Ranking Every Mario Kart 8 DLC Track by How Safe It Is

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  • Опубліковано 21 гру 2024

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  • @j0rts
    @j0rts  Рік тому +992

    Where my safety enthusiasts at?

  • @hjt091
    @hjt091 Рік тому +1930

    In the interests of safety I must point out that in Tokyo, Sydney, London, Bangkok, and Singapore, you were driving on the wrong side of the road

    • @sinteleon
      @sinteleon Рік тому +199

      Though in the case of Singapore, it's likely the roads were sectioned off for the race specifically so that's not an issue. (Similarly to how roads are sectioned off for f1 races)

    • @breazy832
      @breazy832 Рік тому +14

      No they’re wrong

    • @justincecil
      @justincecil 11 місяців тому +8

      What about Germany and ampsterdam

    • @KatieEquestrian1
      @KatieEquestrian1 11 місяців тому +20

      Very very good safty point alway drive on the correct side of the road

    • @SCL6054Prouctions
      @SCL6054Prouctions 11 місяців тому +34

      ​@@justincecilThey drive on the right side of the road like America and France

  • @MoonriseMystery
    @MoonriseMystery Рік тому +969

    I appreciate j0rts' determination to get eaten by every single piranha plant

    • @j0rts
      @j0rts  Рік тому +312

      It’s a tough job but someone’s got to do it

    • @Mega-Mato
      @Mega-Mato Рік тому +44

      ​@@j0rtsYou missed one in piranha plant cove!

    • @Datenauflauf
      @Datenauflauf Рік тому +40

      ​@@j0rts"how fast can you get eaten by a piranha plant in every..."

    • @Redpoppy80
      @Redpoppy80 Рік тому +16

      It's for science!

    • @BlueBoiYT
      @BlueBoiYT 10 місяців тому +8

      Also jorts kinda died in bowser castle 3

  • @Radman1889
    @Radman1889 Рік тому +844

    j0rts, the only man who can give 3DS' Rainbow Road a 1/10 and everyone is cool with it

    • @bronzebeez9963
      @bronzebeez9963 Рік тому +49

      That's because he is right

    • @toxdazcubing
      @toxdazcubing Рік тому +10

      ​@bronzebeez9963 that's it

    • @endstoneninja3845
      @endstoneninja3845 Рік тому +43

      And the only man who can give Toad Circuit a 9/10

    • @doggo7721
      @doggo7721 10 місяців тому +6

      ​@@bronzebeez9963only right in the safety sense right?

    • @bronzebeez9963
      @bronzebeez9963 10 місяців тому +5

      @@doggo7721 yes

  • @Azurious
    @Azurious Рік тому +222

    "Maybe it's not so safe here" Yeah honestly that describes London quite well

    • @88megagirl
      @88megagirl 14 днів тому

      Yeah I mean last time I visited London I was eaten by that giant chain chomp 😔

  • @jamesleduke873
    @jamesleduke873 Рік тому +382

    As a Canadian, I can confirm the Vancouver track is pretty accurate. They drive through figure skating rinks all the time. The only inaccuracy is that they didn't hang any cars under the bridges.

    • @dontmindme12429
      @dontmindme12429 Рік тому +14

      As another Canadian I testify to this statement

    • @bronzebeez9963
      @bronzebeez9963 Рік тому +6

      As another Canadian I also testify

    • @JaredtheRabbit
      @JaredtheRabbit Рік тому +5

      As someone who hasn’t been there since pre-pandemic 2020 (and another Canadian), I can also testify.

    • @tracychallice1099
      @tracychallice1099 Рік тому +18

      As a Canadian I contend there wasn’t enough of a riot in and around the hockey rink but I guess they gotta keep that ESRB rating

    • @JaredtheRabbit
      @JaredtheRabbit Рік тому

      @@tracychallice1099 Lol

  • @thomasdougherty6737
    @thomasdougherty6737 Рік тому +1057

    7:22 As an American who has never been to Australia, I can confirm that Austrialia is FILLED with jumps over water out of buildings

  • @xxAmi15
    @xxAmi15 Рік тому +208

    23:49 I’m not sure that’s quite the word you were looking for…

    • @tusken9669
      @tusken9669 Рік тому +40

      So people in Madrid don't crap out safety signs?!

