As a fellow survivor of abuse from family. The victim blaming is monstrous. “Are you sure you were not at fault?”. Spoken like a narcissistic parent. They are strong women.
The worst thing besides the parent's treatment is how in the end, the rapist did not even get lawfully punished... I call THAT shameful on behalf of the court.
The ability of their parents to shut themselves off from their daughters intense pain is shocking. I don’t even know them and this tore me up inside. I hurt for them.
The mother seems to acknowledge and accept some responsibility for failing her daughters. She kept quiet, sat by her daughter and hugged her. I’m not condoning their behaviour and attitudes, but they’re relics of their culture and generation. Hopefully diversity will enlighten for the better, as diversity isn’t a magic wand.
Denial. He is separating himself from the responsibility, the shame, the dishonor, the pain, as he has done his entire life. You have to understand, he practiced this his entire life. And he is making no obvious decision to change, infact he stuck to his guns. I call that a failure of a man.
I am a white American woman who went through this too. My mom's 1st husband assaulted me every day from 3yrs old until my grandmother put a stop to it at 7yrs old. I owe my life to that woman as just before she discovered what was happening I needed reconstructive surgery from the severe damage he did. The Dr's said I would never have kids, hold my bowels or bladder and that I'd be lucky to walk. My strong grandmother chased him with a 3ft long shotgun trying to take his life. My mom told me we would not talk about it and just move on so I never got legal justice but he was caught after hurting the next girl and spent 25yrs in prison in TX. He's also on lifelong child sexual predator list and lifetime parole.
Danielle Nichols I am so sorry you had to go through something so evil you were just a innocent baby 😢 You’re a beautiful strong woman I wish you the best that life has in store for you 🥰 may all your dreams come true 🌹🌹 please God wrap your loving arms and protect this beautiful woman 🙏 🌹🌹
Imagine the horror of being 6 to 14 years old, and relatives from India start coming coming live in your house. And you are told that you must respect these people and all of them are above you, you do whatever they say. The parents really wronged these sisters
I was abused by my paternal and maternal uncles from the age of 7 or 8 up until I was 14 or 15. I had no idea what had happened to me. My mom did not even educate me about what a menstrual cycle is! When I finally told at 19, my father point blank blamed me! I am 42 now, living far away from everyone, at peace, but now and then feel abandoned watching the “family” on good terms, enjoying weddings and happy occasions. These ladies are lucky to have each other. I cried all through the conversation they had with their father, something I never did 😢
Same here. I have mad it a point to forgive and I have. I have kids now and I do NOT allow those individuals around them. I hope you are blessed with friends that are like family
I know this comment is a year old, but I hope you are having a wonderful life. Family is not blood, not for everyone. I hope you have a family of your own now, whether that be children, a spouse, or whatever means family to you. Blessings to you and your life. I hope that the future is infinitely bright for you.
As someone who is Punjabi Sikh, I can tell you that nothing has changed as far as cultural attitudes in our community are concerned. Not valuing a daughter’s worth and the cancerous mindset of “what will people say” still runs rife in our community. The fact that their father tried to suggest the daughters are to blame for what happened to them is a perfect example of the mindset of the elders in the community towards this kind of thing. Watching the part where the family were together and talking about what happened was heart breaking.
They move in extended family into their house. What do they expect? You move in relatives your kids do not know. Strangers. Then tell your girls these strangers are above you and can hit you and tell you what to do. Of course this might lead to molestation. It is the dads fault for bringing strangers into his home
@@Ibrahim-vr8rm I agree with you 100%. The mindset is that this kind of thing doesn’t happen with our families and if it does nobody dare talk about it, let alone address it because “what would people say”. The elder generation don’t realise the psychological damage their behaviour bestows upon their children. Three generations in this family alone that have been impacted by something that could have been stopped a long time before it stopped. We need to have open and honest conversations about abuse and how it can impact people. Some people just aren’t ready to accept that
Same for Far East Asian families as well. It is like unconditional love is a magical made up thing that only exists in Western fairytales. I refuse to raise my daughter like that.
@@unmellowyellow one thing that was so strange and made it hard to see where this documentary was going at the start, was how loving the girls are to their dad. Despite his mistreatment, him breaking one daughters wild spirit, him never looking his daughters in the eye, him not caring about how the court case is going. The daughters are so loving towards him. Reminisce about what he was like during their childhood. He treated them as less than because they are girls and they still love him unconditionally
@@Ibrahim-vr8rm I think on some level they were yearning for his love and validation. The one daughter said she wanted her father to make her feel protected and he just wasn’t able to do that. I suppose they probably feel like he’s still their father at the end of the day even though he completely neglected their needs and let them down. One of the daughters was even trying to justify why the father doesn’t show the daughters affection and does to the son. That’s where this toxicity gets to; you start to rationalise the absurd to bring some sanity to the situation I suppose. The preferential treatment of boys over girls really ticks me off. It’s such a backwards mentality, there would be no boys if it wasn’t for women. Until our community start to value women nothing will change.
My father has reacted in the exact same way. If anything he resents me more for speaking up on the abuse I faced because he’s scared the physical, emotional and financially abuse he put me through will be exposed aswell. It’s another way of suppressing my voice.
The father doesn’t comprehend that a pedophile or any predator doesn’t need to be ‘tempted’ it’s not the responsibility or sin of women. Women existing is not a reason to sexually use or abuse them. That’s the ‘cultural difference’ we are talking about. It’s not a woman’s responsibility to give you male children or take responsibility and blame for anything that a man feels. Men are NOT WORTH MORE THAN WOMEN. The brother is out of his lane defending the parents. He doesn’t get it either.
Well said. Only one sister seems strong and confident enough to challenge the parents. The sister sitting next to her looked terrified during the family meeting. Let’s hope attitudes and behaviours begin to change. More cultures are rejecting FGM, and foot binding is no longer practiced. So there is hope, but I trust it’s sooner rather than later. I also think women are second class citizens in every culture, even in the west. I’m a lone parent with grown children. Whenever I had work done on the house, tradesmen would always write the invoice to Mr…., even though I commissioned, instructed and paid them. They also hate women telling them what to do, even when we’re paying them thousands of pounds for the work.
The dad putting the responsibility on the 10 year old old made me really sad. I understand it's a cultural difference as well, but still broke my heart
It happens in the US with Caucasian families as well. My mother denied what her 2nd husband did to me & when he finally admitted he abused me, she blamed me & she let my brother’s daughter stay in her husband’s care unsupervised from age 3 yo and older. And yes he abused my niece for many years & was once caught & stopped from going into my 11 yo daughter’s bedroom at night. I had a lock put on my daughter’s bed room the next day & when my niece told me he abused her at age 18, I forbid my mother from ever bringing her husband into my house again. I now have no contact with them. Anyone who blames the child is just as bad as the abuser.
Its no longer just cultural…its widespread sexism and misogyny…it runs rampant in the US as well and i see it all the time when a young woman is abused. Victim blaming and shaming women in general is very common sadly.
@@jevelwilson that's horrid. That that is your journey in life is hard to understand for someone with no experience with that type of trauma. We all have our traumas but geez I'm so sorry you went through that.
