The most misleading are the trailers and movie posters. As Sean said, don't expect to see the 3 Spider-woman in their costumes. (Except for a few seconds.) I guess it's the Hollywood version of clickbait.
This is the review I was waiting for! With even Nerdstalgic saying it was bad(and he usually tries to find a silver lining), I was eager to hear Sean's take on this clusterf*ck of a movie. Well done, Smeg! And I would ABSOLUTELY be all in for a 2-hour CE about this "Movie." Do it.
Green Lantern is just a very clunky version of “Doc” Smith’s old Lensman books. (The Japanese Lensman stuff is very unfaithful to Smith’s lore and might as well be considered something different.)
That's actually the complete 1987 TMNT series set that was released by Lionsgate years back, essentially putting together all the DVD releases they did of the show together. A bit hard to find now, as they've released a different plastic case/no van set since then.
When Fant4stic came out, I was adamantly convinced that no movie based on a Marvel property could ever be worse than it. Well, I guess Sony just said "hold my beer" because this completely dethroned it for me. And I'll go a step further, this is probably one of the worst movies I've ever seen in my life in general in terms of editing, in terms of acting and just in terms of getting the basic concepts of telling a story right.
The thumbnail just sums it all up, really. The cast were great, but the execution was all over the place. Even Dakota Johnson was skeptical about the movie's quality during filming, when she had to react to fake explosions and blue and green screens.
Honestly, this is such a disappointment to hear. My first introduction to Madame Web was through the 1994 animated Spider-Man series and to hear and see how this movie treated her along with several Spider Women characters. It really just hurts, I hope Madame Web and the Spider Women get a better movie. Those characters deserve it!!
Hopefully the animated Spider-Gwen film does that, and I hope to see the REAL Madame Web in Beyond the Spider-Verse, especially since she hasn't appeared in the previous Spider-Verse films
Thank you SO much for countering that whole "superhero fatigue" nonsense. You are spot on in your assessment. Why do so many superhero films lately underperform... exactly as you noted: they're half-assed! Bad movies, regardless of genre, usually aren't going to fare so well at the box office. Go figure, right! Love that finally someone points out the BS in blaming the genre for the incompetence or laziness of the studios and filmmakers.
@@frankieseward8667That film's success was a complete fluke, it was no better than, Viva Rock Vegas, which totally flopped, despite, bringing back the original director, which never happens, simple as that.
@@frankieseward8667 The backstory alone would last two hours, not, to mention, that it would be next to impossible for any potential video to survive the inevitable copyright strike, simple as that.
"Can we please stop blaming the women? They are not the problem here." EXACTLY! I am so sick of hearing this implicit sexist backlash against comic book movies with female protagonists.
Or female-led movies, in general. Probably it's the rock I live under talking, but I haven't so far seen people blaming the female cast. Maybe they are, somewhere, but I'm more than happy to ignore them. Idiots like that are attention whores.
The problem is not that the movie is female lead, the problem is that the movie being female lead is the only thought that goes in the head of those making this movies, character development, story and continuity be damned
Oh, I see. I haven't watched (probably never will), but what I take from this is that the writers are some of those idiots who think "female" is a personality trait.
Sony reedited Madam web, also doing ADR and some reshoots, to remove as many references to Peter Parker and Spider-Man from the film as possible. Either a licensing thing with Disney or they knew this film would bomb, had to release it for contractual reasons and just shoved it out in a way to minimise damage to the Spider-man film franchise. Possibly Sony has to make a Spider-Man movie every couple of years to keep the film rights.
I was waiting for this review!! ❤ Honestly, the things I've been hearing about this movie are so unhinged that I think I'm going to go and watch it just for the chaos. 😈
@erichfiedler1481 this will no doubt be nominated, but I don't know if it will win. We have those 2 public domain Mickey Mouse horror films this year.
Having parents who were once headliners, (truly shocking, I know), is much better for her, how much longer until the clock finally strikes midnight, probably not very long, no doubt.
I wouldn't blame the writers, the writer of The Hangover 3 made Chernobyl, the writers of Problem Child wrote Ed Wood. The director also wrote this film.
Fun Fact: Prince Eric voiced Spider-Man in that series, it was the first time he'd get betrayed by the network in animated form, by, Executive Meddling, (unfortunately, not the last).
@@matthewdaley746 Yeah sure, because if there are two people in Hollywood who have enough stroke in 2024 to twist Sony Pictures' arm to give their daughter a leading role in an $80-million movie, it's... drum roll... _Don Johnson and Melanie Griffith._ One hasn't been a lead actor in anything that made money in decades, the other barely works at all anymore - and they're mostly known for being "problematic" and PIAs for people who have to do business with them. Whatever you're smoking, it's either way too much or not enough.
@@henrygvidonas9573You seem to know a lot about smoking certain substances, try taking some of your own advice, there's nothing that screams, "shameless," more than a performer using their own name, how else can you possibly explain the career of Bryce Dallas Hackard.