    • @Chubby_Bub
      @Chubby_Bub Рік тому +63

      I think he meant "defacement" lol

    • @JukeCubed
      @JukeCubed Рік тому +43

      ​@@Chubby_BubI think it's desecration

    • @Marsi-P
      @Marsi-P 11 місяців тому +17

      @@Chubby_Bubmy first thought was he meant “deprecation”

    • @stenanderson1695
      @stenanderson1695 7 місяців тому +5

      defamation is probably what his brain was going for but it was so close!

  • @PantheonFefnir
    @PantheonFefnir Рік тому +412

    I truly admire j0rts's commitment to the safety officer craft, truly an inspiration. If only more safety officers adhered to j0rts's example by driving headlong into any and all dangers to prove how dangerous the roads are. He truly is an exemplar of his craft.

  • @hillomunkkiseni
    @hillomunkkiseni Рік тому +56

    As a biomedicine major, I would like to point out the dangerousness of the Sqeaky Clean Sprint driving through a fiiiiilthy sewer pipe, you will get sick and die from that.

  • @Hubbz44
    @Hubbz44 Рік тому +224

    Thank you for pointing out all of the safety hazards on these tracks. Going forward I will only play tracks with a 9 rating and above to make sure I am as safe as possible.

    • @echoingoutofexistence4222
      @echoingoutofexistence4222 Рік тому +1

      bot.

    • @Hubbz44
      @Hubbz44 11 місяців тому +5

      @@echoingoutofexistence4222 Nuh uh

    • @hanhtu5363
      @hanhtu5363 10 місяців тому +7

      @@echoingoutofexistence4222are you sure about that

    • @dataexpunged4784
      @dataexpunged4784 10 місяців тому +8

      ​@@echoingoutofexistence4222I don't think you know what that word means.

    • @brbrbrbrbbrbrbrbr
      @brbrbrbrbbrbrbrbr 5 місяців тому +2

      ​@echoingoutofexistence4222 yea its a funny genaric coment not a bot its relavent and eavrything

  • @carlesgarcia8892
    @carlesgarcia8892 Рік тому +197

    This may be a bit controversial, but as it name says, Waluigi Stadium is a stadium, so it is prepared to do this sort of jumps and stunts, so, in fact, Waluigi Stadium is one of the safest roads😂

    • @angelogaray8019
      @angelogaray8019 9 місяців тому +26

      Maybe for bikes, but not for cars

    • @nicholasstanton9575
      @nicholasstanton9575 3 місяці тому +2

      Maybe not for cars, but for bikes.

    • @skipthefox4858
      @skipthefox4858 3 місяці тому +2

      ⁠​⁠@@nicholasstanton9575Cars not for maybe, for but bikes

    • @Hyruleanartist
      @Hyruleanartist 3 місяці тому +4

      ⁠@@skipthefox4858maybe cars for bikes not but

    • @GlorpGlorpGlorp
      @GlorpGlorpGlorp 2 місяці тому +3

      Not but bikes, but for cars.

  • @generalcrab0009
    @generalcrab0009 Рік тому +82

    Avanti is Italian for “forward” or “ahead” or something along those lines.
    Also the Rome Avanti Chain Chomps *will* attack you, just only if you’re moving fast

  • @Messed-up-monkey
    @Messed-up-monkey Рік тому +37

    As an Australian I can confirm that we must jump over water to reach the road, the drop bears managed to tear down many bridges and roads forcing us to have to jump over water to travel (I recon the tourists forgot their Vegemite behind the ears)
    Yes we do ride kangaroos

  • @Brianna58321
    @Brianna58321 Рік тому +110

    As a Londoner, can confirm I have to dodge a Chain Chomp during my morning commute. It’s still more enjoyable than the Central line rush hour stampede. 10/10 accuracy from Nintendo. Hope this helps ☺️!

  • @jordentacoztm
    @jordentacoztm Рік тому +161

    I just thought of something, since you covered all mario kart 8 stages maybe you can rank all mario oddyssey kingdoms by safety? I think that could be fun

  • @dkmayhem6279
    @dkmayhem6279 Рік тому +158

    i feel that the princess' garden course may need a second look. reviewing these courses as you do, may have hidden the fact that her course redirects you back into oncoming traffic against your fellow racers. a significant safety hazard, easily overlooked when you are the only racer on the track.