@@truet6400 yes is was a horrible childhood which still effects me at 53. I just found out a year ago that my mother “stole” my brother & I away from our father & refused to let him see us after he drive 6 hours on 2 separate occasions. She then told us our whole life that he never wanted to see us & that he had “threatened” her that if she divorced him he would never see us again. I know know all of that was a lie to keep us from trying to look for him when we became adults and it almost worked. I did see my father once when I was about 37 or 38, but no one had told me the truth so I was very nervous and still wrongly believed he had never wanted to see us. Growing up with sexual abuse by 1 parental figure (adopted father) and emotional & mental abuse by my mother, thinking I was abandoned by my real father & my mother frequently telling me she wanted to run away, disappear & never come back caused me to have CPTSD, anxiety, depression & attachment disorder so bad I don’t know how to have any type of normal relationships at all. And I was born with a painful genetic condition called Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome & many of the co morbidities. My mother would actually make fun of me and snicker when I was very young and told her I was in pain. She never took me to the Dr. I was finally diagnosed last year after waiting 3 years to see a geneticist. I’m disabled because the Ehlers-Danlos & comorbidities are so bad. I cut all contact with her & her husband 6 months ago and the rest of the family is psychologically manipulated by her, it a but like Stockholm Syndrome & they all support her & have cut contact with me saying I am the “problem” because I have not forgiven them. It is really messed up more than I can write in comments. I’ve had “friends” judge me even though they saw some of the verbal & emotional abuse because they cannot understand that that severe abuse effects someone the test of their life. Even years of therapy & medications do mot erase or make the results of the abuse go away. I cannot understand what it is like to have had typical/average parents. I find it a little hard to believe that there are health families.
In Germany few years ago, a 14 year old girl was raped by her uncle. Her father blamed her and the family decided the girl is a shame for the father’s honor. At evening meal the whole family was together and they killed the girl and throw her body in a wast container. When it came out, they said the youngest son - at that time 15 years old - did it. Thanks heavens the judge don’t believe and send all - the father and two older brothers in prison.when I think, I had to watch how my girl was killed, I don‘t know, if the father had survived it. Nobody blamed the uncle, he was still a honorable member of the family. But he also went in prison for raping the girl.
Ooof this was a tearjerker. Tough to watch, especially when they sat down with the whole family and addressed their parents. I'm so glad the sisters have each other to learn on and to understand each other's hurt and anger. I pray they heal and get the continued support and love they so deserve and need. I am appalled that their abuser may potentially get off legally, but they definitely sent a strong message loud and clear that they are strong and stand for what's right, and they let everyone know how wrong he and his abuse was. Much love to these beautiful ladies❤️
Thank-you for sharing this. I was sexually assaulted by my older brother (6 years older), for about 2 years. I am 69 and still have been blamed by my siblings for what happened. It is healing for me to hear your experience and journey to healing.
Thank you for sharing this. I am a Punjabi male born in the 80’s and was not sure what to expect from this incredibly well made documentary. Unfortunately I’m disappointed with the parent reaction and…that’s a common reaction from both parents when they have to deal with that sort of issue/confrontation. VERY Well made! ❤
I was 14yrs old when I confessed to my school counsellor that my stepfather was behaving sexually inappropriately towards me. It set of a reaction of hatred from my mother and stepdad. However it gave my 2 older sisters who were 20 & 16 the courage to approach the police and confess the years of sexual abuse they had suffered by our stepfather..he was convicted and sentenced to jail. My sisters and I now have 14 children and 11 grandchildren between us and have with the right tools openly educated awareness of sexual abuse and inappropriate behaviors that they may encounter at anytime by anyone and have encouraged them all male and female to seek a trusted person to confide these wrongdoings too until it is exposed,justice imposed and healing for the victim can begin. Breaking the cycle of abuse is the most heroic life changing and courageous act one can do to save innocent souls from heartache,trauma and torment.
Commenting a year later just to say, I am so so happy for you and your sisters. It took so much courage for a little girl to speak up, I know what it's like. You are a strong and amazing person. I hope your life continues to be blessed.
If you were my sisters I would have confronted him and might have done some severe damage to him. I had male cousin who tried to assault me one evening. I stopped it in time.I informed my parents they showed me no support. It Was swept it under the rug.I hold them to much anger to this day. Girls you are brave . Much LOVE and prayers for healing..
The jerk of a dad was sill blaming her. He told her she was responsible, but he NEVER acknowledged that HE was the one who should have been responsible. He NEVER acknowledged the fact that he completely failed to protect his daughters. How shameful that he was such a failure and such a coward.
It took so much courage for you women to stand up I did the same in 1983 at the age of 14. With thr help of the police charges were pressed and he my grandfather got a very small amount of jail time for 7 years of sa. I ultimately lost my entire family but the word of how unacceptable this is must come out. We need to support each other
When the daughter cried about her Mom not being the best Mom to her, it hit home. My Mom was a victim of SA at a very young age. It sent her on a path to a hard life of many situations that left her a broken person. Her Mother had also been a victim and both were unstable Mom's. They have both passed away and I realize their lives were so broken by the abuse they survived as children. I chose not to have children because I realized I am broken and I refuse to have children born to suffer.
I'm super proud that these women were able to come out and expose that monster. Also, the fact that they were able to heal themselves because of that bond they have between them. Lots of love 💕 and always keep your chin up.
When her father said that her 10 year old self was to blame, that damn conversation would have been OVER AND I would have had him charged as an accessory after the fact or sued him civilly. What a horrifying situation!
Unreal. These women did not get the justice they so clearly deserve. Ladies - I wish I could look each of you in the eye and give you a hug. You have tremendous strength and support in each other. Don’t lose sight of that and learn from your parents mistakes. Good for you for saying to your parents what you have held in for so many years. I will keep you in my thoughts and wish you nothing but health, happiness and strength. Be kind to yourselves and each other
WOW! I cried through this whole video. Even though I am not South Asian my story seems to parallel. These three sisters are the most beautiful and brave women!.... my story was me being sexually abused at 5 years old by a 16 year old male cousin. I did not tell my mother until I was 32 years old and the first thing she said to me was " Don't tell your dad"..... this crushed me. She valued his feelings over mine because it was her side of the family and she knew my father would blame her. Needless to say I can relate to the survivor pain in not having supportive family. My children grew up with a very hypersensitive mother and knew that their private parts were only theirs to be touched. I forgive my mother for her ignorance but it is hard. Thank you so much for this documentary.....sexual abuse knows no culture, religion or social status. People that are brave enough to challenge these crimes are the only way to protect our future children. Thank you again and I hope you have found healing.
The sisters said their Dad would tell them not to sit next to this cousin. This was before he knew about the abuse. The dad could tell something was going on. Instead of investigating further, he puts the responsibility on his daughters. He was telling them before he was told about the abuse.
I agree with you. But he will use the fact that he told them prior as a warning and view the outcome as disobedience. It's so sad- the ignorance. Someone has to break the cycle- in this case, it's the sisters. They are the true heroes and ultimately they saved future generations, what her father and mother are INCAPABLE of doing so.
Or maybe he already had history of abuse and the dad knew it therefore tried to “warn” them. I find that most men can spot a pervert or bad man fairly easily and will warn others to stay away from them so its pretty shocking to me that the dad basically turned against his daughters smh. Most men are very protective of their daughters. But at the same time misogyny runs really deep in this world. Nothing surprises me that much anymore sadly.
Born and brought up in Punjab, a sikh girl , I am very grateful to my parents especially my father who raised me like his elder son ! Not only he gave me best education , best upbringing and taught me on how to live a dignified independent life ! “You cannot do this because you are a girl” I never heard this in my life , as I heard from my friends this is what their parents told them. I hope i have a daughter too, so I raise her the same way as I was raised.
Those three women are incredibly strong and brave. Fighting for what is right, for justice and first and foremost for such a horrible crime to not happen to other girls. They not only fight against their abuser, but against people looking away, a culture looking away, their own parents looking away. I wish them all the best, I wish them to heal and recover. To me, by starting to fight, they stopped being victims and turned in to survivers and heroines.
That's not what she said. She said "only 1% of women make it to where we've made it". Verdict. Please tell me what the difference is between what she said and what you typed.
