@@daviedood2503 it's not being scared of medical things or things like that it's the fact that you want to be an artist and you procracinate alot and if you continue to do this you'll turn around and you're already ,50 still procrastinating and not pursuing your dream as an artist
@@daviedood2503 I ask myself that everyday, but then I remember that I have a chronic anxiety disorder. Sometimes there's just not a logical reason to be scared, but the feeling is there.
@@demi42899 if it's medical I can understand. It's chemical biology happening. Otherwise it's psychologically freaking yourself out. Ppl can make something bigger and worse than what it really is. This is why @ssholes have a somewhat better peace of mind. They just don't give a f. I HAD to adopt this skill set. Stress and worry like that actually does something phsycial to your body. It literally can make you sick. Not to mention shorten your life. No art career or "would be would not be" potential is worth my life. I personally just want to be very good at it to make art for myself, friends and family to enjoy. And any public person who may come across it. I don't care for working for a company. THEY WILL suck the joy out of it all and turn what I love into a chore that will make me hate it. If I HAPPEN to make something and it goes into a game or poster, hey cool but I don't have expectations of it. I just... Go.. And do. I don't have expectations for anything or anyone really. That way you'll never stress and be let down. If they don't ever do it or hold up to their word hey cool I didn't expect them to. This way I'm ALWAYS suprised if it comes through bc it was never EXPECTED. Expecting to be a high paid artist, expecting this and that can and will lead to stress and diapointment. Just make what YOU love and enjoy and the speed and quality will come. BUT you have to be consistent. Meaning draw each day if u can. Make time to get atleast 1 doodle in if it's not some landscape or portrait etc. Alot of times you have to give your brain a break. THINGS HAPPEN when you stop for a moment. The brain processes things subconsciously. While you're doodling you'll get this AH HA! moment. I LOOOOVE those. I'd get them all the time when I was younger. Now that I have more experience in various things, they come alot fewer and long time lengths, but when they DO happen, WOW are they profound.
@@krzys2sokyami681 well, being raised by a mother who was both a fine artist and computer programmer (with a degree in both), I take this very much to heart. Thank you Krzys :)
"What does the thought of drawing make me feel right now?" Usually a multitude of different things: 1 - I'm not good enough for my own ridiculously high standards so I would only disappoint myself. 2 - I lost so much time not drawing (I didn't really start until late high school) that I'll never get good enough so why try. 3 - If I loved it or was meant to do it, I would have the drive and hunger to do it more often, wouldn't I? 4 - If I got good, I'd have to be consistently good to maintain work and I don't know if I can do that because I lack practice. 5 - It feels like all my ideas are derivative and what's the point if I can't make something unique to myself? Its a vicious self-defeating cycle. I know a lot of this is just my brain fighting against productivity though. If I don't practice, I don't get better, even though the brain prefers the comfort and perceived stability of not doing things. I think video games provide an easier or at least more structured drip feed of the feelings of accomplishment -- Dark Souls is hard but there's a clear road to victory, whereas with art, you have no idea if something you're making will come out right or just the way you want it, or whether other people will like it. Games are like a well-lit obstacle course in their own self-contained gyms, but sometimes art feels more like getting lost in the woods in the dark and only occasionally finding drinkable water or shelter on the good days. That's a bit too melodramatic though, isn't it? Maybe the thought of taking it so seriously is what holds me back. I psych myself out of making things because I suck all the fun out of creation by worrying that its good enough or unique enough.
I have the same problem, I love drawing but sometimes I just can't because I feel like if I draw I'll disappoint myself and I will start hating art, and I don't want that so I stop drawing to keep loving art..
I feel the exact same way, I haven't done anything in almost five years because the enjoyment I got out of trying to make anything wasn't worth the blowback and depression from failing. So I quit.
man I can't tell you how hard that list hit. It feels so futile making the decision to start what seems like an endlessly uphill battle when I a) don't really believe I have what it takes to make it and b) don't know what will be the result of even my best efforts. It's unhealthy and self-defeating. With videogames, there's always the promise that there IS an ending and that with enough persistence you'll get to it, and if you can't, you can always just play another game.
@@GlitzPixie Games offer a sense of accomplishment and a rigid structure that you can practice things in to get better. There's rules for every game world, and even with random generations like roguelikes, the basic framework is there and you can practice mechanics until it becomes familiar and routine despite whatever upgrades you get. Playing against other people adds another layer of randomness, but you're all still playing with the same rules and you can at least guess what they can or would do within those rules. Art doesn't have those boundaries unless you set them for yourself though, and that can be liberating or paralyzing in its freedom. Wanna draw hyper realistic? Cartoony? Do 3D? Animate? Sculpt? There's fundamentals but the skillsets vary largely. Wanna try something different? You might be starting from square 1. Or at least square 2.5. That's not necessarily a bad thing though, and learning new skills is never a bad thing. The last thing I want is for my comments to discourage others though. Its just the way it made me feel in the past, but I'm trying to overcome those feelings and my legitimate problems with procrastination, fear, and laziness because I really *do* want to get better and I hope others who want the same can push through as well. We all want to express ourselves. Finding the voice you want to speak with is difficult but worthwhile. Don't give up, guys. I believe in everyone but myself, lol. =P
This was just perfect timing. A friend made me aware of the imposter syndrome, which is a personality type that expects oneself to be a natural genius and when you can't get something right first time you feel like a fraud and a failure. I constantly run away from drawing cos I just feel crap about myself, that I'm wasting my time cos how could I ever be successful? So I waste my time playing games cos that's success, right? ;)
I recently listened to the episode on Procrastination on the wonderful podcast called Ologies which basically said I needed therapy to stop my type of procrastination (linked to imposter syndrom and anxiety lol). Now procrastinating on getting a therapist, so I guess UA-cam videos and random human advice will have to do XD
It absolutely IS success, and it's meaningful success - it's just limited by the game you play. You achieve this awesome achievement, feel awesome - then you turn the game off and the only thing to do at that point is look for another game, right! I still love playing games, but I keep myself focused on the paintings on my wall - the permanent imprints of myself I'm leaving behind for others to witness and enjoy. Unfortunately that's the one thing that games can't provide us with (YET!! - and that's a big YET!)
I'd recommend Carol Dweck's books/UA-cam video about the growth mindset. There's a good 45 minute video on youtube you can listen to. I'll post a link if you are interested but can't find it
@@Fyrebirdi ua-cam.com/video/-71zdXCMU6A/v-deo.html Impact Theory with Tom Bileau is another great resource. Remember that almost every fulfilled, successful artist will tell you it's possible...but we gotta accept responsibility and put in the work :)
My name is Adam, I didn’t come here for a once over on quitting smoking which I have been desperately trying to do - but when he said his name like someone would say his, I looked up and almost cried. It cut to my core and now I’m standing here next to fish and potatoes, just having put out a cigarette, and I feel like I’m floating between two possible worlds. Thank you Adam, for not just your inspiration to draw again but to be spoken to in a different way that I needed. It was an incredible coincidence, and I’m grateful. Power to you man.
I smoke, too. I've been a weed and alcohol addict for awhile but I felt like cigarettes were a good compromise to replace them because they didn't "intoxicate" me. My whole family's full of smokers and I've seen them quit one by one. Not all, but it's inspiring. This video is such a treasure because although it's unfortunate for anyone to become sick, it serves a very intense example. You look young, I know you can pull through and find something to replace it that will make you healthier and happier. Much love!
Yes, you can do it. The moment you decide that you will do it, you have chosen a new path, one towards your own happiness and your own fulfillment. That's the most important step. If you smoke 1, 2, 10, 100, 1000 cigarettes on your way to quitting, it's all ok. You don't have to be the perfect version of yourself now - or ever. As long as you keep steering towards your goal, you will eventually get there. And that's exactly as it should be. Safe Travels, my friend.
Keep it up man I'm trying to quit myself. Started at 18 and I'm 26 now. Smoke like 4-6 cigarettes a day and I'm already not the healthiest person to begin with. Its a fucking weird feeling when you suddenly snap back into like an aware state as you stare at your cigarette and wonder what the fuck have you been doing sucking these things in for years... Also doesnt help I also smoke weed quite a bit so I just have a terrible amount of smoke going into my system all the time and my brain has probably associated the THC, nicotine and the release of dopamine together in some jumbled mess.
During this quarantine I realized I’ve been using art so much to procrastinate on school work that I almost can’t do art without having to procrastinate for something else
put your school work first, or maybe a good balance between the two (school and art), and consider doing something art related as a job in the future, because for many of us art was a hobby to begin with. (I used to draw and watch anime instead of school-work) :) good luck!!
@altkovac school made worst years of my life a million times worse and gave back nothing usefull in exchange. Also ruined my interest to art till I got 23. The best thing you can do at school is not to let it hurt you. I hope that education system is better in the developed countries, but I doubt it.
Art in this instance is your gaming. It really applies to anything really, whether it be sports or work. You really just need the insight to separate what needs to be done from what doesn't. And once you find what needs to be done, engross yourself in it; the feeling of feeling your goal will propel you. Glad i watched this fantastic vid.
I feel happy when i draw, i feel like i can do something and be something, i feel like I’m the best when i draw i feel confident when i draw but at the same time i feel unconfident i feel like I’m nothing and i feel like i will never live up to my standards and achieve my dreams
Crazy how my job is revolving around videogames but this video still helped me open up my eyes more to how I could be a more constant with my craft I appreciated all of this fr man. Great stuff and you've got some amazing talent
Its really funny, it's 3 in the morning for me right now. I've been having a hard time sleeping because I keep thinking about how I'm not producing enough art. I give myself so much shit for it that it makes sense that I'm not having fun with my art anymore. It's not even that I'm struggling when it comes to starting a drawing, but I get impatient with myself about finishing and posting. I end up getting so emotional that I get fed up and just stop midway. I'm still trying to figure out how to not drag myself through the dirt when it comes to doing art, but not guilt tripping myself is certainly a start. Thank you for this video, it helps to hear your words of wisdom on this topic. Hope your safe and heathly!
It's so funny how strangers can capture someone else's feelings so effortlessly. I've been going through (practically word for word) what you've been going through. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one.
@@dmitryhuskov It's not just me. People around me tease me that I could've been a millionaire if only I did what I can do. I mean I even got plans, sources and opportunities, I just don't take action on them.
This is so incredibly true. I had a period of my life during the school holidays where I drew every single day. I managed to distance myself from video games for about a week and then suddenly, the art started flowing. It was the most productive period of my life. I had an entire sketchbook filled with work ready for my education the next year by the end of those holidays and I was so incredibly proud.
Habits are like water channels we carve in mud. The more times you do something, the deeper the channel is carved, until the water flows without you even having to think about it. Take a hard and intentional look at what channels you have carved and if they're flowing in the direction you want your life to go. Developing a new habit/behavior means coming back every day and carving out this new channel for the water to flow. At first it will be hard, and if you stop too soon you'll lose all your progress, but the more you do it, the easier it gets, until before you know it the water is flowing in this new direction as effortlessly as it did before.
*Clicking on this video, expecting the usual "Just do it!" speach I always get." Lucid: "Yeah just do it but here's an in-depth rambling explanation of why" Me: Oh, coolio.
I can totally relate to your reaction - althouuuuuugh... in all attempts not to sound like a tool "just do it" is actually a great way to get over humps - just saying!
Basically make more, consume less. Forcing yourself to start the engine, then going with the flow. Thank you very much for this. Something like this was shared on the channel Improvement Pill.
8:30 It always boggled my mind how I could enjoy super hard games where you would basicly hit your head against the wall for hours with no progress at all, but even just now thinking of doing that with something productive makes me feel terrible. My first association when you said what does drawing make you feel was something like "inadequate" (or a less nice word for that)
I wonder, is it because the path ahead is clear, it's just a matter of execution? You have confidence that with enough tries, you will eventually prevail, because you have done so before, because this is Something You Are Good At? Or perhaps because your performance is private, you can fail as many times as you like with no judgement?
Exactly! It only makes sense that there's an emotional barrier or fear that's holding you back. And inadequacy is a huge common feeling we feel (myself included - daily!!). I have learned to regard this feeling of inadequacy (also known as "impostor syndrome") as an occupational hazard - we're emotional beings and we need to rationalize our own feelings sometimes - observe ourselves from a 3rd person perspective and see our self-doubt objectively - then address it and keep painting :)
Jonathan Caridia Progress is just easier to see in video games. You fight a hard boss and lose. Okay next time I won’t Aggro whelps, or get tail swiped. Tries again. Dies again, but got boss damaged much further. You can easily see theses small victories. With art, it not only takes so much more time to build the knowledge base, but it also takes a lot of time to even know where to begin. When you finally begin, it is very difficult to see your own progress because your in the middle of it all. This then leads to many negative thoughts and sometimes complete abandonment of Art. As I believe was mentioned in regards to beginners, once you finally push through and learn the fundamentals, it gets “easier” to know what and how to make progress. I’d imagine at that point it is like crafting recipes.
That's because games have clear paths, and understandable achievable progress. In games, you can easily learn what itens to equip, what attacks to avoid, what skills to pick, everything you need to reach a GARANTEED success, such as defeating that bitch boss who took you over 100 tries, all so you can move on to the next, VERY CLEARLY STATED chapter of the story. In real life, it's not like that... it's not all that simple, things are in constant change, thus making it much harder to do anything. Time and literally everything else is against you, and you have to constantly adapt, which may cause you to be overwhelmed. And even if you achieve what you wanted, you might not know the applications for it, not have the opportunity to use it, or literally have something entirely out of your control, such as a relative's death, fuck you over, making you feel like every moment you passed improving yourself was a waste. That's why, in my view.
Sometimes to just recognize that you dont have the capacity at the moment to have perspective about the feelings you’re experiencing at the moment. It helps tremendously, it lifts the weight off a bit and let’s you know that whatever that feeling is you can always come back to it later and inspect it with a clearer head. What you’re feeling doesn’t 100% reflect on what’s objectively going on.
This is the best advice I've ever received and it honestly hurts how much I can relate. It's so easy to hate myself for filling my life with video games when I'm not doing coding or art, but everything feels so uncertain when I'm trying to tackle anything creative, and that scares me. I've been called a lazy ass and embedded it into my head twenty times more for each time I heard it. I'd make myself sick for not doing what I needed to do and fucking sitting it, hating myself more and more I kept doing what I was doing but the deeper I got into that mindset, the higher the hurdle went. The harder life got, and the more that the word 'lazy' got hammered into my brain. I've gotten much better over the past year but I still hate myself a lot, and I expect nothing more than failure most times I try to achieve things. It feels good to be able to wrap my head around why I acted the way I did, and why I act the way I do... And how that mindset is hurting me. Thank you.
I remember drawing so much around 2015-2016.. I LOVED to make art. I don't know when this changed, it could be when I started to be more critical with my art (e.g. Caring about proportions..) , the sense of guilt for not practicing the basics, of not improving.. It just hurts that actually I barely have the urge do draw, sometimes I can even start , but I give up after a try. In my mind I can't tolerate a ''bad drawing'' anymore. This shit is killing me because I didn't give up drawing!! Thanks for the video.
This goes way beyond drawing, as an engineering student who is struggling with motivation issues, I completely agree with all you've said. Especially the idea that you need to have good technique to express yourself. When all you are dealing with is technicalities on your work it is very difficult to stay motivated.
Thank you. Procrastination is a coping mechanism that can lead to unhealthy habit if we continue to follow the old program. It’s subconscious. I’ve been procrastinating so this is a perfect time for me to truly listen and get moving. Taking ACTION one step at a time despite the challenges to break free. Thank you. Blessings everyone. 🙏🏼🍀⚡️
I remembered when I could watching anime and youtube for almost a day. Similar to your smoking story, I know that it is bad, I know what I should do, and everyone said that there are something better to do. And fortunately, I watched Mel Robbins and she said that procrastination is a stress reliever. She recommends to just start even if then you only work for 5 minutes or less I did that! I tried to study just a few minutes per day(It was when I am in the last year of high school) and lot of times it lasted for 10 minutes to 1 hour. I started to learn math, because I like it but even though I like it I didn't study it. After days of consistent study, I got this reaction "Wth? It's just like that? This is simple". I felt that I'm doing it right! after boring session of study I finally understands it! that made me happy Then I learned that if I keep pushing myself trough this boring feel I will get what I wanted! Now I'm in college and we're studying Java. It is absolutely boring to study from hundreds of pages of books. But I know, if I keep studying then eventually I will understand. So, I stick to study those books. And after a couple of months, I understand java's basic, I finished Git course, I finished VIM book, and now I'm studying Data Structure and Algorithm in Java It's all because I know if I keep learning/doing, I will get that carrot edit: I still like to watch anime and yt or gaming, but now it is like I have control over when I have to do that or doing my daily target
I'm not like a visual artist, but your videos have recently been helping me put effort into completing the novel I'm trying to write. This video especially. I've been in that loop of constantly doing some work that I'd consider enough, be it a page or a chapter, then rewarding myself with games and shit that doesn't matter and I just didn't understand why It still took me so long to get going the next day. I get it now, I might be making a bit of progress each day, but I need to reach that state where the words just flow nonstop. I'm gonna distance myself from games and from my friends who spend all their time playing games for a little bit. Thanks.