    • @bunnybee7598
      @bunnybee7598 Рік тому +14

      Same goes for Paris promenade!!

    • @ElecWoods-rd3qq
      @ElecWoods-rd3qq Рік тому +5

      Rome Avanti

    • @angelogaray8019
      @angelogaray8019 9 місяців тому +4

      Same for Paris, Rome, Amsterdam, and maybe some more that I’m forgetting

  • @Mrnotpib
    @Mrnotpib Рік тому +25

    I love how he is, in game, taking every turn sooo cautiously.

  • @Man-tini
    @Man-tini Рік тому +79

    I think we all owe j0rts a huge round of applause for doing his utmost best to keep us safe. I now know that I shouldn’t take my car underwater, on a ship, or in outer space. 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

  • @Ajz092
    @Ajz092 Рік тому +21

    In Rosalina's Ice World, those are stalactites. You can differentiate them from stalagmites if you remember that stalactites are holding on TIGHT to the ceiling, and stalagmites are MIGHTY structures coming from the ground.

  • @notthetelephonehogger
    @notthetelephonehogger Рік тому +11

    As someone who lives in Vancouver… we do get dangerous bridges, dangerously fly towards color coordinated buildings, get cult vibes when we drive through an ice rink so pretty accurate

  • @timonobel615
    @timonobel615 Рік тому +23

    13:12 as a dutch person i can say that that score is quite accurate to the actual city

  • @morzanthegod3186
    @morzanthegod3186 Рік тому +94

    I absolutely LOVE THIS. This is such a ridiculous concept and an absolutely beautiful out of the box idea. Super entertaining.
    You've covered Zelda and Mario content..... I'd love to see some Donkey Kong Country. Maybe fastest animal mount?

    • @ShiroiSenritsu
      @ShiroiSenritsu Рік тому +2

      I would love more weird ranking videos!
      I also recommend the channel @Any_Austin too! He has a series taking employment surveys in various video game towns (more entertaining than it sounds) and also inspecting/ranking Skyrim's restaurants, among other unusual video game content.

    • @morzanthegod3186
      @morzanthegod3186 Рік тому +2

      @@ShiroiSenritsu thanks I'll check it out. Sounds interesting! I love out the box stuff like that. I love ai things as well. Patrick Star ai "Because I got High" is FUCKING HILARIOUS. I suggest checking it out. The song canonically fits his character to a "T" as well!

  • @espeon6480
    @espeon6480 Рік тому +48

    australian here! we do this all the time, don't even worry 🥰 I once performed in the opera house and there were in fact cars flying through the whole time. everyone was totally safe, it's pretty standard

  • @cobleb
    @cobleb Рік тому +52

    Can we all just appreciate how the safety inspector never disappoints with his safety-ness.

  • @OverflowingWithIdeas
    @OverflowingWithIdeas Рік тому +5

    23:49 My good sir. There is no poop on that sign. I believe the word you are looking for is defamation.

  • @JonaSam178
    @JonaSam178 Рік тому +9

    14:06 you cannot forget the halfpipes, and how, if you're not careful, you can fly off.

  • @chameleoncove
    @chameleoncove Рік тому +5

    15:19 transitioned perfectly between the explosion and an ad for a match 3 game involving an explosion.

  • @cobleb
    @cobleb Рік тому +34

    Can we just appreciate how safety inspector always gets bitten by the piranha plants so we don’t have to ❤️

  • @nicky23anims68
    @nicky23anims68 Рік тому +10

    J0rts, you are a lifesaver, i was recently thinking of going to rainbow road for a vacation but now that i've seen this, i will surely go to daisy circuit instead, Thanks!

  • @DoctorSpacebar
    @DoctorSpacebar Рік тому +27

    It's said King Theseus had the Athens course commissioned to take his new chariot for joyrides.
    Tragically, the chariot kept getting blown up by Hades's kid, who spammed the Water dash around it, and so Theseus never got to take his chariot to Mario Kart.

