I've spotted another joke in texas meal scene! They said that their son used to eat more for a day than any other person would eat for a month - and tha't why he hated February. You know - he hated the shortest month in the year because he had been getting less... food.. in a day... for a month... Screw this movie
I've had panic attacks brought on by arguing.. but that's a mental health issue and it's nothing like it's portrayed. Anyway, another thing to add to the offensive list of this movie.
I do hope Elijah later encouraged the Uruk-Hai cast members to hunt down the director and producers of this movie… "Find the bad movie! Find the bad movie!"
What REALLY shocks me here was the director who worked on North. I'm looking at this review and thinking "how could Rob Reiner, the man who directed the timeless classic The Princess Bride...make this piece of garbage?" PB had heart, comedic timing, memorable lines/scenes/characters and a touching story. North is a sort of film Friedberg and Seltzer would make
And Reiner says he loved this movie. He said this about the movie in an interview with Archive of American TV: "I loved doing it, and some of the best jokes I ever had in a movie, are in that movie. I made this little fable, and people got mad at me, because, you know, I had done When Harry Met Sally..., and Misery, and A Few Good Men, and everybody said 'Oh, it should be a more important kind of movie.' I said, 'Why? Why can't you just make a little slice of a fable or something?'" @sadlobster1
I wasn't surprised it was a dream, after all the movie was so goofy and nonsensical, it HAD to be dream. No one in real life can be as dumb as the people in this film. A fucking minor can't separate himself from his parents. The only way that would happen is if CPS was called in to investigate, and confirmed claims of neglect or abuse. From then on, he'd go straight to the foster care system, not a family of his own choosing.
I'm just gobsmacked that they thought they could get away with all the racist stereotypes they crammed in by falling back on that tired ol' trope. Well, they did not. So at least there's some hope left for humanity.
I think the Texas joke is when they say "He could eat more than anybody in a month." and Reba replies, "That's why he hated February." is because February is a leap year and he can't eat as much because it's missing a day.
+Arctic Prowl That's one of the two jokes told in that segment. Nostalgia Critic got one, the "Mighty big loss" but missed the one you pointed out, that Buck hated February because it only has 28 or 29 days, unlike the others which have 30-31 which means he couldn't eat as much as he wanted to in that month.
Every good director has some stinkers in his career. Reiner had "North", Brian de Palma had "Bonfire of the Vanities", George Miller (of "Mad Max" fame) had "Happy Feet" (both)...
@@caliscearleon9540 I liked happy feet for the message. I liked it to be honest. I thought it was good. Basically, being different makes you an outcast usually. So it was nice seeing a movie embrace that more. That standing out isn't a bad thing.
Elijah Wood is such a talented actor and perhaps one of the most talented child actors ever. The thing is that when he was a kid, he seemed like an adult (even though he looked AND STILL looks like a kid)... It's weird to hear a 12 year old kid talk like a 40 year old.
I had actually never heard of this movie until I watched this review. The two things from this review that stuck out to me the most were: -The Texans singing, dancing and laughing over their dead, obese son. Your son is dead. Why are you happy and singing about it? What is wrong with you people?! -The buttcrack in Hawaii. How did this even make it into the movie? Don't they screen these things before they show them to the public? Just.... wow. At least I'll never have to watch the actual movie...
I said the same thing about swan princess,i remember seeing previews of it as a kid and never got to actually see it but nostalgia critic reviewed it and it sucks,his reviews are a good way to watch movies you've never seen and see how sucky they are
phantasmic1000 At least Swan Lake didn't have anything objectively offensive or disgusting in it, it was just boring and dumb. But here? Let's see, we have jokes about dead children, showing a 13-year old boy's bare ass, a man shooting a gun at a child, and blatant racism towards every last ethnic group imaginable. ...And this is supposed to be a family comedy?! Like, I know firsthand how deluded and nonsensical the MPAA can be, but I honestly think they allowed this shit _because_ it was a dream. Which doesn't make it excusable at all whatsoever, but...well, MPAA. Insert joke about incompetence here.
Maybe that's what North subconsciously thinks about Texans Given the sex abuse scandals in Hollywood, it kinda makes sense if you retcon your thinking these old scenes from the 70's to 2000's
+Squidzilian 〈///=~ If North wanted to find the perfect parents he wouldn't have had to look very far. Just head down to Mexico where Michelle Rodreguiz and Danny Trejo are the most awesome parents ever...no, wait, the film is trying to be culturally insensitive.
Kevin O'Brien Eh, it's been worse. There was a joke about the author of To Kill A Mockingbird in the second Diary of a Wimpy Kid book and she died hours after I first read the book.
yes the Nazi jokes can go through the roof damn I wish they did that cause then I would travel to Germany watch it with some joes I meet and then we all would demolish millions of copies of the film together live on de world wide web! XD
Ooh, that would be fun! And they could have come to Australia, where all the wild life wants to kill humans, everyone is like Steve Irwin from The Crocodile Hunter (Not that that's a bad thing, I used to watch his show all the time), and everyone says "CRIKEY" and "MATE." :D
Or to England, where everyone is a pompous ass, has bad teeth, and drink tea every day at 6. Or to Scotland, where everyone wears plaid skirts, eats haggis, and fuck sheep. Or perhaps to dear-old Ireland where everyone smells of grass soap, eat Lucky Charms, smoke, and are drunk 24 hours of the day. If I could only think of a good Welsh stereotype. Then I would've mocked the entire currant British Empire. But I just can't think of anything bad to say about Wales.
