How To Have "Perfect" Social Skills

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  • Опубліковано 6 вер 2017
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    Graham Norton has what many people would consider their ideal charisma - for two reasons.
    One, Graham Norton doesn’t need to hog the spotlight in order to shine. And two, Graham Norton seems to have the ability to make ANYONE like him. From rockstars to movie stars to professional athletes, people from all walks of life seem to love being around him.
    So today we’re going to talk about a 4 step formula that Graham Norton uses to make people love him even while he teases them, and how you can use it to make yourself both funnier and more well liked.
    0:34 Graham Norton creates a warm and positive connection
    1:26 Graham Norton compliments especially on Graham Norton Show
    2:55 How to be funnier and how to make people like you
    5:33 How to use banter and teasing to get everyone on the same level
    9:00 Graham Norton does the art of self deprecation
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    Website: www.charismaoncommand.com
    Facebook: / charismaoncommand
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 1,3 тис.

  • @sabahaltaf2285
    @sabahaltaf2285 5 років тому +2424

    Jimmy Fallon never clicked on a video so fast

    • @HaloLvl43Legit
      @HaloLvl43Legit 5 років тому +66

      Exactly what I was thinking. It's like he's a robot trying to emulate this, but failing. He just fake laughs at everything and tries to force jokes and compliments. It all feels artificial.

    • @KaylaSaysRawwr
      @KaylaSaysRawwr 5 років тому +30

      I love me some jimmy fallen but I don’t hate on his awkwardness to be honest I just think he’s some awkward dude bad at jokes who managed to climb up in the interview world so not fake but good for him getting there. Amazing accomplishment for someone who may struggle with being funny or whatever

    • @HBSuccess
      @HBSuccess 4 роки тому +2

      Absolute consummate phony, or at least that is how he comes off. I can't watch The Tonight Show anymore (Grew up with Carson.. Liked Leno....Liked Connan...)

    • @AGFuzzyPancake
      @AGFuzzyPancake 4 роки тому +2

      @@KaylaSaysRawwr It sure is amazing for him. It'd be an amazing if I were the president too but like Jimmy Fallon I'm not amazing for the people.

    • @Pos608
      @Pos608 4 роки тому

      LMFAOOOO

  • @Grimm472
    @Grimm472 6 років тому +4495

    Learning to socialize is like learning a foreign language from scratch.

    • @suaptoest
      @suaptoest 5 років тому +38

      You nailed it! I just thought that there's much to change before he would become popular here.
      First of all, new body language!

    • @aviozstudio4903
      @aviozstudio4903 5 років тому +3

      exactly

    • @milenamijuskovic2340
      @milenamijuskovic2340 5 років тому

      @@suaptoest verbs

    • @lia-ww2fp
      @lia-ww2fp 5 років тому +6

      I feel attacked

    • @dancechica
      @dancechica 5 років тому +2

      It certainly feels that way to me

  • @louisefox4852
    @louisefox4852 5 років тому +757

    Graham Norton is a genuinely nice guy. Being genuine is really, really important. And he's sharp and clever. He's not forced, he's spontaneous.

    • @johnevans9665
      @johnevans9665 4 роки тому +5

      errrrm I met him lol hes not that nice to non-famous people

    • @louisefox4852
      @louisefox4852 4 роки тому +7

      @@johnevans9665 that's such a pity! So sorry to hear that! Maybe you caught him on an 'off' day?!

    • @johnevans9665
      @johnevans9665 4 роки тому +2

      @@louisefox4852 well yes I can imagine it would be really annoying if everyone knew you but you dodnt know them lol

    • @louisefox4852
      @louisefox4852 4 роки тому +1

      @@johnevans9665 yes, not sure if I could cope with that to be honest!

    • @lisahannah5675
      @lisahannah5675 4 роки тому +3

      @@johnevans9665 As someone who works in the UK entertainment industry, I can vouch for that too. Important thing to remember is that he's *paid* to be endearing on his show to his guests. It's not a barometer for how he is in real life. He's not the worst by far out there though.

  • @BalancedEarth
    @BalancedEarth 6 років тому +1871

    I'd like to see a video about someone doing the exact opposite of charisma and breaking apart how they could have improved. Whether that be a character from a movie or an actual interview.

    • @mostlyvoid04
      @mostlyvoid04 6 років тому +13

      yes!!

    • @ProdbyLex849
      @ProdbyLex849 6 років тому +27

      Watch the Will Smith vs Jaden Smith video

    • @merlinohtwotwooh7777
      @merlinohtwotwooh7777 6 років тому +15

      That would actually be really cool to see, even if its a character I'd love to see them break down ways to improve charisma in the moment.

    • @Alex-ki1yr
      @Alex-ki1yr 6 років тому

      WhirlwindSkies +

    • @vaibhavguptawho
      @vaibhavguptawho 6 років тому +4

      I think they have a Ned Stark video that does what you're asking for.

