@@RealCoachLee sir...I'm really upset...he brokeup with me with alot of anger ,abusive language and block me from every where.... Sir I contact him through every possible sources but he didn't talk to me....sir what to do..I really love him...I'm goin into depression .....🥺
Something to keep in mind my beautiful people...that part of you that they awakened inside you still exists, and it’s ready to come back. Stay strong and either your ex, or someone else just as good or better will come to you 💜
My ex broke up with me around 3 weeks ago... started no contact 2 weeks ago. Coach lees videos keep me going and being strong. Also working on myself. Fingers crossed she comes back🤞🏻 thanks coach lee.
Watching this in tears, thank you for being heaven sent and helping me stay strong in no contact. I did no contact for a month before and no going back to it (three months after the breakup). So grateful for your help.
@@RealCoachLee I believe for my situation it’s commitment- I was just told the advice to trying and take things presently with them (but they have already asked for space and to work on themselves alone) should I remain in NC?
@@RealCoachLee also one month after the breakup I broke it to tell him I was talking to someone new- and he wanted to work things out (and then changed his mind) so it kind of restarted the breakup for me a month and a half ago (is that common for the dumper to try and come back and change their mind)
He broke up with me in almost 10 months ago. I've started NC in the beginning of July. It was hard, but now I feel a lot better. I've been listening to your advices and I have to say that you've helped me. Thank you
@@AlexandraRuizMartinez30 He did. Before I decided to go NC. I also met him 3 months ago when I was at the party with mutual friends. He came to us and said "hello". I replied to him but later kept staying in NC.
My fiance that I had a 10-year relationship with, recently broke up with me. I had started watching Coach Lee's videos and started the No Contact Rule (minding on my business, keeping up with life and giving up hope of us ever getting back together (Hope will turn against you when you have a broken heart)) really uplifts my confidence. Thanks and more power on your channel!
Got dumped, just agree'd with her terms and wished her all the best. Not going to plead/beg for someone who is unworthy, No contact here I come baby lets do this, fuck it
I didn't get to finish that. But after 8 months and listening to you through some really hard times, it brought a lot of understanding, patience and finally figuring out what it is that I do want in my life. Thank you so much for all of your encouragement and I'm very happy to say that after 8 months me and my ex are back together and stronger than ever hopefully it will always stay this way but I did want to tell you thank you Kathy
He is the man listen to every single word he is saying. I watched many of his videos and it helped me not only get my ex back but also gain self confidence.Yet we are not back together but she texted me asking about me and much more.So stick to No contact don't bother them by calling and texting
Thanks Lee, I've been watching almost all your videos since my breakup. It was a year and 3month relationship, after 2 weeks and 3 days of no contact he called today, I missed the call though so I was confused what to do but I watched your video that said we should not ignore so I sent him a message that I'm sorry I missed his call, he replied that he just wanted to check how I'm doing and he'll call me back once he's free. I'm so super excited, I never thought he'll text me or call like ever bcos of how it ended and he ended it with he wish me well in life and that was a sign he won't reach me. Thank you, you're an angel. I couldn't believe I'll be able to stay without reaching out to him, I did what you said to do during breakup and got myself busy
Oh yes, we started talking and he told me how much he missed me and want us to be together, he said he's vulnerable with me, we belong to each other... All those crazy talks and when he calls we talk for hours. He's doing all the things I did to try to keep him but I realized the more he try the more I don't want him anymore. I find it hard to love the same guy as crazy as I did when I cry for him not to leave and he eventually left and came back. I thought this would be different cos I've never experienced it the way I did but gradually my love is fading
@@ojiatavictoria4881 hey its been a while but I found your comment and would like to hear what happened ....because I feel the same would happen to me...right now my brain wants what it can't have but if he starts chasing me again I really don't know how I would want him again as it has affected my attraction too.
@@natalijaseme8725 We're still together. It turns out he wants to work the relationship with me. You can't keep a man unless he wants to stay and he'll do everything possible to make it work, if you really love him you'll have to be patient but don't chase him. He calls me everyday and he still loves talking to me for hours.
I can speak for most ppl when I say we DO NOT feel like they miss us. If anything it feels like they're getting over it since we're completely x out of their lives.
I certainly understand that you feel that way. Most people do because we assume that if they miss us that they would contact us and that since we don't know what is going on with them that they are living a great life without us - and they could be for a time, certainly in the relief stage. Trust me when I tell you that 20 years in the relationship-coaching industry has taught me that even if someone breaks up with you, they still often miss you. No contact is not a slam dunk, fool-proof thing, but it does work very often. I do, however, understand that because it feels like you are doing nothing, that it feels like nothing is happening. I suggest watching this video on the stages your ex (usually) goes through during no contact at ua-cam.com/video/wYEAWNvtaTk/v-deo.html
From being a dumpee now I’m the dumper. And he’s chasing me now. The truth that he has full of pride. No contact rule is very powerful. I blocked him and now i moved on after a month of break up. Thank’s God and thank you coach Lee.❤
You are a brilliant man Lee. I have watched 500 hours almost of videos on UA-cam for ex help. You are beyond the most brilliant. Your metaphors. Similarities. The cat was great. I couldn’t help but laugh at how grand your runner and chaser example were. I laughed and smiled at how I’ve never thought of it like that. Whether you created these or not is irrelevant. They hit my core. You are all I listen to now. You meet my expectations entirely. If I wait long enough. Any of yours videos solve my daily problems. You are truly a master of your craft. Thank you kindly.
25 days No contact works for me and my ex reach out on me and apologising for the bad things she has done and asking forgive forgiveness but I’m being calm and not rushing up given my self enough time to reply her message like letting it be at least 3 or 4 hours to reply her and I never thought she will reach out because of how hard and angry she was at me when she break up with me
Thank you for this! I appreciate your honest approach and pull no punches attitude. I am that begged , pleaded cryer, gifter .. I have her on no contact for about a month .. it’s been 4 months total. Our friends are saying she lights up when she speaks of me , that she loves me but still no contact from her and after sending her 2 morning love poems she blocked me ... I’m moving on and will keep the door open for her. Not looking for a rebound or another woman .. what comes is what comes .. I am a stronger man then the man she asked to leave .. I believe in my heart it was the circumstance and not loss of love that has us separated right now .. no drugs no alcohol no violence .. just lots of stress in her life including me being needy .. thanks Coach !!! I appreciate you!!!
I never used to believe in psychology, I am happy today to not just believe it, but love it as well. Thank you Coach Lee, even if she doesn't want me back, I am comforted with your words man. I appreciate you!
I’ve commented on several of your videos coach Lee . I’m in no contact unless he reaches out and I’ve replied accordingly . I’m always pleasant & cordial . I hope to God I have a success story to tell you and Coach Ken who I have a session with next week. It can’t come fast enough . With love and respect 💙🙏
I do not have enough words to thank all that I am learning with you Coach Lee, Thank you very much for putting so much effort into making this channel as educational as it is productive. Thank you :)
@J J Sounds great! But my story is a bit complicated and at this point I'm not sure as to what I want. I believe I am willing to give it another try but only under the right circumstances.
@J J ultimately, I feel if you think its worth giving it another shot then you should. But I also feel that you should give it time before you make a decision as to what you really want to do. For me it's been 3 months and I'm just starting to begin to have a little more clarity as to the road I'm open to exploring.
@J J Thanks for the insight. To be honest I'm not sure what will happen. I'm just focusing on myself and if the opportunity presents itself I'll deal with it then, but as for now I'm moving on.
Almost 7 months for me. After 8 years together. At this point, I don't even know if I could let someone back in my life who caused me so much pain and grief for so long...
I’ve been with my gf for 5.5 years. We have had our ups and downs but grew emotionally and spiritually. Last Nov. she wanted NC so she could “ focus on herself” as a codependent. I didn’t understand NC or know there was such a thing. I would send her a text or email , not knowing if I was blocked or whatever. I was in the hospital for 3 days. She reached out with a beautiful card and a necklace that said “ new beginnings”. Mixed messsge. Since that I went NC. It’s been 42 days. She was the love of my life. Not giving up yet but will maintain NC. ❤️
25 days No contact works for me and my ex reach out on me and apologising for the bad things she has done and asking forgive forgiveness but I’m being calm and not rushing up given my self enough time to reply her message like letting it be at least 3 or 4 hours to reply her and I never thought she will reach out because of how hard and angry she was at me when she break up with me
I've watched all your videos like a 100 times in the last month. I start playing every time I feel anxious. Hopefully will have a success story at the end of this. The break up made me change who I am completely, I gave up my bad habits, got healthier, and have read books on attachment styles, love languages etc. If she ever comes back I will make her the happiest woman alive.
13 Hours after I made this comment my ex reached out, she said she missed me and she loved me we were on the phone for hours and we're pretty much back together. Hope this give people hope. But remember, you HAVE to have changed, and made positive changes in your life in the time you were separated, I did and she could see it. If you haven't changed they won't come back to you, and even if they do you will lose them again. Now that I have her back I will work even harder to become a better person, so if you have the attitude where you think ok I got them back now I can relax, you wont keep them. So just take the time to improve yourself, don't be too eager when they reach out, show them that you've changed and give them the space to miss you. Good luck.
