Sir, we would like to declare wa- THE WIZARD, FETCH HIS DAMN TABLET FIRST B-But sir we want to attack this entire cit- GO FETCH HIS DAMN TABLET BEFORE I PISS MESELF
12:20 You’ll hear the draugr laughing at you because you’re about to run into that trap. They’ve been waiting hundreds of years to prank someone with that spiky wall and just couldn’t hold it in any longer.
The jarl of whiterun literally forces a stormcloak messenger to deal with his problems and then acts like he's betrayed when the *stormcloak messenger* is allied with the stormckoaks
To be fair, you don´t actually specify that you´re a stormcloak (Unless you were wearing the outfit in that case it's obvious, but ive done naked runs before) so he just assumed you were delivering a message just like any other regular delivery quest adventurers do. Then again he could just be pissed you weren't with him and instead against him... you were his thane after all.
@@utopiaplace8074 It's no longer about nations, ideologies, or ethnicity. It's an endless series of proxy battles, fought by mercenaries and machines. War, and its consumption of life, has become a well oiled machine. War has changed. ID tagged soldiers carry ID tagged weapons, us ID tagged gear. Nano-machines inside their bodies enhance and regulate their abilites. Genetic control, information control, emotion control, battlefield control. Everything is monitored, and kept under control. War has changed. The age of deterrence, has become the age of control. All in the name of averting catastrophe from weapons of mass destruction. And he who controls the battlefield, controls history. War has changed. When the battlefield is under total control, war becomes routine.
More accurately war crime trials require you to sign a treaty. The USA, China, And Russia are not signatories so they cannot be persecuted for war crimes cause they do not consent. There’s nothing stopping a winner from being prosecuted if their country signed a relevant treaty. This is why the warrant for Putin’s warcrimes is irrelevant and unenforceable.
Gotta love how Miraak puts the book that is the secret to his power behind a temple's worth of security, including numerous hidden passages and layers far more complex than any other dragon cult temple, yet the other side is just a fake rock leading right to the Skaal Village.
@Sorley Walker Secret exits, yes. Secret exits that lead directly to the treasure room in the secret castle-beneath-the-castle, not so much. The Temple of Miraak is like having the secret alien ward beneath the already secret military base at Area 51 having a secret exit that leads to a bathroom stall in the Luxor casino.
Well former-Archmage Savos Aren did seal away the dangerous dragon priest Morokei wielding the mighty Staff of Magnus by placing a plank of wood on a double door from the inside, so this is a fairly standard security model in Tamriel apparently
You see, ymfah uses a magic companion as a marriage option. this means when it comes to the marriage. Hermaeus Mora feels the disterbance within the magic and knowledge planes. This means that for Miraak having gained power from Mora is ultimately weakened and unable to overthrow Mora. He is recorded in lore to say "Damn you the false Dragonborn the power of the boner was not strong enough to defeat you as Mara predicted" But due to it's graphic implictions was not put in the final cut.
14:25 Every kneeling enemy in Skyrim gets up after a time and resumes fighting , thus they are feigning surrendering. According to the 1977 Protocol I Additional to the Geneva Conventions of 12 August 1949, article 37, 1 a, this type of perfidy is prohibited. So in this case the enemies are the ones committing the war crimes.
@@jackfrost9512 The article bans the use of animals or theirs carcasses as bombs, or more specifically, booby-traps, check it out: hrlibrary.umn.edu/instree/1980d.htm so it probably includes dolphins. I could find some things about military trained dolphins, just like dogs, but the only thing about exploding ones is some allegation that Iran was trying it or something. Also Wikipedia said that the USA tried using bats and pigeons, while the bomb dogs were an soviet idea.
@@deadmeme897 yep, USSR used explosive dogs during WWII to blow up Nazi tanks. They specifically trained dogs to leap beneath the tanks because the bottom is the weakest part of any tank. While this sounds horrible and wondrous at the same time, this tactic wasn't really effective. Most of the time bombs blew up on the open field, and sometimes even beneath the friendly Soviet tanks, as dogs doesn't have any distinction between Nazi and Soviet vehicles
@@loganreed23 soviet tanks ran on diesel, nazi tanks ran on petrol, so the dogs did have a way to distinct them(the smell of the burnt fuel), but the soviets trained them on their own tanks, so that's why they blew soviet tanks up, they only recognised them as targets
Like the tf2 medics background. "Born in Stuttgart, Germany, during an era where the hippocratic oath had been downgraded to an optional hippocratic suggestion"
I like how the Imperial starting quest is “there’s this fort we really want to garrison, it would be important for the civil war” and the stormcloak quest is “uhhh go kill an ice snake”
there's a theory that they only want true nords in the army (as well as Skyrim in general) so they rigged the entry exam in their favor due to their natural frost resistance
@@wadespencer3623 If you're not a Nord, Galmar gives you frost resist potions. The trial is surprisingly fair for all races, and also really easy because he also gives you 3 really strong poisons specifically meant to cheese the Frost Wraith.
Reminds me of that Rick and Morty episode where Morty wanted to save the fart cloud from being assassinated, and ended up causing the deaths of thousands of people in the process.
Great video, but i think there was easier option 1. Imperials have "voice of emperor' which stops targets from fighting 2. You can dismiss companions So 1.Go to the fort 2. VOE 3. Dismiss companion 4. Apply " fury " spell on your former companion
How to pacifist run a civil war Step 1, steal from prisoners Step 2, steal from eldritch wizards Step 3, preform technical gymnastics around the term 'Pacifist' Step 4, be in the general vicinity during the commitment of war crimes Step 5, break the laws of physics with a sickening *crack*
although the one war crime with killing surrendering enemies is kinda negated as in skyrim if you don't kill them while surrendering they attack again (faking surrender is also a war crime) :D
@@Damini368 i guess that would have to depend on what they did during the war. Like if they just managed the planes on a carrier ship, and never got into an actual fire fight then that wouldnt be wierd, but if they where an actual soldier and got into fire fights, then yeah that would be wierd
Let me tell ya, this boy makes videos like nobody else, I already rewatched his channel like 3 times? Every time he releases new video about skyrim its just like a small burst of joy for me. Thank you ymfah.
