This Q&A was interrupted by a lizard, a ghost, and an adorable toddler! :) I hope you enjoyed today's video For more, visit my corresponding blogpost dailyconnoisseur.blogspot.com/2018/10/reader-q-poised-but-lonely-am-i-in.html Love, Jennifer
A B I love how honest you are about your car. My car is messy as well and I’m planning on investing in a car vacuum. I also like your advice about maintaining grace with extended family. I can definitely work on that. I look forward to your videos every week. You are a calming presence in a sometimes chaotic world. Your parents are a beautiful couple and I see where you get your beauty from. Your mother looks part Afro-Panamanian and you have a similar, beautiful exotic look. Your family is beautiful. :)
We live in an age where people who lean towards conservative values are often mocked, denigrated or dismissed in popular discourse. Jennifer you are such a classy antidote to that, a beautiful role model with a calm confidence. We need more women like you! 🌟
Im finding the world is becoming more conservative, reserved, poised. We may be few, but we are more and more each year. I feel encouraged by this observation.
One of my favorite sayings, seen on a Mary Engelbreit calendar and attributed to George Bernard Shaw: "The single biggest problem with communication is the illusion that it has taken place."
I’m a stay-at-home mom of grown kids and my nest is empty. 😩 I loved your books because it’s how I’ve always lived, but i too, have struggled with loneliness. Thankfully I’m an introvert, but it was hard when my kids were young, because most people did things differently. Over the years I’ve grown to accept it, because it’s who I am. I’m proud of the fact that I enjoy doing things that most people don’t, and I know a lot of people admire those qualities, but it’s rare that people will compliment you, and instead feel threatened. 🤷🏼♀️ You have to be who you are, especially when those things are important to you. I know my family appreciates it and that’s all that matters. ❤️
Melissa Saccoccio Thank you for saying what has also been on my heart and mind for the last few years. Unfortunately, when my children were younger, I made friends with women and became a chameleon in order for my children to have what I thought was a “normal “ childhood. Now, becoming the true authentic me has meant I actually have very little in common with my friends of the past two decades. The more I embrace this new lifestyle that I love, the more distant and lonely I feel. It’s not their fault, I’m the one who put up a facade all of these years. It’s just become increasingly difficult to maintain those life long friendships. I’m finally at a time in my life, I should be able to spend quality time with my friends and yet, I suddenly feel like a fraud because I no longer desire to live that lifestyle with women who don’t like the real me. To be with them requires the “chameleon”. Thank you for being such an inspiration to remain faithful to who I truly am and want to become.
Wow, This is exactly how I'm feeling about now! Wish you had a channel because you must have so many tips how to navigate this lifestyle! It would be wonderful to listen to someone on the other side of babies and young children, yet truly true to oneself. That's big goals for me!
Comment to the young lady whose husband left her. Divorce is like a death, you go thru hate, regret, grief, etc. Allow yourself to go thru it all. My friends told me to throw my husband's things out on the yard because of what he done. I could only do what my heart told me to do and I have no regrets. I'm not telling you it was all peachy peachy, it wasn't and I was going thru breast cancer at the same time. Years later our lives crossed many many times other than because of our 2 children and I was so glad I had done what my heart had told me. I started Bible study during this period and met so many wonderful young women who had similar problems. Try not to be vindictive, it backfires. My husband married the person he left for, went on to have 2 more children. He died of lung cancer and asked for me to come to his house during his illness to discuss life and some financial matters (to my benefit). I'm not telling you that this will be your pattern - what I'm saying is that life takes some very strange turns so try to be kind when you don't want to be and don't say ugly things in front of the children. It will pay off.
Teenage years and 20's- mocked for seeming snotty or aloof. Too old fashioned for dating norm, read books, had cats, dressed simple and spent my time exploring life. Very different morals and standards.Wore glasses and hunted down tweed jackets to wear. Tended to find me in the library, bookstores, speak softly, I avoided loud crowds. Loved going to museums, learning something about history or society, photography, etc..30's- didn't fit in with the normal mom's- I was not rich but I remember wearing lipstick one day and someone commented that I was put together. LOL I do not watch any popular tv or reality shows, I could care less about what is trendy or making sure my kid is trendy. Long walks, lots of homemade food and socializing is smaller groups or just with 1 friend. 40's- now I am quirky, kinda cool and people think I am classy! Still do the same things, bettering myself everyday. Perspective helps and people are out there. Keep being you!
Oh Jennifer, my husband and I have been married for 15 years and our biggest communication issue is still HOW we communicate! Lol And we are both from the south, just neighboring States 😜 We have literally traveled the world together, living out of backpacks, had lots of kids, and gone through the adventure of adoption and we STILL don’t get what the other is saying sometimes. But it’s rarely a huge stressor anymore b/c we have learned to laugh and joke about it and not take ourselves so seriously. The one thing we try to communicate clearly to each other is “I’m FOR you; I’m on your side” ;). Thanks for answering the questions. And I think we would all love a couples Q & A. 😉 Blessings!
@Shannon, I love your comment! Sometimes it seems like men and women really ARE from two different planets, right? 😂 Great that you and your husband can laugh about it and make things work!
When I finally left my husband the first thing I told everyone was no talking bad about their dad in front of them. The person it would hurt would be the innocent children. Ur son is adorable
I think that your background is awesome. You're part of the African Panamanian Ancestry. That accounts for brown skin and textured hair, which are both pretty. Seeing that picture of your Mom nice.
I host foreign exchange students and it’s so sad to me that your host parents didn’t respond to you! We’ve had 11 students and I’m thrilled when I hear from any of them. My absolute favorite thing is when they visit. I hope you do manage to get in touch with them someday.
Enjoyed this video. Idea I learned from my neighbor is to always bring a small bag for trash out to the car every time the children got into the car. Every time we got out of the car, we gathered any trash to throw out. Every time we came home, we placed any remaining trash into the trash bag and dropped it right into the trash can before we walked into the house. I added bringing another bag to gather anything that needed to come into the house and would hand something to everyone to put away as soon as we came in. I still do this myself now that our children are grown. It makes a big difference.
I've often wondered about that question about Madame Chic and I must say I was shocked to hear that she never corresponded to your letters and especially to your book which honored her! (Ok....mayyyyyybe I can give a pass on not replying to letters.....but a BOOK???) Wow. You're very gracious about it, Jennifer. Oh well. It has blessed you, your family, and countless readers so.....C'est la vie!
Well, there is the possibility they had already moved or that they didn’t like the idea of being the subject of a book. In that case it may be a case of if you can’t say something nice it is better to say nothing at all.
I’m Hispanic and I always wondered if you had Hispanic blood. I’m a long time subscriber since back when you wore your pearls. You were one of my first subscriptions. 💕
To the lady going through the divorce, I understand not wanting to behave badly. The question being, how do you fight for what is your fair share? The only person who needs the true ugly facts, is your attorney. Your attorney is the one responsible for fighting on your behalf and will decide when/if those ugly facts should be introduced. Best Wishes. Great video Jennifer. Thank you.
