For anyone recovering at the moment - this is what SAVED ME (I was recovering from a relapse over 2017/18 and now I'm in a good place agains 1. You won't get anywhere unless you challenge things. Sure you can gain weight without eating any of your fear foods or challenging any of your behaviours, like when you eat or how you eat etc but that is NOT recovery. It's only when you start to break out of your comfort zone when you realise that they are completely irrational. Why should I wait until 1 to eat lunch if I'm hungry now? Why shouldn't I have 2 cakes in a day, or chocolate spread with my breakfast? You start to recognise the difference between what YOU want and what you eating disorder wants. It is hard, it does make you feel guilty, but each time you do it, you feel less guilty. I swear if you challenge your behaviours, you will be able to think about food in a healthy way again. There are certain brain/body mechanisms that change when you gain weight, like thinking about food less and better digestion etc etc but you can't fully recover and be free unless you change the psychology as well. I promise promise promise you, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. You CAN live without the thoughts and there will come a day when you consider your eating disorder behind you 💖💖💖😊
Needed this today! Spent valentines weekend with my chef boyfriend and he's getting me to try so many fear foods! So scary and guilt ridden but 100% worth it! ❤
YAY the oats are back 😉 I remember watching you with your overnight oats in your very first videos! I have learnt so much from your amazing videos and am so so happy to see how far you've come since then! I loved hearing that there will never be a time where you feel ready for recovery because it's so true. Our ED will always make some sort of excuse for why it's not the right time to gain weight or challenge certain fears etc but true freedom comes when we ignore that and push through the fear regardless! Love you lots xx
🙋♀️ yes, on Friday I agreed to have a few weeks back at the Day Unit, to prevent being a inpatient again🙄 then was told I can start following Tues.... "oh thats quick..em could it be like week after or..."? Reply was "why wait"? So this Tues it is😬☺ 💞
I'm so proud of you for not waiting and taking the steps to pursue recovery! I'm right here rooting for you and the journey is tough but the outcome will be 10 million times better then staying stuck with this shitty illness
I really appreciate how straight to the point you are with these videos. I keep getting stuck in the same cycle of being motivated to recover, then after a day or two falling back into old patterns because I fear the change. I’ve gotten to the point where I feel so sorry for myself and feel like giving up on recovery. But your videos seem to pull me back in the right direction and give the advice I need to hear. I’m going to keep going forward no matter how many times I fall back into old patterns. I’m making that promise here today.
I can relate to this. One night I couldn't sleep bc my stomach was empty after not eating anything for 2 days. Then I started to watch recovery vids to distract myself. And there was a point when I decided: I will eat. And I ate. It was such a wonderful feeling! Freedom 😅 But the day after I felt guilty and shamed. And now here I am. Still in the trap of my ED. I feel there's no way out for me 😥
It is so generous of you to share all that you do. The perspectives in this video are so helpful, and your personal stories so relatable. Thank you for sharing with so many of us.
Thank you beautiful.. I really don’t think we can hear these truths often enough, in recovery or relapse. Coming from you makes it THAT much more motivating to take in and think- maybe I’m underestimating myself, maybe I’ve actually got a shot at life xoxox
I can't thank you enough for your videos. Everything you've said is exactly what I was feeling. I am in my 50's and have been struggling for several years and always trying to be perfect. I learned about Opposite Action but I never really understood it until you explained it so well. I can't thank you enough. I think you've saved my life. I am actually sticking to my meal plan for the first time in a long time. THANK YOU :)
I really needed this today, I felt myself wanting to relapse for that quick fix, cause I really hate feeling uncomfortable in my skin. But this was actually helpful. I'm probably gonna need to watch this again. Thank you so much.💜
Mariel Landona if it helps KEEP watching. I feel like I was so repetitive in my recovery with things that helped. Basically anything that snapped me out of wanting that in the moment quick fix, & connected me a bit to the bigger picture of what am I actually doing with my life? Does this behaviour serve me long term for who I want to be? So yeh, a couple of vlogs & physically writing out lists whilst I ate was a great help 😘
So very true Meg!!!!! I have been recovered from Anorexia for about 10years, not a day goes past when I still hear that critic’s voice, the guilt over my eating/body/exercise. The difference now is the voice is not as loud as it used to be. Also if I listen to that critic and act on that guilt, is that really going to allow me to be the best nurse/friend/daughter/sister/aunt that I can be??? The answer will always be no!!! Will listening to the critic allow me to travel around the world - NO!!!! So there is no choice I can’t listen to the guilt!!!