@@blakejameson1114 it’s not because there’s a lack of sexual abuse. It’s because the vast majority of sexual assault goes unreported because most women fear not being believed and/or retribution (nearly 90% of all incidents in the US as an example). Then of that already small amount, a fraction are actually charged, and even less are brought to trial. I guess what I’m trying to say is… why are you arguing semantics on the societal degradation of women? Is it because you’re a misogynist?
@@blakejameson1114 sorry, I already graduated law school and don’t need to be quizzed by some random man on the internet who wants to play word games and downplay the adversities faced by women of color. And honestly there is no substantive difference, only 1% of cases do make it that far, largely because of the societal and institutional hurdles women face (not because Canada is notorious for back room plea deals).
My 50 years of carrying my secret ended with this amazing story of survival, thank you and may God bless you forward, please forgive your parents and accept Mom apology, sister’s emotions was so well captured, God bless you all!
"We are daughters, we are not wanted anyway" - unfortunately so many women in the South Asian community can relate to this comment. Brilliant documentary. The women should be extremely proud of themselves ❤️
this is so emotional. the sisters are so brave for confronting their parents about the incident. you can wonder how many girls were sexually harassed by the people in their own home and can't help but choose to remain silent. imagine they were just children when it happened. i can feel the fear and the pain and how it continues to be there even when u grow up.
The confrontation with the parents was so much more respectful than I could have ever been. I , too, was raised in a home where my opinions didn't matter, where I wasn't protected, and big feelings (or speaking out) were considered unacceptable for the children. Problems and conflicts were swept under the rug. The trauma still haunts me. Blessings and respect to all of the sisters 💗 Y'all have not only helped yourselves, but you set a great example and make the world a better place.
Initially I cried buckets full but as i watched on in horror heartbroken. My tears turned to anger & than finally i felt some relief towards the end. So proud of you all for showing the world what REAL STRONG WOMEN are capable of. I am sure you've helped so many young girls/women across the globe that abuse in any form be it mental, physical or sexual will NOT be tolerated ever.! God bless you all. 🙏🏼
If only the parents could see what we see? 3 beautiful, brave, strong outstanding women. I’m truly in awe of them. Where they have found the strength to fight back against everything, I’ll never know. I’m so proud of them. Justice will happen for them ❤
Why his name is not published for community to be aware?? He’s still living his best among other children and young women.. if court did nothing at least we can do is make sure we stay far away and keep other away from him…
I was brought up in western culture but had similar experiences. Told that I was the one that was wrong as I liked him… I was 5 yrs old and he was a friend of the family, at least 25ish. I liked alot of my parents friends but didnt mean they could do those things to me. Although this has brought back many unwanted memories , I applaud you all for being so brave. ❤️
Very similar story of mine but it was my own mother blaming me for her family being torn apart because the man who did it and went to jail was also one of her children.
OMG🥺💔I am so very Sorry this happened to you ladies. Know that you have the support of others like me and we thank you for having the strength to tell your story, it gives other women strength to also share their story💖
Some people don’t deserve to have children. And the brother who was raised in the western culture didn’t have the balls to stand up for his sister either, he has no excuses, he just enjoys being the favorite just because he’s a guy.
You see that in “so called” black cultures around the world. Black women are praised for being strong, but that trope isn’t a compliment. It’s justifying the neglect, abuse and mistreatment of black women. Many black women are strong, because we have no choice. We don’t have a collective group of men who provide for us and protect us and our children.
@@claudiaargueta3767it is through all cultures that women are emotionally stronger, honest and courageous. So many men lack a backbone and move from woman to woman for fear of being alone with a vessel to empty into in all ways!!
Both parents were so wrong, they should have put there own daughters 1st and protected them, instead they were treated in ridiculous outdated male dominated cruel way. The father is spineless weak man, my dad would have chased the preditor and dealt with him. All the females treated like slaves, no eye contact how appalling. My heart goes out to the brave women, how can men blame their own innocent little vulnerable girls, its so sickening, the mother didnt protect them, saying dont tell anyone.... shameful.
cnt believe a spinless father blaming 10 year old daughter and asking them to stay away, and tht person who did wrong to his daughter never even confronted one time let alone being lawfully punished.If a child is not safe with her parents then what is the safe place for them?
Heartbreaking! I'd like to know why women are so looked down upon. Who do the men think will have their children if no woman is involved? To blame an innocent child in any way is just down right evil. I applaud these lovely, beautiful women. Sisters staying strong together. It hurts so much to not have the support of family. My prayers go out to all the women going through such horror. My heart is with you.
Lost for words that the father told his 3 daughters that they are also responsible for the abuse that was taking place in their home. My heart breaks that people still think this way.
It appears the girls were not suported by the parents which is more hurtful, the parents were more worried about what society will thimk - a big fail from both mum and dad
53:51 I can honestly understand her here. I am literally in the same space. I'm in my 30s, never dated or had a bf. The feeling of anyone getting physically close to me is crippling. I may like a guy but will never say anything. The moment any guy comes at me with any emotion, it's like an automatic switch and I immediately cannot stand them. I mentally cannot get out of this no matter how hard I try. It's debilitating and depressing.
I'm from Philippines and we used to live in a house with extended family staying with us ,my mom said that they can discipline me and my sister. She gave them right to hit us if they have to. My sister is naughtier than me so she gets hit most of the time. It's sad I thought it was ok then bcuz they are family also. But I'm a mom now and I always always say Nobody can hit my kids, please!.
Sending much love to the sisters, I’m just sorry you did not receive the help and support you so deserved as a child, from your parents, and now I feel a huge let down by the legal system. What a strong bond you girls have ❤
I admire you, girls, so much. Your story has touched me a lot and it also has been really triggering. I hope you guys can heal slowly, but steadily. It’s definitely not easy, but that’s the goal. I am giving advice I don’t follow, but, please, keep being this vocal and protect your own ALWAYS. I love you. From the bottom of my heart. I hate using this word with victims of sexual abuse (any word depicted strength), but you guys are literally warriors. Confronting your parents this way knowing it can also be triggering is… I fully support you, appreciate you and love you ❤️. I am proud of you 🤍. Sending each one of you a BIG virtual hug 🫂❤️.
All 3 lady are absolutely beautiful and I understand completely what they went thru! Happened when I was 5,6,7. Cps took me away....happened again in fostercare...3 different foster homes..then got adopted! But I live with what happened to me every single day of my life. The ones who were suppose to protect me didnt....I can't explain how that feels! Like no one in the world loves me or could love me...I understand ladys. I pray God shines his love in yall and that one day we all will be healed!
How could her husband think she wasn’t pretty?? He must’ve been lying to mentally oppress her - to keep her from realizing her worth. Otherwise, why say such a thing even if you believed that? Even if you were marrying for a passport, and dumb with bad eyesight and crap opinions and no taste. What a complete waste he was. She is beautiful and when she was young she was stunning. That’s so sad. Regardless, even if she had not been: She deserved a marriage of love. ❤
That man was truly disgusting to say that to her. I suspect his motive was to destroy all her self confidence. I simply couldn’t fathom being with a man who didn’t consider me to be beautiful. What she point in a relationship like that.
How sad. The fact that even now, after all these years, their dad can't accept responsibility for bringing a sexual predator into their home. And the mom is even more responsible. The brother is a joke. Its very telling that he says one thing, but his eyes speak another. These woman were wronged, by their parents, their family, their traditions, and thier govt.
Asian mentality ( we are taught that extended family is just like close family) is to make their family and their culture closer to their children in foreign countries so their children don't miss real , clean , religious and values of their cultures. 😢
... that their mum principally speaks Punjabi, after spending the lion's share of her adult life in Canada, pretty well says it all .. as for inviting her family to join them? She did what was expected of her; nothing more, nothing less ...basically, she brought India to Canada, so why come to Canada?
