I confided in my mother about my sexuality. By the morning she outed me to everyone after she said I could trust her. Now she has rewritten history and made herself the victim. Plus after my mom outed me they took me to the cemetery to purchase a gravesite because I was going to die. Then the family called me some homophobic words. To this day she at times says some really hateful things. That's is why I dont associate with my family and moved far away. She does call time to time she wants me to take care of her because she has a illness. Hell no I won't help her out. I've given my family a second chance amd they destroyed that to. She has money and is giving it all to my sister and wrote me out of the will. So let my sister take care of her. I feel nothing for my family. Ive made my own money and I am independent .
Daniel Cruz you should probably wait till you can move out and not depend on your family and just live your life how you want it’s sad but I guess it’s something to look forward too
A true lover There could be many reasons I guess. Maybe your mom keeps talking about a wife and kids, so you have to let her know you’re gay. Maybe all your friends keep asking why you don’t have a girlfriend, it’s about being honest instead of lying to loved ones.
Thank you for your story. I am 76 and have been with my husband for 58 years! Never officially came out and fortunately was able to live a happy and normal life. I wish you all the best for your future happiness.
People like you make me feel hopeful. I'm 21 and have been "fully out" since I was 15 (aka when I was outed to my parents), but I have yet to found someone that I wanted to be in a serious relationship with (only twice, but beyond a few kisses and sex, the feelings weren't reciprocated). Growing up without anyone to look up to, it's very hard to imagine yourself in a happy monogamous relationship with someone, where I both love them and am loved back for who I am. In fact, It's hard just to imagine myself having any future at all, if I'm being honest.
I’m so pleased to see such mature, eloquent young gay guys being so beautifully honest. Jacob, you have helped so many come to terms with their own hidden feelings. Thank you
Life is so much better out of the closet. I came out pretty young at 16 and it is the best thing I've ever done for myself! Now I'm in my 30s and wouldn't change a thing. Congrats man!
It took me until the age of 40 to come out have been with my partner 20 years. Being Scottish and gay you had to keep that hidden in the 60's,70's and 80's. But it is the best thing I ever did was to be honest with myself,friends & family, so congratulations.
Well done Jacob. It takes guts to come out and you made it look easy. As an out gay senior, I am proud of you. I wish you a lifetime of happiness. 🏳️🌈 ♥️
Two things: 1. If you find out someone's gay it is NOT OK to out them. 2. The fact that your friend spent an entire hour in therapy talking about you and not about his relationship is a great indicative of how much he cares about you!
Hey Jacob congrats, Bill here, i am 62 now and was married to my x wife for 30 yrs and came out at 50. I too was worried about what ppl thought but nobody really cares now a days. I like who i am and my life. I wish u all the best that life has to offer, you deserve it.
Bill Mason Me too! Because I was heavily involved in sport- I was a youth cricket coach from my 16th until my 39th, went on tour with the Dutch national team under 19 for the international youth cricket tournament in Toronto and at the Bermudas, took my boys to England and Denmark may times and played on a high level myself- I didn’t quite fancy to out of the closet. I was even married for 29 years. In 2005 I left my wife, we divorced and at last I was free! In 2006 I met a wonderful man and this is the best what has ever happened to me. I’ve never been as happy as during these last 14 years (neither is he, I believe :)!).
Gary Lee, you seem to not be able to keep your mouth shut when actually you should. Wondering why you are so interested to comment on all these coming out videos.
Bill Mason .....bill, you deserved the best too. You came out too late, why. I guess you missed most of the best. I came out three months after I got married. I did not want that life.....it stinks.
Jacob, thank you for your story. I came out as bi to my parents when I was 31 years old. What I remember is dead silence. Several months later I wanted to talk to my Mother about it and she said that she doesn't want to talk. My close friends are not bothered about my orientation. Most of my colleagues at work knew. Several years later all of them have moved on to other jobs so my present colleagues don't know except for my supervisors. I came out to one of my current colleagues a few weeks ago and to her it was blip on the screen. No big deal. High school was not fun for me. Nobody knew my orientation. I suspect some of my classmates knew. I did not anticipate that my comment would be so lengthy. Thank you Jacob.
We haven’t talked in forever, but I remember us being best friends when we were younger. And all I want to say is you’re so strong and I’m so frikken proud of you Jacob. Keep being you❤️ miss you!
@Gary Lee He literally didnt talk about sex, not even once. The fact that you think you think you can desensitize the coming out experience by simply generalizing it as "butt sex" is rude and ignorant.
I am gay and proud my family already knew that I was gay. When I told my sister I cried she says that I love you I don't care what you are. I hope that you have a good life you are so sweet to tell everyone about you story ❤️
I guarantee that in High School you weren’t the only one. Glad you are free from the shackles secrecy and fear place on people like us. Now you can live, love, laugh and be the man you were always meant to be.
Listening to your coming out story- when you shared that 22 people texted, you and your dad's friends started talking about you. I started to tear up. It brings me back to overcoming the "shame" I felt and the loneliness I experienced as I navigated my sexuality. I came out when I was 19 years old, and although people could guess that I was gay, I never came out and said it until I was 19. It was a bittersweet experience for me. My mother cried when I came out to her.
When I came out 40 years ago I couldn't even dream that there would be a time where people could come out to the world the way you have. When I see and hear stories like yours it helps me see how much the world has changed since my time of coming out. Have the life that I could only dream about, be happy (your kind of happy, no-one elses) and thanks for making an old queen happy for a moment.
Gregory Dewbery,we must be around the same age, this coming July 2020 My significant other and I will celebrate our 30th year together. Married 6 year's and I received a letter from Barrack Obama right after he legalized same sex marriage. I had wrote him ,Thanking him for doing so and he sent me a response. ❤
I'm so pleased you've come out. Your realizing that true friends don't care if your gay or not. I'm 62 and came out at 57. I grew up in a different time in rural Kansas. Coming out was the best thing I ever did. Only wish I could of come out at your age.
I'm out to my mum, little brother, big sister, 2 cousins, my aunt, and a few friends who were all accepting. I was also outed so this video resonated with me. Despite the fact that I am out to the persons who matter to me, and I'm at my most comfortable state in my life, I never stopped watching these videos because I love to hear different coming out stories. Thank you for sharing your story Jacob. You're incredible and I am looking forward to what's to come ❤❤❤
Everyone at my High School decided for me. They judged me and treated me accordingly. So I never got to become a social animal and hang out with friends because I didn't have any. Nearly 30 years after graduating and I'm still haunted by the experience. I know only to well the mental health aspects you talk about. Be grateful and appreciate that you are braver and stronger than you give yourself credit for.
This video just appeared in my timeline. I'm glad that it did. As an elder gay who has been out for over 23 years, I am so happy that you are happy. We all come to that place in our own time, but when we get there, it is truly amazing. Keep shining your light and blazing a trail for those that will follow you!
One thing I've learned in life is that when you are young, mostly during your high school and college years, you want to be liked and you worry about what people think about you. Then when you get to middle age.....your forties and fifties you don't care what they think......When you get to your seventies and eighties you discover they weren't thinking of you at all.