I think it’s interesting that I watched this today while struggling with butter 😀 Funny how things come together in life sometimes. You are just a beacon of light 💗
I love your videos so much . I’ve always found them so helpful. I started watching you long ago before I even started recovery and you made me feel like it was worth it. In the hospital I would always think of things you said to help me.. couple months later now I can watch your videos when they’re posted and they’re are as helpful as always. I’m so thankful for you, your channel, and your consistency !! 💜
The Judge 😂😂 sorry not laughing at you, but I know the exact level of fear. Which you’ll always have if you always avoid... it helps me to think things like “do I think it’s ok for other people to eat?” (Don’t let your head jump in there with “but you’re different!). “Do I want to be that person that can’t eat certain foods?”. & also for perspective, “is it really that important. Will I look back10 years from now & think thank god I managed to avoid butter like it was anthrax?” Also, this isn’t to say it’ll be easy or comfortable straight away, but with time & repetition & not compensating around it it will become easier 😘😘
@@megsyrecovery191 I don't mind the hilarity of it as I'm a stage where I see it is very outre. I often do have to look at others around me to realise that no one cares about butter as I do. They go about their business regardless. To them, it's like any other innocuous food, like oil, bread or the like. Hey, at least I don't refer to it as 'poison' anymore.
needed that so much right now!! thank you so much!♥ can you make a video about how to stay motivated and positive in an ED clinic? and do you have tips for how to not get triggered by other girls who barely eat? And how do you deal with the thought of being not thin/bad enough to start recovery?
Av_ 2003 oooh I think I did a video called not ill enough or something, one of the early ones. Also I haven’t been IP for 10 years, it’s probably changed a lot. Not sure if Be the best to cover that 🙈
Don’t know you but trying to help, try an old channel by Valerie camai , find it and although she hasn’t uploaded for over a hear, it’s still there, and when she did upload she covered almost that exact thing in detail and is excellent with advice as she is now completely recovered. Look it up and go back to look through the very early videos she put on when she was in and out of inpatient constantly. Hope this helps
I love you, Megsy!!!You are SO HELPFUL!!! I would love you to know how much I appreciate your work ♥♥♥ you are the best youtuber and the most beautiful and nice person please do not stop ♥♥♥ And I also love your cats :D ♥
So challenging daily is recommended, but 1. What if you don't crave said food? 2. Don't want the same thing day-to-day? 3. Unable to obtain what you want when one wants and then not want when you have? Thank you
Michaela Králiková yes I totally get you... thing is your frustration & irritation won’t last forever. It’s just there the first few times you do it & then it passes & butter or whatever becomes a normal, every day, stress free thing to have. Whereas your ED I imagine will have quite a large impact on yours & your family’s life. I used to say to Bren “look this weeks going to be hard, sorry if I’m irritable, it won’t be forever”
Meg, I absolutely love your videos but wanted to ask you a hard question. Have you ever asked yourself what is hiding behind your anxiety? I do understand that anxiety response is automatic and that you need to retrain your brain to think and behave differently around the food but I am wondering if you have ever had an opportunity to address possible traumas in your life and self-esteem issues outside of the cognitive behavior therapy that have lead you in the first place to develop an eating disorder? I think in one of your videos you mentioned your parents got divorced when you were younger and I assume this is something that has also affected you deeply in your life and possibly triggered an eating disorder. When I looked down into myself I realized my whole family is prone to mental health issues like depression, anxiety and addiction and that there was been some trauma transferred from generation to generation, also a lot of abuse and messy relationships. My own mother has a disorder relationship with food herself and it got passed onto me and my brother (what if I get hungry and we get run out of the food, food equals love). I do understand you might not be willing to talk about deeper stuff and I appreciate and understand that but these are things many of people with eating disorders struggle with and have to deal with them at some point. I am sure you had also some trauma work during previous hospitalizations as well and some family counseling but these are things also important to recovery that people need to hear about. My eating disorder recovery started when I started to deal with family and relationship issues, food abstinence and recovery came second.
You are so in tune with your illness and I have always been told I am too. It is good to know what you have to do I guess it is just the implementation stage that makes it harder haha. Whatever happened with your rings girly?! Much love. X
Maybe they were too big? I noticed too. I wore mine 2 sizes too big for a year because I couldn’t bear to take off my wedding band for 2 days to get it resized
Hi i was wanting to ask about whether you had the fear when you had a big weight gain in what feels like a way to fast time period and then feel like you will just will never stop gaining and become massive. If you have any help it would be amazing as im struggling to keep fighting as i frel so much fear and ultimately im fighting ED (name i call my anorexia) but i feel like no matter what I try to tell myself the thoughts are becoming more and more stronger and I am getting so exhausted from fighting ED mentally each day. Also you are a inspiration to me to keep fighting and face my food fears and ED
Hey Meg! Do you ever find that when you reflect on your illness you get caught in a downward spiral? I find that whenever I run across a picture or memory of my illness, I can’t stop thinking about it until I’ve gone down a rabbit hole of nostalgia and I start to think I was better then or I “miss” my ed.
