SKIP TO DIFFERENT SECTIONS: 1:28 Fiona and Alan's relationship before surgery. 3:24 How sex changed after Alan's prostate cancer surgery (prostatectomy) 4:42 What it was like talking about sex after surgery 6:38 How she responded to the erectile dysfunction 8:13 What it was like using trying Viagra and injections to create erections 10:56 The challenge of intentional rather than spontaneous sex 12:54 How Fiona's sexual function changed after cancer and menopause 14:32 What helped Fiona overcome painful sex and vaginal dryness 17:17 Did her healthcare professionals talk to her about sexual side effects? 18:43 What Fiona wishes all healthcare professionals knew about sexual communication 20:41 Why they have not given up sex even though so much has changed 23:04 Fiona's recipe for keeping their sex life going in the future 26:38 What they do when penetrative sex is not an option 29:25 Navigate project: decision making tool for low risk prostate cancer
I was speechless after listening to this session yesterday (four years after it was created.) I had to wait a day before commenting. Fiona's attitude, approach, and candor was (is) simply amazing. I'm five months out from prostate surgery and found the open discussion very helpful and encouraging. Words are inadequate, nonetheless Thank You. The fact that this kind of deeply personal insight can be shared across time and distance (I'm in North Carolina USA) is wonderful and incredible.
Hi Michael, we are so moved and beyond grateful for your kind comments! We are so very pleased you found this resource valuable and insightful. We wish you all the very best for your rehabilitation.
I am so grateful for the candidness and openness in discussing this delicate issue - also for the gentle sense of pleasure and humor from Fiona ( & Alan) - Wow
Thank you for sharing this segment with me featuring Ms White - she is a treasure for sure. I see this was done 4 years ago - but remains very much applicable today, and like much revered literature, will remain viable for years to come. It seems progress in this area of sexuality moves at a snails pace, however it is this kind of information that gives hope to the sufferers.
Hi Mark, thank you very much for your comment and your kind words of appreciation. We love hearing from our community and we are so pleased you have found value in it.
Although I didn't have cancer, I did have an orchiectomy due to tumors on both testicles. Of course, as one knows there is a loss of sensations in that area after the surgery. It's been about 20 years now. Arousal is very difficult and frustrating, I can only have partial erections which do not allow for intercourse. We are now limited to a very small number of sexual activities that were previously foreplay. In our 40+ year of marriage we've never discussed sex....it just happened. We have been at a point in which we should and cant. I admire the frank discussion of trying new things and being playful. I don't have the courage to bring it up with my wife.
Hi Roadstar thanks for your comment, we can appreciate your frustrations on your journey and also around having trouble discussing this with your wife. Please know you are not alone. It could be worth exploring our Online Support Group resource for men after prostate cancer surgery: www.atouchysubject.com/blog/online-support-groups-prostate-cancer I hope this helps!
Thank you for this video! I wish this video appeared 9 years ago. My experience was the same as Alan's after surgery - flaccid penis retracted into my body and no erections. Urologist wanted to prescribe trimix injections after Cialis didn't do anything for me. I asked about penile rehab but he just said for me to "play around down there". He may be a good surgeon, but a terrible "coach" for a man's problems. With help of a vibrator, my wife was able to bring me to orgasm which I'm grateful for. She also experienced dryness, so the vibrator worked for her too. I lost her to a stroke a year ago. But we had fun with non-penetrative sex while she was living. Frank Sinatra sung about "September of my Years" but I feel like I'm in late November. I'm 78.
Hi there, thanks for your comment! We are so pleased that you found this video helpful and relatable for your situation. We are so pleased to hear that you have found a vibrator to be helpful for bringing you to orgasm too.
Thank you Fiona for your experience with having sexual relations with your partner post prostatectomy. I’m going through these similar experience too but haven’t tried injections to help me out. I rely on the pills and does work if you do it properly and timed properly. I do have organisms of sorts not like it was but still can get that feeling of satisfaction. I know it takes about 2 years to have complete recovery in the nerve sensations during sex but I think for me I’m on corse maybe even ahead of schedule. Kudos Fiona for sharing.
Hi Bernie thanks for sharing your experiences and appreciation for Fiona's story we are so pleased it resonated with you and you have found it valuable.
Hi Jill, thanks for your message. As there are a lot of topics within rehabilitation post prostate cancer treatment, one of the best places to go on our website to take a quick glance at what we cover is [the FAQ section.](www.atouchysubject.com/a-touchy-subject-faqs) Kegels are very important for recovering continence, but also help with erectile function, and also to strengthen orgasms. In fact, a new interview with expert physiotherapist Dr. Jo Milios will be (*launched shortly/has launched)*, taking a deep dive into kegel exercises and how they help with these functions. If you would like to learn more about how to perform a kegel exercise, please see this video: [best kegel exercises for men to speed up recovery from incontinence after prostatectomy - UA-cam](ua-cam.com/video/XLxu1R2fVkw/v-deo.html)
SKIP TO DIFFERENT SECTIONS:
1:28 Fiona and Alan's relationship before surgery.
3:24 How sex changed after Alan's prostate cancer surgery (prostatectomy)
4:42 What it was like talking about sex after surgery
6:38 How she responded to the erectile dysfunction
8:13 What it was like using trying Viagra and injections to create erections
10:56 The challenge of intentional rather than spontaneous sex
12:54 How Fiona's sexual function changed after cancer and menopause
14:32 What helped Fiona overcome painful sex and vaginal dryness
17:17 Did her healthcare professionals talk to her about sexual side effects?