Thanks for sharing your story. I'm 58, and I remember just how difficult my own self-realization and coming out was...during a very different time in our world. Hearing you share your story is in itself a gift to others who come after you that "it's ok" and that there is an authentic life ahead. Aloha! Be Safe and Be Well! Alan
Hey Jacob! I love how you were able to be so insightful and sensitive in telling your story. You listened to your inner feelings and saved yourself a lifetime of self-loathing and depression. Be thankful you live at this point in history; the future is on your side ... and vice-versa.
sounds like you have the greatest best friend...the kind of guy that was so impacted by you coming out to him that he needed to process it for an hour but then (I'm guessing) still loved and cared for you afterwards
It's never easy to express for who you really are in this world because people will judge you, but at the end of the day it's you who know who you are. As long as you won't hurt anybody then feel free to be true to yourself and most important thing is ACCEPTANCE. So proud of you Jacob. Raise our flag 🌈 ☺️
Be happy that your first experience was a real, true, deep infatuation (“crush”) and that you felt heartbreak- I remember being exhilirated- it felt so exciting and so oh sooo right! - also clearly somebody did something right in raising you so that you could feel that in the first place with someone else- and you will be much less likely to fall into unhealthy relationships throughout your life. So It’s been like 4 years since you posted this, and I clicked and now am commenting- so I hope you are doing amazingly well especially since you seem so down to earth and also because you are canadian (not gonna lie, my bias is real 😂)- and you’re totally someone I’d be attracted to- you fit my type - so there’s that
Similar story coming out it’s tougher growing up mixed race Islander & German(White) it’s tough my whole family & few friends disowned me and distanced themselves. I didn’t care much, as longs as I was happy and moved overseas for a better life and it’s been good so far!
My attitude has always been that I don’t need anyone’s acceptance for who I decide to sleep with.I’ve had some members of my family suddenly change negatively towards me and I was like ‘Tough.Deal with it and get on with your own lives.Hate shouldn’t be hobby so get another one’.I’m happy.
A bit of a roller coaster story. Some good and cute and funny and some not so good. The part about your best friend talking about you during his entire therapy session even though his gf of 4 years had just broken up with him was heartwarming to hear. Clearly your friendship was super important to him.
9:51 I completely get this. I've barely come out personally to most of the people in my school but bc i find the actual process of coming out to be very anxiety inducing and awkward. So after a few weeks of being out to my closest friends I told some of them that I trusted them to make a good judgement on who they thought would take my sexuality well and tell them. When I did this I said that it was ok for the people my friends told that they could also tell other people. I like this because it made it so that my coming out would spread relatively slowly in the beginning and then when I was a lot more comfortable and supported that I could let it go a lot more quickly and out of my control. Now i'm pretty sure all of my school year knows, but have know idea how many do or who they are. Because of this assumption that everyone knows i'm a lot more confident than I was. :)
I'm so happy for you. I came out of the closet to my parents a month ago. Every time I think about it gives me a form of peace that I hadn't felt in 13 years.
Easy said, translated it means, if your Mom doesn't like you, it's the wrong Mom for you. It means coming out can cause breakups. That is exactly what people fear. Now you try to comfort somebody with "breakup is good for your".
ist easy for somebody on the outside to say this when they haven't experienced what somebody is going through, and even if you have everyone handles things differently because everyone is different.
@@williamreed5528 yep I get it! After watching lord knows maybe 200 coming out stories and while there is a blah blah blah side to these stories they serve a critical purpose to the one telling the story, their friends and family and those who are still clueless that gay people even exist in truth! (Oh he isn't really gay, it's just a phase!) [denial mind set!] Best !!
Good for you. It sucks that so many people live their lives trying to please others. Or trying to hide who they really are just to cater to people's judgment. I wish you lots of happiness and love in your life 😄🌈
I must be at least 15-20 years older than you, and the thing that struck me the most about your story is how it was almost precisely the same for me back in my university days. Some details were different of course, but I remember every single feeling you described like it was yesterday. On the one hand, it's always great to hear someone making this important journey. But on the other hand, it makes me a little sad to think things still haven't changed in all this time. I would've hoped by now people didn't have to go through the same crushing self doubt and fear of losing friends and family just because of who they are. Glad it's worked out well for you, you should be proud of yourself! :)
I feel like I am one of the only people here who does not actually know you. I found this video by googling "coming out" videos on youtube. I'm bisexual but definitely lean more to girls. I have a pretty conservative family but I'm trying to find courage in others, like you. I'm glad you were able to rise up out of being outed, someone in my past tried to out me (actually multiple times) but it's still with me. Wish you well my friend 🤟
Own your peace brother! Thank you for sharing. My mother passed when I was sixteen and I came out a year later. Not sure I could have come out to her, a super religious woman. However, she was the one human in my life to teach me to be true to myself. Thank you for sharing your story. Be strong!
Thank you my little Canadian brother. You did a great job on your story and I'm so happy for you. You seem like a wonderful person and you'll make someone a very happy man. You'll be in my prayers.
My mother found out before I was ready to tell her and when she confronted me with it I remember feeling terrified. Things got really ugly between us for a while but in hind sight it was the best thing to happen to me because I no longer had to carry the weight of my secret and I felt free. Even though she was angry. Even though she kicked me out of the house. Even though our relationship was strained, I felt so free and happy that none of that mattered. So happy you’re in a healthy place in life. Thanks for sharing your story. :)
Hope things get better and better with you.Sorry that you weren’t accepted by your mom.Some parents don’t realize how fortunate they are to be blessed with kids.What really counts is that you are free and happy and not hiding who you are.Maybe she will realize what she did was wrong and if she doesn’t it’s her loss,not yours.Been in your shoes before so I know what it’s like being rejected by someone who’s supposed to love you unconditionally.
You have to remember that you are not going to give your parents grandchildren Say goodbye to the family legacy and the family name. So for some people that's very important. Grandchildren for a lot of people is the icing on the cake. I never got married because I never found the right woman. But I saw the expression on my parent's faces when my brother would stop by with his kids. They would lite up with joy when the grandchildren showed up. So I can understand when parents are not happy with their gay children.
I was outed to my entire family by a football player (who I thought was a friend) who was upset because I did not want to “make out” with him (at the time I was dating his friend) This was my freshman year in HS back in 1999. It was my first betrayal experience .. it was heartbreaking.
I am gay and didn't come out until I was 29 years old and AFTER being married to a woman for 7 years. I have been with my husband for 31 years now and wish you all the happiness that I have found in my life. God bless you my friend !
I'm going to add to this because it's not always bad or sad when coming out. I'm a 66 year old man. My mother who I speak of was born in 1924 with a Catholic upbringing. I never thought of myself as coming out or being gay. We were told in those days many boys in their youth 'mess-about' with other boys and it's part of growing up and finding your sexuality. At some point a boy will move on to girls. So I waited and waited even thinking I was a 'late developer' and would get around to girls eventually. Dated the occasional girl at school but more because everyone else was. On leaving school at 16 I went to 'Men only' clubs and realised I wasn't going to change. By 17, I had my first love and when it ended I was crushed. I had no one to talk too properly and felt down and depressed. One day I was sitting in the livingroom and my Mother asked me what was wrong? At first I tried to deny anything but she insisted. Suddenly tears rolled down my face and I told her that I had loved a guy but it was now over and I missed him. She listened and we talked. She told me she would always be there if I needed to talk ever again. Later she told my sister who accepted me and when she married she told her husband who was equally open. When I asked her why she just said, she needed to know he was ok with it before she married him. I felt so much better knowing my parent knew but I never pushed the gay agenda to my mother or expected her to accept my gay lifestyle. I would never taking a guy back (except once or twice) or kiss a guy in front of her....wouldn't have done it with a girl either! She did meet my gay friends as well as the odd relationships or two and never judged me or them for being gay. Infact she got on so well with one of my exes that he use to visit her long after we were over, which was annoying for me! I never came out to my work colleagues because that's exactly what they were colleagues so not importent enough to come out too specificall, after all never did with my parent so why do it for them. But I never hid my lifestyle from them just never added the tag GAY. So I would tell them about my weekend as I went to a club danced all night with friends and me and xxx went back to mine at dawn, had breakfast and went to bed, we didn't wake until late Sundays! That's how I would describe my weekend if asked. I'm out to my family who can see me and my present relationship on my face book page should they want and his family are fantast. They are Spanish and I am older than his parents but they chat away with me in their broken English and I in my broken Spanish. Why because they know I care for their son and that's what counts to them. As it turned out my cousin who came from a religious upbringing has a daughter who is gay and lives in Australia with her wife and new baby. So things can and will change, being gay doesn't mean being alone or having a sad life. If I can have all of this during my life in an age of illegality for being homosexual, homophobia out and proud usually beating the shit out of some poor soul, clause 28 or whatever with Thatcher and Whitehouse. Then you must be able to with what's there today.