Well I'm not sure if by "you're not an artist - but a writer", unless writing isn't your main profession - I'd call writing an art! But maybe you're writing something on the side of your main career. Either way though Foxy, a huge thank you :)
@Bones Sama Thank you for sharing man. Yeah It's really tough to start out without a system, I can almost count myself lucky that the virus is I guess, removing the obstacles in my way of working this out. I eventually want to be a career novelist so I'm getting a sort of trial run while my job has been closed. I haven't gotten to where I want to be though. But I get that it takes time and effort to get there. This really helps inspire though, so again, thanks!
This video is so relevant to me. I quit cigarettes a month ago and I will not go back. Smoked for 10 years and it was an emotional crutch. I’m finding my way back to my centered self with art.
As a musician that's in a terrible creative and psychological state this really calmed my mind and gave me the energy to just push trough to the reward threshold. Much love and respect man, I appreciate you so much.
As an aspiring artist who just cant seem to pick up my ipad due to a mix of these feelings, and ADHD, this video is exactly what i needed to hear right now, I always find these kinds of advice videos so helpful, thank you Adam.
He is talking about Painting and im trying to find a job so im not a burden to my family anymore But still ... The Moment he told my im not that Lazy Bastard my Family tells me all the time i am It almost brought tears to my eyes. Even though im not interested in Painting. This Video got recommendet to me and im really thankfull for this. And im really thankfull for this Video. So Thank you Adam. I really needed to hear that
90% of the battle is starting. Once you start something, you'll find it difficult to stop, because you build something. Forcing yourself to start is powerful. Make it easy for yourself.
I never agreed with this phrase because stopping and throwing my work away always was the easiest thing to do for me. No matter if it was a hobby, like art, or something I *had* to do, like studying physics, for example
And BAM! Just like that you were the one to give me the answer I was desperately looking for! The rewards aspect spoke to me the most, since I always asked myself what makes me struggle and wade through the muck that is learning how to play ridiculously difficult games (fighting games being chief among them). Even though I'm barely getting good enough to actually enjoy them, I still crave spending time on them because I care about becoming amazing at em. I guess I'll only get further in art and be actually dedicated if I employ the same ethic and remind myself of the rewards daily.
AS do I - I love playing games, but I keep my eyes on the artistic prize rather than the gaming prize - it's amazing how it'll make you drop your dpad and pick up a paintbrush. I abandon games for art all the time now (which feels like a miracle to me)
I feel the "tipping the scale" effect when leaning a new piano piece as well. The first few times I play through reading the sheet music feel scary, but once I know the piece I get this boost in confidence and I find it really easy to practice daily.
The part when you said " You need to stop blaming yourself " got to me the most, personally. Because I have been in a situation where a profesional said that I have " I am guilty " on my forehead. And whatever happens, if I am 10% involved or 100% involved in it, I will always think I am the one to blame for antyhing. And that is something I've been strugling with, even after being aware of it. Even though it is said that the first thing to solving a problem is acknowledging you have one, it is not said it will be and easy problem to solve. My thoughts on this video are with you. I have been listening to you for a while now, couple of months, and every word you spoke was on point, had a purpose and was thruthfull. It even helped, listening to your ways of doing things helped with working on my things. Keep it up, keep the positivity and sincere words, listening to them helps.
Thank you so much for your story and your thoughts. The worst enemy of progression is the constant guild of not doing enough. You saying that we need to let go of that feeling and be compassionate to ourselves pinpoints it presisely on how to overcome it. Keep making these amazing videos, as a young person, I really feel like I'm listening to a wise uncle haha
thanks for the words, I needed them. Ive been having problems with being productive and drawing because honestly, I realized drawing makes me feel I'm not good enough for my job, a good job that I get paid well for. and truth is I love this job, everyone is nice, it pays well and I get to work with something I love. I really needed to hear that to realize I earned my job
Thank you so much for this. I'm CONSTANTLY on myself for being lazy and while on the upside it means I've done loads of research into productivity, it also means that I'm so hard on myself I burn myself out before I even get to the meat of what I want to do. But lately I'm coming around to thinking that I need to be gentler and more encouraging to myself, because I really do want to create art, and I'm sad when I'm not at it regularly.
I am currently sitting at my desk; I had use a keyboard in order to do this justice. I am currently high after having smoked my last joint. I want to create so many things. I have so much negative emotions connected to my art that there was never any chance I could actually do it for fun. It was obligation. The guilt truly is real. Im writing this to say that I am going to make a goddamn change in my life. I refuse to let this stop me on my journey to achieve my dreams. Thank you for your wise words, they struck me to my core. I needed this sage information and those encouraging words to finally open my eyes. Clicking this video was the hardest thing i've had to do in a while, but I couldn't be more happy that I did. Please continue offering these kind of videos to people, its truly important.
I have this thing that whenever I paint or draw or make anything, I hate looking at it so much, it disgusts me. I could’ve painted the Mona Lisa and I would’ve said “she looks dodgy “ and thrown it away. It’s the reason I can’t do any art if I wanted to. It’s extremely annoying when u really want to feel good about having made something. A feeling of deep disappointment hits me....
Maybe you should try some exercises where you know the result will be shit, but you are still practicing. Like blind contour or very short timed sketches.
As long as you're self aware about that you will be consistently able to outsmart your irrational reaction. J mean, you say it yourself. It may not FEEL like enough, but if you can logically PROVE to yourself it is, than that's all you really need, isn't it?
I have this same impulse. What I found that helps me is - I treat it like it wasn't supposed to NOT be shitty in the first place. Like it was a learning experience - I paint and draw things multiple versions at once (ideally 3) so I have room to mess up different things in different versions and at the end treat it like - oooh I learned something from each one so that's okay. Then I gently set all paintings aside and forget they exist and after a while go back to them and sometimes they look better after I've had some space. And if they still suck I just name the mistakes I see so at least it really is something to learn from.
!WALL OF TEXT! Based on you saying "I can't do any art if I wanted to", I am guessing that you starting out with art (of course, I might be wrong, feel free to correct me). I have a question regarding this: How do you feel about other people looking at your own art? If you recieve compliments, do you generally accept them or do you just nod and still think about how your own art could be improved? Or rather, do you think about how much better a more skilled artist could have drawn the painting? How much you should improve on the flaws you percieve as massive? I found that having other people review my own artworks is something that kept me going. In fact, it is the reason I started to get serious with drawing in the first place. Knowing that someone might be looking at a drawing I made and being able to relate to the feelings I had when I drew it is really powerful. It is kind of funny to think about trying to improve just to hear more of these sweet and kind voices cheering you on, but a motivation is a motivation. Perhaps this is not the healthiest reason to pursue art, but I have always liked throwing my ego in a pit and going "Let's see how you can get out of this mess." The grind to get into the hyperfocus flow ultimately feeds into the grind of failing and improving. They are so deeply connected, yet feel so distant. I hope you are able to battle the struggle. It is not an easy task, but please remember that you are not the only one struggling. There are tons of people who are in the same boat as you are. You don't have to carry your dodgy drawings alone. :)
I needed your wisdom right now ... Asked my guides/angels to help this morning when I climbed up the hill .... I was told to write the book which keeps coming to me. This afternoon I found you talking about art and procrastination and the healing I will get from using colors, textures, shapes and tones as I paint with oils .... miracles come quietly to me as I open my heart.... thank you for your inspiration and sharing. Your words are true.÷))
For me, it feels like it's not my laziness stopping me, it's my *anxiety*, the *people* around me constantly mocking me and making fun of me whenever I try and do something, pick up my sketch book, exercise or write. I was hoping that during quarantine I'd have free time to work on my commissions, but instead, I'm trying my hardest to get away from everyone and it's impossible. It doesn't matter whether or not I tell them to stop, they won't stop. I just want to be left alone so I can actually focus and do something productive. But I'm too weak and pathetic to do so...
Don't use that as an excuse, you can Express yourself on that paper, you can make deep art with those kind of feelings, don't care what others think, lock yourself in your room and create!! Pour yourself onto that page!!!
your not weak or pathetic, if anything your weak for letting those bring you down like that, grab ur nuts an smash out these drawings, remember every good artist has 10,000 bad drawings in them so look at every drawing you do as one less checked off, i believe in you man, you’re already on the right path if your watching this video
I had some toxic people as well they did the same things but now I don't see them anymore because I moved. I suggest for you to put some earphones on with good music u enjoy to drown them out
How can you love a man this much ? MY GOD! I just discovered you like a week ago and I've already seen like 10 videos or more of yours, I'm eternally greatful of how you have change my way of think about artis, about art, and about being an artist, I say all of these from the deepest part of my heart
Everytime I feel down, coming here always makes me feel better almost like a good therpy section and this is the only channel where I watch the whole video not because I'm forced to but because it makes me feel like giving a little thank you for this optimistic video.
I listened to this video three or four months ago when I felt completely useless, incapable of doing good art, terrified that I'll never get a job. Creatively and motivationally I was at my rock bottom. I really thought I had chosen the wrong path when I drop out of university and started taking online courses of concept art and illustration. Your channel and especially this video really helped me get through that time, thank you, so much. I'm listening to it today again, and I'm in tears. You mentioned finishing that one painting that was supposed to change everything and break the cycle of procrastination. I realized I had it two weeks ago when I finally painted something really good. Since then I have finished two more artworks that are also on the same level. I feel so free, happy, and full of hope, as everything is going better now. Also, I started saving up money for your mentorship! Can't wait to sign up for it
I use to really love art when I was back in middle school and I got into the flow of enjoying producing stuff. Then someone one day at school ripped a picture out of my hands I was working and drew on my picture in pen and ruined it. It really made me not want to draw anymore and for the past 12-13 year I haven't really drawn and lost a lot of the skills I was developing. I think this is part due to fearing that my art can be ruined by forces outside of my control and not due to my on skill. Fortunately I have started to try to get back into drawing along with playing piano. It's a very slow process for both but I hope I too will replace my love of video games with a love of art. Your video has been really powerful for me and I am probably going to play it everytime I start doubting the journey I am undertaking to create art I am happy with. Thank you for posting this video.
I'm so glad I found this channel. This video put a tear in my eye. As an struggling artist and smoker who's just on the verge of relapsing, this really made me think and turn my eye inwards, something that I'm usually afraid to do. Thank you so much
Takes a long time but i keep experimenting and trying to find what i love to draw. Also look a little less what others can do instead of dreaming of what i cant do and what isnt my art.
In the academy these 'feelings' are called 'resistances' but the questions that we ask ourselves on why it is hard to get that book or article written are exactly the same. I love drawing when I have to write, I love writing when I have to draw. Many of these feelings, these resistances, have to do with fear of failure, of rejection; anxiety over where to start or how to do things right. Thank you so much for this video, you really are touching on something at affects creative peoples of all sorts!
I'm an indie game developer and a smoker, so this video was pretty damn relatable. It was really nice to hear the perspective of someone who's overcome their hurdles, especially as someone who's spent years unable to do so. Thank you for sharing your perspective on this.
As someone who's been drawing for 15 years, I have to say I can relate to what you have to say. It took me a very long time to realise why I wanted to draw in the first place and stop comparing myself to the amazing artists out there. I first had to acknowledge that I love playing video games more than making my art. After that things just got easier. Before that, every day I didn't draw I truly made myself believe I was a lazy piece of crap who didn't put in the time or effort in to my craft. I can safely say those days are behind me. Keep staying healthy Adam
I want to first thank you for sharing such a personal side of your story, not many tell it how it is. I had wished I seen this when I was in art school. I had similar issues where I felt like I was lazy, blind, idiotic, and unable to focus. I had over a decade of this issue and I never understood why. You pointed out something that I was missing, this all comes to doubt and uncertainty. I've doubted myself, question everything, unable to go with the "flow". I used video games to distract myself...for over 1000 hours... I didn't tackle my fears and it cost me quite a bit, but now I try to slowly get into good habits, make a challenge for myself, and try to ignore my doubts. If there is one thing I want to add is this, I have read and watched a lot of tutorials of multiple programs and things, but I didn't master a single thing nor practice. If you want to be an artist, you need both education and practice, you cannot do one without the other. This video made me discover your channel today and now I can follow another artist I can appreciate.
Well that was unexpected. I have no thyroid, I take daily meds for it and feel like I've been awake 20 hours all the time. I procrastinate constantly even tho I sit in the perfect modest home studio. Love your videos man. Thanks
I LOVE that quote, and that would summarize years of my life chasing after careers, re-educating myself over and over until eventually I said "screw this" and focused on what I was passionate about.
@@yeid44 That's what I've been struggling with the most in the past year. Working in an animation studio, doing many different types of projects, feeling like I don't have a unique voice of my own. Practicing drawing, animating, illustrating, 3D and other at the same time. Maybe @Adam had some advice or could even make a video about it :?
@@AdamDuffArt Haha, that last part is the perfect way to describe where I'm at (or about to get to) in my life right now. I studied science for 6 solid years, but have always had artistic and literary talent. For some reason, there has always been a voice in my head, saying, "Yes, yes, creative expression is nice and all, but when it comes to a job, you need to be serious - also, honestly, you lack the talent to make it in anything creative, so don't bother" (like many people's, my inner critic is an asshole :P). And now here I am, 3 years into working at a genetics testing lab, having largely stopped trying with anything creative, and the light is slowly starting to dawn...I HATE THIS. I don't hate science, I love science..but I hate working in science. I love learning and increasing my understanding of the world around me..but I don't want to be at the forefront of research either. As a teen, I mistook interest for passion, and now here I am in my 30's, battling with chronic anxiety and struggling to motivate myself to make a sandwich for dinner. It's bad. My only saving grace has been that, all the while, another voice has been starting to speak up, and getting louder: "Why are you still doing all of this? You don't have to stay in science if you don't want to, you know; all you have to do is admit it, and then we can make a plan" - it's enough to make me weep (which your last video did - excessively). I don't really have a plan yet, but I know that every day that goes by, my resolve to make a change deepens. So, to your statement I shall say, "Sooooooon"... P.S. Sorry for the long post
The amount of empathy you have for people you've never met is truly truly something I haven't seen anywhere else on UA-cam. Maybe your experiences have moulded you in such a way but I am thankful to have discovered your channel nonetheless. Cheers.
I love hearing your thoughts on this man, really enlightening. One thing I'm thinking. It's not just that I don't know that I have to overcome this obstacle of learning to draw on a technical level, it's how much work it is to finally get there is really intimidating. Especially when people who are much better than you look at their own art and go "eh it's not all that". I know other people shouldn't matter but really difficult to escape from.