I think the whole "whistling the theme from Andy Griffith" comes from the fact that the actual title of the music is "The Fishin' Hole". BTW, the Amish couple are actually played by Alexander Godunov and Kelly McGillis. The same actors who played the couple in Witness. That's reasonably cute, I suppose
I hate to defend this film, but it makes sense as a dream. An imaginative kid with a unfortunately limited view of the real world just makes it up from what he does know.
Sydney Slaughter I thought the same thing actually, if you view the whole film through this perspective it's actually fine, in a 'EDUCATE KIDS SO THAT THEY DON'T END UP THINKING LIKE THIS' kind of way. Unfortunately, the makers haven't made it clear enough it appears.
You know, it just occurred to me that maybe the cop-out "it's-a-dream" ending, while still god-awful, wasn't entirely out of nowhere in retrospect. That bit where it looked like North was on "hallucinogenic brownies" was really him nodding off. It's still stupid, nonetheless, given that it was VERY unclear. Hell, the whole dreaming thing might actually explain all the racial stereotypes throughout the film. He's a kid who is most likely ignorant of what those cultures and people are really like, and merely bases it on, of course, unreliable details. And it explains the incomprehensibility of virtually everything else in the film, like the Bruce Willis stalker, the comatose of the parents, that Dick Cheney kid gaining such immense power, the crappy judge, etc. If that was the real reason as to why the movie is the way it is...It certainly explains it, but it's inexcusable. That possible explanation doesn't excuse such mean-spirited tripe. Hell, it actually makes the film's titular character look even more cold-hearted than he probably already is.
i think the ending originally went like this: "mom! dad! phew...so it was alllll a dream!" "actually son this is the dream. your on the floor hallucinating due to bloodloss" *cuts to him on the floor* "oh"
It's rare to find a legit child actor doing so well with his given roll, but why this movie of all things? This wasn't even a movie in my eyes. This whole thing sounds like a 2 part episode of American Dad with Steve as North.
Sanji San The racial stereotypes, tendency to be mean spirited and refusal to be funny elements of the movie are in no way like American Dad. It seems more like Family Guy. It sadly makes too much sense. 😑
This movie is such a shit, no wonder it's never shown in any movie channel.I would've felt better if I didn't know it existed. This guy directed 'A Few Good Men' and this is what he gives just 2 years later.
Apparently, the guy who wrote the novel it's based on also wrote the screenplay. And we all know how well it turns out when authors write their own film adaptations..._coughStevenKingcough_
It must be bad enough not to be shown on any movie channels. And there have been plenty of bad movies shown on movie channels. The first Uwe Boll movie I saw was on a TV movie channel.
***** Even Biodome gets shown on this one channel where I am every once and awhile, in fact its 90's month or its going to be on that channel so they're going to play Biodome as part of it, not once have I ever seen North, not even in stores.
Airplane is an older movie that most people wouldn't have seen unless their parents had it (like mine). not to mention it has one of the most amazing actors of all times, Leslie Nelson, may he rest in peace.
Of course it's all stereotypes. The mind of an upper middle class white kid who's probably never been outside his hometown. How's he gonna know any better?
A great review. My only two critisisms are; 1, yes, people can have anxiety attacks from being in close proximity to people who are arguing (This is one reason why I avoid conflict) and 2, ... was that comment about Scarlett Johanson's ass REALLY necessary? It's just creepy to have someone see a child actor and basically say "Man, I can't wait until I can sexually objectify you without it being illegal." Now just in case anyone wants to fly off the handle, I'm SURE Doug was being ironic, but it's still gross.
That second part is completely wrong. In the future, she is hot... he is refereeing to her later work, he's not talking about the girl, he doesn't want to look at the girl sexually, he just knows that that girl in the future is very hot... it has no tie to pedophilia, I don't understand why you think that... ._.
I know he didn't mean anything by it (trust me if I actually thought he was condoning pedophilia I would have gotten a LOT angrier,) it's just the whole idea that little girls only exist to become hot women and we're all just counting down the days until it's legal to bang them. So yeah, it's not about him telling that joke, per se, it's just the larger social constructs that type of humour feeds off of.
My uncle was in a foster home in an Amish community and he said the family was the nicest he had ever met. Of course in the 1970's the foster care system wasn't the best.... let's be honest, though, it still isn't...
I will give this movie a total score of 3%: Reason being? Everything was executed horribly the jokes were stale, etc. and etc. I will however commend it for 1, having bruce willis in it (which explains the 2.9% it gets), and the .1% of it it gets for it's strong message: it was shown and edited HORRIFYINGLY TO THE POINT OF SCARY T_T, but the message was a bit of a sweet little thing about how "no family is perfect, but your family is better than nothing"........or something along the lines, Idk, i had to get pretty high to write something positive about this.......
I'm thinking that joke with the texans is that they were trying to build up that they killed their son by feeding him so much but then he didnt die from that but a stampede,its still a really really bad joke and it's very horrible and morbid as fuck but at least that's trying to find the bad joke in this bad movie
North should of stayed with Dan Aykroyd and Reba. He could of married Betsy Lou! haha jk. They would of been cool as hell parents, rich as hell cattlemen/oil men, and would of let him do whatever he wanted. Hell, he could of been Texas governor and possibly president. Sounds familiar... Like a certain ex-alcoholic, cokehead president we once had... haha
I just realized that noticed that Richard Belzer who plays Sgt John Munch in Law & Order SVU. He's the guy in the Eskimo scene that is trying to move the line along... great now two actors I love I'll never be able to look at the same way again.