  • @samuelvoges1383
    @samuelvoges1383 3 роки тому +54

    Great video which is worth watching
    A small summary:
    1. Create a warm positive connection at the beginning of the interaction
    1. Smile and touch (search for little hints/Hinweise how the person likes to be greeted/welcomed)
    2. Make others feel good with complement based on their accomplishment
    2. Made others lough
    1. Use a wide range of vocal tonality and emotional expression to get a lough
    2. Laughing along with someone else’s jokes (you make them feel like you’re listening to them) remember that laughter and happiness are habits that you can cultivate
    3. Combining achievement-based compliments the person is proud of, playful teases and self deprecating jokes you can tease people while they lough and love you.
    1. Whoever you’re teasing should be laughing along with you
    2. By playfully giving each other a hard time you immediately create a familiar feeling
    3. Be careful don’t attack someones identity and don’t tease something that is unchangeable and important to them
    4. Set the stage by making a sincere complement and you are able to tease little things without offending anyone
    5. Dont make yourself the but of every joke
    4. Be an active listener Dale Carnegie „to be interesting, be interested"

  • @micha781000
    @micha781000 5 років тому +366

    1 Warm friendly vibe, smile, touch, compliment based on accomplishment
    2 humor, and make them feel you get them, laugh along with other's joke
    more time listening than speaking
    3 playfull teasing gives a familiar feeling (dont attack identity, dont tease about something that can not be changed). Best if earlier before, a compliment.
    4 listens intently and focused, let the other talk. To be intersting by being intetested, eyecontact

    • @gxrsky
      @gxrsky 5 років тому +5

      Micha Vlijmen, van I always look for that kind of comment, thx

    • @lanellmalone3023
      @lanellmalone3023 4 роки тому

      Thx

    • @dluque35
      @dluque35 4 роки тому

      Love these. Feel like people nowadays try to WIN over the room and impose power, rather than feeling the vibe out and making everyone feel comfortable. :) need more people like this in the world GVO baby

    • @ladyslick121
      @ladyslick121 4 роки тому

      i love you. thank you for this

    • @PinupSticknerd
      @PinupSticknerd 4 місяці тому

      Appreciate u sir 🫡

  • @Danik0301987
    @Danik0301987 6 років тому +4100

    no the first step Graham does is gets his guests drunk.

    • @u00drk1
      @u00drk1 6 років тому +172

      Yeah, he was on Colbert's show recently and admitted that's how he gets people to talk.

    • @MrALHADE
      @MrALHADE 6 років тому +60

      Kazakh Gamer "does is gets" - RIP English

    • @aminab6075
      @aminab6075 6 років тому +255

      Yet it can't be denied that Graham has an extremely likeable, charismatic and witty personality. Anyway, its not like he's forcing the drinks down their throats! His mentioning of 'liquoring them up' on Colbert's show was a bit of light, British humour which seems to have been awfully misinterpreted within the short time since he was interviewed.

    • @ohhifart1106
      @ohhifart1106 6 років тому +5

      hahaha nailed it! there's also drinks backstage ;)

    • @Achw3l
      @Achw3l 6 років тому +26

      u00drk1 That's just another self deprecating joke lol

  • @goodgirl140
    @goodgirl140 6 років тому +1335

    I've been waiting for you guys to do Graham Norton for a while now! He is the most witty and likable person I know. Love him!

    • @HotStrange
      @HotStrange 6 років тому +9

      goodgirl140 indeed! Didn't take me long to become obsessed with his show either.

    • @figotlatenby588
      @figotlatenby588 6 років тому

      Currently watching him right now.

    • @jakubgruda354
      @jakubgruda354 6 років тому +4

      goodgirl140 You actually know Graham Norton?
      What's he like?

    • @CommenceComments
      @CommenceComments 6 років тому +6

      How long have you known him?

    • @octaviancaesarhibernicus4447
      @octaviancaesarhibernicus4447 6 років тому +1

      goodgirl140 I wonder is he shown in America,?

  • @ch-p2861
    @ch-p2861 6 років тому +749

    Graham Norton is definitely the best talk show host in the world.

    • @vickirosstudor490
      @vickirosstudor490 5 років тому +5

      :-p :-D mmmm...no.

    • @PeopleHealthTru
      @PeopleHealthTru 5 років тому +1

      Best in the world if you want the whole world to act homosexual. It's called homosexual flirting, not 'charisma.' He's not a 'magnetic' or desirable mate to a normal person.

    • @abraham8565
      @abraham8565 5 років тому +15

      @@PeopleHealthTru what do you mean by that?

    • @lavienestpasunlongfleuvetr2559
      @lavienestpasunlongfleuvetr2559 5 років тому +41

      @@abraham8565 what he means is that he's a troll - probably typed his comment from his parents' basement, which he hasn't left in years, lol.

    • @M0kki
      @M0kki 5 років тому +3

      @@vickirosstudor490 mmmm...yes.

  • @chilliard120
    @chilliard120 6 років тому +10

    Graham Norton is, hands down, better than any other talk show host currently on TV. And I'm including the U.S. in that, because his show feels so genuine and he seems like he's having a genuine conversation with each and every one of his guests. Top video, well done guys!