Hey Adam, thank you so much for this. I used to be a big gamer, had a lot of fun online. After I burned out from my studies, I spend as many hours that I was physically capable of on playing video games. I had no idea on what to do with my time. The nice thing was: my parents didnt blame me. They saw that I was using games as a way to think. When I was applying for jobs, I would hurdle myself on my letters and after an hour or so, I'd stop, play a bit and suddenly an idea struck me. I'd pencil it down, rinse and repeat. Then I got my first real job. 40 hour work week, away from home, you name it. And suddenly it struck me. The urge to paint. It was a primal need. During my life I have done this off and on but somewhere within me, this light was lit. I need to draw. My technique lacked and I hated everything that even in the slighted had to resemble something. So I would either remain and hate myself to the end of days, stopped painting or take a different approach. So I started painting gnomes. Because nobody could tell me what a gnome was supposed to be. It became this shield I could hide behind, this wall where I could make what I wanted to make without self loathing. My bestie tried to encourage me to move beyond this, but to little avail at the time. Meanwhile I slowly improved my artwork. Applied more technique, started to look around me for inspiration. Started with some plants and then dropped it again. I started to use them as doodles to remember my notes. And then dropped it again. Tried things like perspective which really forced me to come to terms with the self loathing that I felt. Which worked, for a while. And you guessed it, I dropped it again. There was this one event that changed everything. My coworker, whoms project I joined and is a shy governmental employee from the department of permits asked me this one question. Do you think you can translate the result of our project in terms of gnomes? I said yes. And I never told her the amount of panic attacks that I had. I only got angry at her once when she wasnt clear in her instructions in what she wanted to see. Once that fear, that primordial fear taken care of, I got to work. I translated a complex (and flat out boring) policy matter that everyone has been dreading on a spiritual level, in terms of poofy, adorable poof balls. And when I presented this to her co-workers, it did the one thing that art is supposed to do. It caused emotional resonance. And people started to relate to the work and explain themselves by using the work. Those 2 were the first pieces that I signed and they will be exposed somewhere in that governmental building. My contribution to a better and more effective communication. Were these 2 works horrible in terms of technique? Yes. Yes they were. However... they served a goal and struck something within people. They also serve as a motivation to grow as an artist. Because I want to make my images more effective, get the meaning across easier, make something that people can latch on to. So I started to draw more. Drew flowers. Stuff on my desk. Stuff outside. Actively work with lighting. Actively work with color and perspective. I am getting -better- at my fundamentals. One step at the time.
These past couple of years of my life I have been battling with my internal turmoil. My life has been a constant struggle in giving my energy to make other people happy, but in turn I neglected myself to the point that any positive motives I had for my benefit I saw as something selfish. I developed a phobia at the thought of picking up a pencil because all I could think of was my inadequacy and my impending failure. I would just end up hyperventilating at my computer, not a single line drawn. After going to therapy for a little over a year now, I have been on the path to regaining my life and understanding what it means to be happy and proud of my achievements. I have yet to finish a piece at the moment since the day that I started letting my fear control me, but I have been trying to stick to my path to create anything at all. I fall astray a lot, but I try to get back on that horse. It's very tough, but I hope to do good for myself in the future and really create something that I can be proud of.
I really appreciate your effort to give us answers to some questions. All i want is for someone to stop telling me what not to do, to stop saying that something is wrong because then all i have is even more question, and maybe even worse - no questions left to ask. I "can't build bricks without clay" rings very true here, and i appreciate the effort, courage, and humility in giving us something to work with as we go forward.
This is precisely what I needed this lazy Monday morning while I'm sitting here procrastinating on... everything. I'm going to imagine myself feeling good after getting tasks done and get off my butt because of this video. If you ever doubt that your videos make an actual impact on people, don't. THANKS.
Amazing timing. My fear of failure is massive. I'm still in high school and I don't want to go to college or work a monotonous job for the rest of my life. I just want to work on my craft, get big young, and live life by my own rules. But the fear of failure is almost as big as my love for music. This contradiction is eating away at me, making me feel like shit and I am feeling the depression coming back. I try my hardest but it's so hard.
I've been dealing with this most of my adult life. Over the years i've become very self aware of my feelings and curious, and so I've done my fair share of research. This subject is both simple and highly complex. It's simple because it all comes down to making one decision to sit down and get to work. But making that decision is dependant on so many factors that can act as hurdles: - I just ate and i'm feeling sleepy. - I had this thing I planned to do today and didn't and it's bumming me out. - I just watched porn and feeling too emotionally numb to do anything. - It seems like too much work i'd rather play games - Is it even worth it? - I can always do it later - I'm too deep in shit and there's no point in trying - Wait for the motivation, it'll show up eventually - There are people around (Family/Friends) I feel weird working near them - Oh hey! a new UA-cam video/ Facebook notification / Instagram post. - I haven't eaten in a while....shit i'm sleepy again. And sometimes It's just this weird feeling of resistence whenever you're thinking about starting. To tackle this issue, you have to take a step back outside of the box and take a look at it. That box is our brain. It's actually all neuropsychology-related, it has everything to do with dopamine- delivery circuits that you've built in your brain that are related to strong habits/addictions. A gamer has a circuit that craves video games, and when you're trying to "short" the circuit by resisting the crave or thinking about doing something productive, the brain basically sends you bad feelings. And what happens when you're feeling bad? you'll find the fastest and easiest way to feel good again, and you already know where this leads. It's the same exact thing with every other type of addiction - Gambling/Porn/Smoking/Drugs/Braindead entertainment (Random UA-cam videos and social media). And so what this means is that this part of your brain has you on a leash. - Trying to run? it tightens up the leash pulling you back and tricking you into thinking "It's not what you want". - Following the brain? (The crave), good boy, here, have some good feelings. You can't run away from your brain or fight it. You need to make it your ally. So the brain is trying to lead you on a trip a certain way (To "video game land" for example). Like Adam said, you have to find a replacement for that interest. Whether it's music/art/web development/a business idea/sports career/fitness, it has to be something that interests you. Adam brilliantly said - You have to attach a feeling to it, and yes, sitting down and trying to figure out how that interest is making you feel is a crucial part in the proccess of altering your brain's direction. When your brain feels that this new interest is the "New Hype", it will loosen up that old dopamine circuit and create a new path towards your newly found interest. And as you persue it, that new circuit will strengthen and the old one will perish. One of the most important things in your new path is to enjoy it and celebrate accomplishments. Whether you: - Learn something new - Discover newly found energy to persue different things - Feeling healthier than before (Both physically and mentally) - Seeing positive effects of it on your social life Take a few seconds to stop and observe the positive feeling, let it sink in. The reasons for that are: - Like Adam said - it will create distance from your old ways and strengthen the new circuit in your brain. - When you're on the verge of relapsing to your old ways, you'll have that feeling as an anchor to remind your brain - "Nah, this trip looks more fun, let's go there".
Hey, that was a really interesting read. Just seems to validate what I already have been self aware for over a year and that I have a video game addiction. There's quite a good reason I have a hard time playing even more traditional RPG's with a good story to chew on and instead favor short burst multiplayer games or MMO's that constantly have prizes showering on me with that dopamine. Can addiction ever be returned into moderation? I've definitely had previous bouts of addictions and then moments where I was very disciplined and in control of my gaming time as well as my work time for hobbies (albeit disorganized so weak progress, but the routine was established). If I manage to break the leash on games as it currently stands, is it possible to have it return to something in moderation and controlled, or is it kind of like "too late been there done that" and I have to cut it out completely? I know it sounds 100% like I already am making excuses to avoid cutting an addiction (like an addict would) but one has to be realistic as well. My friends, my life, my alternate hobbies and my personality are defined by video games. It's not that I think it's impossible to fully detach myself from video games and flush everyone around me (including friends) but rather that it's unreasonable because everything around me stands on the pillars of that gaming culture and foundation I suppose the obvious answer is "it depends, can you respect those new boundaries or are you susceptible to relapse" but I feel like asking anyways since you did the research on the topic. Your comment and this video seems to heavily imply that I would be permanently replacing one addiction with another in a sense, just one that I would have deemed more productive.
@@tranceaddict11 You'd have to replace it completely. It's like Drugs/Gambling/Smoking - You can't go back to it moderatly, you'll relapse for sure. I feel like abit of an imposter saying these things tho, since I'm still addicted. I haven't decided on my priorities in life yet. I know exactly what I need to do in order to be successful, but gaming is hard wired in me and is standing in the way. Shit's rough.
@@AndreyUrman Yeah I mean I quit smoking easy there's little to lose in the grand scheme, but games? My friends only game, my decoration is game related, my inspiration for piano songs is game related, my inspiration for drawing is game related...music I listen to, etc, etc ,etc. It's not just flushing an addiction it's flushing my identity and whole life lol. It's some tricky shit
@@tranceaddict11 There's the other option of perssuing a game-related career, like game development, game design, music composition for a gaming company, esports commentator etc.
Bruh. This is so true. I’ve seen so many videos telling me “who cares if at first your art is trash, no one is gonna know about it,. Practicing will make you grow even if it is trash.” and I agreed but my body for some reason still rejected the act of writing(an art I want to get better at, even still). I noticed I felt fear and anxiety, although I knew I shouldn’t really care for writing garbage. I draw and I produce music. I enjoy doing those things and I noticed I felt pretty good doing these things but for some reason, the song writing part was always rejected by my body even though I forced through some writing because consciously, I still wanted to do it. But something in my subconscious didn’t allow me to. Not until I stopped all the negative thinking and instead gave myself a mantra and a meditative breathing technique to repeat once I began to feel like my body wants to reject this activity. Not sure if it was because in the past, in high school or something I really hated it, but since I graduated, I wanted to become better at this. “You got this” I repeated this so many times over and over in my head that I began to believe it, and so whenever I felt like negative thoughts/ fear of failure started to come, I turned to use my mantra to quiet those subconscious thoughts, and it works. It changed how I felt about trying something new and wanting to become better at it. but you can’t just do it one day and forget about it. You gotta be persistent. This video helped me realize what that feeling was. Thanks! Hope other people out there find the same enlightenment I did.
This helped, specifically how creating that space with videogames adjusts my mindset. I got into mhw iceborne recently and it was quickly getting to that point where i would make excuses "i'll do the art tomorrow" at which point it was just an excuse which repeated every day until it reached a point where sitting down to do the art was a chore and i couldnt understand how i felt. i spent a few days just focusing on an art piece, after a few days i decided "oh i'll go play monster hunter for 2 hours" but when i got into the game i looked around and it had almost traded places with how i felt about the art when i was just playing this game every day, the game had become the chore. Exceptional video, really resonated with my own issues lately.
I’m not the one to write comments on anything, let alone UA-cam. I gotta say something here... Out of all the videos I have ever watched on overcoming limits and finding purpose, you sir have touched my heart and mind in a miraculous way. I found your video while I was smoking and while I’m not ready to quit just yet, I now know I have the power to. I have the power to overcome all of my creative struggles as an artist as well. Alas, also as a gamer. I respect you, I value your videos and I thank you, as honest and sincere as I could be. Thank you.
I literally stared at ablank page for hours today and i didn't know why. why i couldn't at least try to make something even a simple doodle. Thank you now i know what was holding me back. Now i can fight it. Now i can finally start doing something I'm passionate in
i wont lie, this video nearly made me cry. ive always felt so lazy and stupid for never being able to commit to anything, including drawing, and instead finding respite in videogames. fully realizing that as long as a only want to draw when i feel guilty about it is terrible for my mindset has really helped me looking at drawing from a different perspective.
I wish I was procrastinating making art right now. I have four AP essays I need to do for English and US History and instead I’m working on my comic. Life is stressful
Years ago I drew like crazy. I posted, and posted artwork because I never really cared for criticism or anything. Nowadays I'm doing nothing. My motivation for art slowly faded away as I stopped drawing and saw everyone else's work, I was either really jealous or pitied myself for not having the same skills as said artists. And now I'm on one heck of a challenge to bring my creativity back, but most of the things I want to do are too complex, and I find myself midway of the sketch, already lost the fun and drive, and I just set it aside as another chicken scratch vomit of a sketch and stop for a while. I honestly don't know where to go from here, but I thank you so much for this, you don't know how much I needed this.
actually, I am struggling for a while where its the feelings that make me unable to lift the pen. I feel emotional, borderline physical pain whenever I want to draw. if I recall it started from frustration. For me drawing is hard and taxing mentally. The only moments where I feel free to draw when Im in a what I call a drawing high/rush of madness where I feel the NEED to draw what I feel.
i was riding the wave of success for few months but very recently I started to get back into the being lazy relm, watching this video now is a pure bless for me. still I don't know what to do next or what to break next but at least I now know what not to do. i quit smoking few months back, definitely your words reached to my heart.
Can I just say, you're an incredibly strong person for quitting cigarettes. My mother has been smoking since she was 13 (she's 60 now) and it's taken a toll on her health, the health of her children (my sister and I both have asthma, probably from inhaling too much smoke) and the health of her grandchild. She's a very strong woman, and the fact she could never rid herself of this is a testament on how hard quitting cigarettes can be. That you could do it is very impressive.
I've got so many artist friends going through these feelings, and blaming themselves for all these hardships. I've found myself to be lucky as I'm always trying new things and learning to enjoy stuff. trying to make new merch, new fancy artstyles ect.. listening to this calms me as I'm arting and I'm hoping it can help some of my friends who probably don't know that they feel exactly as you say in the videos.
It makes me feel suffocated because I have so many things to do through out the day and during it I keep getting distracted by my own thoughts, and I end up loosing more time because I'm not really interested in studying right now, although the stuff that I'm learning it's really interesting. My chest keeps thightening and thightening and I don't what to do about it. I took too many days to relax and let all the stress but it doesn't help, I'm always back to square one the day I have to start studying again.
Working very, very hard to make my dream of being a working author a reality, and I draw continuous and high quality narrative inspiration from video games. BUT... whatever I gain from them, they are a constant obstacle to me getting my writing done. One of the biggest pulls I feel to playing a game is that I get to experiece inspiration fully realized, skipping the painful process of building it from scratch. Finding this video was serendipitous. Thank you.
A fine point indeed. I don't think most people can relate to until the deed has been done. To be honest most won't be able to reach that level of dedication... I feel now more than ever to be true. To invest in something so grand, be it skill and learning requires an effort beyond normal. I'm self taught though, can't speak for those doing school, but from what I've seen in so many years, most people choose to be artists cause they are lazy in the first place. I'm not trying to discourage people who feel down and are trying to pick up themselves to be more constructive, but reality does hit like a truck... However, its true you can get there. I was very eager in my younger years but didn't have the "drive" to get through and reach higher levels. Still though, battling my own thoughts everyday even after 15 years of doing this. Only in the last 7 years I was able to get in the right frame of mind and work really hard. I've completed the 365 day challenge, to iterate how it was, after the 2 first months, it was hell... But by the end what it gave me was a will to never give up and keep working and learning.
"You have to get to a certain point before being able to express yourself". It's so true. I guess I know that the point of 'fun' is so far away right now, that levelling up is more appealing. I'm interested to try a 'distraction detox' . Luv you Adam
You know what "kills" me? My own imagination. In my mind I have the idea of an amazing drawing I'd love to do, but when I start "drawing" I know I won't be able to do it, because how I draw in my mind is so different when I try to draw with my hands: I can't get the pose correctly because I don't know how to draw it or the point of view looks weird or the proportions are wrong, or the eyes are not equal or the hands look like mutants... And that makes me quit and play video games. Because I ask so much of myself, because I'm way too perfeccionist with what I do that's what's wrong with me: I want to be perfect at the first try. I find myself looking back at old drawings when I had a graphic tablet and I remember when I was first drawing them I thought they were okay but now I want to delete them, even tho I won't do it because they have a special place in my heart as they are the first drawings I made with the graphic tablet. And now whenever I try to draw with pencil everything looks bad, I can't draw a single face without thinking it looks really bad. All these problems combined with my self-hatred product of my inexistant self-esteem make stop procrastinating so difficult I can't even think about taking a pencil to draw because the first thought that appears into my mind is: it will look terrible. I've even tried to start modeling with Blender but it's so damn difficult I quit it 15 mins after starting. Anyway sorry for the rant but this video made me think about it and seeing everyone's comments with their own problems made me want to post mine. By the way, English is not my first language so I'm sorry if I made mistakes while writing this.
The same thing used to happen with me, I hated my own drawings because they never turned out how they did in my head, but whenever I was just drawing for the fun of it, not letting my thoughts directly guide me, I ended up with something that I could appreciate. Even more so, my own work inspired me. And it was the work that I wasn't even really trying on. I like to think of expectations of your own skills as expectations of a person. Nobody is perfect, you can't expect someone to act exactly as you want them to. You can't expect an art piece to look exactly as you want it to. The best thing you can do is just put effort into it without setting extreme expectations.
I think the problem is that it's impossible to get it to look just how you see it in your head. Whenever I draw it always ends up completely different from how I imagined it, especially when you get into the details (that's why I like sketching more than anything else lol, it represents my original idea the most because of its vagueness). You need to set a bar for yourself of 'this is close enough'. Slowly, as you work on more pieces to the end, you will begin to forget about the original thought you had in your head and focus on how your drawing actually looks. Our heads can create beautiful images but we are in reality, and must work with what we have.