I'm so fucking proud of you Dude! I've been out fo 2 years this month now. My best friend becomes more closer to me when I told him. He understood me. He is straight, has kid and family. He is so fucking supportive. It feels like heaven. I don't have any gay freinds. And my coming was the best gift I've ever given to myself. But listen, no matter what you do, people has always something to say. So just do what you think makes you happy disregarding the approval of others. Just do it for yourself and fuck society! Be stronger and stronger. The world is squeezing us.
95% of my friends are straight and they were so supportive too! I’m glad you had a similar experience. You definitely feel a much stronger bond after coming out and it’s this stress that’s been removed finally.
Proud of you! Take what’s rightfully yours. Your life, love and identity. I‘m one of those „typical“ mummies who knows her children better than they know themselves... just like i knew my son was gay wayyyy earlier then he outed himself to me. That was at the age of 18... now he‘s 27... i‘m proud of him like i‘m proud of all you guys living and loving your life because you only have this one life and because nobody should ever be afraid or ashamed of loving the person you want to love, no matter what! Make your life extraordinary, Jacob! I‘ll be cheering for ya... Greetings from Germany 🍀
Your mother should be very proud to have raised such a beautiful intelligent son. Wishing you a happy life. Btw you can still marry and have children. 💜
I love that the first time ever you came out, it was because you thought it wasn’t fair to your mom.❤ I respect people who love their own family. 😊 Wish I’d find someone like that one day.
Moms always seem to know, so did mine. Love her. Thanks for sharing your story with us. You teared me up twice, first with the story of you leaving your mom at the station, second the story of your friends supporting you. I‘m happy for you being out now. Take care (especially these times) and have fun.
Two important points: 1. In case of a stressful occurrence people - normal - may star to behave distinctively different usually they just back away from their usual behaviour and get less active and more distant. If anyone would ever observe such a change by a close person don’t become offended or resentful but be aware that something important has taken place and try to assist the person and give the person time to come out with that. 2. He said - as long as he had been closeted his self esteem has been limited and he has judged himself only by what other people have been thinking about him. After coming out he regained respect for himself and his self esteem has returned to its due place. It is true. If whoever judges himself by what other people say - be sure that that person wastes his life and means nothing. Is almost nothing. Never do it. Only temporarily if we need get back on track. Overall - he is quite normal, not a haughty boy, quite sensitive and handsome. And full of energy. He is young still and he makes most of it now. Great. I would like to listen to his further stories !
I remember agonizing for 3 years living with my bf. I finally went home & asked her to sit down and I finally sed that I was gay. Without skipping a beat she just sed let's go out for breakfast. Felt like Mt Everest was lifted off my shoulders! I love you Mom! Rest in peace ❤
Amazing story. So proud of your courage and vulnerability. You’re a smart mature young man. I was exactly like you but ended up getting married and had kids and came out at 40. I don’t have any regrets because of my three amazing kids but no debate. Being out and authentic is the only Way to go. Congrats!
Your story resonates with me. It took me years to come out and even now that I am out, it still feels like I'm not out. Conservative family. Conservative country. Hate crimes. I love your story and wish I could speak to you to help me boost my confidence etc. I am still worried that people will find out and their reactions so I don't feel that I am me yet even though my family has known for about 8-9 years. It is not a subject we ever talk about. It's not like reality. I feel like I'm back in the closet. I need help to find me and be me
Hey how are you? I hope You are ok? I'm sorry to hear this, i am from Philippines it is the same here we don't talk about it but they know me for Who I am, I am just concern to my nephews and nieces to explain who I am just because my sisters teaching them to call their uncle gay and which is me.. so Kinda Feel awkward to be around with them... But what you feel is totally valid you just have to let it go.. As long as your support system are ok with you, you will be good
I went through that period of anger too. Your story with your mom and the way you shared it was so … funny because I can only imagine how you felt in that moment and how relieved you must have been when she texted you the second time. Also, your ability to tell a story was so amazing, that I felt like you were sharing it with me. I hope your life is all it can be! Thanks for posting!
it took some time for me to come out. I came out when I was 26 only because my family thought my little brother was gay and I heard my mom say if one of my kids is gay I will kill myself. I know what it is like to be outed out by people who actually think they are important part of your life. They ruined that moment for me and that was suppose to my courage to come out to people that I loved but it wasn't, I will never get it back. I just defended my sexuality after that and moved to the city where people were accepting. didn't come back to my home town until 10 years time and came back stronger and didn't have to hide who I was and two of my nephews came out because they saw that I came out to my family. I look forward to seeing more posts. good job
The part I loved best was when you said you heard you mom say she would kill herself if you were gay. Typical Breeder guilt. You are gay so let them get over it. You aren't obliged to get over anything. If you parents taught you to love instead of hate they wouldn't have the problem not you.
I cant tell you on how proud of you on coming out!!! You are young but yet you are on the right path and direction.....I came out when I was 14 and it was tough for me. My parents took me to a shrink because she thought that it just was just a phase.....but it wasn't. She's has been happy for me ever since! Be yourself, be honest to everyone including your family, and first and foremost be HAPPY and PROUD!!! There is a saying that goes......I dont care what you look on the outside, it is what is on the inside that counts. I AM proud of you on coming out and I salute you :)
So many parts of your story resonated with me. I too had a hard time accepting myself at first and tried to bury and tried to go as bi, but after a while, I couldn't ignore the fact that I'm a lesbian. I have been coming out to friends for almost 2 years now, but I didn't want to tell my family. But, like your mom, my mom knew and told my dad to get ready for it. She confronted me, and while the situation has been rocky for a while, they are finally starting to be more accepting. You are so brave for sharing your story online, thank you! ❤️
I'm a straight female but I'm watching coming out videos lol instead of studying. Good for you for coming out and being your true self. Hi from Ontario and damn, your Alberta accent is strong.
Jacob I went to a very small high school years back. Did the same thing when I went to UBC. Don't be surprised when you go to a school reunion to find out you were not the only one. What brings a smile to my face is the girls that told me they liked dating me as I was different than the rest of the guys as I was not always trying cop a feel.
Hi, Jacob. Thanks for sharing your story. Two things I got touched by in your narration: 1) The Magic. That feeling of when you are with a person, and you really you want to be with them, rather than those you were told you were supposed to like and be with, that is pure magic! and it's so heartwarming that you listened to your own wish/desire/heart and followed it. Be only with the ones you feel that magic. 2) Resilience. Although being outed is not the best way to start living your true self (I think it is violent -either on purpose or by accident) it was a big opportunity for you. Going through the overwhelming times, and finding ways to cope with the adversity, and after all that, coming out of the whole thing as a new, brave and happy person is almost the living meaning of resilience. I am sorry if this comment is too long. Greetings from Mexico!
Jacob everything in your life only get better after you accept yourself. I'm 70 years old and I came out to my Parents when I was 17 years old. My Parents were very accepting in a day and age when it wasn't Socially Acceptable. I was a Jock of the 1st Order and no one ever even though that I was Gay. My Partner and I were together for over 40 year until his Death 7 years ago. He was my History Prof in College, I was 22 and he was 32. Life is Good and I wish you the best in the Years to come. Peace & Love Always. Jessiah
i came out over 30 yrs ago....best thing i ever done.....lets you see who your friends are and who to trust........live your life for you - dont let anything ever hold you back..........do what makes you happy.........most folk are transient in youre life so it doesnt really matter what they think,say or do.......concentrate on you and achieve everything you want.........and if youve a bf who isnt ever on the same page replace them immediately-dont think about it and delay...........shall i say more?