  • @popland1977
    @popland1977 6 років тому +1290

    I think a LOT of Irish people are naturally friendly, complimentary and seek out humour and therefore are widely liked. The accents of Ireland are also very musical so he changes his pitch a lot

    • @MomasBoyOnline
      @MomasBoyOnline 6 років тому +107

      Pop Land I'm Irish and can confirm that characters like Graham are very common here, just from my colleagues alone I can think of three of them that could easily engage anyone in the same way Graham does. However, Graham seems to lightly tease people here but in reality the Irish can actually be very harsh in teasing each other so we grow immune to taking offence and learn to laugh things off. It's to the point that many tourists and migrants here even question if we're being malicious but it's really all l said "for the craic" and not meant to really cause hurt or offence

    • @octaviancaesarhibernicus4447
      @octaviancaesarhibernicus4447 6 років тому +27

      Pop Land I don't know you're nationality but here in Ireland we have what's called "craic",which is having a good time, usually by friends making jokes at other friends expense,and receiving as good as you give. It's part of our culture and it usually happens when we get drunk, well it does when me and my mates get drunk, I shouldn't speak for everyone .

    • @wcgcjd
      @wcgcjd 6 років тому +7

      No not really

    • @cathalsurfs
      @cathalsurfs 6 років тому +4

      You're on the ball there girl! Fair play to ye! :)

    • @TovenDo.O.Video-
      @TovenDo.O.Video- 5 років тому +5

      Yeah, aslo funny how a huge number of friendly charcthers in games/movies have irish accents. It really helps.

  • @alyxisfuentes6596
    @alyxisfuentes6596 2 роки тому +12

    My stepson is 14 and entering the realm of being included in more conversations involving adults. This has been helpful for him. As often he’s the youngest, these tips are helpful to remind him he has plenty to offer a conversation

  • @earl-grey-milk-tea
    @earl-grey-milk-tea 6 років тому +1439

    Can you do more videos on charismatic women, please? A lot of your videos focus on male speakers/personalities and some of the humour or techniques that they use work better in a 'bro' setting or don't always come across well when delivered by a woman - there's something in that society also likes women to be refined and polite. There's a lot of women who don't necessarily use humour all the time, but manage to command respect and have that sense of magnetism around them - some of the TED speakers come to mind as an easy example.

    • @mel818
      @mel818 6 років тому +50

      The one about Adele is amazing!

    • @benjaminaltman4895
      @benjaminaltman4895 6 років тому +87

      Hi C! Absolutely plan to do more women as well as men. Our most popular video ever is actually on Ellen Degeneres. Did you like the recent one on Margaery Tyrell?

    • @TheBlurr12
      @TheBlurr12 6 років тому +13

      Benjamin Altman Tina Fey please!

    • @sassymedea3065
      @sassymedea3065 6 років тому +8

      Jenna Gray Its British banter its all in good fun.

    • @kokolatte825
      @kokolatte825 6 років тому +72

      C that's such a great comment! I was thinking the whole time about how to apply these steps to my own life as a woman and I don't think they will translate as well. Especially with "touching" without coming across as flirty and joking which I think comes across as witty for men and "bitchy" for women.

  • @alibarbi664
    @alibarbi664 6 років тому +117

    If you wanna improve your relationships this is the only channel in the world that makes you feel like you REALLY learnt something at the end of the video. Thank you soooo much!

    • @alibarbi664
      @alibarbi664 6 років тому +9

      We're not talking about 3 technics. Everything can be learnt and if you wanna learn charisma you start studying it and you finish living it. My relationships have improved since I started watching ALL their videos and reading their book. Of course it takes effort, it's not about watching videos and than "done!". You study, you apply these advices , you try, you fail, you observe what's wrong in your behaviors, you continue studying and than you succeed.

  • @gumersindocebollero3261
    @gumersindocebollero3261 6 років тому +2315

    this channel is a great tool for robots

    • @bashyre6877
      @bashyre6877 6 років тому +9

      Gumersindo Cebollero what do u mean?

    • @bloodhooded
      @bloodhooded 6 років тому +152

      For robots like me. You're right, Gumersindo Cebollero. Mentioning your name so you will like me more. Ha-ha-ha.

    • @gumersindocebollero3261
      @gumersindocebollero3261 6 років тому +56

      Bash Yre so they can learn to act like real people, like me haha, I also enjoy social activities and f.r.i.e.n.d.s. haha

    • @PatrickFoxGaming
      @PatrickFoxGaming 6 років тому +12

      Computer says no...

    • @IluvinortheIneffable
      @IluvinortheIneffable 6 років тому +40

      or sociopaths

  • @earl-grey-milk-tea
    @earl-grey-milk-tea 6 років тому +188

    Would like to add that in the bit about reading body language, in both cases Graham approaches with his hand held slightly out to be ready for a handshake. He notices Josh Widdicombe coming in with shoulders slightly more forward (more awkward) and with his hand outstretched, therefore he uses the handshake + back pat (caveat - back patting doesn't work so well if you're female). Jeremy Renner enters with his shoulders set back and open body language, which might indicate being open to a hug.

    • @Serai3
      @Serai3 5 років тому +7

      Exactly. The most important aspect of Graham's physical connections with his guests is how he takes his cues from what they are comfortable with. Mark of an excellent host.