I work in Cubicle World. Everyone around me has headphones or earbuds in and are listening to something of their own choosing. I just got the Madame Chic audio book. Going to start listening now. 🙂
This was filmed almost two years ago, but it is still relevant and insightful. I honestly feel like I'm chatting with a beloved friend, almost as if you and Nikki Moreno had come round for a cup of tea and a chat!! And a slice of cake. Never forget the cake! Xxx
I am so thrilled that I discovered you. You are such a delight. I’m definitely going to continue to follow you as you have inspired me to improve on my housekeeping skills and not to become obsessed with being perfect but to enjoy the process. 💕🎉🎉
Loved the "lizard interruption"...such a real life moment. Thank you for this. You answered a few of the questions that I've had in my mind. Your son is adorable! Glad that you are feeling so well after having the baby...you look lovely. Take care! Xo
I’ve been “following” you since the earlier days of your blog, I even have your first self-published book. I appreciate your perspective so much! It’s so refreshing in an increasingly coarse world 👍🏻🌸
I have also been so inspired by becoming a Mother and have set more goals than ever before now that I have a little one. I'm really looking forward to the Marriage Q&A!
Lovely video! So happy for your new baby! They say having two boys & two girls is the ideal family because every child has at least one brother and one sister.
I’m so curious about the Chics, like everyone else I’m so fascinated with them, I’ve even dreamt about their apartment that you describe, in my mind I see Ines de La fressange as Madame chic- and I wish you could return to the chics apartment and record the whole exchange! Lol- I wish we could ask her questions as well! Haha get that french perspective :) I love your honesty about the communication in a marriage like yours, it is very common for Americans and English to have a lot in common but there is a different Lexicon between the two, my girlfriends married to Englishmen usually share a similar experience, American women don’t mind straight forward usually whereas English talk around the matter- in their view they are trusting your intelligence to get the point. Lol but Englishmen usually find American women refreshing for their openness. What a fun Q&A, I hope you do more!
The car story was so funny! I’m kind of surprised to hear the chic family never wrote anyone back. It seems like an etiquette faux pas to never acknowledge anyone.
It's so nice to see how kind you've been to that poor young woman who is struggling in Japan among friends, or perhaps former friends who aren't open to the person she is becoming, to the kind of woman she wants to be. Also it was so refreshing to hear you speak of your communication difficulties you sometimes have with your husband. I prefer a blunt style myself...It's easier to understand what's going on with someone when they're direct with you. I thoroughly enjoyed your Q&A! Thank you!
Hello Jennifer! I love the way you answered that 1st comment about being lonely after you decide to make a definite choice on who you want to be and how you will define your core values.I am married and around your age and teach a Culinary/ Domestic Art class part time to senior girls at St Mary's Academy in KS and I highly recommend all your books to my girls. This seems to be a worry/ problem with most of them but I do think they will be so much happier waiting for great friends who are like- minded and will spurn them on to be the best version of themselves!! Thankyou for all you do...we need more young women like you for this next generation of young ladies!☺(My previous girls who are now freshman in college now have discussions about your books when they visit me after class for coffee on Tuesdays) Cheers to Jennifer and Ben from Josh & Valerie( 3 children married 11 years)
When you spoke about doing a live video I immediately thought of that British man who was doing an interview from his home office. I can just picture your husband frantically trying to pull them out of the room😀😉❤️!
I believe I've lost friends over the years due to my enjoying living a chic /fine living life. I finally realized, now in my 50s, that I was lonelier when trying to hide who I was while around them vs being myself. I think that is why I have always been involved with social media from the start. PS: I know I'm replying on an old post, but I'm curious about your comment about being interrupted by "a ghost".
Motherhood looks good on you Jennifer! I am so like you when it comes to wanting to get back in the swing of things after baby arrives, I’m enjoying these last few weeks but looking forward to establishing a new routine with all three kiddos. It’s funny I talked about just that in today’s vlog 😄 Thank you for sharing your calm contentment and diligence as a thriving mama of four 💛
Hi Jennifer you killed me with the van story lol that was hysterical. What a great q and A! I just turned 57 on the 8 Th.of October. I too feel lonely as if no one understands. I don't have friends because I don't drink( at all never have) and I am very much different in how I dress, and how clean my home etc. My daughter being 16 is very busy with speech and debate, marching band and all her AP classes. I've gone to counseling but I am who I am, and at this age you are set in your ways. Thank you for your graceful videos. I so enjoy them. 🙋🏻🙅🏻👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼🤗👍🏼🍁🍂
Great video, I think you are amazing to do everything you do with four kids as well. I have two kids the same age as your girls, and wish I could achieve half what you do but it was interesting to know how much sleep you get - I certainly need a lot more sleep than you do. I am from England and I laughed about the part about Ben being not direct enough in his speech, I think this could be an Anglo/American difference, we insinuate a lot without actually saying it! I’ve never commented before but love your videos, especially wardrobe related ones, or parenting tips, so please keep up the good work. X
Congrats, Jennifer, on another sweet little child to love. I was just thinking...it wasn’t very “Madame Chic-ish” of her not to respond to all your correspondence. Interesting because I really would think that would be a courtesy she would show to people that write personal letters to her. Just an observation. I love how you said your kids inspire you. I was the same way. They gave me energy. Now I struggle with that some as an empty nester. Oh well. Life is good though, just different. Have a great day, Jennifer!
Jillluvslife Being from a country very close culturally and geographically to France, I would say this a matter of cultural difference. I have lived in the US for more than four years and I find Americans extremely friendly and warm. It is definitely not like that everywhere. My mother tongue is French and I would say that even the language reflects a certain coldness. It is nothing personal. It is just that the boundaries are different. One like to keep a little distance. It is like that in many countries in Europe and it is just the way people are. I personnally much prefer the warm, American way and the good thing is that I never take it for granted since I have been brought up differently. I think different cultures can learn from each other and while American can learn from the French in certain matters, French people can learn from Americans in this matter. I do have wonderful American friends who are showing me the way!
I'm finally catching up on some of your precious videos and this is the best "television" around, because you inspire, share how life can be rich and full in a poised and polished way and you share it with your delicious sense of humor. That was a great story about cleaning out your car (I'm still cracking up over your infectious laughter about the neighbor saying your car looked like it had been "robbed") which inspired you to tackle the job that evening. Then, to (LOL) be in the midst of a lizard invasion with your family handling it downstairs and your smoothly, with more humor, continuing on in your video recording, showing The Daily Connoisseur life in full bloom and the way it is. Thank you for being yourself, sharing yourself and helping all of us to live better quality lives. As for future Q & A's, I'm very excited to hear about your upcoming 2019 England announcement. I'm also interested in hearing about what type of cookware you decided to buy. Relating to that, I have one Staub dutch oven, in grey enamel, and while heavy, it cooks and bakes beautifully, keeping things moist and the cleanup is easy. It was so much fun to learn about your family background and see your wonderful parents. I'd also welcome another Mr. Connoisseur video with you. Whatever you offer is worth watching. Enjoy your beautiful family.
You beautiful wonderful inspiration to all new as well as seasoned moms, and childless women in general. You have brought back class---something that has been sorely missing since the 1950's-'60's. Jackie Kennedy, President Kennedy's wife our First Lady, exuded class. She was the trend setter and model of behavior during that time of history. You are a delight Jennifer. Keep up your inspirational videos of who and what women should aspire to model today. It's been lost for a very long time. Thank you for breathing life back into her.
This video title speaks to my soul!! I've been in the chic process for over a year (wow it happens in LAYERS) without even reading MC or knowing JLS's channel, and now that I've been watching your content, gosh it's like I'm understood. Will keep listening and learning. Thank you for the work that you do!