Anyone else notice how the parents aren't eally fighting at the beginning? They're not even talking to each other, they're just going on about stuff and not paying attention to what the other is saying.
omg this movie is horrible, however it was so bad and the jokes were so horrible, that i actually laughed at some of the jokes haha the "the defense now rests joke" actually got a giggle out of me. Needless to say i'm ashamed :(
I think theres a slight misinterpretation of the film here the reason there are so many shameful stereotypes throughout the film is because it was the kids dream all along, and the kid knows nothing about other cultures apart from the stereotypes about them stll a horrible film but that's at least the angle they were going for
***** he's always lives where he has, being a prodigy just means he is incredibly intelligent, not knowledgeable, he can't know what he hasn't be told or taught or even seen with his own eyes. if he hasn't seen other cultures of been taught in chool about each one he drempt about, he has only stereotypes to rely on
Wow. This has got to be the worst review I have ever seen in my life. I love Doug and have been a fan for long time and saw this one only now and I was cringing throughout the whole review. He absolutely missed the point of this great movie and I suspect that everyone who hates this movie makes the same mistake. And it perplexes me vastly. Is it really that hard to understand that it all happened in his dream and was a reflection of how he saw the world? Of course everythng in this movie is childish, stereotypical and over the top, it's from a perspective of a kid. If anything this movie actually clearly states that people should never ever think in stereotypes, kids should be grateful for their families since these people gave them so many years of their lives and parents should cherish their kids more. And all of the big actors in this movie understood the concept very well. One of the greatest family movies ever. Amazing message for people who can see it.
TheAirBear2000 Where does it say that? you did not just ask me that. The whole movie while he was asleep was grotesque for this very reason. It showed how people judge each other using stereotypes. Specifically in mind of a kid who doesn't really know anything about the world but already has certain stereotypes forced by society and media.
Daniel Korolev ". . . a kid who doesn't really know anything about the world . . ." Except he's explicitly depicted as a child prodigy. One would think he'd have a much better understanding of other cultures because of that. Maybe he doesn't, but as far as I can tell (although granted I haven't seen the movie) there's no indication of that.
Daniel Korolev I can easily see that this is all a dream, a fantasy. However it's still incredibly unappealing to me simply because there's no creativity in this. Having a child character make a fantasy for the majority of the film should include some CREATIVITY, not constant stereotypes. A kid can know stereotypes, but they know their imagination way more. This movie clearly doesn't understand what a 'kid' really is, and it feels more and more like a failed attempt. North is old enough to know what people really are like in Texas, he's also old enough to understand that whole business with Alaskans would be INCREDIBLY insulting and illogical being that there was no redemption or humor to that scene, and kids are WAY smarter and stupider at the same time when it comes to making jokes. A child's fantasy isn't supposed to be filled with dumb little stereotypes, poorly written jokes, and constant mean spirited humor that doesn't add to anything. A child's fantasy involves creativity, invisible or visible freedom, and emotions of all kinds. Look at Peter Pan; the Indians (Or native americans? I don't recall) were still full of pride, still strong, and interesting to look at as well as energetic. Sure they're stereotypes and likely factually incorrect, but we forgive that because it offered us more than just an insulting, stereotypical depiction and absolutely NO cruel mocking jokes. The viewer wants to respect the Indians (or native americans) in that movie, as well as enjoy their time with them, whereas this movie went out of it's way to insult cultures not just stereotypically, but actually INSULTing people. How is a fat, dead son and a random musical number in Texas supposed to be amusing? I'm actually curious to see how you enjoy it. North went through the same exact setup with the same insensitive jokes in his fantasy. Because this movie provided nothing but insults, and a moral that is overdone in just about every cartoon and movie out there. That's why a lot of folks like Doug do not like this movie. Cultures and people and even the mind of children were all insulted by this movie, as kids do not just imagine random stereotypes, ESPECIALLY kids that were supposedly a prodigy and smarter than this. After all, Doug has no problem with the child-like way that North divorced his parents! The jokes needed to be more than stereotypical insults, because when it comes down to it, this movie replayed the same setup numerous times. I can take your word for it, and feel free to enjoy the movie yourself, but in my opinion, there are WAAAY better movies out there when it comes to family comedies. If you wanted a slightly mean spirited yet energetic comedy than that's fine, but do NOT go around claiming that this movie is objectively 'good' for children and families to watch together, nor is this movie better than some other good movies.
What a cast! Elijah Wood, Jason Alexander, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Jon Lovitz, Alan Arkin, Dan Aykroyd, Reba McEntire, Kathy Bates, Richard Belzer, Ben Stein, John Ritter, Scarlett Johansson and Bruce FUCKING Willis.
Just one thing- eskimo is actually a kind of offensive term. There are some tribes who don't mind but Inuit and Yupik find it to be a pejorative. So it's better to use Yupik, Aleut or Inuit if you aren't sure.
Man, if I was the Judge in that scene when the Defense Attorney said "Your Honor... The defense rests." I would have looked at him with a disappointed look and said "Mister... That has got to be the WORST pun (Joke) that I have ever heard!"