  • @Layorgenla
    @Layorgenla Рік тому +5

    23:49 😂😂 that's....that's not the word but I can't stop imagining that action now

  • @The-EJ-Factor
    @The-EJ-Factor Рік тому +67

    I like how the more dangerous corses tend to be ranked the better ones.

    • @WCircuit7224
      @WCircuit7224 Рік тому +11

      Aside from coconut mall and waluigi pinball but yeah

  • @FlygonkingVGC
    @FlygonkingVGC Рік тому +58

    1:41 the most danger is the unrendered grass

    • @rubengoldman5830
      @rubengoldman5830 Рік тому +28

      My headcanon is that the Toads who were responsible for building the racetrack didn't know how to take care of grass, so they just used green concrete. Driving on it still slows you down because it was a late addition so it hasn't fully dried. Thoughts?

    • @michaelkowal3230
      @michaelkowal3230 Рік тому +5

      So who took care of the grass in Mario Kart 7 since the grass was much better there

    • @sp0ng3man
      @sp0ng3man Рік тому

      womp womp

  • @maratby4364
    @maratby4364 Рік тому +14

    Coconut Mall is slightly more dangerous in online races. The cars don't move in time trials, because that's how they were on release, but Nintendo updated the track so that the cars move (because people complained about the cars not moving I'd assume) and make reckless donuts that take up a lot of space. Its rating might be affected by that. The cars weren't changed in TTs so that they wouldn't have to clear the leaderboard or anything like that, also an assumption by me

  • @gardiangamer2443
    @gardiangamer2443 Рік тому +8

    just want to say, some track change each lap, for example, toad circuit gets a glider ramp added in 2nd and 3rd lap, so, you will need to cou't those in too.

  • @joshachu8743
    @joshachu8743 Рік тому +19

    Apparently he’s got a hatred for chain chomps. Maybe he should rank the species of chain chomps based on how safe they are next.

  • @Beavie
    @Beavie Рік тому +2

    20:35 In our defense, hockey is a pretty pucking big deal here in Canada.
    Glad to see you take the safety of drivers very seriously.

  • @JigglesMcRibs
    @JigglesMcRibs Рік тому +19

    I like the part where you called the oil fields a construction site.

    • @AnonymOus-ss9jj
      @AnonymOus-ss9jj 11 місяців тому +1

      What about how he ridiculed the people of Madrid for defecating a stop sign?

  • @path6733
    @path6733 Рік тому +6

    You are truly the safety hero we all need

  • @brotemca8020
    @brotemca8020 5 місяців тому +2

    Australian here - you're right about that 'driving through buildings' thing, that's highly unusual! In the interests of safety, we make sure to dismount our kangaroos whenever we enter an indoor zone, unless there is a specifically marked hopping area. Even then, if we're in a mixed zone, maximum speed is 10km/h and it's double demerits for any offenses.
    Glad I can help clear up some confusion! :3

  • @TFactor419
    @TFactor419 Рік тому +15

    Hey j0rts! That video was great, but I would like to point out a flaw that wasn’t mentioned. On Rosalina’s Ice World, you forgot to take into account that it took place in outer space. Just thought I would let you mkow

    • @agjakku
      @agjakku Рік тому +10

      I mean, it does take place on a different planet, but there are trees on it, so the planet seems to have an atmosphere, suffocation shouldn't be a problem.

    • @TFactor419
      @TFactor419 Рік тому +3

      @@agjakku that does make sense. Thanks for letting me know

  • @Pringleman73
    @Pringleman73 Рік тому +7

    Im very happy someone took time out of there day to adress this matter i am so enthusiastic for saftey my son goes to school surrounded by bubble wrap

  • @rewrose2838
    @rewrose2838 Рік тому +4

    Man at some point I got so good at understanding your point system, I was able to guess Athens and Daisy Cruiser scores perfectly

  • @ikuris.c
    @ikuris.c Рік тому +5

    After discovering your channel you really inspired me to start a channel of my own! Thank you so much for making these awesome videos!