Update: My Ex did return, only to ruin my life, because she's a borderline. She left again but this time I want her to stay away. If your ex is borderline etc my suggestion is stop watching these videos and move on. Change your number, and if she reaches out ignore her or tell her you're with someone else.
Honestly dude I’m a highly analytical type person and I really needed to hear some of the specific things you said in this video. Honestly my encouragement went up ten times after watching this. Thank you 🤘
You have been a voice I needed during this time,26yr relationship marriage,together since we were teens,this has been the hardest thing ive ever been faced with in my entire life.. i love my wife with everything
Coach Lee, please create a communication on breakups for purely rational, logical reasons like situational problems or things you or the other person won't change. Thank you for soothing my aching heart❣️
The relief period can last forever. Its been 10 months since he broke up with me. I keep going through stages of deep depression. We have a 4 year old. Every time I see my ex to take our child he is bouncing off the walls with happiness. His life has improved infinitely. This doesn't work. And I will always be heartbroken.
My sweetheart broke up with me after a 1.5 year. It has been painful, but I've done what you mentioned here, no contact. I texted him a little in the beginning, but nothing now. He has been staying away, which is fine with me, I know he's missing me. He comes to my fb wall a lot and leaves his like and love on my posts. I am not offering a friend zone either. The ball is in his court now!
She broke up with me 38 days ago, l'm in NC for 35 days. It was 8 months perfect relationship without fighting and bs, just love & passion. l got lazy on my purpose and she lost attraction for me. She always watching my fb story posts, guess she's curious. Stay strong guy's, this shit is tough!
Stefan Tomasevic Stay strong man. Just broke up from an 8 year relationship and I was stupid enough to do the same... Stopped putting in any effort into the relationship and treated her like crap by neglecting her and not putting in any effort, so she lost attraction for me. I'm working towards bettering myself and getting her back, but I want to do that when I know I'm ready to give her the love and attention she so rightfully deserves. I want to be a better man for myself and her if she's willing to try again. I've been NC for about a week, but we broke up a month ago.
it works 87% of times guys :) 2nd time drops to 63 if you can leave them alone, and if the breakup wasnt serious, but things that could easily be worked with ;)
She texted me probably 12 hours after i went back into NC apologizing for being "harsh" when she told me to back off: " I know how much pain you are in. And even though you don't believe me, this is hard for me too. I do love you and you do mean a lot to me." 2 months now since the breakup. I know she loves me but it's obvious she's not IN love with me. But she gets pissed if I tell her that and tells me to stop saying it. She actually said "I'm not over you, its only been 2 months!" Yet she wont even consider getting back together because "we'll always have the same issues".
I had giving him a chance of friends zone! While in it he said not completely happy with that ex he picked up when he left me , I just listened. But now it’s been 2 wks since we spoke and he had texted and called once but I ve ignored it. I’m giving him the gift of missing my presence through texts /calls. No friend zone anymore hun sorry I made up my mind. Thanks to coach LEE I’m staying strong 💪 and trying to move forward and taking care of myself . I had him for 2 amazing years no fight no nothing lots of laughs and chemistry - went back to his ex of one year. Of course younger than me- but who cares about age when there is love? Well.. mine perhaps wasn’t love but lust and passion 😂
25 days No contact works for me and my ex reach out on me and apologising for the bad things she has done and asking forgive forgiveness but I’m being calm and not rushing up given my self enough time to reply her message like letting it be at least 3 or 4 hours to reply her and I never thought she will reach out because of how hard and angry she was at me when she break up with me
I had to give her her stimulus check at her job. But I called and told her coworker to come get it and she came out. Looked so sad and asked how I was (5 1/2 years) . I said I'm doing fine. She said ok I'll um...come get my stuff soon because it's not fair to you...." I said ok. Have a good day though. And left. She seemed like she wanted to say something but I kept moving. I texted her after(the only text I've sent) saying sorry I didn't mean to run into you, won't happen again. I just didn't know where you were staying so I couldn't mail it". I can not stop crying I love this girl to death. I felt it was space she needed but I can never tell :-( I want her back so bad
What if they cheat on you with an 18 yr old right after your child is born then get really violent and blame you for the relationship failing? I don't want him back, I just want him to know that he is missing out. 😢
WillowFox808. GET AWAY FROM HIM! He CHEATED on you when you bore his Child. That is not good! I would contact an Attorney ASAP, and have him removed from the home. Contact Social Services LEGAL. They are FREE and you will be taken care of. God Bless you, and the Baby..❤❤ BIG hug...I ⚘️⚘️❤️💙⚘️⚘️
This is so true- I did all this with my wife of 25 years, we have a 12 year old daughter. She had affair with someone at work and now wants to divorce for her AP. I did all these things coach Lee saying.. and did nothing. Even took family trips and vacations, nothing. She still fallen for the new, better guys that expresses he really loves her. I am not sure if too late to "give the break up" its so scary to say "fine whatever you want to decide" Im not sure what else to do to make her see what she has and not break our home for this affair. its so sad. i lost it all
Nah my friend move on when a women falls and sleep with another man especially at work. The relationship is over!! Never take a women back that gave her body and mind away to another man!! She cheated out of emotions!! I will highly recommend working on yourself and co parenting with your child’s mother.
Always ask if its ok to stop over or to see them. NVER in this day and age just pop up. All it takes is a call to the police and you will get charged with stalking or trespassing or something, Make sure you ask, get it on text message as proof incase she wants to fight. If she wants to yell, leave dont participate in it. Yelling will create a disturbance and people will call the police. Just dont show up where they are without consent. You will loose your rights! NO girl is worth that.
I broke up one month ago because of he cheated on me, even if I am the person who broke up with still bring me a lots of pain. We had great 3.5yrs relationship, no fighting no argument. He called me pretending nothing happened or text me to say he misses me a lot. But I don’t see any change substantially so I keep the no contact rule, trying to move on but painful.
I had an ex gf (or gf as we are talking again) that had a past relationship where her ex cheated. I hate to say it but once a cheater..always a cheater. Now if you can forgive and you think he will stay faithful, then talk over things with him. It all depends on if you can let that go and forgive. If not, then heal up as I have heard the pain of being cheated on..and it's a crushing hurdle to get over. I 🙏 you get healing and peace. You will eventually find a good and faithful man.
@@poedottaviano6924 Thank you, there is no question whether I am willing to forgive him, because he doesn't feel that he has done anything wrong, it has been more than two months, I think I have gradually improved, thank you for your warmth. Whether or not I'll meet that person, I'm sure I'll be fine on my own.
I have to stay strong. It's only been Day 1 of NC and I think I'm doing fine but there is a really dull ache in my whole torso, especially where my heart and stomach is. Before the breakup he already expressed to me his intentions, that he wants to let go, have a break, etc. He keeps switching it up, "we should go on a break" to "I really can't see a future" then "but maybe when we're a lot older" and it hurts. The day of.. he and I cried and he wishes that I don't hate him and told me he was hurting too and that this is the hardest thing, because he feels horrible for hurting me. He just kept on giving me signs that he might hold on, like he still cares, and wants me to stay as his best friend (I said, "But my intention is to be your girlfriend, and I can't have that."), and reminded me that though he is leaving me he still feels physical attraction to me - Note: Physical. That day I couldn't say "I love you." It just hurt too much. When he finally dropped me off and my things at my door, and said goodbye, he kept looking back. I put my things inside and as soon as he heard the door shut his head swung to look back, and was surprised to see me walking out to him, but I made no move. I said, "It's alright you can go, I'm just watching you leave." And he kept looking back. I said, "Don't forget to clean under the toaster!" And he smiled and waved. As he drove off, he stopped in the middle of the road, I see him in his car looking back at me and making sure I see him wave, and I waved too. Only then did he drive off, and now I don't know what he's going through and I got Generalised Anxiety Disorder so I'm challenging myself to get better. Like I said, it's only Day 1 and I still ache...
Updates: He contacted me by Day 4, just to check up on me and making sure my mental health was okay. I said I was (I was also using NC to journal my thoughts down and it really does help.) But when I asked him, he says he wasn't doing so good. Day 5: I contacted him again, but he felt off and was overtly "friendly" to me, but I can tell he's still hurt. Back to no contact. Day 8: He called me because he missed me and wanted to just catch up with me, so I offered to see him the next Saturday in person just to have a nice chat.
