obsessed with my personality being perfect I don’t know if this is because of my ocd and bpd mixed together or something my doctor hasn’t been able to help me with that.
Ocd sucks but crosses over symptom wise with BPD, anxiety, ptsd with favorite person, pure O and other symptoms
I like how you give me ways to cope not just ways I'm f***** up
That's just it ...the borderline mind is always changing
My best friend is my FP. She's helped me so much and I feel I'm not that dependend on her anymore. 😊
This favorite person notion has had me also nodding my head in recognition of past behaviors with different friends over the years- a new concept to my mind!! (I am also tripping on the agoraphobia thing, still, today).
Hi, future licensed clinical psychologist here. You are _so_ much less condescending than the famous Dr. Peterson. You talk more about what the symptoms and characteristics for what they are rather than painting a "lower" image for someone who is borderline. Thank you for the better warmth. :)
update: nvm this video hit too close to home oop I'm in tears
I think it is valuable to add that my favourite person was actually a pet and that can happen as well, making it even easier to maintain a codependent relationship. Now my pet has passed away, and I'm having extreme difficulty in living and being happy as well because with bpd he always gave me the sense of need and self that I needed, and it functioned as much more than just a pet to me - making me in fact function properly. He never flawed in emotionally supplying me (as a person eventually would), but now death has taken him away and I'm completely empty and broken. As a child. (very neglected and socially isolated), I'd hold a teddy bear 24hrs as an impersonated imaginary friend that would never leave me. My point is that favourite persons don't necessarily need to be human, but entities. I guess.
I feel like this about my cat who just passed away… was the only stable relationship since I got him when I was 18… and I’m illogically mad at him for dying of cancer because now I’m all alone 😢
My favorite person is in Tennessee right now. He lives in Miami and I feel abandoned. I haven’t talked to him in two days but he did text me. I’ve been avoiding talking to him and calling him but I find myself constantly thinking about him and fantasizing about him. I know we aren’t in a relationship but I can’t stop telling myself this. He’s so much apart of my day that I try not to be busy but when I can’t get ahold of him, I feel like he’s replacing me. I so needed to hear this class Dr Fox. I’ve been so dependent on someone that I really don’t know how to deal with myself and my own emotions. Thank you for this and this is only the beginning.
I've got BPD and have just come across your video. They're great 🙂
Glad you like them! Welcome.
This was very helpful. My favorite person is my therapist and it gets so overwhelming at times because I know I depend on her and expect things of her that I know she can’t give me. Like I wish she could care for me like a friend but I know there are boundaries and she has to keep in professional. I haven’t told her she is my FP , I’m too afraid to but feel I need to.
As someone w BPD, I had to seek out your video on it because I’m trying very hard to keep my FP the guy I’m dating at a healthy distance. I’ve been really struggling with identity lately since I’ve had a lot of situational/life upheaval/change in the past year.
My last FP and I were both very toxic for each other, and I do not want a repeat of this with my current partner 🖤
And as a psych student and a person w BPD I LOVE your videos
I've been in recovery for 17+ years and I've told many other borderlines this exact thing when it comes to FP relationships but it took me to be really hurt by someone who was an FP. After she left I realized she didn't do much for our friendship, I was very much being used for my kindness, i was honest etc but wasn't same other way around. She broke my boundaries, talked about me behind my back and publicly shamed with her friends. So since then I've not allowed anyone to be that close to me again. I refused to be vulnerable with anyone because it was shared with everyone. I dissociated for almost 2 years and attempted suicide not because of this single person but many events that happened all at once from my parents abandoning me, other friends, losing a long term relationship that I ended due to emotional abuse. I retook many programs dbt, cbt, emotional regulation, interpersonal relationships etc so that I could get back to my high functioning self. I'm still on my journey but I don't depend on anyone anymore. I just depend on myself.
