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First part - I thought it was like Edward and bella Second part - a little creepy version of Edward and bella Third part - he finally entered in his real face Btw Edward and bella was reference to twilight saga
On the "are you autistic question" being offensive - it's about context. "Are you autistic because I want to understand you better and make sure you're comfortable" is very different to "are you autistic because I want to know what's wrong with you." Here it VERY much felt like the latter.
as an autistic person, i genuinely don't mind if someone asks me, but what pisses me the fuck off is intention and tone. if they're asking simply because they're curious, that's completely fine. but omfg that guy needs to go to therapy or something
Idk, sometimes their "curiosity" can come off in a weird way. One time I was talking to a guy and he *interrupts* me to ask "are you autistic?" but in a sort of, like, "I can see what you are, praise me!" kind of way, as if he was somehow so much smarter just for asking. I found it really embarrassing. It was also really frustrating that he interrupted me just to ask that question in such a mighty way. I didn't talk to him again after that.
Asking if someone's autistic isn't offensive in itself, but the guy implies that the reason she's so quiet and not into him MUST be because she's autistic
A boy in Junior High who should have been in high school was offended my 12 year old self who was just starting 6th grade wasn't fawning over him so he told everyone I was gay and I got bullied for that. Thing is I'm actually autistic. Also, I was not at the level of maturity to be a part of the dating world yet.
Because Lord knows it couldn't be his attitude or personality, or even just that they simply aren't compatible. No, he's perfect - the perfect male specimen of which all women want. There must be something wrong with her. Obviously. Edit: Upon further review, I feel like this dude ain't compatible with anyone on the planet... but what do I know? I'm just an Ace autistic woman, which clearly explains why I don't grasp how perfect he is.
While not everyone will agree with that sentiment, I do. I think asking someone a straight-up question about their mental state so that you can be more understanding is fine. I would have phrased it differently, but especially if someone is mildly on the spectrum, there might not be a better way to get this information, and it is considerate to want to be accommodating. It's kind of like asking for pronouns, imo. If I suspect someone I work with or am going to interact with frequently is non-binary or may have a pronoun preference, I'll simply ask. Some people wear a pin for their pronouns, but nobody wears an autism pin. All that said, even if I were on the spectrum, I would have been offended by the way he did this. At best, it's out of touch, and at worst, it's intentionally insulting. The biggest problem is the structure here. If you're going to ask this question for considerate reasons, you couch the question by letting them know that you're going to ask an uncomfortable question, but you feel you might have been inconsiderate up to this point, and just want to be respectful moving forward. Then you ask the question. THEN you explain your reasoning if they ask. Listing the reasons you think they're on the spectrum and then asking sets a negative tone. The first version is: "Something might be wrong with the way I've been addressing you." The second is: "Something is wrong with the way you're addressing me." That said, if someone isn't talking much and not laughing at my jokes... I'd just assume they're either reserved or that they don't find me funny. I wouldn't jump to a diagnosis. Edit :: I feel like it's necessary to add that this guy is an absolute creep.
14:30 it’s a comedic form. “He was having a full meltdown to an empty phone, that I wasn’t paying attention to because I was baking. I was having zero emotion about him. I wasn’t ignoring him. I wasn’t avoiding him. He did not exist to me. The fact he took that personally is hilarious and embarrassing for him.”
I think it was to indicate how fucking obnoxious it was. When I'm trying to watch something important and a person messages me nonstop it can get very irritating
There’s a difference between “hey, are you autistic? Just genuinely curious” and it being genuine curiosity v.s “hey, are you autistic? You act like one” and it being not openly rude. You can get the feel for which one it is based on how it’s said or just off the feel.
As an autistic individual, if someone asks me if I am autistic I am usually not offended, but it depends on the context and the tone of the person and if they meant it as an insult or not. If someone uses autistic as an insult, then goodbye, I'm leaving, I'm gonna go talk to my other autistic friends who don't insult me for being on the spectrum
I know there are varieties of autism, but I learned that most autistic people are not good at getting tones or kinda signs like that, when talking to others. (Even though many "normal" people (who's normal for real, and sry for quoting it like this, because of my lacking knowledge of words) I would like if you or others could help to fill my lack of knowledge.
@@TimHense-m5k At least for me, and some people very close to me who are also autistic- it’s not that we don’t always not see or understand tones and signals. It’s more so that we see so deeply into it, more than the average neurotypical person. We see all the different subtle tones within one tone, and all the possible meanings behind a signal, it makes it overwhelming, and so we may respond very plainly, choosing to not respond in any way that shows we took it or understood it in one specific way. I need you to be direct; I don’t like to guess, even if I’m certain on your intentions.
Definitely. I've met plenty of attractive men that I never even contemplated getting involved with. Personality is a huge factor too. They can be attractive physically, but their personality can be a total turn off, or even just not what you're looking for. Just the act of getting hit on by a cute guy shouldn't be a deciding factor for if you're willing to date them. It only opens up the possibility.
@@martibee8984 Right!! How is he missing the fact that even if OP *was* interested, that fact could change after the dude made things awkward by doing the whole "you don't like meeee" thing in front of their friends? I would get the ick so fast no matter what the person looked like lmaoo
Saying someone cute doesn't always equal "I like them" I mean maybe her way of saying hes cute is a way of her saying "he thinks his looks means he can get w/e he wants"
Being asked straight up “are you autistic” feels the same as being asked “is there a medical reason for you acting weird”. Being quiet and reserved is not weird, it's not a bad thing, and it doesnt NEED a medical or psychological reason for it. My autistic friend once went on a rant about why people think she would be all bubbly and smiles and energetic if she wasnt autistic. Who's to say she wouldn't be just as quiet but with more eye contact and more emotionnal control (her words, not mine). She isn't wrong in her frustration. When someone is neirodivergent, people assume 100% of their behavior and personnality is due to the divergence.
Finding someone cute doesn't mean you're interested in them. I've met some very attractive people in my life that I wouldn't touch if you paid me. I kind of love how chilly that girl is. He asked her what she thought about him and she said she doesn't think about him. SAVAGE. It feels like a perfect response. His questions are straight up rude because he's assuming if she doesn't engage with him, she must be neuro-spicy. Like he can't see that maybe she genuinely doesn't have anything to say to him. It doesn't read flirtatious to me, but even if you took it that way, she's not obligated to play nice with anyone. Especially not someone who clearly won't take the hint that she's disinterested.
Haha like fr! I kept thinking the same thing. Like, dude, I can say the same shyte about my brother, that most certainly doesn't mean I'm into him. It just means I am capable of recognizing that this person technically has conventionally attractive physical characteristics. Okay and? That don't mean I'm flirting with said individual. It's just context. I thought it was obvious from the beginning that she didn't want anything to do with this guy.
For real. I was kind of agreeing with her. That's probably how I would respond to be honest. I'm not interested at all and just because I say someone is cute doesn't equal attraction.
The "while trying to follow a recipe on YT" was prolly just painting the extra level of annoyance from the message spam. She's trying to use her phone in the kitchen and constantly getting interrupted by Mr Look-at-me. I'd mention that context too, I think. Adds a layer of her frustration about the experience.
I feel like the point of OP specifying what she was doing while he was blowing up her phone, was to specify that she was BUSY (following yt recipes takes a lot of focus. sometimes they talk too fast!) so even if she did want to respond, it was literally not a good time for her to. it's the fact that he's losin' it after her not responding in.03 seconds, so he goes on a rant. guys a weirdo anyway byeeee
I personally really love the image of this guy going on a rant, with the little truncated message push notifs going off and her ignoring them as she watches the video. It really paints a picture. Also he couldn't wait like what--how long are most cooking videos, even longform? Half an hour? Tops?
I was just thinking of all the times I’m watching something and a group text starts popping off. You’re constantly having to close the notifications when they’re popping in front of your video. There’s a reason some of my bigger group messages have alerts turned off
@@gambitgurlisis even if it's real complicated, or the person has a thick accent or something so you gotta watch each part 3 times, that's still only like an hour or so, perhaps 2. For all he knows she could be having a nap, and not even awake to see the messages 💀
25:45 My jaw DROPPED at the second wife shit. I literally couldn't manage to shut my mouth for a solid 10 seconds after hearing that. The sheer nerve is utterly unfathomable.
I don't understand how it's possible for people to say shit like that and not have a single cell in their brain say "hold on... what are we saying?" "don't bother with that guy he's pathetic and doing anything to get your attention" bro listen to yourself!
I've said, "he's cute," to get it across that someone isn't used to rejection, with absolutely zero interest in getting with them and actively wanting to avoid them because they made me feel like this.
genuine question, how does "he's cute" translate into all of that? im autistic, i dont get it. to me when someone says "he's cute" it just means what it says on the tin. why not just say "he isnt used to rejection" or something?
@@YourPalKindred I think it the "cute" could be used as in "aww, he's cute and naive, little baby is not used to rejection". This is just my guess but cute can be used to describe someone as naive/childish. And it would not be as a compliment then
@@YourPalKindred He's cute, so he's not used to rejection. He's physically attractive and therefore is used to getting attention from women, and when a woman suddenly doesn't give him attention, he thinks that something must be wrong with her.
@@ZiggaMauit has a similar meaning to calling someone stone-faced. An expression can be described as ‘stony’ right? It’ll mean different things in different context, but its the equivalent to someone having a blank/unimpressed facial expression in response to something
@@AnEmu404 thank you ❤️ I've seen the heads popping up in posts recently and that's what I was thinking they were but sometimes I'm way off on things like that 😂
She mentioned that she was following a recipe online to imply how unbothered she was. He was obsessing over her responses for multiple days and decided to send a long unhinged message to her meanwhile she was doing something innocuous. There was nothing odd about anything she said. She simply isn’t interested in him and she’s basically calling him insecure without explicitly saying it. She also can observe that he is physically attractive without being interested in dating him at all.
The way I took it is when I’m watching UA-cam and I get spammed with texts, the volume gets lower to make the notification sound so then I have to keep skipping back and it gets really annoying
So true! The best looking guy in my freshmen year of high school was a complete PoS and huge douchebag. He was hot on the outside, but week-old roadkill on the inside.
Yeah that's true, she is just making the point of uninvestment across. But what I feel is that she actively tried to transmit that dissinterest very actively right from the start and I think that is what pushed him to a defensive mode and started demeaning her in order to null her opinion of him being uninteresting. Simultaniously I think this guy hasn't properly experienced rejection and is going way overboard on the insults. He completely lost me there. But I don't think she was nice at any point either
Yeah I agree I took it as a point of clarification. Like, it’s not like she was purposely ignoring him and that he should be offended. But more so she was doing something and it would’ve been hard to respond but she kept seeing the texts and it would’ve been really uncomfortable to get spammed.
"Weird" is definitely the wrong word for the first story. That's super messed up, an abuse of power, completely inappropriate, almost illegal, and frankly that boyfriend sucks; I'd dump him for only saying "that sounds like him". Clearly there's a lack of respect there; that girl is genuinely in danger from that dad and I hope she gets out of that situation and that relationship ASAP.
There are few red flags bigger than being passive when a family member behaves inappropriately towards your partner. That situation will only go downhill and she needs to cut and run. Just giving out your gf's number without her permission is bad, but giving it specifically to a family member you know is a creep? Abhorrent.
it's more likely that he know's no matter what he does or says his dad won't stop, as he said it's happened repeatedly, so he's given up trying. It's also possible he could face very dangerous reprocussions from his dad if he didn't give her number to him (he still should have given the gf a heads-up tho). Not everything is black and white and are you surprised someone so vile wouldn't also be vile to his own child?