Updates: (dunno why I felt like telling yall my full story but if it helps someone else then great) We sort of stayed in contact, with me sometimes initiating but not always. And I don't always reply straightaway. The next few days he just went out partying with his best friend, and I had lots of anxiety attacks. But I stayed strong, and didn't try to ask about his whereabouts or what he's up to. Day 14: We finally met up again in person. There was a lot of subtle flirting and close physical contact, and there were times I felt he was looking at me when he thinks I don't notice. He invited me back to his house and we chilled, but then things kind of escalated. He said he just couldn't help himself. At the end of the day, he dropped me off at my house, and told me he felt bad because he doesn't want me to think he's screwing me over because that wasn't to signal me we're back together. I reassured him that I still have my dignity and I didn't take it as a signal. I just tried being casual about it and said he just needs to sit with his thoughts and figure out what he wants in his own time. I don't think he was a scumbag for it. I just told him to think of it as outside of our relationship: We are both very attractive to each other, have great chemistry and history, and we both had a great time together. He just nodded. I then thanked him for a good day and he said "Me too." And then I left.
I reached out to my ex after about a month and he immediately said he wanted to try again. All I said was how are things going and he said he was surprised I cared enough to check on him and he'd love to try again so I said we should take thing very slow.
So me and my ex already went through about 4 months of no contact last year. One day she texted me and asked me to hang out, from then on we jumped back into things over the summer. The whole time we were separated I was miserable and was having a hard time with my own career and life, when I got her back I was ecstatic at first but then I was still miserable with my own life. We started making progress but eventually I got comfortable again and made the same mistakes that originally messed up the relationship. We spent the weekend together at my family’s house and I was rude to her and lashed out to her because deep down I was unhappy with myself. She told me she was through after that. It has now been another 5 months since then, only this time I have a great new job and am truly happy again, I just miss the girl and want to show her that I am happy now and I have truly changed as a man. I have written her letters telling her how I messed up and how I was going to make things right in my own life... I know you say not to write them letters but we already did 4/5 months of no contact last year. I felt terrible for taking out my issues on her and needed to let her know I was sorry. She wrote me back some letters but insists she doesn’t want to get back together. She even told me she was starting to fall back in love with me and that I was her person over the summer. Me and this person have been in a relationship for nearly three years. I am doing so well now I question whether or not I really want her back. I really just want to show her that I have changed, I just don’t want to lose her for good. We both made each other very happy. I feel as if no contact can’t work twice? I want to sit down with her and be strong and show her that I have really changed this time around.
My ex could never fall in love with me. He said don't try and date him again but he'd be devastated to lose me. I just hope some of these make him miss me x already done mutual no contact for 2 weeks and texting is ok and meeting is great. Just want him to see me as more Bought your kit so tomorrow I'm getting started.
Coach Lee ur an amazing person.. The way u express the situations it seems like the entire movie is running in the flash back..you r 100% right and also the way ur thinking shows that how sensible, gentleman person u r .. God bless u...keep going...ur videos r really gems.. 👌👌👌
How can we do that if we dont see them. And nithing bad happened between. So how would they know ifvwe are different . Im doing n c fir i month already ty
Very true. My ex wife called the police in a preplanned twisted game and accused me of domestic violence with my 15 year old son over an arguement over an xbox. I never touched my son however this was her chance to trap me. One week later in court I lost my home my marriage and my 4 sons aged 15 14 12 10. I havent seen spoken or texted my sons in 238 days. I am virtually homeless if not for my brother. Its going to court for appeal. Bye Colin from Dublin Ireland.
@@incensepeppermint5221 fuck me, that's twisted. It takes an incredibly selfish person to rob their children of their right to spend time with their father. Even if you would have treated her like crap, it's not your children's fault and they shouldn't be the ones to pay the price. (I grew up with a permissive, single mother, and I can tell you it's quite bad. Especially young boys need a father-figure in their life. I turned 30 and I'm now tackling problems normal kids do in late high-school.) For their sake and yours, I truly hope your appeal will be/has been successful. IDK why courts are so in favour of letting these crazy bitches keep the kids to themselves, but it's not doing anyone any favours. May righteousness stand on your side; it takes strength do deal with evil women who you once loved (I assume) but they want to trample your life, no matter the cost. Having the whole feminist army behind their backs, while developing young humans are suffering from pandemic-level-of-increase in depression, ADHD, anxiety and low self-esteem. Good luck, I hope you will triumph in this dispute.
What about if your ex got into a relationship without telling me and we were still having sex till I figured out she was acting up and I checked her Facebook page and found out she was in a relationship with someone else and he is def a downgrade from me. Will this work In my case??
12 years together. We had live together 5 years and he was living on his own so during lockdown covid, he met someone online, she married but long story short, her husband lefther for someone else. So within 2 months, she moved in with him!!! After all this and having my heart stump broken etc we had no contact for months because he wanted it. Now after 6 months they are living together, I am loosing hope ... we were good together and I can't even explain how he just went on to do this and yes he acts like I never existed after all . How disappointing that people when theyhave someone good, they just throw you away. I invested my years with him, memories, love, commitment etc ... so now what Coach???..
I’m 11 months into NC (for my own health not because I want him back🤢) However, My friend was 5 years into no contact and met her now husband received several emails from her ex and he has tried to get her back even tho he knows she got married! exes come back!
NC day 8 I was about to send him a voice message stating that I needed help for something. I'm glad I didn't break NC. I will wait for him to reach out instead.
@@amyhintz471 after 5 months, I don't even want him back, I realized he was a narcissist and I deserve better, yes he did break no contact but the no contact has made me stronger.
It’s been 8 months of no contact and I feel like I may never hear from him again. I have no clue if he’s still with his rebound. Trying to move on but I still don’t really have interest in dating. At what point do you deem things hopeless?
Kat B you have to be willing to walk away and never look back. It’s hard be you must in this time strive to be your best version and work on yourself :) Let the universe bring what it may... Always think it is a blessing in disguise!
You have already deemed it hopeless. You are feeling the emotion of what it’s like to look in opposition to what you want. He is not only coming back but it is already done. But don’t reach out. Be happy
Kat b, me too we've been broke up for 5 months now together for 17yrs, I haven't heard from him but I am doing no contact, for 3 months now I will never contact again.and I know he's in a rebound I'm sure but I'm going to back away for good if he rely love me he will contact, this is to hard and lonely. I'm just gonna put it in God's hands cuz there is nothing u can do if he's with someone else.
My 14 yr relationship end 3 months ago she already had someone before she broke up and we have kids together… lately she’s been wanting to have intimacy with me. I gave in last night… but she says it means nothing…. She intends to stay in her current relationship… and she apologized for being selfish. I’m confused.
It has been 9 months since I've seen my ex. I've tried almost everything to get her back but no success. The longest I could not email or text her was 30 days. I really believe I've learned things from coach Lee but, I don't want to believe our relationship is over for good. Any advise ?
I cant Make them...I have to put it in their hands....they have to feel it again....i have to Allow it to be possible and let go....they then have to want it within themseleves
I just let her go and didn’t push back as per my friends advice. She hasn’t reached out and over two months have gone by. I feel like I should’ve fought for her more. Should the dumpee break no contact, or just leave it?
Hanzificatoon, if she dumped you, LET HER contact you. Don't call her. Give her more time to think, as you should also be thinking of what you want/need. If you dumped her, then I would definitely contact her.
😭😭i was on no contact but after 4 months he posted his new girlfriend. It brought me to my knees. I sent him a email saying how happy I was for him 😭i should have not done that. So today I start over. But its ok if this love was meant to be mine it will happen 💪
Coach lee is pure miracle for me..after 32days on NC she reached out and today we met and now please coach lee make some videos what to do after 1st date
She makes contact everyday even when I'm leaving her alone,to ask for something or to tell me she's happy now.....It doesn't really bother me because I never did anything to make her feel hurt.
I start applying no contact rule and now I'm moving on ... She sent me an email that I could call her anytime if I wish to do so but I did not call her as she wish so she blocked me damn it....
Thank you, coach lee... i need to do your advise.. I know it is very difficult but, its great move.. and best for me... We are married for 9 years, and 13 years together, we have 3 kids.. I hurrt her emotions.. We are not good this last 3 years.. Always fighting.. She told me to leave her, and dont want to ser me, and doesnt love me anymorre.. im planning to start no contact, i hope this can help me..
All of this stuff works if your ex does not have Narcissistic Personality Disorder. But my ex is enigma, for someone supposedly head over heels in love with me and wanted to marry me his feelings for me were gone within a couple of weeks and turned to hate because I dumped him due to how he was treating me and because I didn’t want a man I had to share with multiple other women he claimed were just friends yet he was attracted to a few of them but they had friendzoned him. I was hoping leaving him would finally get him to see I couldn’t tolerate it and if he loved me he would get rid of these other women because there were just like his other girlfriends I felt like I was dating a guy with 3 other girlfriends but he wasn’t hiding them. Instead of wanting to work on the relationship and recognizing that he wouldn’t be happy either if I had 3-4 single guys I was hanging out with whom I was also attracted to, he simply didn’t care about how I felt or what my needs were so he just got over me very quickly and went back to chasing women on Facebook. Someday maybe he will learn that no woman wants to share the man they love with other attractive single women, even if they’re just friends he was still texting and talking to them regularly about each other’s day and lives and in one case calling each other Babe and other names lovers refer to each other. He and these other women were just like boyfriend and girlfriends except he wasn’t with them very often and didn’t sleep with them. He still was their free handyman and they did favors for each other. I constantly was put in position to feel jealous and insecure. I know a Narcissist will never care about anyone else’s happiness but their own and any confrontation or request for things to change only results in them devaluing us and wanting to find a new source. It’s been almost a year of severe heartbreak and pain but I’m finally getting over him and ready to move on to someone who is better suited for me and would make a great loving spouse. Unfortunately he’s almost impossible to find!