I... yeah this was exactly what I needed... thank you. This was exactly what I needed to hear. I don't really have anything special to mention or talk about. I'm an artist who struggles with procrastination and this was just exactly what I needed. Thanks.
17:50 "producing artwork when you feel guilty" This one line totally resinated with me so much lately. I feel so guilty whenever I'm not working that even the thought of taking time off makes me feel anxious. Because of this I work 7 days a week either on client work or personal projects. I do get bursts of motivation but they come rarely, maybe every other month. I want to get that motivation more frequently but I haven't figured out how yet. So I'm just drawing because I feel like thats what I should be spending the majority of my time on. If you want to be good at art and be successful you have to work really hard and put in the time. Or at least thats what I tell myself.
Your abosulty fantastic. Thank you for your comment. I am certain that you have helped more than just me , not feel so alone in this. I know they must me a hand full of other real people who read this and understood what you felt. Thank you. Please know you have something so valuable within you. ~froshua
hey! I relate so much to this. I'm not a professional artist though, my major is a bit distant from an art field, illustration and stuff...so when I don't draw cuz of uni homework I feel quilty, and when I actually draw I feel quilty too. Because it's not enough and I'm not enough. I've finished one illustration a couple of days ago and I can't do anything right now, scrolling through pictures my favourite artists post online and feel kinda pathetic. I hope we'll get through this somehow hah
@@hiendarinenkoray I totally get the same feeling when scrolling through other artists! I love to see their artwork but it always triggers my anxiety. I hope one day I wont feel so guilty or self-deprecating when I look at other artists work. Instead to be proud of my work rather than constantly compare it or tell myself I'm not doing enough. Good luck on your art journey, I'm sure your doing the best you can with time you have free.
I've said it before and I'll say it again - your art channel is arguably the best thing that's happened to me in my artistic life. I'm literally going through this same issue - buried under so much work that I've let pile up, for reasons I didn't understand, and it's just ended up in a cycle of me feeling guilty for not working, and procrastinating with games, which leads to even more guilt. this video is an amazing first step for me - thank you so much!
I am a 21 years old man and im sobbing at 1 am right now. For years now I felt like there was no reason for me to exist. I was just going through notions, routines and distractions just to forget and feel a bit better in the current passing moment. I had no plans made for my life because, frankly, I wasn't anticipating to be alive at this point. This video really hits me right in the spot. I'm scared of being inadequate . And looking at a finished artwork, or any professional performing their craft filled with that rotten sense of inadequacy. Im staring at my arm right now; its completely shredded in self-inflicted blade wounds. I wish to never fall that low again, to be so empty that only the stinging bite of razor can make me feel something. I want to feel needed and perhaps art will allow me to do so. Thank you for this video, it might turn out to be quite literally life changing. Everyone reading this comment, I hope you find your place in life. Its a task I've given to myself. Take better care of yourselves than I did of me.
As an emerging developer of videogames, I no longer enjoy playing videogames. I love the art and the craft and the programming, it fuels my soul.. but most games don't give me gameplay that feels meaningful. I'd always rather do something else, further my learning, talk with my girlfriend, something.. I still haven't found the answer to whether this is good or bad. I guess we'll see.
YourZombieMop I’m saying you are burnt out on playing them. Take off a month or two. Don’t break the break. I get like that sometimes with books and video games where I don’t enjoy them after awhile and need to take time off.
@@Pitman856 Awe man, thanks :)) the thing is, I haven't been playing them in the past months at all. I'll pick something up about once a month and find myself unfulfilled.
What a great advice! Thanks so much for being so honest, humble and truthful. I play games and watch a lot of UA-cam videos to learn from other artists and find out what I’m missing. During the quarantine, I’m taking myself time to study other areas of art. I started a painting and it is waiting for me to finish. Too much going on, but I know I can do it. No excuses, things come up and there I am stopping what I was doing and there I am in square one and starting over. Thanks for all the encouragement and positive feedback. Blessings and take care.
This haunts me on how much it relates to me ,the shame of knowing i want to be an artist but i don't put in how much time i should be putting in, i will be better. Thank you
I have a great UA-camr for you - Vaatividya. I also like LEMMINO but not everyone likes his voice in my family. I personally can listen to him for hours. Oh and of course, David Attenborough - he's the grandfather I never had :)
Happened upon this and the timing couldn't have been better as I've been particularly struggling with these existential questions and feelings recently. To be honest, I've always struggled with similar dilemmas (haven't we all?), but I don't want to overthink it at this point. I just know that this is what I really needed to hear right now. You definitely opened my eyes to the role of utilizing the fundamentals, the process itself, in pushing through fear, doubt, self-sabotage, etc.... pick your personal poison. Thanks, Adam. I don't know you, but it's evident that we have a lot in common. Be well.
I saw this video randomly in my feed and, being a chronic procrastinator, I clicked it and I'm so glad that I did. Your comments about the fear of that unknown, that lack of motivation to really push yourself to find that self-reward, really resonated with me. I'm a musician and I've found myself doing even the most menial of household tasks when other time-wasters get boring to avoid practicing my instruments or studying up on theory. I've kept calling myself lazy, unmotivated, undeserving of success, whatever it is to attempt to shame myself into putting in more effort but nothing works. I've realized that it really is that fear of getting into the thick of it, immersing myself into wide world of music theory and experimentation, spending weeks practicing just to get one piece down. I keep telling myself "what on earth have you gotten yourself into? how could you possibly become even slightly skilled or knowledgeable in any one of these subjects? how on earth do you think you can do this? how could you play this piece that you fumble with at even the slightest attempt? don't kid yourself." i keep comparing myself to better musicians, even one of my closest friends who is so naturally motivated he could sit at a drum kit or a piano for five hours at a time. I keep expecting to sit down one day and say "this is the day that I'll be like them." and raising myself to that bar has only made me more fearful of that sea of work and practice. it probably doesn't help that people will ask me how a project is going, how I've been coming along, and I lie and tell them that it's been great and feel even worse because of it. I've even had periods like "riding that wave" like you mentioned. there have been times where I find a transcription of a song that I love and I sit at a piano, because I really want to play it or transcribe it, and even though it's damn near impossible to play at first, I'll have it down in a week. but I don't ride the wave and keep the groove, so to speak - I "reward" myself by slacking off afterwards, forget all about the high that I had from it, and go back to square one. This has given me some great food for thought and self-reflection. Thank you for making this video and I hope you're doing well.
What if the art that im producing is mostly technical practice, like perspective and figure drawing. Do i reward myself by doing more technical practice or reward myself by making my own thing? Thanks for the great video as always!
@Mage Animator thank you for your advice, im actually doing something similar to that right now! Problem is i think im practicing too much as supposed to drawing for funs sake.
I've been struggling with procrastination for most of my life. (I'm 28 now). I've done therapy, counseling and basically felt like a failure, but this video has probably been the greatest help and encouragement I've had so far. So thank you for making this
why I cant get fully into the art groove is because I feel like even if I was some god artist that could draw perfect drawings I still would be never noticed, never getting comments, commissions, attention, despite me putting all art on social media cus social media is luck based after all.. Might as well play games where I get more attention from my teammates in game or can relate to friends lol more than my art
this made me sad because it made me realize i often felt obligated to playing games, because they gave me a sense of fulfillment that immediate work and career simply did not. I found myself feeling like I NEEDED to play games, and it makes me sad to realize its a hobby that just doesnt coincide with the work I want to complete. Maybe someday i can go back and enjoy them, many were genuinely inspiring to my work but I just can't keep living a double life. If i want to find success with what I am working towards, I have to let it go, this part of me that was so important. I didn't expect to feel this message so deeply but its something I didn't even consider an option. I don't do that much art although I want to get more into it, but your advice has resonated with me for my other passions just as deeply. Thank you Adam, for making me realize what I never even knew i could realizea
One thing I feel obligated to point out is that many people experiencing these things are actually suffering from executive disfunction. Yes, they have associated the act of drawing to a feeling of anxiety, but to people with executive disfuncion EVERY action is anxiety inducing because life feels like and endless list of chores. After a while you become unable to do simple things like brushing your teeth or showering because all the things you normally have to do anyway (such as eat and get out of bed) are enought to completely exaust you. Drawing is a big thing and it consumes a lot of time, so it starts to feel like an impossible tasts because it wears you out so much. Honestly in these cases I really don't feel like going cold turkey with video games and just drawing instead would help. Anything that is a continuous actions you perform every day will just wears you out a lot just by thinking about, and because of that it becomes even harder to perform the action itself. I cut out video games multiple times and it only made it worse, because I had all this anxiety and nothing to funnel it. I would just lay in bed feeling incredibly anxious about all the things I should be doing but couldn't. I feel like telling people that giving up video games is the only way to stop procrastinating is enough to make many people give up being an artist altogether, because video games are such a big part of many peoples lives. So two things: look for a psychologist. I'm serious. Being able to talk to someone about this difficulty after suffering in silence for so long in incredibly helpful. They can help you get your toughts in order and find a solution that fits your case. And no, you don't have to tell them all your most intimate issues. If you only want to sort out your procrastination it's perfectly fine. Second: In my case, the best solution was to completely forbid myself from playing for only a portion of the day, and certain days of the week. Before that, I would play during the day and so by the time I had finally finished all my work at night it was nearly time to go to bed, so I would just tell myself I could draw the day after, but just did it all over again the next day. The incredible thing about this is that you start to appreciate your gaming time way more now that you know it's limited.
Bleach Martini So, how did you get in touch with your emotions? I can't seem to get in touch at all -- it feels like there's a glass pane between me and emotions, which is why I rely on logic...
I rally appreciate this answer, lately i have been feeling down. I just don't have the drive that i used to have to practice and it feels like everything is a terrible chore lately.
very true about the 'chore' thing. i used to get plenty of artworks done and be totally fine with producing them, then after one single assignment where i got stuck on the technical barrier, my teacher started continuously urging me to *do* stuff - "keep working youre not doing enough" sort of thing. ever since then ive been unable to joyfully put pen to paper and create something because i hold it off the same way i avoid chores like you said. it doesnt feel like something i just do, it feels like something i *have to* do and its tiring like a chore
I cried watching this. This video made me realize hard truths about so meny of my own emotions and actions revolving around my own 8 process. I have so much I need to think on. I'm so overwhelmed. Thank You
The part about classic (warcraft) taking effort or being hard back when it was "Vanilla" is quite faulty, but the rest is worth thinking about. It's a heapload harder today and requires a lot more thinking along with skill, plus knowledge. Getting 40 people isn't hard, getting 40 people who knows how to play is, even if its such a small thing as "Follow the mark 100% of the time" - people still fail. Now you need 9 people (The least) to follow about 5-7 different necessary mechanics, and that's a lot harder than 1 - which it used to be. However - back at your topic of this, you can also consider what your hobbies are - if they are Drawing only, and you're just gaming to "pass time", then Gaming isn't a hobby. But if you have gaming AND drawing as a hobby, it becomes a lot harder to put it so simply as getting to the feeling of "meh" about gaming alone. The "meh" feeling can very well just be overcumbrance of self doubt or lack of energy, and that energy does not necessarily refill cause you quit one of your hobbies. You can pursue more than one thing in life, and nobody has to be an expert - Life gets to hardmode if you have a brain full of imposter syndrome, anxiety, depression and especially if you suffer from Anhedonia (look it up if you don't know what this is). There are a lot of people out there suffering from a lot of mental weights, and in todays society we're not taught love - we're taught "Use and move on". Hence why I disagree while also agreeing with you - at the same time (Cept for the WoW part cause that was just not true in and of itself.). Another person in the comment section mentioned "Subconssious weight" or something of the sort, where you've put off things and don't realise it's actually eating at your energy. I am fully aware that I would feel better if I stopped saying "I'll do it tomorrow", for example, cause that would remove one thing I "have to do" either now or in the future, which would leave me with more energy to pursue whatever I do for a hobby - with a positive feeling. I'm still on the journey of learning through my battles with depression, anhedonia, anxiety and autism - and knowing what I am doing wrong, is not the same as knowing how to fix it.
Also wish to add, I am not trying to disrespect you in any way - just finding some additional critique on your ongoing mention of Warcraft, which is heavily influenced by nostalgia-goggles (Even if some argue it is not, it 100% is -- As I also remember parts of my past life experiences as harder than it actually was, or better than it was, same with taste: We change, grow, get more experience and learn for our entire life.) I'm really glad you post these videos as they always offer some food for thought for me (and clearly MANY others!) - and also sparks me personally to "think harder" about certain aspects of my life, as well as giving me personally confidence to even put up a discussion against some of your words. It's great that youtube exists for these reasons, to spread knowledge and to learn - as well as perhaps re-think steps we thought were right. What this video - and comment section - do for me personally, is make me DO SOMETHING rather than just think dark thoughts about why I am even alive. Listening to people talk, hearing or reading other views, helps. I get a lot less "Do it tomorrow" after these types of videos, since they help me reconsider what I am doing at this moment and what I can -perhaps- do to change it; if even for an hour or two. The small steps help. Like making your bed can be a huge accomplishment for some of us. :) So I wanted to come back, and make sure you do not take it the wrong way - as I know I can be quite "filter-less" in how I say things. Thanks for your videos, and your very beautiful art.
I needed this message today.. I am an artist, started my career in publication, during my senior year of high school. Also happy to quit smoking. It’s day 4, smoke free and I’m so moved by your testimony. Thank you for your transparency. This was a very powerful episode for me.
"Your procrastination has nothing to do with being lazy"
Me: *Save to Watch Later list*
Lol exactly what I did, but still we've ended up here.
hahahaha literally did this while there was ad i was waiting to skip xD
never related to a comment more than this one
This is the one video I didn’t put in watch later, I didn’t want to feel bad about myself any longer
_watch later is full_ *uh oh*
_creates another one_
_watch later 2 is full_ *oh*
playlist limit is 5,000 videos
source: my experience
You are honestly saving my life right now. I finally realize how scared I am.
Omg I feel the same way!!!!!!!
Scared of WHAT though? If it's not some bad medical results or losing your home, no food etc I get it, but other than that, what's to be scared of?
@@daviedood2503 it's not being scared of medical things or things like that it's the fact that you want to be an artist and you procracinate alot and if you continue to do this you'll turn around and you're already ,50 still procrastinating and not pursuing your dream as an artist
@@daviedood2503 I ask myself that everyday, but then I remember that I have a chronic anxiety disorder. Sometimes there's just not a logical reason to be scared, but the feeling is there.
@@demi42899 if it's medical I can understand. It's chemical biology happening. Otherwise it's psychologically freaking yourself out. Ppl can make something bigger and worse than what it really is. This is why @ssholes have a somewhat better peace of mind. They just don't give a f.
I HAD to adopt this skill set. Stress and worry like that actually does something phsycial to your body. It literally can make you sick. Not to mention shorten your life. No art career or "would be would not be" potential is worth my life.
I personally just want to be very good at it to make art for myself, friends and family to enjoy. And any public person who may come across it. I don't care for working for a company. THEY WILL suck the joy out of it all and turn what I love into a chore that will make me hate it.
If I HAPPEN to make something and it goes into a game or poster, hey cool but I don't have expectations of it. I just... Go.. And do.
I don't have expectations for anything or anyone really. That way you'll never stress and be let down. If they don't ever do it or hold up to their word hey cool I didn't expect them to. This way I'm ALWAYS suprised if it comes through bc it was never EXPECTED.
Expecting to be a high paid artist, expecting this and that can and will lead to stress and diapointment.
Just make what YOU love and enjoy and the speed and quality will come. BUT you have to be consistent. Meaning draw each day if u can. Make time to get atleast 1 doodle in if it's not some landscape or portrait etc.
Alot of times you have to give your brain a break. THINGS HAPPEN when you stop for a moment. The brain processes things subconsciously. While you're doodling you'll get this AH HA! moment. I LOOOOVE those. I'd get them all the time when I was younger.
Now that I have more experience in various things, they come alot fewer and long time lengths, but when they DO happen, WOW are they profound.
just replace the word 'artist' with any other profession or task and this still holds up.
Agree, I am not into painting or being an artist, but I am a programmer, and it still fits. Simply love this channel
Well from both of you, a huge thank you :)
@@krzys2sokyami681 well, being raised by a mother who was both a fine artist and computer programmer (with a degree in both), I take this very much to heart. Thank you Krzys :)
@@AdamDuffArt 😯 wow cool, programming is fun though given with an interesting goal.
