On a slightly more serious note... the whole deal with not judging David by his size is that he was the youngest of his brothers and his father didn't even show him to Samuel at first. ... but he was still handsome, like looks aren't everything but they're a bonus.
I thought the thumbnail was "Bizarre Christian Bale Game." I'm a fan of awful games so my next thought was, "Wait, did they make American Psycho into a game or something? Is there a physical edition? I MUST HAVE IT." Anyways.
I mean I don't know that it does ignore it. It's just that no one expected a slinger to do the 1 on 1, and it's possible Goliath had poor eyesight and literally couldn't see it coming. Those little details give me a bit more trust that there might be something to the myth, we don't have any historical evidence for David but we do for his house a few generations later.
@@PrincessOzaline Then, the person telling the tale should be educated enough to understand that a sling stone can pierce a human skull. Pretending that David was wielding a toy against a man, and that's why he deserved to be king makes things MORE unbelievable, as the leader of an army would know this stuff, because it would have been common knowledge at the time. The myth is just that. A myth. That you are trying to give ANY credence to it explains why Palestinians no longer have the right to return home should they attempt to flee their ancestral home.
The rock isn't what dealt the killing blow to Goliath. After David shot him, David grabbed Goliath's own sword and used it to chop off the giant's head. In the child-friendly versions, the authors tend to just put the part about the slignshot and not the beheading.
@@chadschmaltz9790 yeah, but those slings could take out lions and such as David says in the story, he did cut off Goliath's head, but if that was symbolic or if he was already pretty much out doesn't change the fact that a slinger was already deadly. There's some details like that that make me think it's more likely to come from a true story (we don't have any extra biblical accounts of David's house till a few generations later). Check out Bart Ehrman's ted talk on David, it's cool.
"But wait, I thought God said he only looks at the heart!" Maybe it's similar to an asexual seeing a really attractive person and going, "I may be asexual but GAWD DAMN!"
Nice, I love some of the memes people made with this game on streams... Wish I had of played this game instead but the devil made a deal with me so I had played his game instead and let's just say that it wasn't for the feint of heart.
Haha I tried so many times. Did not work for me 🤣 I dunno if it’s bugged out for me or what if that’s a thing lol. I’m gonna be so mad if that’s a thing for other people lmfao 🤣 🤣
Naming an animal after a specific verse in a specific chapter of the bible is pretty hilarious chat edit: also they obviously took a lot of inspiration from mgs3 on the ladders 🪜
God wants you to check out these links:
ko-fi.com/earlybird
twitter.com/earlybird_tv
twitch.tv/earlyybird
The biblical answer is that Deborah is an angel.
The realistic answer is that Deborah is an eldritch horror
A Biblically accurate Deborah could theoretically be both at the same time!
"The Lord decides when stealth missions work" lmfao
My favorite part of the bible was where you fail for not being stealthy enough. :'D
Coincidentally, that is my least favorite part of the Bible
So when Adam and Eve tried to hide from God?
Ah yes, my favourite part of the classic Biblical Fables. David german suplexing the non-believers.
Simply majestic.
The tale of David suplexing Goliath gives me the strength to get through each day🙏
Almost as powerful a story as Moses Bautista Bombing the Pharaoh or Jesus DDTing Judas.
This just looks like Assassin's Creed: Bible Stories.
The last time I came upon David I ended up with a restraining order :/
That game is the most faithful fan recreation of the MGS3 missile silo ladder I've ever seen XD
Damn, the lord came powerfully upon David.
Now that's a sentence I did not expect to hear from... anywhere...
lmao, me either. the robotic ai voice really adds to it 👌
"God is testing me and I have not studied" is a good line, omg
Snake Eater had faster ladder climbing segments than The Bible did apparently...
The Lord cometh... and he just kept on coming now, didn't he.
He is a persistent one, I'll give him that.
I like how the star of david is all over the place... Clearly he got his branding game on early.
On a slightly more serious note... the whole deal with not judging David by his size is that he was the youngest of his brothers and his father didn't even show him to Samuel at first. ... but he was still handsome, like looks aren't everything but they're a bonus.
I have fear of heights and I climb faster than David there.
Agag "reflex" and go down Tequila, your humor is a gold mine
Damn david hit the gym really hard for his shepherd job
I thought the thumbnail was "Bizarre Christian Bale Game." I'm a fan of awful games so my next thought was, "Wait, did they make American Psycho into a game or something? Is there a physical edition? I MUST HAVE IT." Anyways.
We need a bizarre Christian Bale game tbh.
When that guard knocked you down the ladder i burst out laughing,easily one of the funniest scenes i've seen this year.
I am glad there is joy to be found in my agony 😩🤣
Now i know where they got the idea for Snake from Metal Gear from, it makes sense now!
I’m just starting to watch this, but if there’s not a lot of weird s3x stuff, it’s not doing the story of David justice
Putting a ladder climbing section in a video and not overlaying "Snaaaaake Eateeeeeeer!" over it is a crime you know!