So many emotions here. 😪 The sisters are incredible, I could not be more proud of them. The rest? I will let silence speak for me. The absolute most crushing aspect of this? The last couple of paragraphs. I am unable to accept a rule of law that lets a rapist go free BECAUSE HE WAS NOT TRIED SOON ENOUGH. I feel sick. To the sisters, the husband, her daughters.....my utmost love and respect.
I cried when she sat on that couch pouring her heart out her parents and her dad just sat there and didn't even get up to hug them . what the he'll is wrong with him. I
Oh God bless all of you. I hear you, I too was abused but by my uncle’s friend. They stayed in our home for a weekend and his friend abused me. I didn’t tell my Mummy for years. I’m married now, I told my husband of the abuse, we have a daughter, she’s 21 this year and we’re so protective over her. Our daughter is our life, we’d die for her. You ladies are amazing and so strong. 💪🏻🥰❤️❤️❤️❤️
I salute these brave woman who stood up for themselves against everyone who did them wrong. I can say by experience that this still goes on in year 2024 and I am not sure if it will ever end. But what we can do is stand up for yourself and protect all the Innocent boys and girls around us by speaking up. Again, thank you for sharing this and I wish you all the peace, love and rest you need to continue your life.
These girls are brave to speak up, this kind of abuse needs to stop, we do not have to punish our daughters just because what people will say. I wish these sisters well.
Beautiful brave women. Thank god they have each other. The parents are like stones sitting there with no compasión or remorse. So arrogant is the father he has to blame his own daughters. No wonder women don’t want to go to court. I can’t believe he got off with his vile crimes. How could he get off when three girls were victims. Shocking
I give these sisters all the credit in the world for speaking out against these kind of odds. I can't understand the fixation on boys. In order for your family to grow there must be daughters. In this culture they do everything for these men and they still don't want women. I hope their view of women changes.
You are all so brave for sharing your stories especially reminding us how Punjabi women are strong. Experiencing abuse does not make the abused any less strong and you women choose strength over and over again. You should be proud for how you parent and live your all your girls. so much unlearning has to take place so we can enjoy the beautiful parts of being Punjabi. Thank you for helping a Punjabi sister see and learn from you,
My life isn’t much different to what these beautiful strong went through. I faced, physical, emotional and financial abuse from my family. The abuse I’ve suppressed that. Some days I surprise myself that I’m strong enough to be still alive. To anyone facing this abuse, you owe your family nothing. The biggest regret I will ever have is never making those who abused me accountable. I mean my own family told me that if I told anyone, no one will believe you.
I applaud the strength and courage these ladies have shown . It's sad when technical loopholes in laws let such monsters slip away but I pray for their triumph and for their healing from this trauma. Only they know how they have suffered. Much love to all three of them❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Sorry but the brother should know better rather than sticking up for the parents. They are in the wrong. Your daughter's just needed a hug and a shoulder to cry on and be listened to.
Brave women ❤️ As a survivor also within an Asian family, I understand how difficult it may be for the parents to know how to respond. I feel like there needs to be some sort of mediation from a third party in such instances to help bridge the gap.
Heart breaking xx cause they will never get that childhood back.They were robbed of their childhood and teenage years xx xx So brave to challenge this person after all these years.Hopefully will inspire others to come forward and stop the abuse in any family setting xx xx my heart aches for you xx xx xx
A lot of things about the dynamics in the family seem strange. Things like the mother bringing her whole family over, the girls being the lowest in the hierarchy despite it being theirs father's house, them not looking their dad in the eye etc. All this is the norm in South Asian culture. Girls are just a burden who will be married off at some point from 14 to their 20s. A boy is like a king compared to the girls. It is common to live in what are called joint families. Living with cousins, aunts, uncles, nieces and nephews. The children then have to give huge amounts of "respect" to these relatives. It was these sisters own father's household yet they were the lowest on the hierarchy All this makes it easy for a predator to abuse children
I think with all sexual abuse the abusers prey on young females or males but they forget these victims grow up and tell their stories and it’s devastating how broken and they are and how it affects their whole lives 😢😢
You all are so brave! Thank God you had each other. For sure, out there, you helped other children in the same situation, unfortunately. Thank you for sharing this painful experience if us all. God bless you, sister
Gosh, I commend these women for sharing their story. And their strength to fight back. Not only against their predator, but also their family, mainly their father. What happened was incredibly wrong, and no victim should have to “take responsibility for their part.” Especially children! I hope with all my being those charges stood, and that man is held accountable for his heinous behavior.
Here 3 women turned in to STRONG amazing people and the very best of mothers but that does not excuse or condone the abuse they suffered for them to become that! But their daughters are so amazingly blessed to have Women this strong in morals and abilities to protect them and teach them right. This is what strong women look like. But they should NEVER have to endure abuse of any sort to become the beautiful blossoms they are.
As a fellow survivor of abuse from family. The victim blaming is monstrous. “Are you sure you were not at fault?”. Spoken like a narcissistic parent. They are strong women.
The worst thing besides the parent's treatment is how in the end, the rapist did not even get lawfully punished... I call THAT shameful on behalf of the court.
The ability of their parents to shut themselves off from their daughters intense pain is shocking. I don’t even know them and this tore me up inside. I hurt for them.
The mother seems to acknowledge and accept some responsibility for failing her daughters. She kept quiet, sat by her daughter and hugged her.
I’m not condoning their behaviour and attitudes, but they’re relics of their culture and generation. Hopefully diversity will enlighten for the better, as diversity isn’t a magic wand.
Denial. He is separating himself from the responsibility, the shame, the dishonor, the pain, as he has done his entire life. You have to understand, he practiced this his entire life. And he is making no obvious decision to change, infact he stuck to his guns. I call that a failure of a man.
I am a white American woman who went through this too. My mom's 1st husband assaulted me every day from 3yrs old until my grandmother put a stop to it at 7yrs old. I owe my life to that woman as just before she discovered what was happening I needed reconstructive surgery from the severe damage he did. The Dr's said I would never have kids, hold my bowels or bladder and that I'd be lucky to walk. My strong grandmother chased him with a 3ft long shotgun trying to take his life. My mom told me we would not talk about it and just move on so I never got legal justice but he was caught after hurting the next girl and spent 25yrs in prison in TX. He's also on lifelong child sexual predator list and lifetime parole.
Danielle Nichols I am so sorry you had to go through something so evil you were just a innocent baby 😢 You’re a beautiful strong woman I wish you the best that life has in store for you 🥰 may all your dreams come true 🌹🌹 please God wrap your loving arms and protect this beautiful woman 🙏 🌹🌹
DN, wishing you all the best, what an evil man!!! How are you recovering physically. Imagine being lucky that you can walk. Please reply to me.
I am sososo sorry honey. I hope youre better now. I'm so sorry dear
Bless
God bless your grandmother for believing you and saving your life
Imagine the horror of being 6 to 14 years old, and relatives from India start coming coming live in your house. And you are told that you must respect these people and all of them are above you, you do whatever they say. The parents really wronged these sisters
I was abused by my paternal and maternal uncles from the age of 7 or 8 up until I was 14 or 15. I had no idea what had happened to me. My mom did not even educate me about what a menstrual cycle is! When I finally told at 19, my father point blank blamed me! I am 42 now, living far away from everyone, at peace, but now and then feel abandoned watching the “family” on good terms, enjoying weddings and happy occasions. These ladies are lucky to have each other. I cried all through the conversation they had with their father, something I never did 😢
Same here. I have mad it a point to forgive and I have. I have kids now and I do NOT allow those individuals around them. I hope you are blessed with friends that are like family
I'm sorry you've been through all this. You're very strong to have overcome it alone. I hope you heal and be happy ❤️❤️❤️ sending you love 💕
I know hiding away from people who have neglected you is very painful... I'm in the same boat 😢
you do not need these evil people. i'm so sorry, wishing you sm healing and peace
I know this comment is a year old, but I hope you are having a wonderful life. Family is not blood, not for everyone. I hope you have a family of your own now, whether that be children, a spouse, or whatever means family to you. Blessings to you and your life. I hope that the future is infinitely bright for you.
