Her family dumped all the responsibility on a mentally Ill young woman. Sounds like the family didn’t give one shit about either Heidi or her Grandmother. What a tragic situation.
I had a similar situation with my two aunties. They never get married and all the responsibilities fell on me and my mother. I lived almost 7 years, of my young adult life, taking care of them. I ended up in debt, and it was super hard due to my mental issue. I was actually relieved when they finally found peace. I have been and will be always a supporter of euthanasia. That is no life for anyone. I feel sorry for this kind of situation.
I have nothing but sympathy for both the victim and the perp in this case. When my dad had his big stroke in 2009 I literally watched the person he had been drain away out of his body over the course of a couple of hours. We were lucky, we have good healthcare in the UK and my dad had a sufficient estate to cover nursing home costs. He lived another six years but the man we buried on October 21 2015 wasn't my dad anymore, and hadn't been for a long time. We had made a pact, my siblings and me, to never fight over money, to share all responsibilities as and when necessary and to always present a united front despite our many differences, and we did this. And that's how our dad's last years had at least a semblance of dignity. This poor woman will never achieve the peace of mind she so desperately seeks, and a society - and family - that allows a situation like this to arise is worthy of nothing but contempt. I am so, so sorry.
My dad had dementia when he fell and broke his hip. It was replaced but he never walked again. The dementia just ate him up. He was down to 105lbs with horrendous bed sores. I went to feed him as usual and I could smell him. He was on the 2nd floor. That broke me. Just absolutely broke me. I kept thinking that if he was an animal in that condition I'd be in jail for abuse. But because he was human we had to let him suffer. I understand Heidi's action. If I could have, I would have ended his suffering that day. And to tell the truth, my suffering as well. I was the only child who cared for him. The rest never even visited. It was brutal having to watch him shrivel up and die. And then be told I overstepped my authority when I told the doctor DNR. Who the hell wants to come back to that so called life? Sigh... Sometimes families suck!!😢
This society is beyond despicable. How many people are literally living on the street, drowning themselves because they were LGBT and tortured + disowned, veterans in the army, and/or victims of extreme abuse living with trauma? Yet, there they are, being shamed and used up, exploited, and degraded into oblivion while abandoned because "they're not popular, worth a dime for anyone socially and have not a ton of coins to extract from them every month". Some of them are denied, repeatedly, for disability or never had a stable job to pay into it. They face ice, cold, starvation, exposure, cruel treatment, humiliation, and constant shame, distress, ostracism, and more. Yeah, no ... Nobody cares about how people caring for those who can't help themselves, are losing their mind and can't afford to place them into nursing. Society will blame you for stealing food to survive, losing health from abuse, snapping & defending yourself from cruelty, being poor, or going insane.
Her family left her alone in this difficult time, that's contrary to what you experienced. Not fighting over money is noble but she didn't have such a supporting family.
@@rodmorrison47 I ment her support of her family, that's different to what you guys came to terms with. They left her alone and triggered the whole situation. Nvm.
It’s a rarity for me to ever have any sympathy whatsoever for a killer when I’m watching these, but several things are clear here. Heidi is clearly struggling with severe mental health issues. Heidi really thought killing her grandmother was in the best interest of her grandmother. And while Heidi wasn’t remorseful in respect to thinking she shouldn’t have done what she did, she was still clearly mortified by what she had done. Just a terribly sad situation all the way around. Heidi does deserve some kind of punishment but it’s still so very sad.
First time I have felt the same way. Seems like everything had fallen to her in respects to her grandmothers care and she was feeling the strain for a long time. These are the people that have no real support system, and slip through the cracks in terms of social support. 😢
It's called "compassion fatigue" and it should be a mitigating factor in her sentencing. This is what you get in the US health system when it is chronically underfunded user pays and people are basically left without supports in a first world country that can completely support them. So Heidi is trotted off to a prison and becomes another number in the country that imprisons more people than anywhere else on earth - why? Because it is a good business model - imagine having clients trapped in a cell who cannot complain and have to eat the muck you serve and sleep on the pillows you give them? Perfect business model. rant over.
It was because she owned a house. Nursing homes want your house first and then insurance will kick in after all that money is gone. Yes I know from experience.
A lot of people don’t know you have to give the government all your assets! It’s absolutely wrong. So the best thing to do is “sell” your home to a trusted person So this will ensure the family home will be saved.
I actually feel bad for this woman. At the very least she was honest. I feel bad she felt she needed to do this, I can't imagine what her grandma's final thoughts were. I hope this woman can also find some peace. Her family should be ashamed
Sad that the doctor that said "send her to a home" didn't suggest financial options for that. Oh, now there are resources when an innocent old lady died. Fuck everyone involved that sat and did nothing until this happened. This whole broken system relies on it's victims having friends and family when some people have none. Why go to them if you will only be tossed onto your family in the end. Until this ends stuff like this will go on and it will get worse.
Why? There are millions of people in similar or worse situations that don’t do this. She deserves all the mental anguish and psychological torture daily.
Why? There are millions of people in similar or worse situations that don’t do this. She deserves all the mental anguish and psychological torture daily.
Maybe if clowns didn’t blindly support cops, and qualified/absolute immunity and voted for smaller government we would go back to a time when resources were plenty.
I really did not expect to feel sympathy for the perpetrator coming into this, but I do. Caregiving is an incredibly stressful role to take on - especially when you have no assistance and no money. Sometimes caring for an aging/sick family member can last for decades, leaving no room to live one's own life or focus on having a family. I'm not defending her actions but this woman just seem so broken, and this being the only way out in her mind is tragic.
@CandidBanter If she was on meth the headline would say "Meth fueled murderer killed grandma" since cops always do a drug test. I feel sorry for her. She cracked.
@CandidBanter She wasn't on drugs. She's already been tried and is serving her time, it's not like this just happened. They would have done a full physical exam, including drug test, upon intake. What you're seeing is a nervous breakdown. I read the report, there was no mention of drugs. Apparently, she is mentally ill, although it didn't say exactly what the illness was.
@@Kristine_202why would you think they do a full physical exam in jail? That's not true. You're just assuming that and I'm not sure why. You think they drug test every person that goes to jail? They don't. They don't even give adequate care to those who need it while incarcerated. If an inmate is going to be there for an extended period of time or if they're going to be transferred to a prison then they will test for various diseases, particularly stds and they will drug test if contraband has entered the facility and they're looking to bring further charges on someone they suspect of using while in jail but they don't just test every person who comes in, just because.
@domdonald Parents choose to have their children; children do not have the option to choose the family they are born into. If parents reach a point in their life where they decide that they no longer wish to raise their children, adoption is an option available to them. Whereas people can't simply "give away" their responsibility to their elders, no matter how they ended up being the unwilling caregivers to them.
What’s sad is Alice’s own children didn’t help her it was all on Heidi! Hearing and seeing all she had to see and what disorders she had just over drived her
It doesn’t seem to matter how many adults could and should help with the care of their elderly members, in my personal experience, it usually falls to one person.. not in any way condoning what she did, being an only caregiver is extremely stressful and exhausting, without the added issues of mental disorders.. the extended family , that let her take on all of the responsibility for care, should bear some responsibility for this sad result.
My mom passed last October. I cared for her 5 years as an only child. Because of dementia, the last year she called me terrible insults and became mean towards me. I never ONCE thought of killing or hurting her although I did take lot's of time outs. There's always an alternative to hurting someone.
I sympathize with your situation & in no way condone her final decision but she suffers from mental health issues too, which makes what she would have been feeling 1000 times worse!
@susanivy3619 she was desperate, maybe also fed up with the whole situation. If your own family leaves you alone, i want to know how you would react. I'm not defending her actions but I can somehow relate to how it feels being helpless. I guess you never were in such a situation, so how could you know better. 🤷♂️
Granddaughter's situation is as tragic as grandma's. They reached out for help to no avail. Cops and prosecutor maligned granddaughter terribly as she eloquently explained her thinking. Sad all around.
I mean most caregivers will not choose to murder even in those circumstances. As much as it’s easy to empathize with Heidi, it’s also right for her to answer to the law and face the consequences for her actions.
I find it disgusting that this lady was the only one helping grandma. Where are here kids? Worried about their mothers estate! I worked in a nursing home. It is not easy. This lady deserved a break and family should have traded days. She lived to her 90s. Bless her heart. She deserved to fulfill her life. Heidi is heartbroken. But I can understand the pressure and stress along with having her own issues. I feel for both these ladies. 😞💔
That prosecuting attorney at the end really bugged me. "she hasn't been able to explain to MY SATISFACTION why she did this." HIS satisfaction. She explained why she did it. She displayed significant mental health struggles and anguish during the interviews. Clearly she was at her wits end and unable to cope any longer. That doesn't excuse what she did but it sure does explain it. I wish she had been able to find some good support to help her through that period. Luckily for me, I did find support in a similar situation. I condemn her actions, but don't condemn her, if that makes any sense.
I agree, her explanations were very precise. She felt utterly at the end of her rope. It’s annoying how the interviewers are trying really hard to get her to confess to first degree murder. I wish she would have had a lawyer to begin with. ☮️🍃
My first thought when I heard him saying that was "I HOPE you get the chance to experience that depth of hell before you die and that you remember your words when you get there.
That’s exactly right. It’s very obvious that he’s never had to take care of anyone full time, because he can’t understand that her answer was the true answer; the only answer she had.
She just snapped. She showed no self-preservation at all, only remorse and guilt. Anything was better than what she was living. It broke. Being the sole caregiver of an elderly with dementia is extremely tough.
I am taking care of my MOM, But they have money, and I take her to my house for the night, and she stays at her house during the day for 6 hours everyday. I get a break from the million questions from her that she can't help ask. It's NOT the person's fault.
She has compassion fatigue which is a form of PTSD. Many family members get that because they are overwhelmed with taking care of a family member. It drives you insane.
@@madilynramos5720Please what? It is what it is but I didn't say it excused what she did. Hahaha. But apparently you didn't even look up what it was because compassion fatigue is a form of PTSD. Hopefully, even with maturation you will never have to take care of your parents and suffer from this. I know, because I did, but i still didn't kill or harm anyone. But the ones that usually don't suffer from it put their parents in the nursing home. I just couldn't do that.
I keep hearing she has no remorse.. but watching this through, she is being extremely matter-of-fact during all interrogations and interviews. She regrets the situation forcing this to have to become a reality, and by her talking about how she felt about her grandmother, how she respected her, and didn't want to see her being taken advantage of by the other son next door, I think she does regret it and feels remorse. Everything about her interactions seems so sincere. It's such a devastating perfect storm of mental health in the granddaughter and living situation of the grandmother that gave rise to this eventuation. As other comments have mentioned, care-giving is a self-less and difficult task, and can be tiring and lead to burn out in trained and experienced workers in the field.. family members or friends who fall in to that position don't have the luxury to change clients or career.. for the grandmother to have no had any supplemental support or at-home care, despite being referred to as "wealthy", is quite alarming. I can see stories like this becoming more and more common (in more than just the states) as the population ages and if mental health resources aren't as freely available. If I were the sole arbiter of judgement, I'd not send her to jail, but treat her for the mental health. She'll be punishing herself everyday from here on out.😞
This happened because of money, no help from her family, a shitty insurance system, poor infrastructre in this country for helping care for the elderly and infirm. Obviously, it's awful, immoral, and heinous what she did...but somehow I feel almot bad for her. She was clearly unable to cope with the pressure of being her sole caregiver any longer, and realizes just what a horrible thing she did.