so today was my birthday, it was awful, depression and my ed have robbed me of the ability to enjoy life. but i decided to fight hard today and managed to eat a sqaure of lint chocolate and salmon and swede chips for dinner. i wasdoing so well until i looked at how much fat is in salmon, now i cant cope. ive gone from 6/7g of fat a day normally to 25g today. i feel so gross. i managed to eat more but failed to eat 'well'/ in my macro ratios . i cant get over it hours later, i feel sick and greasy and gross. one high fat day cant make much difference can it? i know its dumb but u am scared i will wake up flabby now. sorry i just don't know who to ask for reassurance
You are awlays talking about your husband in a very nice way. I believe he IS a very nice man and also very intelligent and honest. And this man loves you. Do you know what I mean? Why does he love you? He loves you because you are also nice, intelligent, beautiful, honest, patient......etc woman. May be you could write down into your notebook too :-)....I like the idea you are talking about that one does not have to deserve to be loved by others or to be loved by himself or herself. I discuss it often with my psychologist. Last time I was not able to tell her any single think why I think the other people love me. Because now, I am sick, not very beautiful in my skinny body, not able to enjoy sports, going out (I am not physically fit, have problems with my legs) but still there are some people around me, who like me, enjoy my company for "no reason"....may be I am not so bad?..is there something on me which other appreciate?....may be..
Hey one of my best friends is also in recovery from anorexia and she compares herself to me on bad days and she will say things like 'how do you get so skinny" "you are so skinny". I have no idea to respond when she says these things. Do you have any advise?
Do you think we can face those fears and tolerate these uncomforts at job or school? I have already gone in treatment many many times, inpatient, day program, etc. And now, even if I have a long way to go regarding weigh and freedom, I will try to go back to work soon and hope I will be able to go forward and feel less obset while I am actively making efforts to recover. I don't know if I am irrealistic.... anyways, I'll give a try because I want to be around people and change my mind and experiment something else than eating disorder as a central subject in my life. By the way, on your list, you forgot Beyonce and Stevee!!!! xxx Lots of love (sorry for my English)
Dominique L. I managed it at work. Some days were very hard & sometimes I had to go home, but over time it’s gotten so much easier & now I’m generally fine at work. Recovery always came first for me 😘
Please, I have a guestin - problém. I do not have a big problém with eating anything, I am also happy seeing higher number on the scale. But what I hate is that - I am not kidding, but I have a huge belly all the time. It is like most of my weight go there, plus I am always - not only after meal but also in the morning, bloated. If I see some pictures where people show how they are "bloated" I can say they look like I am not bloated. In fact I have this problém long term - might be because I have a long term ups downs ED. It is going to pass? Will I have normal body again? Ok I can see I also have some "materiál" on my legs, arms, but the most of it is around my belly (supported with bloating) and my face, but I especially do not like it at the waist part. How to cope with this? Is i normal? I read that it is but still I hate my belly. I want to look normal in bikini in summer, feel comfortable in legins, jeans...without that HUGE belly- stomach. I am also often constipated :-(...thansk for any advice
Kenya check out the channel "follow the intuition" she has loads of videos on bloating or digestive problems in recovery - I have this too but always feel better after watching one of her videos. its a normal part of recovery - horrible but normal. i agree though most " bloated" pictures i've seen i think " what are you talking about?? you don't know what real bloating is!"
thank you so much, in fact my problém went a little bit better during the last week, I try not to focus on it so much a may be my body starts to get used to the situation. I also use probiotics. To stop chew gums lelps too (my bad habit from "that time" - I could use a whole packet or more in one day)....and yes, agreeeeeee - they do not know what bloating is :-D, totally agree
Does your perfectionism cross over towards your creative/artsy hobbies as well as it does food rules and work? Ugh! I love decorating and painting, but I get frustrated when the colors don't "feel right" or things just dont look harmonized enough. It would be ahhhhmazing if one day I could tolerate sitting with my fear foods, AND sitting with a fugly green poop colored wall. I just don't remember always needing things perfect (to the extent this need feels now) until my ED came along. Idk! I just hope I'm not compensating for challenging my food fears by repainting the same wall over and over. Or banging 8 million holes in the wall because the picture is now TOO centered lol
Michelle Walsh yeh so been there. We just got new curtains that I don’t like & I can’t stop thinking about it 😆 mine definitely got better with weight gain, I’ve relaxed off a bit. But self expectations is something I really need to work on at the moment 🙈 I could do a video about it maybe. Although it doesn’t make loads of sense to me still