@@matthewdaley746 She's great in Bad Times at the El Royale. She's great in The Peanut Butter Falcon. I don't want to hold Fifty Shades against her for her entire career.
I will never understand why Sony is still trying to push their own live-action spider-verse when they already have a perfectly good Playstation brand and the Boys
You will most likely have to do a Cinematic Excrement episode on it after it wins Worst Picture at the 2025 Razzie Awards! So far, it's a early Worst Picture contender for next year's Razzies!
The bit about Ma Parker introducing herself to Uncle Ben as "your sister-in-law" reminds me of the infamous Folgers coffee "incest" advert: "I must have the wrong house!" "Sister!"
Spiderverse and the MCU Spider-Man movies are the only thing keeping the films rights with Sony. I was really lucky predicting the MCU/Sony deal and Fant4stic being the end of Fox’s hold on the team, but I’m doing it again. This is the start to when Sony loses control of their hold on whatever Marvel properties they have. Either they’re going to have to sell them back to Disney or they’re going to be bought out just like Fox was.
Thank you for addressing that at the beginning. Madame Web didn’t fail because of superhero movie fatigue nor because it started a woman. It failed because it sucked.
Apparently, the writers were willing to butcher the script for Dracula Untold to whatever producers wanted that they are known as willing to play ball with to studios, so they get hired when a studio needs studio notes turned into movies.... All those movies suck, and they never earn money, but apparently that's still a desirable trait...
Madame Web wishes us an early Halloween as the words of ISB supervisor Blevin ring out in all our minds "It took the combined ingredients of idiocy, ineptitude, and total disengagement for this farce to have reached the full apex of incredulous disaster." 8:54 Silk, Spider-Boy, Spider-Gwen, Anti-Venom (whether it be Eddie Brock or Flash Thompson), Mayday Parker/Spider-Girl (or any of Peter and MJ's other children in the comics), Ben Reilly, Kaine, Spider-Man Noir, Spider-UK, Spider-Punk, Spider-Ham, Peni Parker, Spider-Man J, Spider-Bitch, and Spider-Man 2099, all of these are films I'd much rather have than a Madame Web movie.
Cue Tina Turner. "Out of the ruins Out from the wreckage Can't make the same mistake this time We are the children The last generation (the last generation, generation) We are the ones they left behind And, I wonder when we are ever gonna change, change Living under the fear, 'til nothing else remains We don't need another Spider..."
You seriously think the people of Spiderverse wrote this hunk of crap? There’s always A and a B team to studio writers. The team that wrote this isn’t deserving of even being called a C team.
LOL!! Even with New Rockstars (who always--ALWAYS) find good things to say about lousy movies found it hard NOT to laugh at this film!! That's saying something!
This was something that I talked to my mother and another person on Threads about. As much as we enjoy laughing at Sony for tripping over their shoelaces with Morbius and now Madame Web, the truth of the matter is that there was a reason why Marvel Studios had to rein in on Sony's BS when it came time for Spider-Man to appear in the MCU. From what I'm hearing, Sony's now putting in all their eggs into the basket that is the Kraven the Hunter movie as a "go big or go home" thing on their current attempts for a Spider-Man universe without Spider-Man. The problem is that this is, what, the third time Sony is doing this- they've done this song and dance with Spider-Man 3 and The Amazing Spider-Man 2. At this point, Sony needs to be reined in big time on their plans for their live-action Spider-Man universe. (And before anyone goes "but the Spider-Verse movies are amazing", I didn't bring up the Spider-Verse films because they're separate from whatever Sony is doing with the live-action rights to the Spider-Man brand.)
Incidentally, they _do_ actually use the “as you know” cliché. The thing that pissed me off throughout the movie is the horrible (possibly dangerous) depiction of CPR and showing someone “how to do it.” Not once does Cassandra mention you have to blow air into the person’s lungs twice after a certain number of pumps but she outright says you just keep pumping as if all you have to do is keep going until they either make it or you lose them. And even before you begin pumping, you have to remove any and all possible constrictions from around their neck, check their pulse, and then you start pumping in intervals of 30 pumps, followed by 2 breaths of air, then repeat. At an EMS call she’s half-assedly pumping a guy’s chest without a single AED nearby (you can actually see her apply a breathing pump to his face rather poorly since she’s doing alone rather than a pair) and then suddenly the guy is alright enough to not need it so she can investigate one of her visions that comes true. She pulls her colleague who got T-boned as predicted out of the ambulance and just begins pumping his chest without opening his uniform collar nor does she *remove the big squawk box for his radio* from it. After a small bit she realizes the guy wasn’t able to make it as she sees her hands covered in his blood. Might have helped to check his pulse first and examine him for blood loss!😟 I don’t necessarily feel Ben was that bad, but most of the film was her being an unlikable bitch or a dumbass who doesn’t even try to go down the most logical paths to find a solution beyond looking evermore like a gaslighting child abductor. Plus all the other things you said that were pretty spot on. Frankly, I was more waiting for some actual clarification of where any of these powers and assets were coming from. Where did his suit come from? What powers does he have since Spider-Man’s powers have sometimes been natural and other times mechanical? How are they supposed to suddenly be endowed with the powers and/or equipment they’re destined to have from Sims’ premonitions? Why did the film set everything up like a Pogo Paradox (you try to stop something happening only to cause it to happen meaning you should have just sat around and did nothing) only for him to succeed in preventing his vision while still trying to make good on the idea of not being able to change the future since his visions still come true, just differently? This isn’t some gypsy fortune being read where you have vague details that can equivocally still be deemed true in the end but an actual visualization that is altered. At least _Minority Report_ brought up the issue of intercepting bad outcomes and forcing a better result nullifying the original prediction even if it sidestepped an answer.