This is another case where all of the " family" become blind and deaf to the needs of an elderly parent. It's not like they had to travel to go be with her. The load of caring for the grandmother was obviously left to Heidi. She just needed more help, emotionally and physically. It's such a sad situation to be in. I cannot believe how expensive it is to stay in a nursing home. How can anyone justify charging extortionate costs.?? This should be investigated by someone in power. It seems to me that cost hikes and other financial increases have been the reason that Heidi felt like she had no other option. She also said that Alice's son's are already fighting over the house. None of the family deserve to have any share in whatever estate is left by Alice. It should be donated to an animal sanctuary or some other deserving cause. Rest in peace Alice. I'm sure that she would have forgiven Heidi for her actions.
Honestly, who is going to investigate? The medical system, assisted-living, nursing homes, etc. are all about the money. Everything is about the money. We have a broken system.
@@moimoi2994 I agree that there is no doubt that she is a monster. But the point I was making is that too often the cate and attention of an elderly person falls into the hands of someone who isn't able to cope with the looking after that it entails.
Yes costs are very high, here in Canada also. These places are for profit organizations, they're in it to make money. Having said that, they are expensive to run. Managers, RNs and care aides, cooks, cleaning staff, building maintenance, insurance, rent or taxes etc... Yeah, not cheap.
Okay, so I obviously don't condone what Heidi did at all. But I don't think people realize that insane amount of stress being a caregiver puts on you. I also have a family situation where my grandmother is very old, very sickly, and needs full time care. She refuses to take life-saving medication, is obviously depressed, and turns away all the professionals we bring in to try and help her. My mom is also pretty sick, but she's also a nurse and the only person readily available to help my grandmother out. My uncle travels as a truck driver, and my other uncle passed away years ago. So it's just my mom, me, and my sister. My sister can't drive, and is also sickly. I live on the other side of the state, so I can't help as much as I want to. It falls to my mom. We don't want to put her in assisted living, because when she's gone to those places in the past, she's refused to eat or drink. She declines rapidly very fast. She can't live with my mom, because her house is not handicap accessible and we don't have the money to make it so. I live too far away and work full time. We've thought about having my sister move in with her, but my sister is young (and mentally unwell) and she cannot handle the burden of it. She's stayed with my grandma in the past and has had to make multiple calls to 911 because my grandma couldn't breathe, was in afib, or had some other issue. Finding our grandma in those states and the stress of dealing with paramedics and hospitals and doctors was too much for her to handle, and I don't blame her. My mom doesn't want to move in either, and I don't want her to. She's in her 50s, she's sick, she'd have to give up her dogs, and she deserves time to just exist as her own person in her own space. We've essentially been stuck in this endless cycle for 15 years of being ready to drop everything at a moment's notice and put our lives on hold to be caregivers. Just this week, my mom had to leave work and take my grandma to the hospital because she won't take her heart pills and she went into afib again. That means my mom will spend days once again with my grandma, bringing her everything she needs and dealing with the doctors and then making plans to stay with her afterwards while she recovers. The stress of all of this, despite my mom being a nurse herself, has literally almost killed her. She's had two heart attacks in the last five years. I would never, ever hurt my grandmother. But I can absolutely see how this life could drive a mentally ill person to complete break down and snap.
I feel for you and your family. I understand as I went through a similar situation. I am a retired RN now and like your Mom, cared for my Mom, who got Dementia after a stroke, all by myself in her last days, while working full time. I adored her and wanted these last years to be good, but it was extremely difficult. You feel desperate, alone and crushed by the work, fear, worry, stress... Families used to live together for thousands of years, 3 or 4 generations together could handle these situations and help each other. But today, we end up alone. I wish your family all the best, hang in there! I wish you all peace, strength and happiness. 👋🇨🇦
I went through this for five years with both of my parents at the same time and they passed within five months of each other. Then my husband got early onset vascular dementia and my daughter and I took care of him for twelve years. It's extremely taxing on a healthy individual. It actually made both my daughter and myself sick. If your grandmother needs full time care and there's not a healthy family member that can do it, sometimes hard decisions have to be made. My husband had to go into nursing care the last four months of his life. It was in his best interest.
Although I agree that there were other ways of handling the situation: Family members could have ponied up the money for the home; sons could have relieved Heidi every other day to take care of THEIR mother; applied for home placement assistance or nursing help (not sure if that exists in US); etc., but why was Heidi left to mind this frail lady on a daily basis, no less? The family feel they lost two members?? Well where were you all when those two members needed help??? R.I.P. Alice, and I am so sorry, Heidi, that you were so distraught and at your wit's end to have to deal with this alone.
U are delusional and probably worse than this murderer. I can't believe people like u exist excusing even a little bit for what this monster did to the poor lady. Obviously u would have done the same if u were in her situation. Evil is what u are.
I 💯 % agree with all you said. Being the only caretaker for someone, when there's other family members close by is depressing enough. Not to mention when you are struggling yourself with zero help. Its almost impossible to receive help from anywhere without big $$$$
I so disagree. We dont even know if she was the only one to "struggle " with the sick,confused old grandma. I bet it was a lot she could have done about it. I dont have any sympathy for a person who feel so self senteredand with such self pity , that she choose to kill what she feels she dont want to help. People are getting more selfish and cold nowadays. Its all about themself. I dont get how one can get any happy time, if one know a sick familymember needs help,but one are to busy with ones own needs all the time. How can that even feel ok ...how can one enjoy life being so selfish. Its disturbing ,how one can understand this act that this person did . I mean, listen to her! Putting down the old dog. Like. buhu, i had to clean ,the dog was old, it had diarea... My god...
Elder care, assistance, nursing homes, finances in the USA are so difficult and expensive. If you have never had to solely care for an elderly person all by yourself, you will never know how Heidi came to have this breakdown. I certainly don't condone murder, but with the circumstances she was under with no help, family waiting to inherit her house like vultures and her grandma being so unhappy (which many of that age are as they outlive all of their friends, spouses and people who can understand their complaints). My own mother lived until 98, which most people would think is amazing, but she wasn't happy being on this earth any longer. I feel bad that she is used as an interrogation example.
Millions of people around the world care for their elders until they are in the grave no matter how bad their health/‘mental health gets… many of those people also are much worse off then this lady. She deserves no compassion or leniency for killing a defencelessness old woman who’s on deaths door
In a nation that tells us, "Don't have kids if you can't afford them," it goes unspoken that you also shouldn't have grandparents or parents if you can't afford them as well. "Choose Life" only applies to the unborn, but beyond that we are all completely on our own, especially in the working class. Many many people live in fear of becoming a default caregiver because it's emotionally taxing, financially draining, and - in some cases - physically dangerous. Beyond a perfect world, there is no solution.
I feel so so bad for her. I've been where she's at emotionally due to mental health and barely scraping by; there is only agony and anguish when you reach that last nerve. When you're squeezed between a rock and a hard place with no way out drastic decisions may be made. Let's not forget that millions of families are dealing with these kinds of scenarios everyday. (This is not to lessen the seriousness of the murder and the perpetrator isn't sugar-coating it either.)
She picked one of the most violent ways to kill someone that exists. I can't think of another way to kill someone that lasts longer than drowning, and instills more fear in the victim before death. Besides literal torture. That's fucked beyond belief.
@@master-dukecuthbert5061 You don't watch much true crime do you? If you think drowning is the worst way to go, there are many torture episodes. THAT'S among the worst ways.
This one was hard to watch, as I've felt like Heidi before. Im not a caregiver, but I've had that hopeless, lost, depressed, "about to fucking snap" feeling a few times before. Depression, anxiety and stress can be SO overwhelming, it just takes over every thought.
After failing to drown her she noticed she was still alive and then took the extra step to make sure it wasnt so, all while her defenseless grandmother fought for her life. Wanting to live. There should be No sympathy for murderers. Most of this entire comment section is disgusting and insane. Phones exist, tell someone, anyone. You can also say you can't and don't want to watch her anymore.
@@Devil-Made No, you clearly can't see I reject what you are saying but not from a lack of understanding. There's no excuse for it to have gotten this bad, the one's that make it 'not easy' most of the time is yourself, trust me I know. But you don't know me. I'm nearly in my grave in a few more years and you need to stop making excuses and do better. It's as easy as a simple call or conversation, where did she say she told someone about her thoughts or saught out help for herself and her grandma in turn? She didn't, nice going.
I feel bad for Heidi. She’s obviously struggling with extreme mental health issues. Of course her answers of stress leading to the murder aren’t enough when you’re of sound mind. It takes so little to cause someone with mental illness to snap. The fact that she already had so many issues and yet she was given such an atrocious amount of responsibility for another person, is mind blowing. Someone of sound mind can snap at the amount of stress. I hope she finds peace.
@@kingfr81broo they never turn off their notifications in these interviews, I've seen so fkcign many interviews where they just have that sht turned up all the way 💀💀💀
The government wants every single asset you own to be put in a hospice or old folks home. It’s absolutely ridiculous! I feel the granddaughters pain in her voice. I don’t condone murder but Jesus Christ! Sounds like her sons didn’t give a sh$t. So sad.
I agree that insurance requires people to dissolve all of their assets before they consider paying/placing them into a assisted living center. On top of that the person often has a strong resentment to going into such a place (the grandmother felt this way and was asking her granddaughter to kill her). The constant stress of the situation and with how the other family members were being a hindrance would drive a lot of people insane.
From my dealings with hospice most insurance companies will cover it because it's not usually long term care. My mom had hospice for about a week before she passed away and if it wasn't for them helping me fight the hospital to bring her home she would have died in a hospital or hospital nursing facility 2 hrs away all alone.
It varies in different states as to acquiring the person's property for nursing home, and additional care services. Its very sad. I'm sorry I have no sympathy for this killer. I've been an end of life caregiver to 2 family members and I would never harm them no matter how exhausted and stressed out I was.
My Grandma had Alzheimers and my Mom had Dementia. They both could flip a switch from vulnerable little Angels to cruel and heartless demons towards the end. I can't say I would have ever hurt either one of them, but I can understand this poor girl and her actions. Caring for someone with those things can be overwhelming at times. I hope she is receiving therapy and counseling during her incarceration. Something she definitely couldn't afford outside of the prison walls. Prayers for her and her family. Grandma is at rest now. 😔💔🙏🏽
I think that in Heidi’s mind - and I’m not saying I think she’s right or justified in what she did - Heidi thought that she was sparing her grandmother the pain of slowly dying and having her family be unsupported and uninvolved in her care. I also think Heidi was just overwhelmed with the enormity of her role as a caregiver and she was likely burned completely out by that and her own mental health issues. Many people who have had suicidal ideations have stated that they never felt the action of committing suicide was selfish; it felt like the most UNselfish choice bc they’d be sparing their loved ones from the burden of their mental illness. Again, I’m not condoning what Heidi did and I think the sentence was appropriate to the crime as well as the mitigating factors, I just think that she felt like she was doing a humane thing by putting her grandmother out of her misery (hence the conversation about putting down the white dog in Arizona).
Bless this girl she is doing the only thing she could. Please show her mercy- she is decent and good and the only person in her family who was dealing with the situation. Good luck.
