Opposite Sex Friends While in a Relationship- Bad Idea?
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- Опубліковано 27 лип 2022
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“Play stupid games get stupid prizes “ I know that’s right!
I'm gonna start using this one!!
Pride keeps us from admitting that we are not vulnerable to temptation.
If they are truly your friends then they will respect your relationship, a real friend knows how to operate once you have found yourself in a committed relationship and will not cross any boundaries that comes with it.
I 💯 agree with you! It’s also dangerous for them to have the opposite sex friendship while in a relationship, it’s an open door for the enemy to bring all kinds of temptation. Your partner also start to compare you and his female friend. Sooo it brings all the confusion and division in the relationship. I appreciate you for posting this video. People need to seek wisdom on this. 🙏
Agree
I'm not down with friends of the opposite sex. Too many variables for me.
And everything you’re saying is facts! I’ve experienced all of that. Which is why I don’t agree with the opposite friendship, whether it’s “best friend” or “Platonic.” Run if you meet someone who has these red flags. Lol
No. Here's how I see it, what is a friend? It's someone you can trust, rely on, a person who knows you well, they care about you, you feel safe to share personal matters or secrets with them, you enjoy their company, and you like the person they are on the inside. Doesn't this sound like a spouse? What's the difference between a relationship with your opposite sex friend and your spouse? You aren't intimate with them! And all it will take is a moment of weakness and a shoulder to cry on to cross that line. Why do you think so many people cheat with 'just a friend' or ' just someone I work with' or 'friend from school' where 'one thing just led to another'. It's rarely a stranger and always someone they felt comfortable with. Remember, your spouse was once your friend too but now look where you are at. It's simple, avoid opposite sex friends and respect your relationship.
FACTSSSS
I have never been about friends of the opposite sex especially in a marriage. I have two male best friends since childhood but they are married and barely speak with them and if I do I always ask about their wife before I even ask about them. Our lives back in the day can never be replaced but now they are in marriages to do Gods work with their wives & children. I refuse to be a hindrance to that.
Very mature of you to understand their transition from being your single guy best friends to now being married with family…Some people feel the need to get territorial and claiming they’ve known the person first, blah blah…But truth is, it’s about respect, if a person gets territorial in that aspect they need to get cut off ASAP!
Again, I applaud you. God bless you 💕
Much respect 💯 To sum up what you said it’s about showing honor. People don’t know how to honor other people’s relationship now a days.
"i have never been about opposite sex friends" "i have two male best friends but..."
@@ashanti952 your level of understanding shows in this comment bc you took out what you wanted to take out. Carry on!
@@sunnyhunn9315 absolutely. I will always love them but I understand they were not put here for me but for God and their families. I’m now divorced bc my ex couldn’t understand boundaries with his “friends however I refuse to lean on them for emotional support. That’s what my therapist is for
I’ve always felt that as Christians we should show love and be friendly with everyone just like Jesus, but there’s a difference between being friendly and being a friend. A friend is someone you have on your inner circle and you share struggles with them, you pour into them and they pour into you. Men need brothers and women need sisters to help each other in trails and push each other toward Christ. Men and women can and should be loving and friendly as brothers and sisters in Christ but we should save getting close to someone for the person we are actually interested in otherwise things can get confused and feelings hurt. In short if I’ve got a woman then as far as I’m concerned I don’t need to be talking to any other woman in the world, she’s enough for me. What can a female friend be if it me that my woman can’t? If I want to get closer then an acquaintance with a woman then that shows me I need to check my heart. Same goes for women, if you got a man then he should be your best friend and confidant. Other men should be viewed as brothers in Christ and acquaintances. When we go to bed at night we all lock our front doors right? It’s not to trap us inside like a prison but rather to have that boundary there to stop the wrong people from coming in and taking what doesn’t belong to them. If you give someone your heart and they give you theirs then both of you should put boundaries in place to protect what was trusted to you. 🙏❤️ that’s my two cents, Godbless y’all 🤙
Great video. Boundaries are everything! I’ve dealt with my ex having female friends who I never met, and as a result, they thought that they were entitled to taking up all his time etc because he never put his foot down. So important to set the boundaries early on. It is very dangerous having friends of the opposite sex if we are not both friends with that person.
I can relate! The first thing that’s said is “ you’re insecure”.
very true and even if you both are friends it's dangerous
Sometimes it's not only the friend that's staying around because they have ulterior motives, it may be the person in the relationship that's keeping the friend around because they have a secret attraction (physical or emotional) to the friend. Sometimes this may even be mutual on both sides, sadly.
They may even say to their partner that they are only friends and claim there's nothing going on, but just like you said, there is emotional intimacy. This can lead to emotional cheating, which can lead to physical cheating. All of it is bad no matter how you look at it.
The best person to be emotionally intimate with and confide in is your partner. If you can't do that, then maybe you should examine your relationship.
I also agree with you that it's never a good idea to talk badly about your partner to a friend or anyone else. It doesn't matter if you knew them longer than your partner. If you have a disagreement with your partner, talk to your partner about it and sort it out amongst yourselves. It's the two of you that are in this together, not the two of you and your friend.
Thanks for the video. You have a great way of explaining things that really causes us to examine ourselves.