The worst thing that can happen to someone with BPD is to be blocked and rejected by the Favourite person. The emotional wound is killing me inside rn
I'm kind of lost with my life related to this. My favorite person is kind of toxic and has hurt me a lot, but I've cared about them and have needed them for a lot of my life, since we were teenagers (we're the same age). Recently they've become verbally abusive and generally have developed some toxic behavior, and it makes me feel awful about myself and I wonder if they even like me anymore, but I need them in my life so badly, I love them so much, and they're the only person in my life I've been that open and free with about everything. I was able to be myself around them without worrying or censoring any part of myself, but they got really close to me and we became intimate, but they always talked about me like I was too crazy to be considered seriously, or they would talk about dating other people in front of me, and even say things to me or make jokes about certain traumas I've been through that really, really hurt me, but I love them so much I can't detach. I've tried recently, even stopped messaging them, but it eats away at me that I'm destroying the relationship. I feel like a mean horrible person for brushing them off. I keep thinking that I'm making a grave mistake and I need to message them and apologize for being distant and try to save it. But in the end, everyone around me is telling me they're toxic and hurting me, but that doesn't seem to matter. It's all so messed up and I don't know how to disconnect without feeling like I'm losing the most important thing in my life.
Jesus will protect you Hun. He is faithful and He will never forsake you. I'm talking from experience. Let no one deceive you Hun. Jesus lives and He is true. He loves and He is near you since your childhood. All you have to do, is to believe and you will realize it. I know you will have so many questions to ask Him and He is ready to answer them all. He made you and He will fight for you. But first, give Him a chance to reveal His love and His beautiful Kingdom to you. He is ever ready to Heal you dear. call upon the name Jesus and He will hear and answer you. He is real. You can test it and He will show Himself to you. Cry unto Him and He will answer. Just talk to Him that's all even if you don't entirely believe dear. You will definitely testify. I pray that the Lord will Help you and He wants betray you because He sticks close more than a brother.
i always feel like i need to force some distance between myself and my fp but i had never connected a purpose to it. it was superficial and pointless and just caused commotion. now i know what i need to work on! thank you so much. i will work on building my sense of self
God is this dynamic soul crushing to manage. Especially when neurotypical people just tell you not to be codependent and have a "conventional relationship". Just when you catch yourself and end one of these relationships, you end up creating another. Great video.
Dr. Daniel, your videos have helped me understand myself and change my life. By changing my life for the positive I have changed my family’s life as well. A million thanks for caring about humanity.
I never see anything about when a person doesn’t want to play the role of favorite person. Shouldn’t there be some kind of consent. The role of favorite person can be extremely stressful.
I was in a relationship with a person who I believe has bpd and saw me as her favorite person. I don’t think she is diagnosed and confused it with romance. The constant need for support was suffocating. Once the pandemic hit it obviously became more stressful. She ended up not being able to pay rent and moved back with her mom. I was already staying with my mom who is diagnosed with bpd. During the pandemic I was bouncing back and forth between the two and I started to have a mental breakdown. When the girl moved back to her mothers we would stay in touch on the phone. And it would be like a four hour phone call where she would talk about her stress mostly. When she wasn’t talking about stress it was an effort not to talk about it, which just made for really boring conversation while I’m stressed. I would also spend about six hours a day with my mom, who was a mess. We never had a relationship on good terms as she was regularly abusive through out my life. Eventually I had to tell the girl that it was stressful to hear about her problems constantly and she ended up never calling me again.
My mom ended up selling her house and tried to get me to move with her constantly. I continually decline. It’s obvious my mom has decided that my life is in shambles and I may as well be her favorite person and move with her. I believe her motivation was that I was being kind to this girl and she wanted that for her self. I’ve told my mom in the past we can be cordial but I’m not going to go out of my way to build a relationship. She has destroyed so much in my life and I don’t want to play the mamas boy role that she envisions for me. It’s kind of an insane notion if you were to consider the level of abuse dealt. Mentally I don’t do so well my self. I am possibly bpd as well. I feel like her therapist is helping her to find a way back into my life. I just think that’s irresponsible and unprofessional. I feel she is a lazy old woman ready for retirement who doesn’t have any intention on working with my mom on her bpd so she takes advantage of my mothers focus on me and just gives her ideas on how to get back in my life. It’s either that or my mom doesn’t tell her how I feel. I doubt that though. I’m just wondering why I never see any videos that touch on when someone doesn’t want to be a favorite person. As if who ever you choose will just play that role like they have no choice. I guess maybe people with bpd back off if they see a sign with a stranger but when it’s someone who you know already they may not be so deterred in trying to establish that relationship. Especially the fact that when you already know the person they may be desperate and feel you are their only option. I’d like to at least stay in touch with my mom for any problems I can help with but I am not going to be a favorite person and if she doesn’t stop trying I’m probably going to have to cut ties. I’m done with my life taking a back seat.