She showed no mercy to the old lady?? Millions of people around the world (many of them poor) care for their elders until they are in the grave, no matter if they have dementia, Alzheimer, etc. This woman deserves no mercy
I was the carer for both my parents at home for several years - my dad took dementia and lost the use of his legs so it was difficult working with him - but my mother became incredibly jealous that he got more attention and started acting up - she became incredibly difficult and would go out of her way to cause problems - self medicating and deliberately putting herself in harms way...! long story short - it was the most difficult time of my entire life - and I got little support from other family members....! A terrible thing this woman did - but I do feel sorry for her as she wasn't in her right mind...!
Heidi obviously needed some help with her mental health issues as well. It bothers me when Investigators , who have no training as Psychologists, ask questions about if she wants to hurt herself and then when Heidi answers, the Investigators just say ok and carry on. WHAT HELP IS THAT ? RIP ALICE 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼♥️
Nope,she got this because she got NEUROTOXINS SSRI Snri ssri then Antipsychotics rat Poison etc lithium Lamictal... they causes this! This is not sny disorder ghr rocking back And forth was toxic damage causing by antipsychotic aka neuroleptic... called tardive dyskinesia aka akathisia and dystonia!
What is the DA talking about… she explained exactly why she did it. It just wasn’t the answer that LE wanted to hear to wrap up the case with a bow. Sad all around!
He really raked my nerves by saying what he did. She was explicitly, truthful, with her answers, and never back tracked, or wavered with her story. If he doesn't like her answer, or doesn't understand it, I would truly like to hear what it is that he wanted her to say, to appease his curiosity. He is obviously, one of those people who will never be put in a situation, even remotely like the one Heidi was forced into.
I’m going through a similar situation. Except I love my Godfather to much to harm him. Struggling with bipolar disorder and taking care of him is melting my brain. I had a brake down the other day. He had me up for about a week. Like all night. I was taking maybe 30 min naps. I was physically ill and had suicidal thoughts. I understand hitting old age is hard but being pushed passed your limits is not right. Someone will get hurt.
@@msquietwomanyes, it's called sleep deprivation and can cause one to feel like one is losing their mind. If my daughter wouldn't have stepped in to help so we could do shifts for sleeping, heaven only knows if I would have snapped or not. So sad this poor granddaughter was not given compassion, certainly not by her family but also not by "the system".
This is so sad in so many ways, she was broken in a bad situation. The sons bickering over their mom's almost condemned house have a lot to answer for.
I can honestly sympathize with her. Nursing homes are incredibly expensive and almost all are self pay. We went thru this with my grama that had dementia. It's terrible. We have to sign her over to the state to receive any help, and let me tell you the government run homes are the worst. I wish we were able to care for her because those places are so understaffed. Our elderly deserve so much better. Nobody can afford it it's insane.
Having cared for my Mother And Father total 20years, I feel her pain. My Dad would sometimes say please don't let me die like your Mother. It's heartbreaking. Heidi 13:40 needed support from her family, which I fortunately had.
I watch a lot of these (may or may not have a true crime addiction 😅), and rarely get triggered by interviewers…. but there is some thing about this detective that just got on my every nerve… from the phone going off from to the obvious efforts to “nail her” by having her acknowledge “that was your intention?“ at every turn to his blunt “try and keep your composure” comments and tone of voice…..ugh. I know to always ask for an attorney no matter what, but with someone like him, I would’ve asked for one just to get him to stop talking to me.!!
I cared for my dad as he deteriorated with cancer right up until the week he passed when he went to the hospice. I now have severe depression and ptsd from seeing the things I saw, there needs to be more support for sole care givers
This is hard to watch! The woman is obviously disturbed and sick and the detective just keep going and going and going... One should think there is some medical assistance
27:15 "...This tragic case baffled the entire city of Eton, Ohio; even after the investigation, people struggled to see any viable reason why she killed Alice. The answers Heidi gave weren't enough to warrant the heinous murder of her grandmother..." Whilst not in any way condoning or agreeing with Heidi's actions; the few sentences transcribed above are by far the most reprehensible part of this case. The willful ignorance, indifference & complete failure to examine their own shortcomings demonstrated by the general population of the city is nothing short of disturbing. Heidi had clearly not been coping with the burden of Alices' care for a long time; yet both her family members & the wider community chose to turn a blind eye. It appears that Eton, Ohio doesn't actually mind the existence of human suffering at all..... ...until & unless they have to be confronted with the reality of it, of course. What's out of sight truly is out of mind...... and if the unseen house of cards collapses, then it can always be someone elses' fault..... right?!!
Very well said. Some things, others cannot understand, because they've never been forced to experience them. I would have to say, that it was not the 'entirety' of the city of Eaton....it is likely more to the fact that those who do understand, are keeping their thoughts and feelings to themselves. I feel very sorry for Heidi, and her Grandmother. It shouldn't have come to this, but there were a lot of contributing factors to consider. I certainly do not want to point a finger at her, ir throw her under the bus. I'll just say a prayer for her, and her Grandma.
I appreciate her honesty and sympathise with the situation and responsibility that was on her shoulders alone. It's a tragic ending for both women. Mental illness is hard on anyone, even worse so with the care given to an elderly person 24/7. 💔💔😢😢
I have subscribed to multiple crime channels and I've NEVER had any ounce of sympathy for a killer. That changed today after watching this video. Poor Heidi😭. May Alice Matheny rest in eternal peace, she was cruelly taken away by her mentally ill granddaughter
This is the first time I find sympathy and understanding for the murderer. I don’t think she is evil-just broken down and overwhelmed. I hope she is shown leniency and compassion 8:04
Millions of people around the world care for their elders until they are in the grave no matter how bad their health/‘mental health gets… many of those people also are much worse off then this lady. She deserves no compassion or leniency for killing a defencelessness old woman who’s on deaths door
This sadly was a mercy killing. This woman knew she couldn’t let the suffering continue and that it would cost her own life. She looked completely defeated and resigned to her fate. Terrible situation.
@@cougar2013I don't. Human life is sacred and it is not ours to take away. Only God* should do that. However on a human level I get that you could be so worn out, depressed and traumatised by caregiving that you could see a 'mercy killing' as a way out. So sad all round.
They should have made her get an attorney as soon as she showed up saying she felt like she "put the dog down". Clearly, she was having a mental breakdown and the last thing she should be doing is rambling to the police. She had long-term trauma and mental issues way before she did the unthinkable and having her recall what she did repeatedly is absolutely detrimental to everything that was unfolding.
My grandmother asked me more than once to come put a bag over her head if they ever tried to take her out of her house to put her into a nursing home. I could understand her fears but of course I could never. She lived to be 97.
My mother said should the day come she had to go to a home she was going to figure out a way to take herself out rather than live in one of those places.
I’m not gonna put that burden on anyone I love but I am gonna take my death into my own hands, if I’m ever at the point of deteriorating beyond return I am going to take a bunch of benzos and fall asleep in the bath.
@@redlamina5937I’m so relieved to hear that I’m not the only person who think ls about this. It’s such a relief to know that that option is always there. As strange as that sounds.
@@dewilew2137 I think about it all the time. I'm almost 60 and my parents are over 80. I worked in long term and memory care for years. I know how hard it can be if you don't have a ton of money.
It is rare that I listen to the first 10 mins of a murder doc and conclude that the murderer is also a victim 😢. To be expected to care for the elderly when you already have some problems of your own is unfair and having seen the toll it can take on a person, I fully understand her actions...
I feel so bad for Heidi. If she had any support from the family, this would probably never happened. The family gets to live guilt-free and place all blame on Heidi, when their inaction was a driving force in this killing. The poor victim had one person left that cared, and tragically, led to her tragic demise.
Being a caregiver is extremely difficult. It's draining physically, mentally, and emotionally. Add that on top of mental illness, and my heart breaks for this family.
If we believe and try to excuse mercy killings, then we might as well excuse honour killings and every other killing, murder is murder, there’s no mercy in drowning your grandma because you’re tired wth
Oh, I certainly don’t mean to suggest we “excuse” mercy killings. I’m just saying that the motive being what she claimed isn’t an irrational conclusion. While I’d definitely say it played a part, her punishment should absolutely be the same. Forcibly “euthanizing” someone out of compassion is still murder.
My heart is broken for Heidi because she put all her efforts and energy into taking care of the grandmother and neglected her own mental and physical health. I’ve seen this happen to many people unfortunately 😢
I was left to take care of my dad by myself while I was still in high school. I actually had to start taking care of him when I was 10 but I wasn't by myself at the time. I had to quit school several times because he would be in the hospital and I would go there and spend the day with him and then when he would get out of the hospital I would stay home and take care of him. I eventually dropped out of high school just to take care of him. My family kept saying they were going to help me but they were busy with their own lives. I finally moved out and left my dad alone because I knew that was the only way they would pitch in and help. I never thought about killing him though.
This woman is sincerely struggling with significant mental health challenges and is in desperate need of genuine support. The over whelming stress she had been enduring has led to a severe breakdown, resulting in this horrible tragedy. It is disheartening to see how the legal system often fails to recognize the true extent of someone's mental health struggles. Deeming others incompetent when they are exaggerating or feigning their condition, while disregarding those who genuinely require assistance. The story she shared about the dog serves as a powerful indication of the persistent torment she had been enduring. This entire situation is truly heart-wrenching.
It's devastating. I feel sorry for the killer for being at her wit's end. She looks terribly sad, the corners of her mouth was down the whole time and defeat written all over her face. She should have spoken to someone about being in this state but she kept it all to herself until she snapped.
I related to her so much. I was the sole caregiver for my 80 year old mother with dementia, while my sibling, who lived 100's of miles away, had power of attorney and made life harder for her and I, and it makes a person think thoughts they never believed they would. Mom's insurance would have paid for assisted living, but my sibling refused to let her go in. My mom said she didn't want to be on earth anymore over and over again. It broke my heart to see her mind break from reality and the terror she experienced because of it. I thought about ending her suffering more than once, but I could never bring myself to do it.
It's never easy to care for an elderly love one. I know, I was a caregiver for my elderly mother for one year who is 89 years old.It's extremely stressful. But, it doesn't give anyone the right to murder the elderly, just because you cannot handle them. Seeking help is the only solution for the stressful outcome for the caregiver. I feel bad for grandma, it wasn't her fault, that she couldn't take care of herself anymore, and she had to pay the price for it. May grandma Rest In Peace.
What a heartbreaking story. I don't even know what to say really. I feel for the grand daughter, but I really wish she could've found resources for her grandma. Is there no caregivers that go to homes for seniors? I live in Canada and seniors that don't want to or aren't ready to go into a care home can get home care. My neighbour has care workers that come twice a day. Our medical system pays for it for low income seniors. Is there nothing like that in America? Poor woman may be at peace in a wonderful afterlife, but I'm sure she would've liked to have gone out on her time, not being murdered. On the other side of the coin, the Grand daughter must've also been going through some serious mental dilemmas and must've thought jail would been better than being with grandma. Very sad indeed. 😢
If we had universal healthcare, this probably wouldn't have happened. The granddaughter would have been able to access mental healthcare she clearly needed. And her grandmother could go to a nursing home, like she wanted.
This is tragic. The hardest thing I’ve ever done was to sit and listen to my 93 yo grandmother complain when I could do nothing and live with her, helping with everything. Nobody will help, there are no breaks. Unless you e done it, you would never understand how mentally and physically exhausting it is. I feel so bad for this lady.