@@krzys2sokyami681 As a fellow programmer, I view my work as my art. It fuels my soul.
"What does the thought of drawing make me feel right now?"
Usually a multitude of different things: 1 - I'm not good enough for my own ridiculously high standards so I would only disappoint myself. 2 - I lost so much time not drawing (I didn't really start until late high school) that I'll never get good enough so why try. 3 - If I loved it or was meant to do it, I would have the drive and hunger to do it more often, wouldn't I? 4 - If I got good, I'd have to be consistently good to maintain work and I don't know if I can do that because I lack practice. 5 - It feels like all my ideas are derivative and what's the point if I can't make something unique to myself? Its a vicious self-defeating cycle.
I know a lot of this is just my brain fighting against productivity though. If I don't practice, I don't get better, even though the brain prefers the comfort and perceived stability of not doing things.
I think video games provide an easier or at least more structured drip feed of the feelings of accomplishment -- Dark Souls is hard but there's a clear road to victory, whereas with art, you have no idea if something you're making will come out right or just the way you want it, or whether other people will like it. Games are like a well-lit obstacle course in their own self-contained gyms, but sometimes art feels more like getting lost in the woods in the dark and only occasionally finding drinkable water or shelter on the good days.
That's a bit too melodramatic though, isn't it? Maybe the thought of taking it so seriously is what holds me back. I psych myself out of making things because I suck all the fun out of creation by worrying that its good enough or unique enough.
i have the same problem. i wish i could be like the people who just draw random stuff without caring because they find it fun
I have the same problem, I love drawing but sometimes I just can't because I feel like if I draw I'll disappoint myself and I will start hating art, and I don't want that so I stop drawing to keep loving art..
I feel the exact same way, I haven't done anything in almost five years because the enjoyment I got out of trying to make anything wasn't worth the blowback and depression from failing. So I quit.
man I can't tell you how hard that list hit. It feels so futile making the decision to start what seems like an endlessly uphill battle when I a) don't really believe I have what it takes to make it and b) don't know what will be the result of even my best efforts. It's unhealthy and self-defeating. With videogames, there's always the promise that there IS an ending and that with enough persistence you'll get to it, and if you can't, you can always just play another game.
@@GlitzPixie Games offer a sense of accomplishment and a rigid structure that you can practice things in to get better. There's rules for every game world, and even with random generations like roguelikes, the basic framework is there and you can practice mechanics until it becomes familiar and routine despite whatever upgrades you get. Playing against other people adds another layer of randomness, but you're all still playing with the same rules and you can at least guess what they can or would do within those rules.
Art doesn't have those boundaries unless you set them for yourself though, and that can be liberating or paralyzing in its freedom. Wanna draw hyper realistic? Cartoony? Do 3D? Animate? Sculpt? There's fundamentals but the skillsets vary largely. Wanna try something different? You might be starting from square 1. Or at least square 2.5. That's not necessarily a bad thing though, and learning new skills is never a bad thing.
The last thing I want is for my comments to discourage others though. Its just the way it made me feel in the past, but I'm trying to overcome those feelings and my legitimate problems with procrastination, fear, and laziness because I really *do* want to get better and I hope others who want the same can push through as well.
We all want to express ourselves. Finding the voice you want to speak with is difficult but worthwhile. Don't give up, guys. I believe in everyone but myself, lol. =P
This was just perfect timing. A friend made me aware of the imposter syndrome, which is a personality type that expects oneself to be a natural genius and when you can't get something right first time you feel like a fraud and a failure. I constantly run away from drawing cos I just feel crap about myself, that I'm wasting my time cos how could I ever be successful? So I waste my time playing games cos that's success, right? ;)
I recently listened to the episode on Procrastination on the wonderful podcast called Ologies which basically said I needed therapy to stop my type of procrastination (linked to imposter syndrom and anxiety lol). Now procrastinating on getting a therapist, so I guess UA-cam videos and random human advice will have to do XD
It absolutely IS success, and it's meaningful success - it's just limited by the game you play. You achieve this awesome achievement, feel awesome - then you turn the game off and the only thing to do at that point is look for another game, right!
I still love playing games, but I keep myself focused on the paintings on my wall - the permanent imprints of myself I'm leaving behind for others to witness and enjoy. Unfortunately that's the one thing that games can't provide us with (YET!! - and that's a big YET!)
I'd recommend Carol Dweck's books/UA-cam video about the growth mindset. There's a good 45 minute video on youtube you can listen to. I'll post a link if you are interested but can't find it
@@peterjacksonanton4814 thanx very much, would appreciate it :)
@@Fyrebirdi ua-cam.com/video/-71zdXCMU6A/v-deo.html
Impact Theory with Tom Bileau is another great resource. Remember that almost every fulfilled, successful artist will tell you it's possible...but we gotta accept responsibility and put in the work :)
My name is Adam, I didn’t come here for a once over on quitting smoking which I have been desperately trying to do - but when he said his name like someone would say his, I looked up and almost cried. It cut to my core and now I’m standing here next to fish and potatoes, just having put out a cigarette, and I feel like I’m floating between two possible worlds. Thank you Adam, for not just your inspiration to draw again but to be spoken to in a different way that I needed. It was an incredible coincidence, and I’m grateful. Power to you man.
You can do it my dude, it can be incredibly hard but don't give up
I smoke, too. I've been a weed and alcohol addict for awhile but I felt like cigarettes were a good compromise to replace them because they didn't "intoxicate" me. My whole family's full of smokers and I've seen them quit one by one. Not all, but it's inspiring. This video is such a treasure because although it's unfortunate for anyone to become sick, it serves a very intense example. You look young, I know you can pull through and find something to replace it that will make you healthier and happier. Much love!
Yes, you can do it. The moment you decide that you will do it, you have chosen a new path, one towards your own happiness and your own fulfillment. That's the most important step. If you smoke 1, 2, 10, 100, 1000 cigarettes on your way to quitting, it's all ok. You don't have to be the perfect version of yourself now - or ever. As long as you keep steering towards your goal, you will eventually get there. And that's exactly as it should be. Safe Travels, my friend.
Keep it up man I'm trying to quit myself. Started at 18 and I'm 26 now. Smoke like 4-6 cigarettes a day and I'm already not the healthiest person to begin with. Its a fucking weird feeling when you suddenly snap back into like an aware state as you stare at your cigarette and wonder what the fuck have you been doing sucking these things in for years...
Also doesnt help I also smoke weed quite a bit so I just have a terrible amount of smoke going into my system all the time and my brain has probably associated the THC, nicotine and the release of dopamine together in some jumbled mess.
thank you Adam from UA-cam
During this quarantine I realized I’ve been using art so much to procrastinate on school work that I almost can’t do art without having to procrastinate for something else
put your school work first, or maybe a good balance between the two (school and art), and consider doing something art related as a job in the future, because for many of us art was a hobby to begin with. (I used to draw and watch anime instead of school-work) :) good luck!!
Fuck the school, just do art.
@altkovac school made worst years of my life a million times worse and gave back nothing usefull in exchange. Also ruined my interest to art till I got 23. The best thing you can do at school is not to let it hurt you.
I hope that education system is better in the developed countries, but I doubt it.
Art in this instance is your gaming. It really applies to anything really, whether it be sports or work. You really just need the insight to separate what needs to be done from what doesn't. And once you find what needs to be done, engross yourself in it; the feeling of feeling your goal will propel you. Glad i watched this fantastic vid.
OMG that's so true! I draw the most whenever I have to work for school!
I feel happy when i draw, i feel like i can do something and be something, i feel like I’m the best when i draw i feel confident when i draw but at the same time i feel unconfident i feel like I’m nothing and i feel like i will never live up to my standards and achieve my dreams
sometimes i really question your ability to read my mind. these are perfectly timed, every single time!
Procrastination talks are always well-timed
Aren't they??? Really... xD
I think we're just kindred spirits Phanttoni :)
@@AdamDuffArt we're all brought together here in my opinion,
thank you for this video 💝
Crazy how my job is revolving around videogames but this video still helped me open up my eyes more to how I could be a more constant with my craft
I appreciated all of this fr man. Great stuff and you've got some amazing talent
I guess this finds us all eventually.
@Shoyoumomo Love your videos man!
Its really funny, it's 3 in the morning for me right now. I've been having a hard time sleeping because I keep thinking about how I'm not producing enough art. I give myself so much shit for it that it makes sense that I'm not having fun with my art anymore. It's not even that I'm struggling when it comes to starting a drawing, but I get impatient with myself about finishing and posting. I end up getting so emotional that I get fed up and just stop midway.
I'm still trying to figure out how to not drag myself through the dirt when it comes to doing art, but not guilt tripping myself is certainly a start.
Thank you for this video, it helps to hear your words of wisdom on this topic. Hope your safe and heathly!
I couldn't be happier to hear it Ias. And thankfully I decided not to use the usual loud jazzy intro music because that's just rude at 3am :)
It's so funny how strangers can capture someone else's feelings so effortlessly. I've been going through (practically word for word) what you've been going through. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one.
hey that's exactly how i've been feeling for the past...year? two years? I finish stuff sometimes though, but it's so exhausting...
It’s 2:00, and raining outside.
I’m tired in a way sleep can’t fix.
@@gadellomagnollo1810 take a hot bath and eat some sweets, then watch a cute cartoon. helps me
I've got a new condition I'm in. It's called procrastinator's guilt.
J 5in im right there with you man :(
Same
same.
Same. Whenever I get back in productive state this feeling just eats me, like I always think where would've I been rn if had done that from the start
@@dmitryhuskov It's not just me. People around me tease me that I could've been a millionaire if only I did what I can do. I mean I even got plans, sources and opportunities, I just don't take action on them.
This is so incredibly true. I had a period of my life during the school holidays where I drew every single day. I managed to distance myself from video games for about a week and then suddenly, the art started flowing. It was the most productive period of my life. I had an entire sketchbook filled with work ready for my education the next year by the end of those holidays and I was so incredibly proud.
Congratulations man! I hope that sketchbook really helped you
Habits are like water channels we carve in mud. The more times you do something, the deeper the channel is carved, until the water flows without you even having to think about it. Take a hard and intentional look at what channels you have carved and if they're flowing in the direction you want your life to go. Developing a new habit/behavior means coming back every day and carving out this new channel for the water to flow. At first it will be hard, and if you stop too soon you'll lose all your progress, but the more you do it, the easier it gets, until before you know it the water is flowing in this new direction as effortlessly as it did before.
*Clicking on this video, expecting the usual "Just do it!" speach I always get."
Lucid: "Yeah just do it but here's an in-depth rambling explanation of why"
Me: Oh, coolio.
I can totally relate to your reaction - althouuuuuugh... in all attempts not to sound like a tool "just do it" is actually a great way to get over humps - just saying!
Basically make more, consume less. Forcing yourself to start the engine, then going with the flow. Thank you very much for this. Something like this was shared on the channel Improvement Pill.
8:30 It always boggled my mind how I could enjoy super hard games where you would basicly hit your head against the wall for hours with no progress at all, but even just now thinking of doing that with something productive makes me feel terrible. My first association when you said what does drawing make you feel was something like "inadequate" (or a less nice word for that)
I wonder, is it because the path ahead is clear, it's just a matter of execution? You have confidence that with enough tries, you will eventually prevail, because you have done so before, because this is Something You Are Good At? Or perhaps because your performance is private, you can fail as many times as you like with no judgement?
Exactly! It only makes sense that there's an emotional barrier or fear that's holding you back. And inadequacy is a huge common feeling we feel (myself included - daily!!). I have learned to regard this feeling of inadequacy (also known as "impostor syndrome") as an occupational hazard - we're emotional beings and we need to rationalize our own feelings sometimes - observe ourselves from a 3rd person perspective and see our self-doubt objectively - then address it and keep painting :)
Jonathan Caridia Progress is just easier to see in video games. You fight a hard boss and lose. Okay next time I won’t Aggro whelps, or get tail swiped. Tries again. Dies again, but got boss damaged much further. You can easily see theses small victories.
With art, it not only takes so much more time to build the knowledge base, but it also takes a lot of time to even know where to begin. When you finally begin, it is very difficult to see your own progress because your in the middle of it all. This then leads to many negative thoughts and sometimes complete abandonment of Art.
As I believe was mentioned in regards to beginners, once you finally push through and learn the fundamentals, it gets “easier” to know what and how to make progress. I’d imagine at that point it is like crafting recipes.
That's because games have clear paths, and understandable achievable progress.
In games, you can easily learn what itens to equip, what attacks to avoid, what skills to pick, everything you need to reach a GARANTEED success, such as defeating that bitch boss who took you over 100 tries, all so you can move on to the next, VERY CLEARLY STATED chapter of the story.
In real life, it's not like that... it's not all that simple, things are in constant change, thus making it much harder to do anything. Time and literally everything else is against you, and you have to constantly adapt, which may cause you to be overwhelmed.
And even if you achieve what you wanted, you might not know the applications for it, not have the opportunity to use it, or literally have something entirely out of your control, such as a relative's death, fuck you over, making you feel like every moment you passed improving yourself was a waste.
That's why, in my view.
Sometimes to just recognize that you dont have the capacity at the moment to have perspective about the feelings you’re experiencing at the moment. It helps tremendously, it lifts the weight off a bit and let’s you know that whatever that feeling is you can always come back to it later and inspect it with a clearer head. What you’re feeling doesn’t 100% reflect on what’s objectively going on.
This is the best advice I've ever received and it honestly hurts how much I can relate. It's so easy to hate myself for filling my life with video games when I'm not doing coding or art, but everything feels so uncertain when I'm trying to tackle anything creative, and that scares me.
I've been called a lazy ass and embedded it into my head twenty times more for each time I heard it. I'd make myself sick for not doing what I needed to do and fucking sitting it, hating myself more and more I kept doing what I was doing but the deeper I got into that mindset, the higher the hurdle went. The harder life got, and the more that the word 'lazy' got hammered into my brain. I've gotten much better over the past year but I still hate myself a lot, and I expect nothing more than failure most times I try to achieve things. It feels good to be able to wrap my head around why I acted the way I did, and why I act the way I do... And how that mindset is hurting me.
Thank you.
how r u doing today?
I remember drawing so much around 2015-2016.. I LOVED to make art. I don't know when this changed, it could be when I started to be more critical with my art (e.g. Caring about proportions..) , the sense of guilt for not practicing the basics, of not improving.. It just hurts that actually I barely have the urge do draw, sometimes I can even start , but I give up after a try. In my mind I can't tolerate a ''bad drawing'' anymore. This shit is killing me because I didn't give up drawing!! Thanks for the video.
This goes way beyond drawing, as an engineering student who is struggling with motivation issues, I completely agree with all you've said. Especially the idea that you need to have good technique to express yourself. When all you are dealing with is technicalities on your work it is very difficult to stay motivated.
I graduated last year, keep going! The end is worth it 🙂🙂
Thank you.
Procrastination is a coping mechanism that can lead to unhealthy habit if we continue to follow the old program.
It’s subconscious.
I’ve been procrastinating so this is a perfect time for me to truly listen and get moving.
Taking ACTION one step at a time despite the challenges to break free.
Thank you.
Blessings everyone. 🙏🏼🍀⚡️
I remembered when I could watching anime and youtube for almost a day. Similar to your smoking story, I know that it is bad, I know what I should do, and everyone said that there are something better to do. And fortunately, I watched Mel Robbins and she said that procrastination is a stress reliever. She recommends to just start even if then you only work for 5 minutes or less
I did that! I tried to study just a few minutes per day(It was when I am in the last year of high school) and lot of times it lasted for 10 minutes to 1 hour. I started to learn math, because I like it but even though I like it I didn't study it. After days of consistent study, I got this reaction "Wth? It's just like that? This is simple". I felt that I'm doing it right! after boring session of study I finally understands it! that made me happy
Then I learned that if I keep pushing myself trough this boring feel I will get what I wanted! Now I'm in college and we're studying Java. It is absolutely boring to study from hundreds of pages of books. But I know, if I keep studying then eventually I will understand. So, I stick to study those books. And after a couple of months, I understand java's basic, I finished Git course, I finished VIM book, and now I'm studying Data Structure and Algorithm in Java
It's all because I know if I keep learning/doing, I will get that carrot
edit: I still like to watch anime and yt or gaming, but now it is like I have control over when I have to do that or doing my daily target
I'm not like a visual artist, but your videos have recently been helping me put effort into completing the novel I'm trying to write. This video especially. I've been in that loop of constantly doing some work that I'd consider enough, be it a page or a chapter, then rewarding myself with games and shit that doesn't matter and I just didn't understand why It still took me so long to get going the next day. I get it now, I might be making a bit of progress each day, but I need to reach that state where the words just flow nonstop. I'm gonna distance myself from games and from my friends who spend all their time playing games for a little bit. Thanks.