I didn't realize the guy ushering all the old people onto the ice floes is Richard Belzer. How much money was Munch paid to pretend to be an Eskimo?? I mean, Homicide: Life on the Street was still on when this movie came out, right?
I feel so sorry for all the actors that got roped into this, especially Elijah. Poor kid who KNOWS how many mental scars he carried (and probably still dose) after being in this?
Everybody making fun of Willis as a bunny, he DID have a reason. He said it was his job at the store, and it was apparently around Easter. He also mentioned dressing as Santa when the position was available. Still funny that they managed to put him in there though.
I'm really surprised you didn't make any jokes about the Hawaiian family's last name. Didn't even mention it - I giggled in anticipation as soon as I heard it.
I've spotted another joke in texas meal scene! They said that their son used to eat more for a day than any other person would eat for a month - and tha't why he hated February. You know - he hated the shortest month in the year because he had been getting less... food.. in a day... for a month...
Screw this movie
I was wondering what the significance of February was. I knew there had to be some joke there I missed. Thanks!
But yeah, fuck this movie.
Rocco siffredi Just my opinion here, but that seemed uncalled for and needlessly rude.
***** Ok dude.
Rocco siffredi 'you an idiot'
A Bottle Of Scrumpy And you pretty know A LOT about idiots ;)
It just amazes me how Elijah Wood looks exactly the same now at age 30 or so as he did when he was 12.
It's called McCauley Culkin (I spelled that wrong) syndrome.
Who are you?
I'm the Easter bunny :D
"And I'm a hobbit, blow me."
Goddammit, this is way funnier than it's supposed to be X'D
Sorry, I died when Elijah screamed, "My CRACK?!"
That part with the Worst Joke Ever... I didn't even realize that was supposed to be a joke.
OK, I'll give it credit - the Amish "Floor it!" line got a legitimate laugh out of me.
I've had panic attacks brought on by arguing.. but that's a mental health issue and it's nothing like it's portrayed. Anyway, another thing to add to the offensive list of this movie.
i think the "be our hostage" song is a big lipped alligator moment
I think Gene Siskel summoned this movie up the perfectly, he said and I quote "This is first class junk!"
Wow, dead son jokes, barren wife jokes, horrid stereo types, how mean spirited can this movie get?
I do hope Elijah later encouraged the Uruk-Hai cast members to hunt down the director and producers of this movie…
"Find the bad movie! Find the bad movie!"
***** "You will taste hack-flesh!" :P
I'm also hoping that Kathy Bates went all Annie Wilkes on the writer of this movie.
FIND ROB SCHNEIDER!!! (Uruk Hai voice)
What REALLY shocks me here was the director who worked on North. I'm looking at this review and thinking "how could Rob Reiner, the man who directed the timeless classic The Princess Bride...make this piece of garbage?"
PB had heart, comedic timing, memorable lines/scenes/characters and a touching story. North is a sort of film Friedberg and Seltzer would make
Agreed but they're both equal in being cinematic garbage
Not to mention This Is Spinal Tap, which Roger Ebert would ironicly put in his "Great Movies" list.
*****
But even fans openly despise North
And Reiner says he loved this movie. He said this about the movie in an interview with Archive of American TV:
"I loved doing it, and some of the best jokes I ever had in a movie, are in that movie. I made this little fable, and people got mad at me, because, you know, I had done When Harry Met Sally..., and Misery, and A Few Good Men, and everybody said 'Oh, it should be a more important kind of movie.' I said, 'Why? Why can't you just make a little slice of a fable or something?'"
@sadlobster1
The cherry on top of this creative wasteland of a movie is the "It was all a dream" plot twist at the end
I wasn't surprised it was a dream, after all the movie was so goofy and nonsensical, it HAD to be dream. No one in real life can be as dumb as the people in this film. A fucking minor can't separate himself from his parents. The only way that would happen is if CPS was called in to investigate, and confirmed claims of neglect or abuse. From then on, he'd go straight to the foster care system, not a family of his own choosing.
That my child is called "Lazy Writing."
Mark Brockington
Truer words were never spoken. As annoying as he was, Bruce Willis was the only likeable character.
I doubt even M. Night would use a twist like that.
I'm just gobsmacked that they thought they could get away with all the racist stereotypes they crammed in by falling back on that tired ol' trope. Well, they did not. So at least there's some hope left for humanity.
I think the Texas joke is when they say "He could eat more than anybody in a month." and Reba replies, "That's why he hated February." is because February is a leap year and he can't eat as much because it's missing a day.
Thanx, I was trying to figure out that so called joke. Still, not funny.
+Arctic Prowl Leap year means you have an extra day. The joke is that February is the shortest month
+Holder Bee either way it's still not funny... but thanks for correcting me. :D
+Arctic Prowl That's one of the two jokes told in that segment. Nostalgia Critic got one, the "Mighty big loss" but missed the one you pointed out, that Buck hated February because it only has 28 or 29 days, unlike the others which have 30-31 which means he couldn't eat as much as he wanted to in that month.
Y
12:15 Isn't that what Adam Sandler does with every movie?
No
Oh Yeah!
... And Disney is worried about Song of the South? 😕
I usually enjoy Rob Reiner's work, especially films like Stand By Me, and Misery so I have absolutely no idea why he would do this
Every good director has some stinkers in his career. Reiner had "North", Brian de Palma had "Bonfire of the Vanities", George Miller (of "Mad Max" fame) had "Happy Feet" (both)...