I think its cool ya'll give condolences for the victim and their family before you start your stories. True crime has become kind of cold and tone deaf.
Because there's too many cooks. I noticed everyone now does True Crime because the one case or another they just all the sudden change their format and become this lame True Crime Channel this is a good Channel but literally 90% of the other ones are just garbage
It's why I consistently come back to this channel - thorough back story, great analysis and commentary. But, also showing respect to the victims that too often get lost in the sauce of all the attention paid to the criminal mind.
Oh wow I'm SO glad a lot of people feel the same way I do and have understanding for Heidi. I don't see why the system can't just accept the reasons why Heidi did this. I feel she was being honest. After all she went to the police immediately after killing her grandmother and didn't show any signs of trying to hide anything. Mental health obviously affected Heidi and its sad the judge didn't agree with this. This woman needed to spend time in a mental health facility instead of prison. Of course she was wrong killing her grandmother but things are not always black and white.
I took care of my mom for 10yrs. Finally putting her in nursing home…she eventually came back home but passed away 3 days later. Dying just like she wanted. Asleep in her bed at my house.
I feel bad for Heidi. I stayed with my mother for the last 7 months of her life. She had dementia and it was not easy being with her 24/7. However, i did have the support of my older sister. (She was not in good health herself, so not able to do any lifting or care that was needed by my mom.) We could not afford a nursing home, but Mom was adamantly against going to one. Hospice home health was a great support to us.
I don't understand why it seems to be so difficult not to accept the motivation surrounding the circumstances: I think she was perfectly able to communicate her reasoning behind the murder. I'm happy she got quite a light sentence, considering her mental health issues and good chances of getting better with some professional help and less outward stressors in life.
The U.S. should be ashamed of how they ignore the needs of the elderly and those who cannot afford decent healthcare and nursing home coverage. My family paid $8000 a month for my father who had dementia to be in a nursing home. The nurses and CNA's do NOT get paid enough to work in a nursing home so the nursing homes often lack good medical care.
It seems that way, but think of how it was before there was such a thing as social security. I think LBJ pushed that into being-- so that was really not too long ago. I'm sure there was widespread unhappiness with poor families taking in poor elderly dependents, and probably some suicides among old people.
Super important to reach out to caregivers. Offer help. I don't think they even know when they are overwhelmed and feeling hopeless. 😔 I hate our system so much! 🤬
As a caretaker if you don't have help with the elderly person or disabled person that you care for it can be VERY DIFFICULT to deal with the stress that comes with it. It is NOT easy watching your loved one wither away day by day. Then add to that extra problems with relatives who don't help but take advantage of grandparents when they get that way is VERY STRESSFUL. Add to that someone's mental health problems and you have a recipe for DISASTER.
No, I get it... I have ADHD and am the carer of my brother who has ASD, I've always said if something happened to me and I knew I was dying I might do something to him so he doesn't have to deal with the emotional dysregulation losing another person would inflict upon him. In the years since saying that I have made connections and have a plan in place so he has support but if I didn't have that support network or the government funding I could have definitely pre-planned something bad to prevent his distress. I completely understand her reasoning and don't think the people who are stating she needed a 'reason' are correct. Being a carer is HARD, being a carer with a disability yourself is VERY difficult. In fact, a little over a decade ago when my mum was still his carer, she was severely depressed, our whole household was, and she contemplated driving off the side of the road with my brother so that she wouldn't be suffering anymore and that he wouldn't have to deal with the fallout and anxiety that would come from a parent doing that. We moved and got help and things are a lot better, but it emphasizes how HARD being a carer is. Don't dismiss 'I just wanted her suffering to end'. It's valid, not saying she should have gotten a shorter sentence or that she was innocent, simply that I understand and empathize.
I feel bad for some people who feel they can't confront toxic people and detach from them... I pride myself in never being stuck in a situation like this or a bad relationship or over bearing parents... Life is too short to slave for other people
I don't have a strong bond with a majority of my family (a couple I'm completely no contact with) because it's filled to the brim with narcissism and enabling. It's like a f*cking cult😬 I go to therapy and take my meds. With all the money I spend on both and the growth I've realized, I'll be damned if I let those mfs bring me back into the abyss!
Its not to "slave for other people" , to help your closest family. And exuse ne , "toxic people" , is that what you call a confused suck old grandma?? Your parents didnt look at it as "slave for you" when you grew up either. Im all for enhoying life, but it is quite possible to do that, without being cold and selfish all the time. I wouldnt enjoy my life,knowing that a close one suffered and needed my help,thats for sure. Life its to short for that kind of selfishness.
Although I did not kill my grandmother, she died completely on her own, I have to say that I understand why a granddaughter might want to put an end to her grandmothers life. Not all grandmas are cute and sweet. Some are actually the devil incarnate.
You come across as very self centered. Heidi loved her grandma. It's not her fault Alice's son next door also selfish and unaware letting his daughter run in and out messing up the place. The son never offering to help. Heidi has her own mental health problems. She heard problems with out solutions daily and probably snapped. I bet If an older relative needed help you wouldn't help.
This is the only video that I haven’t been able to finish. It’s so disturbing because this woman is NOT a killer. This was a desperate woman at the end of her mental rope. There’s no excuse for her actions, but what a tragedy for everyone.
What I find remarkable, is if an individual ends a life, it's called murder or manslaughter, but if an hospital provides a woeful lack of care, that results in a grotesque snapped leg and head strike (in less than 4 hours after being admitted to ward) that effectively ends the quality of life of a patient, it's apparently ok. This happened to my 71 y/o mom. Then she was thrown into a nursing home, after previously living in her own home.
Health/senior care will never be affordable as long as it's for-profit. The corporations that run things are never satisfied with a reasonable profit, they always want to squeeze out more money for themselves.
Ridiculous. She should never have been charged, let alone convicted and sentenced to life in prison. The woman needed help, not imprisonment. The judge who deemed her mentally fit to stand trial is a moron.
She literally took somebody’s life. She doesn’t get excuses. Plenty of people are mentally ill and would never or could never carry such an abhorrent act. This is such a disgusting thing to say. She is not the victim in this case.
Are we going to judge things on how we feel about the person? It's good to take mitigating circumstances into consideration, but the crime itself must be punished. Who is to say there won't be copycats who use this to get away with murder. We get your situation but you did wrong is the message to send.
This was no cold-hearted killer, but a worn-out, despairing woman with her own problems to face. Society just dumped it all on her, and situation would have been entirely different if care for the elderly had been within her financial range.
Yeah some of these videos I watched just are infuriating. I thought that I was a criminal when I was a kid I even went to jail and missed out on High School... 25 years later I mean half the stuff that I even here like shoplifting I would never do that. I mean that's bad enough of killing people is horrible
@materockk1579 For sure! I almost bought a Cane Corso for my mom last year. I had her move in next door to me instead, but I agree. If they are elderly and alone, they need some kind of protection. Dog, alarm, something to help them. It's such a sad thought, but it's true...
As someone who helped take care of my father and then my mother as they both died from complications of mental health. They were both schizophrenic and let themselves waste away despite our best efforts. It RUINED my Mom's mental health watching Dad go thru that and then she put herself thru it! It's maddening when Mom is doing everything she used to yell at or get mad at my Dad for doing. It seriously messed me and my family up as well.
Her family dumped all the responsibility on a mentally Ill young woman. Sounds like the family didn’t give one shit about either Heidi or her Grandmother. What a tragic situation.
Exactly my thoughts. If money becomes an issue and you are left with a situation you can not handle yourself... Very difficult.
I don't know if she is mentally ill, but she is definitely suffering from compassion fatigue, a form of PTSD and suffering from exhaustion.
I really feel for this woman, caring for a dementia patient can break you. Family often leave it all to one person. Trust me, I know!
@@ItsOnlyMeAgainyou feel for this killer?
I had a similar situation with my two aunties. They never get married and all the responsibilities fell on me and my mother. I lived almost 7 years, of my young adult life, taking care of them. I ended up in debt, and it was super hard due to my mental issue. I was actually relieved when they finally found peace. I have been and will be always a supporter of euthanasia. That is no life for anyone.
I feel sorry for this kind of situation.
Family member being sole 24/7 caregiver for someone with dementia is brutal and can destroy the caregiver mentally.
It’s incredibly difficult.
Thats true. Still no excuse to murder them.
@@doriangrey9702 Of course
Yet, I would NEVER do that to my Mamaw!
No one said she had dementia
I have nothing but sympathy for both the victim and the perp in this case. When my dad had his big stroke in 2009 I literally watched the person he had been drain away out of his body over the course of a couple of hours. We were lucky, we have good healthcare in the UK and my dad had a sufficient estate to cover nursing home costs. He lived another six years but the man we buried on October 21 2015 wasn't my dad anymore, and hadn't been for a long time. We had made a pact, my siblings and me, to never fight over money, to share all responsibilities as and when necessary and to always present a united front despite our many differences, and we did this. And that's how our dad's last years had at least a semblance of dignity. This poor woman will never achieve the peace of mind she so desperately seeks, and a society - and family - that allows a situation like this to arise is worthy of nothing but contempt. I am so, so sorry.
My dad had dementia when he fell and broke his hip. It was replaced but he never walked again. The dementia just ate him up. He was down to 105lbs with horrendous bed sores. I went to feed him as usual and I could smell him. He was on the 2nd floor. That broke me. Just absolutely broke me. I kept thinking that if he was an animal in that condition I'd be in jail for abuse. But because he was human we had to let him suffer. I understand Heidi's action. If I could have, I would have ended his suffering that day. And to tell the truth, my suffering as well. I was the only child who cared for him. The rest never even visited. It was brutal having to watch him shrivel up and die. And then be told I overstepped my authority when I told the doctor DNR. Who the hell wants to come back to that so called life? Sigh... Sometimes families suck!!😢
This society is beyond despicable. How many people are literally living on the street, drowning themselves because they were LGBT and tortured + disowned, veterans in the army, and/or victims of extreme abuse living with trauma? Yet, there they are, being shamed and used up, exploited, and degraded into oblivion while abandoned because "they're not popular, worth a dime for anyone socially and have not a ton of coins to extract from them every month". Some of them are denied, repeatedly, for disability or never had a stable job to pay into it. They face ice, cold, starvation, exposure, cruel treatment, humiliation, and constant shame, distress, ostracism, and more. Yeah, no ... Nobody cares about how people caring for those who can't help themselves, are losing their mind and can't afford to place them into nursing. Society will blame you for stealing food to survive, losing health from abuse, snapping & defending yourself from cruelty, being poor, or going insane.
Her family left her alone in this difficult time, that's contrary to what you experienced. Not fighting over money is noble but she didn't have such a supporting family.
@@stefan.5987 That literally what I said.
@@rodmorrison47 I ment her support of her family, that's different to what you guys came to terms with. They left her alone and triggered the whole situation. Nvm.
It’s a rarity for me to ever have any sympathy whatsoever for a killer when I’m watching these, but several things are clear here. Heidi is clearly struggling with severe mental health issues. Heidi really thought killing her grandmother was in the best interest of her grandmother. And while Heidi wasn’t remorseful in respect to thinking she shouldn’t have done what she did, she was still clearly mortified by what she had done. Just a terribly sad situation all the way around. Heidi does deserve some kind of punishment but it’s still so very sad.
and the fucking interviewers? The one, clearly, is trying to get more charges added on.