Well I'm not sure if by "you're not an artist - but a writer", unless writing isn't your main profession - I'd call writing an art! But maybe you're writing something on the side of your main career.
Either way though Foxy, a huge thank you :)
Foxy McLavish I'm in the same boat. Art takes time. Just write everyday, research your world, but most importantly, Write.
@Bones Sama Thank you for sharing man. Yeah It's really tough to start out without a system, I can almost count myself lucky that the virus is I guess, removing the obstacles in my way of working this out. I eventually want to be a career novelist so I'm getting a sort of trial run while my job has been closed. I haven't gotten to where I want to be though. But I get that it takes time and effort to get there. This really helps inspire though, so again, thanks!
This video is so relevant to me. I quit cigarettes a month ago and I will not go back. Smoked for 10 years and it was an emotional crutch. I’m finding my way back to my centered self with art.
As a musician that's in a terrible creative and psychological state this really calmed my mind and gave me the energy to just push trough to the reward threshold. Much love and respect man, I appreciate you so much.
As an aspiring artist who just cant seem to pick up my ipad due to a mix of these feelings, and ADHD, this video is exactly what i needed to hear right now, I always find these kinds of advice videos so helpful, thank you Adam.
He is talking about Painting and im trying to find a job so im not a burden to my family anymore
But still ... The Moment he told my im not that Lazy Bastard my Family tells me all the time i am
It almost brought tears to my eyes. Even though im not interested in Painting. This Video got recommendet to me
and im really thankfull for this. And im really thankfull for this Video.
So Thank you Adam. I really needed to hear that
90% of the battle is starting. Once you start something, you'll find it difficult to stop, because you build something. Forcing yourself to start is powerful. Make it easy for yourself.
I never agreed with this phrase because stopping and throwing my work away always was the easiest thing to do for me. No matter if it was a hobby, like art, or something I *had* to do, like studying physics, for example
And BAM! Just like that you were the one to give me the answer I was desperately looking for!
The rewards aspect spoke to me the most, since I always asked myself what makes me struggle and wade through the muck that is learning how to play ridiculously difficult games (fighting games being chief among them).
Even though I'm barely getting good enough to actually enjoy them, I still crave spending time on them because I care about becoming amazing at em. I guess I'll only get further in art and be actually dedicated if I employ the same ethic and remind myself of the rewards daily.
AS do I - I love playing games, but I keep my eyes on the artistic prize rather than the gaming prize - it's amazing how it'll make you drop your dpad and pick up a paintbrush. I abandon games for art all the time now (which feels like a miracle to me)
@@AdamDuffArt Hope I one day could reach that level, thx for being an inspiration!
@@artenstien7100 same here
I feel the "tipping the scale" effect when leaning a new piano piece as well. The first few times I play through reading the sheet music feel scary, but once I know the piece I get this boost in confidence and I find it really easy to practice daily.
Proof that art in many ways is one-in-the same - regardless of the form
The part when you said " You need to stop blaming yourself " got to me the most, personally. Because I have been in a situation where a profesional said that I have " I am guilty " on my forehead. And whatever happens, if I am 10% involved or 100% involved in it, I will always think I am the one to blame for antyhing. And that is something I've been strugling with, even after being aware of it. Even though it is said that the first thing to solving a problem is acknowledging you have one, it is not said it will be and easy problem to solve.
My thoughts on this video are with you. I have been listening to you for a while now, couple of months, and every word you spoke was on point, had a purpose and was thruthfull. It even helped, listening to your ways of doing things helped with working on my things. Keep it up, keep the positivity and sincere words, listening to them helps.
Thank you so much for your story and your thoughts. The worst enemy of progression is the constant guild of not doing enough. You saying that we need to let go of that feeling and be compassionate to ourselves pinpoints it presisely on how to overcome it.
Keep making these amazing videos, as a young person, I really feel like I'm listening to a wise uncle haha
As someone who wants to write this hit me just as hard.
thanks for the words, I needed them. Ive been having problems with being productive and drawing because honestly, I realized drawing makes me feel I'm not good enough for my job, a good job that I get paid well for. and truth is I love this job, everyone is nice, it pays well and I get to work with something I love. I really needed to hear that to realize I earned my job
Thank you so much for this. I'm CONSTANTLY on myself for being lazy and while on the upside it means I've done loads of research into productivity, it also means that I'm so hard on myself I burn myself out before I even get to the meat of what I want to do. But lately I'm coming around to thinking that I need to be gentler and more encouraging to myself, because I really do want to create art, and I'm sad when I'm not at it regularly.
I am currently sitting at my desk; I had use a keyboard in order to do this justice.
I am currently high after having smoked my last joint. I want to create so many things. I have so much negative emotions connected to my art that there was never any chance I could actually do it for fun. It was obligation. The guilt truly is real.
Im writing this to say that I am going to make a goddamn change in my life.
I refuse to let this stop me on my journey to achieve my dreams.
Thank you for your wise words, they struck me to my core.
I needed this sage information and those encouraging words to finally open my eyes.
Clicking this video was the hardest thing i've had to do in a while, but I couldn't be more happy that I did.
Please continue offering these kind of videos to people, its truly important.
I have this thing that whenever I paint or draw or make anything, I hate looking at it so much, it disgusts me. I could’ve painted the Mona Lisa and I would’ve said “she looks dodgy “ and thrown it away. It’s the reason I can’t do any art if I wanted to. It’s extremely annoying when u really want to feel good about having made something. A feeling of deep disappointment hits me....
Maybe you should try some exercises where you know the result will be shit, but you are still practicing. Like blind contour or very short timed sketches.
As long as you're self aware about that you will be consistently able to outsmart your irrational reaction. J mean, you say it yourself. It may not FEEL like enough, but if you can logically PROVE to yourself it is, than that's all you really need, isn't it?
I have this same impulse. What I found that helps me is - I treat it like it wasn't supposed to NOT be shitty in the first place. Like it was a learning experience - I paint and draw things multiple versions at once (ideally 3) so I have room to mess up different things in different versions and at the end treat it like - oooh I learned something from each one so that's okay. Then I gently set all paintings aside and forget they exist and after a while go back to them and sometimes they look better after I've had some space. And if they still suck I just name the mistakes I see so at least it really is something to learn from.
!WALL OF TEXT!
Based on you saying "I can't do any art if I wanted to", I am guessing that you starting out with art (of course, I might be wrong, feel free to correct me). I have a question regarding this:
How do you feel about other people looking at your own art? If you recieve compliments, do you generally accept them or do you just nod and still think about how your own art could be improved? Or rather, do you think about how much better a more skilled artist could have drawn the painting? How much you should improve on the flaws you percieve as massive?
I found that having other people review my own artworks is something that kept me going. In fact, it is the reason I started to get serious with drawing in the first place. Knowing that someone might be looking at a drawing I made and being able to relate to the feelings I had when I drew it is really powerful. It is kind of funny to think about trying to improve just to hear more of these sweet and kind voices cheering you on, but a motivation is a motivation. Perhaps this is not the healthiest reason to pursue art, but I have always liked throwing my ego in a pit and going "Let's see how you can get out of this mess." The grind to get into the hyperfocus flow ultimately feeds into the grind of failing and improving. They are so deeply connected, yet feel so distant.
I hope you are able to battle the struggle. It is not an easy task, but please remember that you are not the only one struggling. There are tons of people who are in the same boat as you are. You don't have to carry your dodgy drawings alone. :)
I needed your wisdom right now ... Asked my guides/angels to help this morning when I climbed up the hill .... I was told to write the book which keeps coming to me. This afternoon I found you talking about art and procrastination and the healing I will get from using colors, textures, shapes and tones as I paint with oils .... miracles come quietly to me as I open my heart.... thank you for your inspiration and sharing. Your words are true.÷))
For me, it feels like it's not my laziness stopping me, it's my *anxiety*, the *people* around me constantly mocking me and making fun of me whenever I try and do something, pick up my sketch book, exercise or write.
I was hoping that during quarantine I'd have free time to work on my commissions, but instead, I'm trying my hardest to get away from everyone and it's impossible. It doesn't matter whether or not I tell them to stop, they won't stop.
I just want to be left alone so I can actually focus and do something productive. But I'm too weak and pathetic to do so...
Don't use that as an excuse, you can Express yourself on that paper, you can make deep art with those kind of feelings, don't care what others think, lock yourself in your room and create!! Pour yourself onto that page!!!
bro are these people acc ur friends? like the fuck?
your not weak or pathetic, if anything your weak for letting those bring you down like that, grab ur nuts an smash out these drawings, remember every good artist has 10,000 bad drawings in them so look at every drawing you do as one less checked off, i believe in you man, you’re already on the right path if your watching this video
You're not pathetic, you have at least some commissions to work on...
I had some toxic people as well they did the same things but now I don't see them anymore because I moved. I suggest for you to put some earphones on with good music u enjoy to drown them out
How can you love a man this much ? MY GOD! I just discovered you like a week ago and I've already seen like 10 videos or more of yours, I'm eternally greatful of how you have change my way of think about artis, about art, and about being an artist, I say all of these from the deepest part of my heart
Everytime I feel down, coming here always makes me feel better almost like a good therpy section and this is the only channel where I watch the whole video not because I'm forced to but because it makes me feel like giving a little thank you for this optimistic video.
I listened to this video three or four months ago when I felt completely useless, incapable of doing good art, terrified that I'll never get a job. Creatively and motivationally I was at my rock bottom. I really thought I had chosen the wrong path when I drop out of university and started taking online courses of concept art and illustration. Your channel and especially this video really helped me get through that time, thank you, so much. I'm listening to it today again, and I'm in tears. You mentioned finishing that one painting that was supposed to change everything and break the cycle of procrastination. I realized I had it two weeks ago when I finally painted something really good. Since then I have finished two more artworks that are also on the same level. I feel so free, happy, and full of hope, as everything is going better now. Also, I started saving up money for your mentorship! Can't wait to sign up for it
I use to really love art when I was back in middle school and I got into the flow of enjoying producing stuff. Then someone one day at school ripped a picture out of my hands I was working and drew on my picture in pen and ruined it. It really made me not want to draw anymore and for the past 12-13 year I haven't really drawn and lost a lot of the skills I was developing. I think this is part due to fearing that my art can be ruined by forces outside of my control and not due to my on skill. Fortunately I have started to try to get back into drawing along with playing piano. It's a very slow process for both but I hope I too will replace my love of video games with a love of art. Your video has been really powerful for me and I am probably going to play it everytime I start doubting the journey I am undertaking to create art I am happy with. Thank you for posting this video.
If you LOVE videogames, you sure shouldn't replace them, just compliment them with your love for art.
Might get you amazing ideas.
I'm so glad I found this channel. This video put a tear in my eye. As an struggling artist and smoker who's just on the verge of relapsing, this really made me think and turn my eye inwards, something that I'm usually afraid to do. Thank you so much
Takes a long time but i keep experimenting and trying to find what i love to draw. Also look a little less what others can do instead of dreaming of what i cant do and what isnt my art.
That might be a technical hurdle Tamaar - there are ways to jump-start your painting process, allowing you to get the wheels turning.
In the academy these 'feelings' are called 'resistances' but the questions that we ask ourselves on why it is hard to get that book or article written are exactly the same. I love drawing when I have to write, I love writing when I have to draw. Many of these feelings, these resistances, have to do with fear of failure, of rejection; anxiety over where to start or how to do things right.
Thank you so much for this video, you really are touching on something at affects creative peoples of all sorts!
"It's not about facts. It's about feelings."
*Benjamin Shapiro would like to know your location*
boa
he is all about feelings lol
*lazer eyes engaged*
Damn bro , you got the whole squad laughing
Rationality Vs Empiricism. You choose your own poison/cure.
I'm an indie game developer and a smoker, so this video was pretty damn relatable. It was really nice to hear the perspective of someone who's overcome their hurdles, especially as someone who's spent years unable to do so.
Thank you for sharing your perspective on this.
As someone who's been drawing for 15 years, I have to say I can relate to what you have to say. It took me a very long time to realise why I wanted to draw in the first place and stop comparing myself to the amazing artists out there. I first had to acknowledge that I love playing video games more than making my art. After that things just got easier.
Before that, every day I didn't draw I truly made myself believe I was a lazy piece of crap who didn't put in the time or effort in to my craft. I can safely say those days are behind me.
Keep staying healthy Adam
I want to first thank you for sharing such a personal side of your story, not many tell it how it is. I had wished I seen this when I was in art school. I had similar issues where I felt like I was lazy, blind, idiotic, and unable to focus. I had over a decade of this issue and I never understood why. You pointed out something that I was missing, this all comes to doubt and uncertainty. I've doubted myself, question everything, unable to go with the "flow". I used video games to distract myself...for over 1000 hours... I didn't tackle my fears and it cost me quite a bit, but now I try to slowly get into good habits, make a challenge for myself, and try to ignore my doubts. If there is one thing I want to add is this, I have read and watched a lot of tutorials of multiple programs and things, but I didn't master a single thing nor practice. If you want to be an artist, you need both education and practice, you cannot do one without the other. This video made me discover your channel today and now I can follow another artist I can appreciate.
This wasn´t just youtube video, it was beautiful audiobook with a story.
Well that was unexpected. I have no thyroid, I take daily meds for it and feel like I've been awake 20 hours all the time. I procrastinate constantly even tho I sit in the perfect modest home studio. Love your videos man. Thanks
One Jordan Peterson quote really stuck with me - "Don't practice what you don't want to become". Felt like it belonged to this topic.
Normally i dont like JP, but god damn thats a good quote
I LOVE that quote, and that would summarize years of my life chasing after careers, re-educating myself over and over until eventually I said "screw this" and focused on what I was passionate about.
what if you can't pinpoint what you want to become? and what if you can't change what you're currently practicing?
@@yeid44 That's what I've been struggling with the most in the past year. Working in an animation studio, doing many different types of projects, feeling like I don't have a unique voice of my own. Practicing drawing, animating, illustrating, 3D and other at the same time. Maybe @Adam had some advice or could even make a video about it :?
@@AdamDuffArt Haha, that last part is the perfect way to describe where I'm at (or about to get to) in my life right now. I studied science for 6 solid years, but have always had artistic and literary talent. For some reason, there has always been a voice in my head, saying, "Yes, yes, creative expression is nice and all, but when it comes to a job, you need to be serious - also, honestly, you lack the talent to make it in anything creative, so don't bother" (like many people's, my inner critic is an asshole :P). And now here I am, 3 years into working at a genetics testing lab, having largely stopped trying with anything creative, and the light is slowly starting to dawn...I HATE THIS. I don't hate science, I love science..but I hate working in science. I love learning and increasing my understanding of the world around me..but I don't want to be at the forefront of research either. As a teen, I mistook interest for passion, and now here I am in my 30's, battling with chronic anxiety and struggling to motivate myself to make a sandwich for dinner. It's bad. My only saving grace has been that, all the while, another voice has been starting to speak up, and getting louder: "Why are you still doing all of this? You don't have to stay in science if you don't want to, you know; all you have to do is admit it, and then we can make a plan" - it's enough to make me weep (which your last video did - excessively). I don't really have a plan yet, but I know that every day that goes by, my resolve to make a change deepens. So, to your statement I shall say, "Sooooooon"...
P.S. Sorry for the long post
The amount of empathy you have for people you've never met is truly truly something I haven't seen anywhere else on UA-cam.
Maybe your experiences have moulded you in such a way but I am thankful to have discovered your channel nonetheless.
Cheers.
I love hearing your thoughts on this man, really enlightening. One thing I'm thinking. It's not just that I don't know that I have to overcome this obstacle of learning to draw on a technical level, it's how much work it is to finally get there is really intimidating. Especially when people who are much better than you look at their own art and go "eh it's not all that". I know other people shouldn't matter but really difficult to escape from.