She used the first excuse to block me on social media and on iMessages. I didn’t bother her, I didn’t stalk her. She was just waiting for an excuse. Even though I immediately stopped communicating after the block, she’ll never know that I’m in no contact. She thinks she’s controlling her communication with me. She’ll know if she gets a txt it’s not from me. It’s really shocking that after 2 years, she would do that. My absence and no contact certainty doesn’t lower my chances but because of the block, I guess she still feels that she’s in control and this doesn’t help me get my attraction back.
Hi coach greetings from England...I was dumped five weeks ago by my fiancee.She is a widow with two children aged 17 and 15 and we were together over 6 years and lived together.I took her children on as my own.I am absolutely heartbroken.I have tried everything to get back with her.She said she does not love me anymore and that she has been unhappy for a while and thinks we have no common interests for a future together.I have offered to change but is falling on deaf ears.What can I do to get her and her boys back?They are my family.
My ex suffers high anxiety and depression. We broke up about a month and a half ago, she dumped me via text after I found out she had cheated on me. When I confronted her about it she overdosed, she's all good now thankfully. However, she blamed me for it, and it ruined me. I went no contact on her and she came running back however she then became very hot and cold, one day she would miss me the next hate me. To this day she still hates me for what happened and I don't know how to get her back anymore. I still care and love her so much.
Harry Ward let her go. That’s a cocktail for a toxic relationship. Save your energy for someone that’s not a troubled person and mentally/emotionally stable.
Harry Ward I completely understand. It’s hard trust that I know your pain 100%. My ex had a lot of issues with her past and I finally realized I wasn’t the problem. It’s a blessing for you that she’s gone even though it may not feel like it. What if you had children with her and she overdosed and left you alone with a family? Move on and focus on being the best you you can. It’s the best thing for you and your TRUE future love. Stay strong brother
25 days No contact works for me and my ex reach out on me and apologising for the bad things she has done and asking forgive forgiveness but I’m being calm and not rushing up given my self enough time to reply her message like letting it be at least 3 or 4 hours to reply her and I never thought she will reach out because of how hard and angry she was at me when she break up with me
I've just been broken up with after 5 years with my ex girlfriend. We've had our ups and downs and have broken up in the past to work on ourselves but always got back together so much stronger! We have a daughter together and we lived together for 4 years. I have moved out of the house and she is dropping all of my stuff round within the next few days. The breakup came as a shock to me but I know why it happened. I wasn't working due to covid 19 and we have been with eachother everyday for the past year nearly. Unfortionatly I did a little bit of begging and pleading until we sat down and had a proper conversation. We've been broken up for a week and 2 days and yesterday she claimed that she was happier without me. She also said she can't see us getting back together because she has fallen out of love with me. I am really having a hard time because I honestly thought I was going to marry her. She's the kindest sweetest most beautiful person I have ever met! Part of me hopes that its just a case of us taking eachother for granted as we have spent so much time together the past year with no breathing room but she seems so sure that she's happier without me and that we should move on and focus on our own lives. If anyone has any advice I would really appreciate it 😪
@@Thboyz6214 Thank you, seriously this past week has been living hell and I just can't wait for it to all blow over. I already know she's not coming back, and I just need to come to terms with it. Hopefully I'll be able to find someone else I can be closer with in the future.
I'm on my second breakup but I don't think he's coming back this time. I know I've changed but he won't want to work on it again. I'm just trying to move on now
I am recently had a break up. We had a 3 weeks relationship but since the beginning i knew him he have a girlfriend who is still married to a Japanese husband. He broke up with me because he love his girlfriend rather than me ... it was very devastated and heartbroken for me coz i care this man... until now im still in the process of healing myself , i wish a no contact is a great way to back our romance.
We had a relationship for 6 weeks all fun and laughter, suddenly she lost feelings? And she begun the relationship? We dated for 6 weeks. We are now 8 weeks after the breakup, she only sent texts about a thing we had planned in future put obviously couldn’t pull through. 4 weeks no Snapchat’s anymore, and no single contact
I lost my best freind and soul mate 5 weeks ago and I'm still in so much pain and miss her bad we talk back and forth she times she reaches out and I reach out sumtimes I'm goin nuts and have no idea what to do anymore
Please, don't get me wrong, I do appreciate all of your encouragement but somehow I don't think he cares, if he was able to break up with me after eight years of being together, he is not going to miss me, that's what he wanted, right...
At first, that’s right. Watch this video called “Stages your ex must go through during no contact,” all the way through: m.ua-cam.com/video/eKN11fzMwa0/v-deo.html
What do I do if I was mean to her from time to time without realizing? She only opened her feelings and thoughts to me at the break up which sucks, I wish she talked to me before so I could listen to her and act accordingly
It works! The tipping point is when they start missing you. Giving them the break up was the clue.
can you tell us your story?
What happens with you?
This guy has jus given you a cheat code at life, you can take it or leave it.
MY EXXXXXXX IS BACK!!! No contact but still making contact when she made contact! Now taking its easy and building everything up ❤️❤️❤️
Gouki818 Really happy for you!
Update?
How long did you have no contact, Gouki818?
Really happy for you 💏💏💏💏 but be careful 💔
Happy for you Gouki818!
Coach Lee, whether or not my ex and I get back together, I truly thank you for your words! They're so inspirational and definitely needed right now!
I wish you the best Patrick! Stay strong and keep your head up!
Did u get back with her?
@@peacekay2728 nah im alright. Shes married
@@RealCoachLee sir...I'm really upset...he brokeup with me with alot of anger ,abusive language and block me from every where....
Sir I contact him through every possible sources but he didn't talk to me....sir what to do..I really love him...I'm goin into depression .....🥺
Something to keep in mind my beautiful people...that part of you that they awakened inside you still exists, and it’s ready to come back. Stay strong and either your ex, or someone else just as good or better will come to you 💜
Deranged Titan what do you mean?
So right
A man will change for the right woman. Only one.
I feel kinda blessed that i found this page recently after the break up. This is my gift for Christmas!!
What ended up happening? Did you ever speak to them again?
@@amyhintz471 No i did not ;)
@@tsedekidisv3304 thank you. I hope you are much happier now!
No contact works people trust the process! It resets their brain to the emotional state of missing you! They will reach out to you in tears!
My ex broke up with me around 3 weeks ago... started no contact 2 weeks ago. Coach lees videos keep me going and being strong. Also working on myself. Fingers crossed she comes back🤞🏻 thanks coach lee.
Update?
Update?
Update she fucked like 10 guys and came back
Its been 5 years. Tell us what happened.
Watching this in tears, thank you for being heaven sent and helping me stay strong in no contact. I did no contact for a month before and no going back to it (three months after the breakup). So grateful for your help.
Do you think it's too late to be in no contact again with the hope to reconcile?
The odds do go down but all hope is not lost. I have seen exes come back after that amount of time.
@@RealCoachLee I believe for my situation it’s commitment- I was just told the advice to trying and take things presently with them (but they have already asked for space and to work on themselves alone) should I remain in NC?
Yes, absolutely.
@@RealCoachLee also one month after the breakup I broke it to tell him I was talking to someone new- and he wanted to work things out (and then changed his mind) so it kind of restarted the breakup for me a month and a half ago (is that common for the dumper to try and come back and change their mind)
He broke up with me in almost 10 months ago. I've started NC in the beginning of July. It was hard, but now I feel a lot better. I've been listening to your advices and I have to say that you've helped me. Thank you
During those 10 months he never reached out?
Sylwia S I have girl chats here is my cell 412-893-6451 I have a girl group chat girl power
@@AlexandraRuizMartinez30 He did. Before I decided to go NC. I also met him 3 months ago when I was at the party with mutual friends. He came to us and said "hello". I replied to him but later kept staying in NC.
@@sylwiaes9975did he eventually try to get back together during NC?
Yesterday I was fine, today feels like it just happened a few moments ago. Anyways I'll stay strong and not contact them.
My fellow King.. stay strong bro we'll be happy someday with or without them I was with mine for almost 6 years going on almost 3 months NC
@@paulbrandt3292 Thankyou. I watched these videos followed what was being said and i successfully got her back. Thanks though
@@RoyOkola how long was the nc?
My fiance that I had a 10-year relationship with, recently broke up with me. I had started watching Coach Lee's videos and started the No Contact Rule (minding on my business, keeping up with life and giving up hope of us ever getting back together (Hope will turn against you when you have a broken heart)) really uplifts my confidence. Thanks and more power on your channel!