I was born and raised in France. In the USA, I felt overdressed for a long time with people saying: you look nice, where are you going? Finally, I decided to be myself and to simply reply with a smile “ thank you”😀
Thank you Jennifer! I am SO GRATEFUL you were inspired to lead a community of classy, like-minded women. Also, your hair looks so full and lovely in this video-so very Duchess Kate-like. Love it!
I loved your van story, I’ve been casually watching your videos here and there and loved the real ness of your story. And your statement about needing your husband to be very direct in his communication is something I really identify with too. Thank you for your videos!
Love you channel, just found it. One thing I would say about a 10 item wardrobe, is to consider where you live. I live in Canada, we have 4 seasons. This means that my light summer stuff will definitely not work for winter, plus the in between seasons. Plus I work in health care and have uniforms. I try and keep my seasonal stuff down to basic pieces, but has to be for each season. :)
Enjoyed this so much, Jennifer! It's always fun getting to know a bit more about you. :) And I WISH I felt industrious as well as inspired while having babies. Haha! I have all kinds of big ideas for projects I'd LIKE to pursue, but I feel like I can only keep up with the must-do tasks of the day (meals, laundry, dishes, snuggles, etc.). Seeing you do what you do is very motivating, and I'm grateful you share that with us!
Your advice to the lonely Japanese lady and the newly single mum of three was very heartfelt and sincere. I think we all have family members and in-laws who all require us to ‘paise’, as you say but sadly some of us have those who are nasty/vindictive. As I have got older I have chosen to stay away from those people for th sake of my health. A tough situation but necessary for me. Your little boy is adorable and growing so fast. I love your comment about leaving Ben to deal with the lizard ! You are glowing, regardless of the lamp. Wishing you and your family good health and love from Australia xxx
Thank you for this inspiring video. So interesting how we can live with someone (like our husbands) for more than a decade, and we're still getting to know them! And happy for you to have your wonderful new baby! xo- Cara
3 years ago I moved to a new town with my preschooler and toddler in tow. I thought I would make an effort to get involved and meet other moms so I joined a MOPS group and even helped lead. The underlying message I kept getting from people was that I dress like a CEO and not a stay at home mom and it really intimidated other women. They were little comments and remarks, such as “what are you dressed up for?” “Got a date?” “Oh wow, I should’ve dressed up too!” Innocent (mostly) but I found I couldn’t make friends bc of my dress. After 2 years I finally started purchasing more casual clothes to fit in to events where I knew I would seem to aloof or “out of their league” or better than. I know that sounds so rotten and inauthentic but I was lonely and didn’t know what else to do and I wanted to seem approachable. Well it worked. I dunno what that says about me or others but I found dressing down at certain times is as powerful as dressing up. Anyway, I understand the loneliness.
Hi Jennifer, I finally got to read your first book and will be reading the others soon. It was very relatable and surprisingly funny at times. In my van the kids and I always take anything out even if they’re not the one that brought it in. It’s just routine so we automatically do it.
Good morning Jennifer! You tackled some very interesting questions and I agree with your answers about those topics. There are people that come in and out of our lives and especially when we make changes....and for the better, we leave behind those who don't want what's best for us or value the same things and that's completely okay. That story about your van was so funny! I try to stay on top of cleaning my car out once a week as well....but it doesn't always happen, however, after someone else rides in my car or comes over to it at worship service I see my car through new eyes and that's what it takes to get it back on my list of priorities haha! Oh that lizard was causing so much fun in your house! I loved hearing your son talk, how sweet! This was an exciting video to listen to, I look forward to more! Much love to you! ~Nikki
Good morning Jennifer. I find a lot of the question relate to me! I find with family members, they have their things and I have mine. I try to stay calm and say it's ok to be different. It's nice what you do but for me, I enjoy things differently for myself.
Such good advice, about the Lady going through the divorce! I tried not to show my hurt and anger around my Daughter’s. He is their Dad and always will be!
I so enjoyed this video!!! Thank you for sharing. I am fairly new to your channel, so you did answer some of my lingering questions. You are precious! Wish I lived closer to your viewer that feels lonely. I am probably old enough to at least be her mom, but, my youngest of our 4 is 26. I truly enjoy my kids sharing their lives with hubby and i. So, maybe she will find an older friend that would be a great listener and find some fulfillment in that until her peer age group catches up with her wisdom on living a chic life. Anyway, take care Jennifer and God bless you all ~
You are precious. So glad I found your channel! Subbed. I am an empty nester and love to hear your stories especially with the children. You are so practical and sweet. And a very classy lady. ♥️
Jennifer, what a lovely video! Your presence and demeanor are not only calming, but so inspiring. I resonated with much of what you said, we have a lot in common. I am also bi-racial, my husband is from another country and we lived in his country for many years. Inside I have a book that's just waiting to burst forth. I think about it a lot and start writing it in my head every day but never get to actually writing it. I have watched your self publishing video before but I am going to watch it again and I'm also very interested in reading your books. I think they will be my Christmas present to myself. Thank you for sharing with us!
Hi Jennifer! Since you'll be spending more time in England next year, I'm wondering if you've watched Dr. Lucy Worsley's UA-cam videos on history, If Walls Could Talk, the history and evolution of the home, Henry VIII and much more! She is such fun to watch and you learn a lot.
Loved this! Thank you! My husband and I are both American, and communication is an issue for us, too. We've been married over 20years now. I think that maybe that's a universal issue for all couples? Love you and your message! Thanks for the inspiration!
Good Day Jennifer, I love your channel always having good advice.. I just wanted to share a little of my life change when I was in my early 20’s I did not care how I went out, but I did care how I went to work I was fortunately had a uniform policy that was easy, but when I was not at work, I was a mess looking back😂😂, but since I Hit my late 40’s that changed now I am in my early 50’s I think very different. This is what the generation of the 20’s and 30’s need now women like you and me to show then how to be lady like, classy chic, I would also say vintage love that style... You should turn this into a t.v show your great.. God Bless you and your passion...
I completely understand your desire to get up and do. For some people resting a lot is very stressful. I always felt I had a healthy ratio of rest and work. When I had my first child I wanted to catch up on everything I let go. Just as I was ready to relax and take it easy my sweet baby woke up and needed all the things that babies need. I was so exhausted that I learned from then on to take it more slowly. To rest if I needed to while the baby rested so I would never show up depleted just when my baby or child needed me most. Parenting is not a science, all children are different so you must be flexible, and open minded. And, above all, loving and kind but with the proper amount of firmness and consistency. We will never be perfect and neither will our children but love covers a multitude of sins; and things seem to turn out okay despite all our mistakes.
While I agree with you about not continually bad-mouthing your ex, I have also witnessed the total cover up of someone’s sin against the family backfire in the years to come. The children need to have a safe place for their own grief of this loss and sometimes grieving together is very beneficial. Remaining stoic often comes across to children as something quite different; lack of love for the ex, lack of hurt by his leaving; lack of anger for breaking up the family, etc. This can make the children feel that there’s no opportunity to express their own feelings. Also, it’s good and right to say what the ex is doing is wrong (if it’s true) We have such high standards for our children’s behavior and yet allow an ex to not be held accountable for any wrongdoing?? That sends extremely confusing messages about what is truly important. Again, I want to say that these discussions need to be age appropriate and stick to the actual facts of the leaving. No other personal stuff needed unless for their safety. Pretending the ex is not doing anything harmful doesn’t help anyone. Btw. I’ve been married for 35 years, but I have had front row seats to friend and family divorces and have seen the damage keeping silent can do. So, it’s just another perspective to pray for wisdom regarding how much to discuss with your children. Don’t assume that keeping quiet is automatically the answer. Continually Trashing the ex is NOT acceptable. That’s also extremely harmful for you and your children. My heart breaks for all of you who must endure this pain. I’m so sorry.