Really enjoyed your video. I came out decades ago at 33. My only regret is not doing so earlier. I watch coming out stories like yours once in awhile to see if the process is getting easier for our youth. Très fier de toi.
My partner came out at 15 also to crazy religious parents and that didn’t go well either. He moved out at 16 and still has a strained relationship with them almost 20yrs later.
Dan Gagné all religious written word, has been written by man! Many religions stem from judaism ✡️! The Koran doesn’t always get proper translation into English! There are compelling arguments against those commonly used phrases from the Bible “ Man shall not lie with man” etc.
Dan Gagné many of these religions didn’t exist until 1000 years after Christ died! Meanings of words change over time! In the English language to say I like that, instead people have said... that’s hot, that’s cool, that’s rad, it’s the bomb, it’s off the hook, it’s off the chain, that’s mad hot, that’s banging, countless other terms! So imagine trying to translate a book from 1000 years earlier from a different language!
Thank you Jacob for your candor and transparency. I think,cas a game man, outing others and passing on the news robs the gay person of control over how and when to come out to whom. And of course small towns are the worst for everybodybknowing your business. I'm 79 y.o. and it warms my heart that it is now possible for you to have everything you once dreamed of: marriage, children, a fog and white picket fence. You are such an important role model for other young gays who have not yet come out. Thank you for helping others in the gay world to imagine there is a good life after being outed.
So glad to hear you mentioning the emotional aspect to this. It's not just who you want to sleep with. I was super shy in high school so I'd just go out with any girl who expressed interest (only a few did, lol) and I figured "okay, this seems to work so... I guess I'm Bi?" Then in college I met a guy I clicked with and we started dating and it was like WHAM! - THIS is what it feels like to be in love. THIS is what I've been looking for. It wasn't until then that I really knew I was gay. :)
Jacob, I hope that you continued to have this bravery and comfort these past three years. Your attitude is/was contagious. Keep being positive and trusting of what you feel and know from within. Best wishes.
I am very proud of you for coming out as you did I know that it must have been very hard for you but you have done it good for you as you see, I am not last years chicken by any means I came out when I was in high school by mistake but I have no regrets today what so ever it wasn't easy back then but I have made and I am very happily married to a wonder full man we have been together for 29 years now and I have no reason not to believe we live like this until the end, I also have every reason to believe that one day you will meet someone also and have a great life together I wish all the best and God Bless and keep you. ❤️❤️❤️
Just be you Jacob ❤️ you seem like a lovely man. Life is way too short for being unhappy 🙁 and afraid of what others think of you. I know this from harsh reality. Shine and be you. Thank you for sharing ❤❤❤
Thank you so much. You are brave and don't be afraid anymore.. Have a wonderful life. Born in '43 it was a nightmare to be gay: except for a small minority we got it from everyone and every institution of society. You never forget.
I hope you always find the love, respect, and dignity you deserve. Always fight for these things. Be true to yourself, and the man that you love, and you will find the strength that you need. Also, follow your bliss.
Jacob, Thanks for sharing your story of coming out. I am so glad for you to have come so far and especially to share with others. Very well said. Thanks again and best wishes going forward.
Thanks for telling your story; and also for developing an early understanding of it’s not just about sex; claiming your authenticity is not an easy journey; take your own pace. Glad you’re finding being out positive. Hope you have a wonderful life.
Good story. And most especially good that you decided to simply live - and not fight living, your truth and to live IN your truth, g. All the best to you! 👍🏾
Hey Jacob! I really felt every word in this video, I’ve gone through a very similar journey of learning I need to be honest with myself and everyone I care about because pretending to be someone your not can really affect your mental health. I recently came out on Facebook a few months ago and I’ve never been happier! Feeling like I can be who I am proud to be means everything. Thank you for sharing your journey with us here I’m sure it has helped so many other ppl still struggling inside the closet. Btw you’re so f cute!!
Its crazy how different things have become, idk if its just that im in an accepting part of the world (California) or if its just different times but its way different in my highschool, like usually all the “gay” people are the most popular in my whole district and usually they are the ones winning prom king and homecoming king and stuff like that. And its kinda been like that for my whole school experience, like every since 1st grade, and its crazy to me hearing how different things were or are in the world.
Good that you're not wasting years trying to change something you didn't choose and that doesn't go away. The rational choice is to accept yourself as you are and live your life to the fullest. I hope you find someone to love and who will love you back in this life. You deserve it.
Jacob, thanks for your story. It is true, if we can't live as we are, or tell the people who love us who we are, it can easily cause pressure and disappointed that would eventually eat us away. I can feel that, sometimes I become very easily to get angry and really unhappy.
You appeared in my recommended feed. I said to myself let me watch. Dang! That was a story. Out of something bad something good came from it too. You have courage. You have strength. I still do not like how you outed, but I am glad you are out and living your best life. You stay happy and healthy. I will subscribe.
i am so terribly sorry for your experience and everything it may have caused you, but when i saw the thumbnail i was immediately compelled to comment how extraordinarily STUNNING and mesmerizing you are like? i know this is shallow and irrelevant but you're genuinely one of the most beautiful humans i've ever seen
Jacob, SO pleased that you are out. Sorry that you were bragged out of the closet before you were ready to tell everyone. Such a Bad thing to happen to you. Be safe, be resilient!! Love your mom!!! Live your most authentic self!!! So proud of you!!!
I confided in my mother about my sexuality. By the morning she outed me to everyone after she said I could trust her. Now she has rewritten history and made herself the victim. Plus after my mom outed me they took me to the cemetery to purchase a gravesite because I was going to die. Then the family called me some homophobic words. To this day she at times says some really hateful things. That's is why I dont associate with my family and moved far away. She does call time to time she wants me to take care of her because she has a illness. Hell no I won't help her out. I've given my family a second chance amd they destroyed that to. She has money and is giving it all to my sister and wrote me out of the will. So let my sister take care of her. I feel nothing for my family. Ive made my own money and I am independent .
That's one of the potential reasons I haven't told my family
Daniel Cruz you should probably wait till you can move out and not depend on your family and just live your life how you want it’s sad but I guess it’s something to look forward too
Why should you tell others about your sexuality? Have you ever seen a straight guy coming out !!?
A true lover There could be many reasons I guess. Maybe your mom keeps talking about a wife and kids, so you have to let her know you’re gay. Maybe all your friends keep asking why you don’t have a girlfriend, it’s about being honest instead of lying to loved ones.
chris toey it’s super easy, just tell them that you are a red piller and you hate females cause they love conditionally and see us as an ATM machine
Thank you for your story. I am 76 and have been with my husband for 58 years! Never officially came out and fortunately was able to live a happy and normal life. I wish you all the best for your future happiness.
Very true. Does anyones parents need to know? I wouldnt tell my parents they don't need to do.
God Bless years ago they would say here is Bob and his Friend...... Remember the movie That Certain Summer....
People like you make me feel hopeful. I'm 21 and have been "fully out" since I was 15 (aka when I was outed to my parents), but I have yet to found someone that I wanted to be in a serious relationship with (only twice, but beyond a few kisses and sex, the feelings weren't reciprocated). Growing up without anyone to look up to, it's very hard to imagine yourself in a happy monogamous relationship with someone, where I both love them and am loved back for who I am. In fact, It's hard just to imagine myself having any future at all, if I'm being honest.
58 year - Wonderful 👵🏽👋🏾🍃🦅🍃🦌🍃🦬🍃🌈💫🌈💫
wow I'm sorry but I'm happy for you and your husband. How cute!
I’m so pleased to see such mature, eloquent young gay guys being so beautifully honest. Jacob, you have helped so many come to terms with their own hidden feelings. Thank you
Life is so much better out of the closet. I came out pretty young at 16 and it is the best thing I've ever done for myself! Now I'm in my 30s and wouldn't change a thing. Congrats man!