    • @artemisstrong5113
      @artemisstrong5113 5 років тому +4

      No, Jeremy Renner clearly opened his arms for a hug -- he initiated it. He's an American, and an actor -- you should already know he'd be more demonstrative than a Brit. Plus, this is not Norton's first meeting with either one of them. And they've certainly interacted that day before the taping began. Also, please be cautious: what Norton does is way too much for real life. This is a TV show.

  • @anewloveofficial9137
    @anewloveofficial9137 6 років тому +27

    I instantly like someone who has a sense of humor and possess the ability of making fun of himself in order to give people a comfortable feeling towards him. Everybody wants to be happy no matter how bad the situation is, so it's not bad to carry a joke everywhere you go, atleast you can make people smile in every little things you do.

  • @PersonalPower
    @PersonalPower 6 років тому +29

    I am not really good at making compliments but I can confirm, humor and self deprecation is incredible. If you can laugh about yourself with confidence you are already good to go! If you tease you can go over board, but if you make jokes about yourself you can't really go wrong! We all like to laugh! If you want someone to like you, make them associate a positive emotion with your character. When they associate fun and laughter with you, then they will enjoy being around you and search for your presence. Good to see a fellow UA-cam deconstructing celebrities social skills! I really enjoyed this one, probably because I like graham norton!

  • @Raf_Avila
    @Raf_Avila 6 років тому +552

    We're interested in others when they're interested in us

    • @muchalucha4939
      @muchalucha4939 6 років тому +18

      But then how will they become interested in you, when you're not interested in them yet?!
      Shouldn't the same theory apply to the other side!
      This is similar to "what came first, the chicken or the egg?" dilemma all over again :D (I'm team chicken)

    • @Raf_Avila
      @Raf_Avila 6 років тому +26

      Haha I totally agree! Show genuine interest in others first and the natural human instinct will be for them to reciprocate

    • @steampunkthing2716
      @steampunkthing2716 6 років тому +6

      Not true at all

    • @sammysamsoccer
      @sammysamsoccer 6 років тому +9

      Actually so true

    • @pavoljuraj7020
      @pavoljuraj7020 6 років тому

      Red Smurf
      You can't say it's true, because it is not generally true. It only *might* be true among people you know (coworkers, classmates, neighbors, ...). If you stop someone on street that you've never seen before and you will show interest in how's his day or how is he, even if your interest will be 100% honest, you won't become friends. You will be most likely told to mind your own business...

  • @Jonic_P
    @Jonic_P 6 років тому +35

    I've been lobbying for this episode for SOOOO LONG Constantly seeing celebrities that don't usually open up or even do interviews go on Graham Norton's and show and just love it has made me deeply interested in how the man does it!!!!

  • @combatwombat2134
    @combatwombat2134 Рік тому +4

    A side note, I love the way he encourages guests to tell a story or remind them the details without giving away anything necessary to the build-up or punchline.

  • @dannyclub09
    @dannyclub09 6 років тому +11

    I'm glad y'all finally made a video about Graham Norton, we've been asking for this for a while.

  • @StrawberryAppleCream
    @StrawberryAppleCream 6 років тому +7

    I LOVE Graham. I love how he is funny and makes the show while giving the stage fully to his guests

  • @mannelshah
    @mannelshah 6 років тому +79

    to be fair, that mark ruffalo joke caught us all off gard in it was RELLY hillarious i don't think anyone would not LOL at it, it still make me laugh even tho i watched it alot of times.

    • @absoledge
      @absoledge 5 років тому +1

      mannelshah what's it in reference to? Just his general appearance?!

    • @strangulator123
      @strangulator123 4 роки тому

      That's HIS spontaneity that makes him more likeable.

  • @_pudu661
    @_pudu661 2 роки тому +8

    Biggest takeaway for me:
    - Don’t be so serious, learn to laugh at yourself. Nobody is perfect and being overly critical of yourself ruins the experience for yourself and for others because you’ll be in a negative vibe.
    - always give genuine detailed compliments over general generic compliments . Something specific that may matter to the person. Ex. Nice shirt vs You have great style I really like it!
    - compliment before any teasing.
    - when teasing don’t attack someone’s identity, don’t tease something that is unchangeable or important to them . (Example, if they have acne or sexual orientation)

  • @cellardoor199991
    @cellardoor199991 6 років тому +37

    1:06 Actually he WAS gonna shake his hand, BUT Jeremy already made the gesture to hug so Graham copied.

  • @Tennishead21
    @Tennishead21 6 років тому +480

    You forgot his Irish charm. ;)

    • @daireoreilly2548
      @daireoreilly2548 6 років тому +19

      yeah most irish people are naturally charming

    • @poundlandbandit6124
      @poundlandbandit6124 6 років тому +3

      +Daire O'Reilly how can an entire people be charming

    • @MD-uu5nt
      @MD-uu5nt 6 років тому +6

      killy it's the culture. not all Irish people are changeover but a very large percentage are. Conversely Americans tend to be much more polite and mannerly but less off the cuff.