As someone who is Punjabi Sikh, I can tell you that nothing has changed as far as cultural attitudes in our community are concerned. Not valuing a daughter’s worth and the cancerous mindset of “what will people say” still runs rife in our community. The fact that their father tried to suggest the daughters are to blame for what happened to them is a perfect example of the mindset of the elders in the community towards this kind of thing. Watching the part where the family were together and talking about what happened was heart breaking.
They move in extended family into their house. What do they expect? You move in relatives your kids do not know. Strangers. Then tell your girls these strangers are above you and can hit you and tell you what to do. Of course this might lead to molestation. It is the dads fault for bringing strangers into his home
@@Ibrahim-vr8rm I agree with you 100%. The mindset is that this kind of thing doesn’t happen with our families and if it does nobody dare talk about it, let alone address it because “what would people say”. The elder generation don’t realise the psychological damage their behaviour bestows upon their children. Three generations in this family alone that have been impacted by something that could have been stopped a long time before it stopped. We need to have open and honest conversations about abuse and how it can impact people. Some people just aren’t ready to accept that
Same for Far East Asian families as well. It is like unconditional love is a magical made up thing that only exists in Western fairytales. I refuse to raise my daughter like that.
@@unmellowyellow one thing that was so strange and made it hard to see where this documentary was going at the start, was how loving the girls are to their dad. Despite his mistreatment, him breaking one daughters wild spirit, him never looking his daughters in the eye, him not caring about how the court case is going. The daughters are so loving towards him. Reminisce about what he was like during their childhood. He treated them as less than because they are girls and they still love him unconditionally
@@Ibrahim-vr8rm I think on some level they were yearning for his love and validation. The one daughter said she wanted her father to make her feel protected and he just wasn’t able to do that. I suppose they probably feel like he’s still their father at the end of the day even though he completely neglected their needs and let them down. One of the daughters was even trying to justify why the father doesn’t show the daughters affection and does to the son. That’s where this toxicity gets to; you start to rationalise the absurd to bring some sanity to the situation I suppose. The preferential treatment of boys over girls really ticks me off. It’s such a backwards mentality, there would be no boys if it wasn’t for women. Until our community start to value women nothing will change.
These poor women have PTSD. Such courage bless them. They didn't even get get justice - totally maddening.
you can see that the dad had no remorse over his actions even till the end. That is the power of male patriachy.
My father has reacted in the exact same way. If anything he resents me more for speaking up on the abuse I faced because he’s scared the physical, emotional and financially abuse he put me through will be exposed aswell. It’s another way of suppressing my voice.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂🎉😂😂@@deep6055
@@deep6055🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🌹
The father doesn’t comprehend that a pedophile or any predator doesn’t need to be ‘tempted’ it’s not the responsibility or sin of women. Women existing is not a reason to sexually use or abuse them. That’s the ‘cultural difference’ we are talking about. It’s not a woman’s responsibility to give you male children or take responsibility and blame for anything that a man feels. Men are NOT WORTH MORE THAN WOMEN. The brother is out of his lane defending the parents. He doesn’t get it either.
Well said. Only one sister seems strong and confident enough to challenge the parents. The sister sitting next to her looked terrified during the family meeting.
Let’s hope attitudes and behaviours begin to change. More cultures are rejecting FGM, and foot binding is no longer practiced. So there is hope, but I trust it’s sooner rather than later.
I also think women are second class citizens in every culture, even in the west. I’m a lone parent with grown children. Whenever I had work done on the house, tradesmen would always write the invoice to Mr…., even though I commissioned, instructed and paid them. They also hate women telling them what to do, even when we’re paying them thousands of pounds for the work.
It's unlawful in the religion to see your child in that manner, too.
The dad putting the responsibility on the 10 year old old made me really sad. I understand it's a cultural difference as well, but still broke my heart
It happens in the US with Caucasian families as well.
My mother denied what her 2nd husband did to me & when he finally admitted he abused me, she blamed me & she let my brother’s daughter stay in her husband’s care unsupervised from age 3 yo and older. And yes he abused my niece for many years & was once caught & stopped from going into my 11 yo daughter’s bedroom at night. I had a lock put on my daughter’s bed room the next day & when my niece told me he abused her at age 18, I forbid my mother from ever bringing her husband into my house again.
I now have no contact with them.
Anyone who blames the child is just as bad as the abuser.
Its no longer just cultural…its widespread sexism and misogyny…it runs rampant in the US as well and i see it all the time when a young woman is abused. Victim blaming and shaming women in general is very common sadly.
@@jevelwilson that's horrid. That that is your journey in life is hard to understand for someone with no experience with that type of trauma. We all have our traumas but geez I'm so sorry you went through that.
@@truet6400 yes is was a horrible childhood which still effects me at 53. I just found out a year ago that my mother “stole” my brother & I away from our father & refused to let him see us after he drive 6 hours on 2 separate occasions. She then told us our whole life that he never wanted to see us & that he had “threatened” her that if she divorced him he would never see us again. I know know all of that was a lie to keep us from trying to look for him when we became adults and it almost worked.
I did see my father once when I was about 37 or 38, but no one had told me the truth so I was very nervous and still wrongly believed he had never wanted to see us.
Growing up with sexual abuse by 1 parental figure (adopted father) and emotional & mental abuse by my mother, thinking I was abandoned by my real father & my mother frequently telling me she wanted to run away, disappear & never come back caused me to have CPTSD, anxiety, depression & attachment disorder so bad I don’t know how to have any type of normal relationships at all.
And I was born with a painful genetic condition called Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome & many of the co morbidities.
My mother would actually make fun of me and snicker when I was very young and told her I was in pain. She never took me to the Dr.
I was finally diagnosed last year after waiting 3 years to see a geneticist. I’m disabled because the Ehlers-Danlos & comorbidities are so bad.
I cut all contact with her & her husband 6 months ago and the rest of the family is psychologically manipulated by her, it a but like Stockholm Syndrome & they all support her & have cut contact with me saying I am the “problem” because I have not forgiven them.
It is really messed up more than I can write in comments.
I’ve had “friends” judge me even though they saw some of the verbal & emotional abuse because they cannot understand that that severe abuse effects someone the test of their life. Even years of therapy & medications do mot erase or make the results of the abuse go away.
I cannot understand what it is like to have had typical/average parents. I find it a little hard to believe that there are health families.
In Germany few years ago, a 14 year old girl was raped by her uncle. Her father blamed her and the family decided the girl is a shame for the father’s honor. At evening meal the whole family was together and they killed the girl and throw her body in a wast container. When it came out, they said the youngest son - at that time 15 years old - did it. Thanks heavens the judge don’t believe and send all - the father and two older brothers in prison.when I think, I had to watch how my girl was killed, I don‘t know, if the father had survived it. Nobody blamed the uncle, he was still a honorable member of the family. But he also went in prison for raping the girl.
Father is a spineless man who couldn’t protect his daughters and putting the blame on them.
Typical Asian man
Let’s be real you and me both know our community hides the perpetrators of abuse. Survivors voices are always suppresed.
Sometimes, mothers are also blamed as they have not successfully brainwashed their daughters in accepting the abuse and not to complain
Well said.