Do you go through phases with food? This is my latest.#peanutbutter on #sourdoughbread.(and yes, with butter as well!) , honestly, a number of years ago I don't think I'd have let myself have this for breakfast. I didn't even let myself keep #bread in the house. Why? No doubt it was some bullshit story about what I thought I "should" eat instead. For all reasons #dietculture of course!. These days I'm more relaxed about allowing myself to have the things that I crave😊👏 when I crave them. Which means that this week is peanut butter toast but next week, maybe something else? Who knows . But I'm ok with that.letting go of all the "should's" and the restrictive and fearful mindset around food has been liberating. I won't say it's always been easy, it can be difficult to reprogram beliefs which were at least two decades old by the time I started questioning them. Nonetheless ,it has been worthwhile undertaking in my intuitive eating
Jami Gustafsson hey, yeh it’s a really good topic, & something which changes drastically as I get iller / weller. I’ve been meaning to do something about relationships, it’s just awkward haha 😂😂😂😂
amazing!! could you share some tips that helped you to spend money on yourself??and specially in food??what does you psico suggest you about this issue??THANKS for everything!! =)
Ujué Fresán ooooh I actually did a video about this. I can’t remember the name of it but I drank a Costa frostino in the car... & this is terrible but I think I can even remember it’s a blueberry cheesecake fronstino. I think I had a chicken sandwich too. Anyway, it’s very similar to the food stuff honestly. You can’t wait until it feels easy, or until you don’t have rules around money in place, because that will never happen. You brain is wired around this well practice behaviour & belief of not spending money. So for me there was a lot of forcing it, making myself, feeling guilty & doing it anyway. Also, weight gain helped me massively!!! I just naturally chilled as I gained, without having to do anything
Love video again, what did you say about anxiety, it is the same my psychologist said and what I have read. It is a part of KBT method. I learned it when recovering from my OCD - eg. I feel dirty, I have to wash my hands.....(with no real reason) and if I go and wash my hands I only feed my illness, becasuse the relief is only short - time. If I wait for some time, the anxiety will pass somehow...I think it is the same with ED or whatever other addiction or so, like the alcoholist "only have" a sip of wine....., this works in everythink you are used to do as a short time relief (you are lying to your self saying - it just now for today, next time it will be better, no...its not if you do not stop it). Thank you for your explanation, it really - scientifically and psychologically based.
But you are thin you look good in your clothes - I feel like my body looks horrible in clothes and cannot even begin the think about say wearing jeans or tucking in my top
Lisa Kulak it helped me a lot to change my style a bit & but clothes I feel comfy in, but my psychologist also always says to be careful not to body avoid. There’s absolutely no reason why you can’t wear jeans!
Lisa Kulak I'm the same...I'm trying to see what feels better but also trying with jeans. Not too tight but trying still . I'm trying to change a bit my style also and feel ok with it
Have you ever came across a Rachel’s road to recovery channel It’s pretty disturbing to watch and also I think it’s a scam of some sort She presents anorexia as it’s a sort of like a cancer that you have no control over and so many people surround her, taking care of her and I think kind of enabling her I find this channel very misleading and irritating
lena jazuk I’m not sure, but there’s actually very few channels which are helpful for me at my stage. I pretty much exclusively watch people who are recovered - properly!! Not part recovered but you’re watching thinking “really?” 🤔 my favourites are Tabitha Farrar, follow the intuition, what Mia did next & damn the diets. That’s nothing against other channels. Just personally for me & the nature of my illness & stage these are the most helpful. Do you watch them? Also, if something doesn’t sit right with you, unfollow!!! It’s nothing personal to them. Everyone’s individual 😘😘😘
Megsy Recovery I follow them as well it’s just mind blowing what some channels share and preach I’m not sure about What Mia .. I have watched all of her videos and didn’t get really understand how she recovered
You actually saved someone from the verge of considering suicide as an escape. I rarely say this, but I love you.
Jm Macar 🙏 hope they’re ok!!
Thank you for letting her know
I hope you are ok❤️
For anyone recovering at the moment - this is what SAVED ME
(I was recovering from a relapse over 2017/18 and now I'm in a good place agains
1. You won't get anywhere unless you challenge things. Sure you can gain weight without eating any of your fear foods or challenging any of your behaviours, like when you eat or how you eat etc but that is NOT recovery. It's only when you start to break out of your comfort zone when you realise that they are completely irrational. Why should I wait until 1 to eat lunch if I'm hungry now? Why shouldn't I have 2 cakes in a day, or chocolate spread with my breakfast? You start to recognise the difference between what YOU want and what you eating disorder wants. It is hard, it does make you feel guilty, but each time you do it, you feel less guilty. I swear if you challenge your behaviours, you will be able to think about food in a healthy way again. There are certain brain/body mechanisms that change when you gain weight, like thinking about food less and better digestion etc etc but you can't fully recover and be free unless you change the psychology as well.
I promise promise promise you, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. You CAN live without the thoughts and there will come a day when you consider your eating disorder behind you 💖💖💖😊
This is just what I needed to hear. Can’t sleep at the moment as my brain won’t switch off. You and Tabitha Farrar are keeping me fighting 💕
“Feel shit and do it anyway “
This is gold! I repeat this all day 💖
Same, I live by all the amazing sayings.