Imo op seems like the kind of girl who likes to keep a safe distance from guys they don’t trust and maintained a healthy disinterest in her communication to promote that distance. I think the note about her following a recipe on yt was to indicate that she is happily and peacefully going about her life/interests in contrast to the madness happening in the messages she’s not even paying attention to.
@@malisaurus2367 Agreed 100%. I did not find it weird to say that she was watching a thing on YT. Just explaining that she was in the middle of something and didn't check her phone but wasn't purposely ignoring crazy dude (she didn't know yet how crazy he was).
Exactly this! And exactly as @@MangoPanic said! It was just an observation that would help explain why he feels so butthurt that OP wasn’t giving him the attention he expected to get.
Right out the gate with excessive text guy I was seeing red flags tbh. As someone who’s quiet and just trying to mind my ps and qs like this girl, I did not sense any flirting on her end at all, as if I were to say “I don’t think about you” that would be hint number one to fuck off. It’s not even subtle! Girl said “I’m not interested” and the guy thought it was a good time to bring up the idea of being a daddy like wtf. Leave her alone
THANK YOU. The absolute entitlement he has for her attention and the aggression leading up to that tantrum was wild. It does matter if she's autistic or not. If she's not showing interest in you LEAVE HER ALONE instead of begging her to like you? He's unhinged and needs therapy. He can't handle that someone he likes doesn't like him. It's so embarrassing.
I looked up this crazy case on Reddit, apparently the guy stalked her, came to her house multiple times, left her a gift with a creepy message, showed up at her spin class, plus some more insane texts. She contacted the police, who said they can't do anything until he breaks the law (surprise surprise), so basically she's on her own. Some large UA-camrs reviewed the posts like Daniel did now which gave her even more headaches and attention. So basically this girl is on her own while the insane man is stalking her and no-one is doing anything about it. She's in massive danger
"Cute" is a compliment when you're in school. When you're an adult, calling a guy "cute" is more patronizing or friendzone-ish than complimentary. OR, strange to explain, you can say someone is cute or even attractive without wanting to hook up with them.
That “sounds like him” is so scary because if he’s 19 and THIS used to his dad hitting on his girlfriends, he was probably hearing about this way before he was 18
I'm autistic and I think I would be a little offended if someone flat out asked me 'are you autistic', since that means they're looking at me through the lens of a stereotype
@@RedRum013 wait he clearly meant it as an insult? im also autistic i thought he was just asking genuinely 😭 (ive only seen the first conversation tho) EDIT: watched the second conversation. ew
Happened to me once in person. Don't know if he was too, and just wanted to ask me to see if we had something in common, but it wasn't fun because I didn't know this guy well and he wasn't nice to most people, so I just took it as him saying "I see you're acting weirdy and need to see if I'm right."
There are two kinds of people who ask me “are you autistic” Neurodivergent people who have clocked me and are very blunt, as many of us are. Or people who are trying to make me feel insecure and insult me for being weird and then very awkwardly start sweating when I say “yes, I am actually” with a smile. The sounds like the second.
I'm neurodivergent and can definitely spot things I recognize in other people and I was reading this girl's messages and honestly agreeing with him, she does seem neurodivergent to me lol I wouldn't outright ask someone in case they're insecure about it but I would definitely be assuming it atp.
I was thinking similarly, that the only people who’d ask like that are those that can recognize autism symptoms as autism symptoms and doesn’t just blindly stigmatize it or someone who sees autism as an insult and is asking rhetorically as a way of saying “you’re a freaky weirdo and should stop acting the way you act.” Most allistic people can recognize when someone’s different, but instead of making the connection “oh, they might have a different neurotype” they instead just see the person as different and equate that as being wrong, this is why a lot of people who claim to be supportive of autistic people will still be extremely ableist and unaccepting to anyone who shows autistic traits, even if they know someone is autistic they will still have no tolerance for them displaying traits of it. My mother watched corny autism shows like Atypical and The Good Doctor because I’m diagnosed autistic and yet she would still be upset at me for displaying even the most basic of autism symptoms like the characters in those shows.
I have AuDHD & I actually don’t think she’s autistic based off of her texts and her behavior that the roach described. I have a passionate dislike for arrogent men and I think that was her case. Like maybe she sensed that about him from the start and thus couldn’t bother to entertain him by laughing at his jokes (that probably weren’t even funny but people will laugh at someone’s bad jokes if that person is attractive enough) and being friendly with him. I experienced a weird older colleague of mine (when I was 18 and he was 26 😀) making it desperately obvious that he was into me so I started avoiding him and having as minimal contact as possible. Because I was trying to avoid the awkward situation of him confessing to me and he creeped me out. I imagine It’s not easy to limit contact with someone when he’s part of your friendgroup. So I’m assuming here that she actually wasn’t that fond of him from the beginning and is leaving that out to make the first texts of the series seem more sensational. But yeah I’m kinda judging based off my own experiences so it’s just a crazy theory. BTW at first I thought the texts were entirely fabricated since his creepy desperation was like a toxic character straight out of some cringy wattpad story 🤠 Like seriously who talks like that?
Lmao I once had a teacher assign the class something (it was a kinda new topic) and he came over to my desk to see what I had done so far and he said “whatever (my name) is taking, you all need to be taking it too” to the rest of the class. I straight up said “Adderall. I’m on adderall.” With a perfectly straight face. And he sputtered out “then I guess everyone else needs adderall”
She is not engaging he is trying to be friendly he's trying to be funny he's trying to have a conversation and she's just not interested. And there's something really weird about a guy who assumes that if she isn't engaging with him then there is something wrong with HER.
I agree, I think he is ironically getting "neged" by the girl. Not intentionally but the result is the same. He is so sure he's hot shit that any chink in that ego armor is like a dam breaking. "Well, if this girl I find value in because I'm attracted to her doesn't love me that means I may not be perfect which is impossible." Look, I was a broken little emotionally abused boy when I first started dating at the end of high school. I had no clue how to respond (this was the pre-internet era) when I was rejected. It hurts so your initial response is to be nasty back, depending on how you're rejected, obviously. I would often take girls literally when they would say, "No, sorry, I have to go to the store later." when I would ask them out and say, "Well, I can go with you!" and... not get it. They were trying to be nice and I was being a clingy idiot. I don't think I ever responded to anything as harshly or horribly as this dude did, save for a long-term relationship that ended with the girl cheating and ghosting me. That was me having hurt, anger, frustration, and pain without a place to put it and just talking horribly to her. I apologized to her years later and she forgave me, thankfully. This dude, though, needs to learn real quick that disinterest is almost always an answer by itself. If it's ambiguous, or you're not certain and weren't given a hard, "No." I think it's reasonable to try again later or something but be mindful that anything but a "yes" is a "no".
The recipe thing made perfect sense to me. She’s clarifying that he was bugging the shit out of her and won’t just leave her alone to prepare her food. That dude has a massive ego and kudos to OP for putting him in his place.
Narc guy went full stalker. I think in the end she got a restraining order against him. He tried to turn the friend group against her, but she showed them his texts, and solved the problem. He might be attractive physically, but he's lacking in every other department. Also, stating that someone is cute doesn't mean you def want to date them. You could simply be making an observational statement. I've even said people I couldn't stand are good looking because it was the truth. She may have actually thought he was cute enough to give him a chance if he had acted differently.
@@Imreallyboredsick if I'm remembering correctly, he didn't give her a choice. He even started leaving gifts at her door. I was concerned for her too. I've been in those situations. They're scary.
ok i'm autistic and 1. i would be pissed if someone felt entitled to know my disability status without knowing them well but also 2. he kinda ate with the 'into some trains or shit'. like i hate this man but damn that did make me laugh edit - i also think the way he asked if she was autistic is rude! i think a good rule of thumb is if an autistic person wants to tell you about their neurodivergence it's their choice - they don't owe you anything. but if you're going to ask someone if they're autistic you need a better reason than "my masculine charms do not work on this woman - alas, she must be autistic :(". and you also need more grace and tact when asking lmao
Honestly, I don't think he was trying to be funny. I think he was being dead serious in a derogatory way, so it's great that it turned out more ridiculous and funny than the insult he was going for.
Asking someone straight up “are you autistic?” Because they arent reacting to your jokes or flirts is kinda out of line, in my autistic opinion, i would be weirded out and yeah maybe a little offended because my disinterest in someone doesnt mean im autistic, it means im not interested. He thinks there must be something “wrong” with her because of her not playing into his games
Honestly yeah I feel bad at laughing at the train bit, it was funny! But again his whole crazy rant just I couldn't take seriously in the first place what a clown
Ok, Daniel. You can think someone is cute without wanting to pursue them. This guy is in her friend group. He's not HER friend. She doesn't really know him, and while she doesn't (or didn't) dislike him, she didn't have any particular interest in getting to know him either. He made a joke at her expense in front of her friends earlier that day, so obviously she's not gonna be wanting to have a casual chat with him. He came in with accusatory language, like she needs an excuse to not be interested. Her language was dismissive because she was trying to dismiss him. Then he crossed the line.
I don’t think he embarrassed her in front of the friend group at the dinner, he is so clearly flirting with her it’s kind of annoying that she is (what seems like) pretending not to get it. That type of open banter among friends is so textbook for confident and typical guy flirting that I would put it in my “top 5 signs a guy likes you” I mean, come on. For her to engage him and keep the convo going, asking open ended questions and making jokes, using emoji and lols and lmaos just to take screenshots of the conversation and share them with everyone (so she doesn’t mind dragging her business out in front of friends) including people who have slept with him (considering she said it was to all the girls in the group and later says he has slept with two of the girls in the group) feels very antagonistic, very drama-inducing, and mean girl behavior. Her showing and discussing his texts with friends and strangers (and this is before they became unhinged) feels like a power move first over her female friends that have slept with him (I imagine that stung to see a guy you like explicitly pursuing a friend) and then over him when she shares them openly online and invites strangers to mock him for liking her. She’s playing games with him and humiliating him, spending significant time and energy discussing him with others yet denying him the dignity of an actual real and honest reply to him directly until giving her numbered list. She’s not too busy, she’s stirring up shit and making herself the center of attention and now she’s got a real genuine “crazy” “stalker” she can feel superior to. Her being autistic is the only explanation for her being what is, in neurotypicals, deliberately obtuse and rude. If she were autistic it would make sense, as a neurodivergent I would be relieved that someone understood my strangeness for what it was and at least was checking in on potential alternatives before misinterpreting my actions to be flirtatious. He gave her every opportunity to clarify her feelings about him asking her directly and getting confusing replies that could have been kinder and clearer. He asked _her_ about her behavior. She toyed with him and then used his attempt at communication to get him ostracized from the group. Again, all is not well that ends well. This, minus the updates where he unravels, is a public flogging of a simple yet immature attempt at flirting and an eventual unravelling of an unhealthy mind. Treating normal “cute and chill” people this way would be mean and unnecessary, but I think she got what she wanted out of this. It’s pretty wild that I sympathize even a little bit with such an obviously trash dude, but really I just feel bad for everyone who doesn’t have their own delusions of grandeur to fall back on when interacting with this lady. Also I’m genuinely relieved to hear that gen z are actively engaging in group activities and hanging out in person! The news makes us think they never leave the house or get laid so that’s giving me hope, truly.