First time I have felt the same way. Seems like everything had fallen to her in respects to her grandmothers care and she was feeling the strain for a long time. These are the people that have no real support system, and slip through the cracks in terms of social support. 😢
You read my mind.
It's called "compassion fatigue" and it should be a mitigating factor in her sentencing. This is what you get in the US health system when it is chronically underfunded user pays and people are basically left without supports in a first world country that can completely support them.
So Heidi is trotted off to a prison and becomes another number in the country that imprisons more people than anywhere else on earth - why?
Because it is a good business model - imagine having clients trapped in a cell who cannot complain and have to eat the muck you serve and sleep on the pillows you give them?
Perfect business model.
rant over.
@@BrenMurphy1You missed out the slave labour.
$289 a day for a nursing home!?!? Dear God 😳. That’s 104,040 a year. An insurance wouldn’t cover it? Our system is broken 🤦🏽♂️.
It's broken. And everybody that knows how to take advantage of it.. does so
It was because she owned a house. Nursing homes want your house first and then insurance will kick in after all that money is gone. Yes I know from experience.
That's a cheap nursing home. That's the cost of a hospital stay. Nice nursing homes are much more expensive.
@@debby8428and all she had to do was sign on the dotted line. The granddaughter said the place was a dump.
A lot of people don’t know you have to give the government all your assets! It’s absolutely wrong. So the best thing to do is “sell” your home to a trusted person So this will ensure the family home will be saved.
I actually feel bad for this woman. At the very least she was honest. I feel bad she felt she needed to do this, I can't imagine what her grandma's final thoughts were.
I hope this woman can also find some peace. Her family should be ashamed
Agree. She needed support!
Sad that the doctor that said "send her to a home" didn't suggest financial options for that. Oh, now there are resources when an innocent old lady died. Fuck everyone involved that sat and did nothing until this happened. This whole broken system relies on it's victims having friends and family when some people have none. Why go to them if you will only be tossed onto your family in the end. Until this ends stuff like this will go on and it will get worse.
Why? There are millions of people in similar or worse situations that don’t do this. She deserves all the mental anguish and psychological torture daily.
Why? There are millions of people in similar or worse situations that don’t do this. She deserves all the mental anguish and psychological torture daily.
Maybe if clowns didn’t blindly support cops, and qualified/absolute immunity and voted for smaller government we would go back to a time when resources were plenty.
I really did not expect to feel sympathy for the perpetrator coming into this, but I do.
Caregiving is an incredibly stressful role to take on - especially when you have no assistance and no money. Sometimes caring for an aging/sick family member can last for decades, leaving no room to live one's own life or focus on having a family.
I'm not defending her actions but this woman just seem so broken, and this being the only way out in her mind is tragic.
@CandidBanter
If she was on meth the headline would say "Meth fueled murderer killed grandma" since cops always do a drug test. I feel sorry for her. She cracked.
@CandidBanter She wasn't on drugs. She's already been tried and is serving her time, it's not like this just happened. They would have done a full physical exam, including drug test, upon intake. What you're seeing is a nervous breakdown. I read the report, there was no mention of drugs. Apparently, she is mentally ill, although it didn't say exactly what the illness was.
@@Kristine_202why would you think they do a full physical exam in jail? That's not true. You're just assuming that and I'm not sure why. You think they drug test every person that goes to jail? They don't. They don't even give adequate care to those who need it while incarcerated. If an inmate is going to be there for an extended period of time or if they're going to be transferred to a prison then they will test for various diseases, particularly stds and they will drug test if contraband has entered the facility and they're looking to bring further charges on someone they suspect of using while in jail but they don't just test every person who comes in, just because.
So just fucking kill grandma cause it's hard for you?
@domdonald Parents choose to have their children; children do not have the option to choose the family they are born into.
If parents reach a point in their life where they decide that they no longer wish to raise their children, adoption is an option available to them. Whereas people can't simply "give away" their responsibility to their elders, no matter how they ended up being the unwilling caregivers to them.
What’s sad is Alice’s own children didn’t help her it was all on Heidi! Hearing and seeing all she had to see and what disorders she had just over drived her
It doesn’t seem to matter how many adults could and should help with the care of their elderly members, in my personal experience, it usually falls to one person.. not in any way condoning what she did, being an only caregiver is extremely stressful and exhausting, without the added issues of mental disorders.. the extended family , that let her take on all of the responsibility for care, should bear some responsibility for this sad result.
My mom passed last October. I cared for her 5 years as an only child. Because of dementia, the last year she called me terrible insults and became mean towards me. I never ONCE thought of killing or hurting her although I did take lot's of time outs. There's always an alternative to hurting someone.
I sympathize with your situation & in no way condone her final decision but she suffers from mental health issues too, which makes what she would have been feeling 1000 times worse!
@@Earthbound369You can't expect everyone to be able to handle it like you did. What you described sounds like pure hell.
@susanivy3619 she was desperate, maybe also fed up with the whole situation. If your own family leaves you alone, i want to know how you would react. I'm not defending her actions but I can somehow relate to how it feels being helpless. I guess you never were in such a situation, so how could you know better. 🤷♂️
Granddaughter's situation is as tragic as grandma's. They reached out for help to no avail. Cops and prosecutor maligned granddaughter terribly as she eloquently explained her thinking. Sad all around.
That Prosecutor has ZERO idea what it's like to go through caretaker fatigue and how damaging it is to that person.
Caregiver fatigue is very real. This woman didn't do this to hurt that woman, she really believed that she was giving her peace. How terrible.
By drowning her? Lol
I mean most caregivers will not choose to murder even in those circumstances. As much as it’s easy to empathize with Heidi, it’s also right for her to answer to the law and face the consequences for her actions.
@@extoferwhen did anyone say that she shouldn’t have faced consequences?
@redmarioproductions in her mind, yes, by drowning her.
@@dewilew2137 I didn’t say anyone did.
I find it disgusting that this lady was the only one helping grandma.
Where are here kids?
Worried about their mothers estate!
I worked in a nursing home. It is not easy. This lady deserved a break and family should have traded days. She lived to her 90s. Bless her heart.
She deserved to fulfill her life.
Heidi is heartbroken.
But I can understand the pressure and stress along with having her own issues.
I feel for both these ladies. 😞💔
That prosecuting attorney at the end really bugged me. "she hasn't been able to explain to MY SATISFACTION why she did this." HIS satisfaction. She explained why she did it. She displayed significant mental health struggles and anguish during the interviews. Clearly she was at her wits end and unable to cope any longer. That doesn't excuse what she did but it sure does explain it. I wish she had been able to find some good support to help her through that period. Luckily for me, I did find support in a similar situation. I condemn her actions, but don't condemn her, if that makes any sense.
I agree, her explanations were very precise. She felt utterly at the end of her rope. It’s annoying how the interviewers are trying really hard to get her to confess to first degree murder. I wish she would have had a lawyer to begin with.
☮️🍃
My first thought when I heard him saying that was "I HOPE you get the chance to experience that depth of hell before you die and that you remember your words when you get there.
I know right! He made me sick! What a self righteous twat
That’s exactly right. It’s very obvious that he’s never had to take care of anyone full time, because he can’t understand that her answer was the true answer; the only answer she had.
She just snapped. She showed no self-preservation at all, only remorse and guilt. Anything was better than what she was living. It broke. Being the sole caregiver of an elderly with dementia is extremely tough.
Im so glad i dont know you
I am taking care of my MOM, But they have money, and I take her to my house for the night, and she stays at her house during the day for 6 hours everyday. I get a break from the million questions from her that she can't help ask. It's NOT the person's fault.
I feel bad for saying there is no excuse. Why she didnt just walk away? Let it be. But the interrogation is heartbreaking. What does one do?
She has compassion fatigue which is a form of PTSD.
Many family members get that because they are overwhelmed with taking care of a family member.
It drives you insane.
Oh whatever 🙄🤢
@@madilynramos5720Please what? It is what it is but I didn't say it excused what she did. Hahaha.
But apparently you didn't even look up what it was because compassion fatigue is a form of PTSD.
Hopefully, even with maturation you will never have to take care of your parents and suffer from this.
I know, because I did, but i still didn't kill or harm anyone.
But the ones that usually don't suffer from it put their parents in the nursing home. I just couldn't do that.
The family killed Alice, by forcing one granddaughter to shoulder her care all alone.
I keep hearing she has no remorse.. but watching this through, she is being extremely matter-of-fact during all interrogations and interviews. She regrets the situation forcing this to have to become a reality, and by her talking about how she felt about her grandmother, how she respected her, and didn't want to see her being taken advantage of by the other son next door, I think she does regret it and feels remorse. Everything about her interactions seems so sincere.
It's such a devastating perfect storm of mental health in the granddaughter and living situation of the grandmother that gave rise to this eventuation. As other comments have mentioned, care-giving is a self-less and difficult task, and can be tiring and lead to burn out in trained and experienced workers in the field.. family members or friends who fall in to that position don't have the luxury to change clients or career.. for the grandmother to have no had any supplemental support or at-home care, despite being referred to as "wealthy", is quite alarming.
I can see stories like this becoming more and more common (in more than just the states) as the population ages and if mental health resources aren't as freely available.
If I were the sole arbiter of judgement, I'd not send her to jail, but treat her for the mental health. She'll be punishing herself everyday from here on out.😞
Me,2. She needs help not prison. Shame on the siblings for leaving everything up to her
Its happing in Ireland ALSO
She did have remorse, But again, she thought her Grandmother should be with GOD.
this one hurts.. so complicated. my heart breaks for Heidi and Alice.. it’s really unfortunate that things end up this way.
It can be difficult to care for a elderly family as I speak from experience. This is a sad case.
I love how they ask if she wants to hurt herself and when she says yes, they like ok well…… Let me ask you the same question 10xs!
Didn't even acknowledge her pain. At all. That's why she needed medical professionals.
That irked my nerves
This happened because of money, no help from her family, a shitty insurance system, poor infrastructre in this country for helping care for the elderly and infirm. Obviously, it's awful, immoral, and heinous what she did...but somehow I feel almot bad for her. She was clearly unable to cope with the pressure of being her sole caregiver any longer, and realizes just what a horrible thing she did.
This is another case where all of the " family" become blind and deaf to the needs of an elderly parent. It's not like they had to travel to go be with her. The load of caring for the grandmother was obviously left to Heidi. She just needed more help, emotionally and physically. It's such a sad situation to be in.
I cannot believe how expensive it is to stay in a nursing home. How can anyone justify charging extortionate costs.?? This should be investigated by someone in power. It seems to me that cost hikes and other financial increases have been the reason that Heidi felt like she had no other option.
She also said that Alice's son's are already fighting over the house.
None of the family deserve to have any share in whatever estate is left by Alice. It should be donated to an animal sanctuary or some other deserving cause.
Rest in peace Alice. I'm sure that she would have forgiven Heidi for her actions.
That's no excuse to murder your grandmother....I'm pretty sure her grandmother also took care of her and didn't drown her....she is a monsyer
Honestly, who is going to investigate? The medical system, assisted-living, nursing homes, etc. are all about the money. Everything is about the money. We have a broken system.
@@moimoi2994 I agree that there is no doubt that she is a monster. But the point I was making is that too often the cate and attention of an elderly person falls into the hands of someone who isn't able to cope with the looking after that it entails.