This video was so entertaining and cute and classy and I think I’m in love. You are a beautiful woman and you have such a good outlook on life. Bless you.
Panamanian, amazing! Do you speak any Spanish? Have you visited there? I lived a year in Panama and fell in love with the cloud forest around Boquete. : )
Absolutely loved this Q&A! Funny re sleep training -- that didn't exist when I had my daughters, but daughter 1 was sleeping all night at 5 weeks and her signal on awakening was cooing, while daughter 2 was what was referred to back then as a "colicky" baby. (Pediatrician offered a tranquillizer -- for me, not her; she was thriving while screaming. I was shocked and passed as I was nursing her, but he made his point!). So wondrous how these new individuals arrive already fully themselves, each one unique from the beginning. We get to know them and guide them but they are each their own person from the beginning!
Hi Jennifer! I enjoyed this Q&A video so much! I am also in a multi-cultural marriage (Canadian with a Finnish husband) from a multi-cultural family and I would definitely recommend reading the book The Culture Map by Erin Meyer. Technically speaking it is a "business" book, but honestly where it helped me the most is in understanding my family relationships and communication, and the decades long confusion that I've had with some family members :) The author is an American woman who lives in France with her family and is a professor at INSEAD. I think that Ms. Meyer does a really excellent job in her writing, it is very clear and the examples really resonate. After reading this book, I have a good idea of where I can expect to have a difference in my communication style when meeting a new person from another country, and I can immediately begin to evaluate the circumstances where we might misunderstand one another and listen closely to understand them and to be able to react suitably. With my husband, I know the areas where we are likely to miscommunicate, and we have both made efforts to move closer to the type of communication that the other expects. This book really made it much easier for me to understand his perspective :) I also think this might be a great book to listen to in advance of your time in England! Thanks again for another lovely video, Jennifer!
Totally agree on the father situation with you Jennifer. Children are not at fault for what their parents do. They love their father and the mother should continue to allow them to love their father and have a good relationship with him. When they become adults they’ll make up their mind about the dad if they want to. I mean, I have actually gone through this with my father and siblings. My mom never spoke ill about my dad to me, but my siblings’ mother did (yes my dad has divorced many times, horrible. 😒) and my siblings grew up with a lot of mixed emotions about our dad and now as adults they understood that their mother wasn’t necessarily always a victim. I can’t tell you how much frustration and trauma that can cause. Sorry for the long comment. I just really enjoy your commentary.
I feel like people are quick to judge others when they don't understand you. I choose to have a traditional marriage. My husband & I get along well & we are attached at the hip, it works for us this way. My life revolves around my cleaning & spending time with my kids & i wouldn't have it any other way. We Aldi have 4 kids & started homeschool last year & I love to spend this time with my kids. I rather stay home with my family than go out with friends. I also like a very clean home so I spend a lot of my time cleaning & re-organizing. We all struggle with cleaning, cooking & taking care of ourselves but I have learned to let go of some of my very clean addiction the past 3 years & it's ok. I need to learn to have fun at home too instead of complaining why the towel is placed over the sink instead of hanging, etc. 🤣
Re about staying calm in the car: I am the mother of four and I learned if there was screaming I would turn of at the next safe place and I would say calming, "I can drive this car when everyone is calm." (unless it was the infant crying and then I would try to fix what was wrong if possible and I would even be willing to wear earplugs if they were just going to cry in the car because they needed to.)
I think the issue with family is that there are those that intentionally choose to be rude. It is very difficult to not get upset/angry, in addition if you do not respond you’re you’re a pushover and the rudeness can quickly escalate if you don’t stand your ground. To tie it back to the first, question, if you’re an introvert it’s even worse because you literally feel lonely all the time.
It is shocking that the Chic family did not respond to you. I always assumed that they had very good manners. I guess even the French arent perfect!!! ;D
If someone does or says something that makes you react, you are giving them control over you in a manner of speaking. If at all possible don't let them have that kind of control or influence over you. Try to maintain your control and reactions to what you want to do, not what someone else causes you to do. Good luck.
Thank you for your program, and thank you for being real! I appreciated your comments on communicating with your husband. We've been married 55 years, and we continue to learn things about each other! May I recommend a book to you? It's called "Wired That Way" by Marita Littauer. The message of this book was so helpful to us in being able to understand why we are the way we are individually, and why we communicate the way we do. Keep up the good work!🎈
Hi Jennifer, I really enjoyed this video. I can relate to the question about being married to someone from a different country, which is the case with my husband and I. Your advice was spot on, especially as we also have a language barrier, and have both learned, and continue to learn, the importance of effective communication. We're currently living in his country before returning to America next year, which is as eye opening for me as living in the States was for him, and that helps with the cultural aspect of communication too.
I have the SAME exact problem with husband from Italy!!! This is the first time I've ever hear anyone talk about this! My husband expects me to intuit what he's delicately referring to in a roundabout way LOL! I always tell hm to just say what he needs to say in a direct way! It avoids a lot of problems that way!
This Q&A was interrupted by a lizard, a ghost, and an adorable toddler! :) I hope you enjoyed today's video For more, visit my corresponding blogpost dailyconnoisseur.blogspot.com/2018/10/reader-q-poised-but-lonely-am-i-in.html Love, Jennifer
You are so pretty. I want to be as put together as you with a newborn
A B
I love how honest you are about your car. My car is messy as well and I’m planning on investing in a car vacuum. I also like your advice about maintaining grace with extended family. I can definitely work on that. I look forward to your videos every week. You are a calming presence in a sometimes chaotic world. Your parents are a beautiful couple and I see where you get your beauty from. Your mother looks part Afro-Panamanian and you have a similar, beautiful exotic look. Your family is beautiful. :)
You're classy and adorable. Thank you (and your family) for sharing yourself with us.
I just love listening to you,I just started listening to u, since I also did intermittent fasting on 2020.Thank u !
We live in an age where people who lean towards conservative values are often mocked, denigrated or dismissed in popular discourse. Jennifer you are such a classy antidote to that, a beautiful role model with a calm confidence. We need more women like you! 🌟
Thank you, Rose!
Rose Nuxe So true. Total class!
Im finding the world is becoming more conservative, reserved, poised. We may be few, but we are more and more each year. I feel encouraged by this observation.
@@LisainCalifornia "Conservative" is also defined as valuing traditional values and things. It's not only a political word. :)
The absolute definition of poise has to be the desire and ability to avoid discussing politics.
One of my favorite sayings, seen on a Mary Engelbreit calendar and attributed to George Bernard Shaw: "The single biggest problem with communication is the illusion that it has taken place."