You’d be surprised how many people like that exist, similar with me and my coworker, I wasn’t talkative towards anymore, I really don’t talk unless you come up to me and want to discuss something or if I feel the need to talk. But I guess for him it made him think I didn’t like him, he literally eventually asked me if I didn’t like him and I explained I just don’t talk much, and I guess my choice of words did seem a bit off but I mentioned “I didn’t like you or dislike you”, but more in a “I don’t know you so I don’t really have an opinion on you” answer but I think that just made him confirm I didn’t like him. 💀 No hard feelings though but it started making me feel bad cuz I didn’t want him to think I just hated him for no reason. It’s really just a personality thing, cuz it’s not only him but a lot of outgoing people I’ve interacted with, just if you don’t talk to them you’re the odd one..
@@rainbomgWHAT? i’ve never been in a relationship and i tend to think people are kinder (or meaner) than they are, so feel free to disregard this, but he’s not flirting (yes he is, unfortunately). like another comment said, this is very much “are you autistic, because i want to fix you/figure out what’s wrong with you” instead of any genuine curiosity. she’s not toying with him. she’s just discussing something weird (and gross) that happend to her, no names or pictures. even if he was flirting, what guy flirts via humiliating a girl in front of her friends? she’s not some master manipulator like you’re painting her to be. especially with his one-sided rant, he is definitely going down the “what’s wrong with you, let me fix you” route. also “minus the updates where he unravels”? that’s more than half of the story. sorry if i come off as rude. if i missed some things, i’m sorry.
@@PPBbunno As a man myself, I can agree that his joke was probably offensive to her, but with that said, most men would laugh at a joke that may or may not be offensive to women. That's simply how men joke with one another. Something that may hurt someone's feelings is usually interpreted by men has a joke, especially when they're friends. The tone of the person's voice when they say something or how they act after they say it, can distinguish it between bullying and joking for men. Of course, women probably don't realize this, thus that mistake is easy to explain. Now, everything after that is inexcusable and he should be locked away forever because he's clearly batsh** insane.
You know it's bad when I did not question it at all when he said, "I'm just gonna scratch my butt real quick." These surprise microphones are getting scarily good.
nononononono, most guys think a girl is 10000% in love with them if they are called cute by a girl, doesn't matter what context or intent. guys are just dumb
@@JarmezGDI would say it is relevant, because if he's attractive it kind of makes sense how he's this insane and thinking he's owed her attention because he gets female attention because he's attractive
I have high functioning autism, which mostly manifests itself as just making me not talk, and while I don’t think asking someone (jokingly) if their autistic isn’t offensive, if someone asked me in full seriousness “Are you on the spectrum” in itself wouldn’t piss me off if a close friend asked me that, but if someone I barely know, (let alone someone this weird) asked, I’d have their ass for it.
17:35 As an Autistic ADHDer, yes. It was incredibly offensive for that guy to have asked in that moment. Asking the question itself is not the offensive part, it’s the fact that the question was completely unprompted. Personally, I have asked people if they’re autistic, usually because I’m curious to know since I recognize the signs in that person due to my own experiences. But it’s not like I ask the question completely unprompted. I usually only end up asking when we’re talking about neurodivergence and other similar topics that can lead to the question. Asking under the context that he did was incredibly rude and disrespectful.
i feel like its also different when it's a neurodivergent person asking if someone else is neurodivergent, because most of the time it's us looking for community and connection, and trying to make friends with other neurodivergent people
Just because she said he was cute on reddit doesnt mean she is interested in him lol She very clearly has zero interest in him but he keeps pestering her. Her describing him to reddit as cute is not a green light for him to say any of the things he said to her. I feel like this is obvious
Real. In no way did I see her initial conversation flirty but blunt and disinterested. I would be put off too if he tried starting drama about her not liking him then texting later & accusing her of being autistic in a very rude way. The fact he kept pushing set off so many red flags but it’s ok since he’s such a “good guy” 🤢
@@LeanAndMean44nah I don’t think there was any flirtation at all. She said he’s “cute and chill” as a way to let reddit know that the guy seemed OK at first, which is why she was even talking to him in the first place. Same way someone would start a conversation with, “Yeah, she was shy and nice.” without actually being close or caring about the person they were talking about. It’s just a little description. Doesn’t mean she’s into him, just another way of saying she didn’t expect him to be such a dimwit since he seemed chill at first.
@@SmeltingSmoresright???? women be replying dudes' wall of texts with one single word, and somehow they still think there's flirting in the girl's part like??????? lol
Someone who's not autistic someone asked me with like so much genuineness.... it still got to me. Not because autism is icky but because someone found me so different they couldn't really imagine that I had the same brain chemistry as them. I do have adhd I found out some time after but it still hurt for someone who always tried to find my crowd and fit in. Also I think some people are cute, doesn't make me want to date them.
'You've been single all this time, it's extremely suspicious' Ok, so, that's just fucking creepy that he kept tabs on that the entire time. I didn't end up in another relationship for 10 years after my previous one fell apart and in part it was likely because of who I am as a person (demisexuality is the short of it) so he'd likely consider that suspicious too. That guy sounds like a goddamn stalker, holy fuck... EDIT: OH MY FUCKING GOD, IT GOT EVEN WORSE! HOW?!
Literally this - I have been accused several times of being gay by a friend I've known for a year, just because they can't fathom that I've been too busy for a relationship and have standards. It's wild. Also, this guy is completely freaking nuts.
I'm autistic and I don't think it's outright offensive to ask if someone is on the spectrum. It's not bad to be autistic. That being said, this guy was absolutely doing it in a condescending and seemingly ableist way. He couldn't rationalise why OP didn't like him and from how he describes them "liking trains", he probably doesn't have the best view on autistic people.
It seemed like she mentioned him being “kinda cute” and their friend group being evenly split between genders because her friends (and him) are expecting her to be interested and start dating him. Her noting him being “kinda cute” and listing all of the personality traits she doesn’t like is probably a repeat of something she told her friends when they asked why she wasn’t interested and she wanted to say something nice about him before rejecting the idea.
I’m autistic (late diagnosed as it’s the case with most autistic women) and that really depends. But if someone asked me if I’m autistic because I don’t respond to them hitting on me, I think it’s really offensive because the question implies that there is something wrong with me for not being receptive to their flirting. If I’m with other autistic friends and someone asks me if I’m autistic as well, it’s ok. There is nothing wrong with being autistic and I’m not ashamed of it. It’s people’s perception of the disability that’s wrong, people like this guy in the story. As a general rule of thumb, don’t ask people if they are autistic when they don’t perform social rules the way you expect them to. There are tons of other explanations as to why people might act the way they do without putting it on autism.
20:28 The thing is, Daniel, that you can refer to someone as cute, find them attractive and still not want to date them. Not even just because of how they act, but because of NUMEROUS REASONS. Just because someone says you're attractive doesn't mean they want to date. Just because she said he's cute doesn't mean she's obligated to try to date him when she clearly doesn't want that. You were SERIOUSLY tripping taking his side, my dude. Like, really, I found several dudes in my high school class physically cute, but their personalities made them entirely unattractive and even a cute face couldn't fix that. Being rude to someone is such a huge turn off, especially when they are being rude to you personally. This man literally started out the conversation rude as hell and you stretched to your LIMITS giving him the benefit of the doubt, all way until he said something so crazy that even you couldn't defend it anymore. Maybe listen to both sides before you just assume? And yeah no, if you think someone is autistic and you want to know, do NOT ask them what's "wrong" with them, because that's just inherently messed up. On top of that, even if I WAS autistic, I would be super offended at someone directly asking me like it's any of their business or right to know. If someone out and says they are autistic, fine, good, great even! But if you're just wondering and they've never said anything about it, don't just assume.
But its more fun to watch h him change his mind half way through because on a first read that what you mught think otherwise id listrn to the ai voices
I hope that woman is safe. Men like that are the reason I would 100% choose to be lost in the woods with a random bear than a random human man... Best case scenario, he's narcissistic pseudo stalker. Worst case, he'll flat out assault a woman, possibly even kill her. Big yikes, I really hope he left OP alone and that she's safe.
There’s a more recent comment on this video saying that a more recent Reddit update said that he did start stalking her and she went to the police but they wouldn’t do anything. So yea I hope she’s safe too :(
It definitely definitely hurts me when someone I do not have a huge level of trust with goes and asks me if I’m autistic. Because when I’m asked that, it usually means I’ve done something unusual and they are either deciding to scrutinize me or give me a pass.
I'm autistic and woah that guy is ableist. I think he doesn't know what autism is outside of the context of schoolyard insults. I've been asked if I'm autistic both as an insult and as a genuine question, and he definitely meant that as an insult. I'm personally usually okay with it as a genuine question, but different autistic people have different preferences. I'm never okay with being asked it as an insult, for obvious reasons.
I don't think it had anything to do with his feelings towards autistic people tbh. It was only to do with the fact that she wasn't interested in him. (Not defending the guy, he's a cunt)
19:28 lmao right after this line "You make me want to become a daddy." I got an ad that started out just screaming and I thought Daniel played it as a reaction clip and I was just like "a little overdramatic, but fair".
I'm on the spectrum with some other issues that aren't relevant rn, and I'm super emotionally sensitive not just with my emotions, but with other people's too. I grew up under narcissistic abuse, and verbal and mental warfare type, and due to that, I am extremely good at sensing and noticing people's intentions and emotions, how they speak, etc. I think that guy from the quiet story is intimidated by the fact that OP is one of the very few who saw past his exterior and felt his rotten inside. He's wondering why his trick didn't work this time.
Hi, I’m on the spectrum and I just wanted to say that for me personally, it’s not very insulting if you quietly assume I’m autistic; (though for me you shouldn’t ask, I should be the one to tell you if I feel like it and am comfortable enough to tell you), but the tone is what matters the most and the guy in message at 17:20 was very condescending and rude, and was throwing up dozens of red flags. Especially the comment about the trains, yes it is a stereotype that is sometimes true, but it can be hurtful to assume that just because you think someone could be on the spectrum means they like trains; and that’s just an example.
I accidentally stopped at when it said RIP on screen at 0:17 and it looked as if it was a memorial but Daniels family gave the people making the memorial a horrible picture for it.
Dog, that "getting a bunch of texts while trying to watch a recipe on youtube" made me genuinely so mad Getting a message that takes up the screen or distracts me when I'm ACTIVELY TRYING TO LEARN FROM THE VIDEO JUST 😤😤
I’m autistic. Personally I’d be unhappy if someone just straight up asked if I was autistic. I’ll volunteer that info if I think it’s relevant but just to asked like that? No.
That makes sense I saw a different video covering this story and that comment section said for the most part"the question itself out of the blue wouldn't bother me. In fact, it's appreciated!!" I remember being really confused by that comment section
Same. I don't mind if people ask me. But it's only really if they pick up on my neurodivergent habits. If, however, someone were to ask me the question as we meet for the very first time, that's when I would be uncomfortable. It's obviously an outlandish scenario, but that's typically how I will compare the differences in approach
24:56 and the fact that he didn’t even get rejected rejected 😭 he just started tweaking out on his own 😭😭😭 homegirl was just vibing and he made up a whole fanfic in his head, got mad when she didnt follow along, then went crazy when she didnt try to coddle him after he snapped at her for not understanding what the deal was (bcs to her there was no deal ???) which made him snap again and act like a total creep…. so she blocked him… and he decided she must not understand whats going on ……..
I've actually experienced this! I was at a bookstore buying some stuff, and when I got to the front to purchase my things, the clerk at the front (maybe in her mid-20s) asked "Hey, weird question, but are you on the spectrum?" I was so dumbfounded by the comment that I asked, "uh...the gay one?" Luckily there was no harm done and she explained she has a sort of sense for these things, but it was definitely a weird thing to ask someone who was just buying some DnD books.