@@XeroXid1337 there are many amazing channels, but for one to make people rewatch the entire channel (I've done it once or twice with ymfah already) is truly something special. This guys content is just so perfect
16:40 Dragonborn: "I'm back!" *Holds up bloody axe Ulfric: "So what did the Jarl have to- why is it coated in blood?" Dragonborn: "I 'delivered' the axe. You know wink wink." Ulfric: "You- did you KILL HIM!?" Dragonborn: "Well yeah, isn't that what you meant?" Ulfric: "NO! It's a Nord tradition! It's a challenge!" Dragonborn: "Oh..." Galmar: "Gods is that his EYEBALL on it!?"
"You stand accused of murder-by-exploding-dog." "Hey man I just summon the dogs don't blame me if when they explode sometimes people die." Skyrim: "seems legit."
@@TaikaJamppa You do realize the Stormcloaks have literally the worst equipment in the game right? Like, statistically, their curiass gives 21 points compared to the 23 of an imperial armor, their cuffs and boots are 5 points Vs the 7 of an Imperial, and their helmet is 1 point weaker too. They also lack Heavy Armour and to add insult to injury you cannot even get a Stormcloak helmet at helgen. Literally the only reason why you would want to join them in the first place is so you can loot the Imperial statistically superior armoury AND weaponry given the Imperial Grade. And this isn't even taking into account the lore related, in universe political implications of joining the Stormcloaks unironically given their Status as "More Subtly Fascist Fallout New Vegas Legion," this is just mechanics really.
@@LeTtRrZ so as long as you’re a hot girl with million simping for you, you can break any and all guidelines without having any consequences? Huh, neat
I love how much effort goes into these challenge runs. They're like the antithesis of all those "CaN u BeAt FalLoUt wItH tWo LiTeRs OfF pIsS??" videos that clog up and ruin the integrity of somebody pushing an engine beyond its limits just to see if you could. Not to mention the editing, oh my god, not only are all the videos fully edited with memes and references, theyre set up to actually tell a narrative! Ymfah is a top tier content creator.
"pushing an engine beyond it's limits" yeah many parts of this video and some of the other ones he made go beyond pushing the limits and simply shatter the game. this video has the most examples of this and the most agrigious ones but all of them have some examples. what i mean is that the entire video is filled with glitches that make no sense that someone will figure them out edit: tell me for what reason and under what circumctanses would someone find out most of these. i know that glitch hunters exist but in the cases of the claw doors while the glitch is possible it's unbelivably hard to make and so: how do people figure it out?
@@goatass3402 I mean, the bucket and cauldron is just basic troll physics, everyone obviously did it on their first play-through. Wait, what do you mean you didn't? Aww man, I didn't wanna be the bearer of bad news...
The US isnt actually bound by the Geneva Convention, they didn’t sign it, but everyone else was too afraid to make them at the time.... thought that was mentionable
I love how they include all the mistakes and dead-ends, it really brings you along for the ride. Amazing voice edits too. All-round incredible editing, I instantly fell in love with this channel.
I like how this takes all of what ymfah's learned from all of their other challenges and applies it together, like this is a culmination of all their efforts.
The leaders of the storm cloak rebellion losing to a naked women with her bare hands is a very accurate representation of what it feels like siding with the storm cloaks sometimes
"Naked man runs into battle, casts spell to calm everyone down, steals the weapons and clothes off his enemies' bodies, then casts another spell to resume the fight" is genuine roleplay material though
I love how the different clutter items are special-purpose tools for flying with different properties. Skyrim's developers are truly geniuses for including such hidden features.
I've played this game for almost a decade now, and I just NOW realized Galmar sends you to fight an ice wraith in the middle of an iceberg knowing Nords will have a far easier time at it for their natural resistance to the cold He does it in the hopes any non Nord dies of hypothermia trying
I was always under the assumption that it was a nord tradition, and he is just applying it as a recruitment test. Also, while he doesn't skirt around the oddity of a non-Nord fighting for Skyrim, he doesn't hate the idea. The gist of the conversation is "Why would a (non-Nord) fight for the stormcloaks?" Your character replys "Skyrim is my home, and I will die protecting it" to which he replies "Aye, that's as good of a reason as any." And the entire thing is dropped.
@@haroldbalzac6336 he also says "usually we send new recruits to train before accepting them but for you let's do something a little different" or something like that Granted he also sends Nord Dragonborns to do it but like I said a Nord has a far easier time completing it than an Argonian or Elf
Galmar actually explains why the test is how it is if you ask about it after completion. The ice wraith killing is meant to be breezed through effortlessly with the poisons he provides, with the real test being the act of reaching the Serpent Stone through the tundra, to test one's resolve for the cause. The test is essentially meant to be as harmless as physically possible if you're serious about the cause and/or have a warm coat. It literally is about annoying the test takers with a long, cold hike and seeing if they have the nerve to put up with that annoyance. In contrast, Rikke sending out one person to clear out an entire fort is pretty messed up to the point of being a suicide mission for anyone whose not a plot armored player character (because like hell any normal recruit can do that). What's also hilarious is that without any survival mods with freezing mechanics, Galmar's test is completely effortless since the whole point of it isn't a non-modded game mechanic.