If you’re married your spouse should be your best friend. Ion care! Ion care!
Lol right
At this point in life. I don’t really care to have a best friend of the opposite sex. I don’t want to wait around to see if there are any motives. Or hidden agendas! I just rather not. I’m not oppose to me & my husband making friends! With other married couples & growing a bond! I have done the opposite sex friend thing already. Things still get sticky sometimes! Even with boundaries in place!🤦🏼♀️🥴
Nahhh, I’m not a fan of having opposite sex friends while in a relationship, ESPECIALLY in a marriage! A married person with a friend of the opposite sex?? 🙅🏾♀️ I believe a husband’s/wife’s (best) friend should be their spouse not someone of the opposite sex. When it comes to a non-marriage relationship, I’m somewhat lenient, but not too much. Overall, I just don’t like that idea.
Women need to be able to step back and let the wife be his wife. You can no longer have late night convos Or cook him meals etc. CUT IT OUT! And men need to be aware and stop being gullible to these behaviors especially if that women is single!
👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼!
Thank you!👏🏾
My rule is. We both have to be friends with that person(mutual) and have boundaries.
Good morning brother in Christ. I would not personally because, I feel as though that's a waste of time. If I'm friends with a female it will be for dating going into marriage not just to have one. Even once I get into a relationship if I get into one I wouldn't have a friend of the opposite sex because like you about the serpent, he's ready to tempt someone. If I'm friends with a female it's because I'm already friends with the guy
I really enjoyed this episode, it's something I actually asked my Pastors about - if it's ok to have friends of the opposite sex while in a relationship/married. I myself have 2 male friends who I've known for over a decade never dated either one of them, strictly friends. All 3 of us were close friends because we used to work together. These are friends I want to have for a lifetime , so I wondered am I going to have to get rid of my friends when I get into a relationship? But after seeking some Godly counseling and listening to this podcast, I learned I can still keep these friendships as long as I set boundaries and do group outings with my significant other and my 2 friends.
I approve of this message! You speak truth sadly I experienced this firsthand, and I felt the hurt all over again watching this video,however, I gained more peace and clarity as well! You literally said pretty much everything I said and tried to explain to him but I was made to feel like I was being insecure and was the problem. Thank you for this! God bless you!
I hope this video goes viral!
This is a very BAD IDEA! An opposite sex "friend" will become the shoulder to cry on when things hit a rough patch in the marriage and then the devil will open up all the doors to infidelity and an affair. You're playing with fire by having "friends" of the opposite sex in the confines of marriage. I don't care if this approach sounds old school or if haters try and say to me that "you're just an abusive, insecure, jealous, controlling, manipulative person for doing this. Don't you trust your wife?" You bet I do, but I also know that very rarely does a man stay "friends" with a woman who he doesn't have feelings for. And worse of all I can't help but feel those opposite sex "friends" are just waiting in the wings licking their chops for their turns just hoping your marriage will fail. So you bet I see any of these opposite sex "friends" in the confines of a marriage as a threat. I'm about to hit my 30s and still waiting for God's timing to bless me with the wife he has in store for me in His time, but I for one will be making sure I have no other friends of the opposite sex in the picture at all except her. Can't risk any temptations like this. A Christian marriage needs to be guarded/defended like your life depends on it because it literally does. And that means sacrificing existing friendships with the opposite sex so the devil can't tempt you with infidelty and having an affair. Sadly most of my millennial generation doesn't seem to understand this concept.
Great topic! Good insights.
Thanks for approaching this topic because like most everything else these days it can be considered controversial but….
If you’re in a serious relationship with long term potential (marriage) or if married this absolutely NEEDS to be considered.
This is when the past comes to the forefront. Knowing what your spouse was delivered from or are still healing from matters here particularly. There’s a saying “don’t tempt a thief” meaning, given the benefit of the doubt, perhaps a thief is trying to change their ways. However, perhaps not which in tempting them would be self-sabotaging because you’ve been robbed and can’t confront them because you set the test and they aced it.
Remember Eve let her guard down and look what happened?! . . .
Right in times of weakness, when y’all mad at each other, when y’all talking about each other problems. Nah my wife can have female godly friends and I will have male godly friends so we can build each other up
Hi everything you said in this video is so correct. I kept saying yes yes your right your so right. I also agree the person your in relationship with should be your best friend. And if you have an ex has a friend I have a problem with that and wouldn't date that guy.
Yeah true just blocked it that’s why my relationship ended with my bf.😶yeah cut the tie I say I don’t mind has long has it’s not a perv once it became perv just blocked.
This is a great topic! I have been in this situation myself before in my younger years but I didn’t make it a habit to continue. I’m kind of straddling the fence with this #GodlyDating101 and please give clarification on this. So 2 parts to this. Do you think it would a bit awkward when you’ve known a “guy/girl friend" for so long and he/she knows things about you that he/she you’re dating/married to sees displayed/heard when y’all are together but they don’t know those things? Also, do you think it’d be best to get to know people of opposite sex together to not risk having these red flags to go off?? (These questions popped up as I read comments)🙏🏽💜
If you're in a marriage/relationship, why would you need friends of the opposite sex in the first place? I agree.
@kroductionproducer Well said!
Is it good for men to date older women