I don't think there's much anyone on UA-cam could say that could truly, deeply affect your mindset and how you feel. Solely because a screen is just insanely hard to reach through (metaphorically lol). Though it's already an extremely good sign that you're so open about your problems, that honesty is a gift of courage more people need nowadays, thank you. I've also personally been dealing with addiction for about 6 years now (substance related) and one of the biggest influences with my recovery has been my (first) job that required me to leave the house and interact with people vastly different than myself (literally just fast food). It's been hard seeing other people so effortlessly succeed where I've failed for years but reminding myself how incredibly different every single person is, and how different our journeys are has really given me strength to fight for what I want my life to be rather than what I've expected it to become for a while now. It also helps to remember that life is very much not linear, and down times where you feel like you're losing progress is just inevitable, but in the same way, if you continue living long enough its almost impossible for it to just continue downwards forever. I saying that gets me through some of the worst of times is "there are more than 8 billion ways to live a good life" (referencing the ~8 billion people alive today). I know things will get better for you as long as you stick it through the hardest of times. :p
Yo, thanks for sharing and good job being honest with yourself fr. How you feel is valid and you talk about issues that are very real for a lot of people. Yet I’d say it mostly goes unnoticed by others or even themselves sometimes. Good on you for not locking yourself out of introspection. It can be tough not to obsess about the obsessions, events, etc as well huh? I think self-reflection is hard until your recollection doesn’t hurt, but it’s also the only path to accept and love oneself. As a bonus I think it’s also a big part of how humanity evolves. Avoiding it leaves to narcissism masking up pain. Also, LOL @ the end 😂
hey man this is the first video of yours im seeing but im rooting for you brother. i also have struggled with this same exact issue of being obsessed with someone more along the lines of what they represent rather than who they are, and it fucking sucks so bad to even attempt to navigate especially when you're in the 'midst' of it. good luck i hope this period pans out as smooth as it can and onyx takes a chill pill
Hey man im so sorry you been struggling but i promise its gonna be okay and this dip will NOT be forever You got out of that time where it was bad 8 years years ago and you CAN and WILL get fully better again This feeling is awful but youre doing the best you can and its okay If u need to rot in bed for a while, if u need to go through the motions and feel the same way and feel bad then let yourself feel that way and face those feelings head on so you can feel better Let yourself grieve and let yourself grieve in any way you want, its gonna be okay brother Love to you
one woman isn't worth it. Been around a lot of death myself and loss to the point where u just got to go your own way, f people and f what people think and say.
I watched the whole thing and still have no idea what you’re on about. Get out of your head man, get outside start taking care of the body and the mind will follow
I don't think I'll ever will. The only way that would happen is a long conversation with them. I don't want to contact them at all cuz I see that as a relapse. Sometimes in life there is no closure and That's ok.
I don't know you, obviously but for some reason this came across my feed and I watched it. The onyx personality you talk about is your way of not taking accountability. You can chalk it up to whatever you want but it's what a lot of people use, serial killers included, who don't want to take accountability for doing things that they know should not be done. They claim that it's out of their control and list a million triggers that are going to make them go out of control and let this person take over. It's just you avoiding accountability bro. The worst part about it is that it gives you a feeling of power when you're feeling powerless. You can easily end up flexing that power and then end up in prison and they don't give a shit about your triggers or your closure or anything else there. The only thing that matters in prison is that you're held accountable in the most serious and worst way possible. I'm going to tell you something about women that I don't think anyone has told you. First off, if a woman wants to be with you or hear from you or anything else she will make it easy for you to do just that. She will go out of her way to be available. Those are the only women you should ever give your time of day. Otherwise, you're going to be trying to prove yourself to someone who could care less. Next, even if you have a girlfriend or a wife, she is not yours it's just your turn. Remember that and ingrain it into your brain. Women leave. That's what they do. And when they do that, you must see it as a natural course of events and a new bevy of opportunities for yourself. Next, you will never get closure with a woman regarding a relationship. The reason that nobody ever really gets closure is because they have an idea of what that closure is in their mind. You already have closure. You haven't seen this person physically in 8 years. They want nothing to do with you. They don't like you. They don't want to be around you. If that's not closure enough for you, you're fucked. Because you will never get anything more. People come and go in your life. That's how it's going to happen. Even with family. Finally, you need to take care of this issue with psychological help at least two times a week, and until you do, Don't even think of trying to approach women or start a relationship. Once this is over, never ever bring it up again to anyone. It will be used against you. I promise you that. If you have any money, get yourself a personal trainer and take care of yourself. Nobody is going to respect you until you do. Again, and I want to emphasize this, don't waste your time trying to impress women and chase them down. The woman you want in your life is the one who makes it obvious that she wants to be there. If that's not happening to you, then work on yourself. If it never happens, so be it. But don't waste your life pining over women who don't exist.