Needed this today! Spent valentines weekend with my chef boyfriend and he's getting me to try so many fear foods! So scary and guilt ridden but 100% worth it! ❤
Madeline Wilson yayyyy for being in life with your bf 🙌😘
Madeline Wilson I
YAY the oats are back 😉 I remember watching you with your overnight oats in your very first videos! I have learnt so much from your amazing videos and am so so happy to see how far you've come since then! I loved hearing that there will never be a time where you feel ready for recovery because it's so true. Our ED will always make some sort of excuse for why it's not the right time to gain weight or challenge certain fears etc but true freedom comes when we ignore that and push through the fear regardless! Love you lots xx
Caitlin Amy yeh exactly, & once you’re doing better you’ll be glad you did it even though you didn’t feel 100% ready 😘
🙋♀️ yes, on Friday I agreed to have a few weeks back at the Day Unit, to prevent being a inpatient again🙄 then was told I can start following Tues.... "oh thats quick..em could it be like week after or..."? Reply was "why wait"? So this Tues it is😬☺ 💞
I'm so proud of you for not waiting and taking the steps to pursue recovery! I'm right here rooting for you and the journey is tough but the outcome will be 10 million times better then staying stuck with this shitty illness
@@caitlinamy1422 aww bless you sweetheart, your comment me so much! Thank you 🥂 & rooting for you too💪💞
I really appreciate how straight to the point you are with these videos. I keep getting stuck in the same cycle of being motivated to recover, then after a day or two falling back into old patterns because I fear the change. I’ve gotten to the point where I feel so sorry for myself and feel like giving up on recovery. But your videos seem to pull me back in the right direction and give the advice I need to hear. I’m going to keep going forward no matter how many times I fall back into old patterns. I’m making that promise here today.
I can relate to this. One night I couldn't sleep bc my stomach was empty after not eating anything for 2 days. Then I started to watch recovery vids to distract myself. And there was a point when I decided: I will eat. And I ate. It was such a wonderful feeling! Freedom 😅
But the day after I felt guilty and shamed. And now here I am. Still in the trap of my ED.
I feel there's no way out for me 😥
It is so generous of you to share all that you do. The perspectives in this video are so helpful, and your personal stories so relatable. Thank you for sharing with so many of us.
Thank you beautiful..
I really don’t think we can hear these truths often enough, in recovery or relapse. Coming from you makes it THAT much more motivating to take in and think- maybe I’m underestimating myself, maybe I’ve actually got a shot at life xoxox
Tia Charlotte of course you have. Just don’t give in to the temptations or the uncomfortable feelings 😘😘😘
I can't thank you enough for your videos. Everything you've said is exactly what I was feeling. I am in my 50's and have been struggling for several years and always trying to be perfect. I learned about Opposite Action but I never really understood it until you explained it so well. I can't thank you enough. I think you've saved my life. I am actually sticking to my meal plan for the first time in a long time. THANK YOU :)
I tried Nutella for the first time two days ago and now I'm eating some everyday lol it's soooo good
pink custard that’s happens to me all the time when I try a new food
I really needed this today, I felt myself wanting to relapse for that quick fix, cause I really hate feeling uncomfortable in my skin. But this was actually helpful. I'm probably gonna need to watch this again. Thank you so much.💜
Mariel Landona if it helps KEEP watching. I feel like I was so repetitive in my recovery with things that helped. Basically anything that snapped me out of wanting that in the moment quick fix, & connected me a bit to the bigger picture of what am I actually doing with my life? Does this behaviour serve me long term for who I want to be?
So yeh, a couple of vlogs & physically writing out lists whilst I ate was a great help 😘
No one has ever described it as accurately as you have. Thank you so much
So very true Meg!!!!! I have been recovered from Anorexia for about 10years, not a day goes past when I still hear that critic’s voice, the guilt over my eating/body/exercise. The difference now is the voice is not as loud as it used to be. Also if I listen to that critic and act on that guilt, is that really going to allow me to be the best nurse/friend/daughter/sister/aunt that I can be??? The answer will always be no!!! Will listening to the critic allow me to travel around the world - NO!!!! So there is no choice I can’t listen to the guilt!!!
Beautiful 😍 message. Lots of love for You ❤️
Thanks Meg, I really needed to hear this today 💙
thank you once again❤️ you’re amaizing! hope you’re doing well in your recovery! you’ve deflinitly helped mine!
Vappu Räikkönen thanks hun, it’s never easy but overall I’d say it’s getting better 😘
I think it’s interesting that I watched this today while struggling with butter 😀 Funny how things come together in life sometimes. You are just a beacon of light 💗
Your oats always look so delicious! I love your vlogs. Each topic is so relevant and they seriously make my day. :) xoxo
Perfect video at the perfect moment, as always - thank you Meg - really resonated with this 🙌💗
I love your videos so much . I’ve always found them so helpful. I started watching you long ago before I even started recovery and you made me feel like it was worth it. In the hospital I would always think of things you said to help me.. couple months later now I can watch your videos when they’re posted and they’re are as helpful as always. I’m so thankful for you, your channel, and your consistency !! 💜
Alexa Cisneros 💛💛
It's like your 'butter' vlog was meant for me. Butter avoidance for me is akin to people avoiding anthrax
The Judge 😂😂 sorry not laughing at you, but I know the exact level of fear. Which you’ll always have if you always avoid... it helps me to think things like “do I think it’s ok for other people to eat?” (Don’t let your head jump in there with “but you’re different!). “Do I want to be that person that can’t eat certain foods?”. & also for perspective, “is it really that important. Will I look back10 years from now & think thank god I managed to avoid butter like it was anthrax?”