Thank you for explaining it in this way. I have some BPD traits, and my psychiatrist never sat me down and explained these more nuanced things. As I learn more about BDP and how these traits may effect my perceptions and actions, I get a sense of who I am outside of the BPD traits as I continue in my mental health journey. That has a lot of utility.
Problem is that the FP is getting the impression that the individual with bpd is actually not very interested in the relationship due to the testing and push and pull behaviour. Its really exhausting for the FP.
Thank you Dr Fox❤️
I think I was having a bpd episode in the past few days😢but I feel much better now after rewatching a couple of your videos🥰
Happy to help!
Dr. Fox. Thank you for your videos. Ever since I was diagnosed with BPD I have been reading articles and watching videos about it. Your videos are so far the most helpful resource I have found. You always address the issue clearly and give some very helpful tips and solutions.
I showed my ex-fp one of your videos talking about favorite person. Now we are both trying to make the relationship healthier. And I stop using the term "favorite person" to describe him. I feel a little bit detached to him, which usually makes me very sad but now I feel better. I am more confident to be on my own and I no longer need his encouragements to get me through tough tasks.
Keep up the good work Dr. Fox!
my ex is my favorite person.. idk if i have BPD but this rings true to me...
Thank you for the helpful information, hoping for a video in the future on how to cope with anhedonia & how to have an identity if you don't enjoy anything.
Id also find a video like this helpful
I would love to see a video on this as well, I'm in the same place.
@@sloppylobsty9171 I think these is a one of the next big steps I need to take for myself but I just don't know what to do about I'm
this described me to a T. i know ppl get tired having to interact but it's also tiring for those without a stable sense of self because we just keep questioning if we're doing the right thing.
I always pick one person to summon in my head. It's a fantasy of an attachment. It sort of works, but it's also very painful because it's not real.
Would it be a good idea to avoid contact with a favorite person until recovery or would that just make it easier to fall back into an old habit? I'm not sure if I should attempt to maintain contact while working through this or not.
I’m so grateful for your videos 🤩
I have a massive problem with favourite person. I become so infatuated with my favourite person that I almost literally can not stop thinking about them ever (it’s a miracle I can get things done in my life). They are almost permanently in my thoughts, my first FP is my previous therapist and my most recent is my current therapist. I can’t bare it when these relationships end, it’s been 3 months since I saw my previous therapist and not a day has gone by since I haven’t thought excessively about him. These two people are the only humans that bring me to a feeling of pure joy, hope and safety, they care and understand me like nobody ever has. I can’t comprehend life without both of them, I’m so scared of what will happen when I end up finishing with this current therapist because that will mean I won’t have either of them in my life anymore. They are 2 of the best in the state that I live in, I won’t find better than them. My life will be back in my own hands and devoid of their safety, care and wisdom. It’s to scary and lonely to ever imagine. I wish I had a new brain, my current brain feels like it’s in a constant pathological loop and that’s after completing 12 months of DBT and 2 years of intensive weekly therapy. I’ve made some improvements but no where near enough to break free from the chains of my BPD abandonment and hopelessness. I’m so scared and sad of my future without them, it’s unbearable. I want a new brain, this one is too faulty, ineffective, inaccurate and exhausting.
My favorite person has also been my therapist, unfortunately this relationship ended due to my obsession with him I stalked him which obviously ended in termination
Me too!
Nellie, is this something you've shared with your current therapist or would feel comfortable sharing? Maybe they can help you work through these feelings.
Avery H I did share it with my previous therapist and tbh I think he caught some feelings in the process too. We would have passionate arguments anytime I disagreed or challenged him, he would get really angry at me sometimes but he said it was because he cared about me. He meant well but he and I both let it get too personal. I feel completely in love with him and still am. My current therapist is exceptional at boundaries and he has been helpful in helping me understand my dysfunction, he keeps reminding me that we are all Bozo’s on a bus lol. He always reminds me that he isn’t perfect and that I’m seeing him through the eyes of a little child. He is helping me grow up I guess, even so I wish he was my real life dad lol
All hope is not lost dear. All you have to do is to call Jesus. He will save and help you because He loved you so much that He died for you and resurrected on the third day just save you from sin, death and eternal damnation. For the Bible says, the devil came to steal, kill and to destroy but Jesus Christ has come to give us abundant life. All these are the works of the enemy but Jesus is there to save so there is an immense Hope for you. He wants to be your favorite person dear. He desires to heal you. All you need is to believe then you will behold the manifestation of the glory of God. The bible says again that 'whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved'. That's just it. Just believe. Shout the name Jesus and cry unto Him and He will save you. If you are already a believer know that God will never forsake you. The word of God says without faith it is impossible to please God. Have faith dear and He will heal you. Pray and read the bible. Cos if we being wicked give good things to our children, how much more will our heavenly Father give good gifts to those that ask Him. By the Stripes of our Lord Jesus Christ we are Healed. I pray that God will deliver you in Jesus name. Amen
4:30 - 5:00 got me at my core. thank you. just, thank you.