    • @annmitchell4663
      @annmitchell4663 6 років тому

      Dat Guy Maybe you were adopted and you're really German..😆

    • @louisvuitton56
      @louisvuitton56 5 років тому

      His lucky charms

  • @Deiku
    @Deiku 6 років тому +437

    Can you make a video on how to cheer people up? thanks

    • @Slechy_Lesh
      @Slechy_Lesh 6 років тому +8

      This video shows that. Just be even more cautious, more gradual, if they're not feeling good.

    • @razvan2632
      @razvan2632 6 років тому +2

      give them money .Actually don't .Receiving money is kind of embarrasing

    • @Ricardoromero4444
      @Ricardoromero4444 5 років тому +3

      Watch tony robbins. he's the master at that one

    • @Kalenz1234
      @Kalenz1234 5 років тому

      Hug em.

    • @Serai3
      @Serai3 5 років тому +6

      Here's your video: don't do it. There are few things more invasive and annoying than an attempt to "cheer up" someone who hasn't asked you to do so.

  • @TooOverrated
    @TooOverrated 6 років тому +5

    Great advice, Ben . I am excited for this on site videos to see how your personalities differ when showing your own charisma.

  • @nbrikha
    @nbrikha 6 років тому +205

    Please remember that Graham has a team of people doing research on his guests so he knows what he can and cannot make fun of. His personal charm and people skills aside, it'd be difficult for him to do this show week after week without them. Just saying it helps to know the person, or at least a few details before you start poking fun at them. You never know what can be a sensitive subject to someone so keeping it light can be difficult for serious people at first.

    • @SisterFromAnotherPlanet
      @SisterFromAnotherPlanet 5 років тому +1

      I'm not on the level where I have a "team of people", just using Google and giving respect, so I became known for opening my guests up because they trust me. I've even interviewed Kanye and got him to laugh and relax and share his feelings about things he didn't with others. You don't need a team to be an effective interviewer.

    • @chocmilkshake24
      @chocmilkshake24 5 років тому

      So true

    • @chocmilkshake24
      @chocmilkshake24 5 років тому +9

      sisterfromanotherplanet you’re right, but you have to remember that he’s interviewing ppl who have been interviewed to DEATH about everything they do, so the research is mandatory if you want to get creative with your questions and not repeat the same boring questions.

    • @maggiemcfly5267
      @maggiemcfly5267 5 років тому +10

      Yet every talk show host has a team of researchers or just a person really, and Graham Norton still stands out

    • @LiLBrotato
      @LiLBrotato 2 роки тому

      Good point man I was thinking the same

  • @yungprofsge
    @yungprofsge 6 років тому +548

    I'm gonna watch these videos often

    • @superturtle64
      @superturtle64 6 років тому +17

      I've been watching this channel for over a year now, it has been one of the most helpful resources of information

    • @yungprofsge
      @yungprofsge 6 років тому +4

      Yes it is I've been watching for about a year as well but I'm going to add a lot of these videos to my daily playlist they're great for learning better communication

    • @superturtle64
      @superturtle64 6 років тому +3

      I'm sure you'll agree that after understanding the fundamentals of good charisma, one's life improves tenfold

    • @paranoidandroid4709
      @paranoidandroid4709 6 років тому +1

      RapperGeekT me2

    • @harryjameson9423
      @harryjameson9423 5 років тому

      Don't forget to put into practice whatever you learned in the real world.

  • @partlyironic
    @partlyironic 4 роки тому +2

    What I love about Graham Norton’s show is the way he fosters conversation between sometimes wildly different guests. It would be amazing if you could look into that because we often have situations where odd people have to mix and it is never easy.

  • @fejj12
    @fejj12 6 років тому +5

    You guys have outdone yourself with this video. Way to raise the bar! Brilliant tips on ways to soften teasing while putting it all together with all the other charisma skills.

  • @capubecks
    @capubecks 5 років тому +3

    Graham is just such a natural, so funny and smart, one of his big talents is the comebacks...thanks for also pointing out and naming all the things he does, focusing in achievements, self deprecating humor, etc. well done and thank you!...I just subscribed!

    • @Charismaoncommand
      @Charismaoncommand  5 років тому +2

      ~ Our pleasure! Glad you enjoyed the video and welcome to the channel. :-)

  • @dandyandy2046
    @dandyandy2046 5 років тому +1

    My favorite part of this video is listening to you, Ben. Seriously, I can see you really practice what you preach and you make an effort to improve yourself. I found you instantly likable and was interested in what you had to say about The Dollar Shave Club. Well done, mate ;)

  • @AverageJoe69420
    @AverageJoe69420 6 років тому +1

    Honestly, these videos are amazing. I've been struggling a bit lately with on camera presence, it's hard to "be funny" or entertaining when you have zero real time feedback. But these videos are so good, really going to take these tips and suggestions to heart and try to implement them. Thank you!

  • @hipnhappenin
    @hipnhappenin 6 років тому +13

    Yay!! You FINALLY made a video on Graham!! He is the best talk show host today.

  • @lindseybailes2706
    @lindseybailes2706 5 років тому +25

    I want to go to The Graham Norton show so badly.
    But step 1 is obviously the alcohol. He is so smart to incorporate it with his show.