Did she ever try coming back? After how long? How are you doing now?
Got dumped, just agree'd with her terms and wished her all the best. Not going to plead/beg for someone who is unworthy, No contact here I come baby lets do this, fuck it
I didn't get to finish that. But after 8 months and listening to you through some really hard times, it brought a lot of understanding, patience and finally figuring out what it is that I do want in my life. Thank you so much for all of your encouragement and I'm very happy to say that after 8 months me and my ex are back together and stronger than ever hopefully it will always stay this way but I did want to tell you thank you Kathy
Yes Kathy!!!
did your ex have a rebound relationship?
Can you tell us your journey back to him?
Fantastic to hear! Good luck!
Are you still together?
He is the man listen to every single word he is saying. I watched many of his videos and it helped me not only get my ex back but also gain self confidence.Yet we are not back together but she texted me asking about me and much more.So stick to No contact don't bother them by calling and texting
Thanks Lee, I've been watching almost all your videos since my breakup. It was a year and 3month relationship, after 2 weeks and 3 days of no contact he called today, I missed the call though so I was confused what to do but I watched your video that said we should not ignore so I sent him a message that I'm sorry I missed his call, he replied that he just wanted to check how I'm doing and he'll call me back once he's free. I'm so super excited, I never thought he'll text me or call like ever bcos of how it ended and he ended it with he wish me well in life and that was a sign he won't reach me. Thank you, you're an angel. I couldn't believe I'll be able to stay without reaching out to him, I did what you said to do during breakup and got myself busy
OJIATA VICTORIA did you guy get back together?
Oh yes, we started talking and he told me how much he missed me and want us to be together, he said he's vulnerable with me, we belong to each other... All those crazy talks and when he calls we talk for hours. He's doing all the things I did to try to keep him but I realized the more he try the more I don't want him anymore. I find it hard to love the same guy as crazy as I did when I cry for him not to leave and he eventually left and came back. I thought this would be different cos I've never experienced it the way I did but gradually my love is fading
@@ojiatavictoria4881 hey its been a while but I found your comment and would like to hear what happened ....because I feel the same would happen to me...right now my brain wants what it can't have but if he starts chasing me again I really don't know how I would want him again as it has affected my attraction too.
@@natalijaseme8725 We're still together. It turns out he wants to work the relationship with me. You can't keep a man unless he wants to stay and he'll do everything possible to make it work, if you really love him you'll have to be patient but don't chase him. He calls me everyday and he still loves talking to me for hours.
@@ojiatavictoria4881 thats lovely to read
I hope it all continues good
I can speak for most ppl when I say we DO NOT feel like they miss us. If anything it feels like they're getting over it since we're completely x out of their lives.
I certainly understand that you feel that way. Most people do because we assume that if they miss us that they would contact us and that since we don't know what is going on with them that they are living a great life without us - and they could be for a time, certainly in the relief stage. Trust me when I tell you that 20 years in the relationship-coaching industry has taught me that even if someone breaks up with you, they still often miss you. No contact is not a slam dunk, fool-proof thing, but it does work very often. I do, however, understand that because it feels like you are doing nothing, that it feels like nothing is happening. I suggest watching this video on the stages your ex (usually) goes through during no contact at ua-cam.com/video/wYEAWNvtaTk/v-deo.html
you are the most empathetic and helpful coach out there thanks for the advices
From being a dumpee now I’m the dumper. And he’s chasing me now. The truth that he has full of pride. No contact rule is very powerful. I blocked him and now i moved on after a month of break up. Thank’s God and thank you coach Lee.❤
You are a brilliant man Lee. I have watched 500 hours almost of videos on UA-cam for ex help. You are beyond the most brilliant. Your metaphors. Similarities. The cat was great. I couldn’t help but laugh at how grand your runner and chaser example were. I laughed and smiled at how I’ve never thought of it like that. Whether you created these or not is irrelevant. They hit my core. You are all I listen to now. You meet my expectations entirely. If I wait long enough. Any of yours videos solve my daily problems. You are truly a master of your craft. Thank you kindly.
25 days No contact works for me and my ex reach out on me and apologising for the bad things she has done and asking forgive forgiveness but I’m being calm and not rushing up given my self enough time to reply her message like letting it be at least 3 or 4 hours to reply her and I never thought she will reach out because of how hard and angry she was at me when she break up with me
Thank you for this!
I appreciate your honest approach and pull no punches attitude.
I am that begged , pleaded cryer, gifter .. I have her on no contact for about a month .. it’s been 4 months total. Our friends are saying she lights up when she speaks of me , that she loves me but still no contact from her and after sending her 2 morning love poems she blocked me ... I’m moving on and will keep the door open for her. Not looking for a rebound or another woman .. what comes is what comes .. I am a stronger man then the man she asked to leave .. I believe in my heart it was the circumstance and not loss of love that has us separated right now .. no drugs no alcohol no violence .. just lots of stress in her life including me being needy .. thanks Coach !!!
I appreciate you!!!
I never used to believe in psychology, I am happy today to not just believe it, but love it as well. Thank you Coach Lee, even if she doesn't want me back, I am comforted with your words man. I appreciate you!
I’ve commented on several of your videos coach Lee . I’m in no contact unless he reaches out and I’ve replied accordingly . I’m always pleasant & cordial . I hope to God I have a success story to tell you and Coach Ken who I have a session with next week. It can’t come fast enough . With love and respect 💙🙏
I do not have enough words to thank all that I am learning with you Coach Lee, Thank you very much for putting so much effort into making this channel as educational as it is productive. Thank you :)
5 months into NC, and still going.
4 months
@J J Sounds great! But my story is a bit complicated and at this point I'm not sure as to what I want. I believe I am willing to give it another try but only under the right circumstances.
@J J ultimately, I feel if you think its worth giving it another shot then you should. But I also feel that you should give it time before you make a decision as to what you really want to do. For me it's been 3 months and I'm just starting to begin to have a little more clarity as to the road I'm open to exploring.
@J J Thanks for the insight. To be honest I'm not sure what will happen. I'm just focusing on myself and if the opportunity presents itself I'll deal with it then, but as for now I'm moving on.
Almost 7 months for me. After 8 years together. At this point, I don't even know if I could let someone back in my life who caused me so much pain and grief for so long...
I’ve been with my gf for 5.5 years. We have had our ups and downs but grew emotionally and spiritually. Last Nov. she wanted NC so she could “ focus on herself” as a codependent. I didn’t understand NC or know there was such a thing. I would send her a text or email , not knowing if I was blocked or whatever. I was in the hospital for 3 days. She reached out with a beautiful card and a necklace that said “ new beginnings”. Mixed messsge. Since that I went NC. It’s been 42 days. She was the love of my life. Not giving up yet but will maintain NC. ❤️
25 days No contact works for me and my ex reach out on me and apologising for the bad things she has done and asking forgive forgiveness but I’m being calm and not rushing up given my self enough time to reply her message like letting it be at least 3 or 4 hours to reply her and I never thought she will reach out because of how hard and angry she was at me when she break up with me
Did she try coming back? After how long? How are you doing now?
I've watched all your videos like a 100 times in the last month. I start playing every time I feel anxious. Hopefully will have a success story at the end of this. The break up made me change who I am completely, I gave up my bad habits, got healthier, and have read books on attachment styles, love languages etc. If she ever comes back I will make her the happiest woman alive.
13 Hours after I made this comment my ex reached out, she said she missed me and she loved me we were on the phone for hours and we're pretty much back together. Hope this give people hope. But remember, you HAVE to have changed, and made positive changes in your life in the time you were separated, I did and she could see it. If you haven't changed they won't come back to you, and even if they do you will lose them again. Now that I have her back I will work even harder to become a better person, so if you have the attitude where you think ok I got them back now I can relax, you wont keep them. So just take the time to improve yourself, don't be too eager when they reach out, show them that you've changed and give them the space to miss you. Good luck.
Update: My Ex did return, only to ruin my life, because she's a borderline. She left again but this time I want her to stay away. If your ex is borderline etc my suggestion is stop watching these videos and move on. Change your number, and if she reaches out ignore her or tell her you're with someone else.
@@zeMasterRuseman my ex is a diagnosed BPD. What happened bro?
Honestly dude I’m a highly analytical type person and I really needed to hear some of the specific things you said in this video. Honestly my encouragement went up ten times after watching this. Thank you 🤘
You have been a voice I needed during this time,26yr relationship marriage,together since we were teens,this has been the hardest thing ive ever been faced with in my entire life.. i love my wife with everything
Omg. My heart breaks for you man. How are doing now? Did she ever try coming back? After how long?
Coach Lee, please create a communication on breakups for purely rational, logical reasons like situational problems or things you or the other person won't change. Thank you for soothing my aching heart❣️
The relief period can last forever. Its been 10 months since he broke up with me. I keep going through stages of deep depression. We have a 4 year old. Every time I see my ex to take our child he is bouncing off the walls with happiness. His life has improved infinitely. This doesn't work. And I will always be heartbroken.