I’m a stay-at-home mom of grown kids and my nest is empty. 😩 I loved your books because it’s how I’ve always lived, but i too, have struggled with loneliness. Thankfully I’m an introvert, but it was hard when my kids were young, because most people did things differently. Over the years I’ve grown to accept it, because it’s who I am. I’m proud of the fact that I enjoy doing things that most people don’t, and I know a lot of people admire those qualities, but it’s rare that people will compliment you, and instead feel threatened. 🤷🏼♀️ You have to be who you are, especially when those things are important to you. I know my family appreciates it and that’s all that matters. ❤️
good for you, melissa. i really admire you for your discipline and style
Melissa Saccoccio
Thank you for saying what has also been on my heart and mind for the last few years. Unfortunately, when my children were younger, I made friends with women and became a chameleon in order for my children to have what I thought was a “normal “ childhood. Now, becoming the true authentic me has meant I actually have very little in common with my friends of the past two decades. The more I embrace this new lifestyle that I love, the more distant and lonely I feel. It’s not their fault, I’m the one who put up a facade all of these years. It’s just become increasingly difficult to maintain those life long friendships. I’m finally at a time in my life, I should be able to spend quality time with my friends and yet, I suddenly feel like a fraud because I no longer desire to live that lifestyle with women who don’t like the real me. To be with them requires the “chameleon”. Thank you for being such an inspiration to remain faithful to who I truly am and want to become.
Wow, This is exactly how I'm feeling about now! Wish you had a channel because you must have so many tips how to navigate this lifestyle! It would be wonderful to listen to someone on the other side of babies and young children, yet truly true to oneself. That's big goals for me!
I totally agree. I am the same.
I appreciate your sharing because I can relate.
Comment to the young lady whose husband left her. Divorce is like a death, you go thru hate, regret, grief, etc. Allow yourself to go thru it all. My friends told me to throw my husband's things out on the yard because of what he done. I could only do what my heart told me to do and I have no regrets. I'm not telling you it was all peachy peachy, it wasn't and I was going thru breast cancer at the same time. Years later our lives crossed many many times other than because of our 2 children and I was so glad I had done what my heart had told me. I started Bible study during this period and met so many wonderful young women who had similar problems. Try not to be vindictive, it backfires. My husband married the person he left for, went on to have 2 more children. He died of lung cancer and asked for me to come to his house during his illness to discuss life and some financial matters (to my benefit). I'm not telling you that this will be your pattern - what I'm saying is that life takes some very strange turns so try to be kind when you don't want to be and don't say ugly things in front of the children. It will pay off.
Teenage years and 20's- mocked for seeming snotty or aloof. Too old fashioned for dating norm, read books, had cats, dressed simple and spent my time exploring life. Very different morals and standards.Wore glasses and hunted down tweed jackets to wear. Tended to find me in the library, bookstores, speak softly, I avoided loud crowds. Loved going to museums, learning something about history or society, photography, etc..30's- didn't fit in with the normal mom's- I was not rich but I remember wearing lipstick one day and someone commented that I was put together. LOL I do not watch any popular tv or reality shows, I could care less about what is trendy or making sure my kid is trendy. Long walks, lots of homemade food and socializing is smaller groups or just with 1 friend. 40's- now I am quirky, kinda cool and people think I am classy! Still do the same things, bettering myself everyday. Perspective helps and people are out there. Keep being you!
Jennifer, I do love to hear you laugh. You have the BEST laugh. Great video.
Oh Jennifer, my husband and I have been married for 15 years and our biggest communication issue is still HOW we communicate! Lol And we are both from the south, just neighboring States 😜 We have literally traveled the world together, living out of backpacks, had lots of kids, and gone through the adventure of adoption and we STILL don’t get what the other is saying sometimes. But it’s rarely a huge stressor anymore b/c we have learned to laugh and joke about it and not take ourselves so seriously. The one thing we try to communicate clearly to each other is “I’m FOR you; I’m on your side” ;). Thanks for answering the questions. And I think we would all love a couples Q & A. 😉 Blessings!
@Shannon, I love your comment! Sometimes it seems like men and women really ARE from two different planets, right? 😂 Great that you and your husband can laugh about it and make things work!
I had tears in my eyes from laughter because of the "robbed car" story. That is hilarious!
I loved that too 🤣🤣
When I finally left my husband the first thing I told everyone was no talking bad about their dad in front of them. The person it would hurt would be the innocent children. Ur son is adorable
I think that your background is awesome. You're part of the African Panamanian Ancestry. That accounts for brown skin and textured hair, which are both pretty. Seeing that picture of your Mom nice.
I host foreign exchange students and it’s so sad to me that your host parents didn’t respond to you! We’ve had 11 students and I’m thrilled when I hear from any of them. My absolute favorite thing is when they visit. I hope you do manage to get in touch with them someday.
Enjoyed this video. Idea I learned from my neighbor is to always bring a small bag for trash out to the car every time the children got into the car. Every time we got out of the car, we gathered any trash to throw out. Every time we came home, we placed any remaining trash into the trash bag and dropped it right into the trash can before we walked into the house. I added bringing another bag to gather anything that needed to come into the house and would hand something to everyone to put away as soon as we came in. I still do this myself now that our children are grown. It makes a big difference.
I've often wondered about that question about Madame Chic and I must say I was shocked to hear that she never corresponded to your letters and especially to your book which honored her! (Ok....mayyyyyybe I can give a pass on not replying to letters.....but a BOOK???) Wow. You're very gracious about it, Jennifer. Oh well. It has blessed you, your family, and countless readers so.....C'est la vie!
I agree. I feel that is not very chic!
Well, there is the possibility they had already moved or that they didn’t like the idea of being the subject of a book. In that case it may be a case of if you can’t say something nice it is better to say nothing at all.
I always assumed Madame Chic was fictional
I’m Hispanic and I always wondered if you had Hispanic blood. I’m a long time subscriber since back when you wore your pearls. You were one of my first subscriptions. 💕
Listening to a Classical music while I drive keeps me calm and collected.
To the lady going through the divorce, I understand not wanting to behave badly. The question being, how do you fight for what is your fair share? The only person who needs the true ugly facts, is your attorney. Your attorney is the one responsible for fighting on your behalf and will decide when/if those ugly facts should be introduced. Best Wishes.
Great video Jennifer. Thank you.
I work in Cubicle World. Everyone around me has headphones or earbuds in and are listening to something of their own choosing. I just got the Madame Chic audio book. Going to start listening now. 🙂
Thanks for being honest & real. Tip: When my kids were young, I had them clean/vacuum their spot in the car each Friday.
I’m only 5 secs in but have to comment, my son always comments when he hears me listening to you. He goes “mommy, is that Jennifer here” ☺️
la mais douce, that’s so sweet.
Awww, how sweet that your son is sharing your favourite things.
This was filmed almost two years ago, but it is still relevant and insightful. I honestly feel like I'm chatting with a beloved friend, almost as if you and Nikki Moreno had come round for a cup of tea and a chat!! And a slice of cake. Never forget the cake! Xxx
I am so thrilled that I discovered you. You are such a delight. I’m definitely going to continue to follow you as you have inspired me to improve on my housekeeping skills and not to become obsessed with being perfect but to enjoy the process. 💕🎉🎉
Thank you so much for allowing us to connect with you this way! It felt like being able to sit down and have a chat in person.
Loved the "lizard interruption"...such a real life moment.
Thank you for this. You answered a few of the questions that I've had in my mind.
Your son is adorable!
Glad that you are feeling so well after having the baby...you look lovely.
Take care!
Xo
Thank you so much!
I’ve been “following” you since the earlier days of your blog, I even have your first self-published book. I appreciate your perspective so much! It’s so refreshing in an increasingly coarse world 👍🏻🌸
Thank you, Ruth!
Enjoyed this! You have such a beautiful, kind spirit. And an adorable family 🤗🤗🤗
Thank you so much!