Soldier: "You are a war hero!" Ymfah: "Thank you." Soldier: "man... I can still see the faces of all the people I killed it is horrible! Do you?" Ymfah: "I didn't ki- yeah..." Soldier: "It sucks... but at least we were honorable and gave them a good death. War crimes are unacceptable." Ymfah: "Uh..." Soldier: "what?" Ymfah: "...Nothing."
I both find it incredibly irritating yet completely on-brand for ymfah to go through the Dragonborn DLC to fail at getting Miraak's robes instead of just grabing Targe of the Blooded to clear out the fort for the Imperials
I think the best thing about your videos is that you also show the methods that don't work. it really adds to how dedicated you are to making sure you achieve the challenge
Either Sheogorath or Clavicus Vile. Sheo because of the sheer absurdity and, well, madness of it all. Clavicus Vile because Ymfah did exactly what he set out to do in the most indirect manner possible, bringing an end to the civil war without bringing any _direct_ harm to his opponents, besides maybe psychological. Clavicus Vile has a very indirect method of granting his followers' wishes, ranging from giving one of them an axe to cure his daughter's lycanthropy, and curing vampirism by having his followers annihilated by an unknowing dragonborn, answering their prayers in perhaps the most indirect way possible. Fun fact for those who have read this far down; the Voice Actor for Clavicus Vile is the same person who voices the Mister Handies from Fallout. _let that sink in for a moment._
Another pacifist tip: when taking over forts, after you meet up with your fellow soldiers, you can just stand back and watch them storm the fort. Don't worry if they die; more of them will appear out of thin air until the fort is taken.
I don't see enough mentions of how much of a genius you are. Your music choices, efforts, voice editing (stonecock), and your comedic timing are simply amazing
Can I just say how much I appreciate the way you use music? Whenever I recognise where something is from I get this little spark of joy, plus it always makes it super entertaining to watch every video again!
I love how he finds new ways to complete his challenges I mean, he could just use the spiders which kill without leaving a stat (see The Dark Brotherhood without killing), but he spent a bunch of time trying to get Mirak's Robes via a combination of glitches, which in the end, didn't even work.
I like that he shows failed ideas to show that it wasn't just a one and done, he went through multiple concepts to get the end result. Also that he uses different "features" for every video so it isn't all more of the same
Sibbi Black Briar: "I caught a man trying to pickpocket me while I was in prison and then he phased through his cell with a bucket." "I've seen some shit."
*How to Pacifist the Civil War using War Crimes*
Discussion thread for QnA cuz YT comment suck : redd.it/jjonqj
nice
Nice
Nice
nice
Nice
"You're a war hero from the Civil War, how many did you kill?"
"Kill?"
yes, he and Galmar StoneCokc have peacefully resolved the civil war with only nuke dogs and tentacles.
"I was just committing war crimes"
“Lots, but no one seems to think so...”
RAIN DOWN THAT COLLATERAL PACIFISM BOYS
who are you quoting?
Batman: "I don't kill people."
Also Batman:
This is literally the Batman problem in two sentences and one UA-cam video
Bookmarking so I can use this for an academic essay
420th like bro
Galmar: "Your task is to rescue the prisoners."
Ralof: "Shame none of the prisoners made it. Go report our success."
That made me laugh 😂
To be fair, they still got the fort itself.
*Mission Faild Successfully*
Alternative title: "Naked man commits war crimes for 38 minutes and 30 seconds while other naked people tell him to get dressed"
Lmao 😂
Did you not watch the video ?! It’s not a war crime if you win !
Naked girl fist two burly guys to near death.
News: Crazy man running around in streets naked, committing war crimes.
Naked man commits crimes against physics while making other people naked as well
I love it how Balgruuf doesn't let you declare war on him until you've done an errand for his court wizard.
It’s Nordic tradition to have someone else do your busy work
Sir, we would like to declare wa-
THE WIZARD, FETCH HIS DAMN TABLET FIRST
B-But sir we want to attack this entire cit-
GO FETCH HIS DAMN TABLET BEFORE I PISS MESELF
Balgruuf just achieved world peace, simply do not allow war to take place for as long as you have personal problems
I’m offended by this comment. Please delete
Because he's Jarl Balgruuf and he be ballin' swag
12:20 You’ll hear the draugr laughing at you because you’re about to run into that trap. They’ve been waiting hundreds of years to prank someone with that spiky wall and just couldn’t hold it in any longer.
I love the idea of this thank you😂😂
This is canon now
Bro u got me crying LMAO!!!
Thank you so much I need that.
The jarl of whiterun literally forces a stormcloak messenger to deal with his problems and then acts like he's betrayed when the *stormcloak messenger* is allied with the stormckoaks
To be fair, you don´t actually specify that you´re a stormcloak (Unless you were wearing the outfit in that case it's obvious, but ive done naked runs before) so he just assumed you were delivering a message just like any other regular delivery quest adventurers do. Then again he could just be pissed you weren't with him and instead against him... you were his thane after all.
That jarl is an idiot anyway
@@ChonkedCat i mean he is one of the few jarls that seems to care about the whole dragons killing my people situation so he has my respect
What else would you expect from a whiny Imperial sympathiser... Support Ulfric, or die trying. There's no in between.
Dunno, seems kinda gay to me.
*use bucket to practically fly
“War, war never changes”
War has changed)
@@utopiaplace8074 It's no longer about nations, ideologies, or ethnicity. It's an endless series of proxy battles, fought by mercenaries and machines. War, and its consumption of life, has become a well oiled machine. War has changed. ID tagged soldiers carry ID tagged weapons, us ID tagged gear. Nano-machines inside their bodies enhance and regulate their abilites. Genetic control, information control, emotion control, battlefield control. Everything is monitored, and kept under control. War has changed. The age of deterrence, has become the age of control. All in the name of averting catastrophe from weapons of mass destruction. And he who controls the battlefield, controls history. War has changed. When the battlefield is under total control, war becomes routine.