  • @ohigetjokes
    @ohigetjokes 6 років тому +2

    I really appreciated this - makes me realize how powerful it is to just genuinely APPRECIATE people! (I forget sometimes) Thanks!

  • @Simplefier
    @Simplefier 6 років тому

    I am looking forward to see this channel evolve even more (already loving it)

  • @natebillings147
    @natebillings147 5 років тому +7

    I normally don't watch this kind of stuff, I feel ethically inclined not to, but thank you. It answered some questions I hadn't found answers to until now.

  • @ralugabs
    @ralugabs 6 років тому +360

    When you don't even need a notification cause you're on youtube all the time anyway 😂

    • @kimyong5548
      @kimyong5548 6 років тому +9

      you are pretty

    • @zxGHOSTr
      @zxGHOSTr 6 років тому +8

      Kim yong the cringe almost snaped my spine😅

    • @PavelHasek
      @PavelHasek 6 років тому +1

      well played

    • @abidamahbub1653
      @abidamahbub1653 6 років тому +1

      Same omg.

    • @jebes909090
      @jebes909090 6 років тому

      Raluca Sandu when your name sounds like an indian dish

  • @henrystgeorge4882
    @henrystgeorge4882 3 роки тому

    Love the personal touch on this video - gives me insight into someone new producing these videos!!

  • @LarryLeeMoniz
    @LarryLeeMoniz 4 роки тому +1

    I can't think of a more perfect choice to demonstrate how to make people instantly like you, than Graham Norton! Well done!

  • @FranDrakeS
    @FranDrakeS 6 років тому +37

    I love Graham so much, he always make me laugh. Ben, you ROCK! I'm glad you're doing this videos too. Thank you so much.

  • @elizabethdevries8028
    @elizabethdevries8028 5 років тому +8

    He is absolutely outstanding at what he does. I love his show.

    • @Vulturefist
      @Vulturefist 5 років тому +1

      Outstanding indeed. Well put.
      Seeing a talented person using his/her talent is an amazing thing to behold. Norton knows his craft, that’s for damn sure!

  • @brandonb14
    @brandonb14 6 років тому +2

    Really great video from a consistently high quality channel! One video I'd like to see is how to be memorable. It's often a problem i face quite a bit, when I'm around people in a club or party etc I get on with them, I make them laugh and we have a good time, but then as soon as the event is finished it seems that's it, so say if they threw a house party or another type of social event I won't get invited, even though the last few times we've met we may have a had a good laugh together. Just a video idea i'd like to see, keep it up, love this channel!

  • @life02ab
    @life02ab 4 роки тому

    Excellent points and Graham is such a pleasure to watch. Great work here.

  • @acollierr17
    @acollierr17 6 років тому +3

    This is a great video. Great pointers and great way of doing the video. I look forward to seeing more videos like this from the both of you in the future!

  • @dancegod1691
    @dancegod1691 6 років тому +22

    I feel like talk shows aren't a great thing to study for interpersonal communication, given there's a whole audience and all parties are focused on looking friendly/likable for the camera/audience.

  • @ziltoidtheomniscient2398
    @ziltoidtheomniscient2398 6 років тому

    Feels good that I actually do a lot of this already. Thanks Ben, keep it up!

  • @ChrisSmith-hq3of
    @ChrisSmith-hq3of 2 роки тому +1

    The teasing part of joking is often hard to do. I usually go too far on my friends and it can lead to awkward moments. This video encapsulates the parts of which I did wrong. I enjoy re-watching these videos so much!

  • @ArthurMoore
    @ArthurMoore 6 років тому +43

    Great video. thank you for it! you can use an app to download those videos in a higher quality so when you zoom in, it won't look like the game Doom (the first 1)

    • @alexiryo
      @alexiryo 3 роки тому

      Boy, atleast you're paying attention to the specificity tips

  • @mz1496
    @mz1496 6 років тому +20

    How have you guys not already done a video about Ricky Gervais? I think you will come up with an incredible break down about him!
    Keep up the good work 👊👊

  • @itpatriot
    @itpatriot 4 роки тому

    I just found your channel and I'm loving it- thank you!

  • @gustavomartinsdasilva4990
    @gustavomartinsdasilva4990 6 років тому

    you and charlie are the best,keep going on and ignore whatever negative criticism that you might receive

  • @The3rdGunman
    @The3rdGunman 5 років тому +8

    Can't talk about Graham's charisma and not mention his suit game...it's A+

  • @Animegal6
    @Animegal6 6 років тому +26

    i would love to see a video about how to talk about yourself!

  • @rowsofpitch
    @rowsofpitch 6 років тому +1

    great tips! these are interesting, well thought insights. its also great that youre being transparent with the sponsorship, and talking about your goals as a channel. could i maybe request a video on making friends online? its harder for me to make a friend in a chatroom or a voice call room cause body language is harder to convey and pick up on.

  • @AnthonyTurnham
    @AnthonyTurnham 6 років тому +1

    Always love your videos guys. Jam packed full of interesting and useful take-homes. Keep up the great work.