if I recall correctly and i just saw this last night, Mary actually said "hi. I'm Ben's sister-in-law" to Cassie. not to Ben because of course Ben as her brother-in-law is someone she already knows well.
Actually thought Dakota was fine for most of the movie. Her final form in the end was awful, but at that point most things were pretty awful. So whatever. But I think all the women did pretty good jobs of acting here. Even though the younger girls were frustratingly badly character designed. They were just a little too much for innocent teenagers.
Yeah, and here we were at one point thinking that nothing could be worse for Dakota Johnson than the Fifty Shades Trilogy that Sean reviewed with dignity in its entirety. But Marvel proved us wrong... we should have seen that coming.
Yeah, pretty tired of 'super hero fatigue' and 'Uck, they put girls in the movie!'. Both are BS ideas that have somehow become common wisdom and it's lazy. Morbius flopped, yet nobody is saying it sucked because the main character was a guy or we are suffering from 'vampire fatigue'.
I haven't seen anyone actually say that the movie failed because of the female cast. However I do hear a lot of people CLAIMING TO HEAR that this and other female lead movie fail because of the female cast.
These people who blame women. Are grifters they think the only way filmmakers will make bank is to be like the bayformers and fifty shade of grays. Let me ask you this have you ever seen the quartering or Midnight edge or Clownfish TV talk about the idol or Fate the Winx Saga?
The former only made money because it took five installments for audiences to realize they just kept remaking the same film, the latter only made money because of, The, Lowest Common Denominator.
I try not looking at their dumbass rage bait videos whenever I see them in me feed while watching another video on UA-cam, like them claiming Kathleen Kennedy or Disney was pissed at South Park for mocking her/them, even though South Park (along with Family Guy and Simpsons) has been mocking Disney for years and not once did Disney strike back, because they know satire when they see it and trying to get mad at adult cartoons satirizing Disney is just petty and only adds fuel to the fire
@@erichfiedler1481Speaking of which, now that we've finally reached the end of the costly, strike(s), just exactly why is she remaining the head of Lucasfilm, no, seriously.
@@matthewdaley746 the bigger question is have those idiots actually watched the Panderverse special and realized that Cartman was basically them being mocked for this kind of thinking
I think I speak for everyone when I say “My favorite part of the movie was when Madame Web said ‘It’s Webbing time’ and proceeded to web all over the place.’
I must have the same power as Madame Web, because I could foresee this movie would suck. I will keep up my streak of not seeing Sony's movies from their "Spider-Man side characters without a Spider-Man" Universe, because I don't want to encourage their current behavior. I don't know who's being more irresponsible with their superhero properties, Sony, WB, or Disney.
The film was just OK--I wasn't bored by it, which makes it better than at least half the X-Men films. I confess I don't really understand many of the criticisms, which seem to be: (1) Ezekiel is using tech that didn't exist in 2002 (as if Iron Man armour exists?!); (2) the characters are unlikeable (neither was Peter Parker till Ben was shot); (3) the women aren't in costume much (this is a criticism fallacy, as it judges what you expected to see rather than what's there); and (4) bad dialogue... which is fair but doesn't merit the hate this film is getting. It just seems out of balance.
Wait... Ummm... Takes place in 2003? Uhhhh... According to the MCU, Peter Parker was born in 2001... So uh... They can't even get the year right... That is sad.