It took me until the age of 40 to come out have been with my partner 20 years. Being Scottish and gay you had to keep that hidden in the 60's,70's and 80's. But it is the best thing I ever did was to be honest with myself,friends & family, so congratulations.
Yes Amen 🙏!!
Well done Jacob. It takes guts to come out and you made it look easy. As an out gay senior, I am proud of you. I wish you a lifetime of happiness. 🏳️🌈 ♥️
Two things: 1. If you find out someone's gay it is NOT OK to out them.
2. The fact that your friend spent an entire hour in therapy talking about you and not about his relationship is a great indicative of how much he cares about you!
Hey Jacob congrats, Bill here, i am 62 now and was married to my x wife for 30 yrs and came out at 50. I too was worried about what ppl thought but nobody really cares now a days. I like who i am and my life. I wish u all the best that life has to offer, you deserve it.
Bill Mason Me too! Because I was heavily involved in sport- I was a youth cricket coach from my 16th until my 39th, went on tour with the Dutch national team under 19 for the international youth cricket tournament in Toronto and at the Bermudas, took my boys to England and Denmark may times and played on a high level myself- I didn’t quite fancy to out of the closet. I was even married for 29 years. In 2005 I left my wife, we divorced and at last I was free! In 2006 I met a wonderful man and this is the best what has ever happened to me. I’ve never been as happy as during these last 14 years (neither is he, I believe :)!).
Gary Lee, you seem to not be able to keep your mouth shut when actually you should. Wondering why you are so interested to comment on all these coming out videos.
Bill Mason .....bill, you deserved the best too. You came out too late, why. I guess you missed most of the best. I came out three months after I got married. I did not want that life.....it stinks.
@@Herziful,Gary Lee is getting it from everyone!
@@agustindejesus7398 ,then why did you get married in the first place to a woman??? Just curious.
Jacob, thank you for your story. I came out as bi to my parents when I was 31 years old. What I remember is dead silence. Several months later I wanted to talk to my Mother about it and she said that she doesn't want to talk. My close friends are not bothered about my orientation. Most of my colleagues at work knew. Several years later all of them have moved on to other jobs so my present colleagues don't know except for my supervisors. I came out to one of my current colleagues a few weeks ago and to her it was blip on the screen. No big deal. High school was not fun for me. Nobody knew my orientation. I suspect some of my classmates knew. I did not anticipate that my comment would be so lengthy. Thank you Jacob.
You are loved.
We haven’t talked in forever, but I remember us being best friends when we were younger. And all I want to say is you’re so strong and I’m so frikken proud of you Jacob. Keep being you❤️ miss you!
Your comment made me smile. :-)
@Gary Lee He literally didnt talk about sex, not even once. The fact that you think you think you can desensitize the coming out experience by simply generalizing it as "butt sex" is rude and ignorant.
@Jacques Wieciech you know whats funny. Ive seen this asshat and his commentary on other videos like this. Hes literally a troll!
@Gary Lee Um...what?
@@masterlaughter4924 He's probably a closeted gay who hasn't been able to accept who he is.
I am gay and proud my family already knew that I was gay. When I told my sister I cried she says that I love you I don't care what you are. I hope that you have a good life you are so sweet to tell everyone about you story ❤️
I guarantee that in High School you weren’t the only one. Glad you are free from the shackles secrecy and fear place on people like us. Now you can live, love, laugh and be the man you were always meant to be.
Listening to your coming out story- when you shared that 22 people texted, you and your dad's friends started talking about you. I started to tear up. It brings me back to overcoming the "shame" I felt and the loneliness I experienced as I navigated my sexuality. I came out when I was 19 years old, and although people could guess that I was gay, I never came out and said it until I was 19. It was a bittersweet experience for me. My mother cried when I came out to her.
When I came out 40 years ago I couldn't even dream that there would be a time where people could come out to the world the way you have. When I see and hear stories like yours it helps me see how much the world has changed since my time of coming out. Have the life that I could only dream about, be happy (your kind of happy, no-one elses) and thanks for making an old queen happy for a moment.
Gregory Dewbery,we must be around the same age, this coming July 2020 My significant other and I will celebrate our 30th year together. Married 6 year's and I received a letter from Barrack Obama right after he legalized same sex marriage. I had wrote him ,Thanking him for doing so and he sent me a response. ❤
I'm so pleased you've come out. Your realizing that true friends don't care if your gay or not. I'm 62 and came out at 57. I grew up in a different time in rural Kansas. Coming out was the best thing I ever did. Only wish I could of come out at your age.
I'm out to my mum, little brother, big sister, 2 cousins, my aunt, and a few friends who were all accepting. I was also outed so this video resonated with me. Despite the fact that I am out to the persons who matter to me, and I'm at my most comfortable state in my life, I never stopped watching these videos because I love to hear different coming out stories. Thank you for sharing your story Jacob. You're incredible and I am looking forward to what's to come ❤❤❤
Everyone at my High School decided for me. They judged me and treated me accordingly. So I never got to become a social animal and hang out with friends because I didn't have any.
Nearly 30 years after graduating and I'm still haunted by the experience. I know only to well the mental health aspects you talk about.
Be grateful and appreciate that you are braver and stronger than you give yourself credit for.
This video just appeared in my timeline. I'm glad that it did. As an elder gay who has been out for over 23 years, I am so happy that you are happy. We all come to that place in our own time, but when we get there, it is truly amazing. Keep shining your light and blazing a trail for those that will follow you!
One thing I've learned in life is that when you are young, mostly during your high school and college years, you want to be liked and you worry about what people think about you. Then when you get to middle age.....your forties and fifties you don't care what they think......When you get to your seventies and eighties you discover they weren't thinking of you at all.
You're awkwardly cute and cool. I love that. ♡
He's so cute! This was a coming "OOT" story. All my Canadian friends, I miss you!
he looks like Madonna in 1984
Awkwardly? He is hot as hell! And nothing awkward about him!
@@tomdimartino7361 thanks I thought it was just me questioned that word.
@@eduardochavacano ha you mean she looks like him.
Thanks for sharing your story. I'm 58, and I remember just how difficult my own self-realization and coming out was...during a very different time in our world. Hearing you share your story is in itself a gift to others who come after you that "it's ok" and that there is an authentic life ahead. Aloha! Be Safe and Be Well! Alan
Hey Jacob! I love how you were able to be so insightful and sensitive in telling your story. You listened to your inner feelings and saved yourself a lifetime of self-loathing and depression. Be thankful you live at this point in history; the future is on your side ... and vice-versa.
sounds like you have the greatest best friend...the kind of guy that was so impacted by you coming out to him that he needed to process it for an hour but then (I'm guessing) still loved and cared for you afterwards
It's never easy to express for who you really are in this world because people will judge you, but at the end of the day it's you who know who you are. As long as you won't hurt anybody then feel free to be true to yourself and most important thing is ACCEPTANCE. So proud of you Jacob. Raise our flag 🌈 ☺️
Be happy that your first experience was a real, true, deep infatuation (“crush”) and that you felt heartbreak- I remember being exhilirated- it felt so exciting and so oh sooo right! - also clearly somebody did something right in raising you so that you could feel that in the first place with someone else- and you will be much less likely to fall into unhealthy relationships throughout your life. So It’s been like 4 years since you posted this, and I clicked and now am commenting-
so I hope you are doing amazingly well especially since you seem so down to earth and also because you are canadian (not gonna lie, my bias is real 😂)- and you’re totally someone I’d be attracted to- you fit my type - so there’s that
Similar story coming out it’s tougher growing up mixed race Islander & German(White) it’s tough my whole family & few friends disowned me and distanced themselves. I didn’t care much, as longs as I was happy and moved overseas for a better life and it’s been good so far!