Yes costs are very high, here in Canada also.
These places are for profit organizations, they're in it to make money.
Having said that, they are expensive to run.
Managers, RNs and care aides, cooks, cleaning staff, building maintenance, insurance, rent or taxes etc...
Yeah, not cheap.
One of my best friends takes care of my grandmother. I don't know how she does it. She is majorly stressed out.
Okay, so I obviously don't condone what Heidi did at all. But I don't think people realize that insane amount of stress being a caregiver puts on you. I also have a family situation where my grandmother is very old, very sickly, and needs full time care. She refuses to take life-saving medication, is obviously depressed, and turns away all the professionals we bring in to try and help her. My mom is also pretty sick, but she's also a nurse and the only person readily available to help my grandmother out. My uncle travels as a truck driver, and my other uncle passed away years ago. So it's just my mom, me, and my sister. My sister can't drive, and is also sickly. I live on the other side of the state, so I can't help as much as I want to. It falls to my mom. We don't want to put her in assisted living, because when she's gone to those places in the past, she's refused to eat or drink. She declines rapidly very fast. She can't live with my mom, because her house is not handicap accessible and we don't have the money to make it so. I live too far away and work full time. We've thought about having my sister move in with her, but my sister is young (and mentally unwell) and she cannot handle the burden of it. She's stayed with my grandma in the past and has had to make multiple calls to 911 because my grandma couldn't breathe, was in afib, or had some other issue. Finding our grandma in those states and the stress of dealing with paramedics and hospitals and doctors was too much for her to handle, and I don't blame her. My mom doesn't want to move in either, and I don't want her to. She's in her 50s, she's sick, she'd have to give up her dogs, and she deserves time to just exist as her own person in her own space.
We've essentially been stuck in this endless cycle for 15 years of being ready to drop everything at a moment's notice and put our lives on hold to be caregivers. Just this week, my mom had to leave work and take my grandma to the hospital because she won't take her heart pills and she went into afib again. That means my mom will spend days once again with my grandma, bringing her everything she needs and dealing with the doctors and then making plans to stay with her afterwards while she recovers. The stress of all of this, despite my mom being a nurse herself, has literally almost killed her. She's had two heart attacks in the last five years. I would never, ever hurt my grandmother. But I can absolutely see how this life could drive a mentally ill person to complete break down and snap.
I’m sorry to hear this. I hope things turn around and your family finds peace.
You are absolutely right. It can be so hard to take care of elders.
I feel for you and your family.
I understand as I went through a similar situation.
I am a retired RN now and like your Mom, cared for my Mom, who got Dementia after a stroke, all by myself in her last days, while working full time.
I adored her and wanted these last years to be good, but it was extremely difficult.
You feel desperate, alone and crushed by the work, fear, worry, stress...
Families used to live together for thousands of years, 3 or 4 generations together could handle these situations and help each other. But today, we end up alone.
I wish your family all the best, hang in there!
I wish you all peace, strength and happiness.
👋🇨🇦
I went through this for five years with both of my parents at the same time and they passed within five months of each other. Then my husband got early onset vascular dementia and my daughter and I took care of him for twelve years. It's extremely taxing on a healthy individual. It actually made both my daughter and myself sick. If your grandmother needs full time care and there's not a healthy family member that can do it, sometimes hard decisions have to be made. My husband had to go into nursing care the last four months of his life. It was in his best interest.
So this is just like saying..... "I'm not victim blaming, but......."
Heidi doesn't deserve a pass.
Although I agree that there were other ways of handling the situation: Family members could have ponied up the money for the home; sons could have relieved Heidi every other day to take care of THEIR mother; applied for home placement assistance or nursing help (not sure if that exists in US); etc., but why was Heidi left to mind this frail lady on a daily basis, no less? The family feel they lost two members?? Well where were you all when those two members needed help??? R.I.P. Alice, and I am so sorry, Heidi, that you were so distraught and at your wit's end to have to deal with this alone.
U are delusional and probably worse than this murderer. I can't believe people like u exist excusing even a little bit for what this monster did to the poor lady. Obviously u would have done the same if u were in her situation. Evil is what u are.
❤❤❤❤❤
I 💯 % agree with all you said.
Being the only caretaker for someone, when there's other family members close by is depressing enough. Not to mention when you are struggling yourself with zero help. Its almost impossible to receive help from anywhere without big $$$$
Health care sucks in the US on all levels. There is extreme income inequality
I so disagree. We dont even know if she was the only one to "struggle " with the sick,confused old grandma.
I bet it was a lot she could have done about it. I dont have any sympathy for a person who feel so self senteredand with such self pity , that she choose to kill what she feels she dont want to help.
People are getting more selfish and cold nowadays. Its all about themself. I dont get how one can get any happy time, if one know a sick familymember needs help,but one are to busy with ones own needs all the time. How can that even feel ok ...how can one enjoy life being so selfish.
Its disturbing ,how one can understand this act that this person did .
I mean, listen to her! Putting down the old dog.
Like. buhu, i had to clean ,the dog was old, it had diarea...
My god...
I feel so sad for Heidi. She is not a monster. She was at her wits end.
Elder care, assistance, nursing homes, finances in the USA are so difficult and expensive. If you have never had to solely care for an elderly person all by yourself, you will never know how Heidi came to have this breakdown. I certainly don't condone murder, but with the circumstances she was under with no help, family waiting to inherit her house like vultures and her grandma being so unhappy (which many of that age are as they outlive all of their friends, spouses and people who can understand their complaints). My own mother lived until 98, which most people would think is amazing, but she wasn't happy being on this earth any longer. I feel bad that she is used as an interrogation example.
The only case where I feel bad for the killer
I think she had a breakdown.
Sad thing is no one will change any legislation because, of this.
Millions of people around the world care for their elders until they are in the grave no matter how bad their health/‘mental health gets… many of those people also are much worse off then this lady. She deserves no compassion or leniency for killing a defencelessness old woman who’s on deaths door
@@Marigold502 No she didn't people always want to play crazy when they kill somebody 🙄
In a nation that tells us, "Don't have kids if you can't afford them," it goes unspoken that you also shouldn't have grandparents or parents if you can't afford them as well. "Choose Life" only applies to the unborn, but beyond that we are all completely on our own, especially in the working class. Many many people live in fear of becoming a default caregiver because it's emotionally taxing, financially draining, and - in some cases - physically dangerous. Beyond a perfect world, there is no solution.
We need more outreach to check on caregivers and their elderly family member. It’s an extremely stressful situation for both people.
I feel so so bad for her. I've been where she's at emotionally due to mental health and barely scraping by; there is only agony and anguish when you reach that last nerve. When you're squeezed between a rock and a hard place with no way out drastic decisions may be made. Let's not forget that millions of families are dealing with these kinds of scenarios everyday. (This is not to lessen the seriousness of the murder and the perpetrator isn't sugar-coating it either.)
She picked one of the most violent ways to kill someone that exists. I can't think of another way to kill someone that lasts longer than drowning, and instills more fear in the victim before death. Besides literal torture. That's fucked beyond belief.
@@master-dukecuthbert5061 You don't watch much true crime do you? If you think drowning is the worst way to go, there are many torture episodes. THAT'S among the worst ways.
This one was hard to watch, as I've felt like Heidi before. Im not a caregiver, but I've had that hopeless, lost, depressed, "about to fucking snap" feeling a few times before. Depression, anxiety and stress can be SO overwhelming, it just takes over every thought.
After failing to drown her she noticed she was still alive and then took the extra step to make sure it wasnt so, all while her defenseless grandmother fought for her life. Wanting to live. There should be No sympathy for murderers. Most of this entire comment section is disgusting and insane. Phones exist, tell someone, anyone. You can also say you can't and don't want to watch her anymore.
@@F11-c1u spoken like someone with a lot of life experience yet to gain. I wish it were that easy, my friend.
@@Devil-Made No, you clearly can't see I reject what you are saying but not from a lack of understanding. There's no excuse for it to have gotten this bad, the one's that make it 'not easy' most of the time is yourself, trust me I know. But you don't know me. I'm nearly in my grave in a few more years and you need to stop making excuses and do better. It's as easy as a simple call or conversation, where did she say she told someone about her thoughts or saught out help for herself and her grandma in turn? She didn't, nice going.
@@F11-c1u seems like you're in the minority with this one
@@erinkinsella91 And it matters not.
I feel bad for Heidi. She’s obviously struggling with extreme mental health issues. Of course her answers of stress leading to the murder aren’t enough when you’re of sound mind. It takes so little to cause someone with mental illness to snap. The fact that she already had so many issues and yet she was given such an atrocious amount of responsibility for another person, is mind blowing. Someone of sound mind can snap at the amount of stress. I hope she finds peace.
The knucklehead cop doesn’t even have the sense to turn off his phone when interviewing an admitted murderer. Really folks….
@@kingfr81broo they never turn off their notifications in these interviews, I've seen so fkcign many interviews where they just have that sht turned up all the way 💀💀💀
She could have refused to be the caretaker and let other family members figure it out.
@@writerabc feel like that's definitely more easier said than done, seemed like no one wanted anything to do with this poor old woman (family-wise)
The government wants every single asset you own to be put in a hospice or old folks home. It’s absolutely ridiculous! I feel the granddaughters pain in her voice. I don’t condone murder but Jesus Christ! Sounds like her sons didn’t give a sh$t. So sad.
I agree that insurance requires people to dissolve all of their assets before they consider paying/placing them into a assisted living center. On top of that the person often has a strong resentment to going into such a place (the grandmother felt this way and was asking her granddaughter to kill her). The constant stress of the situation and with how the other family members were being a hindrance would drive a lot of people insane.
From my dealings with hospice most insurance companies will cover it because it's not usually long term care. My mom had hospice for about a week before she passed away and if it wasn't for them helping me fight the hospital to bring her home she would have died in a hospital or hospital nursing facility 2 hrs away all alone.
It varies in different states as to acquiring the person's property for nursing home, and additional care services. Its very sad. I'm sorry I have no sympathy for this killer. I've been an end of life caregiver to 2 family members and I would never harm them no matter how exhausted and stressed out I was.
@@doriangrey9702 here in Texas they will drain you dry from every penny! They even take bank accounts! It’s disgusting
@@Naomi-pq6tvstupid comment.
My Grandma had Alzheimers and my Mom had Dementia. They both could flip a switch from vulnerable little Angels to cruel and heartless demons towards the end.
I can't say I would have ever hurt either one of them, but I can understand this poor girl and her actions. Caring for someone with those things can be overwhelming at times.
I hope she is receiving therapy and counseling during her incarceration. Something she definitely couldn't afford outside of the prison walls.
Prayers for her and her family. Grandma is at rest now. 😔💔🙏🏽
So sad and tragic. She got overwhelmed by her situation that she "lost her mind". I feel so sorry for both of them.
I think that in Heidi’s mind - and I’m not saying I think she’s right or justified in what she did - Heidi thought that she was sparing her grandmother the pain of slowly dying and having her family be unsupported and uninvolved in her care. I also think Heidi was just overwhelmed with the enormity of her role as a caregiver and she was likely burned completely out by that and her own mental health issues. Many people who have had suicidal ideations have stated that they never felt the action of committing suicide was selfish; it felt like the most UNselfish choice bc they’d be sparing their loved ones from the burden of their mental illness.