YES I agree I cant remember seeing this much backlash for a so-so movie people are going way way over board with there opinions on the movie its eye rolling
I lost interest immediately when I heard that they cast Dakota Johnson. I have NEVER been impressed with her "acting," and the thought of her in this movie just made me ill. She's miscast in SO many ways, not the least of which was that Cassandra Webb was introduced in the comics as a very old woman. She's never been a major character - she shows up, spouts some clairvoyant nonsense, and doesn't really do much else because I seem to recall she's blind and/or paralyzed or both - I forget which. I think Madame Web was kinda Marvel's version of DC's Madame Xanadu or maybe the Phantom Stranger. She had very little connection to the Spider-Verse originally, but that kinda changed in more recent comics. But she did NOT have "spider" powers -- which don't include clairvoyance anyway. But, yeah, I know, Peter Parker has spider-sense. Moving on. Then we have Ezekiel Sims, who has a VERY convoluted backstory, which is not reflected in the film at ALL. He was brought into the Spider-Man mythos when Marvel started suggesting that Peter is actually a spider avatar and his powers are more mystically-oriented than we believed. Which I still think is royally stupid. And Sims was apparently the first to gain the spider avatar powers, and he started keeping an eye on Peter because he (Sims) was being pursued by some monster and wanted the monster to go after Peter instead of him. The story that introduced Sims was all about responsibility and living up to one's potential, and Peter being a better man than thou - I haven't read comics in almost a decade now, so I really can't recall a lot of the storyline these days (and I gave up on Marvel entirely after One More Day pretty much compromised Peter anyway). Clearly, the intent was to do a Spider-Man story, gender-flipped, but not able to mention anything related to Spider-Man at all (which doesn't explain Ben and Richard Parker's presence, and the continuity is mystifying anyway). This is like the Catwoman movie where they couldn't mention anything relevant to the comic book character. Guys, if you're THAT limited, don't do the freaking movie!! Based on the reviews, however -- none of which are all that good -- I wonder if it's more intended as an introductory movie solely to set up future storylines in Phase 5, and not all that important in itself. Like The Marvels wound up being. Fine. Whatever. I haven't liked the MCU movies from the start, I haven't been to a movie theater since Covid, and I'm certainly not going to start either now. And I don't think it's superhero fatigue either - it's just that the movies turned out to be crap and Marvel ceased caring about anything except getting the next movie out now. Marvel - have something legitimate to say or give us ALL a break!
T2, was the last, Terminator, film, simple as that, James Cameron as much as admitted this by never directing another installment after the second film, period.
I gave up on Hollywood after 2021. Any sense of creativity has been strangled in the crib by people trying to get brownie points with liberals in superficial ways and executives that only promote advertising for blockbusters over mid budget and low budget films. We just get action films these days and they just get worse and worse and worse.
How will it be a train wreck? I mean, the directors' previous films have been received positively, and the writer of it has had a good track record as well.
I didnt find the movie that bad personally but it wasn't great at all but i didnt get some enjoyment out of it tho but the one thing I took from the movie is I feel bad for the actors and actresses Sony NEEDS TO DO WHAT DC DID STOP AND REBOOT FAST!! NO MORE MOVIES LIKE THIS WITHOUT SPIDER MAN
"it's a failure because it has women" is not blaming the women, it's blaming the fans with the excuse "toxic fans are sexist and racist". the problem are not the women in the movie, it never is, the problem is bad writing and uninteresting stories. hollywood likes to blame the fans when something flops.
@@DeetotheDubs I hope it's because he has the same opinion on OP's take as I do, because the fans ARE the problem. Just look at how viciously they treated She Hulk, which was made explicitly from a female lens. Like it or not, comic fans are extremely sexist.
I legitimately feel sorry for this movie. I stopped caring about all the discourse about this movie long ago when all the countless videos about it, have essentially just made it feel like the youtuber equivalent of bullying a special needs child.
@@matthewdaley746 Dead-On-Arrival solved my problem. I finally made some of it. I don't agree or disagree with it tho. Because I don't know enough about her and don't intend to learn more than I currently know.
It’s unsurprising this is a disappointment because that’s consistent with Sony after the abomination Morbius, and with 2 Venom movies that are weakass violent movies.
Playing devil's advocate here or advospider.... That pun attempt was unfunny, I'm sorry... I thought Madame Web was ok. Not great, but I didn't hate it. Totally understand everyone else's opinion though.
"The power to see horrible things happening before they actually happen." That's all of us watching the trailer.
Great haha
The fact that Dakota thought she got a role in the MCU, then fired her agent,or that she coudnt even name a single Spiderman movie is ludicrous.
"She didn't even look like she wanted to be there..."
Yep. The way it seems like it all went down, I'd have phoned it in too.
@@AlextheSuperfly Doesn't she always look like that?
It's like that meme based from Brooklyn 99: "Oh, yeah? Name 1 Spider-Man movie." "SPIDER-MAN!" "That one's on me, I set the bar too low."
It's not the MCU, it's the SSU.
The most misleading are the trailers and movie posters. As Sean said, don't expect to see the 3 Spider-woman in their costumes. (Except for a few seconds.) I guess it's the Hollywood version of clickbait.
This is the review I was waiting for! With even Nerdstalgic saying it was bad(and he usually tries to find a silver lining), I was eager to hear Sean's take on this clusterf*ck of a movie. Well done, Smeg!
And I would ABSOLUTELY be all in for a 2-hour CE about this "Movie." Do it.
female leads are not going to attract the big audiences period.
Well, that's provably untrue. Thanks for playing, though.
I'm predicting this is already a serious contender for the Razzies next year.
I remember super hero fatigue being an excuse for why Green Lantern failed back in 2011. Also, I want your Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles van
Green Lantern is just a very clunky version of “Doc” Smith’s old Lensman books. (The Japanese Lensman stuff is very unfaithful to Smith’s lore and might as well be considered something different.)