  • @Aesuriana
    @Aesuriana Рік тому +3

    "i always forget which one is which" easy way to remember, a stalagmite stands MIGHTILY, while a stalactite hangs TIGHTLY

  • @nutsi3
    @nutsi3 11 місяців тому +3

    7:08 as an Australian I can confirm that this track is very inaccurate, it’s meant to be upside down

  • @yrnglow_
    @yrnglow_ 4 місяці тому +3

    As some who has visted london many times, i can confirm it is very known very giant chain chomps, thank you for being so accurate :)

  • @ThunderCam777
    @ThunderCam777 Рік тому +10

    I'm genuinely surprised that OSHA hires a duck for this position, but he honestly seems to be doing a good job. I'm impressed.

  • @aquawolf9969
    @aquawolf9969 Рік тому +4

    I never knew I needed a video like this until I watched it, I’m now hooked on safety lmao 😂

  • @epikitee2186
    @epikitee2186 8 місяців тому +2

    24:20 come on, it's rosalina. she lives in SPACE. places that are beautiful, albeit cold, barren, and really dangerous (especially to drive in) are where she THRIVES.

  • @smart_gamer2655
    @smart_gamer2655 Рік тому +4

    When you said infraction I immediately thought of bumbles micfumbles but you have a great video and I enjoyed it a large amount

  • @soulshield7744
    @soulshield7744 Рік тому +3

    I think Koopa Cape used to be Safer too, but they renovated the tunnel to have no roof. You still drove in potentially electrified water but there was minimal risk of drowning

  • @michaelduff2382
    @michaelduff2382 Рік тому +5

    There aren't many people who can make me laugh just from the quality of their voice let alone the content of their words

  • @WTheW_gaming
    @WTheW_gaming Рік тому +3

    Thank you for never failing to make videos I didn't know I needed :)

  • @aureliamastergoomba1278
    @aureliamastergoomba1278 Рік тому +6

    Baby Park still holds the crown as most safe

  • @Yukislego
    @Yukislego Рік тому +2

    great job for that! I will now be able to pick tracks which have LOADS of safety precautions unlike waligi pinball where there are 2 strange barriers that give you a controlled shock near the end of the track (FNAF reference), giant meatal balls that will destroy anything in its path, random jump boots and at the start a EPILEPSISY FUNHOUSE

  • @HayJays
    @HayJays Рік тому +5

    The snowboarders were shocked at dk summit they just had a mask on so you couldn't tell

  • @resurrekt7114
    @resurrekt7114 Рік тому +2

    2:48 since a few updates ago, and specifically in the Grand Prix and VS modes, the drivers now WILDLY drive across the parking lot, doing sudden spins and lunges with their cars, I think this deserves at least a 0.5 point reduction

  • @TMACseries
    @TMACseries Рік тому +2

    As a British person who has been to London multiple times I can confirm that sometimes we do let our chain chomps free.

  • @stevefindley2265
    @stevefindley2265 2 місяці тому +1

    In Australia it’s perfectly normal to drive through buildings and fly onto roads, love the accuracy of Sydney Sprint

  • @ladyofmisery6519
    @ladyofmisery6519 Рік тому +8

    Since you've evaluated the safety of all the Mario Kart 8 tracks, would you be interested in doing the same to the CTR Nitro Fueled tracks?

  • @untitled_videos_rblx
    @untitled_videos_rblx Рік тому +6

    now what would be funny would be if someone modded all the tracks to fit the safety guidelines

  • @Mario583a
    @Mario583a Рік тому +1

    j0rts: Don't drive through malls.
    Me: haha, kid carts that look like cars go BRRRRRR.

  • @Cyber_kumo
    @Cyber_kumo Рік тому +13

    I've combined both videos and made a list a top 10 for Safest and Most Dangerous tracks.
    Safest
    1. (tie) Baby Park (GCN) and Daisy Circuit (Wii) 9.9
    3. Toad Circuit (3DS) 9.8
    4. Mario Circuit 3 (SNES) 9.7
    5. Excitebike Stadium (WiiU) 9.2
    6. Moo Moo Meadows (Wii) 8.6
    7. Ice Ice Outpost (WiiU) 8.5
    8. Yoshi's Circuit (GCN) 8.4
    9. (tie) Royal Raceway (N64), Mario Kart Stadium (WiiU), and Sunset Wilds (GBA) 8.3
    Most Dangerous
    1. Rainbow Road (3DS) 1.0
    2. Rainbow Road (Wii) 1.8
    3. Rainbow Road (WiiU) 1.9
    4. (tie) Bowser Castle (WiiU) and Bowser Castle 3 (SNES) 2.1
    6. DK Mountain (GCN) 2.2
    7. Grumble Volcano (Wii) 2.3
    8. Yoshi's Island (Switch) 2.4
    9. Piranha Plant Cove (Tour) 2.5
    10. Piranha Plant Slide (3DS) 3.7