@@trackernivrig no u
ITS TIME FOR SOME COLLATERAL PACIFISM BOYS
The true invention of the first plane
"War Crimes are OK as long as you win." Actually correct. 10/10 very informative
exactly, not gonna prosecute yourself
More accurately war crime trials require you to sign a treaty. The USA, China, And Russia are not signatories so they cannot be persecuted for war crimes cause they do not consent. There’s nothing stopping a winner from being prosecuted if their country signed a relevant treaty. This is why the warrant for Putin’s warcrimes is irrelevant and unenforceable.
If you win, there will be none to judge you lol
this is a canada% run of the civil war
Gotta love how Miraak puts the book that is the secret to his power behind a temple's worth of security, including numerous hidden passages and layers far more complex than any other dragon cult temple, yet the other side is just a fake rock leading right to the Skaal Village.
@Sorley Walker Secret exits, yes. Secret exits that lead directly to the treasure room in the secret castle-beneath-the-castle, not so much. The Temple of Miraak is like having the secret alien ward beneath the already secret military base at Area 51 having a secret exit that leads to a bathroom stall in the Luxor casino.
@@xiiiultima To be fair, a casino would be the last place you'd think to look for a secret door to Area 51.
Hermaeus Mora rigged the game from the start.
They weren't expecting the bucket
Well former-Archmage Savos Aren did seal away the dangerous dragon priest Morokei wielding the mighty Staff of Magnus by placing a plank of wood on a double door from the inside, so this is a fairly standard security model in Tamriel apparently
The Bleak Falls Barrow 'speedrunning' was so unnecessary that I'm almost certain it took longer than if you just did it the normal way.
I love it.
He really wants to use that Science Defying Vehicle (bucket) to a good use
But could he have passed our boi in the net as a pacifist?
@@kingKapuzina could've just pickpocketed the claw
@@kingKapuzina You mean Arvel? That dude gets decked by the first draugr that sees him if you don't get to him first.
Truthfully i do the same but i just tcl through the door. Sure its cheating but fuck that dungeon
I just imagine Miraak the entire time after you stole his clothes standing alone for ages until finally hes like: ".....did it get colder in here?"
-Miss your wedding
-That breaks the Miraak cutscene
I need a lore friendly explanation.
Miraak just wants to give you some space
Miraak realizes you are single and can't help himself
It breaks both the questline and poor Marcurio's heart
In reality you were marrying Miraak in disguise and he is heartbroken
You see, ymfah uses a magic companion as a marriage option. this means when it comes to the marriage. Hermaeus Mora feels the disterbance within the magic and knowledge planes. This means that for Miraak having gained power from Mora is ultimately weakened and unable to overthrow Mora. He is recorded in lore to say "Damn you the false Dragonborn the power of the boner was not strong enough to defeat you as Mara predicted" But due to it's graphic implictions was not put in the final cut.
"Let the Dragonborn kill me."
"KILL???? what kind of monster do you think I am??"
but I did kidnaped his wife
@@redeyeczletsplay3235 GTA V reference, nice.
"I hate the enemy, but do not kill them."
~ Master Chief, 1492
@@redeyeczletsplay3235
Dammit you beat me
22:43 - put the fear of the nine into those motherf*ckers
best line in skyrim
Didn’t even realize it was edited at first
14:25 Every kneeling enemy in Skyrim gets up after a time and resumes fighting , thus they are feigning surrendering. According to the 1977 Protocol I Additional to the Geneva Conventions of 12 August 1949, article 37, 1 a, this type of perfidy is prohibited. So in this case the enemies are the ones committing the war crimes.
lol, i didn't expect to learn so much about war crimes today. This is better than online class.
@@jackfrost9512 The article bans the use of animals or theirs carcasses as bombs, or more specifically, booby-traps, check it out: hrlibrary.umn.edu/instree/1980d.htm so it probably includes dolphins. I could find some things about military trained dolphins, just like dogs, but the only thing about exploding ones is some allegation that Iran was trying it or something. Also Wikipedia said that the USA tried using bats and pigeons, while the bomb dogs were an soviet idea.
@@deadmeme897 yep, USSR used explosive dogs during WWII to blow up Nazi tanks. They specifically trained dogs to leap beneath the tanks because the bottom is the weakest part of any tank. While this sounds horrible and wondrous at the same time, this tactic wasn't really effective. Most of the time bombs blew up on the open field, and sometimes even beneath the friendly Soviet tanks, as dogs doesn't have any distinction between Nazi and Soviet vehicles
Clearly the only way to prevent this is a full scale napalm bombardment
@@loganreed23 soviet tanks ran on diesel, nazi tanks ran on petrol, so the dogs did have a way to distinct them(the smell of the burnt fuel), but the soviets trained them on their own tanks, so that's why they blew soviet tanks up, they only recognised them as targets
Ulfric: "Deliver this axe to Jarl Balgruuf."
Dragonborn: _De-livers Jarl Balgruuf with the axe._
The esteemed Jarl of Windhelm has my answer, he can shove it up his ass.
@@ameliakyle7054 shove his axe up his ass!
... I'll let myself out...
I’m offended by this comment. Please delete
It's Jarl Ballin', get it right. xD
Got to thinking... maybe I'm the Dragonborn, and I just don't know it yet?
"Collateral pacifism" is the funniest shit ever.
"Ulfric's right-hand man, Galmar Stonecock" - Legate Rikke
Glad I wasn't the only one who did a double take.