That's actually the complete 1987 TMNT series set that was released by Lionsgate years back, essentially putting together all the DVD releases they did of the show together. A bit hard to find now, as they've released a different plastic case/no van set since then.
Much like a real spider-web, it's a sticky mess that's all over the place.
What a shame...
When Fant4stic came out, I was adamantly convinced that no movie based on a Marvel property could ever be worse than it. Well, I guess Sony just said "hold my beer" because this completely dethroned it for me.
And I'll go a step further, this is probably one of the worst movies I've ever seen in my life in general in terms of editing, in terms of acting and just in terms of getting the basic concepts of telling a story right.
I hope Madame Web Gets Nominated for a Razzie for Worst Picture in 2025!!!
She should be used to that from the other three movies she's known for.
The thumbnail just sums it all up, really. The cast were great, but the execution was all over the place. Even Dakota Johnson was skeptical about the movie's quality during filming, when she had to react to fake explosions and blue and green screens.
So...who's excited for Dune next week?
I can already picture this being added to TVTropes' So Bad, It's Horrible section.
Totally Star Derailing Role.
It looks like Sean has to talk about another horrible Dakota Johnson movie.
Dakota Johnson is so wooden she's more suited to play Pinocchio
If GDT would make a sequel to Pinnochio, she would be a great PM Meloni or Mussolini's daughter stand-in.
Just made my day 🎉
Nah, not soulless enough for either. @@jakey14344
Honestly, this is such a disappointment to hear. My first introduction to Madame Web was through the 1994 animated Spider-Man series and to hear and see how this movie treated her along with several Spider Women characters. It really just hurts, I hope Madame Web and the Spider Women get a better movie. Those characters deserve it!!
Hopefully the animated Spider-Gwen film does that, and I hope to see the REAL Madame Web in Beyond the Spider-Verse, especially since she hasn't appeared in the previous Spider-Verse films
@@erichfiedler1481 same. I really hope to see her in Beyond the Spiderverse!! I really want to see the REAL Madame Web!!
@@Foustdoodles98 I mean the closest we had to her was Aunt May in the first film, and she was voiced by Miss Frizzle (it's true, worth the Google)
@@erichfiedler1481I want Helen Mirren to voice Madame Web.
Thank you SO much for countering that whole "superhero fatigue" nonsense. You are spot on in your assessment. Why do so many superhero films lately underperform... exactly as you noted: they're half-assed! Bad movies, regardless of genre, usually aren't going to fare so well at the box office. Go figure, right! Love that finally someone points out the BS in blaming the genre for the incompetence or laziness of the studios and filmmakers.
Passion and effort go a long way. Looknat the Flintstones 1994
Audiences are unpredictable, unquestionably.
@@frankieseward8667That film's success was a complete fluke, it was no better than, Viva Rock Vegas, which totally flopped, despite, bringing back the original director, which never happens, simple as that.
@@matthewdaley746 you know I want sean to do an episode on the Flintstones.
@@frankieseward8667 The backstory alone would last two hours, not, to mention, that it would be next to impossible for any potential video to survive the inevitable copyright strike, simple as that.
This is the BEST movie of '24.
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The reviews alone are comedy gold.
"Can we please stop blaming the women? They are not the problem here." EXACTLY! I am so sick of hearing this implicit sexist backlash against comic book movies with female protagonists.
Or female-led movies, in general. Probably it's the rock I live under talking, but I haven't so far seen people blaming the female cast. Maybe they are, somewhere, but I'm more than happy to ignore them. Idiots like that are attention whores.
The problem is not that the movie is female lead, the problem is that the movie being female lead is the only thought that goes in the head of those making this movies, character development, story and continuity be damned
Which I hate, because this keeps happening, and everyone just assumes it to mean that female led films don't work.
Female lead films DO work. It's that they need competent writers and directors to do so. Man these comments are so brain dead.🤦♀️
@@WobblesandBeanYes. I feel confident that people behind these films 95% of the time sabotage it on purpose.
@@SabrinaRina considering the high budgets and lack of (visible) quality on screen I think it's more about money laundering.
Oh, I see. I haven't watched (probably never will), but what I take from this is that the writers are some of those idiots who think "female" is a personality trait.
Wasn't there a couple people who wrote Morbius working on this too??
Yap, and thats not the worst movie they ever written, seriously every movie they ever wrote is utter crap!
Sony reedited Madam web, also doing ADR and some reshoots, to remove as many references to Peter Parker and Spider-Man from the film as possible. Either a licensing thing with Disney or they knew this film would bomb, had to release it for contractual reasons and just shoved it out in a way to minimise damage to the Spider-man film franchise. Possibly Sony has to make a Spider-Man movie every couple of years to keep the film rights.
Lets be honest no one had high expectations going into this movie.
You had expectations
@@lanterns_glow But were they high exceptions?
@@travishiltz4750 It's An MSheU flick (I unironically have to use that now...), The bar wasn't even present on the ground
@@lanterns_glowHarsh. But true.