Also, this isn’t to say it’ll be easy or comfortable straight away, but with time & repetition & not compensating around it it will become easier 😘😘
@@megsyrecovery191 I don't mind the hilarity of it as I'm a stage where I see it is very outre. I often do have to look at others around me to realise that no one cares about butter as I do. They go about their business regardless. To them, it's like any other innocuous food, like oil, bread or the like. Hey, at least I don't refer to it as 'poison' anymore.
I love being creative to distract me too. I'm making a recovery scrapbook at the moment and that really helps me ❤
holy moly those chocolate oats look divine!!
needed that so much right now!! thank you so much!♥ can you make a video about how to stay motivated and positive in an ED clinic? and do you have tips for how to not get triggered by other girls who barely eat? And how do you deal with the thought of being not thin/bad enough to start recovery?
Av_ 2003 oooh I think I did a video called not ill enough or something, one of the early ones. Also I haven’t been IP for 10 years, it’s probably changed a lot. Not sure if Be the best to cover that 🙈
Don’t know you but trying to help, try an old channel by Valerie camai , find it and although she hasn’t uploaded for over a hear, it’s still there, and when she did upload she covered almost that exact thing in detail and is excellent with advice as she is now completely recovered. Look it up and go back to look through the very early videos she put on when she was in and out of inpatient constantly. Hope this helps
much needed video
I love you, Megsy!!!You are SO HELPFUL!!! I would love you to know how much I appreciate your work ♥♥♥ you are the best youtuber and the most beautiful and nice person please do not stop ♥♥♥ And I also love your cats :D ♥
Markéta Dobešová awww thanks chick 💛
I just recently found your channel! So happy I did, you have amazing videos ❤. Also, I love your grumpy cat haha
So challenging daily is recommended, but 1. What if you don't crave said food?
2. Don't want the same thing day-to-day?
3. Unable to obtain what you want when one wants and then not want when you have?
Thank you
I know this is super random but your hair always looks amazing ❤️
Dalanis Daring haha thanks. It’s gotten a lot thicker!
What if I rather choose to avoid "butter" over exposing myself because of that irritable mood which I hurt my family around me? Do you understand?
Michaela Králiková yes I totally get you... thing is your frustration & irritation won’t last forever. It’s just there the first few times you do it & then it passes & butter or whatever becomes a normal, every day, stress free thing to have. Whereas your ED I imagine will have quite a large impact on yours & your family’s life. I used to say to Bren “look this weeks going to be hard, sorry if I’m irritable, it won’t be forever”
Meg, I absolutely love your videos but wanted to ask you a hard question. Have you ever asked yourself what is hiding behind your anxiety? I do understand that anxiety response is automatic and that you need to retrain your brain to think and behave differently around the food but I am wondering if you have ever had an opportunity to address possible traumas in your life and self-esteem issues outside of the cognitive behavior therapy that have lead you in the first place to develop an eating disorder?
I think in one of your videos you mentioned your parents got divorced when you were younger and I assume this is something that has also affected you deeply in your life and possibly triggered an eating disorder. When I looked down into myself I realized my whole family is prone to mental health issues like depression, anxiety and addiction and that there was been some trauma transferred from generation to generation, also a lot of abuse and messy relationships. My own mother has a disorder relationship with food herself and it got passed onto me and my brother (what if I get hungry and we get run out of the food, food equals love).
I do understand you might not be willing to talk about deeper stuff and I appreciate and understand that but these are things many of people with eating disorders struggle with and have to deal with them at some point. I am sure you had also some trauma work during previous hospitalizations as well and some family counseling but these are things also important to recovery that people need to hear about. My eating disorder recovery started when I started to deal with family and relationship issues, food abstinence and recovery came second.
You are so in tune with your illness and I have always been told I am too. It is good to know what you have to do I guess it is just the implementation stage that makes it harder haha.
Whatever happened with your rings girly?!
Much love. X
Madison Killer well, I’ve not been posting it but rings might be making an appearance soon (replaced) 😋
Maybe they were too big? I noticed too. I wore mine 2 sizes too big for a year because I couldn’t bear to take off my wedding band for 2 days to get it resized
Hi i was wanting to ask about whether you had the fear when you had a big weight gain in what feels like a way to fast time period and then feel like you will just will never stop gaining and become massive. If you have any help it would be amazing as im struggling to keep fighting as i frel so much fear and ultimately im fighting ED (name i call my anorexia) but i feel like no matter what I try to tell myself the thoughts are becoming more and more stronger and I am getting so exhausted from fighting ED mentally each day.