JESUS that guy in OP's friend group is unhinged as hell. incredibly self-obsessed and kind of scary?? he's way too obsessed with her and she should get a restraining order against him or something. yiiiiikes
As an Autistic woman the "What's your deal?" had me laughing so hard because I get that all the time. In this context, the autism question wasn't being asked because he cared but because he wanted a reason to write off her disinterest in him it seems. It's not offensive to me if someone is just trying to understand more about me, but no one who cares has ever just dropped that question mid conversation either. Unfortunately I know a lot of guys who are being led this direction by the incel culture garbage being posted everywhere
The guy asking the girl if she’s autistic is acting like creepy dude. Even without that question, a response stating she doesn’t think about him is just honest and straightforward. Stating how awesome he thinks he is and how much better he is than other dudes is a big red creeper flag. Dude shoulda just dropped it. Some people just have trouble finding the words to engage in conversations and some people just don’t laugh a lot, at anything. Taking it so personally, so quickly says a lot about that guy.
I'm autistic and I only get offended if neurotypical people ask me that, because for me 100% of the time a neurotypical person asks if I'm on the spectrum they have meant it in a really mean way
'i know a few of you are with autism' make me laugh so hard, I don't know why. But yes as an autistic person I'd probably get annoyed at this dude just straight up asking as a way to suss out why I won't flirt back
I have never sent unsolicited pics to any girl ever, but whenever any girl I know recieve one, I always give them the same suggestion. Send the same picture to any and all female family members and inform them of the original sender. It usually stops the interaction rather quickly.
12:32 him saying wow to her being obviously put off by how he asked and spoke about and to her is funny. She seems standoffish bc I assume they've hung out and he's tried to flirt and she didn't want it. Like genuinely she doesn't care about him that way she said he was cute bc she isn't blind you don't have to always date who you find cute.
Am autistic. Personally I think the worse part of it is that they barely talk and he just flat out asks her, implying that she has to be autistic for not being interested in him? Which is gross, and he continues to be weird and gross toward her for just...not being interested in him? Mans needs an ego check
Ugh…the number of times someone has gotten offended because I’m quiet….usually this comes from people who display a lot of extroversion, but are also in need of validation. They can’t sit with the idea that not everyone can or wants to feed their ego or reassure them. Often by having a problem with it instead of enjoying the person for who they are only makes the situation worse because you’re wasting energy trying to change someone AND communicating that you think they’re defective as a person. The best and closest people to me have never gotten on my case for not saying as much and eventually I felt comfortable enough to open up. I am certainly for quiet people trying harder to reach out and make conversation, and it’s fair for others to wish they could get closer and understand a quiet person, but I think people like this guy are walking red flags because that desire turns into rude behavior. It’s about him and winning someone over rather than enjoying who they are in that moment and letting them decide when they’re ready. I don’t have autism, but I have experienced this kind of crap. The person pushing me NEVER gets into my circle. Whether OP has autism or not, this nonsense happens to others with quiet personalities as well.
Yeah, I absolutely get where you're coming from. I was thinking along the same lines, although I'm the outgoing one. However, I married the quiet one, and getting closer to him and seeing him open up was a treasure!
Being asked if I'm autistic is fine. Being asked that when the person is clearly just telling me I'm weird, no thank you. Ignorance, stereotyping, and bad intentions are easy to see.
You can still think someone is cute but, not want to date them. That guy just made me want to puke. I can’t stand arrogant people who don’t get why they’re not attracting everyone. God, I’m so enraged by that. Some people are just stand offish and she had good reason to be. Maybe she heard stories from her friends about him and that’s why she wasn’t feeding into his arrogance. I don’t know. But she did do a great job setting boundaries. Btw. The emoji was an Easter Island head not Stonehenge.
😊 The story at 10:57.She's not saying that he's cute like she likes him.She is saying it more like he's attractive to look at.She recognizes that he's attractive but she has no romantic feelings for him.
I will say in regards to don't engage, if you think you have a stalking case, you HAVE TO express very clearly that you do not want contact. Legally it can't be considered stalking unless you have expressed explicitly that you do not want them to contact you. If you have done that and they keep contacting you, then you have a stalking case.
I'd never be offended if someone asked me if I was autistic? Being offended implies that I'm being accused of something I would be displeased to be found to be..... 🧐
8:08 This hit way too close to home. There's a dude (my best friend's ex boyfriend) who I used to be friends with until he started threatening my life, my friend's life, my friend's family's life, his own life, and schools. When we tried to cut him off, he kept finding ways to reach us. He would create new accounts, find us on other social platforms, and even manipulate people my friend and I were close to into asking us about him (we told those friends afterward who he was and they blocked him). Guys like this are creeps, but unfortunately there is no solid strategy to get rid of them. I've had to resort to abandoning all those old accounts and letting him think I died (my last messages to him were about the hospital before I blocked him). Like he's genuinely scary enough to warrent that 😭
As an autistic person, I’m okay with people asking in the right context. “Are you autistic (because knowing that would help me understand you better)?” or even “are you autistic (because I’m genuinely curious)?” are fine, but “are you autistic (as an insult)?” is gross.
I’ve had an ex-friend call me a narcissist before and it seriously made me self conscious and wonder if that was actually the case… this dude helps me realize I’m nothing like that and that my friend is projecting 😂
As someone who is visibly autistic, it would definitely not offend me if it was just "are you autistic". If I do ask someone else if they're autistic, I do not just unprompted say "are you autistic?" though. Usually, I'll say "I've noticed you do x and x and x, and that x and x and x seem to bother you a lot." Then, "Are you neurodivergent, by any chance?" and then "Do you think you might be autistic?"
I think they mean high functioning which is alot more obvious I guess! But that's just me, usually signs that are obvious are like [unable to control the volume of your voice, obsessively talking about one thing, shy or reserved at first and bad at conversations with others, mannerisms like touching or picking at yourself] but everyone's experience is different!^^@@catlover.triangleheadprod4887
@@madness_maniai feel like low needs autistic people are harder to clock than high needs autistic people tho, at least that's the general concensus of society and why many low needs autistic ppl go undiagnosed for so long. low needs autistic people are usually high masking
@madness_mania Isn't that "Low functioning"? I thought the term came from the concept that if you're unable to hide it, you're not good at functioning in society.
I HATE THIS MAN. u know which man i’m talking about. daniel, i think you’re right in saying it’s his weird insecure way of hitting on this girl, im so glad she’s standing her ground the whole time
Hey boo thang. Just popping in to say that you can go to piavpn.com/Thrasher to get 83% off Private Internet Access with 4 months free! Lemme know what shows you watch with a VPN 👀 I'm curious and looking for something new
Gosh darnit, i wish it would've been 84%
you suck daniel ☹️
Are VPNs worth it? I keep hearing about them, but I haven't tried one out yet.
porn
Harry Potter on Japanese Netflix! 👀
First part - I thought it was like Edward and bella
Second part - a little creepy version of Edward and bella
Third part - he finally entered in his real face
Btw Edward and bella was reference to twilight saga
On the "are you autistic question" being offensive - it's about context. "Are you autistic because I want to understand you better and make sure you're comfortable" is very different to "are you autistic because I want to know what's wrong with you." Here it VERY much felt like the latter.
I 100% agree. Also i think it’s different if the person asking is neurodivergent themself.
THIS!!!
Yes. Absolutely. Context and tone are key factors into whether you could offend an autistic person with that question
Or if they ask it like an insult (“are you stupid?” Kinda way)
It didn't feel like that to me but I'm not super socially adept
as an autistic person, i genuinely don't mind if someone asks me, but what pisses me the fuck off is intention and tone. if they're asking simply because they're curious, that's completely fine.
but omfg that guy needs to go to therapy or something
NVM OMFG I WATCHED FURTHER AND HE NEEDS TO GO TO JAIL
Yuuuuuuuup same, nothings wrong with asking if it's a question not a JUST BEING RUDE SORTA ALMOST A QUESTION
lol i love the replies as another autistic person, but yeah... i cannot say what i wanted to say due to me being less than the age of 18
Idk, sometimes their "curiosity" can come off in a weird way. One time I was talking to a guy and he *interrupts* me to ask "are you autistic?" but in a sort of, like, "I can see what you are, praise me!" kind of way, as if he was somehow so much smarter just for asking. I found it really embarrassing. It was also really frustrating that he interrupted me just to ask that question in such a mighty way. I didn't talk to him again after that.
as an autistic person, i 100% agree
Asking if someone's autistic isn't offensive in itself, but the guy implies that the reason she's so quiet and not into him MUST be because she's autistic
Exactly this
A boy in Junior High who should have been in high school was offended my 12 year old self who was just starting 6th grade wasn't fawning over him so he told everyone I was gay and I got bullied for that. Thing is I'm actually autistic. Also, I was not at the level of maturity to be a part of the dating world yet.
Because Lord knows it couldn't be his attitude or personality, or even just that they simply aren't compatible. No, he's perfect - the perfect male specimen of which all women want. There must be something wrong with her. Obviously.
Edit: Upon further review, I feel like this dude ain't compatible with anyone on the planet... but what do I know? I'm just an Ace autistic woman, which clearly explains why I don't grasp how perfect he is.
While not everyone will agree with that sentiment, I do. I think asking someone a straight-up question about their mental state so that you can be more understanding is fine. I would have phrased it differently, but especially if someone is mildly on the spectrum, there might not be a better way to get this information, and it is considerate to want to be accommodating. It's kind of like asking for pronouns, imo. If I suspect someone I work with or am going to interact with frequently is non-binary or may have a pronoun preference, I'll simply ask. Some people wear a pin for their pronouns, but nobody wears an autism pin.
All that said, even if I were on the spectrum, I would have been offended by the way he did this. At best, it's out of touch, and at worst, it's intentionally insulting. The biggest problem is the structure here. If you're going to ask this question for considerate reasons, you couch the question by letting them know that you're going to ask an uncomfortable question, but you feel you might have been inconsiderate up to this point, and just want to be respectful moving forward. Then you ask the question. THEN you explain your reasoning if they ask. Listing the reasons you think they're on the spectrum and then asking sets a negative tone. The first version is: "Something might be wrong with the way I've been addressing you." The second is: "Something is wrong with the way you're addressing me."
That said, if someone isn't talking much and not laughing at my jokes... I'd just assume they're either reserved or that they don't find me funny. I wouldn't jump to a diagnosis.
Edit :: I feel like it's necessary to add that this guy is an absolute creep.
@@TacoBelle100FR he thinks he's GASTON or some shit
14:30 it’s a comedic form. “He was having a full meltdown to an empty phone, that I wasn’t paying attention to because I was baking. I was having zero emotion about him. I wasn’t ignoring him. I wasn’t avoiding him. He did not exist to me. The fact he took that personally is hilarious and embarrassing for him.”
Exactly
I think it was to indicate how fucking obnoxious it was. When I'm trying to watch something important and a person messages me nonstop it can get very irritating
There’s a difference between “hey, are you autistic? Just genuinely curious” and it being genuine curiosity v.s “hey, are you autistic? You act like one” and it being not openly rude. You can get the feel for which one it is based on how it’s said or just off the feel.
"Are you autistic??"