@@darwincity happy feet was okay...i think?.....i haven't seen it since i was a child so don't take my word i guess.
@@caliscearleon9540 I liked happy feet for the message. I liked it to be honest. I thought it was good. Basically, being different makes you an outcast usually. So it was nice seeing a movie embrace that more. That standing out isn't a bad thing.
Damn it's crazy watching these old reviews. I'd never thought that I'd feel nostalgic for the nostalgia critic.
Elijah Wood is such a talented actor and perhaps one of the most talented child actors ever. The thing is that when he was a kid, he seemed like an adult (even though he looked AND STILL looks like a kid)... It's weird to hear a 12 year old kid talk like a 40 year old.
I had actually never heard of this movie until I watched this review. The two things from this review that stuck out to me the most were:
-The Texans singing, dancing and laughing over their dead, obese son. Your son is dead. Why are you happy and singing about it? What is wrong with you people?!
-The buttcrack in Hawaii. How did this even make it into the movie? Don't they screen these things before they show them to the public? Just.... wow.
At least I'll never have to watch the actual movie...
I said the same thing about swan princess,i remember seeing previews of it as a kid and never got to actually see it but nostalgia critic reviewed it and it sucks,his reviews are a good way to watch movies you've never seen and see how sucky they are
phantasmic1000 At least Swan Lake didn't have anything objectively offensive or disgusting in it, it was just boring and dumb. But here? Let's see, we have jokes about dead children, showing a 13-year old boy's bare ass, a man shooting a gun at a child, and blatant racism towards every last ethnic group imaginable. ...And this is supposed to be a family comedy?!
Like, I know firsthand how deluded and nonsensical the MPAA can be, but I honestly think they allowed this shit _because_ it was a dream. Which doesn't make it excusable at all whatsoever, but...well, MPAA. Insert joke about incompetence here.
Amelia Bee oh wait i meant swan princess,but its the same thing basically
Amelia Bee
I think The Swan princess is harmless
Maybe that's what North subconsciously thinks about Texans
Given the sex abuse scandals in Hollywood, it kinda makes sense if you retcon your thinking these old scenes from the 70's to 2000's
This movie has more stereotypes then a punch-out game.
+Squidzilian 〈///=~ If North wanted to find the perfect parents he wouldn't have had to look very far. Just head down to Mexico where Michelle Rodreguiz and Danny Trejo are the most awesome parents ever...no, wait, the film is trying to be culturally insensitive.
That's my Rayquaza's name! Mr. Delta!
And the stereotypes are more insulting than the ones in Hetalia. At least that show doesn't try to pass itself off as family friendly.
I'm incredibly awful for watching this review hours before finding that Abe Vigoda died. That's fucked up foreshadowing.
Kevin O'Brien Eh, it's been worse. There was a joke about the author of To Kill A Mockingbird in the second Diary of a Wimpy Kid book and she died hours after I first read the book.
why didn't come to Germany : we only eat sausages, drink beer and are racialy insensitive...i can think up a Million of jokes ^^
yes the Nazi jokes can go through the roof damn I wish they did that cause then I would travel to Germany watch it with some joes I meet and then we all would demolish millions of copies of the film together live on de world wide web! XD
Ooh, that would be fun! And they could have come to Australia, where all the wild life wants to kill humans, everyone is like Steve Irwin from The Crocodile Hunter (Not that that's a bad thing, I used to watch his show all the time), and everyone says "CRIKEY" and "MATE." :D
They sorta made fun of scots, germans, and jews in the scene where he goes to visit his dad at the pants place.
ou riiighto. did not niticed that scene. but c'mon, you can exploid sooo much moooore about germans and....the rest
Or to England, where everyone is a pompous ass, has bad teeth, and drink tea every day at 6.
Or to Scotland, where everyone wears plaid skirts, eats haggis, and fuck sheep.
Or perhaps to dear-old Ireland where everyone smells of grass soap, eat Lucky Charms, smoke, and are drunk 24 hours of the day.
If I could only think of a good Welsh stereotype. Then I would've mocked the entire currant British Empire. But I just can't think of anything bad to say about Wales.
I think after this I am more broken than Sonic 06.
GhostOfVegeta 06 was better then this.
Just think with Bruce Willis narrating and Elijah Wood, Sin City might be a sequel to North. ?
lol nice one
Even including the "balls musching scene"... i dont think cin city is as disgusting
North becoming a cannibal serial killer makes so much sense.
Never seen the film but just by looking at this, you gotta appreciate woods acting. I love it.
I think the whole "whistling the theme from Andy Griffith" comes from the fact that the actual title of the music is "The Fishin' Hole".
BTW, the Amish couple are actually played by Alexander Godunov and Kelly McGillis. The same actors who played the couple in Witness. That's reasonably cute, I suppose
Imagine if North went to Poland...
"You'll like being our son...I just got promoted to head of screen door research at the submarine factory!"
Wut?
Marcin Żmuda Well,considering Hawaii,Alaska and France were represented in this movie...
snarkus63 Still... Wut?
Antyhumanista you don't get it because it's a "North type" of joke
What does that mean? I'm from Poland and I don't get it.
"Excuse me, but what does this have to do with my crack?!" That KILLED me with laughter!!