  • @Pumpernikkle
    @Pumpernikkle Рік тому +5

    I HAD TO SEARCH FOR THIS AND NOW IM LATE BUT KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK OL CHAP I AM UR BIGGEST FAN

  • @CaptainRillaboomArmenia
    @CaptainRillaboomArmenia 6 місяців тому +2

    12:41 Eventually, you would stop thinking.

  • @Stephen-Fox
    @Stephen-Fox Рік тому +4

    Stalagtite - Stalagtites cling tightly to the ceiling, stalagmites are the other ones that grow out of the ground. (Other mnemonics are available, there are enough out there that you can basically pick whichever works for you)
    Now that you've evaluated the safety of all Mario Kart race tracks, maybe evaluate the safety of Pokémon gyms, considering those are basically walk-in theme park attractions aimed at 10-year-olds, the safety of them feels super important.

    • @bronzebeez9963
      @bronzebeez9963 Рік тому +1

      Genius

    • @PriffyViole
      @PriffyViole Рік тому +2

      I doubt any of them will be more unsafe than Skyla's cannon Gym, though I suppose the pinball game in Stow-on-Side might come close.

    • @Stephen-Fox
      @Stephen-Fox Рік тому +1

      @@PriffyViole Hm. Not sure if being shot face first into a wall from a canon or crossing rivers of molten magma (as per the dragon gym in Johto) would be less safe. Either judging it generally or by theme park regulations.

    • @BJGvideos
      @BJGvideos Рік тому +1

      ​@@PriffyVioleSkyla's cannons and Clair's lava pits are up there. Then there's stuff you have to do to face the leaders, like Jasmine's lighthouse that at one point includes a drop of at least 30 feet onto hard concrete, or Grusha's downhill race.

    • @PriffyViole
      @PriffyViole Рік тому +1

      @@BJGvideos I honestly had no idea Johto was so unsafe.

  • @mkdroz91
    @mkdroz91 9 місяців тому

    Your commitment to this bit all the way through is phenomenal. (I mean... bit? What bit? Thank you for keeping us safe!)