Again, I’m not condoning what Heidi did and I think the sentence was appropriate to the crime as well as the mitigating factors, I just think that she felt like she was doing a humane thing by putting her grandmother out of her misery (hence the conversation about putting down the white dog in Arizona).
Bless this girl she is doing the only thing she could. Please show her mercy- she is decent and good and the only person in her family who was dealing with the situation. Good luck.
Bro wtf is wrong with you
She’s struggling with so much pain and grief. Poor Heidi, I wish her luck as well.
☮️🍃
Im so so glad i dont know you
You want me to feel sorry for the grand daughter. You just as sick as her! Please get evaluated asap!
She showed no mercy to the old lady?? Millions of people around the world (many of them poor) care for their elders until they are in the grave, no matter if they have dementia, Alzheimer, etc. This woman deserves no mercy
I was the carer for both my parents at home for several years - my dad took dementia and lost the use of his legs so it was difficult working with him - but my mother became incredibly jealous that he got more attention and started acting up - she became incredibly difficult and would go out of her way to cause problems - self medicating and deliberately putting herself in harms way...!
long story short - it was the most difficult time of my entire life - and I got little support from other family members....!
A terrible thing this woman did - but I do feel sorry for her as she wasn't in her right mind...!
Thank you for THINKING, analysing more deeply, and being less *judgemental* than most people here.
It's rarely as simple as it seems.
@@Lola-AreaCode212Absolutely, It’s NEVER as simple as it seems.
Heidi obviously needed some help with her mental health issues as well. It bothers me when Investigators , who have no training as Psychologists, ask questions about if she wants to hurt herself and then when Heidi answers, the Investigators just say ok and carry on. WHAT HELP IS THAT ? RIP ALICE 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼♥️
Are they psychiatrist? They are INVESTIGATORS...
Nope,she got this because she got NEUROTOXINS SSRI Snri ssri then Antipsychotics rat Poison etc lithium Lamictal... they causes this!
This is not sny disorder ghr rocking back And forth was toxic damage causing by antipsychotic aka neuroleptic... called tardive dyskinesia aka akathisia and dystonia!
What is the DA talking about… she explained exactly why she did it. It just wasn’t the answer that LE wanted to hear to wrap up the case with a bow. Sad all around!
He really raked my nerves by saying what he did. She was explicitly, truthful, with her answers, and never back tracked, or wavered with her story. If he doesn't like her answer, or doesn't understand it, I would truly like to hear what it is that he wanted her to say, to appease his curiosity. He is obviously, one of those people who will never be put in a situation, even remotely like the one Heidi was forced into.
I’m going through a similar situation. Except I love my Godfather to much to harm him. Struggling with bipolar disorder and taking care of him is melting my brain. I had a brake down the other day. He had me up for about a week. Like all night. I was taking maybe 30 min naps. I was physically ill and had suicidal thoughts. I understand hitting old age is hard but being pushed passed your limits is not right. Someone will get hurt.
Breh what? He had you up for a week?
Hang in there. Check into whether or not respite care is available in your area.
@@msquietwomanyes, it's called sleep deprivation and can cause one to feel like one is losing their mind. If my daughter wouldn't have stepped in to help so we could do shifts for sleeping, heaven only knows if I would have snapped or not. So sad this poor granddaughter was not given compassion, certainly not by her family but also not by "the system".
Brakes for your car? Sorry, that part is confusing because you cant spell "break". Lol.
I love how baffled the detectives are.. so much time in between questions .. clearly this is not their typical murder case
This is so sad in so many ways, she was broken in a bad situation. The sons bickering over their mom's almost condemned house have a lot to answer for.
I can honestly sympathize with her. Nursing homes are incredibly expensive and almost all are self pay. We went thru this with my grama that had dementia. It's terrible. We have to sign her over to the state to receive any help, and let me tell you the government run homes are the worst. I wish we were able to care for her because those places are so understaffed. Our elderly deserve so much better. Nobody can afford it it's insane.
Having cared for my Mother And Father total 20years, I feel her pain. My Dad would sometimes say please don't let me die like your Mother. It's heartbreaking. Heidi 13:40 needed support from her family, which I fortunately had.
I feel so much better knowing everyone else felt bad for her too 😭
I watch a lot of these (may or may not have a true crime addiction 😅), and rarely get triggered by interviewers…. but there is some thing about this detective that just got on my every nerve… from the phone going off from to the obvious efforts to “nail her” by having her acknowledge “that was your intention?“ at every turn to his blunt “try and keep your composure” comments and tone of voice…..ugh. I know to always ask for an attorney no matter what, but with someone like him, I would’ve asked for one just to get him to stop talking to me.!!
I cared for my dad as he deteriorated with cancer right up until the week he passed when he went to the hospice. I now have severe depression and ptsd from seeing the things I saw, there needs to be more support for sole care givers
This is hard to watch!
The woman is obviously disturbed and sick and the detective just keep going and going and going...
One should think there is some medical assistance
27:15 "...This tragic case baffled the entire city of Eton, Ohio; even after the investigation, people struggled to see any viable reason why she killed Alice. The answers Heidi gave weren't enough to warrant the heinous murder of her grandmother..."
Whilst not in any way condoning or agreeing with Heidi's actions; the few sentences transcribed above are by far the most reprehensible part of this case.
The willful ignorance, indifference & complete failure to examine their own shortcomings demonstrated by the general population of the city is nothing short of disturbing.
Heidi had clearly not been coping with the burden of Alices' care for a long time; yet both her family members & the wider community chose to turn a blind eye.
It appears that Eton, Ohio doesn't actually mind the existence of human suffering at all.....
...until & unless they have to be confronted with the reality of it, of course.
What's out of sight truly is out of mind...... and if the unseen house of cards collapses, then it can always be someone elses' fault..... right?!!
Very well said. Some things, others cannot understand, because they've never been forced to experience them. I would have to say, that it was not the 'entirety' of the city of Eaton....it is likely more to the fact that those who do understand, are keeping their thoughts and feelings to themselves. I feel very sorry for Heidi, and her Grandmother. It shouldn't have come to this, but there were a lot of contributing factors to consider. I certainly do not want to point a finger at her, ir throw her under the bus. I'll just say a prayer for her, and her Grandma.
This was so well said. I agree entirely.
I appreciate her honesty and sympathise with the situation and responsibility that was on her shoulders alone. It's a tragic ending for both women. Mental illness is hard on anyone, even worse so with the care given to an elderly person 24/7. 💔💔😢😢
I have subscribed to multiple crime channels and I've NEVER had any ounce of sympathy for a killer. That changed today after watching this video. Poor Heidi😭. May Alice Matheny rest in eternal peace, she was cruelly taken away by her mentally ill granddaughter
It really wasn’t cruel at all though. She did it out of frustration, hopelessness and empathy.
@@dewilew2137 water filling up your lungs is a cruel way to die.
@@MenwithPurpose2012 All manners of death are “cruel”. Most people don’t die peacefully in their sleep.
@@dewilew2137 Agreed. Have a good day.
This is the first time I find sympathy and understanding for the murderer. I don’t think she is evil-just broken down and overwhelmed. I hope she is shown leniency and compassion 8:04
Millions of people around the world care for their elders until they are in the grave no matter how bad their health/‘mental health gets… many of those people also are much worse off then this lady. She deserves no compassion or leniency for killing a defencelessness old woman who’s on deaths door
This sadly was a mercy killing. This woman knew she couldn’t let the suffering continue and that it would cost her own life. She looked completely defeated and resigned to her fate. Terrible situation.
… No. The grandmother never told her granddaughter she wanted to die. That’s ludicrous.
@@katelynholmes9504exactly! People making excuses for this is ludicrous
@@katelynholmes9504 she wasn’t capable of doing that, sadly.
@@sigh-ruh you’re right. A sick child might have something to look forward to. I’m not excusing this woman. I’m saying I understand.
@@cougar2013I don't. Human life is sacred and it is not ours to take away. Only God* should do that. However on a human level I get that you could be so worn out, depressed and traumatised by caregiving that you could see a 'mercy killing' as a way out. So sad all round.
The prosecutor said that she never explained consistently why she did it when in fact, she was consistent with her explanation from the beginning
They should have made her get an attorney as soon as she showed up saying she felt like she "put the dog down". Clearly, she was having a mental breakdown and the last thing she should be doing is rambling to the police. She had long-term trauma and mental issues way before she did the unthinkable and having her recall what she did repeatedly is absolutely detrimental to everything that was unfolding.
Yea, that interrogation was hard to stomach. Both of them.
But.. that's Umerica for you
My grandmother asked me more than once to come put a bag over her head if they ever tried to take her out of her house to put her into a nursing home. I could understand her fears but of course I could never. She lived to be 97.
My mother said should the day come she had to go to a home she was going to figure out a way to take herself out rather than live in one of those places.
@@CazM I feel the same way. I don't want to be a burden on my children either.
I’m not gonna put that burden on anyone I love but I am gonna take my death into my own hands, if I’m ever at the point of deteriorating beyond return I am going to take a bunch of benzos and fall asleep in the bath.
@@redlamina5937I’m so relieved to hear that I’m not the only person who think ls about this. It’s such a relief to know that that option is always there. As strange as that sounds.
@@dewilew2137 I think about it all the time. I'm almost 60 and my parents are over 80. I worked in long term and memory care for years. I know how hard it can be if you don't have a ton of money.
It is rare that I listen to the first 10 mins of a murder doc and conclude that the murderer is also a victim 😢. To be expected to care for the elderly when you already have some problems of your own is unfair and having seen the toll it can take on a person, I fully understand her actions...
I feel so bad for Heidi. If she had any support from the family, this would probably never happened. The family gets to live guilt-free and place all blame on Heidi, when their inaction was a driving force in this killing. The poor victim had one person left that cared, and tragically, led to her tragic demise.
Crazy! I live about 20 miles from eaton and never heard about this! Thanks DD❤much ❤!
Caring for my grandma while she went thru dementia nearly broke my sister and I. Such a hard task to take, care people need help. So much help.
Being a caregiver is extremely difficult. It's draining physically, mentally, and emotionally. Add that on top of mental illness, and my heart breaks for this family.
Why is it being a mercy killing so hard to believe?
If we believe and try to excuse mercy killings, then we might as well excuse honour killings and every other killing, murder is murder, there’s no mercy in drowning your grandma because you’re tired wth
Oh, I certainly don’t mean to suggest we “excuse” mercy killings. I’m just saying that the motive being what she claimed isn’t an irrational conclusion. While I’d definitely say it played a part, her punishment should absolutely be the same. Forcibly “euthanizing” someone out of compassion is still murder.
I understand this. No help from family. No help from society. No affordable options. No end in sight. So sad for all.
My heart is broken for Heidi because she put all her efforts and energy into taking care of the grandmother and neglected her own mental and physical health. I’ve seen this happen to many people unfortunately 😢
I really like the respect you show for the victims and their family, a rare thing these days - thank you, you have a new sub
I was left to take care of my dad by myself while I was still in high school. I actually had to start taking care of him when I was 10 but I wasn't by myself at the time. I had to quit school several times because he would be in the hospital and I would go there and spend the day with him and then when he would get out of the hospital I would stay home and take care of him. I eventually dropped out of high school just to take care of him. My family kept saying they were going to help me but they were busy with their own lives. I finally moved out and left my dad alone because I knew that was the only way they would pitch in and help. I never thought about killing him though.