And they say romance is dead
GOLD
my ovaries are dead after reading that conversation
"Hey girl, are you autistic because I'm the glasses kid from Polar Express and I want to talk about trains all day and night with you"
@@pieceofshoot YIKES THAT WAS COLD-
This comment is the best one
As an autistic individual, if someone asks me if I am autistic I am usually not offended, but it depends on the context and the tone of the person and if they meant it as an insult or not. If someone uses autistic as an insult, then goodbye, I'm leaving, I'm gonna go talk to my other autistic friends who don't insult me for being on the spectrum
My autistic partner agrees with this sentiment.
Exactly, context matters, and the context here definitely makes it offensive
This
I know there are varieties of autism, but I learned that most autistic people are not good at getting tones or kinda signs like that, when talking to others. (Even though many "normal" people (who's normal for real, and sry for quoting it like this, because of my lacking knowledge of words) I would like if you or others could help to fill my lack of knowledge.
@@TimHense-m5k At least for me, and some people very close to me who are also autistic- it’s not that we don’t always not see or understand tones and signals. It’s more so that we see so deeply into it, more than the average neurotypical person. We see all the different subtle tones within one tone, and all the possible meanings behind a signal, it makes it overwhelming, and so we may respond very plainly, choosing to not respond in any way that shows we took it or understood it in one specific way. I need you to be direct; I don’t like to guess, even if I’m certain on your intentions.
Thinking a guy is cute is just an observation not her being into him idk
Definitely. I've met plenty of attractive men that I never even contemplated getting involved with.
Personality is a huge factor too. They can be attractive physically, but their personality can be a total turn off, or even just not what you're looking for. Just the act of getting hit on by a cute guy shouldn't be a deciding factor for if you're willing to date them. It only opens up the possibility.
yeah exactly
@@martibee8984 Right!! How is he missing the fact that even if OP *was* interested, that fact could change after the dude made things awkward by doing the whole "you don't like meeee" thing in front of their friends? I would get the ick so fast no matter what the person looked like lmaoo
I was looking for this comment! YES! Thank you!
You are insane lmao I can find a guy is attractive and not want him
Saying someone cute doesn't always equal "I like them"
I mean maybe her way of saying hes cute is a way of her saying "he thinks his looks means he can get w/e he wants"
Exactly!
W/e ?
@scammer7640 it stands for whatever
@@scammer7640 w/e presumably translates to "What ever"
@@memyself5866 Yes 🙂
Being asked straight up “are you autistic” feels the same as being asked “is there a medical reason for you acting weird”. Being quiet and reserved is not weird, it's not a bad thing, and it doesnt NEED a medical or psychological reason for it.
My autistic friend once went on a rant about why people think she would be all bubbly and smiles and energetic if she wasnt autistic. Who's to say she wouldn't be just as quiet but with more eye contact and more emotionnal control (her words, not mine). She isn't wrong in her frustration. When someone is neirodivergent, people assume 100% of their behavior and personnality is due to the divergence.
Finding someone cute doesn't mean you're interested in them. I've met some very attractive people in my life that I wouldn't touch if you paid me. I kind of love how chilly that girl is. He asked her what she thought about him and she said she doesn't think about him. SAVAGE. It feels like a perfect response. His questions are straight up rude because he's assuming if she doesn't engage with him, she must be neuro-spicy. Like he can't see that maybe she genuinely doesn't have anything to say to him. It doesn't read flirtatious to me, but even if you took it that way, she's not obligated to play nice with anyone. Especially not someone who clearly won't take the hint that she's disinterested.
You absolutely nailed it. My thoughts almost exactly.
LMAOO NEURO-SPICY 💀
Haha like fr! I kept thinking the same thing. Like, dude, I can say the same shyte about my brother, that most certainly doesn't mean I'm into him. It just means I am capable of recognizing that this person technically has conventionally attractive physical characteristics. Okay and? That don't mean I'm flirting with said individual. It's just context.
I thought it was obvious from the beginning that she didn't want anything to do with this guy.
For real. I was kind of agreeing with her. That's probably how I would respond to be honest. I'm not interested at all and just because I say someone is cute doesn't equal attraction.
F*** my ADHD - Neuro-spicy is how I will now introduce myself.
The "while trying to follow a recipe on YT" was prolly just painting the extra level of annoyance from the message spam. She's trying to use her phone in the kitchen and constantly getting interrupted by Mr Look-at-me. I'd mention that context too, I think. Adds a layer of her frustration about the experience.
Same...plus it shows she's not just ignoring his messages, she was legitimately busy.
Exactly
Yep, and also, anything is more important and interesting than giving this clown attention.
she reminds me of me lmao, idk why he thinks she's weird, it's normal how she responds (mostly when he's defensive af)
Literally! Like it literally pauses the video every time you get a message, its annoying af.
I feel like the point of OP specifying what she was doing while he was blowing up her phone, was to specify that she was BUSY (following yt recipes takes a lot of focus. sometimes they talk too fast!) so even if she did want to respond, it was literally not a good time for her to. it's the fact that he's losin' it after her not responding in.03 seconds, so he goes on a rant. guys a weirdo anyway byeeee
I personally really love the image of this guy going on a rant, with the little truncated message push notifs going off and her ignoring them as she watches the video. It really paints a picture. Also he couldn't wait like what--how long are most cooking videos, even longform? Half an hour? Tops?
I was just thinking of all the times I’m watching something and a group text starts popping off. You’re constantly having to close the notifications when they’re popping in front of your video. There’s a reason some of my bigger group messages have alerts turned off
I thought of it as more like "I have better things to do than listening to you on your crazy soapbox"
@@gambitgurlisis even if it's real complicated, or the person has a thick accent or something so you gotta watch each part 3 times, that's still only like an hour or so, perhaps 2. For all he knows she could be having a nap, and not even awake to see the messages 💀
25:45 My jaw DROPPED at the second wife shit. I literally couldn't manage to shut my mouth for a solid 10 seconds after hearing that. The sheer nerve is utterly unfathomable.
I don't understand how it's possible for people to say shit like that and not have a single cell in their brain say "hold on... what are we saying?"
"don't bother with that guy he's pathetic and doing anything to get your attention" bro listen to yourself!
I've said, "he's cute," to get it across that someone isn't used to rejection, with absolutely zero interest in getting with them and actively wanting to avoid them because they made me feel like this.
genuine question, how does "he's cute" translate into all of that? im autistic, i dont get it. to me when someone says "he's cute" it just means what it says on the tin. why not just say "he isnt used to rejection" or something?
@@YourPalKindred I think it the "cute" could be used as in "aww, he's cute and naive, little baby is not used to rejection". This is just my guess but cute can be used to describe someone as naive/childish. And it would not be as a compliment then
@@Garsnoos No.
@@YourPalKindred He's cute, so he's not used to rejection. He's physically attractive and therefore is used to getting attention from women, and when a woman suddenly doesn't give him attention, he thinks that something must be wrong with her.
@@Raoul. I'm not even autistic but that seems like a very weird and roundabout way to communicate that.
Not Daniel confusing Stonehenge with the Easter Island heads 😂
😂 indeed it's better that he doesn't remove those moments ❤ but what does the head mean? 🤔
@@ZiggaMauit has a similar meaning to calling someone stone-faced. An expression can be described as ‘stony’ right? It’ll mean different things in different context, but its the equivalent to someone having a blank/unimpressed facial expression in response to something
@@AnEmu404 thank you ❤️ I've seen the heads popping up in posts recently and that's what I was thinking they were but sometimes I'm way off on things like that 😂
Thank you!
Daniel: Why does she keep using the Stonehenge emoji? She uses weird emojis.
Me: It's not Stonehenge, it's Easter Island!
Not me only realizing this because of the comment
She mentioned that she was following a recipe online to imply how unbothered she was. He was obsessing over her responses for multiple days and decided to send a long unhinged message to her meanwhile she was doing something innocuous. There was nothing odd about anything she said. She simply isn’t interested in him and she’s basically calling him insecure without explicitly saying it. She also can observe that he is physically attractive without being interested in dating him at all.
The way I took it is when I’m watching UA-cam and I get spammed with texts, the volume gets lower to make the notification sound so then I have to keep skipping back and it gets really annoying
@@theexploraholicSame, I'm imagining her watching the clip and notifications popping up and covering the crucial instructions
So true!
The best looking guy in my freshmen year of high school was a complete PoS and huge douchebag. He was hot on the outside, but week-old roadkill on the inside.
Yeah that's true, she is just making the point of uninvestment across. But what I feel is that she actively tried to transmit that dissinterest very actively right from the start and I think that is what pushed him to a defensive mode and started demeaning her in order to null her opinion of him being uninteresting. Simultaniously I think this guy hasn't properly experienced rejection and is going way overboard on the insults. He completely lost me there. But I don't think she was nice at any point either
Yeah I agree I took it as a point of clarification. Like, it’s not like she was purposely ignoring him and that he should be offended. But more so she was doing something and it would’ve been hard to respond but she kept seeing the texts and it would’ve been really uncomfortable to get spammed.
"Weird" is definitely the wrong word for the first story. That's super messed up, an abuse of power, completely inappropriate, almost illegal, and frankly that boyfriend sucks; I'd dump him for only saying "that sounds like him". Clearly there's a lack of respect there; that girl is genuinely in danger from that dad and I hope she gets out of that situation and that relationship ASAP.
The fact that the boyfriend _knows_ his dad is like that, and still gave him the OP's number is just... very yucky.
There are few red flags bigger than being passive when a family member behaves inappropriately towards your partner. That situation will only go downhill and she needs to cut and run. Just giving out your gf's number without her permission is bad, but giving it specifically to a family member you know is a creep? Abhorrent.
Also the implication he did it before when even she's only 19. So he hit on gfs younger than her??
@@OuchingTigerLimpingDragon I agree. I'm thinking that is the case of the apple not falling far from the tree.
it's more likely that he know's no matter what he does or says his dad won't stop, as he said it's happened repeatedly, so he's given up trying. It's also possible he could face very dangerous reprocussions from his dad if he didn't give her number to him (he still should have given the gf a heads-up tho). Not everything is black and white and are you surprised someone so vile wouldn't also be vile to his own child?
As a spectrum surfer, if someone asks me with offensive intent if I'm autistic, I respond with "are you stupid?"
that's so real.
Nice one
What if they just say, "No, I'm not. Your turn."
@@nickwilliams2415 Then you say that too and then they say it too and then you say it and it keeps repeating
@@magnet_taco Why would I ever repeat myself?
9:18 “i like potatos and town of salem” is an awesome personality!
I don’t think saying someone is cute is equivalent to being interested in pursuing something with them.
Imo op seems like the kind of girl who likes to keep a safe distance from guys they don’t trust and maintained a healthy disinterest in her communication to promote that distance. I think the note about her following a recipe on yt was to indicate that she is happily and peacefully going about her life/interests in contrast to the madness happening in the messages she’s not even paying attention to.
@@malisaurus2367 Agreed 100%. I did not find it weird to say that she was watching a thing on YT. Just explaining that she was in the middle of something and didn't check her phone but wasn't purposely ignoring crazy dude (she didn't know yet how crazy he was).
Yeah I feel like she was saying that objectively
Exactly this! And exactly as @@MangoPanic said! It was just an observation that would help explain why he feels so butthurt that OP wasn’t giving him the attention he expected to get.
THANK YOU.
Right out the gate with excessive text guy I was seeing red flags tbh. As someone who’s quiet and just trying to mind my ps and qs like this girl, I did not sense any flirting on her end at all, as if I were to say “I don’t think about you” that would be hint number one to fuck off. It’s not even subtle! Girl said “I’m not interested” and the guy thought it was a good time to bring up the idea of being a daddy like wtf. Leave her alone
THANK YOU. The absolute entitlement he has for her attention and the aggression leading up to that tantrum was wild. It does matter if she's autistic or not. If she's not showing interest in you LEAVE HER ALONE instead of begging her to like you? He's unhinged and needs therapy. He can't handle that someone he likes doesn't like him. It's so embarrassing.