  • @Obstagoon862
    @Obstagoon862 4 місяці тому +2

    Just for the heck of it, I took all your rankings from both videos and listed all 96 tracks below:
    1: Baby Park (9.9)
    1: Daisy Circuit (9.9)
    3: Toad Circuit (9.8)
    4: SNES Mario Circuit 3 (9.7)
    5: Excitebike Arena (9.2)
    6: Moo Moo Meadows (8.6)
    7: Ice Ice Outpost (8.5)
    8: Yoshi Circuit (8.4)
    9: Mario Kart Stadium (8.3)
    9: Royal Raceway (8.3)
    9: Sunset Wilds (8.3)
    12: GBA Mario Circuit (8.2)
    13: Toad's Turnpike (8.2)
    14: Mario Circuit (8.1)
    14: Animal Crossing (8.1)
    14: Sydney Sprint (8.1)
    17: Toad Harbor (8.0)
    17: Shroom Ridge (8.0)
    19: Dragon Driftway (7.9)
    19: Tokyo Blur (7.9)
    21: Cheep Cheep Beach (7.7)
    21: Rome Avanti (7.7)
    23: Dry Dry Desert (7.3)
    24: New York Minute (7.2)
    25: Electrodrome (7.1)
    25: Paris Promenade (7.1)
    25: Los Angeles Laps (7.1)
    28: Hyrule Circuit (7.0)
    28: Berlin Byways (7.0)
    30: Donut Plains 3 (6.9)
    30: Riverside Park (6.9)
    32: Sherbet Land (6.8)
    32: Bangkok Rush (6.8)
    34: Coconut Mall (6.7)
    35: Sunshine Airport (6.6)
    35: London Loop (6.6)
    35: DS Mario Circuit (6.6)
    38: Snow Land (6.5)
    39: Tick-Tock Clock (6.4)
    39: Merry Mountain (6.4)
    41: Bone-Dry Dunes (6.3)
    41: Waluigi Pinball (6.3)
    43: Wild Woods (6.2)
    43: Super Bell Subway (6.2)
    45: Ribbon Road (6.1)
    45: Yoshi Valley (6.1)
    45: Sky Garden (6.1)
    48: Cheese Land (6.0)
    48: Singapore Speedway (6.0)
    50: Neo Bowser City (5.9)
    51: Peach Gardens (5.8)
    52: Thwomp Ruins (5.7)
    53: Music Park (5.7)
    54: Daisy Cruiser (5.6)
    55: Moonview Highway (5.5)
    56: Wario's Gold Mine (5.4)
    56: Kalimari Desert (5.4)
    58: Mushroom Gorge (5.3)
    58: Shy Guy Falls (5.3)
    60: Water Park (5.2)
    60: Maple Treeway (5.2)
    60: Squeaky Clean Sprint (5.2)
    63: Mute City (5.1)
    63: Amsterdam Drift (5.1)
    63: Vancouver Velocity (5.1)
    66: Mount Wario (5.0)
    66: Athens Dash (5.0)
    68: Sweet Sweet Canyon (4.9)
    68: Cloudtop Cruise (4.9)
    68: SNES Rainbow Road (4.9)
    68: Boo Lake (4.9)
    68: Madrid Drive (4.9)
    73: Twisted Mansion (4.8)
    73: N64 Rainbow Road (4.8)
    73: Choco Mountain (4.8)
    73: DK Summit (4.8)
    77: Big Blue (4.7)
    77: Rock Rock Mountain (4.7)
    79: Koopa Cape (4.6)
    80: Wario Stadium (4.5)
    81: Sky-High Sundae (4.4)
    82: DK Jungle (4.3)
    82: Waluigi Stadium (4.3)
    82: Rosalina's Ice World (4.3)
    85: Dolphin Shoals (4.2)
    86: Ninja Hideaway (3.9)
    87: Piranha Plant Slide (3.7)
    88: Piranha Plant Cove (2.5)
    89: Yoshi's Island (2.4)
    90: Grumble Volcano (2.3)
    91: DK Mountain (2.2)
    92: Bowser's Castle (2.1)
    92: SNES Bowser Castle 3 (2.1)
    94: Rainbow Road (1.9)
    95: Wii Rainbow Road (1.8)
    96: 3DS Rainbow Road (1.0)

  • @br0k3n_url
    @br0k3n_url Рік тому +1

    australian here, driving thru buildings is completely normal here, it happens all the time! we even do grand prixs in our shopping centres so theres no need to worry :3

  • @jamiehubbard1713
    @jamiehubbard1713 Рік тому +1

    If it helps, Stalactites grow from the roof of the cave and then Stalagmites form on the bottom, I always think of the M looking like spikes on the floor to remember it. Great vid man!

  • @SpringStargazer
    @SpringStargazer Рік тому +1

    Oh I'm so excited for this!!! I was hoping you'd do a part 2 once all the tracks were out.

  • @Chubby_Bub
    @Chubby_Bub Рік тому +2

    Singapore does have those rooftop infinity pools, but they have pretty serious safety precautions.

  • @13Bubby
    @13Bubby Рік тому +1

    As an Australian, I can confirm driving into building and flying out of them to get to the road is the most normal thing we do.

  • @tek5403
    @tek5403 Рік тому +1

    There's something charminb about seeing him go through all these maps while avoiding boosts, tricks, and drifts

  • @Ironmonger38
    @Ironmonger38 Рік тому +3

    Can’t believe j0rts doesn’t know about the Vancouver bats. Those things are legendary for what they do to poor drivers who come across them. Should be a lower score as those things are evil

  • @Mario17h1
    @Mario17h1 Рік тому +1

    Thank you for taking the job here, Mr. J0rts, your compensation can be expected soon.