22:45 Galmar: Put the fear of the nine into those motherfuckers.
13:50
Legate Thicke
Ayyyyyy yeah
"Violates the Geneva Suggestion" swear to God this channel has the funniest content and not a word spoken.
Like the tf2 medics background.
"Born in Stuttgart, Germany, during an era where the hippocratic oath had been downgraded to an optional hippocratic suggestion"
"suggestion"
"Deploy the IEDog"
The real question is what is the Geneva convention
He does talk on some of the dark souls challenges
Killed the final boss of the DLC just to clear a bandit camp. What a legend.
“Sorry I didn’t make it to the wedding honey, I got kidnapped by a Daedric abomination after clipping out of reality”
" *Sigh* Yeah, I figured something like this would happen knowing you."
This is making me want a Backrooms mod now
lmao, still calling them honey after literally not showing up to the wedding
@@caelum9471
Yes!!
13:50 "Ulfric's right-hand man, Galmar Stonecock..."
Ah yes, good ol' Galmar Stonefi- wait.
Looks like he isn’t just known for his hands
He didn't stutter...
XD
I had to do a double take
Just noticed that at 0:25 as well
I like how the Imperial starting quest is “there’s this fort we really want to garrison, it would be important for the civil war” and the stormcloak quest is “uhhh go kill an ice snake”
there's a theory that they only want true nords in the army (as well as Skyrim in general) so they rigged the entry exam in their favor due to their natural frost resistance
Kinda funny, I feel like it's to weed out any non-nords. Nords resist ice.
@@wadespencer3623
If you're not a Nord, Galmar gives you frost resist potions. The trial is surprisingly fair for all races, and also really easy because he also gives you 3 really strong poisons specifically meant to cheese the Frost Wraith.
He gives this stuff to EVERYONE
"So, why are you joining the legion as a nord of Skyrim?"
"Well you know, enemies can't swim sooo.... here I am"
This video is just
_You've been hit by_
_you've been struck by_
_a war criminal_
Well, technically, he didn't hit anyone, so...
Do do, d-dodo, d-dodo, dd-dodo---do
*SHAMUNAH*
He didnt hit him physically, but they did get hit with the "HEE HEE"
Criminal criminal criminal
Ulfric squaring up in front of Tullius before killing him and being like "Tullius must be getting nervous..." is what a true son of Skyrim would say.
I like how the pacifist route takes even more lives than a normal gameplay
Reminds me of that Rick and Morty episode where Morty wanted to save the fart cloud from being assassinated, and ended up causing the deaths of thousands of people in the process.
Mirrak : "so dragonborn , you have arrived
Right into my ha"
Dragonborn: *steals mirrak's clothes and runs away*
Mirrak: ffs
Mirrak: "Can't have shit in Apocrypha.."
"This is the third time this week"
@@smasher_vlogs7469 "And it's just monday!"
@@TheTexasDice Being Mirrak must really suck 😂
You came across dimensional boundaries, broke physics and logic, and skipped your own wedding... just to take my robes.
Yes.
*disgruntled sigh*
6:48: I swear, the "it just works" joke never gets old
Great video, but i think there was easier option
1. Imperials have "voice of emperor' which stops targets from fighting
2. You can dismiss companions
So
1.Go to the fort
2. VOE
3. Dismiss companion
4. Apply " fury " spell on your former companion
And make sure to sneak at a proper distance to not aggro the former, infuriated, companion.
@@thaias9654 or become a vampire and go invisible.
But that requires not being a Nord
you got owned on youre strat by a fucking random comment lmao
Ymfah content also contain editing and stuff, dude.
How to pacifist run a civil war
Step 1, steal from prisoners
Step 2, steal from eldritch wizards
Step 3, preform technical gymnastics around the term 'Pacifist'
Step 4, be in the general vicinity during the commitment of war crimes
Step 5, break the laws of physics with a sickening *crack*
I love how the game becomes progressively more "naked" at the video goes on.
13:50 "Ulfric's right-hand man, Galmar Stonecock" enough said
Legendary edit
lol, thought I was hearing wrong. xd
There is like 10 changed lines like that one. Which is just damn great.
Buying a male companion just to marry him and not show up on the wedding is the ultimate chad move.
Chad AF
Pro gamer move
and all that was essential to the plan of winning a civil war
@Sightless_Seeker Big brain time
@xBirds Considering the numerous war crimes commited in this campaign, I think that a bit of homophobia is the least of *THE NEGOTIATOR'S* concerns.
although the one war crime with killing surrendering enemies is kinda negated as in skyrim if you don't kill them while surrendering they attack again (faking surrender is also a war crime) :D
NPCs with 1 HP: I Submit, please don't kill me!
NPCs with 2 HP: I AM INVINCIBLE
"How many people did you kill ?"
"0"
"Oh, ehm , how many war crimes?"
"Yes"
Isn't a war crimes if you win
Asking how many people a soldier killed is normal, asking how many war crimes they commited is weird
@@KorliWolf To be fair, recieving an answer of “zero” when asking how many they killed is not normal, either.
@@Damini368 i guess that would have to depend on what they did during the war. Like if they just managed the planes on a carrier ship, and never got into an actual fire fight then that wouldnt be wierd, but if they where an actual soldier and got into fire fights, then yeah that would be wierd
Our savior, our king, the cheese flavored Dragonborn has returned
Let me tell ya, this boy makes videos like nobody else, I already rewatched his channel like 3 times? Every time he releases new video about skyrim its just like a small burst of joy for me.
Thank you ymfah.
@@XeroXid1337 i feel exactly same bro.