Fr like take no for an answer jeez
What does "mind my ps and qs" mean?
@@catbatrat1760It's just a saying for minding your own business, not worrying about other people's problems.
Thaaaaaaaannnk yoooouuuuuuuu! That was such a clear, no thank you sir. 😢
I looked up this crazy case on Reddit, apparently the guy stalked her, came to her house multiple times, left her a gift with a creepy message, showed up at her spin class, plus some more insane texts. She contacted the police, who said they can't do anything until he breaks the law (surprise surprise), so basically she's on her own. Some large UA-camrs reviewed the posts like Daniel did now which gave her even more headaches and attention. So basically this girl is on her own while the insane man is stalking her and no-one is doing anything about it. She's in massive danger
oh good god
engaging in possible tresspassing charges but definitely stalking.
Wtf. Do you have a link?
Stalking on its own not being enough to be him "breaking the law" is ridiculous.
@@ellielane2313 I'm not sure how to link it here, if you google the title there's a summary of all 4 posts she made with more detail
"Cute" is a compliment when you're in school. When you're an adult, calling a guy "cute" is more patronizing or friendzone-ish than complimentary. OR, strange to explain, you can say someone is cute or even attractive without wanting to hook up with them.
That “sounds like him” is so scary because if he’s 19 and THIS used to his dad hitting on his girlfriends, he was probably hearing about this way before he was 18
I'm autistic and I think I would be a little offended if someone flat out asked me 'are you autistic', since that means they're looking at me through the lens of a stereotype
Agreed. Especially when coming from a guy like this who clearly meant it as a neg/insult. I would immediately be guarded.
@@RedRum013 wait he clearly meant it as an insult? im also autistic i thought he was just asking genuinely 😭 (ive only seen the first conversation tho)
EDIT: watched the second conversation. ew
Happened to me once in person. Don't know if he was too, and just wanted to ask me to see if we had something in common, but it wasn't fun because I didn't know this guy well and he wasn't nice to most people, so I just took it as him saying "I see you're acting weirdy and need to see if I'm right."
Well, are you autistic?
Yeah, that stick is used as a insult in a lot of communities. Instead of the our now people are calling things are autistic.
There are two kinds of people who ask me “are you autistic” Neurodivergent people who have clocked me and are very blunt, as many of us are. Or people who are trying to make me feel insecure and insult me for being weird and then very awkwardly start sweating when I say “yes, I am actually” with a smile. The sounds like the second.
I'm neurodivergent and can definitely spot things I recognize in other people and I was reading this girl's messages and honestly agreeing with him, she does seem neurodivergent to me lol I wouldn't outright ask someone in case they're insecure about it but I would definitely be assuming it atp.
I was thinking similarly, that the only people who’d ask like that are those that can recognize autism symptoms as autism symptoms and doesn’t just blindly stigmatize it or someone who sees autism as an insult and is asking rhetorically as a way of saying “you’re a freaky weirdo and should stop acting the way you act.” Most allistic people can recognize when someone’s different, but instead of making the connection “oh, they might have a different neurotype” they instead just see the person as different and equate that as being wrong, this is why a lot of people who claim to be supportive of autistic people will still be extremely ableist and unaccepting to anyone who shows autistic traits, even if they know someone is autistic they will still have no tolerance for them displaying traits of it. My mother watched corny autism shows like Atypical and The Good Doctor because I’m diagnosed autistic and yet she would still be upset at me for displaying even the most basic of autism symptoms like the characters in those shows.
I have AuDHD & I actually don’t think she’s autistic based off of her texts and her behavior that the roach described.
I have a passionate dislike for arrogent men and I think that was her case. Like maybe she sensed that about him from the start and thus couldn’t bother to entertain him by laughing at his jokes (that probably weren’t even funny but people will laugh at someone’s bad jokes if that person is attractive enough) and being friendly with him.
I experienced a weird older colleague of mine (when I was 18 and he was 26 😀) making it desperately obvious that he was into me so I started avoiding him and having as minimal contact as possible. Because I was trying to avoid the awkward situation of him confessing to me and he creeped me out.
I imagine It’s not easy to limit contact with someone when he’s part of your friendgroup.
So I’m assuming here that she actually wasn’t that fond of him from the beginning and is leaving that out to make the first texts of the series seem more sensational. But yeah I’m kinda judging based off my own experiences so it’s just a crazy theory.
BTW at first I thought the texts were entirely fabricated since his creepy desperation was like a toxic character straight out of some cringy wattpad story 🤠 Like seriously who talks like that?
Lmao I once had a teacher assign the class something (it was a kinda new topic) and he came over to my desk to see what I had done so far and he said “whatever (my name) is taking, you all need to be taking it too” to the rest of the class. I straight up said “Adderall. I’m on adderall.” With a perfectly straight face. And he sputtered out “then I guess everyone else needs adderall”
That's the right reaction. It's like a healing shiv. Hurts no one it's not supposed to.
She is not engaging he is trying to be friendly he's trying to be funny he's trying to have a conversation and she's just not interested. And there's something really weird about a guy who assumes that if she isn't engaging with him then there is something wrong with HER.
That man doesn't know how to read a room. He probably doesn't even know he's in a room 💀💀
It's typical narcissistic behaviour. The guy is dangerous af
I agree, I think he is ironically getting "neged" by the girl. Not intentionally but the result is the same. He is so sure he's hot shit that any chink in that ego armor is like a dam breaking. "Well, if this girl I find value in because I'm attracted to her doesn't love me that means I may not be perfect which is impossible."
Look, I was a broken little emotionally abused boy when I first started dating at the end of high school. I had no clue how to respond (this was the pre-internet era) when I was rejected. It hurts so your initial response is to be nasty back, depending on how you're rejected, obviously. I would often take girls literally when they would say, "No, sorry, I have to go to the store later." when I would ask them out and say, "Well, I can go with you!" and... not get it. They were trying to be nice and I was being a clingy idiot. I don't think I ever responded to anything as harshly or horribly as this dude did, save for a long-term relationship that ended with the girl cheating and ghosting me.
That was me having hurt, anger, frustration, and pain without a place to put it and just talking horribly to her. I apologized to her years later and she forgave me, thankfully. This dude, though, needs to learn real quick that disinterest is almost always an answer by itself. If it's ambiguous, or you're not certain and weren't given a hard, "No." I think it's reasonable to try again later or something but be mindful that anything but a "yes" is a "no".
333 (i didn’t like your comment)
He also probably became so fixated because she wouldn't engage. His ego couldn't handle a woman not interested in him.
The recipe thing made perfect sense to me. She’s clarifying that he was bugging the shit out of her and won’t just leave her alone to prepare her food. That dude has a massive ego and kudos to OP for putting him in his place.
14:38 cuz imagine you’re following a recipe and it’s getting interrupted by walls of texts lol
That girl said "I don't really think about you" 500000% aura
Narc guy went full stalker. I think in the end she got a restraining order against him. He tried to turn the friend group against her, but she showed them his texts, and solved the problem. He might be attractive physically, but he's lacking in every other department.
Also, stating that someone is cute doesn't mean you def want to date them. You could simply be making an observational statement. I've even said people I couldn't stand are good looking because it was the truth. She may have actually thought he was cute enough to give him a chance if he had acted differently.
Well, I'm glad she got a restraining order in the end, I was so concerned for her. I felt like I was reading something from a horror film.
@@Imreallyboredsick if I'm remembering correctly, he didn't give her a choice. He even started leaving gifts at her door. I was concerned for her too. I've been in those situations. They're scary.
ok i'm autistic and 1. i would be pissed if someone felt entitled to know my disability status without knowing them well but also 2. he kinda ate with the 'into some trains or shit'. like i hate this man but damn that did make me laugh
edit - i also think the way he asked if she was autistic is rude! i think a good rule of thumb is if an autistic person wants to tell you about their neurodivergence it's their choice - they don't owe you anything. but if you're going to ask someone if they're autistic you need a better reason than "my masculine charms do not work on this woman - alas, she must be autistic :(". and you also need more grace and tact when asking lmao
Honestly, I don't think he was trying to be funny. I think he was being dead serious in a derogatory way, so it's great that it turned out more ridiculous and funny than the insult he was going for.
I’ve autistic family and once someone asked me if they had “that vaccination disease” and astaghfirullah I had to laugh
Asking someone straight up “are you autistic?” Because they arent reacting to your jokes or flirts is kinda out of line, in my autistic opinion, i would be weirded out and yeah maybe a little offended because my disinterest in someone doesnt mean im autistic, it means im not interested.
He thinks there must be something “wrong” with her because of her not playing into his games
Honestly yeah I feel bad at laughing at the train bit, it was funny! But again his whole crazy rant just I couldn't take seriously in the first place what a clown
The train line was genuinely so funny it might become an in joke with me and my autistic friends
“Are you autistic”
Pickup lines are getting crazy nowadays
"hey babe, are you autistic? because uhhhhhhhhhhh"
"Girl, are you autistic? Because I'm the last piece of the puzzle." XD
Just cause you think someone's cute doesn't mean you're necessarily interested in pursuing them or dating them.
Ok, Daniel. You can think someone is cute without wanting to pursue them. This guy is in her friend group. He's not HER friend. She doesn't really know him, and while she doesn't (or didn't) dislike him, she didn't have any particular interest in getting to know him either. He made a joke at her expense in front of her friends earlier that day, so obviously she's not gonna be wanting to have a casual chat with him. He came in with accusatory language, like she needs an excuse to not be interested. Her language was dismissive because she was trying to dismiss him. Then he crossed the line.
I don’t think he embarrassed her in front of the friend group at the dinner, he is so clearly flirting with her it’s kind of annoying that she is (what seems like) pretending not to get it. That type of open banter among friends is so textbook for confident and typical guy flirting that I would put it in my “top 5 signs a guy likes you” I mean, come on. For her to engage him and keep the convo going, asking open ended questions and making jokes, using emoji and lols and lmaos just to take screenshots of the conversation and share them with everyone (so she doesn’t mind dragging her business out in front of friends) including people who have slept with him (considering she said it was to all the girls in the group and later says he has slept with two of the girls in the group) feels very antagonistic, very drama-inducing, and mean girl behavior.
Her showing and discussing his texts with friends and strangers (and this is before they became unhinged) feels like a power move first over her female friends that have slept with him (I imagine that stung to see a guy you like explicitly pursuing a friend) and then over him when she shares them openly online and invites strangers to mock him for liking her. She’s playing games with him and humiliating him, spending significant time and energy discussing him with others yet denying him the dignity of an actual real and honest reply to him directly until giving her numbered list. She’s not too busy, she’s stirring up shit and making herself the center of attention and now she’s got a real genuine “crazy” “stalker” she can feel superior to.
Her being autistic is the only explanation for her being what is, in neurotypicals, deliberately obtuse and rude. If she were autistic it would make sense, as a neurodivergent I would be relieved that someone understood my strangeness for what it was and at least was checking in on potential alternatives before misinterpreting my actions to be flirtatious. He gave her every opportunity to clarify her feelings about him asking her directly and getting confusing replies that could have been kinder and clearer. He asked _her_ about her behavior. She toyed with him and then used his attempt at communication to get him ostracized from the group. Again, all is not well that ends well. This, minus the updates where he unravels, is a public flogging of a simple yet immature attempt at flirting and an eventual unravelling of an unhealthy mind. Treating normal “cute and chill” people this way would be mean and unnecessary, but I think she got what she wanted out of this.