No, you wont.... Life will suprise you. If he moved on, so should you. Find someone who will love you, you deserve it...
I agree... Nobody comes back....but we just grow stronger and better....I feel u
They already gave you the answer.
STAY STRONG!
Don't feel bad because it could be a show I can almost guarantee that he misses you
My sweetheart broke up with me after a 1.5 year. It has been painful, but I've done what you mentioned here, no contact. I texted him a little in the beginning, but nothing now. He has been staying away, which is fine with me, I know he's missing me. He comes to my fb wall a lot and leaves his like and love on my posts. I am not offering a friend zone either. The ball is in his court now!
She broke up with me 38 days ago, l'm in NC for 35 days.
It was 8 months perfect relationship without fighting and bs, just love & passion.
l got lazy on my purpose and she lost attraction for me.
She always watching my fb story posts, guess she's curious. Stay strong guy's, this shit is tough!
Stefan Tomasevic Stay strong man. Just broke up from an 8 year relationship and I was stupid enough to do the same... Stopped putting in any effort into the relationship and treated her like crap by neglecting her and not putting in any effort, so she lost attraction for me. I'm working towards bettering myself and getting her back, but I want to do that when I know I'm ready to give her the love and attention she so rightfully deserves. I want to be a better man for myself and her if she's willing to try again. I've been NC for about a week, but we broke up a month ago.
girl loooooool nice name
@_ BUDDHA _ did something else happen?
Any updates Stefan?
it works 87% of times guys :) 2nd time drops to 63 if you can leave them alone, and if the breakup wasnt serious, but things that could easily be worked with ;)
Where did you gets these statistics? Thank you.
3 years no contact. Tables turning. You are the prize. Hang in there. Coach lee rocks. #Long game
That's a long time of No contact.
Have you moved on yet? Or you still love this woman?
Holy moly move on
3 years? 😳
Lol they ain’t coming back sorry dude
She texted me probably 12 hours after i went back into NC apologizing for being "harsh" when she told me to back off: " I know how much pain you are in. And even though you don't believe me, this is hard for me too. I do love you and you do mean a lot to me." 2 months now since the breakup. I know she loves me but it's obvious she's not IN love with me. But she gets pissed if I tell her that and tells me to stop saying it. She actually said "I'm not over you, its only been 2 months!" Yet she wont even consider getting back together because "we'll always have the same issues".
I had giving him a chance of friends zone! While in it he said not completely happy with that ex he picked up when he left me , I just listened. But now it’s been 2 wks since we spoke and he had texted and called once but I ve ignored it. I’m giving him the gift of missing my presence through texts /calls. No friend zone anymore hun sorry I made up my mind. Thanks to coach LEE I’m staying strong 💪 and trying to move forward and taking care of myself . I had him for 2 amazing years no fight no nothing lots of laughs and chemistry - went back to his ex of one year. Of course younger than me- but who cares about age when there is love? Well.. mine perhaps wasn’t love but lust and passion 😂
This is the best break up video I have ever seen
Coach Lee just wanted to tell you that listening to your videos brought a lot of Courage and understanding
25 days No contact works for me and my ex reach out on me and apologising for the bad things she has done and asking forgive forgiveness but I’m being calm and not rushing up given my self enough time to reply her message like letting it be at least 3 or 4 hours to reply her and I never thought she will reach out because of how hard and angry she was at me when she break up with me
Coach Lee you are absolutely the best at your craft. We love you bruh.
I had to give her her stimulus check at her job. But I called and told her coworker to come get it and she came out. Looked so sad and asked how I was (5 1/2 years) . I said I'm doing fine. She said ok I'll um...come get my stuff soon because it's not fair to you...." I said ok. Have a good day though. And left. She seemed like she wanted to say something but I kept moving. I texted her after(the only text I've sent) saying sorry I didn't mean to run into you, won't happen again. I just didn't know where you were staying so I couldn't mail it". I can not stop crying
I love this girl to death. I felt it was space she needed but I can never tell :-( I want her back so bad
This is a GREAT video! Let them have the break up!!!!!!!Its what they wanted and this train’s pulling out ;)
What if they cheat on you with an 18 yr old right after your child is born then get really violent and blame you for the relationship failing? I don't want him back, I just want him to know that he is missing out. 😢
WillowFox808. GET AWAY FROM HIM! He CHEATED on you when you bore his Child. That is not good! I would contact an Attorney ASAP, and have him removed from the home. Contact Social Services LEGAL. They are FREE and you will be taken care of. God Bless you, and the Baby..❤❤ BIG hug...I ⚘️⚘️❤️💙⚘️⚘️
Thanks!
Can we get 10 hour intro song... This will make me sleep really well!
This is so true- I did all this with my wife of 25 years, we have a 12 year old daughter. She had affair with someone at work and now wants to divorce for her AP. I did all these things coach Lee saying.. and did nothing. Even took family trips and vacations, nothing. She still fallen for the new, better guys that expresses he really loves her. I am not sure if too late to "give the break up" its so scary to say "fine whatever you want to decide"
Im not sure what else to do to make her see what she has and not break our home for this affair. its so sad. i lost it all
How are you doing now? Did she ever try coming back? After how long? Sorry this happened to you.
Nah my friend move on when a women falls and sleep with another man especially at work. The relationship is over!! Never take a women back that gave her body and mind away to another man!! She cheated out of emotions!! I will highly recommend working on yourself and co parenting with your child’s mother.
Always ask if its ok to stop over or to see them. NVER in this day and age just pop up. All it takes is a call to the police and you will get charged with stalking or trespassing or something, Make sure you ask, get it on text message as proof incase she wants to fight. If she wants to yell, leave dont participate in it. Yelling will create a disturbance and people will call the police. Just dont show up where they are without consent. You will loose your rights! NO girl is worth that.
I broke up one month ago because of he cheated on me, even if I am the person who broke up with still bring me a lots of pain. We had great 3.5yrs relationship, no fighting no argument. He called me pretending nothing happened or text me to say he misses me a lot. But I don’t see any change substantially so I keep the no contact rule, trying to move on but painful.
I had an ex gf (or gf as we are talking again) that had a past relationship where her ex cheated. I hate to say it but once a cheater..always a cheater. Now if you can forgive and you think he will stay faithful, then talk over things with him.
It all depends on if you can let that go and forgive.
If not, then heal up as I have heard the pain of being cheated on..and it's a crushing hurdle to get over.
I 🙏 you get healing and peace. You will eventually find a good and faithful man.
@@poedottaviano6924 Thank you, there is no question whether I am willing to forgive him, because he doesn't feel that he has done anything wrong, it has been more than two months, I think I have gradually improved, thank you for your warmth. Whether or not I'll meet that person, I'm sure I'll be fine on my own.
@minjia zheng if a person cheats and thinks they DID NOTHING WRONG cannot be trusted again!
This is beautiful, my brother! Thank you for making me feel better during this ugly period of my life...thank you so much!!
I have to stay strong. It's only been Day 1 of NC and I think I'm doing fine but there is a really dull ache in my whole torso, especially where my heart and stomach is. Before the breakup he already expressed to me his intentions, that he wants to let go, have a break, etc. He keeps switching it up, "we should go on a break" to "I really can't see a future" then "but maybe when we're a lot older" and it hurts. The day of.. he and I cried and he wishes that I don't hate him and told me he was hurting too and that this is the hardest thing, because he feels horrible for hurting me. He just kept on giving me signs that he might hold on, like he still cares, and wants me to stay as his best friend (I said, "But my intention is to be your girlfriend, and I can't have that."), and reminded me that though he is leaving me he still feels physical attraction to me - Note: Physical.
That day I couldn't say "I love you." It just hurt too much. When he finally dropped me off and my things at my door, and said goodbye, he kept looking back. I put my things inside and as soon as he heard the door shut his head swung to look back, and was surprised to see me walking out to him, but I made no move. I said, "It's alright you can go, I'm just watching you leave." And he kept looking back. I said, "Don't forget to clean under the toaster!" And he smiled and waved. As he drove off, he stopped in the middle of the road, I see him in his car looking back at me and making sure I see him wave, and I waved too.
Only then did he drive off, and now I don't know what he's going through and I got Generalised Anxiety Disorder so I'm challenging myself to get better. Like I said, it's only Day 1 and I still ache...
Updates:
He contacted me by Day 4, just to check up on me and making sure my mental health was okay. I said I was (I was also using NC to journal my thoughts down and it really does help.) But when I asked him, he says he wasn't doing so good.
Day 5: I contacted him again, but he felt off and was overtly "friendly" to me, but I can tell he's still hurt. Back to no contact.
Day 8: He called me because he missed me and wanted to just catch up with me, so I offered to see him the next Saturday in person just to have a nice chat.
Updates: (dunno why I felt like telling yall my full story but if it helps someone else then great)
We sort of stayed in contact, with me sometimes initiating but not always. And I don't always reply straightaway. The next few days he just went out partying with his best friend, and I had lots of anxiety attacks. But I stayed strong, and didn't try to ask about his whereabouts or what he's up to.