This was very helpful. I realize that my mother has been my favourite person until about two years ago. This has been extremely dysfunctional.
ive been diagnosed with bpd recently and this honestly helped me understand myself a lot more
I can’t stop watching my obsessive behavior is kicking in.
I have watched many of your videos, and continue to watch. I applaud you for not making me feel like a piece of shit because I suffer from a disorder that has always been a backdrop of my life. If I could just write a book, I guarantee that it would be a best seller. This doctor has some of the best insight into a disorder that I wish that I did not have. His calming voice , his lack of arrogance helps me get through some of my " triggered times " . By listening to his voice , and his reasoning it seems to have a calming effect, and affect on me. I have lived some turmoltrious times, but now I am learning baby step by baby step each day how to recognize and deal with my worst days.
Very helpful video…
Glad it was helpful!
I find that my favourite person can differ. Once I've exhausted one after a number of months, I'll move on to the next, in need of support.
That's a really nice suite. What fabric is that.
Also, I've recently found your channel and have been incorporating what I've learned from your videos into my life. It is helping me so much, thank you!
+Dhoulmegus 🦊👍
Thank you so much for your channel dr. fox , its made all the difference for me.Of course we dont really need our favorite person ,but isnt it nice just to have them ha ha ? I had a favorite person ,for almost an entire year ,she was the love of my life ,until the BPD core button was pushed ,the rage came out and ruined the relationship! For months and months i was thrilled to be me ! life was was heaven on earth ! I felt so confident ,I hadnt had a meltdown in awhile ,but...........now its back to the drawing board ! The good news is ,I know I can beat this thing ,Im not giving up ! i am going back into treatment ,utilizing the tools I already have ,perhaps aquiring some new ones and the next time I wont fail!
Thank you for adding this very valuable information for free and to make it so accessible. You have done an excellent job at explaining and providing hope for me and my future with bpd. Thank you.
Dr. Fox has validated what I have been feeling my whole life. I also appreciate being able to see other BPDs post on here so I know I am not alone. Dr. Fox do you do seminars?
Cathi Christian not for clients yet, just mental health professionals.
i was on the verge of another meltdown and was frantically googling how to keep my fp; ur videos came up and i've been calm since. i have no idea what i'm doing and i've been three different therapists in the past two years and none have helped. i've never heard that i should change my core self; i need to be happy and find out i have worth. no ones ever told me to find my worth. it means a lot that that was one of the first things u said in the first bpd video i watched of yours. i dont know who i am right now and i feel like i've been driving on a pitch black road with no headlights. your words have helped me a lot, at least for now its calmed me.
Jesus Christ will show your worth dear. He will love and heal you. He is faithful. All He needs from you is to believe that He is real and He will manifest to you. He will give you an abundant life just like how He has given me. I won't lie to you dear He is real. Just cry unto Him for He hears you all the time.All hope is not lost dear. All you have to do is to call Jesus. He will save and help you because He loved you so much that He died for you and resurrected on the third day just save you from sin, death and eternal damnation. For the Bible says, the devil came to steal, kill and to destroy but Jesus Christ has come to give us abundant life. All these are the works of the enemy but Jesus is there to save so there is an immense Hope for you. All you need is to believe then you will behold the manifestation of the glory of God. The bible says again that 'whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved'. That's just it. Just believe. Shout the name Jesus and cry unto Him and He will save you. If you are already a believer know that God will never forsake you. The word of God says without faith it is impossible to please God. Have faith dear and He will heal you. Pray and read the bible. Cos if we being wicked give good things to our children, how much more will our heavenly Father give good gifts to those that ask Him. By the Stripes of our Lord Jesus Christ we are Healed. I pray that God will deliver you in Jesus name. Amen
favorite food: pizza
color: blue
relax: music
what helps me feel good: absolutely nothing
what makes you proud (of self): absolutely nothing.
well shit. guess i need to keep working on it.