14:45 nostalgia critic's face here always makes me laugh
"Now we'll get to see why his last name is Wood"
Best line in the episode
Heheh, he got me with the Art Vandelay one
Im from Alaska and we have never pushed our old people out to the ocean to die
The Inuit did, although only rarely. See Wikipedia -> Senicide.
I know we did at some point in history I'm just saying we have not done it in the past two centuries and not an everyday occurrence like in this movie
I hate to defend this film, but it makes sense as a dream. An imaginative kid with a unfortunately limited view of the real world just makes it up from what he does know.
Sydney Slaughter I thought the same thing actually, if you view the whole film through this perspective it's actually fine, in a 'EDUCATE KIDS SO THAT THEY DON'T END UP THINKING LIKE THIS' kind of way. Unfortunately, the makers haven't made it clear enough it appears.
There is nothing about this movie to defend
I hope the actors in this movie were at least paid really well
You know, it just occurred to me that maybe the cop-out "it's-a-dream" ending, while still god-awful, wasn't entirely out of nowhere in retrospect. That bit where it looked like North was on "hallucinogenic brownies" was really him nodding off. It's still stupid, nonetheless, given that it was VERY unclear.
Hell, the whole dreaming thing might actually explain all the racial stereotypes throughout the film. He's a kid who is most likely ignorant of what those cultures and people are really like, and merely bases it on, of course, unreliable details. And it explains the incomprehensibility of virtually everything else in the film, like the Bruce Willis stalker, the comatose of the parents, that Dick Cheney kid gaining such immense power, the crappy judge, etc.
If that was the real reason as to why the movie is the way it is...It certainly explains it, but it's inexcusable. That possible explanation doesn't excuse such mean-spirited tripe. Hell, it actually makes the film's titular character look even more cold-hearted than he probably already is.
Yeah. And possibly the type of arrogant, bigoted quack, that would be associated with FOX News' audience in later years.
i think the ending originally went like this: "mom! dad! phew...so it was alllll a dream!"
"actually son this is the dream. your on the floor hallucinating due to bloodloss"
*cuts to him on the floor*
"oh"
It's rare to find a legit child actor doing so well with his given roll, but why this movie of all things? This wasn't even a movie in my eyes. This whole thing sounds like a 2 part episode of American Dad with Steve as North.
Sanji San The racial stereotypes, tendency to be mean spirited and refusal to be funny elements of the movie are in no way like American Dad. It seems more like Family Guy. It sadly makes too much sense. 😑
This movie is such a shit, no wonder it's never shown in any movie channel.I would've felt better if I didn't know it existed. This guy directed 'A Few Good Men' and this is what he gives just 2 years later.
Apparently, the guy who wrote the novel it's based on also wrote the screenplay. And we all know how well it turns out when authors write their own film adaptations..._coughStevenKingcough_
It must be bad enough not to be shown on any movie channels. And there have been plenty of bad movies shown on movie channels. The first Uwe Boll movie I saw was on a TV movie channel.
***** Even Biodome gets shown on this one channel where I am every once and awhile, in fact its 90's month or its going to be on that channel so they're going to play Biodome as part of it, not once have I ever seen North, not even in stores.
FaceUnreality
Well at least the Uwe Boll movie I saw on TV had more dignity then North or Biodome.
I was shown on Fox Family Channel years ago before it became ABC Family.
Airplane is an older movie that most people wouldn't have seen unless their parents had it (like mine). not to mention it has one of the most amazing actors of all times, Leslie Nelson, may he rest in peace.
Elijah Wood was so adorable as a kid
Seeing Willis' face during the fedex scene, he probably wasn't acting
Thanks!
I smiled when the plane touched the window. maybe it's the sound that's funny here ^^
17:20
Oh. My. God. That Amish dad is Karl the terrorist who gets back up after being hanged by chains in Die Hard.
I guessing that was supposed to be a reference to Witness
Did you literally miss the February joke? Oh my god, you missed the February joke.
I thought joke #4 was the most cleaver. lol awesome review Doug. Thanks for the laughs.
The plane touching the window is the funniest part of any movie ever.
Being from Texas, that is pretty offensive!
Glad they didn't insult Hollywood intelligence ......oh wait it was this movie
Of course it's all stereotypes. The mind of an upper middle class white kid who's probably never been outside his hometown. How's he gonna know any better?
This is truly one of the most hilarious reviews the NC ever did.
The person who said "Loosen his pants" is Jason Alexander. He played George on Seinfeld. Art Vandilay is the name he uses in Seinfeld as an alias.
What was so bad about the "prefect" family North? Were they Mormon or something? I guess he was missing his real parents but jeez...
Nah, he just found them boring.
Wait so why was Bruce Willis in the bunny suit? That's the real question of this movie.
The attractiveness of a fat pay-check, or a bizarre bet to try and scrape the bottom of his career by outdoing Bonfire of the Vanities...
it takes a full episode to go one step beyond.
The actress who played Mrs. Ho is Lauren Tom who voiced Amy Wong from Futurama, Dana Tan from Batman Beyond, and Minh & Connie from King of the hill.
A great review. My only two critisisms are; 1, yes, people can have anxiety attacks from being in close proximity to people who are arguing (This is one reason why I avoid conflict) and 2, ... was that comment about Scarlett Johanson's ass REALLY necessary? It's just creepy to have someone see a child actor and basically say "Man, I can't wait until I can sexually objectify you without it being illegal." Now just in case anyone wants to fly off the handle, I'm SURE Doug was being ironic, but it's still gross.