Day 14: We finally met up again in person. There was a lot of subtle flirting and close physical contact, and there were times I felt he was looking at me when he thinks I don't notice. He invited me back to his house and we chilled, but then things kind of escalated. He said he just couldn't help himself. At the end of the day, he dropped me off at my house, and told me he felt bad because he doesn't want me to think he's screwing me over because that wasn't to signal me we're back together.
I reassured him that I still have my dignity and I didn't take it as a signal. I just tried being casual about it and said he just needs to sit with his thoughts and figure out what he wants in his own time. I don't think he was a scumbag for it. I just told him to think of it as outside of our relationship: We are both very attractive to each other, have great chemistry and history, and we both had a great time together. He just nodded. I then thanked him for a good day and he said "Me too." And then I left.
I reached out to my ex after about a month and he immediately said he wanted to try again. All I said was how are things going and he said he was surprised I cared enough to check on him and he'd love to try again so I said we should take thing very slow.
How did things go?
Update?
What was the reason for the breakup? How long were you two together?
So me and my ex already went through about 4 months of no contact last year. One day she texted me and asked me to hang out, from then on we jumped back into things over the summer. The whole time we were separated I was miserable and was having a hard time with my own career and life, when I got her back I was ecstatic at first but then I was still miserable with my own life. We started making progress but eventually I got comfortable again and made the same mistakes that originally messed up the relationship. We spent the weekend together at my family’s house and I was rude to her and lashed out to her because deep down I was unhappy with myself. She told me she was through after that. It has now been another 5 months since then, only this time I have a great new job and am truly happy again, I just miss the girl and want to show her that I am happy now and I have truly changed as a man. I have written her letters telling her how I messed up and how I was going to make things right in my own life... I know you say not to write them letters but we already did 4/5 months of no contact last year. I felt terrible for taking out my issues on her and needed to let her know I was sorry. She wrote me back some letters but insists she doesn’t want to get back together. She even told me she was starting to fall back in love with me and that I was her person over the summer. Me and this person have been in a relationship for nearly three years. I am doing so well now I question whether or not I really want her back. I really just want to show her that I have changed, I just don’t want to lose her for good. We both made each other very happy. I feel as if no contact can’t work twice? I want to sit down with her and be strong and show her that I have really changed this time around.
My ex could never fall in love with me. He said don't try and date him again but he'd be devastated to lose me. I just hope some of these make him miss me x already done mutual no contact for 2 weeks and texting is ok and meeting is great. Just want him to see me as more
Bought your kit so tomorrow I'm getting started.
Coach Lee...I like be to hear you..your calm voice encourage me that I'm doing the right things. Thank you so much
Coach Lee ur an amazing person.. The way u express the situations it seems like the entire movie is running in the flash back..you r 100% right and also the way ur thinking shows that how sensible, gentleman person u r .. God bless u...keep going...ur videos r really gems.. 👌👌👌
How can we do that if we dont see them. And nithing bad happened between. So how would they know ifvwe are different . Im doing n c fir i month already ty
It don't work if your ex is emotionally unavailable
Thats why you need to leave them alone
Very true. My ex wife called the police in a preplanned twisted game and accused me of domestic violence with my 15 year old son over an arguement over an xbox. I never touched my son however this was her chance to trap me. One week later in court I lost my home my marriage and my 4 sons aged 15 14 12 10. I havent seen spoken or texted my sons in 238 days. I am virtually homeless if not for my brother. Its going to court for appeal. Bye Colin from Dublin Ireland.
@@incensepeppermint5221 read up about mgtow there is a lot of us who have been through this
@@incensepeppermint5221 fuck me, that's twisted. It takes an incredibly selfish person to rob their children of their right to spend time with their father. Even if you would have treated her like crap, it's not your children's fault and they shouldn't be the ones to pay the price. (I grew up with a permissive, single mother, and I can tell you it's quite bad. Especially young boys need a father-figure in their life. I turned 30 and I'm now tackling problems normal kids do in late high-school.)
For their sake and yours, I truly hope your appeal will be/has been successful. IDK why courts are so in favour of letting these crazy bitches keep the kids to themselves, but it's not doing anyone any favours.
May righteousness stand on your side; it takes strength do deal with evil women who you once loved (I assume) but they want to trample your life, no matter the cost. Having the whole feminist army behind their backs, while developing young humans are suffering from pandemic-level-of-increase in depression, ADHD, anxiety and low self-esteem.
Good luck, I hope you will triumph in this dispute.
What about if your ex got into a relationship without telling me and we were still having sex till I figured out she was acting up and I checked her Facebook page and found out she was in a relationship with someone else and he is def a downgrade from me. Will this work In my case??
getting my 13 min Coach Lee fix today hehe, on day 21 NC too ;)
12 years together. We had live together 5 years and he was living on his own so during lockdown covid, he met someone online, she married but long story short, her husband lefther for someone else. So within 2 months, she moved in with him!!! After all this and having my heart stump broken etc we had no contact for months because he wanted it. Now after 6 months they are living together, I am loosing hope ... we were good together and I can't even explain how he just went on to do this and yes he acts like I never existed after all . How disappointing that people when theyhave someone good, they just throw you away. I invested my years with him, memories, love, commitment etc ... so now what Coach???..
What’s meant for u nothing can be taken from me
This is interesting stuff it can help others
I’m 11 months into NC (for my own health not because I want him back🤢) However,
My friend was 5 years into no contact and met her now husband received several emails from her ex and he has tried to get her back even tho he knows she got married! exes come back!
NC day 8 I was about to send him a voice message stating that I needed help for something. I'm glad I didn't break NC. I will wait for him to reach out instead.
Did he?
@@amyhintz471 after 5 months, I don't even want him back, I realized he was a narcissist and I deserve better, yes he did break no contact but the no contact has made me stronger.
@@nehamayuri9417 oh wow though, he actually DID reach out to you after you went no contact?! That's amazing. I feel like mine never will.
It’s been 8 months of no contact and I feel like I may never hear from him again. I have no clue if he’s still with his rebound. Trying to move on but I still don’t really have interest in dating. At what point do you deem things hopeless?
Kat B you have to be willing to walk away and never look back. It’s hard be you must in this time strive to be your best version and work on yourself :) Let the universe bring what it may... Always think it is a blessing in disguise!
You have already deemed it hopeless. You are feeling the emotion of what it’s like to look in opposition to what you want. He is not only coming back but it is already done. But don’t reach out. Be happy
Kat b, me too we've been broke up for 5 months now together for 17yrs, I haven't heard from him but I am doing no contact, for 3 months now I will never contact again.and I know he's in a rebound I'm sure but I'm going to back away for good if he rely love me he will contact, this is to hard and lonely. I'm just gonna put it in God's hands cuz there is nothing u can do if he's with someone else.
same with me, but I suspect my ex is a narcissist
Just moved on
U r so impeccably logical and articulate. Also, handsome.
You and corey wayne are amazing, thankyou so much
My 14 yr relationship end 3 months ago she already had someone before she broke up and we have kids together… lately she’s been wanting to have intimacy with me. I gave in last night… but she says it means nothing…. She intends to stay in her current relationship… and she apologized for being selfish. I’m confused.
You are so wonder ful my dear coach Lee. I need this advise
It has been 9 months since I've seen my ex. I've tried almost everything to get her back but no success. The longest I could not email or text her was 30 days. I really believe I've learned things from coach Lee but, I don't want to believe our relationship is over for good. Any advise ?
How are you getting on now Jeff?
@@jacqui8392 Not good. I can't get my mind off her. When you had something as good as we had , how can you walk away from that.
@@jeffboggs1528 I suggest you get Coach Lee's Emergency Breakup Kit which will help you.
myexbackcoach.com/ebk
I cant Make them...I have to put it in their hands....they have to feel it again....i have to Allow it to be possible and let go....they then have to want it within themseleves
I just let her go and didn’t push back as per my friends advice. She hasn’t reached out and over two months have gone by. I feel like I should’ve fought for her more. Should the dumpee break no contact, or just leave it?
Hanzificatoon, if she dumped you, LET HER contact you. Don't call her. Give her more time to think, as you should also be thinking of what you want/need. If you dumped her, then I would definitely contact her.
😭😭i was on no contact but after 4 months he posted his new girlfriend. It brought me to my knees. I sent him a email saying how happy I was for him 😭i should have not done that. So today I start over. But its ok if this love was meant to be mine it will happen 💪
Been married 11 years and now we are seperated...I sure hope my wife misses me... we didn't have the strongest marriage
Layne, what happened? Why are you two separated?
Coach lee is pure miracle for me..after 32days on NC she reached out and today we met and now please coach lee make some videos what to do after 1st date
Any update?
@@mletlet03 now she's just contacting me everyday 😁listen to coach lee
How's it going now?
@@TeKNiQ50 we're married now ♥️♥️♥️
@@asadgiku congrats bro!