I feel ya... I feel so empty that Nothing can bring me satisfaction
I got diagnosed with bpd a few weeks ago and I've been in denial about it. Yesterday I've accepted it and since then I've been looking stuff about it and I'm so BPD
Going through this right now!
I'm sick and hoping to get a call from my FP to show that they care and is thinking of me just a fraction of the overwhelming, inappropriate amount of time I spend thinking of them. I try to remind myself CONSTANTLY about the VARIABLES that is probably keeping them from calling: they already checked in this week and think once is enough, they probably don't want to disturb me, they're busy, they're probably sick themselves, they're probably going through their own internal struggles about me or others etc.
This person and I have only known each other 5 mths and they have said that they're letting what is developing between us grow organically. They couldn't just say we're heading towards friendship or we're developing a friendship.
I think that's why I hate feeling so intensely about them too. They act like we're friends but doesn't consider me one. I know I've displayed some jarring clinginess and some aggression/sarcasm to mask my intense emotions towrds them, too, that could've been off-putting to them.
Yet, right now I feel like my life and emotions are suspended and I can't feel happy, valued and just at peace until they PROVE with that call that they miss me, is thinking of me, is concerned about me and...simply...just loves me.
Be careful of testing people. I wish you well.
Thanks @@DrDanielFox! That's EXACTLY what I'm doing. I'm aware of it and trying to push back on it. You too be well.
Your guidelines are so helpful, thank you for your time and help, doc! I'm in love (for a short period of time lol)
I am someone’s FP, she lasts for about four to five days until she crashes anyway regardless of what I do.
She is overwhelmed by dark feelings of hopelessness, usually when alone and bored. That is the most scary dangerous moments of both of our lives
I’ve watched your videos for years, as someone with bpd your videos have helped me so much, given me better insight to my disorder, and made me feel understood, and not like an insane monster. Thank you so much… keep up the amazing work man!!😄👍
I’ve been diagnosed with bpd for like a year and i met my fp 8months ago. I feel so lonely bc like in the french psychology they don’t even recognise what a fp is, and when i first told my therapist about it she was just like nah it’s just some shit that u made up it aint a real thing, bc it would mean every1 have some fp even ppl who are not borderline. and then she made me feel so dumb for actually thinking that ppl could relate 2 my dumb brain and the way i act so i tried to forget about it even tho i know i have a fp and that it is true. Watching this video is really helpful so thank you, i mean it.
I’ve recently come to terms with the idea that I probably have bpd, and my fiancée is my fp. I’m going to start in on therapy with a DBT specialist because I love her more than words can express, and I want our relationship to be happier and healthier. If anyone is reading this and is in the same position: I believe in you. We can do it.
That's a brave step you're taking, and I admire your commitment to improving your relationship and well-being.
Video suggestion : running towards danger and wrong decisions verses recognising you are safe and staying home ...
Making decisions in other words / connecting with the body
And video on how to love yourself
So I worked really hard on myself after my first breakup. I found things that fufill me when I'm alone and single. I worked so much on my confidence that this time the relationship would be healthier. I feel like since being in a relationship I've suddenly lost myself. Suddenly all the little things, things I was happy living without, like texts or frequent phone calls, or being complimented... suddenly those things dictate how my days ago even when I try my best to keep busy. Not sure what to do
This is saving my sanity
I do not like that this is how I am. I don’t want to be this way, I’m going through divorce number 2 ( we are trying to figure out ways to fix this) he was my person, we would look at each other and both just smile, never had love like it before. Because of the way I am it had to end. I just got diagnosed at 27 with BPD , I’ve Seen two different doctors and I’ve done therapy.
I wish people would understand I don’t try to hurt anyone. I’m saying anything the way anyone is hearing it. I can’t hear how I offend anyone. I trust Not a single person. Everyone leaves.
Venting because I really do like your videos. Thank you
Thank you again, Dr. Fox, for helping me continue to understand, and heal from my BPD. All my life I have struggled with psychiatrists, medical physicians, and therapists as FP. It’s been so painful to feel like I’m trapped in this addiction with little understanding from anyone. Your practical steps to self healing here in are a true God send. I began applying them immediately. I already feel somewhat liberated! I can’t thank you enough.