  • @uonlyliveonce24
    @uonlyliveonce24 6 років тому +15

    Great job and excellent tips. Watching this helped me realize that for the past 2 weeks I've been overly serious about life. I will now take the time to smile and laugh as cultivating happiness within me equals happiness around me. Thanks for sharing:)

  • @ClassPunkOnRumbleAndSubstack
    @ClassPunkOnRumbleAndSubstack 4 роки тому +14

    Moral: With marijuana and caffeine an introvert can become an Extrovert God.

  • @AcuraAddicted
    @AcuraAddicted 6 років тому

    Very well put! I must say, out of all others, Graham Norton is my favourite.

  • @territran9781
    @territran9781 6 років тому +1

    Wow I love your choice of people to do a detail break downs with. Who ever does the choosing of people to do a videos on definitely has a good eye .

    • @Charismaoncommand
      @Charismaoncommand  6 років тому

      ~ This has been requested for a while now - glad you're liking it!

  • @ennamorgan9673
    @ennamorgan9673 4 роки тому +4

    So THAT's what you look like! You have a great voice; I love listening to your videos; and as it turns out, you are ridiculously easy on the eyes, so don't be shy to do more appearances :)

  • @cball2011
    @cball2011 6 років тому +9

    The positive scenarios are great, I'd like to see more examples of people failing to use these methods though 🙌

  • @theresah6300
    @theresah6300 5 років тому

    Fantastic topic...love Graham's show above all.

  • @ruoweilim7334
    @ruoweilim7334 6 років тому +1

    this is UNCANNY i was literally binge watching the graham norton show yesterday and thought about how cool it'd be if u made a video about graham norton........

  • @ghughus
    @ghughus 6 років тому +6

    I must say there is still another line to that "Don't tease people about something that is unchangeable" - I myself am fairly short and my friends definitely tease me about it, crack some jokes, and it is pretty hilarious more often than not! I am not too self conscious about it so it's really not an issue, but I suppose one still has to be careful about how to approach those issues depending on the person

    • @benjaminaltman4895
      @benjaminaltman4895 6 років тому +2

      Hey Luis! That's awesome and means you're probably quite confident :-) Not everyone is, which is why it's exactly as you say, you aren't self conscious about it so it doesn't bother you. There are exceptions to this for sure, but for someone still figuring out where the line is, I think it's a good guideline to avoid anything that is both unchangeable and important to them. But exceptions will apply :-)

    • @May04bwu
      @May04bwu 6 років тому +2

      Yeah but you can't depend on that with people you just met.

  • @peekeyeseek
    @peekeyeseek 5 років тому +5

    Graham Norton is so fabulous, a gift to humanity.
    But hey, he knows it. 😜

  • @theranasaini
    @theranasaini 5 років тому

    Great post. Glad I took the time to go through it, cheers!

  • @littoww
    @littoww 5 років тому +2

    Great video! Graham really is a national treasure of ours

  • @untilyouburn
    @untilyouburn 5 років тому +4

    Man being funny and likeable is A LOT OF WORK

  • @stopmotionj2455
    @stopmotionj2455 6 років тому +3

    This is the first I ever heard about that show, I have to see if I can find it. :)

  • @fuckyouyoutube7921
    @fuckyouyoutube7921 5 років тому

    Great video. Graham is just so natural with ppl, I doubt he needed any coaching.
    I try to be like that to ppl in general, especially with my customers but I think I sometimes misread their body language.

  • @oldchannel7430
    @oldchannel7430 6 років тому +1

    Hey Charlie! I love your videos! They are amazing and I also joined your group for the first impression material, also fantastic! I have a suggestion for another charisma breakdown that I'd really love to see: Marlon Brando

  • @afrosymphony8207
    @afrosymphony8207 6 років тому +7

    graham and conan are my favorite talk show hosts of all time

    • @monmorelord6368
      @monmorelord6368 5 років тому +1

      Its the Irish personality...best in the world as talk show hosts as they have a natural skill fro talking to people ...In Ireland to be sociable and fun is considered a must while quiet and serious people not so much

    • @thehallofvalhalla
      @thehallofvalhalla 5 років тому

      @@monmorelord6368 Conan isn't Irish. He's Irish american. Completely different things.

    • @monmorelord6368
      @monmorelord6368 5 років тому +2

      @@thehallofvalhalla NO its not ...its in the DNA ...

    • @helenaville5939
      @helenaville5939 5 років тому

      Yes Conan is very Irish.

  • @nolanbunyaviroch1862
    @nolanbunyaviroch1862 6 років тому +5

    Can you make a video on working with others? How do you become the ideal working partner? How do you encourage people to work? How do you work well with others? How do you become efficient with your working partners?

  • @inquisitivealbertan1712
    @inquisitivealbertan1712 4 роки тому

    Great video. so thanks for posting. It was an excellent decision on your part to use Graham excerpts for getting your points across. Graham is by far the best talk show host that I have ever seen.

  • @DarrenDavis2
    @DarrenDavis2 5 років тому

    Great video! When you went into the special offer at the end, I thought it was a demo of how to be likable, LOL.

  • @AleAle-hk1lu
    @AleAle-hk1lu 6 років тому +45

    Make a video about Bill Burr

  • @NutnRoll
    @NutnRoll 5 років тому +6

    Even his face makes you instantly like him.