Ooof this was a tearjerker. Tough to watch, especially when they sat down with the whole family and addressed their parents. I'm so glad the sisters have each other to learn on and to understand each other's hurt and anger. I pray they heal and get the continued support and love they so deserve and need. I am appalled that their abuser may potentially get off legally, but they definitely sent a strong message loud and clear that they are strong and stand for what's right, and they let everyone know how wrong he and his abuse was. Much love to these beautiful ladies❤️
Tearjerker alright...especially at the end. I was reaching for my whole box of tissues.
Oh , yes me too …. Lots of raw emotions. ❤❤❤❤❤
Thank-you for sharing this. I was sexually assaulted by my older brother (6 years older), for about 2 years. I am 69 and still have been blamed by my siblings for what happened. It is healing for me to hear your experience and journey to healing.
Thank you for sharing this. I am a Punjabi male born in the 80’s and was not sure what to expect from this incredibly well made documentary. Unfortunately I’m disappointed with the parent reaction and…that’s a common reaction from both parents when they have to deal with that sort of issue/confrontation.
VERY Well made! ❤
I was 14yrs old when I confessed to my school counsellor that my stepfather was behaving sexually inappropriately towards me.
It set of a reaction of hatred from my mother and stepdad.
However it gave my 2 older sisters who were 20 & 16 the courage to approach the police and confess the years of sexual abuse they had suffered by our stepfather..he was convicted and sentenced to jail.
My sisters and I now have 14 children and 11 grandchildren between us and have with the right tools openly educated awareness of sexual abuse and inappropriate behaviors that they may encounter at anytime by anyone and have encouraged them all male and female to seek a trusted person to confide these wrongdoings too until it is exposed,justice imposed and healing for the victim can begin.
Breaking the cycle of abuse is the most heroic life changing and courageous act one can do to save innocent souls from heartache,trauma and torment.
Thank you, you and your sister are heroes❤
Brought me to tears in a really good way , more people should be courageous like these women
Commenting a year later just to say, I am so so happy for you and your sisters. It took so much courage for a little girl to speak up, I know what it's like. You are a strong and amazing person. I hope your life continues to be blessed.
If you were my sisters I would have confronted him and might have done some severe damage to him. I had male cousin who tried to assault me one evening. I stopped it in time.I informed my parents they showed me no support. It Was swept it under the rug.I hold them to much anger to this day. Girls you are brave . Much LOVE and prayers for healing..
The jerk of a dad was sill blaming her. He told her she was responsible, but he NEVER acknowledged that HE was the one who should have been responsible. He NEVER acknowledged the fact that he completely failed to protect his daughters. How shameful that he was such a failure and such a coward.
These parents are simply cowards. Especially the father…just sitting there…blaming small children. Gross.
When dad said isn’t some of the responsibility on you I about fell off my chair 😭
The daughter was correct when she told him that his home wasn’t a safe space for them, and that his silence condoned the abusers actions.
It took so much courage for you women to stand up I did the same in 1983 at the age of 14. With thr help of the police charges were pressed and he my grandfather got a very small amount of jail time for 7 years of sa. I ultimately lost my entire family but the word of how unacceptable this is must come out. We need to support each other
When the daughter cried about her Mom not being the best Mom to her, it hit home. My Mom was a victim of SA at a very young age. It sent her on a path to a hard life of many situations that left her a broken person. Her Mother had also been a victim and both were unstable Mom's. They have both passed away and I realize their lives were so broken by the abuse they survived as children. I chose not to have children because I realized I am broken and I refuse to have children born to suffer.
That's me right now. The pressure is real.
I'm super proud that these women were able to come out and expose that monster.
Also, the fact that they were able to heal themselves because of that bond they have between them.
Lots of love 💕 and always keep your chin up.
When her father said that her 10 year old self was to blame, that damn conversation would have been OVER AND I would have had him charged as an accessory after the fact or sued him civilly. What a horrifying situation!
Unreal. These women did not get the justice they so clearly deserve. Ladies - I wish I could look each of you in the eye and give you a hug. You have tremendous strength and support in each other. Don’t lose sight of that and learn from your parents mistakes. Good for you for saying to your parents what you have held in for so many years. I will keep you in my thoughts and wish you nothing but health, happiness and strength. Be kind to yourselves and each other
WOW! I cried through this whole video. Even though I am not South Asian my story seems to parallel. These three sisters are the most beautiful and brave women!.... my story was me being sexually abused at 5 years old by a 16 year old male cousin. I did not tell my mother until I was 32 years old and the first thing she said to me was " Don't tell your dad"..... this crushed me. She valued his feelings over mine because it was her side of the family and she knew my father would blame her. Needless to say I can relate to the survivor pain in not having supportive family. My children grew up with a very hypersensitive mother and knew that their private parts were only theirs to be touched. I forgive my mother for her ignorance but it is hard. Thank you so much for this documentary.....sexual abuse knows no culture, religion or social status. People that are brave enough to challenge these crimes are the only way to protect our future children. Thank you again and I hope you have found healing.
no one deserves to go through this... i wish you sm peace and happiness
The sisters said their Dad would tell them not to sit next to this cousin. This was before he knew about the abuse. The dad could tell something was going on. Instead of investigating further, he puts the responsibility on his daughters. He was telling them before he was told about the abuse.
I agree with you. But he will use the fact that he told them prior as a warning and view the outcome as disobedience. It's so sad- the ignorance. Someone has to break the cycle- in this case, it's the sisters. They are the true heroes and ultimately they saved future generations, what her father and mother are INCAPABLE of doing so.
Or maybe he already had history of abuse and the dad knew it therefore tried to “warn” them. I find that most men can spot a pervert or bad man fairly easily and will warn others to stay away from them so its pretty shocking to me that the dad basically turned against his daughters smh. Most men are very protective of their daughters. But at the same time misogyny runs really deep in this world. Nothing surprises me that much anymore sadly.
Born and brought up in Punjab, a sikh girl , I am very grateful to my parents especially my father who raised me like his elder son ! Not only he gave me best education , best upbringing and taught me on how to live a dignified independent life ! “You cannot do this because you are a girl” I never heard this in my life , as I heard from my friends this is what their parents told them. I hope i have a daughter too, so I raise her the same way as I was raised.
Such incredibly strong courageous women. Thank you for sharing this with the world that needs it so much. You’re incredible!
Those three women are incredibly strong and brave. Fighting for what is right, for justice and first and foremost for such a horrible crime to not happen to other girls. They not only fight against their abuser, but against people looking away, a culture looking away, their own parents looking away. I wish them all the best, I wish them to heal and recover. To me, by starting to fight, they stopped being victims and turned in to survivers and heroines.
"Only 1% of these cases make it this far the lawyer said." That is sobering.
That's not what she said. She said "only 1% of women make it to where we've made it". Verdict. Please tell me what the difference is between what she said and what you typed.
@@blakejameson1114 it’s not because there’s a lack of sexual abuse. It’s because the vast majority of sexual assault goes unreported because most women fear not being believed and/or retribution (nearly 90% of all incidents in the US as an example). Then of that already small amount, a fraction are actually charged, and even less are brought to trial. I guess what I’m trying to say is… why are you arguing semantics on the societal degradation of women? Is it because you’re a misogynist?
@@bethany2820 well words matter don't they? Can you tell me what the difference is in the OP and what the woman actually said?
@@blakejameson1114 sorry, I already graduated law school and don’t need to be quizzed by some random man on the internet who wants to play word games and downplay the adversities faced by women of color. And honestly there is no substantive difference, only 1% of cases do make it that far, largely because of the societal and institutional hurdles women face (not because Canada is notorious for back room plea deals).
@@bethany2820 what society is degrading women and what are the primary factors that increase the rates of the abuse of children (not just girls)?