It’s pretty wild that I sympathize even a little bit with such an obviously trash dude, but really I just feel bad for everyone who doesn’t have their own delusions of grandeur to fall back on when interacting with this lady.
Also I’m genuinely relieved to hear that gen z are actively engaging in group activities and hanging out in person! The news makes us think they never leave the house or get laid so that’s giving me hope, truly.
WHY IS MY REPLY SO LONG WTF
BC I AM ACTIVELY PROCRASTINATING THATS WHY
SORRY FEEL FREE TO DISREGARD MY DISSERTATION
You’d be surprised how many people like that exist, similar with me and my coworker, I wasn’t talkative towards anymore, I really don’t talk unless you come up to me and want to discuss something or if I feel the need to talk. But I guess for him it made him think I didn’t like him, he literally eventually asked me if I didn’t like him and I explained I just don’t talk much, and I guess my choice of words did seem a bit off but I mentioned “I didn’t like you or dislike you”, but more in a “I don’t know you so I don’t really have an opinion on you” answer but I think that just made him confirm I didn’t like him. 💀
No hard feelings though but it started making me feel bad cuz I didn’t want him to think I just hated him for no reason.
It’s really just a personality thing, cuz it’s not only him but a lot of outgoing people I’ve interacted with, just if you don’t talk to them you’re the odd one..
@@rainbomgWHAT? i’ve never been in a relationship and i tend to think people are kinder (or meaner) than they are, so feel free to disregard this, but he’s not flirting (yes he is, unfortunately). like another comment said, this is very much “are you autistic, because i want to fix you/figure out what’s wrong with you” instead of any genuine curiosity. she’s not toying with him. she’s just discussing something weird (and gross) that happend to her, no names or pictures. even if he was flirting, what guy flirts via humiliating a girl in front of her friends? she’s not some master manipulator like you’re painting her to be. especially with his one-sided rant, he is definitely going down the “what’s wrong with you, let me fix you” route. also “minus the updates where he unravels”? that’s more than half of the story.
sorry if i come off as rude. if i missed some things, i’m sorry.
@@PPBbunno As a man myself, I can agree that his joke was probably offensive to her, but with that said, most men would laugh at a joke that may or may not be offensive to women. That's simply how men joke with one another. Something that may hurt someone's feelings is usually interpreted by men has a joke, especially when they're friends. The tone of the person's voice when they say something or how they act after they say it, can distinguish it between bullying and joking for men. Of course, women probably don't realize this, thus that mistake is easy to explain. Now, everything after that is inexcusable and he should be locked away forever because he's clearly batsh** insane.
You know it's bad when I did not question it at all when he said, "I'm just gonna scratch my butt real quick." These surprise microphones are getting scarily good.
Saying someone is “cute” is an observation, it doesn’t mean she has a crush 😐
seems unnecessary to include if it's not relevant to the story tho
I wholeheartedly agree
nononononono, most guys think a girl is 10000% in love with them if they are called cute by a girl, doesn't matter what context or intent. guys are just dumb
@@JarmezGDI would say it is relevant, because if he's attractive it kind of makes sense how he's this insane and thinking he's owed her attention because he gets female attention because he's attractive
@@crowbirdy oh I suppose so but you can see how it might cause confusion too
I have high functioning autism, which mostly manifests itself as just making me not talk, and while I don’t think asking someone (jokingly) if their autistic isn’t offensive, if someone asked me in full seriousness “Are you on the spectrum” in itself wouldn’t piss me off if a close friend asked me that, but if someone I barely know, (let alone someone this weird) asked, I’d have their ass for it.
“Women owe you nothing” YES YEEEEEESSSSSSSSS
17:35 As an Autistic ADHDer, yes. It was incredibly offensive for that guy to have asked in that moment. Asking the question itself is not the offensive part, it’s the fact that the question was completely unprompted.
Personally, I have asked people if they’re autistic, usually because I’m curious to know since I recognize the signs in that person due to my own experiences. But it’s not like I ask the question completely unprompted. I usually only end up asking when we’re talking about neurodivergence and other similar topics that can lead to the question.
Asking under the context that he did was incredibly rude and disrespectful.
i feel like its also different when it's a neurodivergent person asking if someone else is neurodivergent, because most of the time it's us looking for community and connection, and trying to make friends with other neurodivergent people
Really depends on why he asked in an insulting way yea im punching you as a joke I'm probably going to laugh
We need fewer daddies and more fathers.
Nailed it
Just because she said he was cute on reddit doesnt mean she is interested in him lol She very clearly has zero interest in him but he keeps pestering her. Her describing him to reddit as cute is not a green light for him to say any of the things he said to her. I feel like this is obvious
In the beginning it did sound as if she’s into him though especially her mentioning it. The rest after that was absolutely insane from him.
Real. In no way did I see her initial conversation flirty but blunt and disinterested. I would be put off too if he tried starting drama about her not liking him then texting later & accusing her of being autistic in a very rude way. The fact he kept pushing set off so many red flags but it’s ok since he’s such a “good guy” 🤢
@@LeanAndMean44nah I don’t think there was any flirtation at all. She said he’s “cute and chill” as a way to let reddit know that the guy seemed OK at first, which is why she was even talking to him in the first place. Same way someone would start a conversation with, “Yeah, she was shy and nice.” without actually being close or caring about the person they were talking about. It’s just a little description.
Doesn’t mean she’s into him, just another way of saying she didn’t expect him to be such a dimwit since he seemed chill at first.
@@SmeltingSmoresright???? women be replying dudes' wall of texts with one single word, and somehow they still think there's flirting in the girl's part like??????? lol
@@LeanAndMean44 How? Literally where did you get that impression?
When the guy said "you either have a severe mental disorder or asexual" I facepalmed. What he's referring to is being aromantic
Someone who's not autistic someone asked me with like so much genuineness.... it still got to me. Not because autism is icky but because someone found me so different they couldn't really imagine that I had the same brain chemistry as them. I do have adhd I found out some time after but it still hurt for someone who always tried to find my crowd and fit in.
Also I think some people are cute, doesn't make me want to date them.
I love how “My Dad Won’t Stop DMing my gf” isn’t even the most insane thing in this video
'You've been single all this time, it's extremely suspicious' Ok, so, that's just fucking creepy that he kept tabs on that the entire time. I didn't end up in another relationship for 10 years after my previous one fell apart and in part it was likely because of who I am as a person (demisexuality is the short of it) so he'd likely consider that suspicious too. That guy sounds like a goddamn stalker, holy fuck...
EDIT: OH MY FUCKING GOD, IT GOT EVEN WORSE! HOW?!
I genuinely can't believe this guy is real, just for the sake of my own sanity. Please please be faked messages or something. Also hello fellow demi!
Literally this - I have been accused several times of being gay by a friend I've known for a year, just because they can't fathom that I've been too busy for a relationship and have standards. It's wild. Also, this guy is completely freaking nuts.
Demi reunion up in here 😄
He kind of insults her like 'wtf is wrong with you' and then he says I love you. I honestly don't know what he wants at this point
I'd seen the first two parts before. I had no idea what was coming
Get a restraining order for that narcissist.
She's extremely patient, I would have already called the police and stated I felt unsafe in the community because of him.
The second you resort to name calling, you’ve lost the battle
I'm autistic and I don't think it's outright offensive to ask if someone is on the spectrum. It's not bad to be autistic.
That being said, this guy was absolutely doing it in a condescending and seemingly ableist way.
He couldn't rationalise why OP didn't like him and from how he describes them "liking trains", he probably doesn't have the best view on autistic people.
It seemed like she mentioned him being “kinda cute” and their friend group being evenly split between genders because her friends (and him) are expecting her to be interested and start dating him. Her noting him being “kinda cute” and listing all of the personality traits she doesn’t like is probably a repeat of something she told her friends when they asked why she wasn’t interested and she wanted to say something nice about him before rejecting the idea.
I’m autistic (late diagnosed as it’s the case with most autistic women) and that really depends. But if someone asked me if I’m autistic because I don’t respond to them hitting on me, I think it’s really offensive because the question implies that there is something wrong with me for not being receptive to their flirting. If I’m with other autistic friends and someone asks me if I’m autistic as well, it’s ok. There is nothing wrong with being autistic and I’m not ashamed of it. It’s people’s perception of the disability that’s wrong, people like this guy in the story. As a general rule of thumb, don’t ask people if they are autistic when they don’t perform social rules the way you expect them to. There are tons of other explanations as to why people might act the way they do without putting it on autism.
Just because someone looks cute to you doesn't mean you'll want to date them.
20:28 The thing is, Daniel, that you can refer to someone as cute, find them attractive and still not want to date them. Not even just because of how they act, but because of NUMEROUS REASONS. Just because someone says you're attractive doesn't mean they want to date. Just because she said he's cute doesn't mean she's obligated to try to date him when she clearly doesn't want that. You were SERIOUSLY tripping taking his side, my dude. Like, really, I found several dudes in my high school class physically cute, but their personalities made them entirely unattractive and even a cute face couldn't fix that. Being rude to someone is such a huge turn off, especially when they are being rude to you personally. This man literally started out the conversation rude as hell and you stretched to your LIMITS giving him the benefit of the doubt, all way until he said something so crazy that even you couldn't defend it anymore. Maybe listen to both sides before you just assume? And yeah no, if you think someone is autistic and you want to know, do NOT ask them what's "wrong" with them, because that's just inherently messed up. On top of that, even if I WAS autistic, I would be super offended at someone directly asking me like it's any of their business or right to know. If someone out and says they are autistic, fine, good, great even! But if you're just wondering and they've never said anything about it, don't just assume.
But its more fun to watch h him change his mind half way through because on a first read that what you mught think otherwise id listrn to the ai voices
This is kinda a charged response just for him initially misunderstanding a situation
I hope that woman is safe. Men like that are the reason I would 100% choose to be lost in the woods with a random bear than a random human man... Best case scenario, he's narcissistic pseudo stalker. Worst case, he'll flat out assault a woman, possibly even kill her. Big yikes, I really hope he left OP alone and that she's safe.
She set very firm boundaries though, I really liked her response. Hopefully she went to the police as well.
Even I would choose a bear and I AM a Bear
There’s a more recent comment on this video saying that a more recent Reddit update said that he did start stalking her and she went to the police but they wouldn’t do anything. So yea I hope she’s safe too :(
It definitely definitely hurts me when someone I do not have a huge level of trust with goes and asks me if I’m autistic. Because when I’m asked that, it usually means I’ve done something unusual and they are either deciding to scrutinize me or give me a pass.
Although also because I’m autistic, I would read that guy as trying to INSULT ME and not GET WITH ME
It does really seem like it's both though
@@autopsyblue in this one oddly specific scenario, I do unfortunately have to agree.
I'm autistic and woah that guy is ableist. I think he doesn't know what autism is outside of the context of schoolyard insults. I've been asked if I'm autistic both as an insult and as a genuine question, and he definitely meant that as an insult. I'm personally usually okay with it as a genuine question, but different autistic people have different preferences. I'm never okay with being asked it as an insult, for obvious reasons.
I don't think it had anything to do with his feelings towards autistic people tbh. It was only to do with the fact that she wasn't interested in him. (Not defending the guy, he's a cunt)
19:28 lmao right after this line "You make me want to become a daddy." I got an ad that started out just screaming and I thought Daniel played it as a reaction clip and I was just like "a little overdramatic, but fair".