I highly expected it to suck. Not surprisingly, it did.🫤
I was waiting for this review!! ❤ Honestly, the things I've been hearing about this movie are so unhinged that I think I'm going to go and watch it just for the chaos. 😈
As you already know, I left a comment on this video.
Future Cinematic Excrement episode?
God I hope so.
Either soon after the film hits Blu-ray or streaming, or when it inevitably wins the Worst Picture Razzie next year
@erichfiedler1481 this will no doubt be nominated, but I don't know if it will win. We have those 2 public domain Mickey Mouse horror films this year.
I think Dakota fired her agent after this movie...which is hilarious....and sad....but good for her....lol
Having parents who were once headliners, (truly shocking, I know), is much better for her, how much longer until the clock finally strikes midnight, probably not very long, no doubt.
I’m so glad to be done with the Sonyverse after Morbius.
Also: dear Dark Universe, I’m sorry for making fun of you.
I wouldn't blame the writers, the writer of The Hangover 3 made Chernobyl, the writers of Problem Child wrote Ed Wood. The director also wrote this film.
What do you have against Problem Child?
The co writer of hangover 3 also co created THE LAST OF US TV series.
So this isnt the 90s spiderman tas madame web? Also, fun fact: that madame web was voiced by stan lee's wife
Fun Fact: Prince Eric voiced Spider-Man in that series, it was the first time he'd get betrayed by the network in animated form, by, Executive Meddling, (unfortunately, not the last).
anyone wanna bet this will get a nomination for worst picture at the next Golden Raspberry Awards?
This is the best of all the "50 Shades" sequels. Like "Empire Strikes Back", but less snow.
Dakota Johnson's career is only continuing because of nepotism, simple as that.
@@matthewdaley746 Yeah sure, because if there are two people in Hollywood who have enough stroke in 2024 to twist Sony Pictures' arm to give their daughter a leading role in an $80-million movie, it's... drum roll...
_Don Johnson and Melanie Griffith._
One hasn't been a lead actor in anything that made money in decades, the other barely works at all anymore - and they're mostly known for being "problematic" and PIAs for people who have to do business with them.
Whatever you're smoking, it's either way too much or not enough.
@@henrygvidonas9573You seem to know a lot about smoking certain substances, try taking some of your own advice, there's nothing that screams, "shameless," more than a performer using their own name, how else can you possibly explain the career of Bryce Dallas Hackard.
@@matthewdaley746 She's great in Bad Times at the El Royale. She's great in The Peanut Butter Falcon. I don't want to hold Fifty Shades against her for her entire career.
@@MrChaotic4Forgiveness Is Divine, unquestionably.
Theory:
Matt Sazama & Burk Sharpless are comically obedient to the wishes of studio executives.
I will never understand why Sony is still trying to push their own live-action spider-verse when they already have a perfectly good Playstation brand and the Boys
Honestly doubt this could even be called a superhero movie.
And people say A.I. _isn't_ being used during the creation of these movies
Certain aspects of these movies' screenplays physically cannot be written with AI programs. It's just ordinary bad writing.
You will most likely have to do a Cinematic Excrement episode on it after it wins Worst Picture at the 2025 Razzie Awards! So far, it's a early Worst Picture contender for next year's Razzies!
I was waiting for this!
Between this and the 50 Shades movies, Dakota Johnson needs to fire her agent. Preferably out of a cannon. Into the Sun.
Nepotism always protects her.
The bit about Ma Parker introducing herself to Uncle Ben as "your sister-in-law" reminds me of the infamous Folgers coffee "incest" advert:
"I must have the wrong house!"
"Sister!"
The adr was straight up bad chinese movie hilarious 😂😅 like how tf did they 0 effort to match it??
I saw the thumbnail and had a vision of how this review was going to go...and I was right.
Best review/reaction I've seen. Sweet and too the point. Great!
Spiderverse and the MCU Spider-Man movies are the only thing keeping the films rights with Sony.
I was really lucky predicting the MCU/Sony deal and Fant4stic being the end of Fox’s hold on the team, but I’m doing it again. This is the start to when Sony loses control of their hold on whatever Marvel properties they have. Either they’re going to have to sell them back to Disney or they’re going to be bought out just like Fox was.
No Way Home made almost two billion dollars. They're not giving Spider-Man to Disney.
@@coolnerdlll6053 Perhaps you didn’t read the first part of my comment.
@@Torterra625 No, I did. I'm eliminating one of your two suggestions.
@@coolnerdlll6053 Yeah, selling the rights back is a long shot. Them being bought out is more likely
@@coolnerdlll6053Option two is more likely
Thank you for addressing that at the beginning. Madame Web didn’t fail because of superhero movie fatigue nor because it started a woman. It failed because it sucked.
I had no desire to see this film, and I still stand by my decision
After seeing the recent painfully unfunny Honest Trailers thing, this was a good palette cleanser😅
I stopped watching Honest Trailers a year ago. What happened?
I would watch two two-hour review of Madam Web would be more entertaining than the actual movie. 8:06
🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
I can only recommend the god awful movie podcast for you !