@@XeroXid1337 there are many amazing channels, but for one to make people rewatch the entire channel (I've done it once or twice with ymfah already) is truly something special. This guys content is just so perfect
Fun Fact: During "Battle for Whiterun" you can run away like a coward and quest will end and not fail, but you will not get any reward.
Psst. Hey, I know who you are. Hail Sithis!
@@whiterunguard7853kill him, he’s with the Dark Brotherhood! (I always destroy the brotherhood on good play through
@@RevanReborn3950BBYexcept you actually don’t. Night mother, Keeper, and Babette always survive to rebuild on a destroy playthrough
20:34 “the esteemed jarl of windhelm can shove it up his ass”
These videos kill me
🤣🤣🤣🤣
I was looking for a comment like this its so funny
I was not expecting that sentance
I just started laughing my head off at 4 am. Genuinely thought it wasn't serious 💀
I love how you simply show wiki entry about "unobtainable" robes that you have just regretfully obtained (10:55)
Presumably, nobody on the wiki had thought to apply the wedding glitch to that scene.
The wiki people are sane while Ymfah is a genius
@@LonelySpaceDetective finna use the wedding glitch to obtain that executioner's gear I've wanted since I first booted skyrim
@@kek848
KEEP. ME. POSTED!
Lemme know if you can pull it off! I'm gonna try for Psijic Robes once I redownload the game
16:40
Dragonborn: "I'm back!"
*Holds up bloody axe
Ulfric: "So what did the Jarl have to- why is it coated in blood?"
Dragonborn: "I 'delivered' the axe. You know wink wink."
Ulfric: "You- did you KILL HIM!?"
Dragonborn: "Well yeah, isn't that what you meant?"
Ulfric: "NO! It's a Nord tradition! It's a challenge!"
Dragonborn: "Oh..."
Galmar: "Gods is that his EYEBALL on it!?"
Pacifist runs in a nutshell:
"Not my fault lol"
Pacifism, also known as the act of letting another inflict violence upon others as long as it gets you through the quest
I've always liked that Hanako picture. Excellent taste.
congrats, your comment now has 1 thousand likes. I figured I should let you know
May I ask, what's your pfp
throws a brick at someone's head and kills them "not my fault he was in the way of my brick"
"Complete annihilation."
"And what happened to your unit?"
"Complete... annihilation."
Tfs dbz reference ❤️
Dodoria
Dodoria: *sees Bardock flying in the distance
Oh fuck...
That switch from stonefist to stonecock was so beautifully subtle.
"You stand accused of murder-by-exploding-dog."
"Hey man I just summon the dogs don't blame me if when they explode sometimes people die."
Skyrim: "seems legit."
I want a summon Star Platinum mod
@@dysphoria_1.040 me too.
"In the famous words of ghandi, let someone else do it"
Never has a quote made me reconsider my actions against anakin so much
"Let some else do it" as per in the video
To be fair you did let the lava kill him for you, it just did a shit job.
@@iainhansen1047 I once pushed a clone off a roof once, but i didn't kill him gravity did
Stop Panakin
It's not your fault, it's the high ground's
Do we ignore the fact that he used stormcloak armor when joining the imperial and vice versa
To be fair, Stormcloak armor is pretty ass
@@TaikaJamppa You do realize the Stormcloaks have literally the worst equipment in the game right? Like, statistically, their curiass gives 21 points compared to the 23 of an imperial armor, their cuffs and boots are 5 points Vs the 7 of an Imperial, and their helmet is 1 point weaker too.
They also lack Heavy Armour and to add insult to injury you cannot even get a Stormcloak helmet at helgen. Literally the only reason why you would want to join them in the first place is so you can loot the Imperial statistically superior armoury AND weaponry given the Imperial Grade.
And this isn't even taking into account the lore related, in universe political implications of joining the Stormcloaks unironically given their Status as "More Subtly Fascist Fallout New Vegas Legion," this is just mechanics really.
@@travelkingable I respect u dude
@@travelkingable dude, its just a game. No need to go full asperger
@@AndreLuis-gw5ox dude, its just his opinion. No need to be a dick about it
"Geneva Suggestion"
Don't think we didn't see that.
Geneva convention is more like “guidelines.”
@@LeTtRrZ so as long as you’re a hot girl with million simping for you, you can break any and all guidelines without having any consequences? Huh, neat
"All warfare is based" -Sun Tzu
"The supreme art of war is to subdue the enemy without posting cringe"
- *_Sun Tzu_*
The supreme art of war is to subdue the enemy without killing anyone in Skyrim.
-not Sun Tzu lma
"If you know the enemy and know yourself you need not fear the results of a hundred battles" -Still Sun Tzu
@@shreyanshsingh379 "You see, I used an ancient deceptive technique, its called LYING" -Sun Tzu, the art of war
“Quoting Sun Tzu is tiny pp cringe” - Donald J. Trump
"Threaten to pacify them." is like my favorite quote.
these dialogue voicecuts are golden. Its like they would actually say these things😂
“Let us taste that sexy voice”
Ulfric right hand man, Galmar stonec*ck...
“You can return this axe to our friend. The esteemed Jarl of Windhelm can shove it up his *ss”
Check out the 'Gamer Poop' series on UA-cam, it's essentially all dialogue cuts like that
"You can tell the _esteemed_ Jarl of Windhelm to *shove it up his ass!"*
I love how much effort goes into these challenge runs. They're like the antithesis of all those "CaN u BeAt FalLoUt wItH tWo LiTeRs OfF pIsS??" videos that clog up and ruin the integrity of somebody pushing an engine beyond its limits just to see if you could. Not to mention the editing, oh my god, not only are all the videos fully edited with memes and references, theyre set up to actually tell a narrative! Ymfah is a top tier content creator.