William, those "friends" outed themselves as superficial and unreal. It is actually clarifying to find out the truth.
John Kimber I am human lol
John Kimber what ethnicity do I resemblance?
John Kimber Latino I wish
John Kimber 🙏🙏🙏
My attitude has always been that I don’t need anyone’s acceptance for who I decide to sleep with.I’ve had some members of my family suddenly change negatively towards me and I was like ‘Tough.Deal with it and get on with your own lives.Hate shouldn’t be hobby so get another one’.I’m happy.
Keeping the secret sucks the life out of you. Congratulations on being your authentic self.
Your story brought back my own memories from 30 years ago. Seems like yesterday. Thanks for sharing.
Enjoy your youth.
Jacob you are truly a terrific guy and someone your parents should be very proud of.
A bit of a roller coaster story. Some good and cute and funny and some not so good. The part about your best friend talking about you during his entire therapy session even though his gf of 4 years had just broken up with him was heartwarming to hear. Clearly your friendship was super important to him.
9:51 I completely get this. I've barely come out personally to most of the people in my school but bc i find the actual process of coming out to be very anxiety inducing and awkward. So after a few weeks of being out to my closest friends I told some of them that I trusted them to make a good judgement on who they thought would take my sexuality well and tell them. When I did this I said that it was ok for the people my friends told that they could also tell other people. I like this because it made it so that my coming out would spread relatively slowly in the beginning and then when I was a lot more comfortable and supported that I could let it go a lot more quickly and out of my control. Now i'm pretty sure all of my school year knows, but have know idea how many do or who they are. Because of this assumption that everyone knows i'm a lot more confident than I was. :)
I'm so happy for you. I came out of the closet to my parents a month ago. Every time I think about it gives me a form of peace that I hadn't felt in 13 years.
Anyone who doesn’t like you for you, is not the right person for you anyway. BOOM💥
Omg, It's Damon from "Damon and Jo"!
Easy said, translated it means, if your Mom doesn't like you, it's the wrong Mom for you. It means coming out can cause breakups. That is exactly what people fear. Now you try to comfort somebody with "breakup is good for your".
Blah blah blah blah
ist easy for somebody on the outside to say this when they haven't experienced what somebody is going through, and even if you have everyone handles things differently because everyone is different.
@@williamreed5528 yep I get it! After watching lord knows maybe 200 coming out stories and while there is a blah blah blah side to these stories they serve a critical purpose to the one telling the story, their friends and family and those who are still clueless that gay people even exist in truth! (Oh he isn't really gay, it's just a phase!) [denial mind set!] Best !!
It doesn't get more real and honest than this guy! I hope the happiest life for you!
Hlo can I have ur insta handle
Good for you. It sucks that so many people live their lives trying to please others. Or trying to hide who they really are just to cater to people's judgment. I wish you lots of happiness and love in your life 😄🌈
@Felix ,GOOD! Stay Strong and Stay Well from Philadelphia, Pa. Never look back!
Most handseome thing I've seen in a while...
he is not a thing, he is a person, but yes, I too would unreluctantly knibble on his ears
He is gay love sorry
that is sooo true!
ZL Productions I agree...he’s really stunning...look at those eyes! 😁❤️
@@SeanShimamoto ❤️❤️
It’s gonna be fine buddy. You’ll be fine. God bless.
I must be at least 15-20 years older than you, and the thing that struck me the most about your story is how it was almost precisely the same for me back in my university days. Some details were different of course, but I remember every single feeling you described like it was yesterday. On the one hand, it's always great to hear someone making this important journey. But on the other hand, it makes me a little sad to think things still haven't changed in all this time. I would've hoped by now people didn't have to go through the same crushing self doubt and fear of losing friends and family just because of who they are. Glad it's worked out well for you, you should be proud of yourself! :)
It's entertaining to hear positive coming out stories. It's also really important to hear them. Best to you Jacob.
Never heard of this kid in my life but omg that video was so sweet and he's adorable.
I feel like I am one of the only people here who does not actually know you. I found this video by googling "coming out" videos on youtube. I'm bisexual but definitely lean more to girls. I have a pretty conservative family but I'm trying to find courage in others, like you. I'm glad you were able to rise up out of being outed, someone in my past tried to out me (actually multiple times) but it's still with me. Wish you well my friend 🤟
Own your peace brother! Thank you for sharing. My mother passed when I was sixteen and I came out a year later. Not sure I could have come out to her, a super religious woman. However, she was the one human in my life to teach me to be true to myself. Thank you for sharing your story. Be strong!
From one Western grad to another, thank you for sharing this. It is a tough realization, no matter what. All the best. x
Thank you my little Canadian brother. You did a great job on your story and I'm so happy for you. You seem like a wonderful person and you'll make someone a very happy man. You'll be in my prayers.
My mother found out before I was ready to tell her and when she confronted me with it I remember feeling terrified.
Things got really ugly between us for a while but in hind sight it was the best thing to happen to me because I no longer had to carry the weight of my secret and I felt free. Even though she was angry. Even though she kicked me out of the house. Even though our relationship was strained, I felt so free and happy that none of that mattered.
So happy you’re in a healthy place in life. Thanks for sharing your story. :)
Hope things get better and better with you.Sorry that you weren’t accepted by your mom.Some parents don’t realize how fortunate they are to be blessed with kids.What really counts is that you are free and happy and not hiding who you are.Maybe she will realize what she did was wrong and if she doesn’t it’s her loss,not yours.Been in your shoes before so I know what it’s like being rejected by someone who’s supposed to love you unconditionally.
You have to remember that you are not going to give your parents grandchildren Say goodbye to the family legacy and the family name. So for some people that's very important. Grandchildren for a lot of people is the icing on the cake. I never got married because I never found the right woman. But I saw the expression on my parent's faces when my brother would stop by with his kids. They would lite up with joy when the grandchildren showed up. So I can understand when parents are not happy with their gay children.
So happy for you random stranger who appeared in my recommended! Being out has it's perks, even if you live in a small hick town
I was outed to my entire family by a football player (who I thought was a friend) who was upset because I did not want to “make out” with him (at the time I was dating his friend) This was my freshman year in HS back in 1999. It was my first betrayal experience .. it was heartbreaking.
Was it weird doing it in high school so young?
🤣🤣🤣🤣
@@mr-yy8sd are you kidding me harmon's.
@@mr-yy8sd Don't underestimate high school kids.
I always said "I have to live my normal, not everyone else's". Thanks for the story.
Good for you, Jacob! I hope you have a long, happy, and PROUD life! Congratulations!
I am gay and didn't come out until I was 29 years old and AFTER being married to a woman for 7 years. I have been with my husband for 31 years now and wish you all the happiness that I have found in my life. God bless you my friend !