I have also been so inspired by becoming a Mother and have set more goals than ever before now that I have a little one. I'm really looking forward to the Marriage Q&A!
Lovely video! So happy for your new baby! They say having two boys & two girls is the ideal family because every child has at least one brother and one sister.
I love what you said about how motherhood inspires you, made me tear up! ❤️
I really enjoyed this q&a. Thank you! I also enjoyed reading the comments. Great audience.
I’m so curious about the Chics, like everyone else I’m so fascinated with them, I’ve even dreamt about their apartment that you describe, in my mind I see Ines de La fressange as Madame chic- and I wish you could return to the chics apartment and record the whole exchange! Lol- I wish we could ask her questions as well! Haha get that french perspective :) I love your honesty about the communication in a marriage like yours, it is very common for Americans and English to have a lot in common but there is a different Lexicon between the two, my girlfriends married to Englishmen usually share a similar experience, American women don’t mind straight forward usually whereas English talk around the matter- in their view they are trusting your intelligence to get the point. Lol but Englishmen usually find American women refreshing for their openness. What a fun Q&A, I hope you do more!
Amanda I am going to have to check out this book.
Haha, separated by a common language ;) I'm in the US and find many men in general here expect us to be mind readers. It can be so frustrating.
The car story was so funny! I’m kind of surprised to hear the chic family never wrote anyone back. It seems like an etiquette faux pas to never acknowledge anyone.
It's so nice to see how kind you've been to that poor young woman who is struggling in Japan among friends, or perhaps former friends who aren't open to the person she is becoming, to the kind of woman she wants to be. Also it was so refreshing to hear you speak of your communication difficulties you sometimes have with your husband. I prefer a blunt style myself...It's easier to understand what's going on with someone when they're direct with you. I thoroughly enjoyed your Q&A! Thank you!
Hello Jennifer! I love the way you answered that 1st comment about being lonely after you decide to make a definite choice on who you want to be and how you will define your core values.I am married and around your age and teach a Culinary/ Domestic Art class part time to senior girls at St Mary's Academy in KS and I highly recommend all your books to my girls. This seems to be a worry/ problem with most of them but I do think they will be so much happier waiting for great friends who are like- minded and will spurn them on to be the best version of themselves!! Thankyou for all you do...we need more young women like you for this next generation of young ladies!☺(My previous girls who are now freshman in college now have discussions about your books when they visit me after class for coffee on Tuesdays) Cheers to Jennifer and Ben from Josh & Valerie( 3 children married 11 years)
Thank you so much, Valerie!
When you spoke about doing a live video I immediately thought of that British man who was doing an interview from his home office. I can just picture your husband frantically trying to pull them out of the room😀😉❤️!
Yes!!! haha :)
I believe I've lost friends over the years due to my enjoying living a chic /fine living life. I finally realized, now in my 50s, that I was lonelier when trying to hide who I was while around them vs being myself. I think that is why I have always been involved with social media from the start. PS: I know I'm replying on an old post, but I'm curious about your comment about being interrupted by "a ghost".
She was talking about the creeky sound her door made when her son opened it.
Motherhood looks good on you Jennifer! I am so like you when it comes to wanting to get back in the swing of things after baby arrives, I’m enjoying these last few weeks but looking forward to establishing a new routine with all three kiddos. It’s funny I talked about just that in today’s vlog 😄 Thank you for sharing your calm contentment and diligence as a thriving mama of four 💛
Thank you, Hilary! I'm so excited for you! xx
Hi Jennifer you killed me with the van story lol that was hysterical. What a great q and A! I just turned 57 on the 8 Th.of October. I too feel lonely as if no one understands. I don't have friends because I don't drink( at all never have) and I am very much different in how I dress, and how clean my home etc. My daughter being 16 is very busy with speech and debate, marching band and all her AP classes. I've gone to counseling but I am who I am, and at this age you are set in your ways. Thank you for your graceful videos. I so enjoy them. 🙋🏻🙅🏻👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼🤗👍🏼🍁🍂
I just love your laugh Jennifer 😘👏
Great video, I think you are amazing to do everything you do with four kids as well. I have two kids the same age as your girls, and wish I could achieve half what you do but it was interesting to know how much sleep you get - I certainly need a lot more sleep than you do. I am from England and I laughed about the part about Ben being not direct enough in his speech, I think this could be an Anglo/American difference, we insinuate a lot without actually saying it! I’ve never commented before but love your videos, especially wardrobe related ones, or parenting tips, so please keep up the good work. X
Thank you for your comment and requests! I agree about the Anglo American difference :)
I think it is a European-American difference!
Congrats, Jennifer, on another sweet little child to love. I was just thinking...it wasn’t very “Madame Chic-ish” of her not to respond to all your correspondence. Interesting because I really would think that would be a courtesy she would show to people that write personal letters to her. Just an observation. I love how you said your kids inspire you. I was the same way. They gave me energy. Now I struggle with that some as an empty nester. Oh well. Life is good though, just different. Have a great day, Jennifer!
i thought it was a shame, too, for you not to hear back from the chics. i do hope they are ok.
Jillluvslife Being from a country very close culturally and geographically to France, I would say this a matter of cultural difference. I have lived in the US for more than four years and I find Americans extremely friendly and warm. It is definitely not like that everywhere. My mother tongue is French and I would say that even the language reflects a certain coldness. It is nothing personal. It is just that the boundaries are different. One like to keep a little distance. It is like that in many countries in Europe and it is just the way people are. I personnally much prefer the warm, American way and the good thing is that I never take it for granted since I have been brought up differently. I think different cultures can learn from each other and while American can learn from the French in certain matters, French people can learn from Americans in this matter. I do have wonderful American friends who are showing me the way!
moncpteUA-cam thank you for sharing your insight 😊
I'm finally catching up on some of your precious videos and this is the best "television" around, because you inspire, share how life can be rich and full in a poised and polished way and you share it with your delicious sense of humor. That was a great story about cleaning out your car (I'm still cracking up over your infectious laughter about the neighbor saying your car looked like it had been "robbed") which inspired you to tackle the job that evening. Then, to (LOL) be in the midst of a lizard invasion with your family handling it downstairs and your smoothly, with more humor, continuing on in your video recording, showing The Daily Connoisseur life in full bloom and the way it is. Thank you for being yourself, sharing yourself and helping all of us to live better quality lives.
As for future Q & A's, I'm very excited to hear about your upcoming 2019 England announcement. I'm also interested in hearing about what type of cookware you decided to buy. Relating to that, I have one Staub dutch oven, in grey enamel, and while heavy, it cooks and bakes beautifully, keeping things moist and the cleanup is easy. It was so much fun to learn about your family background and see your wonderful parents. I'd also welcome another Mr. Connoisseur video with you. Whatever you offer is worth watching. Enjoy your beautiful family.
You beautiful wonderful inspiration to all new as well as seasoned moms, and childless women in general. You have brought back class---something that has been sorely missing since the 1950's-'60's. Jackie Kennedy, President Kennedy's wife our First Lady, exuded class. She was the trend setter and model of behavior during that time of history. You are a delight Jennifer. Keep up your inspirational videos of who and what women should aspire to model today. It's been lost for a very long time. Thank you for breathing life back into her.
This video title speaks to my soul!! I've been in the chic process for over a year (wow it happens in LAYERS) without even reading MC or knowing JLS's channel, and now that I've been watching your content, gosh it's like I'm understood. Will keep listening and learning. Thank you for the work that you do!