@@NobodyCares6996 @NobodyCares6996 1st I'm not reading all that after you saying I'm not taking accountability. That's 10000% false and your hostility is so weird bro. what power are you talking about? Prison? for what. finding validation for the attention she gave me back then. I didn't even go into what happened back then so your hostile guest is so unwelcomed. For a user with the name "no one cares" you seem you care a lot to write several angry paragraphs to someone that is grieving and striving to be better. maybe do the same.
You are trying to fill a void that exists in all humans. You are making up stories of things to obssess about by reacting to your thoughts cause you dont want to admit that you are just making things up and are alone and lonely. You make up characters to the voices in your head you assign these voices too emotions. You need to understand that no one has ever given you an emotion. You meet a person you feel someway, they are not giving you an emotion you are making the emotion up yourself. If you think the person if giving you an emotion you will assign them that feeling and not allow yourself to feel that feeling when they are not there. Then you will feel the feeling you assign them when they are gone and you will then say this emotion is coming from my want for this person. That's not happening at all you are making the emotion yourself and then not letting yourself feel it because you made up that they were giving you the feeling. All emotions are being created by you, the person cant make you feel the way they made you feel you are chasing a memory that you gave the emotion too. This is what happens Have void inside of self Leave self to explore others Find interest, feel new emotions assign the good emotions to love interest Attach to person Detach from person, Assign all the emotion you felt towards that person to them and stop letting yourself feel them because those feelings are 'them' and they arent there anymore Now you are the same person you were before meeting them but you lost all the good emotions you assigned to them You still have the original void too so now you are -Negative good emotions and the void still remains. Now you go to your grandmother and she is giving you other good emotions These emotions your grandmother is giving you are also being created by you and every good emotion you ever felt from her was too She dies Now you are negative all those emotions you assigned to your grandmother because you gave them to her Now you go back to your love interest and see all those emotions you arent letting yourself feel because you assigned them to her And then you go back to the void feeling inside of yourself Now you are net negative all positive emotions and only have a void to spew in The way out is to take back all the emotions you assigned to the people and let yourself feel them even when they are not there. You created them, they are only the stimulus you used to allow yourself to feel the emotion you created. Its like desperately wanting to feel away but you cuck yourself for no reason. See that this is madness.
what you describe is like the "displacement" I think I've mentioned in the video. "it's not her it's what she represents" it's weird. thank you for your advice.
@RealMarineman it is a fractured conciousness. You fracture parts of yourself and assign them to others. But no one has ever given you an emotion. You can do shadow work to heal. You just sit there and think about why you are sad and angry and let your body feel the emotions and cry. While keeping in mind that these feelings and people aren't making you feel these they can't do that these are emotions of your soul and belong to you and you want then back so you can be whole again. You wont have to look out there to feel complete anymore. Np good luck.
@@ClanT4nkGamingOfficial No? I'd have to disagree. My issue is that my obsession problem has been triggered and the urge to contact my obsession has increased immensely. This video never mentions any issue with being terminally online.
![Lp. Сердце Вселенной #60 РОЖДЕНИЕ ЛОЛОЛОШКИ [Финал] • Майнкрафт](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/YoR0pAV9FVQ/mqdefault.jpg)
I'm sorry for your loss brother. Thank you for sharing your story. Your openness gives me the courage to be more authentic.