I'm going to add to this because it's not always bad or sad when coming out. I'm a 66 year old man. My mother who I speak of was born in 1924 with a Catholic upbringing. I never thought of myself as coming out or being gay. We were told in those days many boys in their youth 'mess-about' with other boys and it's part of growing up and finding your sexuality. At some point a boy will move on to girls. So I waited and waited even thinking I was a 'late developer' and would get around to girls eventually. Dated the occasional girl at school but more because everyone else was. On leaving school at 16 I went to 'Men only' clubs and realised I wasn't going to change. By 17, I had my first love and when it ended I was crushed. I had no one to talk too properly and felt down and depressed. One day I was sitting in the livingroom and my Mother asked me what was wrong? At first I tried to deny anything but she insisted. Suddenly tears rolled down my face and I told her that I had loved a guy but it was now over and I missed him. She listened and we talked. She told me she would always be there if I needed to talk ever again. Later she told my sister who accepted me and when she married she told her husband who was equally open. When I asked her why she just said, she needed to know he was ok with it before she married him. I felt so much better knowing my parent knew but I never pushed the gay agenda to my mother or expected her to accept my gay lifestyle. I would never taking a guy back (except once or twice) or kiss a guy in front of her....wouldn't have done it with a girl either! She did meet my gay friends as well as the odd relationships or two and never judged me or them for being gay. Infact she got on so well with one of my exes that he use to visit her long after we were over, which was annoying for me! I never came out to my work colleagues because that's exactly what they were colleagues so not importent enough to come out too specificall, after all never did with my parent so why do it for them. But I never hid my lifestyle from them just never added the tag GAY. So I would tell them about my weekend as I went to a club danced all night with friends and me and xxx went back to mine at dawn, had breakfast and went to bed, we didn't wake until late Sundays! That's how I would describe my weekend if asked. I'm out to my family who can see me and my present relationship on my face book page should they want and his family are fantast. They are Spanish and I am older than his parents but they chat away with me in their broken English and I in my broken Spanish. Why because they know I care for their son and that's what counts to them. As it turned out my cousin who came from a religious upbringing has a daughter who is gay and lives in Australia with her wife and new baby. So things can and will change, being gay doesn't mean being alone or having a sad life. If I can have all of this during my life in an age of illegality for being homosexual, homophobia out and proud usually beating the shit out of some poor soul, clause 28 or whatever with Thatcher and Whitehouse. Then you must be able to with what's there today.
No one's business but our own what our sexuality is, yet people make it their business. I hope your story will encourage others.
I'm so fucking proud of you Dude! I've been out fo 2 years this month now. My best friend becomes more closer to me when I told him. He understood me. He is straight, has kid and family. He is so fucking supportive. It feels like heaven. I don't have any gay freinds.
And my coming was the best gift I've ever given to myself. But listen, no matter what you do, people has always something to say. So just do what you think makes you happy disregarding the approval of others. Just do it for yourself and fuck society! Be stronger and stronger. The world is squeezing us.
95% of my friends are straight and they were so supportive too! I’m glad you had a similar experience. You definitely feel a much stronger bond after coming out and it’s this stress that’s been removed finally.
@@BrandonNaatz yeah man you're amazing!💪💪💪
@@BrandonNaatz you're damn attractive too. So keep it up bro!💪
Proud of you! Take what’s rightfully yours. Your life, love and identity. I‘m one of those „typical“ mummies who knows her children better than they know themselves... just like i knew my son was gay wayyyy earlier then he outed himself to me. That was at the age of 18... now he‘s 27... i‘m proud of him like i‘m proud of all you guys living and loving your life because you only have this one life and because nobody should ever be afraid or ashamed of loving the person you want to love, no matter what! Make your life extraordinary, Jacob! I‘ll be cheering for ya... Greetings from Germany 🍀
Your mother should be very proud to have raised such a beautiful intelligent son. Wishing you a happy life. Btw you can still marry and have children. 💜
So happy for you. From my own experience, no gay guy regrets coming out of the closet.It's great to be free to be yourself.
I remember you from my Ohall experience and you were always such a nice guy! I am so happy you can live happier and in your truth :)
I love that the first time ever you came out, it was because you thought it wasn’t fair to your mom.❤ I respect people who love their own family. 😊 Wish I’d find someone like that one day.
Moms always seem to know, so did mine. Love her. Thanks for sharing your story with us. You teared me up twice, first with the story of you leaving your mom at the station, second the story of your friends supporting you. I‘m happy for you being out now. Take care (especially these times) and have fun.
Two important points:
1. In case of a stressful occurrence people - normal - may star to behave distinctively different usually they just back away from their usual behaviour and get less active and more distant. If anyone would ever observe such a change by a close person don’t become offended or resentful but be aware that something important has taken place and try to assist the person and give the person time to come out with that.
2. He said - as long as he had been closeted his self esteem has been limited and he has judged himself only by what other people have been thinking about him. After coming out he regained respect for himself and his self esteem has returned to its due place. It is true. If whoever judges himself by what other people say - be sure that that person wastes his life and means nothing. Is almost nothing. Never do it. Only temporarily if we need get back on track.
Overall - he is quite normal, not a haughty boy, quite sensitive and handsome. And full of energy. He is young still and he makes most of it now. Great. I would like to listen to his further stories !
I am happy for you. It is never easy to come out since we have to first come to terms with it ourselves. Keep being you and loving yourself.
I remember agonizing for 3 years living with my bf. I finally went home & asked her to sit down and I finally sed that I was gay. Without skipping a beat she just sed let's go out for breakfast. Felt like Mt Everest was lifted off my shoulders! I love you Mom! Rest in peace ❤
Amazing story. So proud of your courage and vulnerability. You’re a smart mature young man. I was exactly like you but ended up getting married and had kids and came out at 40. I don’t have any regrets because of my three amazing kids but no debate. Being out and authentic is the only Way to go. Congrats!
Your story resonates with me. It took me years to come out and even now that I am out, it still feels like I'm not out. Conservative family. Conservative country. Hate crimes. I love your story and wish I could speak to you to help me boost my confidence etc. I am still worried that people will find out and their reactions so I don't feel that I am me yet even though my family has known for about 8-9 years. It is not a subject we ever talk about. It's not like reality. I feel like I'm back in the closet. I need help to find me and be me
Hey how are you? I hope You are ok? I'm sorry to hear this, i am from Philippines it is the same here we don't talk about it but they know me for Who I am, I am just concern to my nephews and nieces to explain who I am just because my sisters teaching them to call their uncle gay and which is me.. so Kinda Feel awkward to be around with them... But what you feel is totally valid you just have to let it go.. As long as your support system are ok with you, you will be good
The hardest time we have in our life can become our biggest strength
I went through that period of anger too. Your story with your mom and the way you shared it was so … funny because I can only imagine how you felt in that moment and how relieved you must have been when she texted you the second time. Also, your ability to tell a story was so amazing, that I felt like you were sharing it with me. I hope your life is all it can be! Thanks for posting!
it took some time for me to come out. I came out when I was 26 only because my family thought my little brother was gay and I heard my mom say if one of my kids is gay I will kill myself. I know what it is like to be outed out by people who actually think they are important part of your life. They ruined that moment for me and that was suppose to my courage to come out to people that I loved but it wasn't, I will never get it back. I just defended my sexuality after that and moved to the city where people were accepting. didn't come back to my home town until 10 years time and came back stronger and didn't have to hide who I was and two of my nephews came out because they saw that I came out to my family. I look forward to seeing more posts. good job
The part I loved best was when you said you heard you mom say she would kill herself if you were gay. Typical Breeder guilt. You are gay so let them get over it. You aren't obliged to get over anything. If you parents taught you to love instead of hate they wouldn't have the problem not you.
Be yourself, mom understands and she will always love you... that's all that matters... may GOD BLESS you... it's a BEAUTIFUL world, make it yours...
I cant tell you on how proud of you on coming out!!! You are young but yet you are on the right path and direction.....I came out when I was 14 and it was tough for me. My parents took me to a shrink because she thought that it just was just a phase.....but it wasn't. She's has been happy for me ever since!
Be yourself, be honest to everyone including your family, and first and foremost be HAPPY and PROUD!!! There is a saying that goes......I dont care what you look on the outside, it is what is on the inside that counts. I AM proud of you on coming out and I salute you :)
So many parts of your story resonated with me. I too had a hard time accepting myself at first and tried to bury and tried to go as bi, but after a while, I couldn't ignore the fact that I'm a lesbian. I have been coming out to friends for almost 2 years now, but I didn't want to tell my family. But, like your mom, my mom knew and told my dad to get ready for it. She confronted me, and while the situation has been rocky for a while, they are finally starting to be more accepting. You are so brave for sharing your story online, thank you! ❤️
I'm a straight female but I'm watching coming out videos lol instead of studying. Good for you for coming out and being your true self. Hi from Ontario and damn, your Alberta accent is strong.