I'm on the spectrum with some other issues that aren't relevant rn, and I'm super emotionally sensitive not just with my emotions, but with other people's too. I grew up under narcissistic abuse, and verbal and mental warfare type, and due to that, I am extremely good at sensing and noticing people's intentions and emotions, how they speak, etc. I think that guy from the quiet story is intimidated by the fact that OP is one of the very few who saw past his exterior and felt his rotten inside. He's wondering why his trick didn't work this time.
Daniel PLEASE!! 😂💀
Thinking someone is cute does NOT mean she is interested.
Hi, I’m on the spectrum and I just wanted to say that for me personally, it’s not very insulting if you quietly assume I’m autistic; (though for me you shouldn’t ask, I should be the one to tell you if I feel like it and am comfortable enough to tell you), but the tone is what matters the most and the guy in message at 17:20 was very condescending and rude, and was throwing up dozens of red flags. Especially the comment about the trains, yes it is a stereotype that is sometimes true, but it can be hurtful to assume that just because you think someone could be on the spectrum means they like trains; and that’s just an example.
Daniel: sees 🗿
Also Daniel: Stonehenge!
It just means stoic or indifferent expression man.
That, and also it’s an Easter Island head, not Stonehenge
@@themustar601yeah, that's what the comment was about
I accidentally stopped at when it said RIP on screen at 0:17 and it looked as if it was a memorial but Daniels family gave the people making the memorial a horrible picture for it.
Dog, that "getting a bunch of texts while trying to watch a recipe on youtube" made me genuinely so mad
Getting a message that takes up the screen or distracts me when I'm ACTIVELY TRYING TO LEARN FROM THE VIDEO JUST 😤😤
I’m autistic. Personally I’d be unhappy if someone just straight up asked if I was autistic. I’ll volunteer that info if I think it’s relevant but just to asked like that? No.
That makes sense
I saw a different video covering this story and that comment section said for the most part"the question itself out of the blue wouldn't bother me. In fact, it's appreciated!!"
I remember being really confused by that comment section
Same. I don't mind if people ask me. But it's only really if they pick up on my neurodivergent habits. If, however, someone were to ask me the question as we meet for the very first time, that's when I would be uncomfortable. It's obviously an outlandish scenario, but that's typically how I will compare the differences in approach
24:56 and the fact that he didn’t even get rejected rejected 😭 he just started tweaking out on his own 😭😭😭 homegirl was just vibing and he made up a whole fanfic in his head, got mad when she didnt follow along, then went crazy when she didnt try to coddle him after he snapped at her for not understanding what the deal was (bcs to her there was no deal ???) which made him snap again and act like a total creep…. so she blocked him… and he decided she must not understand whats going on ……..
I've actually experienced this! I was at a bookstore buying some stuff, and when I got to the front to purchase my things, the clerk at the front (maybe in her mid-20s) asked "Hey, weird question, but are you on the spectrum?"
I was so dumbfounded by the comment that I asked, "uh...the gay one?" Luckily there was no harm done and she explained she has a sort of sense for these things, but it was definitely a weird thing to ask someone who was just buying some DnD books.
😂 I couldn't come up with a funnier retort if I tried! The fact that it wasn't even meant to be funnier just cracks me up more.
DND = autism?
She's probs autistic. I do this and I'm autistic too. We do tend to have a sense for these things hahah
"I have a sense for these things" and going "DnD = autism", yeah it's funny how I know exactly what type of person she is lol
JESUS that guy in OP's friend group is unhinged as hell. incredibly self-obsessed and kind of scary?? he's way too obsessed with her and she should get a restraining order against him or something. yiiiiikes
Saying a guy is cute and being interested in said cute guy are two VERY different things😂😂
15:53 SHE JUST DODGED A BUUULEEEEETTTTTTT🎵🎵
As an Autistic woman the "What's your deal?" had me laughing so hard because I get that all the time. In this context, the autism question wasn't being asked because he cared but because he wanted a reason to write off her disinterest in him it seems. It's not offensive to me if someone is just trying to understand more about me, but no one who cares has ever just dropped that question mid conversation either. Unfortunately I know a lot of guys who are being led this direction by the incel culture garbage being posted everywhere
The guy asking the girl if she’s autistic is acting like creepy dude. Even without that question, a response stating she doesn’t think about him is just honest and straightforward. Stating how awesome he thinks he is and how much better he is than other dudes is a big red creeper flag. Dude shoulda just dropped it. Some people just have trouble finding the words to engage in conversations and some people just don’t laugh a lot, at anything. Taking it so personally, so quickly says a lot about that guy.
Finally found a better pick up line than "Are you depressed?" 15:41 😂😂
I'm autistic and "you may not be autistic but you sure act like you're into some trains or some shit" is the funniest fucking thing I've heard all day
"He's pathetic and so f***ing desparate for your approval"
...I wonder if he bothered to repeat that part back to himself.
I'm autistic and I only get offended if neurotypical people ask me that, because for me 100% of the time a neurotypical person asks if I'm on the spectrum they have meant it in a really mean way
'i know a few of you are with autism' make me laugh so hard, I don't know why. But yes as an autistic person I'd probably get annoyed at this dude just straight up asking as a way to suss out why I won't flirt back
It cracked me up too. The typical phrase is 'with child', meaning pregnant, so that's where my mind was lol.
I have never sent unsolicited pics to any girl ever, but whenever any girl I know recieve one, I always give them the same suggestion. Send the same picture to any and all female family members and inform them of the original sender.
It usually stops the interaction rather quickly.
12:32 him saying wow to her being obviously put off by how he asked and spoke about and to her is funny. She seems standoffish bc I assume they've hung out and he's tried to flirt and she didn't want it. Like genuinely she doesn't care about him that way she said he was cute bc she isn't blind you don't have to always date who you find cute.
Am autistic. Personally I think the worse part of it is that they barely talk and he just flat out asks her, implying that she has to be autistic for not being interested in him? Which is gross, and he continues to be weird and gross toward her for just...not being interested in him? Mans needs an ego check
17:01 ayyyyyyy
Also saying someone looks like they’re into trains is crazy 💀
Ugh…the number of times someone has gotten offended because I’m quiet….usually this comes from people who display a lot of extroversion, but are also in need of validation. They can’t sit with the idea that not everyone can or wants to feed their ego or reassure them. Often by having a problem with it instead of enjoying the person for who they are only makes the situation worse because you’re wasting energy trying to change someone AND communicating that you think they’re defective as a person.
The best and closest people to me have never gotten on my case for not saying as much and eventually I felt comfortable enough to open up. I am certainly for quiet people trying harder to reach out and make conversation, and it’s fair for others to wish they could get closer and understand a quiet person, but I think people like this guy are walking red flags because that desire turns into rude behavior. It’s about him and winning someone over rather than enjoying who they are in that moment and letting them decide when they’re ready.
I don’t have autism, but I have experienced this kind of crap. The person pushing me NEVER gets into my circle. Whether OP has autism or not, this nonsense happens to others with quiet personalities as well.
Saw the whole thing… outgoing folks, value and look out for your quieter friends…their mere presence may very well expose the creeps in your midst!
Yeah, I absolutely get where you're coming from. I was thinking along the same lines, although I'm the outgoing one. However, I married the quiet one, and getting closer to him and seeing him open up was a treasure!
You know, I’m glad I hate myself… because man, people who think they’re the best thing ever only seem to upset or hurt other people.
Being asked if I'm autistic is fine. Being asked that when the person is clearly just telling me I'm weird, no thank you. Ignorance, stereotyping, and bad intentions are easy to see.
You can still think someone is cute but, not want to date them. That guy just made me want to puke. I can’t stand arrogant people who don’t get why they’re not attracting everyone. God, I’m so enraged by that. Some people are just stand offish and she had good reason to be. Maybe she heard stories from her friends about him and that’s why she wasn’t feeding into his arrogance. I don’t know. But she did do a great job setting boundaries.
Btw. The emoji was an Easter Island head not Stonehenge.
😊 The story at 10:57.She's not saying that he's cute like she likes him.She is saying it more like he's attractive to look at.She recognizes that he's attractive but she has no romantic feelings for him.
19:28 As a guy I'd rather be single for the rest of my life than message someone like that
As a woman, I'd rather be single for the rest of my life than be messaged like that
@@antine1279 🤝
I will say in regards to don't engage, if you think you have a stalking case, you HAVE TO express very clearly that you do not want contact. Legally it can't be considered stalking unless you have expressed explicitly that you do not want them to contact you. If you have done that and they keep contacting you, then you have a stalking case.
I'd never be offended if someone asked me if I was autistic? Being offended implies that I'm being accused of something I would be displeased to be found to be..... 🧐
I hope that 10 years from now he has chronic insomnia because this conversation keeps him up at night.
6:12 I love the editor's comentary on how bad and non-committal your air-diagram is. 😆
8:08 This hit way too close to home. There's a dude (my best friend's ex boyfriend) who I used to be friends with until he started threatening my life, my friend's life, my friend's family's life, his own life, and schools. When we tried to cut him off, he kept finding ways to reach us. He would create new accounts, find us on other social platforms, and even manipulate people my friend and I were close to into asking us about him (we told those friends afterward who he was and they blocked him). Guys like this are creeps, but unfortunately there is no solid strategy to get rid of them. I've had to resort to abandoning all those old accounts and letting him think I died (my last messages to him were about the hospital before I blocked him). Like he's genuinely scary enough to warrent that 😭
As an autistic person, I’m okay with people asking in the right context. “Are you autistic (because knowing that would help me understand you better)?” or even “are you autistic (because I’m genuinely curious)?” are fine, but “are you autistic (as an insult)?” is gross.
I’ve had an ex-friend call me a narcissist before and it seriously made me self conscious and wonder if that was actually the case… this dude helps me realize I’m nothing like that and that my friend is projecting 😂
I personally prefer to scream at my friends. who cares that they live across the earth? they'll know. They always know.
Lmaooo what? 😂
@@udontevenwannaknowbruv you heard me
You gotta scream in low-frequency vibrations, though.They don't die out over long distances. _So_ much cheaper than texting!
As someone who is visibly autistic, it would definitely not offend me if it was just "are you autistic". If I do ask someone else if they're autistic, I do not just unprompted say "are you autistic?" though. Usually, I'll say "I've noticed you do x and x and x, and that x and x and x seem to bother you a lot." Then, "Are you neurodivergent, by any chance?" and then "Do you think you might be autistic?"
I hope you don't mind me asking but what does visibly autistic mean?
I think they mean high functioning which is alot more obvious I guess! But that's just me, usually signs that are obvious are like [unable to control the volume of your voice, obsessively talking about one thing, shy or reserved at first and bad at conversations with others, mannerisms like touching or picking at yourself] but everyone's experience is different!^^@@catlover.triangleheadprod4887
@@catlover.triangleheadprod4887im also confused by that 😭
@@madness_maniai feel like low needs autistic people are harder to clock than high needs autistic people tho, at least that's the general concensus of society and why many low needs autistic ppl go undiagnosed for so long. low needs autistic people are usually high masking
@madness_mania Isn't that "Low functioning"? I thought the term came from the concept that if you're unable to hide it, you're not good at functioning in society.
I HATE THIS MAN. u know which man i’m talking about. daniel, i think you’re right in saying it’s his weird insecure way of hitting on this girl, im so glad she’s standing her ground the whole time
update after i finished the video: agreed he might kill her yikes, im wondering if this will turn up as evidence in a future case
12:35 it's an orchid and I love her style she's awesome!