She was ten when this film was made. ....Yep.
That second part is completely wrong.
In the future, she is hot... he is refereeing to her later work, he's not talking about the girl, he doesn't want to look at the girl sexually, he just knows that that girl in the future is very hot... it has no tie to pedophilia, I don't understand why you think that... ._.
I know he didn't mean anything by it (trust me if I actually thought he was condoning pedophilia I would have gotten a LOT angrier,) it's just the whole idea that little girls only exist to become hot women and we're all just counting down the days until it's legal to bang them. So yeah, it's not about him telling that joke, per se, it's just the larger
social constructs that type of humour feeds off of.
My uncle was in a foster home in an Amish community and he said the family was the nicest he had ever met. Of course in the 1970's the foster care system wasn't the best.... let's be honest, though, it still isn't...
why am i watching these things? i have watched this thing for million times.
Yeah, how can anyone miss that? The moment the screen swirled, I knew it was going to turn out to be just a dream.
I will give this movie a total score of 3%: Reason being? Everything was executed horribly the jokes were stale, etc. and etc. I will however commend it for 1, having bruce willis in it (which explains the 2.9% it gets), and the .1% of it it gets for it's strong message: it was shown and edited HORRIFYINGLY TO THE POINT OF SCARY T_T, but the message was a bit of a sweet little thing about how "no family is perfect, but your family is better than nothing"........or something along the lines, Idk, i had to get pretty high to write something positive about this.......
I'm thinking that joke with the texans is that they were trying to build up that they killed their son by feeding him so much but then he didnt die from that but a stampede,its still a really really bad joke and it's very horrible and morbid as fuck but at least that's trying to find the bad joke in this bad movie
Because joking about a child who died horrifically by trampling is hilarious, amirite?
Amelia Bee Or little boy cracks
phantasmic1000 Aloha
Metal Man What do you mean, "I'm fired"?
From a person who grew up in the Midwest and met dozens of people from Texas, that's exceptionally accurate.
I went to see this movie in theaters and was so appalled I walked out almost instantly.
They should have hired Phoenix Wright.
OBJECTION!
Lol "This movie is pure evil"
I'm not bothering to see this film!
I just figured out who Ebert's face keeps reminding me of -- Jim Ross! He talks like he has Bell's palsy.
he had a stroke
(22:43) What,is he kidding?
Look how many "famous names" they got for "Movie 43"!!!!!!!!!
right, because north and movie 43 are of the same quality and are sending the same message. so happy i do not have your twisted simple mind.
mymagicification The same quality?Definitely no.
The same notion that casting famous actors automatically makes a film good...yes.
subjective dribble. i find you stupid now fuck off.
mymagicification My,what an intelligent and well-thought response.
***** I can't argue with that...in direct contrast to much of the "North" cast.
North should of stayed with Dan Aykroyd and Reba. He could of married Betsy Lou! haha jk. They would of been cool as hell parents, rich as hell cattlemen/oil men, and would of let him do whatever he wanted. Hell, he could of been Texas governor and possibly president. Sounds familiar... Like a certain ex-alcoholic, cokehead president we once had... haha
I just realized that noticed that Richard Belzer who plays Sgt John Munch in Law & Order SVU. He's the guy in the Eskimo scene that is trying to move the line along... great now two actors I love I'll never be able to look at the same way again.
Anyone else notice how the parents aren't eally fighting at the beginning? They're not even talking to each other, they're just going on about stuff and not paying attention to what the other is saying.
omg this movie is horrible, however it was so bad and the jokes were so horrible, that i actually laughed at some of the jokes haha the "the defense now rests joke" actually got a giggle out of me. Needless to say i'm ashamed :(
It's so bad it's funny, I guess.
I chuckled a little bit when he leaves the Amish people because it was so stupid and such an asshole moment. :)
I think theres a slight misinterpretation of the film here
the reason there are so many shameful stereotypes throughout the film is because it was the kids dream all along, and the kid knows nothing about other cultures apart from the stereotypes about them
stll a horrible film but that's at least the angle they were going for
*****
he's always lives where he has, being a prodigy just means he is incredibly intelligent, not knowledgeable, he can't know what he hasn't be told or taught or even seen with his own eyes. if he hasn't seen other cultures of been taught in chool about each one he drempt about, he has only stereotypes to rely on
Where have you been? he's back now :D
I love how he used a Top Ten List. Proof that North isn't even worthy of that one step beyond.
Wow. This has got to be the worst review I have ever seen in my life. I love Doug and have been a fan for long time and saw this one only now and I was cringing throughout the whole review. He absolutely missed the point of this great movie and I suspect that everyone who hates this movie makes the same mistake.
And it perplexes me vastly. Is it really that hard to understand that it all happened in his dream and was a reflection of how he saw the world? Of course everythng in this movie is childish, stereotypical and over the top, it's from a perspective of a kid. If anything this movie actually clearly states that people should never ever think in stereotypes, kids should be grateful for their families since these people gave them so many years of their lives and parents should cherish their kids more. And all of the big actors in this movie understood the concept very well.
One of the greatest family movies ever. Amazing message for people who can see it.
". . . this movie actually clearly states that people should never ever think in stereotypes, . . ."
OK, I'll bite. _Where_ does it say that?
TheAirBear2000 Where does it say that? you did not just ask me that.