How dare you insult Mitten “Hot narrator Voice” Squad?
@@anonsdad2196 Unbelievable
"pushing an engine beyond it's limits" yeah many parts of this video and some of the other ones he made go beyond pushing the limits and simply shatter the game. this video has the most examples of this and the most agrigious ones but all of them have some examples. what i mean is that the entire video is filled with glitches that make no sense that someone will figure them out
edit: tell me for what reason and under what circumctanses would someone find out most of these. i know that glitch hunters exist but in the cases of the claw doors while the glitch is possible it's unbelivably hard to make and so: how do people figure it out?
@@goatass3402 Todd posts them in 4chan glitch threads every now and then
@@goatass3402 I mean, the bucket and cauldron is just basic troll physics, everyone obviously did it on their first play-through. Wait, what do you mean you didn't? Aww man, I didn't wanna be the bearer of bad news...
I love how he uses the phrase “imperial scum” and “rebel scum” both in the same video
Which faction do you support: the racists, The racists, or the racists
@@Skullhawk13lmaooooo
FOR THE EMPIRE! FOR THE LEGION!
Imperial Soldiers: "Have you ever heard of the Geneva?"
Ymfah: "Who's she, and why should I care?"
'Geveva'? I never even met ah!
Alternate title: "Speedrun Geneva Convention Violations Any%"
Ehem... You mean Geneva Suggestion.
-Should I finish 'em?
-No, let them burn, it' the pacifist run
The US isnt actually bound by the Geneva Convention, they didn’t sign it, but everyone else was too afraid to make them at the time.... thought that was mentionable
@@justincoltharp9701 The U.S. is bound by the Genova Convention; they signed it in 1949, ratified in 1955.
@@crazycreeper888 I must be thinking of a separate set of accords.
I love how they include all the mistakes and dead-ends, it really brings you along for the ride. Amazing voice edits too. All-round incredible editing, I instantly fell in love with this channel.
I like how this takes all of what ymfah's learned from all of their other challenges and applies it together, like this is a culmination of all their efforts.
34:23 Legate Taurinus Duilis, the absolute Imperial Chad, after seeing a dragon fly over him:
*takes out bow* "Hmmm hmmm..."
"Another day, another -Septim- Dragon."
"hmmm hmmm...."
"hmmm hmmm?!"
"hmmm hmmm...."
"hmmm hmmm."
"HMMM HMMM?!?!?!"
Big Gough energy
When he said "Hmmm hmmm..." and looked up I immediately knew it was a dragon
I love how ymfah changes the civil war from Imperials vs Stormcloaks to Shirts vs Skins
Me: "Oh, another Ymfah video!"
Ymfah: "Climb in back and we'll be off!"
“Tulius must be getting nervous...” - Ulfric Stormcloak, standing inches away from General Tulius
The leaders of the storm cloak rebellion losing to a naked women with her bare hands is a very accurate representation of what it feels like siding with the storm cloaks sometimes
Dragonborn: This... is a bucket
Skyrim: Dear god
There's more.
I approve of this reference so highly, you have no idea
@@MasterXehanort1000 Noo
13:50 "Galmar Stonecock."
That was so smooth I almost didn't notice it.
I didnt and asked myself then did that happen? xD
"Naked man runs into battle, casts spell to calm everyone down, steals the weapons and clothes off his enemies' bodies, then casts another spell to resume the fight" is genuine roleplay material though
Ymfah: Putting the "Civil" in civil war since 2 years ago
I love how the different clutter items are special-purpose tools for flying with different properties. Skyrim's developers are truly geniuses for including such hidden features.
And some people really think levitate was removed entirely lol
The reason levitate was hidden in buckets is bc we gotta keep it a secret from the imperials bc according to imperial law levitating is illegal
Its all dwemer technology...
I love how you easily could use the shield bash or spiders from your other no killing videos but find new methods instead. It's wonderful
I love that every NPC that called you out for being naked was naked
I've played this game for almost a decade now, and I just NOW realized Galmar sends you to fight an ice wraith in the middle of an iceberg knowing Nords will have a far easier time at it for their natural resistance to the cold
He does it in the hopes any non Nord dies of hypothermia trying
those are the priorities lol. Racial purity first winning the war second. The Confederate strategy.
I was always under the assumption that it was a nord tradition, and he is just applying it as a recruitment test. Also, while he doesn't skirt around the oddity of a non-Nord fighting for Skyrim, he doesn't hate the idea. The gist of the conversation is "Why would a (non-Nord) fight for the stormcloaks?" Your character replys "Skyrim is my home, and I will die protecting it" to which he replies "Aye, that's as good of a reason as any." And the entire thing is dropped.
@@haroldbalzac6336 he also says "usually we send new recruits to train before accepting them but for you let's do something a little different" or something like that
Granted he also sends Nord Dragonborns to do it but like I said a Nord has a far easier time completing it than an Argonian or Elf
@@Zerum69 I guess but it might be to prove to him that your character (Nord/non-Nord) can fight in Sub-Zero temperatures.
Galmar actually explains why the test is how it is if you ask about it after completion. The ice wraith killing is meant to be breezed through effortlessly with the poisons he provides, with the real test being the act of reaching the Serpent Stone through the tundra, to test one's resolve for the cause.
The test is essentially meant to be as harmless as physically possible if you're serious about the cause and/or have a warm coat. It literally is about annoying the test takers with a long, cold hike and seeing if they have the nerve to put up with that annoyance. In contrast, Rikke sending out one person to clear out an entire fort is pretty messed up to the point of being a suicide mission for anyone whose not a plot armored player character (because like hell any normal recruit can do that). What's also hilarious is that without any survival mods with freezing mechanics, Galmar's test is completely effortless since the whole point of it isn't a non-modded game mechanic.