My 50 years of carrying my secret ended with this amazing story of survival, thank you and may God bless you forward, please forgive your parents and accept Mom apology, sister’s emotions was so well captured, God bless you all!
"We are daughters, we are not wanted anyway" - unfortunately so many women in the South Asian community can relate to this comment. Brilliant documentary. The women should be extremely proud of themselves ❤️
thank-you for being so bold and standing your ground in speaking truth to your family.
i love these women with my entire heart. i'm so glad this docu was made.
How can 9-12 year old be responsible for this criminal act ??
This is one of the reasons why I am my children best friend and I will always be their numbers one supporter.
Yesss..please be..my parents arent
this is so emotional. the sisters are so brave for confronting their parents about the incident. you can wonder how many girls were sexually harassed by the people in their own home and can't help but choose to remain silent. imagine they were just children when it happened. i can feel the fear and the pain and how it continues to be there even when u grow up.
I'm caucasian American and have VERY SIMILAR life experiences. I tried to talk to my mom with my aunt's help and mom wouldn't listen
The confrontation with the parents was so much more respectful than I could have ever been. I , too, was raised in a home where my opinions didn't matter, where I wasn't protected, and big feelings (or speaking out) were considered unacceptable for the children. Problems and conflicts were swept under the rug. The trauma still haunts me. Blessings and respect to all of the sisters 💗 Y'all have not only helped yourselves, but you set a great example and make the world a better place.
Initially I cried buckets full but as i watched on in horror heartbroken. My tears turned to anger & than finally i felt some relief towards the end. So proud of you all for showing the world what REAL STRONG WOMEN are capable of. I am sure you've helped so many young girls/women across the globe that abuse in any form be it mental, physical or sexual will NOT be tolerated ever.!
God bless you all. 🙏🏼
If only the parents could see what we see?
3 beautiful, brave, strong outstanding women. I’m truly in awe of them. Where they have found the strength to fight back against everything, I’ll never know. I’m so proud of them. Justice will happen for them ❤
Why his name is not published for community to be aware?? He’s still living his best among other children and young women.. if court did nothing at least we can do is make sure we stay far away and keep other away from him…
His name is Manjit Virk
I cannot believe it wasn’t said in the documentary. He just gets to walk away.
@@shabnamrussell513 shocked to know 😢
@@shabnamrussell513Thank you. How do you know?
Right I agree
I was brought up in western culture but had similar experiences. Told that I was the one that was wrong as I liked him… I was 5 yrs old and he was a friend of the family, at least 25ish. I liked alot of my parents friends but didnt mean they could do those things to me. Although this has brought back many unwanted memories , I applaud you all for being so brave. ❤️
I'm so sorry for your experience....
@@tab5470 Thank you 🙏
Im sorry that happened to you
Very similar story of mine but it was my own mother blaming me for her family being torn apart because the man who did it and went to jail was also one of her children.
💔💔💔
OMG🥺💔I am so very Sorry this happened to you ladies. Know that you have the support of others like me and we thank you for having the strength to tell your story, it gives other women strength to also share their story💖
Some people don’t deserve to have children. And the brother who was raised in the western culture didn’t have the balls to stand up for his sister either, he has no excuses, he just enjoys being the favorite just because he’s a guy.
Ironically enough, it's the females that have the courage and strength that is lacking from the male counterparts
You see that in “so called” black cultures around the world. Black women are praised for being strong, but that trope isn’t a compliment. It’s justifying the neglect, abuse and mistreatment of black women.
Many black women are strong, because we have no choice. We don’t have a collective group of men who provide for us and protect us and our children.
@@claudiaargueta3767it is through all cultures that women are emotionally stronger, honest and courageous. So many men lack a backbone and move from woman to woman for fear of being alone with a vessel to empty into in all ways!!
Both parents were so wrong, they should have put there own daughters 1st and protected them, instead they were treated in ridiculous outdated male dominated cruel way. The father is spineless weak man, my dad would have chased the preditor and dealt with him. All the females treated like slaves, no eye contact how appalling. My heart goes out to the brave women, how can men blame their own innocent little vulnerable girls, its so sickening, the mother didnt protect them, saying dont tell anyone.... shameful.
cnt believe a spinless father blaming 10 year old daughter and asking them to stay away, and tht person who did wrong to his daughter never even confronted one time let alone being lawfully punished.If a child is not safe with her parents then what is the safe place for them?
Heartbreaking! I'd like to know why women are so looked down upon. Who do the men think will have their children if no woman is involved? To blame an innocent child in any way is just down right evil. I applaud these lovely, beautiful women. Sisters staying strong together. It hurts so much to not have the support of family. My prayers go out to all the women going through such horror. My heart is with you.
Lost for words that the father told his 3 daughters that they are also responsible for the abuse that was taking place in their home. My heart breaks that people still think this way.
So glad the sisters have each other
Heartbreaking. My late father always said he's so blessed to have three girls we are three sisters and my father was an amazing dad
It appears the girls were not suported by the parents which is more hurtful, the parents were more worried about what society will thimk - a big fail from both mum and dad
Happy the sister's set the new example and did it together! Pray they heal and now others won't suffer!
53:51 I can honestly understand her here. I am literally in the same space. I'm in my 30s, never dated or had a bf. The feeling of anyone getting physically close to me is crippling. I may like a guy but will never say anything. The moment any guy comes at me with any emotion, it's like an automatic switch and I immediately cannot stand them. I mentally cannot get out of this no matter how hard I try. It's debilitating and depressing.
I'm going to pray for your recovery. I'm so sorry this happened to you. Much love ❤
I'm from Philippines and we used to live in a house with extended family staying with us ,my mom said that they can discipline me and my sister. She gave them right to hit us if they have to. My sister is naughtier than me so she gets hit most of the time. It's sad I thought it was ok then bcuz they are family also. But I'm a mom now and I always always say Nobody can hit my kids, please!.
Unfortunately, breaking away from abusers is the hardest choice a person can make but the most powerful self choice one can make.
You could easily turn around and mistreat your kids. Good thing you broke the cycle and your kids don't have to grow up with abuse being the norm.
You could easily turn around and mistreat your kids. Good thing you broke the cycle and your kids don't have to grow up with abuse being the norm. ❤
So much gaslighting happening here it’s truly frightening.
I'm glad people are waking up to the signs of gaslighting. It can be very subtle at times.
Sending much love to the sisters, I’m just sorry you did not receive the help and support you so deserved as a child, from your parents, and now I feel a huge let down by the legal system. What a strong bond you girls have ❤
I admire you, girls, so much. Your story has touched me a lot and it also has been really triggering. I hope you guys can heal slowly, but steadily. It’s definitely not easy, but that’s the goal. I am giving advice I don’t follow, but, please, keep being this vocal and protect your own ALWAYS. I love you. From the bottom of my heart. I hate using this word with victims of sexual abuse (any word depicted strength), but you guys are literally warriors. Confronting your parents this way knowing it can also be triggering is… I fully support you, appreciate you and love you ❤️. I am proud of you 🤍. Sending each one of you a BIG virtual hug 🫂❤️.
All 3 lady are absolutely beautiful and I understand completely what they went thru! Happened when I was 5,6,7. Cps took me away....happened again in fostercare...3 different foster homes..then got adopted! But I live with what happened to me every single day of my life. The ones who were suppose to protect me didnt....I can't explain how that feels! Like no one in the world loves me or could love me...I understand ladys. I pray God shines his love in yall and that one day we all will be healed!
Thanks so much for sharing your stories. I cried. I hope your parents are more supportive now. You're such strong women.