The whole movie while he was asleep was grotesque for this very reason. It showed how people judge each other using stereotypes. Specifically in mind of a kid who doesn't really know anything about the world but already has certain stereotypes forced by society and media.
Daniel Korolev ". . . a kid who doesn't really know anything about the world . . ."
Except he's explicitly depicted as a child prodigy. One would think he'd have a much better understanding of other cultures because of that. Maybe he doesn't, but as far as I can tell (although granted I haven't seen the movie) there's no indication of that.
he can be a little Einstein and still know nothing about the world. He is a kid. Frustrated and afraid. Watch the movie, it's good
Daniel Korolev
I can easily see that this is all a dream, a fantasy. However it's still incredibly unappealing to me simply because there's no creativity in this. Having a child character make a fantasy for the majority of the film should include some CREATIVITY, not constant stereotypes. A kid can know stereotypes, but they know their imagination way more. This movie clearly doesn't understand what a 'kid' really is, and it feels more and more like a failed attempt.
North is old enough to know what people really are like in Texas, he's also old enough to understand that whole business with Alaskans would be INCREDIBLY insulting and illogical being that there was no redemption or humor to that scene, and kids are WAY smarter and stupider at the same time when it comes to making jokes.
A child's fantasy isn't supposed to be filled with dumb little stereotypes, poorly written jokes, and constant mean spirited humor that doesn't add to anything. A child's fantasy involves creativity, invisible or visible freedom, and emotions of all kinds. Look at Peter Pan; the Indians (Or native americans? I don't recall) were still full of pride, still strong, and interesting to look at as well as energetic. Sure they're stereotypes and likely factually incorrect, but we forgive that because it offered us more than just an insulting, stereotypical depiction and absolutely NO cruel mocking jokes. The viewer wants to respect the Indians (or native americans) in that movie, as well as enjoy their time with them, whereas this movie went out of it's way to insult cultures not just stereotypically, but actually INSULTing people. How is a fat, dead son and a random musical number in Texas supposed to be amusing? I'm actually curious to see how you enjoy it.
North went through the same exact setup with the same insensitive jokes in his fantasy. Because this movie provided nothing but insults, and a moral that is overdone in just about every cartoon and movie out there. That's why a lot of folks like Doug do not like this movie. Cultures and people and even the mind of children were all insulted by this movie, as kids do not just imagine random stereotypes, ESPECIALLY kids that were supposedly a prodigy and smarter than this. After all, Doug has no problem with the child-like way that North divorced his parents! The jokes needed to be more than stereotypical insults, because when it comes down to it, this movie replayed the same setup numerous times.
I can take your word for it, and feel free to enjoy the movie yourself, but in my opinion, there are WAAAY better movies out there when it comes to family comedies. If you wanted a slightly mean spirited yet energetic comedy than that's fine, but do NOT go around claiming that this movie is objectively 'good' for children and families to watch together, nor is this movie better than some other good movies.
What a terrible looking movie.
lmfaoo this video had me crying
It's not like he's dead or anything, He still is great.
Although he did promise NC Specials every now and then..
Hoping for a christmas one.
What a cast! Elijah Wood, Jason Alexander, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Jon Lovitz, Alan Arkin, Dan Aykroyd, Reba McEntire, Kathy Bates, Richard Belzer, Ben Stein, John Ritter, Scarlett Johansson and
Bruce FUCKING Willis.
I love this movie so much I’m serious it’s one of the greatest movies of all time IMO
For what it's worth, I can actually find the humor in some of these jokes.
"Your [fat] son died? I'm sorry"
"Needless to say, it was a BIG loss"
just watching the NC review this made my eye twitch and it wont stop @.@
plain hitting the window was just priceless
"FIND THE HALFLING" oh my gosh I'm dying XD
"Loosen his pants" He was in the pool!
16:08-- "READ A FUCKING BOOK!!"
CONGRATULATIONS!! YOU WIN ANOTHER 17 AND A HALF MINUTES OF NOSTALGIA CRITIC MAKING FUN OF YOUR MOVIE!!
Just one thing- eskimo is actually a kind of offensive term. There are some tribes who don't mind but Inuit and Yupik find it to be a pejorative.
So it's better to use Yupik, Aleut or Inuit if you aren't sure.
Man, if I was the Judge in that scene when the Defense Attorney said "Your Honor... The defense rests." I would have looked at him with a disappointed look and said "Mister... That has got to be the WORST pun (Joke) that I have ever heard!"
I didn't realize the guy ushering all the old people onto the ice floes is Richard Belzer. How much money was Munch paid to pretend to be an Eskimo?? I mean, Homicide: Life on the Street was still on when this movie came out, right?
Yup!
we'll miss yuh nostalgia critic. we'll remember it so you don't have to.
I feel so sorry for all the actors that got roped into this, especially Elijah. Poor kid who KNOWS how many mental scars he carried (and probably still dose) after being in this?
"youre too fcking nice" that joke killed me ROFLROFL
I love how Jason Alexander talks exactly like George in Seinfeld.
That boy really is a trooper.
Everybody making fun of Willis as a bunny, he DID have a reason. He said it was his job at the store, and it was apparently around Easter. He also mentioned dressing as Santa when the position was available.
Still funny that they managed to put him in there though.
I'm really surprised you didn't make any jokes about the Hawaiian family's last name. Didn't even mention it - I giggled in anticipation as soon as I heard it.