You’re correct
I will pay for my crimes someday 😩
David is out here giving people the rko
12:18 Damn you weren't lying you are truly a certified horse girl
Never trust a myth that ignores how a sling bullet has the same stopping power as a 9mm round.
I mean I don't know that it does ignore it. It's just that no one expected a slinger to do the 1 on 1, and it's possible Goliath had poor eyesight and literally couldn't see it coming. Those little details give me a bit more trust that there might be something to the myth, we don't have any historical evidence for David but we do for his house a few generations later.
@@PrincessOzaline Then, the person telling the tale should be educated enough to understand that a sling stone can pierce a human skull.
Pretending that David was wielding a toy against a man, and that's why he deserved to be king makes things MORE unbelievable, as the leader of an army would know this stuff, because it would have been common knowledge at the time.
The myth is just that. A myth.
That you are trying to give ANY credence to it explains why Palestinians no longer have the right to return home should they attempt to flee their ancestral home.
David showed up to a sword fight with a medieval GLOCK. The only thing I took away from David v Goliath is that David is a little bitch.
The rock isn't what dealt the killing blow to Goliath. After David shot him, David grabbed Goliath's own sword and used it to chop off the giant's head.
In the child-friendly versions, the authors tend to just put the part about the slignshot and not the beheading.
@@chadschmaltz9790 yeah, but those slings could take out lions and such as David says in the story, he did cut off Goliath's head, but if that was symbolic or if he was already pretty much out doesn't change the fact that a slinger was already deadly. There's some details like that that make me think it's more likely to come from a true story (we don't have any extra biblical accounts of David's house till a few generations later). Check out Bart Ehrman's ted talk on David, it's cool.
So apparently gameplay from this game is another thing my dog is afraid of
It’s okay dog, I’m afraid of it too
Biblically Accurate Sewer Level
Edit: CAN YOU SUPLEX A BEAR? I MUST KNOW!
I did not have success suplexing the bears but this game is mysterious so who knows
@@early-tv And just like that, I've lost interest in the church again.
You talking about the game while running over sheep had me dying
"But wait, I thought God said he only looks at the heart!"
Maybe it's similar to an asexual seeing a really attractive person and going, "I may be asexual but GAWD DAMN!"
Two Deborah's out of five!!! I'm fucking dying lol
Oh no… now Deborahs made it to the comment section D:
The ladder climbing is so slow! One rung at a time, ugh. I know what’ll pass the time!
🎶What a thrill…
WITH DARKNESS AND SILENCE THROUGH THE NIIIIGGHHHTTT
WHAT A THRILL
sorry im contractually obligated to respond that way
Yeah, I got a moment for Jesus I suppose. Love all the games you try dude 😂😂
8:09 What a Thrill.
With darkness and silence through the niiight
What a thrill
Metal Gear flashbacks anyone? 8:20
I'm just happy you can rag doll the sheep. 🐑
Meeee tooo, best part of the game😌
Loving your content!!! Heres your 500th sub
Ahhh thank you so much 🥹🥹
I really appreciate ya!!
And now our Earlybird has broken 1k! Its gunna go up fast :)
shame on you for not making a Snake Eater joke during the long ladder climb part.
Nice, I love some of the memes people made with this game on streams... Wish I had of played this game instead but the devil made a deal with me so I had played his game instead and let's just say that it wasn't for the feint of heart.
Yep. Definitely saw the baby
Did i just see a dancing baby?
Perhaps 👀
@@early-tvI saw it again trickster. I can't be fooled twice. I think
HOWART
I'm m try to learn english this video
I died laughing at this sh!t
i am missing davids boyfriend (read his story, he has a lover!)
why is there a biblical souls game
Because humanity needed it
@@early-tv girl it's literally free elden ring lmao. 2 Deborah's out of 5 is accurate tho lmao
I AM IN MISSOURI THERE AIN'T NOBODY WHO CAN COMFORT ME (OH YEAH!)
REECE'S PUFFS REECE'S PUFFS EAT EM UP EAT EM UP EAT EM UP
That song is what my brain sounds like (it's 6AM with no sleep and I've been off my ADHD medicine for a month)
🤣 You do know pressing Shift like you do when you run he does climb the ladder much faster
Haha I tried so many times. Did not work for me 🤣
I dunno if it’s bugged out for me or what if that’s a thing lol. I’m gonna be so mad if that’s a thing for other people lmfao 🤣 🤣
@@early-tv If it doesnt then maybe in your keybinds its set to another keybind but it works for me
@@MeanDean I’ll have to try and get it to work when the next part comes out hehehe.
Me when I'm glowing with health and have handsome features:
What do you use to edit your videos?
Great video ❤ FF14 please 👏
Thanks! I’ve always wanted to go through the story of FF14, someday I will! :D
@@early-tv yaaaaaaassssssss it is very good is a slow burner but like me you’ll end up bawling your eyes out lol
Naming an animal after a specific verse in a specific chapter of the bible is pretty hilarious chat
edit: also they obviously took a lot of inspiration from mgs3 on the ladders 🪜