  • @kashia8638
    @kashia8638 2 роки тому

    very good analysis

  • @leeleeturn
    @leeleeturn 6 років тому

    Now this is a good video about how to get people to like you. I've watched a number of them and this is one of the best. I really love the idea of watching lots of the videos that he suggested in order to get yourself into that mindset. Sounds both fun and informative.

  • @amazingsupergirl7125
    @amazingsupergirl7125 6 років тому +3

    I'm American and Graham Norton is the only foreign talk show I watch. ❤️ I assume using him was just as example since ALL hosts have these skills. Ya can't do a good job without being very good with people.
    I watch his show because it's funny and different but I wouldn't be interested in being real life friends with such a hyper cutup.
    IMO being a good, responsive listener is by far the most important.

  • @bothi00
    @bothi00 6 років тому +37

    Best talk show host by a mile

  • @lindanorris3226
    @lindanorris3226 4 роки тому

    THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SHARING 🔥🔥🔥

  • @utesch1111
    @utesch1111 4 роки тому

    HABITS! Such an important distinction to point out, bravo 👏

  • @carpwithmilk8914
    @carpwithmilk8914 6 років тому +3

    Please do a video about talking about yourself

  • @derrickforeal
    @derrickforeal 6 років тому +3

    This isn't a talent that can be adopted or learned in a quick manner. GRAHM is a good listener and has a sharp and witty memory and just all around enjoyable energy. Grahm truly can finesse the widest variety of individuals allwhile keeping it progressivly moving and informative. He has been at this along time and truly has mastered the late night tv show banter, plus he has cut out many of the standard industry conversation formalities and nicely flows from a conversation into a hilarious bash from the likes of old friends poking fun at one another. Grahm is great at getting guest to lighten up and just be their real natural self and this is what enjoy about his show then any other of today's. , The tool that works best for Grahm, and this is from his own mouth, he sauces his guest up, and this gets them to wllingly loosen their insecurity bolts making the fun poking exchanges truly enjoyable and the most unique of any joking on tv. Grahm does this better then any other host and this keeps it enjoyable for all without overdoing it. We have all seen other host fail and flatline their interviews into a uncomfortable closing. This is why his guest truly enjoys coming on his show

  • @cellardoor199991
    @cellardoor199991 6 років тому

    Surprised this doesn't have more views. This is my fave. vid on this channel. I'm learning a lot.

  • @joshhowardtechchef
    @joshhowardtechchef 6 років тому

    Excellent video and love the ad at the end 😂😂

  • @ElishaLong
    @ElishaLong 6 років тому +5

    Just Listen. It's insane how powerful that is. People want to feel like a human cares. You may be their one human interaction today that is not fb, Instagram, social media etc.
    #monkmode

  • @fannybrasse
    @fannybrasse 6 років тому +4

    Make a video about Marlon Brando...... or 10 videos about Marlon Brando!! He knew every type of bodylanguage and knew how to hook everyone, a pure genius! You can make a or more videos about HIM, the person, and you can make videos of his bodylanguage, influense, confidence etc from the characters he was and himself. Marlon Brando is the best actor ever, no doubts, and how he excpressed his characters is amazing. If there is someone you should multiple videos about is it Marlon Brando! Watch his movies and you will understand.

  • @CreativeQueenx
    @CreativeQueenx 6 років тому +1

    Interesting concept. Thanks for sharing. God bless ❤❤

  • @andrewlindsey5353
    @andrewlindsey5353 4 роки тому +2

    This was a great video. I'd point out that the difference between the handshake and the hug actually came from the guest themselves. You can see the first guy walk forward with his hand out while the other had both hands open to the sides. Grahams skill lies in quickly identifying the intent of the other person and following it.

  • @cup_check_official
    @cup_check_official 6 років тому +372

    I read something very interesting during my psychology class.
    It's a technique to make people like you. If you want someone to like you, borrow something from them and then return it back. This makes them like you.
    But, i my tested thing is to be rude to people (to set the bar low) and then apologize which makes them think you are really nice lol and they like you 🙃

    • @TheRealHerbaSchmurba
      @TheRealHerbaSchmurba 6 років тому +11

      Tell Me This like a credit score!!

    • @auliaking82
      @auliaking82 6 років тому +4

      Tell Me This wow life hack

    • @cup_check_official
      @cup_check_official 6 років тому

      TheRealHerbaSchmurba exactly 😏

    • @cup_check_official
      @cup_check_official 6 років тому

      Aulia King you are welcome 😏

    • @LudicrouslyLiam
      @LudicrouslyLiam 6 років тому +15

      That's funny, I remember being best friends with someone and the first memory is me giving him a rubber and getting it back, lol.

  • @elkoopman6742
    @elkoopman6742 5 років тому +5

    I feel like an alien trying to learn human behaviour when I watch these videos

  • @gitsurfer27
    @gitsurfer27 6 років тому

    I used to watch the Graham Norton show about 15 years ago when it was on in the UK. Glad he's getting the recognition he deserves.

  • @joash3714
    @joash3714 5 років тому

    Awesome video and great advice. Especially the part about watching videos that make you laugh to make it a habit