This woman is sincerely struggling with significant mental health challenges and is in desperate need of genuine support. The over whelming stress she had been enduring has led to a severe breakdown, resulting in this horrible tragedy. It is disheartening to see how the legal system often fails to recognize the true extent of someone's mental health struggles. Deeming others incompetent when they are exaggerating or feigning their condition, while disregarding those who genuinely require assistance. The story she shared about the dog serves as a powerful indication of the persistent torment she had been enduring. This entire situation is truly heart-wrenching.
It's devastating. I feel sorry for the killer for being at her wit's end. She looks terribly sad, the corners of her mouth was down the whole time and defeat written all over her face. She should have spoken to someone about being in this state but she kept it all to herself until she snapped.
I related to her so much. I was the sole caregiver for my 80 year old mother with dementia, while my sibling, who lived 100's of miles away, had power of attorney and made life harder for her and I, and it makes a person think thoughts they never believed they would. Mom's insurance would have paid for assisted living, but my sibling refused to let her go in. My mom said she didn't want to be on earth anymore over and over again. It broke my heart to see her mind break from reality and the terror she experienced because of it. I thought about ending her suffering more than once, but I could never bring myself to do it.
It's never easy to care for an elderly love one. I know, I was a caregiver for my elderly mother for one year who is 89 years old.It's extremely stressful. But, it doesn't give anyone the right to murder the elderly, just because you cannot handle them. Seeking help is the only solution for the stressful outcome for the caregiver. I feel bad for grandma, it wasn't her fault, that she couldn't take care of herself anymore, and she had to pay the price for it. May grandma Rest In Peace.
I feel sorry for both grandma and granddaughter. Both of them needed help
What a heartbreaking story. I don't even know what to say really. I feel for the grand daughter, but I really wish she could've found resources for her grandma. Is there no caregivers that go to homes for seniors? I live in Canada and seniors that don't want to or aren't ready to go into a care home can get home care. My neighbour has care workers that come twice a day. Our medical system pays for it for low income seniors. Is there nothing like that in America? Poor woman may be at peace in a wonderful afterlife, but I'm sure she would've liked to have gone out on her time, not being murdered. On the other side of the coin, the Grand daughter must've also been going through some serious mental dilemmas and must've thought jail would been better than being with grandma. Very sad indeed. 😢
I feel for her, she had a lot of stress and things that her mind was filled with. She at the time knew she didn’t have a choice…this is how she felt.
If we had universal healthcare, this probably wouldn't have happened. The granddaughter would have been able to access mental healthcare she clearly needed. And her grandmother could go to a nursing home, like she wanted.
This is tragic. The hardest thing I’ve ever done was to sit and listen to my 93 yo grandmother complain when I could do nothing and live with her, helping with everything. Nobody will help, there are no breaks. Unless you e done it, you would never understand how mentally and physically exhausting it is. I feel so bad for this lady.
I think its cool ya'll give condolences for the victim and their family before you start your stories. True crime has become kind of cold and tone deaf.
Because there's too many cooks. I noticed everyone now does True Crime because the one case or another they just all the sudden change their format and become this lame True Crime Channel this is a good Channel but literally 90% of the other ones are just garbage
@@andrewbochicchio2232 This channel is 95 percent EWU, very similar narration style, content presentation, etc. Not a bad thing btw.
Agreed!
It's got nothing to do with singing, so whos tone deaf??
It's why I consistently come back to this channel - thorough back story, great analysis and commentary. But, also showing respect to the victims that too often get lost in the sauce of all the attention paid to the criminal mind.
This is absolutely heartbreaking all the way around.
Oh wow I'm SO glad a lot of people feel the same way I do and have understanding for Heidi. I don't see why the system can't just accept the reasons why Heidi did this. I feel she was being honest. After all she went to the police immediately after killing her grandmother and didn't show any signs of trying to hide anything. Mental health obviously affected Heidi and its sad the judge didn't agree with this. This woman needed to spend time in a mental health facility instead of prison. Of course she was wrong killing her grandmother but things are not always black and white.
I love how they acknowledge the deceased in the beginning! That's class!
The sons should have sold the house for what money they could get and put her in a home. So sad she lived that long and her life ends like this…
I took care of my mom for 10yrs. Finally putting her in nursing home…she eventually came back home but passed away 3 days later. Dying just like she wanted. Asleep in her bed at my house.
I feel bad for Heidi. I stayed with my mother for the last 7 months of her life. She had dementia and it was not easy being with her 24/7. However, i did have the support of my older sister. (She was not in good health herself, so not able to do any lifting or care that was needed by my mom.) We could not afford a nursing home, but Mom was adamantly against going to one. Hospice home health was a great support to us.
The most honest interview I've ever seen ❤ i hope she gets the help she needs.
RIP Granny ❤
I don't understand why it seems to be so difficult not to accept the motivation surrounding the circumstances: I think she was perfectly able to communicate her reasoning behind the murder. I'm happy she got quite a light sentence, considering her mental health issues and good chances of getting better with some professional help and less outward stressors in life.
I liked the interviewers style, his confirmation that he got it, after questions helped move this story along and it didn't feel judgemental.
The U.S. should be ashamed of how they ignore the needs of the elderly and those who cannot afford decent healthcare and nursing home coverage. My family paid $8000 a month for my father who had dementia to be in a nursing home. The nurses and CNA's do NOT get paid enough to work in a nursing home so the nursing homes often lack good medical care.
It seems that way, but think of how it was before there was such a thing as social security. I think LBJ pushed that into being-- so that was really not too long ago. I'm sure there was widespread unhappiness with poor families taking in poor elderly dependents, and probably some suicides among old people.
Super important to reach out to caregivers. Offer help. I don't think they even know when they are overwhelmed and feeling hopeless. 😔 I hate our system so much! 🤬
As a caretaker if you don't have help with the elderly person or disabled person that you care for it can be VERY DIFFICULT to deal with the stress that comes with it.
It is NOT easy watching your loved one wither away day by day. Then add to that extra problems with relatives who don't help but take advantage of grandparents when they get that way is VERY STRESSFUL.
Add to that someone's mental health problems and you have a recipe for DISASTER.
No, I get it... I have ADHD and am the carer of my brother who has ASD, I've always said if something happened to me and I knew I was dying I might do something to him so he doesn't have to deal with the emotional dysregulation losing another person would inflict upon him. In the years since saying that I have made connections and have a plan in place so he has support but if I didn't have that support network or the government funding I could have definitely pre-planned something bad to prevent his distress. I completely understand her reasoning and don't think the people who are stating she needed a 'reason' are correct. Being a carer is HARD, being a carer with a disability yourself is VERY difficult.
In fact, a little over a decade ago when my mum was still his carer, she was severely depressed, our whole household was, and she contemplated driving off the side of the road with my brother so that she wouldn't be suffering anymore and that he wouldn't have to deal with the fallout and anxiety that would come from a parent doing that. We moved and got help and things are a lot better, but it emphasizes how HARD being a carer is. Don't dismiss 'I just wanted her suffering to end'. It's valid, not saying she should have gotten a shorter sentence or that she was innocent, simply that I understand and empathize.
I feel bad for some people who feel they can't confront toxic people and detach from them... I pride myself in never being stuck in a situation like this or a bad relationship or over bearing parents... Life is too short to slave for other people
I don't have a strong bond with a majority of my family (a couple I'm completely no contact with) because it's filled to the brim with narcissism and enabling. It's like a f*cking cult😬 I go to therapy and take my meds. With all the money I spend on both and the growth I've realized, I'll be damned if I let those mfs bring me back into the abyss!
Its not to "slave for other people" , to help your closest family. And exuse ne , "toxic people" , is that what you call a confused suck old grandma??
Your parents didnt look at it as "slave for you" when you grew up either.
Im all for enhoying life, but it is quite possible to do that, without being cold and selfish all the time.
I wouldnt enjoy my life,knowing that a close one suffered and needed my help,thats for sure. Life its to short for that kind of selfishness.
Although I did not kill my grandmother, she died completely on her own, I have to say that I understand why a granddaughter might want to put an end to her grandmothers life.
Not all grandmas are cute and sweet. Some are actually the devil incarnate.
Oh lol... you may eat those words one day...
You're tempting Karma right there with your so called "pride".
This may not age well.
You come across as very self centered. Heidi loved her grandma. It's not her fault Alice's son next door also selfish and unaware letting his daughter run in and out messing up the place. The son never offering to help.
Heidi has her own mental health problems. She heard problems with out solutions daily and probably snapped.
I bet If an older relative needed help you wouldn't help.
This is the only video that I haven’t been able to finish. It’s so disturbing because this woman is NOT a killer. This was a desperate woman at the end of her mental rope. There’s no excuse for her actions, but what a tragedy for everyone.
What I find remarkable, is if an individual ends a life, it's called murder or manslaughter, but if an hospital provides a woeful lack of care, that results in a grotesque snapped leg and head strike (in less than 4 hours after being admitted to ward) that effectively ends the quality of life of a patient, it's apparently ok. This happened to my 71 y/o mom. Then she was thrown into a nursing home, after previously living in her own home.
Health/senior care will never be affordable as long as it's for-profit. The corporations that run things are never satisfied with a reasonable profit, they always want to squeeze out more money for themselves.
Ridiculous. She should never have been charged, let alone convicted and sentenced to life in prison. The woman needed help, not imprisonment. The judge who deemed her mentally fit to stand trial is a moron.
She murdered an old woman....
She literally took somebody’s life. She doesn’t get excuses. Plenty of people are mentally ill and would never or could never carry such an abhorrent act. This is such a disgusting thing to say. She is not the victim in this case.
I'm impressed... A moderate opinion ... This is an unexpected comment for this platform. It's usually all pitchforks and torches....
Are we going to judge things on how we feel about the person? It's good to take mitigating circumstances into consideration, but the crime itself must be punished. Who is to say there won't be copycats who use this to get away with murder. We get your situation but you did wrong is the message to send.
I agree. She should have been submitted to a mental health facility, NOT prison.
This was no cold-hearted killer, but a worn-out, despairing woman with her own problems to face. Society just dumped it all on her, and situation would have been entirely different if care for the elderly had been within her financial range.
I don't understand how anyone could hurt elderly people, especially their own grandmother...
Coz they are evil.....that's why I love dogs.
Yeah some of these videos I watched just are infuriating. I thought that I was a criminal when I was a kid I even went to jail and missed out on High School... 25 years later I mean half the stuff that I even here like shoplifting I would never do that. I mean that's bad enough of killing people is horrible
@@andrewbochicchio2232'm glad you turned it around! 🙏
Leaded water. It's Ohio.
@materockk1579 For sure! I almost bought a Cane Corso for my mom last year. I had her move in next door to me instead, but I agree. If they are elderly and alone, they need some kind of protection. Dog, alarm, something to help them. It's such a sad thought, but it's true...
The ultimate in letting the intrusive thoughts win.
She's not a monster, she is just overwhelmed. Her actions are noted good, but I see why she broke and did what she did
As someone who helped take care of my father and then my mother as they both died from complications of mental health. They were both schizophrenic and let themselves waste away despite our best efforts. It RUINED my Mom's mental health watching Dad go thru that and then she put herself thru it! It's maddening when Mom is doing everything she used to yell at or get mad at my Dad for doing. It seriously messed me and my family up as well.
This is heart breaking