It is important to change to be a better person but it is irrelevant to change to please somebody.
Dr. Daniel Fox thank you for the education! I find your voice quite soft spoken and soothing for the ears. I e subscribed!
Very helpful. I’m rewatching like two more times 😅
My psychologist is refusing to diagnose me because i'm "just a teen" but i literally qualify for diagnosis even more closely than my aunt who IS diagnosed :///
Your videos are always useful, helpful and we are thankful that you are a doctor who understands this diorder and is committed n certified in helping those who have this. 🌟🌟🌟💯 BIG THANK YOU 💯🌟🌟🌟
+Grace LoveBird 🦊👍
Hey all. I am from Malaysia. I didn't get a valid diagnosis from any of my psychiatrists but I knew I had symptoms of bpd.
Dr. Fox you are awesome i have been help my self by watching your videos is such a help to have some guide to manage my personality i am 49 yeRs old and just a few years ago i found
About BPD thank for all your i wish I live near you and you were my therapist here in Florida arent to many BPD specialist.thank you.
What should you do when your favourite person leaves you? I'm learning a lot about myself without them but I miss them an awful lot and don't know how to cope with that part of it. Have you any advice?
S L I like to know as I have the same issue
Yes. I need this too. I don’t move on easily. I have a few favorite ppl and they are my favorite for life.
@@RachelWrites I'm usually the opposite, I move on from romantic relationships very quickly but I've realised this is really unhealthy. I'm deliberately staying single for at least a year (my fp is pretty much always my partner) to try and work on my self/ living without a 'favourite person'. It's been tough, but it has been about 6 months since me and my ex broke up and it is definitely getting easier now
@@neutrallynonsensical3477 Everyone is different. That's the thing about mental illness, you can't put anyone in a box because we all experience it differently. I hope things are better and wish you the best. :)
same
This was a wonderful video to watch..
But also...*Tina Belcher sized groan* Having fps are the wooooooorst... I NEVER WANT TO PUT MYSELF THROUGH HAVING ONE OF THOSE AGAIN!!
I SERIOUSLY NEED TO FIND AWAY TO KICK THIS HABIT🤣🤣😭😭🤣🤣
I have been the fp more than once throughout my life without realising it. To be honest it started with spending a whole childhood in which at least one if not both parents had undiagnosed forms of bpd.
This is the best video I think I've ever seen. Explains so much of my SO's behavior. Thank you!
Idk if this will
Help anyone, but I grew up in an overly religious environment. One thing I learned was if you were told to watch what you say because you’ll speak something into existence, this is damaging. My parents and grandmother told me that whenever i said something negative and tried to talk about how I feel. That means i’ve been neglecting how I feel and haven’t been accepting any negative emotions and talking through them. It sounds helpful, but it isn’t. It makes it worse. Hope this helps and brings realization.
It's important to acknowledge and work through all your emotions, both positive and negative.
Why you are such a good person and at the same time so good at expressing
I just went through the exercise of identifying what we bring to the relationship and where it becomes unhealthy. I’m seeing a lot of the unhealthy parts coming from me because I desperately want to be accepted and have certainty. I lack the patience to give things time and create pressure leaving us at this standstill where both sides shut down and it becomes uncomfortable to where he needs to leave.
That’s is very valuable insight. Use it to continue to grow and make changes. I wish you well.
you get me so well. you are so helpful!!
Thanks so much for this, this is a huge problem in my life!
Dr. Fox, can't thank you enough for this video - all of them, really! They've given me such clarity as you've explained things so easy for me to understand. I'm so glad I found you. I clicked the bell so I don't miss any of your new videos!Thank you kindly for such invaluable information!
I’m so glad you found my material helpful. Be well.
You're so welcome and thank you for your kind support of the channel. It means a lot when people help support the cause of putting out honest and research based information. Thank you and be well.
This. Is. Me!! Its been me for decades
Good insight. Be well.
I have to leave my fp and I feel like I'm dying. I feel like I have no reason to live.
I was diagnosed with dpd, but one of my most intense symptoms is fp, so idk. I watch bpd stuff because it's relatable.
I can feel u! U really want to stay but u can't take the pain anymore at the same time, u feel so stuck