Also you are a inspiration to me to keep fighting and face my food fears and ED
Hey Meg!
Do you ever find that when you reflect on your illness you get caught in a downward spiral? I find that whenever I run across a picture or memory of my illness, I can’t stop thinking about it until I’ve gone down a rabbit hole of nostalgia and I start to think I was better then or I “miss” my ed.
so today was my birthday, it was awful, depression and my ed have robbed me of the ability to enjoy life. but i decided to fight hard today and managed to eat a sqaure of lint chocolate and salmon and swede chips for dinner. i wasdoing so well until i looked at how much fat is in salmon, now i cant cope. ive gone from 6/7g of fat a day normally to 25g today. i feel so gross. i managed to eat more but failed to eat 'well'/ in my macro ratios
.
i cant get over it hours later, i feel sick and greasy and gross. one high fat day cant make much difference can it? i know its dumb but u am scared i will wake up flabby now. sorry i just don't know who to ask for reassurance
Meg❤️sy Each week you Amaze me & Rewire me more & more! OMG now you got me clicking my fingers 🤣😂 👌👌👌
rita conte hahahahaha snappy snappy 😂😂
Brilliant video! Hugs!!
Random question!love your t shirt, where did you get it?
Zara I think. A while ago though
You are awlays talking about your husband in a very nice way. I believe he IS a very nice man and also very intelligent and honest. And this man loves you. Do you know what I mean? Why does he love you? He loves you because you are also nice, intelligent, beautiful, honest, patient......etc woman. May be you could write down into your notebook too :-)....I like the idea you are talking about that one does not have to deserve to be loved by others or to be loved by himself or herself. I discuss it often with my psychologist. Last time I was not able to tell her any single think why I think the other people love me. Because now, I am sick, not very beautiful in my skinny body, not able to enjoy sports, going out (I am not physically fit, have problems with my legs) but still there are some people around me, who like me, enjoy my company for "no reason"....may be I am not so bad?..is there something on me which other appreciate?....may be..
Just needed at this time xx
Hey one of my best friends is also in recovery from anorexia and she compares herself to me on bad days and she will say things like 'how do you get so skinny" "you are so skinny". I have no idea to respond when she says these things. Do you have any advise?
Do you think we can face those fears and tolerate these uncomforts at job or school? I have already gone in treatment many many times, inpatient, day program, etc. And now, even if I have a long way to go regarding weigh and freedom, I will try to go back to work soon and hope I will be able to go forward and feel less obset while I am actively making efforts to recover. I don't know if I am irrealistic.... anyways, I'll give a try because I want to be around people and change my mind and experiment something else than eating disorder as a central subject in my life. By the way, on your list, you forgot Beyonce and Stevee!!!! xxx Lots of love (sorry for my English)
Dominique L. I managed it at work. Some days were very hard & sometimes I had to go home, but over time it’s gotten so much easier & now I’m generally fine at work. Recovery always came first for me 😘
@@megsyrecovery191 😘
Did you gone through unable to go poo when you start eating? I felt scared when I don’t poo while I am recovering? Thx
team Meg ( and Lucy! ) x
Lucy Priest 👭
Please, I have a guestin - problém. I do not have a big problém with eating anything, I am also happy seeing higher number on the scale. But what I hate is that - I am not kidding, but I have a huge belly all the time. It is like most of my weight go there, plus I am always - not only after meal but also in the morning, bloated. If I see some pictures where people show how they are "bloated" I can say they look like I am not bloated. In fact I have this problém long term - might be because I have a long term ups downs ED. It is going to pass? Will I have normal body again? Ok I can see I also have some "materiál" on my legs, arms, but the most of it is around my belly (supported with bloating) and my face, but I especially do not like it at the waist part. How to cope with this? Is i normal? I read that it is but still I hate my belly. I want to look normal in bikini in summer, feel comfortable in legins, jeans...without that HUGE belly- stomach. I am also often constipated :-(...thansk for any advice
Kenya Me too! It goes away! Hang in there and take care of yourself
Thanks so much Shania for support I keep on going, fighting etc whwreas the kilos go. Though, I hope it will go away...:-)
Kenya check out the channel "follow the intuition" she has loads of videos on bloating or digestive problems in recovery - I have this too but always feel better after watching one of her videos. its a normal part of recovery - horrible but normal. i agree though most " bloated" pictures i've seen i think " what are you talking about?? you don't know what real bloating is!"
thank you so much, in fact my problém went a little bit better during the last week, I try not to focus on it so much a may be my body starts to get used to the situation. I also use probiotics. To stop chew gums lelps too (my bad habit from "that time" - I could use a whole packet or more in one day)....and yes, agreeeeeee - they do not know what bloating is :-D, totally agree
Does your perfectionism cross over towards your creative/artsy hobbies as well as it does food rules and work?
Ugh! I love decorating and painting, but I get frustrated when the colors don't "feel right" or things just dont look harmonized enough.