I was born and raised in France. In the USA, I felt overdressed for a long time with people saying: you look nice, where are you going? Finally, I decided to be myself and to simply reply with a smile “ thank you”😀
Thank you Jennifer! I am SO GRATEFUL you were inspired to lead a community of classy, like-minded women.
Also, your hair looks so full and lovely in this video-so very Duchess Kate-like. Love it!
I loved your van story, I’ve been casually watching your videos here and there and loved the real ness of your story.
And your statement about needing your husband to be very direct in his communication is something I really identify with too.
Thank you for your videos!
I really enjoyed this video, the story about your car was so funny 😂. It would be great to see a Q and A with Ben. Thanks for all you do!
Love you channel, just found it. One thing I would say about a 10 item wardrobe, is to consider where you live. I live in Canada, we have 4 seasons. This means that my light summer stuff will definitely not work for winter, plus the in between seasons. Plus I work in health care and have uniforms. I try and keep my seasonal stuff down to basic pieces, but has to be for each season. :)
You’re always beautiful but your makeup and radiant glow is gorgeous on you.
Enjoyed this so much, Jennifer! It's always fun getting to know a bit more about you. :) And I WISH I felt industrious as well as inspired while having babies. Haha! I have all kinds of big ideas for projects I'd LIKE to pursue, but I feel like I can only keep up with the must-do tasks of the day (meals, laundry, dishes, snuggles, etc.). Seeing you do what you do is very motivating, and I'm grateful you share that with us!
Thank you, Jesse!
11 to 5:30 would not be enough sleep for me...If I get up before 6 I have to be in bed before 10 to get 8 hours.
Your advice to the lonely Japanese lady and the newly single mum of three was very heartfelt and sincere. I think we all have family members and in-laws who all require us to ‘paise’, as you say but sadly some of us have those who are nasty/vindictive. As I have got older I have chosen to stay away from those people for th sake of my health. A tough situation but necessary for me. Your little boy is adorable and growing so fast. I love your comment about leaving Ben to deal with the lizard ! You are glowing, regardless of the lamp. Wishing you and your family good health and love from Australia xxx
Has anyone seen Princess Eugenie's wedding dress? It is so chic and flattering for her figure! I instantly though of Jennifer 😘
You look so luminous, it's amazing!
Thank you for this inspiring video. So interesting how we can live with someone (like our husbands) for more than a decade, and we're still getting to know them! And happy for you to have your wonderful new baby! xo- Cara
3 years ago I moved to a new town with my preschooler and toddler in tow. I thought I would make an effort to get involved and meet other moms so I joined a MOPS group and even helped lead. The underlying message I kept getting from people was that I dress like a CEO and not a stay at home mom and it really intimidated other women. They were little comments and remarks, such as “what are you dressed up for?” “Got a date?” “Oh wow, I should’ve dressed up too!” Innocent (mostly) but I found I couldn’t make friends bc of my dress. After 2 years I finally started purchasing more casual clothes to fit in to events where I knew I would seem to aloof or “out of their league” or better than. I know that sounds so rotten and inauthentic but I was lonely and didn’t know what else to do and I wanted to seem approachable. Well it worked. I dunno what that says about me or others but I found dressing down at certain times is as powerful as dressing up. Anyway, I understand the loneliness.
Hi Jennifer, I finally got to read your first book and will be reading the others soon. It was very relatable and surprisingly funny at times.
In my van the kids and I always take anything out even if they’re not the one that brought it in. It’s just routine so we automatically do it.
Good morning Jennifer! You tackled some very interesting questions and I agree with your answers about those topics. There are people that come in and out of our lives and especially when we make changes....and for the better, we leave behind those who don't want what's best for us or value the same things and that's completely okay. That story about your van was so funny! I try to stay on top of cleaning my car out once a week as well....but it doesn't always happen, however, after someone else rides in my car or comes over to it at worship service I see my car through new eyes and that's what it takes to get it back on my list of priorities haha! Oh that lizard was causing so much fun in your house! I loved hearing your son talk, how sweet! This was an exciting video to listen to, I look forward to more! Much love to you! ~Nikki
Thank you so much, Nikki! The car thing is hilarious! :)
Good morning Jennifer. I find a lot of the question relate to me! I find with family members, they have their things and I have mine. I try to stay calm and say it's ok to be different. It's nice what you do but for me, I enjoy things differently for myself.
Such good advice, about the Lady going through the divorce! I tried not to show my hurt and anger around my Daughter’s. He is their Dad and always will be!
I so enjoyed this video!!! Thank you for sharing. I am fairly new to your channel, so you did answer some of my lingering questions. You are precious! Wish I lived closer to your viewer that feels lonely. I am probably old enough to at least be her mom, but, my youngest of our 4 is 26. I truly enjoy my kids sharing their lives with hubby and i. So, maybe she will find an older friend that would be a great listener and find some fulfillment in that until her peer age group catches up with her wisdom on living a chic life. Anyway, take care Jennifer and God bless you all ~
You are precious. So glad I found your channel! Subbed. I am an empty nester and love to hear your stories especially with the children. You are so practical and sweet. And a very classy lady. ♥️
Jennifer, what a lovely video! Your presence and demeanor are not only calming, but so inspiring. I resonated with much of what you said, we have a lot in common. I am also bi-racial, my husband is from another country and we lived in his country for many years. Inside I have a book that's just waiting to burst forth. I think about it a lot and start writing it in my head every day but never get to actually writing it. I have watched your self publishing video before but I am going to watch it again and I'm also very interested in reading your books. I think they will be my Christmas present to myself. Thank you for sharing with us!
Hi Jennifer! Since you'll be spending more time in England next year, I'm wondering if you've watched Dr. Lucy Worsley's UA-cam videos on history, If Walls Could Talk, the history and evolution of the home, Henry VIII and much more! She is such fun to watch and you learn a lot.
Loved this! Thank you! My husband and I are both American, and communication is an issue for us, too. We've been married over 20years now. I think that maybe that's a universal issue for all couples? Love you and your message! Thanks for the inspiration!
Good Day Jennifer, I love your channel always having good advice.. I just wanted to share a little of my life change when I was in my early 20’s I did not care how I went out, but I did care how I went to work I was fortunately had a uniform policy that was easy, but when I was not at work, I was a mess looking back😂😂, but since I Hit my late 40’s that changed now I am in my early 50’s I think very different. This is what the generation of the 20’s and 30’s need now women like you and me to show then how to be lady like, classy chic, I would also say vintage love that style... You should turn this into a t.v show your great.. God Bless you and your passion...
I completely understand your desire to get up and do. For some people resting a lot is very stressful. I always felt I had a healthy ratio of rest and work. When I had my first child I wanted to catch up on everything I let go. Just as I was ready to relax and take it easy my sweet baby woke up and needed all the things that babies need. I was so exhausted that I learned from then on to take it more slowly. To rest if I needed to while the baby rested so I would never show up depleted just when my baby or child needed me most. Parenting is not a science, all children are different so you must be flexible, and open minded. And, above all, loving and kind but with the proper amount of firmness and consistency. We will never be perfect and neither will our children but love covers a multitude of sins; and things seem to turn out okay despite all our mistakes.