How could her husband think she wasn’t pretty?? He must’ve been lying to mentally oppress her - to keep her from realizing her worth. Otherwise, why say such a thing even if you believed that? Even if you were marrying for a passport, and dumb with bad eyesight and crap opinions and no taste. What a complete waste he was.
She is beautiful and when she was young she was stunning. That’s so sad. Regardless, even if she had not been: She deserved a marriage of love. ❤
That man was truly disgusting to say that to her. I suspect his motive was to destroy all her self confidence.
I simply couldn’t fathom being with a man who didn’t consider me to be beautiful. What she point in a relationship like that.
This documentary needs to reach more people.
How sad. The fact that even now, after all these years, their dad can't accept responsibility for bringing a sexual predator into their home. And the mom is even more responsible. The brother is a joke. Its very telling that he says one thing, but his eyes speak another. These woman were wronged, by their parents, their family, their traditions, and thier govt.
Parents forget that children will be adults one day and that they remember EVERYTHING
Asian mentality ( we are taught that extended family is just like close family) is to make their family and their culture closer to their children in foreign countries so their children don't miss real , clean , religious and values of their cultures. 😢
... that their mum principally speaks Punjabi, after spending the lion's share of her adult life in Canada, pretty well says it all .. as for inviting her family to join them? She did what was expected of her; nothing more, nothing less ...basically, she brought India to Canada, so why come to Canada?
Just watched this can understand what these sisters went through as it was same situation we had. Big hugs to the sisters .
So many emotions here. 😪 The sisters are incredible, I could not be more proud of them. The rest? I will let silence speak for me. The absolute most crushing aspect of this? The last couple of paragraphs. I am unable to accept a rule of law that lets a rapist go free BECAUSE HE WAS NOT TRIED SOON ENOUGH. I feel sick. To the sisters, the husband, her daughters.....my utmost love and respect.
Anyone who put kids in danger should get same treatment. I don't care if its mother Father,brother, uncle or stranger.
I cried when she sat on that couch pouring her heart out her parents and her dad just sat there and didn't even get up to hug them . what the he'll is wrong with him. I
The parents are to blame. They should be taking care of their daughters. So sad, my heart is aching for these girls. Bless them
Oh God bless all of you. I hear you, I too was abused but by my uncle’s friend. They stayed in our home for a weekend and his friend abused me. I didn’t tell my Mummy for years. I’m married now, I told my husband of the abuse, we have a daughter, she’s 21 this year and we’re so protective over her. Our daughter is our life, we’d die for her. You ladies are amazing and so strong. 💪🏻🥰❤️❤️❤️❤️
I salute these brave woman who stood up for themselves against everyone who did them wrong. I can say by experience that this still goes on in year 2024 and I am not sure if it will ever end. But what we can do is stand up for yourself and protect all the Innocent boys and girls around us by speaking up. Again, thank you for sharing this and I wish you all the peace, love and rest you need to continue your life.
I hope these brave, beautiful women have been able to finally find some peace.
These girls are brave to speak up, this kind of abuse needs to stop, we do not have to punish our daughters just because what people will say. I wish these sisters well.
Beautiful brave women. Thank god they have each other. The parents are like stones sitting there with no compasión or remorse. So arrogant is the father he has to blame his own daughters. No wonder women don’t want to go to court. I can’t believe he got off with his vile crimes. How could he get off when three girls were victims. Shocking
I give these sisters all the credit in the world for speaking out against these kind of odds. I can't understand the fixation on boys. In order for your family to grow there must be daughters. In this culture they do everything for these men and they still don't want women. I hope their view of women changes.
wow at the end: hard talk between the generations ! very good. very needed.
You are all so brave for sharing your stories especially reminding us how Punjabi women are strong. Experiencing abuse does not make the abused any less strong and you women choose strength over and over again. You should be proud for how you parent and live your all your girls. so much unlearning has to take place so we can enjoy the beautiful parts of being Punjabi. Thank you for helping a Punjabi sister see and learn from you,
My life isn’t much different to what these beautiful strong went through. I faced, physical, emotional and financial abuse from my family. The abuse I’ve suppressed that. Some days I surprise myself that I’m strong enough to be still alive.
To anyone facing this abuse, you owe your family nothing. The biggest regret I will ever have is never making those who abused me accountable. I mean my own family told me that if I told anyone, no one will believe you.
I'm glad you exist. Try to make some changes to hold them accountable. Thank you for your courage to speak up.
I applaud the strength and courage these ladies have shown . It's sad when technical loopholes in laws let such monsters slip away but I pray for their triumph and for their healing from this trauma. Only they know how they have suffered. Much love to all three of them❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
I balled my eyes out . The dad didn’t want to bring shame on the family. Shame on him nothing has changed culturally..
Sorry but the brother should know better rather than sticking up for the parents. They are in the wrong. Your daughter's just needed a hug and a shoulder to cry on and be listened to.
You definitely saved other girls lives. Your r Heroes ❤
i live in this small town. its not safe for women that way. time doesnt progress this place at all.
The dad and brother still dont get it..
My dad and brother don't understand either.
Honestly this was my understanding too. Like the mom is just numb to the fact that such a horrendous thing happened.
These 3 beautiful women made through a trauma and keep together. God will always be with them.
Brave women ❤️
As a survivor also within an Asian family, I understand how difficult it may be for the parents to know how to respond.
I feel like there needs to be some sort of mediation from a third party in such instances to help bridge the gap.
Sometimes mothers act like fathers. Prayers to future survivors.
Even the son does not want to give support to his sisters so warped
He’s been raised with the same toxic mindset. He’s a beneficiary of toxic masculinity, and probably believes that he’s superior to his sisters.
Common culture
Heart breaking xx cause they will never get that childhood back.They were robbed of their childhood and teenage years xx xx So brave to challenge this person after all these years.Hopefully will inspire others to come forward and stop the abuse in any family setting xx xx my heart aches for you xx xx xx
Your love for each other, the close bond and holding each other is inspiring and awesome ❤
Does this mean that they can never leave their children with the grandparents?
I wouldn’t leave my children with them. They’ve proven that they’re not a protective factor for precious children.
The fact there is no word for ‘emotional support’ in their language speaks volumes.
A lot of things about the dynamics in the family seem strange. Things like the mother bringing her whole family over, the girls being the lowest in the hierarchy despite it being theirs father's house, them not looking their dad in the eye etc. All this is the norm in South Asian culture. Girls are just a burden who will be married off at some point from 14 to their 20s.
A boy is like a king compared to the girls. It is common to live in what are called joint families. Living with cousins, aunts, uncles, nieces and nephews. The children then have to give huge amounts of "respect" to these relatives. It was these sisters own father's household yet they were the lowest on the hierarchy
All this makes it easy for a predator to abuse children
I think with all sexual abuse the abusers prey on young females or males but they forget these victims grow up and tell their stories and it’s devastating how broken and they are and how it affects their whole lives 😢😢
A definite must watch … lots of raw emotions along with transparency ❤❤❤❤❤❤ love these courageous ladies !!!
You all are so brave! Thank God you had each other. For sure, out there, you helped other children in the same situation, unfortunately. Thank you for sharing this painful experience if us all. God bless you, sister
Gosh, I commend these women for sharing their story. And their strength to fight back. Not only against their predator, but also their family, mainly their father. What happened was incredibly wrong, and no victim should have to “take responsibility for their part.” Especially children! I hope with all my being those charges stood, and that man is held accountable for his heinous behavior.
Here 3 women turned in to STRONG amazing people and the very best of mothers but that does not excuse or condone the abuse they suffered for them to become that! But their daughters are so amazingly blessed to have Women this strong in morals and abilities to protect them and teach them right. This is what strong women look like. But they should NEVER have to endure abuse of any sort to become the beautiful blossoms they are.