It would be ahhhhmazing if one day I could tolerate sitting with my fear foods, AND sitting with a fugly green poop colored wall.
I just don't remember always needing things perfect (to the extent this need feels now) until my ED came along. Idk! I just hope I'm not compensating for challenging my food fears by repainting the same wall over and over. Or banging 8 million holes in the wall because the picture is now TOO centered lol
Michelle Walsh yeh so been there. We just got new curtains that I don’t like & I can’t stop thinking about it 😆 mine definitely got better with weight gain, I’ve relaxed off a bit. But self expectations is something I really need to work on at the moment 🙈 I could do a video about it maybe. Although it doesn’t make loads of sense to me still
Do you go through phases with food? This is my latest.#peanutbutter on #sourdoughbread.(and yes, with butter as well!) , honestly, a number of years ago I don't think I'd have let myself have this for breakfast. I didn't even let myself keep #bread in the house. Why? No doubt it was some bullshit story about what I thought I "should" eat instead. For all reasons #dietculture of course!.
These days I'm more relaxed about allowing myself to have the things that I crave😊👏 when I crave them. Which means that this week is peanut butter toast but next week, maybe something else? Who knows . But I'm ok with that.letting go of all the "should's" and the restrictive and fearful mindset around food has been liberating. I won't say it's always been easy, it can be difficult to reprogram beliefs which were at least two decades old by the time I started questioning them. Nonetheless ,it has been worthwhile undertaking in my intuitive eating
Heyy could you do a video talking about intimacy in ED/ED recovery nothing of course u feel uncomfortable sharing!🥰
Jami Gustafsson hey, yeh it’s a really good topic, & something which changes drastically as I get iller / weller. I’ve been meaning to do something about relationships, it’s just awkward haha 😂😂😂😂
Yeah true...😅🤣
amazing!! could you share some tips that helped you to spend money on yourself??and specially in food??what does you psico suggest you about this issue??THANKS for everything!! =)
Ujué Fresán ooooh I actually did a video about this. I can’t remember the name of it but I drank a Costa frostino in the car... & this is terrible but I think I can even remember it’s a blueberry cheesecake fronstino. I think I had a chicken sandwich too.
Anyway, it’s very similar to the food stuff honestly. You can’t wait until it feels easy, or until you don’t have rules around money in place, because that will never happen. You brain is wired around this well practice behaviour & belief of not spending money. So for me there was a lot of forcing it, making myself, feeling guilty & doing it anyway. Also, weight gain helped me massively!!! I just naturally chilled as I gained, without having to do anything
Love video again, what did you say about anxiety, it is the same my psychologist said and what I have read. It is a part of KBT method. I learned it when recovering from my OCD - eg. I feel dirty, I have to wash my hands.....(with no real reason) and if I go and wash my hands I only feed my illness, becasuse the relief is only short - time. If I wait for some time, the anxiety will pass somehow...I think it is the same with ED or whatever other addiction or so, like the alcoholist "only have" a sip of wine....., this works in everythink you are used to do as a short time relief (you are lying to your self saying - it just now for today, next time it will be better, no...its not if you do not stop it). Thank you for your explanation, it really - scientifically and psychologically based.
In your relapse did you consider inpatient treatment ?
Jo Basile no, luckily I had really good support & was able to push through & do it at home 😘
Truth
How do you met your hubby?
But you are thin you look good in your clothes - I feel like my body looks horrible in clothes and cannot even begin the think about say wearing jeans or tucking in my top
Lisa Kulak it helped me a lot to change my style a bit & but clothes I feel comfy in, but my psychologist also always says to be careful not to body avoid. There’s absolutely no reason why you can’t wear jeans!
@@megsyrecovery191 what style changes have you made ? Clothing feeling tight on me is a huge trigger - and jeans ....... oh my
Lisa Kulak I'm the same...I'm trying to see what feels better but also trying with jeans. Not too tight but trying still . I'm trying to change a bit my style also and feel ok with it
Good news to share, Christ Jesus loves you:)
Have you ever came across a Rachel’s road to recovery channel
It’s pretty disturbing to watch and also I think it’s a scam of some sort
She presents anorexia as it’s a sort of like a cancer that you have no control over and so many people surround her, taking care of her and I think kind of enabling her
I find this channel very misleading and irritating
lena jazuk I’m not sure, but there’s actually very few channels which are helpful for me at my stage. I pretty much exclusively watch people who are recovered - properly!! Not part recovered but you’re watching thinking “really?” 🤔 my favourites are Tabitha Farrar, follow the intuition, what Mia did next & damn the diets. That’s nothing against other channels. Just personally for me & the nature of my illness & stage these are the most helpful. Do you watch them? Also, if something doesn’t sit right with you, unfollow!!! It’s nothing personal to them. Everyone’s individual 😘😘😘
Megsy Recovery
I follow them as well it’s just mind blowing what some channels share and preach
I’m not sure about What Mia .. I have watched all of her videos and didn’t get really understand how she recovered