  • @madsta3
    @madsta3 5 місяців тому +3

    As an Aussie I can confirm we all drive through buildings

  • @nathanking7696
    @nathanking7696 2 місяці тому +1

    I love how he's always so calm in these videos

  • @JustsomeKid93
    @JustsomeKid93 Рік тому +3

    The fact that it’s easily missed shouldn’t change the overall ranking, but I would like to point out the part on daisy circuit that propels you through an extremely narrow staircase and into a glider over the road

  • @Charles-t6d2j
    @Charles-t6d2j 2 місяці тому +1

    7:07 I’m Australian and we do that all the time here

  • @oshahott2532
    @oshahott2532 Рік тому +1

    Being an adult is getting off of a 10 hour shift then going home and watching someone apply OSHA violations to fictional locations. 😂

  • @hydrobucky
    @hydrobucky Рік тому +1

    Every time I see one of your videos recommended to me, I smile :) Thanks for that

  • @whalecoin4121
    @whalecoin4121 Рік тому +1

    7:22 As an Australian, I can confirm that we do not exist because the earth is flat.

  • @TeknoThom
    @TeknoThom Рік тому +1

    Thank you for looking out for us racers! The world would be terrible without people like you

  • @matesafranka6110
    @matesafranka6110 Рік тому +2

    I was hoping you'd bring up the fact that if you fall off the track on Rainbow Road Wii, you plummet towards Earth and actually begin to burn up on re-entry.

  • @ElyssaTheTrans
    @ElyssaTheTrans 7 місяців тому +1

    “I appreciate how there’s a warning about boulders falling. I don’t appreciate that there are boulders falling” got me 💀

  • @pippypips
    @pippypips Рік тому +1

    7:20 we do drive through buildings, fly off a ramp just to reach the road

  • @CaptainCanoli
    @CaptainCanoli Рік тому +2

    As an actual Australian I quite enjoy the sport of driving through buildings and then jumping threw a window

  • @starscreamsniper926
    @starscreamsniper926 Рік тому +2

    For those who wanna know for the ice cave course that Rosalina has, it's Stalactites that are from the top of the cave and Stalagmites on the bottom. Think t for tites and top and mites and bottom have M's.

  • @Zandeves
    @Zandeves Рік тому +4

    im offended by how high up waluigi pinball is. if im not mistaken a pinball will occasionally follow you down the upper half of the track. i guess most of it IS guarded by rails

  • @fadeddragon123
    @fadeddragon123 4 місяці тому +2

    Rainbow road is actually more dangerous because of the extreme temperatures not being taken into account.

  • @jayr.9884
    @jayr.9884 7 місяців тому +1

    i feel like the harshness with which london loop was rated was unwarranted given the only listed demerits were someone's dog getting off its leash and the inspector himself failing to obey traffic law

  • @kitsunelunari
    @kitsunelunari Рік тому +5

    I was like "didn't I already see this video" but I have no reading comprehension and didn't see the word "DLC"
    This video is DLC to the other video

  • @Tamago-W
    @Tamago-W 5 місяців тому +1

    i love how he drives like normal person in this video and not like he is actually playing mario kart

  • @lukeblack8146
    @lukeblack8146 Рік тому

    24:29 For clarification between stalagmites and stalactites, mites build up and tights hang down.

  • @thegreatestegg6303
    @thegreatestegg6303 8 місяців тому +1

    An argument I would like to make- as seen in both Super Mario Galaxy and Super Mario Odyssey, there is indeed air in space in the Super Mario universe. I don't know how, but there is, at least in certain locations, of which Rainbow Road is certainly included. This goes for Wii U Rainbow Road as well.

  • @Gridkeeperr
    @Gridkeeperr Рік тому

    24:30 An easy way to determine: Stalactite holds "tight" to the ceiling (the hanging ones). Stalagmite "might" reach the ceiling (the grounded ones).

    • @MisterNohbdy
      @MisterNohbdy Рік тому

      ...if you're gonna use the words "ceiling" and "ground" anyway, why not just note that "stalactite" has a C and "stalagmite" has a G

  • @katelynuwu
    @katelynuwu Рік тому +9

    As a Canadian I can confirm that Vancouver is just a cult city. probably best to pick a different province if you want a safe drive.