I don't think there's much anyone on UA-cam could say that could truly, deeply affect your mindset and how you feel. Solely because a screen is just insanely hard to reach through (metaphorically lol). Though it's already an extremely good sign that you're so open about your problems, that honesty is a gift of courage more people need nowadays, thank you. I've also personally been dealing with addiction for about 6 years now (substance related) and one of the biggest influences with my recovery has been my (first) job that required me to leave the house and interact with people vastly different than myself (literally just fast food). It's been hard seeing other people so effortlessly succeed where I've failed for years but reminding myself how incredibly different every single person is, and how different our journeys are has really given me strength to fight for what I want my life to be rather than what I've expected it to become for a while now. It also helps to remember that life is very much not linear, and down times where you feel like you're losing progress is just inevitable, but in the same way, if you continue living long enough its almost impossible for it to just continue downwards forever. I saying that gets me through some of the worst of times is "there are more than 8 billion ways to live a good life" (referencing the ~8 billion people alive today). I know things will get better for you as long as you stick it through the hardest of times. :p
thank you!
Yo, thanks for sharing and good job being honest with yourself fr. How you feel is valid and you talk about issues that are very real for a lot of people. Yet I’d say it mostly goes unnoticed by others or even themselves sometimes. Good on you for not locking yourself out of introspection. It can be tough not to obsess about the obsessions, events, etc as well huh? I think self-reflection is hard until your recollection doesn’t hurt, but it’s also the only path to accept and love oneself. As a bonus I think it’s also a big part of how humanity evolves. Avoiding it leaves to narcissism masking up pain.
Also, LOL @ the end 😂
@@melongarb thanks for the kind words!
hey man this is the first video of yours im seeing but im rooting for you brother. i also have struggled with this same exact issue of being obsessed with someone more along the lines of what they represent rather than who they are, and it fucking sucks so bad to even attempt to navigate especially when you're in the 'midst' of it. good luck i hope this period pans out as smooth as it can and onyx takes a chill pill
Hey man im so sorry you been struggling but i promise its gonna be okay and this dip will NOT be forever
You got out of that time where it was bad 8 years years ago and you CAN and WILL get fully better again
This feeling is awful but youre doing the best you can and its okay
If u need to rot in bed for a while, if u need to go through the motions and feel the same way and feel bad then let yourself feel that way and face those feelings head on so you can feel better
Let yourself grieve and let yourself grieve in any way you want, its gonna be okay brother
Love to you
one woman isn't worth it. Been around a lot of death myself and loss to the point where u just got to go your own way, f people and f what people think and say.
Well well well...
this is the second time you commented this on 2 serious videos. what's your point?
@@RealMarineman I think he's calling you a ni-
(Btw, don't pay attention to the random ass memer)
Are you getting therapy atm?
@@RealMarineman btw, don't pay attention to it.. What the hell does this person's random ass racial meme comment matter?
I watched the whole thing and still have no idea what you’re on about. Get out of your head man, get outside start taking care of the body and the mind will follow
Hopefully you can find your clousue
I don't think I'll ever will. The only way that would happen is a long conversation with them. I don't want to contact them at all cuz I see that as a relapse. Sometimes in life there is no closure and That's ok.
@@RealMarineman The disrespect was the closure.
@@JohnnySideburnsX mayhap.
I don't know you, obviously but for some reason this came across my feed and I watched it. The onyx personality you talk about is your way of not taking accountability. You can chalk it up to whatever you want but it's what a lot of people use, serial killers included, who don't want to take accountability for doing things that they know should not be done. They claim that it's out of their control and list a million triggers that are going to make them go out of control and let this person take over. It's just you avoiding accountability bro. The worst part about it is that it gives you a feeling of power when you're feeling powerless. You can easily end up flexing that power and then end up in prison and they don't give a shit about your triggers or your closure or anything else there. The only thing that matters in prison is that you're held accountable in the most serious and worst way possible.