'Shame none of the prisoners made it"
I almost died lmfao
You never said when the ghandi quote stops, so I've been reading all of the subtitles as grandiose quotes
"20 gold for the ride" is my favorite so far
What 20 gold? Those damn tavern wench is ripping me off. She said 60 for a ride damn.
@@Chronostra
60? She fuckin told me it was 90 gold!
*Shows Miraak's robes*
"Oh this is going to be tedious"
*"We don't actually have to fight him"*
"Oh you have GOT to be kidding me!"
This, this is why I love skyrim. In all it's glitches and broken gameplay mechanics, you can always find a unique way to play. This is beautiful.
"I swear my Eldrich powers killed him, not me"
"Not my fault he hit me. I wasn't even fighting back. Should've known I'd explode in tentacles"
Soldier: "You are a war hero!"
Ymfah: "Thank you."
Soldier: "man... I can still see the faces of all the people I killed it is horrible! Do you?"
Ymfah: "I didn't ki- yeah..."
Soldier: "It sucks... but at least we were honorable and gave them a good death. War crimes are unacceptable."
Ymfah: "Uh..."
Soldier: "what?"
Ymfah: "...Nothing."
777 likes?
@@insertunoroginalnamehere6189 oops
@@loloclaw don't tell me u changed the likes
@@insertunoroginalnamehere6189 changed it back 🤣
@@loloclaw good. Was just about to say the greybeards were wrong to choose you... But i think they made the right choice.
I both find it incredibly irritating yet completely on-brand for ymfah to go through the Dragonborn DLC to fail at getting Miraak's robes instead of just grabing Targe of the Blooded to clear out the fort for the Imperials
Yeah but that's boring and all the videos would feel the same if they did that every time
I think the best thing about your videos is that you also show the methods that don't work. it really adds to how dedicated you are to making sure you achieve the challenge
It's also funny and lets us know why certain things were done.
im sure there's a daedric prince out there who's astounded and amazed by your tribute
There probably is
Ymfah is a disciple of Sheo
prob sheogorath
Sheagorath
Either Sheogorath or Clavicus Vile.
Sheo because of the sheer absurdity and, well, madness of it all.
Clavicus Vile because Ymfah did exactly what he set out to do in the most indirect manner possible, bringing an end to the civil war without bringing any _direct_ harm to his opponents, besides maybe psychological.
Clavicus Vile has a very indirect method of granting his followers' wishes, ranging from giving one of them an axe to cure his daughter's lycanthropy, and curing vampirism by having his followers annihilated by an unknowing dragonborn, answering their prayers in perhaps the most indirect way possible.
Fun fact for those who have read this far down; the Voice Actor for Clavicus Vile is the same person who voices the Mister Handies from Fallout. _let that sink in for a moment._
Another pacifist tip: when taking over forts, after you meet up with your fellow soldiers, you can just stand back and watch them storm the fort. Don't worry if they die; more of them will appear out of thin air until the fort is taken.
Man: "i dont see any signs of him being this.. Dragonborn.."
Ymfah: Fus!!
Everyone: kill him!!!
At 20:19? Yeah, I heard "I don't see any signs of HER..."
Does it even matter?
HE IS A WITCH
i like the touch when you go as an imperial to Windhelm and as a Stormcloak to Solitude. The real pacifistic immersion
I don't see enough mentions of how much of a genius you are. Your music choices, efforts, voice editing (stonecock), and your comedic timing are simply amazing
The music kills me. The Skrillex-esque version of sans., the Mario version of We Are Number One - absolutely brilliant.
10:58 "but is unobtainable"
You are so good you prove the wiki wrong!
Can I just say how much I appreciate the way you use music? Whenever I recognise where something is from I get this little spark of joy, plus it always makes it super entertaining to watch every video again!
I love how he finds new ways to complete his challenges
I mean, he could just use the spiders which kill without leaving a stat (see The Dark Brotherhood without killing), but he spent a bunch of time trying to get Mirak's Robes via a combination of glitches, which in the end, didn't even work.
I can just imagine Ymfah having Vietnam flashbacks after seeing that he probably has to kill Miraak to complete the run
I like that he shows failed ideas to show that it wasn't just a one and done, he went through multiple concepts to get the end result. Also that he uses different "features" for every video so it isn't all more of the same
20:17 I don't see any signs of her being this, what, Dragonborn.
Any signs of her.
Her.
Wut.
ymfah chose a really hot female protagonist for this
I thought that's what I heard as well glad to know im not going crazy
He forgot to read the subtitles
I think ymfah dubbed the female voice line over the game as a joke
Extremely well edited and all the music makes this more entertaining. You earned a like and a sub.
How about tree fiddy?
Out of all edits, "galmur stonecock" was among your most subtle.
- So.. you do all the thing of perfect touch and miraak just for a mask and leave everyone naked?
*- YES*
"Did you know? War crimes are OK as long as you win!"
words to live by, indeed
If you commit one war crime, might as well commit all of them to up your chances as much as possible
@@jackfrost9512 Makes you wonder about that quote from General Patton after beating the Nazis; "We defeated the wrong enemy."
The allies after torturing and executing POWs, burning down civilian cities, and sinking Red Cross ships repeatedly
Sibbi Black Briar: "I caught a man trying to pickpocket me while I was in prison and then he phased through his cell with a bucket."
"I've seen some shit."
Any war conflict in Europe: starts
Switzerland: *title of the video*
"Tullius must be getting nervous"
Tullius, about to get executed while surrendering: *nervous sweating*
"30 gold? Screw that noise"
*currently has a thousand gold in inventory*
20:09 “You really ought to put some clothes on.”
*Entire town is naked*