She makes contact everyday even when I'm leaving her alone,to ask for something or to tell me she's happy now.....It doesn't really bother me because I never did anything to make her feel hurt.
@@Anna-lc2uf when I do msg her she's very angry at me...because Of the argument we had,even tho I've said sorry a million times
Help! I have purchased the emergency kit how do I get back to it? Thank you!
I start applying no contact rule and now I'm moving on ... She sent me an email that I could call her anytime if I wish to do so but I did not call her as she wish so she blocked me damn it....
Thank you, coach lee... i need to do your advise.. I know it is very difficult but, its great move.. and best for me... We are married for 9 years, and 13 years together, we have 3 kids.. I hurrt her emotions.. We are not good this last 3 years.. Always fighting.. She told me to leave her, and dont want to ser me, and doesnt love me anymorre.. im planning to start no contact, i hope this can help me..
All of this stuff works if your ex does not have Narcissistic Personality Disorder. But my ex is enigma, for someone supposedly head over heels in love with me and wanted to marry me his feelings for me were gone within a couple of weeks and turned to hate because I dumped him due to how he was treating me and because I didn’t want a man I had to share with multiple other women he claimed were just friends yet he was attracted to a few of them but they had friendzoned him. I was hoping leaving him would finally get him to see I couldn’t tolerate it and if he loved me he would get rid of these other women because there were just like his other girlfriends I felt like I was dating a guy with 3 other girlfriends but he wasn’t hiding them. Instead of wanting to work on the relationship and recognizing that he wouldn’t be happy either if I had 3-4 single guys I was hanging out with whom I was also attracted to, he simply didn’t care about how I felt or what my needs were so he just got over me very quickly and went back to chasing women on Facebook. Someday maybe he will learn that no woman wants to share the man they love with other attractive single women, even if they’re just friends he was still texting and talking to them regularly about each other’s day and lives and in one case calling each other Babe and other names lovers refer to each other. He and these other women were just like boyfriend and girlfriends except he wasn’t with them very often and didn’t sleep with them. He still was their free handyman and they did favors for each other. I constantly was put in position to feel jealous and insecure. I know a Narcissist will never care about anyone else’s happiness but their own and any confrontation or request for things to change only results in them devaluing us and wanting to find a new source. It’s been almost a year of severe heartbreak and pain but I’m finally getting over him and ready to move on to someone who is better suited for me and would make a great loving spouse. Unfortunately he’s almost impossible to find!
you did good, how are things now?
If I only heard it 3 years before...
She used the first excuse to block me on social media and on iMessages. I didn’t bother her, I didn’t stalk her. She was just waiting for an excuse. Even though I immediately stopped communicating after the block, she’ll never know that I’m in no contact.
She thinks she’s controlling her communication with me. She’ll know if she gets a txt it’s not from me. It’s really shocking that after 2 years, she would do that. My absence and no contact certainty doesn’t lower my chances but because of the block, I guess she still feels that she’s in control and this doesn’t help me get my attraction back.
I’m just depressed in this no contact time and I don’t want to get my hopes up to get crushed again
BLASTOISE BOI, Hang in there with No Contact. Everyone goes thru the same.
Hi coach greetings from England...I was dumped five weeks ago by my fiancee.She is a widow with two children aged 17 and 15 and we were together over 6 years and lived together.I took her children on as my own.I am absolutely heartbroken.I have tried everything to get back with her.She said she does not love me anymore and that she has been unhappy for a while and thinks we have no common interests for a future together.I have offered to change but is falling on deaf ears.What can I do to get her and her boys back?They are my family.
we ended in good terms a week ago but suddenly she removed me from her social media i am confused why
Nolan, it sounds like she broke all ties to you. I suggest Coach Lee's Emergency Breakup Kit which will help you.
myexbackcoach.com/ebk
Dude this is so spot on. Thank you.
You are the best coach Lee I get it clear every word you explain it. I feel good now
Coach what if he not opened text but has not blocked me or unfriend me. 2 calls 2 1/2 wjs after breakup then nothing for 4 weeks.
Day one 😭..hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.
Autumn A hang on there, you're not alone.
True. Day 1 is really the hardest.
Bumped into my ex on the school run, we greeted each other and went our separate ways.does this affect no contact, thank you.
I think so because you said hello to her. Next time whip out your phone and pretend to be talking to someone. Good Luck!
Nah, that's an accident. You were polite and mature not reaching out on purpose. Try not to do it again though.
As long as you dont bring up the past relationship and ask questions, it’s fine. Saying hi doesn’t count
Love you Coach Lee
My ex suffers high anxiety and depression. We broke up about a month and a half ago, she dumped me via text after I found out she had cheated on me. When I confronted her about it she overdosed, she's all good now thankfully. However, she blamed me for it, and it ruined me. I went no contact on her and she came running back however she then became very hot and cold, one day she would miss me the next hate me. To this day she still hates me for what happened and I don't know how to get her back anymore. I still care and love her so much.
Harry Ward let her go. That’s a cocktail for a toxic relationship. Save your energy for someone that’s not a troubled person and mentally/emotionally stable.
gvigilgem thank you, it feels like I'm just holding onto something now that I'll never get back.
Harry Ward I completely understand. It’s hard trust that I know your pain 100%. My ex had a lot of issues with her past and I finally realized I wasn’t the problem. It’s a blessing for you that she’s gone even though it may not feel like it. What if you had children with her and she overdosed and left you alone with a family? Move on and focus on being the best you you can. It’s the best thing for you and your TRUE future love. Stay strong brother
Harry Ward Susan Winter talks alot about hot and cold
Christopher cheers, I'll look into it.
25 days No contact works for me and my ex reach out on me and apologising for the bad things she has done and asking forgive forgiveness but I’m being calm and not rushing up given my self enough time to reply her message like letting it be at least 3 or 4 hours to reply her and I never thought she will reach out because of how hard and angry she was at me when she break up with me
I've just been broken up with after 5 years with my ex girlfriend. We've had our ups and downs and have broken up in the past to work on ourselves but always got back together so much stronger! We have a daughter together and we lived together for 4 years. I have moved out of the house and she is dropping all of my stuff round within the next few days. The breakup came as a shock to me but I know why it happened. I wasn't working due to covid 19 and we have been with eachother everyday for the past year nearly. Unfortionatly I did a little bit of begging and pleading until we sat down and had a proper conversation. We've been broken up for a week and 2 days and yesterday she claimed that she was happier without me. She also said she can't see us getting back together because she has fallen out of love with me. I am really having a hard time because I honestly thought I was going to marry her. She's the kindest sweetest most beautiful person I have ever met! Part of me hopes that its just a case of us taking eachother for granted as we have spent so much time together the past year with no breathing room but she seems so sure that she's happier without me and that we should move on and focus on our own lives. If anyone has any advice I would really appreciate it 😪
How did it work out in the end for you two? My ex just broke up with me and we've been together for five years.
@@Thboyz6214 Thank you, seriously this past week has been living hell and I just can't wait for it to all blow over. I already know she's not coming back, and I just need to come to terms with it. Hopefully I'll be able to find someone else I can be closer with in the future.
I'm on my second breakup but I don't think he's coming back this time. I know I've changed but he won't want to work on it again. I'm just trying to move on now
I am recently had a break up. We had a 3 weeks relationship but since the beginning i knew him he have a girlfriend who is still married to a Japanese husband. He broke up with me because he love his girlfriend rather than me ... it was very devastated and heartbroken for me coz i care this man... until now im still in the process of healing myself , i wish a no contact is a great way to back our romance.
We had a relationship for 6 weeks all fun and laughter, suddenly she lost feelings? And she begun the relationship? We dated for 6 weeks. We are now 8 weeks after the breakup, she only sent texts about a thing we had planned in future put obviously couldn’t pull through. 4 weeks no Snapchat’s anymore, and no single contact
Imeokparia Israel yeah
Did she come back
@@DC-bp8sx i have a new girlfriend already for 6 months haha, never spoke my ex again! Wished her 1 time a happy birthday. I never miss her
I lost my best freind and soul mate 5 weeks ago and I'm still in so much pain and miss her bad we talk back and forth she times she reaches out and I reach out sumtimes I'm goin nuts and have no idea what to do anymore
Ex broke up a week ago. Still no contact havent heard anything she broke it off. Dont expect her at all. Moving on for me, will see if she contacts me
Wow!!!! Coach Lee you get more handsome each day
It's like you never age !!! 💖
Please, don't get me wrong, I do appreciate all of your encouragement but somehow I don't think he cares, if he was able to break up with me after eight years of being together, he is not going to miss me, that's what he wanted, right...
At first, that’s right. Watch this video called “Stages your ex must go through during no contact,” all the way through: m.ua-cam.com/video/eKN11fzMwa0/v-deo.html
What do I do if I was mean to her from time to time without realizing? She only opened her feelings and thoughts to me at the break up which sucks, I wish she talked to me before so I could listen to her and act accordingly
Coach when r u taking calls?????