Hey Adam, thank you so much for this. I used to be a big gamer, had a lot of fun online. After I burned out from my studies, I spend as many hours that I was physically capable of on playing video games. I had no idea on what to do with my time.
The nice thing was: my parents didnt blame me. They saw that I was using games as a way to think. When I was applying for jobs, I would hurdle myself on my letters and after an hour or so, I'd stop, play a bit and suddenly an idea struck me. I'd pencil it down, rinse and repeat.
Then I got my first real job. 40 hour work week, away from home, you name it. And suddenly it struck me. The urge to paint. It was a primal need. During my life I have done this off and on but somewhere within me, this light was lit. I need to draw. My technique lacked and I hated everything that even in the slighted had to resemble something. So I would either remain and hate myself to the end of days, stopped painting or take a different approach.
So I started painting gnomes. Because nobody could tell me what a gnome was supposed to be. It became this shield I could hide behind, this wall where I could make what I wanted to make without self loathing. My bestie tried to encourage me to move beyond this, but to little avail at the time.
Meanwhile I slowly improved my artwork. Applied more technique, started to look around me for inspiration. Started with some plants and then dropped it again. I started to use them as doodles to remember my notes. And then dropped it again. Tried things like perspective which really forced me to come to terms with the self loathing that I felt. Which worked, for a while. And you guessed it, I dropped it again.
There was this one event that changed everything. My coworker, whoms project I joined and is a shy governmental employee from the department of permits asked me this one question. Do you think you can translate the result of our project in terms of gnomes?
I said yes.
And I never told her the amount of panic attacks that I had. I only got angry at her once when she wasnt clear in her instructions in what she wanted to see. Once that fear, that primordial fear taken care of, I got to work. I translated a complex (and flat out boring) policy matter that everyone has been dreading on a spiritual level, in terms of poofy, adorable poof balls.
And when I presented this to her co-workers, it did the one thing that art is supposed to do. It caused emotional resonance. And people started to relate to the work and explain themselves by using the work. Those 2 were the first pieces that I signed and they will be exposed somewhere in that governmental building. My contribution to a better and more effective communication.
Were these 2 works horrible in terms of technique? Yes. Yes they were. However... they served a goal and struck something within people. They also serve as a motivation to grow as an artist. Because I want to make my images more effective, get the meaning across easier, make something that people can latch on to.
So I started to draw more. Drew flowers. Stuff on my desk. Stuff outside. Actively work with lighting. Actively work with color and perspective. I am getting -better- at my fundamentals. One step at the time.
These past couple of years of my life I have been battling with my internal turmoil. My life has been a constant struggle in giving my energy to make other people happy, but in turn I neglected myself to the point that any positive motives I had for my benefit I saw as something selfish. I developed a phobia at the thought of picking up a pencil because all I could think of was my inadequacy and my impending failure. I would just end up hyperventilating at my computer, not a single line drawn. After going to therapy for a little over a year now, I have been on the path to regaining my life and understanding what it means to be happy and proud of my achievements. I have yet to finish a piece at the moment since the day that I started letting my fear control me, but I have been trying to stick to my path to create anything at all. I fall astray a lot, but I try to get back on that horse. It's very tough, but I hope to do good for myself in the future and really create something that I can be proud of.
I really appreciate your effort to give us answers to some questions. All i want is for someone to stop telling me what not to do, to stop saying that something is wrong because then all i have is even more question, and maybe even worse - no questions left to ask. I "can't build bricks without clay" rings very true here, and i appreciate the effort, courage, and humility in giving us something to work with as we go forward.
This is precisely what I needed this lazy Monday morning while I'm sitting here procrastinating on... everything. I'm going to imagine myself feeling good after getting tasks done and get off my butt because of this video. If you ever doubt that your videos make an actual impact on people, don't. THANKS.
Amazing timing. My fear of failure is massive. I'm still in high school and I don't want to go to college or work a monotonous job for the rest of my life. I just want to work on my craft, get big young, and live life by my own rules. But the fear of failure is almost as big as my love for music. This contradiction is eating away at me, making me feel like shit and I am feeling the depression coming back. I try my hardest but it's so hard.
I've been dealing with this most of my adult life. Over the years i've become very self
aware of my feelings and curious, and so I've done my fair share of research.
This subject is both simple and highly complex.
It's simple because it all comes down to making one decision
to sit down and get to work. But making that decision is
dependant on so many factors that can act as hurdles:
- I just ate and i'm feeling sleepy.
- I had this thing I planned to do today and didn't and it's bumming me out.
- I just watched porn and feeling too emotionally numb to do anything.
- It seems like too much work i'd rather play games
- Is it even worth it?
- I can always do it later
- I'm too deep in shit and there's no point in trying
- Wait for the motivation, it'll show up eventually
- There are people around (Family/Friends) I feel weird working near them
- Oh hey! a new UA-cam video/ Facebook notification / Instagram post.
- I haven't eaten in a while....shit i'm sleepy again.
And sometimes It's just this weird feeling of resistence whenever you're thinking
about starting. To tackle this issue, you have to take a step back outside of the box
and take a look at it. That box is our brain.
It's actually all neuropsychology-related, it has everything to do with dopamine-
delivery circuits that you've built in your brain that are related to strong habits/addictions.
A gamer has a circuit that craves video games, and when you're trying to "short" the circuit by resisting
the crave or thinking about doing something productive, the brain basically sends you bad feelings.
And what happens when you're feeling bad? you'll find the fastest
and easiest way to feel good again, and you already know where this leads.
It's the same exact thing with every other type of addiction - Gambling/Porn/Smoking/Drugs/Braindead
entertainment (Random UA-cam videos and social media).
And so what this means is that this part of your brain has you on a leash.
- Trying to run? it tightens up the leash pulling you back and tricking you into thinking "It's not what you want".
- Following the brain? (The crave), good boy, here, have some good feelings.
You can't run away from your brain or fight it. You need to make it your ally.
So the brain is trying to lead you on a trip a certain way (To "video game land" for example).
Like Adam said, you have to find a replacement for that interest.
Whether it's music/art/web development/a business idea/sports career/fitness, it has to
be something that interests you. Adam brilliantly said - You have to attach a feeling to it, and yes,
sitting down and trying to figure out how that interest is making you feel is a crucial part in the
proccess of altering your brain's direction. When your brain feels that this new interest
is the "New Hype", it will loosen up that old dopamine circuit and create a new path towards
your newly found interest. And as you persue it, that new circuit will strengthen and
the old one will perish.
One of the most important things in your new path is to enjoy it and celebrate accomplishments.
Whether you:
- Learn something new
- Discover newly found energy to persue different things
- Feeling healthier than before (Both physically and mentally)
- Seeing positive effects of it on your social life
Take a few seconds to stop and observe the positive feeling, let it sink in.
The reasons for that are:
- Like Adam said - it will create distance from your old ways
and strengthen the new circuit in your brain.
- When you're on the verge of relapsing to your old ways, you'll have that feeling as
an anchor to remind your brain - "Nah, this trip looks more fun, let's go there".
Andrey Urman Thank you for this comment! It struck me so hard reading it...
Hey, that was a really interesting read. Just seems to validate what I already have been self aware for over a year and that I have a video game addiction. There's quite a good reason I have a hard time playing even more traditional RPG's with a good story to chew on and instead favor short burst multiplayer games or MMO's that constantly have prizes showering on me with that dopamine.
Can addiction ever be returned into moderation? I've definitely had previous bouts of addictions and then moments where I was very disciplined and in control of my gaming time as well as my work time for hobbies (albeit disorganized so weak progress, but the routine was established).
If I manage to break the leash on games as it currently stands, is it possible to have it return to something in moderation and controlled, or is it kind of like "too late been there done that" and I have to cut it out completely? I know it sounds 100% like I already am making excuses to avoid cutting an addiction (like an addict would) but one has to be realistic as well. My friends, my life, my alternate hobbies and my personality are defined by video games. It's not that I think it's impossible to fully detach myself from video games and flush everyone around me (including friends) but rather that it's unreasonable because everything around me stands on the pillars of that gaming culture and foundation
I suppose the obvious answer is "it depends, can you respect those new boundaries or are you susceptible to relapse" but I feel like asking anyways since you did the research on the topic. Your comment and this video seems to heavily imply that I would be permanently replacing one addiction with another in a sense, just one that I would have deemed more productive.
@@tranceaddict11 You'd have to replace it completely. It's like Drugs/Gambling/Smoking - You can't go back to it moderatly, you'll relapse for sure.
I feel like abit of an imposter saying these things tho, since I'm still addicted. I haven't decided on my priorities in life yet. I know exactly what I need to do in order to be successful, but gaming is hard wired in me and is standing in the way. Shit's rough.
@@AndreyUrman Yeah I mean I quit smoking easy there's little to lose in the grand scheme, but games? My friends only game, my decoration is game related, my inspiration for piano songs is game related, my inspiration for drawing is game related...music I listen to, etc, etc ,etc. It's not just flushing an addiction it's flushing my identity and whole life lol. It's some tricky shit
@@tranceaddict11 There's the other option of perssuing a game-related career, like game development, game design, music composition for a gaming company, esports commentator etc.
the clear definition that videogames give direct visible and expectable reward with the uncertainity of painting was very helpful for me.
Bruh. This is so true. I’ve seen so many videos telling me “who cares if at first your art is trash, no one is gonna know about it,. Practicing will make you grow even if it is trash.” and I agreed but my body for some reason still rejected the act of writing(an art I want to get better at, even still). I noticed I felt fear and anxiety, although I knew I shouldn’t really care for writing garbage. I draw and I produce music. I enjoy doing those things and I noticed I felt pretty good doing these things but for some reason, the song writing part was always rejected by my body even though I forced through some writing because consciously, I still wanted to do it. But something in my subconscious didn’t allow me to. Not until I stopped all the negative thinking and instead gave myself a mantra and a meditative breathing technique to repeat once I began to feel like my body wants to reject this activity. Not sure if it was because in the past, in high school or something I really hated it, but since I graduated, I wanted to become better at this. “You got this” I repeated this so many times over and over in my head that I began to believe it, and so whenever I felt like negative thoughts/ fear of failure started to come, I turned to use my mantra to quiet those subconscious thoughts, and it works. It changed how I felt about trying something new and wanting to become better at it. but you can’t just do it one day and forget about it. You gotta be persistent. This video helped me realize what that feeling was. Thanks! Hope other people out there find the same enlightenment I did.
This helped, specifically how creating that space with videogames adjusts my mindset. I got into mhw iceborne recently and it was quickly getting to that point where i would make excuses "i'll do the art tomorrow" at which point it was just an excuse which repeated every day until it reached a point where sitting down to do the art was a chore and i couldnt understand how i felt. i spent a few days just focusing on an art piece, after a few days i decided "oh i'll go play monster hunter for 2 hours" but when i got into the game i looked around and it had almost traded places with how i felt about the art when i was just playing this game every day, the game had become the chore.
Exceptional video, really resonated with my own issues lately.
Really needed to hear this. Thank you, Adam.
Time to finish a painting i started weeks ago.
You're very welcome my friend :)
I’m not the one to write comments on anything, let alone UA-cam. I gotta say something here... Out of all the videos I have ever watched on overcoming limits and finding purpose, you sir have touched my heart and mind in a miraculous way. I found your video while I was smoking and while I’m not ready to quit just yet, I now know I have the power to. I have the power to overcome all of my creative struggles as an artist as well. Alas, also as a gamer. I respect you, I value your videos and I thank you, as honest and sincere as I could be. Thank you.
I literally stared at ablank page for hours today and i didn't know why. why i couldn't at least try to make something even a simple doodle. Thank you now i know what was holding me back. Now i can fight it. Now i can finally start doing something I'm passionate in
i wont lie, this video nearly made me cry. ive always felt so lazy and stupid for never being able to commit to anything, including drawing, and instead finding respite in videogames. fully realizing that as long as a only want to draw when i feel guilty about it is terrible for my mindset has really helped me looking at drawing from a different perspective.
I wish I was procrastinating making art right now. I have four AP essays I need to do for English and US History and instead I’m working on my comic. Life is stressful
Years ago I drew like crazy. I posted, and posted artwork because I never really cared for criticism or anything.
Nowadays I'm doing nothing. My motivation for art slowly faded away as I stopped drawing and saw everyone else's work, I was either really jealous or pitied myself for not having the same skills as said artists.
And now I'm on one heck of a challenge to bring my creativity back, but most of the things I want to do are too complex, and I find myself midway of the sketch, already lost the fun and drive, and I just set it aside as another chicken scratch vomit of a sketch and stop for a while.
I honestly don't know where to go from here, but I thank you so much for this, you don't know how much I needed this.
actually, I am struggling for a while where its the feelings that make me unable to lift the pen. I feel emotional, borderline physical pain whenever I want to draw. if I recall it started from frustration. For me drawing is hard and taxing mentally. The only moments where I feel free to draw when Im in a what I call a drawing high/rush of madness where I feel the NEED to draw what I feel.
i was riding the wave of success for few months but very recently I started to get back into the being lazy relm, watching this video now is a pure bless for me. still I don't know what to do next or what to break next but at least I now know what not to do. i quit smoking few months back, definitely your words reached to my heart.
Can I just say, you're an incredibly strong person for quitting cigarettes. My mother has been smoking since she was 13 (she's 60 now) and it's taken a toll on her health, the health of her children (my sister and I both have asthma, probably from inhaling too much smoke) and the health of her grandchild. She's a very strong woman, and the fact she could never rid herself of this is a testament on how hard quitting cigarettes can be. That you could do it is very impressive.
I've got so many artist friends going through these feelings, and blaming themselves for all these hardships. I've found myself to be lucky as I'm always trying new things and learning to enjoy stuff. trying to make new merch, new fancy artstyles ect..
listening to this calms me as I'm arting and I'm hoping it can help some of my friends who probably don't know that they feel exactly as you say in the videos.
It makes me feel suffocated because I have so many things to do through out the day and during it I keep getting distracted by my own thoughts, and I end up loosing more time because I'm not really interested in studying right now, although the stuff that I'm learning it's really interesting.
My chest keeps thightening and thightening and I don't what to do about it.
I took too many days to relax and let all the stress but it doesn't help, I'm always back to square one the day I have to start studying again.
Working very, very hard to make my dream of being a working author a reality, and I draw continuous and high quality narrative inspiration from video games. BUT... whatever I gain from them, they are a constant obstacle to me getting my writing done. One of the biggest pulls I feel to playing a game is that I get to experiece inspiration fully realized, skipping the painful process of building it from scratch. Finding this video was serendipitous. Thank you.
A fine point indeed. I don't think most people can relate to until the deed has been done.
To be honest most won't be able to reach that level of dedication... I feel now more than ever to be true. To invest in something so grand, be it skill and learning requires an effort beyond normal. I'm self taught though, can't speak for those doing school, but from what I've seen in so many years, most people choose to be artists cause they are lazy in the first place.
I'm not trying to discourage people who feel down and are trying to pick up themselves to be more constructive, but reality does hit like a truck... However, its true you can get there. I was very eager in my younger years but didn't have the "drive" to get through and reach higher levels.
Still though, battling my own thoughts everyday even after 15 years of doing this. Only in the last 7 years I was able to get in the right frame of mind and work really hard.
I've completed the 365 day challenge, to iterate how it was, after the 2 first months, it was hell... But by the end what it gave me was a will to never give up and keep working and learning.
"You have to get to a certain point before being able to express yourself". It's so true. I guess I know that the point of 'fun' is so far away right now, that levelling up is more appealing. I'm interested to try a 'distraction detox' . Luv you Adam
You know what "kills" me? My own imagination. In my mind I have the idea of an amazing drawing I'd love to do, but when I start "drawing" I know I won't be able to do it, because how I draw in my mind is so different when I try to draw with my hands: I can't get the pose correctly because I don't know how to draw it or the point of view looks weird or the proportions are wrong, or the eyes are not equal or the hands look like mutants... And that makes me quit and play video games. Because I ask so much of myself, because I'm way too perfeccionist with what I do that's what's wrong with me: I want to be perfect at the first try.
I find myself looking back at old drawings when I had a graphic tablet and I remember when I was first drawing them I thought they were okay but now I want to delete them, even tho I won't do it because they have a special place in my heart as they are the first drawings I made with the graphic tablet. And now whenever I try to draw with pencil everything looks bad, I can't draw a single face without thinking it looks really bad.