Apparently, the writers were willing to butcher the script for Dracula Untold to whatever producers wanted that they are known as willing to play ball with to studios, so they get hired when a studio needs studio notes turned into movies.... All those movies suck, and they never earn money, but apparently that's still a desirable trait...
Dracula Untold made 217 million against a budget of 70 million.
Thank you for your service
Madame Web wishes us an early Halloween as the words of ISB supervisor Blevin ring out in all our minds "It took the combined ingredients of idiocy, ineptitude, and total disengagement for this farce to have reached the full apex of incredulous disaster."
8:54 Silk, Spider-Boy, Spider-Gwen, Anti-Venom (whether it be Eddie Brock or Flash Thompson), Mayday Parker/Spider-Girl (or any of Peter and MJ's other children in the comics), Ben Reilly, Kaine, Spider-Man Noir, Spider-UK, Spider-Punk, Spider-Ham, Peni Parker, Spider-Man J, Spider-Bitch, and Spider-Man 2099, all of these are films I'd much rather have than a Madame Web movie.
Your pose reflected the entire world. The writing in this movie was on another level of bad.
We allready have Hazbin Hotel with Angel with Spider. We don't need another Spider.
Cue Tina Turner.
"Out of the ruins
Out from the wreckage
Can't make the same mistake this time
We are the children
The last generation (the last generation, generation)
We are the ones they left behind
And, I wonder when we are ever gonna change, change
Living under the fear, 'til nothing else remains
We don't need another Spider..."
How they can create a masterpiece like "Across the Spider-Verse" and then crank out this turd just baffles me.
You seriously think the people of Spiderverse wrote this hunk of crap?
There’s always A and a B team to studio writers. The team that wrote this isn’t deserving of even being called a C team.
LOL!! Even with New Rockstars (who always--ALWAYS) find good things to say about lousy movies found it hard NOT to laugh at this film!! That's saying something!
This was something that I talked to my mother and another person on Threads about. As much as we enjoy laughing at Sony for tripping over their shoelaces with Morbius and now Madame Web, the truth of the matter is that there was a reason why Marvel Studios had to rein in on Sony's BS when it came time for Spider-Man to appear in the MCU. From what I'm hearing, Sony's now putting in all their eggs into the basket that is the Kraven the Hunter movie as a "go big or go home" thing on their current attempts for a Spider-Man universe without Spider-Man. The problem is that this is, what, the third time Sony is doing this- they've done this song and dance with Spider-Man 3 and The Amazing Spider-Man 2. At this point, Sony needs to be reined in big time on their plans for their live-action Spider-Man universe.
(And before anyone goes "but the Spider-Verse movies are amazing", I didn't bring up the Spider-Verse films because they're separate from whatever Sony is doing with the live-action rights to the Spider-Man brand.)
Incidentally, they _do_ actually use the “as you know” cliché.
The thing that pissed me off throughout the movie is the horrible (possibly dangerous) depiction of CPR and showing someone “how to do it.” Not once does Cassandra mention you have to blow air into the person’s lungs twice after a certain number of pumps but she outright says you just keep pumping as if all you have to do is keep going until they either make it or you lose them. And even before you begin pumping, you have to remove any and all possible constrictions from around their neck, check their pulse, and then you start pumping in intervals of 30 pumps, followed by 2 breaths of air, then repeat. At an EMS call she’s half-assedly pumping a guy’s chest without a single AED nearby (you can actually see her apply a breathing pump to his face rather poorly since she’s doing alone rather than a pair) and then suddenly the guy is alright enough to not need it so she can investigate one of her visions that comes true. She pulls her colleague who got T-boned as predicted out of the ambulance and just begins pumping his chest without opening his uniform collar nor does she *remove the big squawk box for his radio* from it. After a small bit she realizes the guy wasn’t able to make it as she sees her hands covered in his blood. Might have helped to check his pulse first and examine him for blood loss!😟
I don’t necessarily feel Ben was that bad, but most of the film was her being an unlikable bitch or a dumbass who doesn’t even try to go down the most logical paths to find a solution beyond looking evermore like a gaslighting child abductor. Plus all the other things you said that were pretty spot on.
Frankly, I was more waiting for some actual clarification of where any of these powers and assets were coming from. Where did his suit come from? What powers does he have since Spider-Man’s powers have sometimes been natural and other times mechanical? How are they supposed to suddenly be endowed with the powers and/or equipment they’re destined to have from Sims’ premonitions? Why did the film set everything up like a Pogo Paradox (you try to stop something happening only to cause it to happen meaning you should have just sat around and did nothing) only for him to succeed in preventing his vision while still trying to make good on the idea of not being able to change the future since his visions still come true, just differently? This isn’t some gypsy fortune being read where you have vague details that can equivocally still be deemed true in the end but an actual visualization that is altered. At least _Minority Report_ brought up the issue of intercepting bad outcomes and forcing a better result nullifying the original prediction even if it sidestepped an answer.
if I recall correctly and i just saw this last night, Mary actually said "hi. I'm Ben's sister-in-law" to Cassie. not to Ben because of course Ben as her brother-in-law is someone she already knows well.