Jacob I went to a very small high school years back. Did the same thing when I went to UBC. Don't be surprised when you go to a school reunion to find out you were not the only one. What brings a smile to my face is the girls that told me they liked dating me as I was different than the rest of the guys as I was not always trying cop a feel.
I came out at the age of 42. My family don’t care. I wish I had know but then again you don’t know what their reaction will be. I’m happy!
Hi, Jacob. Thanks for sharing your story. Two things I got touched by in your narration: 1) The Magic. That feeling of when you are with a person, and you really you want to be with them, rather than those you were told you were supposed to like and be with, that is pure magic! and it's so heartwarming that you listened to your own wish/desire/heart and followed it. Be only with the ones you feel that magic. 2) Resilience. Although being outed is not the best way to start living your true self (I think it is violent -either on purpose or by accident) it was a big opportunity for you. Going through the overwhelming times, and finding ways to cope with the adversity, and after all that, coming out of the whole thing as a new, brave and happy person is almost the living meaning of resilience. I am sorry if this comment is too long. Greetings from Mexico!
There is a universal saying; "Your Mother is the first to know, last to find out"!
Jacob everything in your life only get better after you accept yourself. I'm 70 years old and I came out to my Parents when I was 17 years old. My Parents were very accepting in a day and age when it wasn't Socially Acceptable. I was a Jock of the 1st Order and no one ever even though that I was Gay. My Partner and I were together for over 40 year until his Death 7 years ago. He was my History Prof in College, I was 22 and he was 32. Life is Good and I wish you the best in the Years to come. Peace & Love Always. Jessiah
Super handsome. Love this story. Stay strong friend. Sending all the Positivity and love your way!
i came out over 30 yrs ago....best thing i ever done.....lets you see who your friends are and who to trust........live your life for you - dont let anything ever hold you back..........do what makes you happy.........most folk are transient in youre life so it doesnt really matter what they think,say or do.......concentrate on you and achieve everything you want.........and if youve a bf who isnt ever on the same page replace them immediately-dont think about it and delay...........shall i say more?
Really enjoyed your video. I came out decades ago at 33. My only regret is not doing so earlier. I watch coming out stories like yours once in awhile to see if the process is getting easier for our youth. Très fier de toi.
Dan Gagné Well it might have been good you didn't. I came out at 15. This was in the 90s. Didn't end good.
My partner came out at 15 also to crazy religious parents and that didn’t go well either. He moved out at 16 and still has a strained relationship with them almost 20yrs later.
Dan Gagné all religious written word, has been written by man! Many religions stem from judaism ✡️! The Koran doesn’t always get proper translation into English! There are compelling arguments against those commonly used phrases from the Bible “ Man shall not lie with man” etc.
Dan Gagné many of these religions didn’t exist until 1000 years after Christ died! Meanings of words change over time! In the English language to say I like that, instead people have said... that’s hot, that’s cool, that’s rad, it’s the bomb, it’s off the hook, it’s off the chain, that’s mad hot, that’s banging, countless other terms! So imagine trying to translate a book from 1000 years earlier from a different language!
Thank you Jacob for your candor and transparency. I think,cas a game man, outing others and passing on the news robs the gay person of control over how and when to come out to whom. And of course small towns are the worst for everybodybknowing your business. I'm 79 y.o. and it warms my heart that it is now possible for you to have everything you once dreamed of: marriage, children, a fog and white picket fence. You are such an important role model for other young gays who have not yet come out. Thank you for helping others in the gay world to imagine there is a good life after being outed.
So glad to hear you mentioning the emotional aspect to this. It's not just who you want to sleep with. I was super shy in high school so I'd just go out with any girl who expressed interest (only a few did, lol) and I figured "okay, this seems to work so... I guess I'm Bi?" Then in college I met a guy I clicked with and we started dating and it was like WHAM! - THIS is what it feels like to be in love. THIS is what I've been looking for. It wasn't until then that I really knew I was gay. :)
Jacob, I hope that you continued to have this bravery and comfort these past three years. Your attitude is/was contagious. Keep being positive and trusting of what you feel and know from within. Best wishes.
I am very proud of you for coming out as you did I know that it must have been very hard for you but you have done it good for you as you see, I am not last years chicken by any means I came out when I was in high school by mistake but I have no regrets today what so ever it wasn't easy back then but I have made and I am very happily married to a wonder full man we have been together for 29 years now and I have no reason not to believe we live like this until the end, I also have every reason to believe that one day you will meet someone also and have a great life together I wish all the best and God Bless and keep you. ❤️❤️❤️
Just be you Jacob ❤️ you seem like a lovely man. Life is way too short for being unhappy 🙁 and afraid of what others think of you. I know this from harsh reality. Shine and be you. Thank you for sharing ❤❤❤
Thank you so much. You are brave and don't be afraid anymore.. Have a wonderful life. Born in '43 it was a nightmare to be gay: except for a small minority we got it from everyone and every institution of society. You never forget.
I hope you always find the love, respect, and dignity you deserve. Always fight for these things. Be true to yourself, and the man that you love, and you will find the strength that you need. Also, follow your bliss.
Jacob, Thanks for sharing your story of coming out. I am so glad for you to have come so far and especially to share with others. Very well said. Thanks again and best wishes going forward.
Thanks for telling your story; and also for developing an early understanding of it’s not just about sex; claiming your authenticity is not an easy journey; take your own pace. Glad you’re finding being out positive. Hope you have a wonderful life.
Good story. And most especially good that you decided to simply live - and not fight living, your truth and to live IN your truth, g. All the best to you! 👍🏾
Hey Jacob! I really felt every word in this video, I’ve gone through a very similar journey of learning I need to be honest with myself and everyone I care about because pretending to be someone your not can really affect your mental health. I recently came out on Facebook a few months ago and I’ve never been happier! Feeling like I can be who I am proud to be means everything. Thank you for sharing your journey with us here I’m sure it has helped so many other ppl still struggling inside the closet. Btw you’re so f cute!!
Its crazy how different things have become, idk if its just that im in an accepting part of the world (California) or if its just different times but its way different in my highschool, like usually all the “gay” people are the most popular in my whole district and usually they are the ones winning prom king and homecoming king and stuff like that. And its kinda been like that for my whole school experience, like every since 1st grade, and its crazy to me hearing how different things were or are in the world.
Good that you're not wasting years trying to change something you didn't choose and that doesn't go away. The rational choice is to accept yourself as you are and live your life to the fullest. I hope you find someone to love and who will love you back in this life. You deserve it.
You be proud of you. You are a gift to the world. Thank you!!!
The most important person you have to come out to is yourself and sometimes this is most difficult step.
Awesome; I've never heard a story so similar to mine, but with a 40 year difference.
Jacob, thanks for your story. It is true, if we can't live as we are, or tell the people who love us who we are, it can easily cause pressure and disappointed that would eventually eat us away. I can feel that, sometimes I become very easily to get angry and really unhappy.
You appeared in my recommended feed. I said to myself let me watch. Dang! That was a story. Out of something bad something good came from it too. You have courage. You have strength. I still do not like how you outed, but I am glad you are out and living your best life. You stay happy and healthy. I will subscribe.
i am so terribly sorry for your experience and everything it may have caused you, but when i saw the thumbnail i was immediately compelled to comment how extraordinarily STUNNING and mesmerizing you are like? i know this is shallow and irrelevant but you're genuinely one of the most beautiful humans i've ever seen
also forgot to add that being out is the best feeling in the world. as you said it was meant to happen. much love to you
I can't even imagine how overwhelming that could be you really are strong
Jacob, SO pleased that you are out. Sorry that you were bragged out of the closet before you were ready to tell everyone. Such a Bad thing to happen to you. Be safe, be resilient!! Love your mom!!! Live your most authentic self!!! So proud of you!!!