I'm going to tell you something about women that I don't think anyone has told you. First off, if a woman wants to be with you or hear from you or anything else she will make it easy for you to do just that. She will go out of her way to be available. Those are the only women you should ever give your time of day. Otherwise, you're going to be trying to prove yourself to someone who could care less. Next, even if you have a girlfriend or a wife, she is not yours it's just your turn. Remember that and ingrain it into your brain. Women leave. That's what they do. And when they do that, you must see it as a natural course of events and a new bevy of opportunities for yourself. Next, you will never get closure with a woman regarding a relationship. The reason that nobody ever really gets closure is because they have an idea of what that closure is in their mind. You already have closure. You haven't seen this person physically in 8 years. They want nothing to do with you. They don't like you. They don't want to be around you. If that's not closure enough for you, you're fucked. Because you will never get anything more. People come and go in your life. That's how it's going to happen. Even with family.
Finally, you need to take care of this issue with psychological help at least two times a week, and until you do, Don't even think of trying to approach women or start a relationship. Once this is over, never ever bring it up again to anyone. It will be used against you. I promise you that.
If you have any money, get yourself a personal trainer and take care of yourself. Nobody is going to respect you until you do.
Again, and I want to emphasize this, don't waste your time trying to impress women and chase them down. The woman you want in your life is the one who makes it obvious that she wants to be there. If that's not happening to you, then work on yourself. If it never happens, so be it. But don't waste your life pining over women who don't exist.
@@NobodyCares6996 @NobodyCares6996 1st I'm not reading all that after you saying I'm not taking accountability. That's 10000% false and your hostility is so weird bro. what power are you talking about? Prison? for what. finding validation for the attention she gave me back then. I didn't even go into what happened back then so your hostile guest is so unwelcomed. For a user with the name "no one cares" you seem you care a lot to write several angry paragraphs to someone that is grieving and striving to be better.
maybe do the same.
You are trying to fill a void that exists in all humans. You are making up stories of things to obssess about by reacting to your thoughts cause you dont want to admit that you are just making things up and are alone and lonely. You make up characters to the voices in your head you assign these voices too emotions.
You need to understand that no one has ever given you an emotion. You meet a person you feel someway, they are not giving you an emotion you are making the emotion up yourself. If you think the person if giving you an emotion you will assign them that feeling and not allow yourself to feel that feeling when they are not there.
Then you will feel the feeling you assign them when they are gone and you will then say this emotion is coming from my want for this person. That's not happening at all you are making the emotion yourself and then not letting yourself feel it because you made up that they were giving you the feeling.
All emotions are being created by you, the person cant make you feel the way they made you feel you are chasing a memory that you gave the emotion too.
This is what happens
Have void inside of self
Leave self to explore others
Find interest, feel new emotions assign the good emotions to love interest
Attach to person
Detach from person, Assign all the emotion you felt towards that person to them and stop letting yourself feel them because those feelings are 'them' and they arent there anymore
Now you are the same person you were before meeting them but you lost all the good emotions you assigned to them
You still have the original void too so now you are -Negative good emotions and the void still remains.
Now you go to your grandmother and she is giving you other good emotions
These emotions your grandmother is giving you are also being created by you and every good emotion you ever felt from her was too
She dies
Now you are negative all those emotions you assigned to your grandmother because you gave them to her
Now you go back to your love interest and see all those emotions you arent letting yourself feel because you assigned them to her
And then you go back to the void feeling inside of yourself
Now you are net negative all positive emotions and only have a void to spew in
The way out is to take back all the emotions you assigned to the people and let yourself feel them even when they are not there. You created them, they are only the stimulus you used to allow yourself to feel the emotion you created. Its like desperately wanting to feel away but you cuck yourself for no reason. See that this is madness.
what you describe is like the "displacement" I think I've mentioned in the video. "it's not her it's what she represents" it's weird. thank you for your advice.
@RealMarineman it is a fractured conciousness. You fracture parts of yourself and assign them to others. But no one has ever given you an emotion.
You can do shadow work to heal. You just sit there and think about why you are sad and angry and let your body feel the emotions and cry. While keeping in mind that these feelings and people aren't making you feel these they can't do that these are emotions of your soul and belong to you and you want then back so you can be whole again. You wont have to look out there to feel complete anymore.
Np good luck.
You need to fast from your computer, That's why you're depressed your life is online.
@@ClanT4nkGamingOfficial No? I'd have to disagree. My issue is that my obsession problem has been triggered and the urge to contact my obsession has increased immensely. This video never mentions any issue with being terminally online.