18:43 What Fiona wishes all healthcare professionals knew about sexual communication
20:41 Why they have not given up sex even though so much has changed
23:04 Fiona's recipe for keeping their sex life going in the future
26:38 What they do when penetrative sex is not an option
29:25 Navigate project: decision making tool for low risk prostate cancer
I was speechless after listening to this session yesterday (four years after it was created.) I had to wait a day before commenting. Fiona's attitude, approach, and candor was (is) simply amazing. I'm five months out from prostate surgery and found the open discussion very helpful and encouraging. Words are inadequate, nonetheless Thank You. The fact that this kind of deeply personal insight can be shared across time and distance (I'm in North Carolina USA) is wonderful and incredible.
Hi Michael, we are so moved and beyond grateful for your kind comments! We are so very pleased you found this resource valuable and insightful. We wish you all the very best for your rehabilitation.
I am so grateful for the candidness and openness in discussing this delicate issue - also for the gentle sense of pleasure and humor from Fiona ( & Alan) - Wow
Hi Gary we are so pleased you enjoyed this resource!
It should be mandatory for all couples to watch this.
I have incredible respect for Fiona. Thank you risking talking about your sex life. The information was helpful.
What a wonderful resource. Thank you. My deepest respect.
Thank you, Richard. I am so pleased to hear that.
Thank you for sharing this segment with me featuring Ms White - she is a treasure for sure. I see this was done 4 years ago - but remains very much applicable today, and like much revered literature, will remain viable for years to come. It seems progress in this area of sexuality moves at a snails pace, however it is this kind of information that gives hope to the sufferers.
Hi Mark, thank you very much for your comment and your kind words of appreciation. We love hearing from our community and we are so pleased you have found value in it.
Thank you so much for this perspective. Very helpful.
So glad to hear you've found this helpful Patrick!
Thanks Victoria, and Fiona…., you are awesome… 🙏
Hi Stephen, you are welcome! So pleased you found this helpful
Thank you so much for sharing the information.
Thanks so much Fiona! You are very brave!
Hi there! Thanks for your comment, we agree with you! Pleased you enjoyed the video :)
Although I didn't have cancer, I did have an orchiectomy due to tumors on both testicles. Of course, as one knows there is a loss of sensations in that area after the surgery. It's been about 20 years now. Arousal is very difficult and frustrating, I can only have partial erections which do not allow for intercourse. We are now limited to a very small number of sexual activities that were previously foreplay. In our 40+ year of marriage we've never discussed sex....it just happened. We have been at a point in which we should and cant. I admire the frank discussion of trying new things and being playful. I don't have the courage to bring it up with my wife.
Hi Roadstar thanks for your comment, we can appreciate your frustrations on your journey and also around having trouble discussing this with your wife. Please know you are not alone. It could be worth exploring our Online Support Group resource for men after prostate cancer surgery: www.atouchysubject.com/blog/online-support-groups-prostate-cancer I hope this helps!
Thank you for this video! I wish this video appeared 9 years ago. My experience was the same as Alan's after surgery - flaccid penis retracted into my body and no erections. Urologist wanted to prescribe trimix injections after Cialis didn't do anything for me. I asked about penile rehab but he just said for me to "play around down there". He may be a good surgeon, but a terrible "coach" for a man's problems.
With help of a vibrator, my wife was able to bring me to orgasm which I'm grateful for. She also experienced dryness, so the vibrator worked for her too. I lost her to a stroke a year ago. But we had fun with non-penetrative sex while she was living. Frank Sinatra sung about "September of my Years" but I feel like I'm in late November. I'm 78.
Hi there, thanks for your comment! We are so pleased that you found this video helpful and relatable for your situation. We are so pleased to hear that you have found a vibrator to be helpful for bringing you to orgasm too.
Thank you Fiona for your experience with having sexual relations with your partner post prostatectomy. I’m going through these similar experience too but haven’t tried injections to help me out. I rely on the pills and does work if you do it properly and timed properly. I do have organisms of sorts not like it was but still can get that feeling of satisfaction. I know it takes about 2 years to have complete recovery in the nerve sensations during sex but I think for me I’m on corse maybe even ahead of schedule. Kudos Fiona for sharing.
Hi Bernie thanks for sharing your experiences and appreciation for Fiona's story we are so pleased it resonated with you and you have found it valuable.
Thank you so much ❤
Thanks for the female perspective!
Hi Robert, our pleasure! We are pleased to hear you found this helpful!
How did u cover the incontinence issue with sex
Hi Andy, we have a resource for this: ua-cam.com/video/Xl_hLKWRGGg/v-deo.html Hope this helps!!
After my prostate op my wife withdrew totally from sex. We have been married now for 53 years and have not had sex in the last twelve years.
Where do you purchase Silk and what sex toys are a good place to start
Link is given - www.sylk.com.au/
Those esses are annoying.
How did u cover the incontinence issue with sex
Hi Jill, thanks for your message. As there are a lot of topics within rehabilitation post prostate cancer treatment, one of the best places to go on our website to take a quick glance at what we cover is [the FAQ section.](www.atouchysubject.com/a-touchy-subject-faqs)
Kegels are very important for recovering continence, but also help with erectile function, and also to strengthen orgasms. In fact, a new interview with expert physiotherapist Dr. Jo Milios will be (*launched shortly/has launched)*, taking a deep dive into kegel exercises and how they help with these functions.
If you would like to learn more about how to perform a kegel exercise, please see this video: [best kegel exercises for men to speed up recovery from incontinence after prostatectomy - UA-cam](ua-cam.com/video/XLxu1R2fVkw/v-deo.html)
Thanks for sharing your experience.