All these problems combined with my self-hatred product of my inexistant self-esteem make stop procrastinating so difficult I can't even think about taking a pencil to draw because the first thought that appears into my mind is: it will look terrible.
I've even tried to start modeling with Blender but it's so damn difficult I quit it 15 mins after starting.
Anyway sorry for the rant but this video made me think about it and seeing everyone's comments with their own problems made me want to post mine. By the way, English is not my first language so I'm sorry if I made mistakes while writing this.
This describes my situation so much
The same thing used to happen with me, I hated my own drawings because they never turned out how they did in my head, but whenever I was just drawing for the fun of it, not letting my thoughts directly guide me, I ended up with something that I could appreciate. Even more so, my own work inspired me. And it was the work that I wasn't even really trying on. I like to think of expectations of your own skills as expectations of a person. Nobody is perfect, you can't expect someone to act exactly as you want them to. You can't expect an art piece to look exactly as you want it to. The best thing you can do is just put effort into it without setting extreme expectations.
I think the problem is that it's impossible to get it to look just how you see it in your head. Whenever I draw it always ends up completely different from how I imagined it, especially when you get into the details (that's why I like sketching more than anything else lol, it represents my original idea the most because of its vagueness). You need to set a bar for yourself of 'this is close enough'. Slowly, as you work on more pieces to the end, you will begin to forget about the original thought you had in your head and focus on how your drawing actually looks. Our heads can create beautiful images but we are in reality, and must work with what we have.
I'm just like you. I always discarted the drawings that I felt that weren't good enough.
You should paint. Thats closer to how your mind draws me thinks.
I... yeah this was exactly what I needed... thank you. This was exactly what I needed to hear. I don't really have anything special to mention or talk about. I'm an artist who struggles with procrastination and this was just exactly what I needed.
Thanks.
17:50 "producing artwork when you feel guilty"
This one line totally resinated with me so much lately.
I feel so guilty whenever I'm not working that even the thought of taking time off makes me feel anxious. Because of this I work 7 days a week either on client work or personal projects. I do get bursts of motivation but they come rarely, maybe every other month. I want to get that motivation more frequently but I haven't figured out how yet. So I'm just drawing because I feel like thats what I should be spending the majority of my time on. If you want to be good at art and be successful you have to work really hard and put in the time. Or at least thats what I tell myself.
Your abosulty fantastic. Thank you for your comment. I am certain that you have helped more than just me , not feel so alone in this. I know they must me a hand full of other real people who read this and understood what you felt. Thank you. Please know you have something so valuable within you. ~froshua
hey! I relate so much to this. I'm not a professional artist though, my major is a bit distant from an art field, illustration and stuff...so when I don't draw cuz of uni homework I feel quilty, and when I actually draw I feel quilty too. Because it's not enough and I'm not enough. I've finished one illustration a couple of days ago and I can't do anything right now, scrolling through pictures my favourite artists post online and feel kinda pathetic. I hope we'll get through this somehow hah
@@FroshTheStampede thank you, I really appreciate your supportive comment.
@@hiendarinenkoray
I totally get the same feeling when scrolling through other artists! I love to see their artwork but it always triggers my anxiety. I hope one day I wont feel so guilty or self-deprecating when I look at other artists work. Instead to be proud of my work rather than constantly compare it or tell myself I'm not doing enough. Good luck on your art journey, I'm sure your doing the best you can with time you have free.
@@tianna7589 :D we're totally in the same boat
I've said it before and I'll say it again - your art channel is arguably the best thing that's happened to me in my artistic life.
I'm literally going through this same issue - buried under so much work that I've let pile up, for reasons I didn't understand, and it's just ended up in a cycle of me feeling guilty for not working, and procrastinating with games, which leads to even more guilt.
this video is an amazing first step for me - thank you so much!
perfect timing adam, i really needed this
I'm very happy to be there for you :)
I am a 21 years old man and im sobbing at 1 am right now. For years now I felt like there was no reason for me to exist. I was just going through notions, routines and distractions just to forget and feel a bit better in the current passing moment. I had no plans made for my life because, frankly, I wasn't anticipating to be alive at this point. This video really hits me right in the spot. I'm scared of being inadequate
. And looking at a finished artwork, or any professional performing their craft filled with that rotten sense of inadequacy.
Im staring at my arm right now; its completely shredded in self-inflicted blade wounds. I wish to never fall that low again, to be so empty that only the stinging bite of razor can make me feel something. I want to feel needed and perhaps art will allow me to do so. Thank you for this video, it might turn out to be quite literally life changing.
Everyone reading this comment, I hope you find your place in life. Its a task I've given to myself. Take better care of yourselves than I did of me.
As an emerging developer of videogames, I no longer enjoy playing videogames.
I love the art and the craft and the programming, it fuels my soul.. but most games don't give me gameplay that feels meaningful. I'd always rather do something else, further my learning, talk with my girlfriend, something.. I still haven't found the answer to whether this is good or bad.
I guess we'll see.
I think you’re burnt out
@@Pitman856 Nah, I'm still Loving game development. I just don't know how to feel about playing videogames anymore.
@Whited Out I've played Hotline Miami, not yet Doom. I enjoyed Hotline Miami, but that was a long while ago.
YourZombieMop I’m saying you are burnt out on playing them. Take off a month or two. Don’t break the break. I get like that sometimes with books and video games where I don’t enjoy them after awhile and need to take time off.
@@Pitman856 Awe man, thanks :)) the thing is, I haven't been playing them in the past months at all. I'll pick something up about once a month and find myself unfulfilled.
What a great advice! Thanks so much for being so honest, humble and truthful. I play games and watch a lot of UA-cam videos to learn from other artists and find out what I’m missing. During the quarantine, I’m taking myself time to study other areas of art. I started a painting and it is waiting for me to finish. Too much going on, but I know I can do it. No excuses, things come up and there I am stopping what I was doing and there I am in square one and starting over. Thanks for all the encouragement and positive feedback. Blessings and take care.
Thank you Adam. My art procrastination feeling is that I'm a fraud and I will never succeed as the pros do.
Well I encourage you to read many of the other comments on this video - you'll see how much you're surrounded by kindred spirits :)
@@AdamDuffArt Thank you. I have read a few, and its inspiring to see all the positivity. I will work hard on my emotions. Its journey I want. :)
This is called imposter syndrome - have it hardcore! 😭
This haunts me on how much it relates to me ,the shame of knowing i want to be an artist but i don't put in how much time i should be putting in, i will be better.
Thank you
Some people have a voice that I can listen to for hours regardless of what it's about. I'm remarkably jealous
I have a great UA-camr for you - Vaatividya. I also like LEMMINO but not everyone likes his voice in my family. I personally can listen to him for hours. Oh and of course, David Attenborough - he's the grandfather I never had :)
I've listened to Vaati's lore videos way too much already haha, but I'll give Lemmino a look
Happened upon this and the timing couldn't have been better as I've been particularly struggling with these existential questions and feelings recently. To be honest, I've always struggled with similar dilemmas (haven't we all?), but I don't want to overthink it at this point. I just know that this is what I really needed to hear right now. You definitely opened my eyes to the role of utilizing the fundamentals, the process itself, in pushing through fear, doubt, self-sabotage, etc.... pick your personal poison. Thanks, Adam. I don't know you, but it's evident that we have a lot in common. Be well.
It's anxiety. Basically. It's almost physically painful in my case. Getting started is the worst part of doing anything.
I saw this video randomly in my feed and, being a chronic procrastinator, I clicked it and I'm so glad that I did. Your comments about the fear of that unknown, that lack of motivation to really push yourself to find that self-reward, really resonated with me. I'm a musician and I've found myself doing even the most menial of household tasks when other time-wasters get boring to avoid practicing my instruments or studying up on theory. I've kept calling myself lazy, unmotivated, undeserving of success, whatever it is to attempt to shame myself into putting in more effort but nothing works.
I've realized that it really is that fear of getting into the thick of it, immersing myself into wide world of music theory and experimentation, spending weeks practicing just to get one piece down. I keep telling myself "what on earth have you gotten yourself into? how could you possibly become even slightly skilled or knowledgeable in any one of these subjects? how on earth do you think you can do this? how could you play this piece that you fumble with at even the slightest attempt? don't kid yourself." i keep comparing myself to better musicians, even one of my closest friends who is so naturally motivated he could sit at a drum kit or a piano for five hours at a time. I keep expecting to sit down one day and say "this is the day that I'll be like them." and raising myself to that bar has only made me more fearful of that sea of work and practice. it probably doesn't help that people will ask me how a project is going, how I've been coming along, and I lie and tell them that it's been great and feel even worse because of it.
I've even had periods like "riding that wave" like you mentioned. there have been times where I find a transcription of a song that I love and I sit at a piano, because I really want to play it or transcribe it, and even though it's damn near impossible to play at first, I'll have it down in a week. but I don't ride the wave and keep the groove, so to speak - I "reward" myself by slacking off afterwards, forget all about the high that I had from it, and go back to square one.
This has given me some great food for thought and self-reflection. Thank you for making this video and I hope you're doing well.
What if the art that im producing is mostly technical practice, like perspective and figure drawing. Do i reward myself by doing more technical practice or reward myself by making my own thing? Thanks for the great video as always!
@Mage Animator thank you for your advice, im actually doing something similar to that right now! Problem is i think im practicing too much as supposed to drawing for funs sake.
I've been struggling with procrastination for most of my life. (I'm 28 now). I've done therapy, counseling and basically felt like a failure, but this video has probably been the greatest help and encouragement I've had so far. So thank you for making this
why I cant get fully into the art groove is because I feel like even if I was some god artist that could draw perfect drawings I still would be never noticed, never getting comments, commissions, attention, despite me putting all art on social media cus social media is luck based after all.. Might as well play games where I get more attention from my teammates in game or can relate to friends lol more than my art
this made me sad because it made me realize i often felt obligated to playing games, because they gave me a sense of fulfillment that immediate work and career simply did not. I found myself feeling like I NEEDED to play games, and it makes me sad to realize its a hobby that just doesnt coincide with the work I want to complete. Maybe someday i can go back and enjoy them, many were genuinely inspiring to my work but I just can't keep living a double life. If i want to find success with what I am working towards, I have to let it go, this part of me that was so important. I didn't expect to feel this message so deeply but its something I didn't even consider an option. I don't do that much art although I want to get more into it, but your advice has resonated with me for my other passions just as deeply.
Thank you Adam, for making me realize what I never even knew i could realizea
One thing I feel obligated to point out is that many people experiencing these things are actually suffering from executive disfunction. Yes, they have associated the act of drawing to a feeling of anxiety, but to people with executive disfuncion EVERY action is anxiety inducing because life feels like and endless list of chores. After a while you become unable to do simple things like brushing your teeth or showering because all the things you normally have to do anyway (such as eat and get out of bed) are enought to completely exaust you. Drawing is a big thing and it consumes a lot of time, so it starts to feel like an impossible tasts because it wears you out so much.
Honestly in these cases I really don't feel like going cold turkey with video games and just drawing instead would help. Anything that is a continuous actions you perform every day will just wears you out a lot just by thinking about, and because of that it becomes even harder to perform the action itself. I cut out video games multiple times and it only made it worse, because I had all this anxiety and nothing to funnel it. I would just lay in bed feeling incredibly anxious about all the things I should be doing but couldn't. I feel like telling people that giving up video games is the only way to stop procrastinating is enough to make many people give up being an artist altogether, because video games are such a big part of many peoples lives.
So two things: look for a psychologist. I'm serious. Being able to talk to someone about this difficulty after suffering in silence for so long in incredibly helpful. They can help you get your toughts in order and find a solution that fits your case. And no, you don't have to tell them all your most intimate issues. If you only want to sort out your procrastination it's perfectly fine. Second: In my case, the best solution was to completely forbid myself from playing for only a portion of the day, and certain days of the week. Before that, I would play during the day and so by the time I had finally finished all my work at night it was nearly time to go to bed, so I would just tell myself I could draw the day after, but just did it all over again the next day. The incredible thing about this is that you start to appreciate your gaming time way more now that you know it's limited.
Bleach Martini So, how did you get in touch with your emotions? I can't seem to get in touch at all -- it feels like there's a glass pane between me and emotions, which is why I rely on logic...
Bleach Martini Brilliant answer.. means more to me than I can say. You're a star 🌟
I rally appreciate this answer, lately i have been feeling down. I just don't have the drive that i used to have to practice and it feels like everything is a terrible chore lately.
very true about the 'chore' thing. i used to get plenty of artworks done and be totally fine with producing them, then after one single assignment where i got stuck on the technical barrier, my teacher started continuously urging me to *do* stuff - "keep working youre not doing enough" sort of thing. ever since then ive been unable to joyfully put pen to paper and create something because i hold it off the same way i avoid chores like you said. it doesnt feel like something i just do, it feels like something i *have to* do and its tiring like a chore
thank you for this comment, it is a huge help
I cried watching this. This video made me realize hard truths about so meny of my own emotions and actions revolving around my own 8 process. I have so much I need to think on. I'm so overwhelmed. Thank You
The part about classic (warcraft) taking effort or being hard back when it was "Vanilla" is quite faulty, but the rest is worth thinking about.
It's a heapload harder today and requires a lot more thinking along with skill, plus knowledge.
Getting 40 people isn't hard, getting 40 people who knows how to play is, even if its such a small thing as "Follow the mark 100% of the time" - people still fail.
Now you need 9 people (The least) to follow about 5-7 different necessary mechanics, and that's a lot harder than 1 - which it used to be.
However - back at your topic of this, you can also consider what your hobbies are - if they are Drawing only, and you're just gaming to "pass time", then Gaming isn't a hobby.
But if you have gaming AND drawing as a hobby, it becomes a lot harder to put it so simply as getting to the feeling of "meh" about gaming alone.
The "meh" feeling can very well just be overcumbrance of self doubt or lack of energy, and that energy does not necessarily refill cause you quit one of your hobbies.
You can pursue more than one thing in life, and nobody has to be an expert -
Life gets to hardmode if you have a brain full of imposter syndrome, anxiety, depression and especially if you suffer from Anhedonia (look it up if you don't know what this is).
There are a lot of people out there suffering from a lot of mental weights, and in todays society we're not taught love - we're taught "Use and move on".
Hence why I disagree while also agreeing with you - at the same time (Cept for the WoW part cause that was just not true in and of itself.).
Another person in the comment section mentioned "Subconssious weight" or something of the sort, where you've put off things and don't realise it's actually eating at your energy.
I am fully aware that I would feel better if I stopped saying "I'll do it tomorrow", for example, cause that would remove one thing I "have to do" either now or in the future,
which would leave me with more energy to pursue whatever I do for a hobby - with a positive feeling.
I'm still on the journey of learning through my battles with depression, anhedonia, anxiety and autism - and knowing what I am doing wrong, is not the same as knowing how to fix it.
Also wish to add, I am not trying to disrespect you in any way - just finding some additional critique on your ongoing mention of Warcraft, which is heavily influenced by nostalgia-goggles (Even if some argue it is not, it 100% is -- As I also remember parts of my past life experiences as harder than it actually was, or better than it was, same with taste: We change, grow, get more experience and learn for our entire life.)
I'm really glad you post these videos as they always offer some food for thought for me (and clearly MANY others!) - and also sparks me personally to "think harder" about certain aspects of my life, as well as giving me personally confidence to even put up a discussion against some of your words.
It's great that youtube exists for these reasons, to spread knowledge and to learn - as well as perhaps re-think steps we thought were right.
What this video - and comment section - do for me personally, is make me DO SOMETHING rather than just think dark thoughts about why I am even alive.
Listening to people talk, hearing or reading other views, helps.
I get a lot less "Do it tomorrow" after these types of videos, since they help me reconsider what I am doing at this moment and what I can -perhaps- do to change it; if even for an hour or two.
The small steps help. Like making your bed can be a huge accomplishment for some of us. :)
So I wanted to come back, and make sure you do not take it the wrong way - as I know I can be quite "filter-less" in how I say things.
Thanks for your videos, and your very beautiful art.
I needed this message today.. I am an artist, started my career in publication, during my senior year of high school. Also happy to quit smoking. It’s day 4, smoke free and I’m so moved by your testimony. Thank you for your transparency. This was a very powerful episode for me.