I love the messages you share and how you are being such a great example with your advice. 👍💕
While I agree with you about not continually bad-mouthing your ex, I have also witnessed the total cover up of someone’s sin against the family backfire in the years to come. The children need to have a safe place for their own grief of this loss and sometimes grieving together is very beneficial. Remaining stoic often comes across to children as something quite different; lack of love for the ex, lack of hurt by his leaving; lack of anger for breaking up the family, etc. This can make the children feel that there’s no opportunity to express their own feelings. Also, it’s good and right to say what the ex is doing is wrong (if it’s true) We have such high standards for our children’s behavior and yet allow an ex to not be held accountable for any wrongdoing?? That sends extremely confusing messages about what is truly important. Again, I want to say that these discussions need to be age appropriate and stick to the actual facts of the leaving. No other personal stuff needed unless for their safety. Pretending the ex is not doing anything harmful doesn’t help anyone. Btw. I’ve been married for 35 years, but I have had front row seats to friend and family divorces and have seen the damage keeping silent can do. So, it’s just another perspective to pray for wisdom regarding how much to discuss with your children. Don’t assume that keeping quiet is automatically the answer. Continually Trashing the ex is NOT acceptable. That’s also extremely harmful for you and your children. My heart breaks for all of you who must endure this pain. I’m so sorry.
200% agree. Divorce is like a death, a grieving process is needed. Noone
should ignore another's sin.
You are so calm and relaxed!!
This video was so entertaining and cute and classy and I think I’m in love. You are a beautiful woman and you have such a good outlook on life. Bless you.
Panamanian, amazing! Do you speak any Spanish? Have you visited there? I lived a year in Panama and fell in love with the cloud forest around Boquete. : )
Love this video . The car story is so hilarious 😂
I love your video. You look absolutely great!
Thank you so much!
I agree. You look radiant, despite getting up before dawn! 😁
Thanks for this:) I always enjoy your chats ❤️🙂
Absolutely loved this Q&A!
Funny re sleep training -- that didn't exist when I had my daughters, but daughter 1 was sleeping all night at 5 weeks and her signal on awakening was cooing, while daughter 2 was what was referred to back then as a "colicky" baby. (Pediatrician offered a tranquillizer -- for me, not her; she was thriving while screaming. I was shocked and passed as I was nursing her, but he made his point!). So wondrous how these new individuals arrive already fully themselves, each one unique from the beginning. We get to know them and guide them but they are each their own person from the beginning!
Your mother is beautiful!!!
Hi Jennifer! I enjoyed this Q&A video so much! I am also in a multi-cultural marriage (Canadian with a Finnish husband) from a multi-cultural family and I would definitely recommend reading the book The Culture Map by Erin Meyer. Technically speaking it is a "business" book, but honestly where it helped me the most is in understanding my family relationships and communication, and the decades long confusion that I've had with some family members :)
The author is an American woman who lives in France with her family and is a professor at INSEAD. I think that Ms. Meyer does a really excellent job in her writing, it is very clear and the examples really resonate. After reading this book, I have a good idea of where I can expect to have a difference in my communication style when meeting a new person from another country, and I can immediately begin to evaluate the circumstances where we might misunderstand one another and listen closely to understand them and to be able to react suitably. With my husband, I know the areas where we are likely to miscommunicate, and we have both made efforts to move closer to the type of communication that the other expects. This book really made it much easier for me to understand his perspective :)
I also think this might be a great book to listen to in advance of your time in England!
Thanks again for another lovely video, Jennifer!
I had no idea you were Latina! I'd love to see a video with you and your mother doing a favorite Panamanian recipe😊
Totally agree on the father situation with you Jennifer. Children are not at fault for what their parents do. They love their father and the mother should continue to allow them to love their father and have a good relationship with him. When they become adults they’ll make up their mind about the dad if they want to. I mean, I have actually gone through this with my father and siblings. My mom never spoke ill about my dad to me, but my siblings’ mother did (yes my dad has divorced many times, horrible. 😒) and my siblings grew up with a lot of mixed emotions about our dad and now as adults they understood that their mother wasn’t necessarily always a victim. I can’t tell you how much frustration and trauma that can cause. Sorry for the long comment. I just really enjoy your commentary.
Thank you for being yourself and sharing. I love your videos.
He is your twin!!!! So cute!
Thanks for answering my question! Blessings to you and yours!
I feel like people are quick to judge others when they don't understand you. I choose to have a traditional marriage. My husband & I get along well & we are attached at the hip, it works for us this way. My life revolves around my cleaning & spending time with my kids & i wouldn't have it any other way. We Aldi have 4 kids & started homeschool last year & I love to spend this time with my kids. I rather stay home with my family than go out with friends. I also like a very clean home so I spend a lot of my time cleaning & re-organizing. We all struggle with cleaning, cooking & taking care of ourselves but I have learned to let go of some of my very clean addiction the past 3 years & it's ok. I need to learn to have fun at home too instead of complaining why the towel is placed over the sink instead of hanging, etc. 🤣
Re about staying calm in the car: I am the mother of four and I learned if there was screaming I would turn of at the next safe place and I would say calming, "I can drive this car when everyone is calm." (unless it was the infant crying and then I would try to fix what was wrong if possible and I would even be willing to wear earplugs if they were just going to cry in the car because they needed to.)
I think the issue with family is that there are those that intentionally choose to be rude. It is very difficult to not get upset/angry, in addition if you do not respond you’re you’re a pushover and the rudeness can quickly escalate if you don’t stand your ground. To tie it back to the first, question, if you’re an introvert it’s even worse because you literally feel lonely all the time.
Thanks to ur book i feel reassured of who I am: a classy lady
It is shocking that the Chic family did not respond to you. I always assumed that they had very good manners. I guess even the French arent perfect!!! ;D
For whatever good qualities the French may have, they tend to be very arrogant and self-important.
Hi Jennifer, I am interested to know how you met your husband. Hope it’s not too personal.
Thank you Jennifer. All your videos are lovely.
I'm 5' 5 1/2" as well. I'm the same height as Marilyn Monroe, but different measurements. 😁 Your son is adorable.
Thank you! :)
Wonderful video, you look beautiful and it’s always a joy to listen to you. God’s Blessings to you and your family.💕
If someone does or says something that makes you react, you are giving them control over you in a manner of speaking. If at all possible don't let them have that kind of control or influence over you. Try to maintain your control and reactions to what you want to do, not what someone else causes you to do. Good luck.
Thank you for your program, and thank you for being real! I appreciated your comments on communicating with your husband. We've been married 55 years, and we continue to learn things about each other! May I recommend a book to you? It's called "Wired That Way" by Marita Littauer. The message of this book was so helpful to us in being able to understand why we are the way we are individually, and why we communicate the way we do. Keep up the good work!🎈
Your little boy is such a cute interruption to the video. :)
I really enjoyed this video. You are such a wonderful inspiration! 💛
Hi Jennifer, I really enjoyed this video. I can relate to the question about being married to someone from a different country, which is the case with my husband and I. Your advice was spot on, especially as we also have a language barrier, and have both learned, and continue to learn, the importance of effective communication. We're currently living in his country before returning to America next year, which is as eye opening for me as living in the States was for him, and that helps with the cultural aspect of communication too.
I have the SAME exact problem with husband from Italy!!! This is the first time I've ever hear anyone talk about this! My husband expects me to intuit what he's delicately referring to in a roundabout way LOL! I always tell hm to just say what he needs to say in a direct way! It avoids a lot of problems that way!
That little boy is adorable !