Actually thought Dakota was fine for most of the movie. Her final form in the end was awful, but at that point most things were pretty awful. So whatever. But I think all the women did pretty good jobs of acting here. Even though the younger girls were frustratingly badly character designed. They were just a little too much for innocent teenagers.
2:30 yeah, was wondering the same thing.
Yeah, and here we were at one point thinking that nothing could be worse for Dakota Johnson than the Fifty Shades Trilogy that Sean reviewed with dignity in its entirety. But Marvel proved us wrong... we should have seen that coming.
My eyes keep focusing on that tmnt truck on the background. I'm quite sure that's an early sign of something gone wrong.
Funny thing is that they were ready to blame male audiences if it flopped. And I was ready to say “No, Wonder Woman was good and your movie sucks.”
But Sean, tell us how you really feel about this movie? 😂
You need to review more bad superhero movies like Elektra, Barb Wire, and the Phantom.
Yeah, pretty tired of 'super hero fatigue' and 'Uck, they put girls in the movie!'.
Both are BS ideas that have somehow become common wisdom and it's lazy.
Morbius flopped, yet nobody is saying it sucked because the main character was a guy or we are suffering from 'vampire fatigue'.
Yeah, it flopped because Jared Leto's, terrible-annoying, in superhero films, he'd just been in another wretched one, simple as that.
I haven't seen anyone actually say that the movie failed because of the female cast. However I do hear a lot of people CLAIMING TO HEAR that this and other female lead movie fail because of the female cast.
Dakota Johnson REALLY need to rethink her agents💦
The best Madame Web was Joan Lee.
8:08 Sean make it as long of a video you need it to be man either way I will definitely watch the hell out it
These people who blame women. Are grifters they think the only way filmmakers will make bank is to be like the bayformers and fifty shade of grays. Let me ask you this have you ever seen the quartering or Midnight edge or Clownfish TV talk about the idol or Fate the Winx Saga?
The former only made money because it took five installments for audiences to realize they just kept remaking the same film, the latter only made money because of, The, Lowest Common Denominator.
I try not looking at their dumbass rage bait videos whenever I see them in me feed while watching another video on UA-cam, like them claiming Kathleen Kennedy or Disney was pissed at South Park for mocking her/them, even though South Park (along with Family Guy and Simpsons) has been mocking Disney for years and not once did Disney strike back, because they know satire when they see it and trying to get mad at adult cartoons satirizing Disney is just petty and only adds fuel to the fire
@@erichfiedler1481Speaking of which, now that we've finally reached the end of the costly, strike(s), just exactly why is she remaining the head of Lucasfilm, no, seriously.
@@matthewdaley746 the bigger question is have those idiots actually watched the Panderverse special and realized that Cartman was basically them being mocked for this kind of thinking
@@erichfiedler1481Seriously, took wrong message.
It was abysmal!
I think I speak for everyone when I say “My favorite part of the movie was when Madame Web said ‘It’s Webbing time’ and proceeded to web all over the place.’
What a disaster. Definitely a worst picture contender
I must have the same power as Madame Web, because I could foresee this movie would suck. I will keep up my streak of not seeing Sony's movies from their "Spider-Man side characters without a Spider-Man" Universe, because I don't want to encourage their current behavior. I don't know who's being more irresponsible with their superhero properties, Sony, WB, or Disney.
OH it's by the same guys who made Morbius...that explains a lot.
i mean even the studio knows this isn't great, dropping in February and all.
I knew this movie was going to suck since day one
The film was just OK--I wasn't bored by it, which makes it better than at least half the X-Men films. I confess I don't really understand many of the criticisms, which seem to be: (1) Ezekiel is using tech that didn't exist in 2002 (as if Iron Man armour exists?!); (2) the characters are unlikeable (neither was Peter Parker till Ben was shot); (3) the women aren't in costume much (this is a criticism fallacy, as it judges what you expected to see rather than what's there); and (4) bad dialogue... which is fair but doesn't merit the hate this film is getting. It just seems out of balance.
Dpes this even QUALIFY as a Superhero movie? None of the women actually BECOME their hero selves in it except for very brief glimpses
You've got to do a full-blown cinematic excrement episode on this movie it is without a doubt one the worst superhero movies I've ever seen.
I only went to see this cause my dollar voucher was gonna expire
Wait... Ummm... Takes place in 2003? Uhhhh... According to the MCU, Peter Parker was born in 2001... So uh... They can't even get the year right... That is sad.
From my point of view, I thought Madam Webb was fine. I didn't think it was good at all, but it was a C movie, which is fine.
YES I agree I cant remember seeing this much backlash for a so-so movie people are going way way over board with there opinions on the movie its eye rolling
I lost interest immediately when I heard that they cast Dakota Johnson. I have NEVER been impressed with her "acting," and the thought of her in this movie just made me ill. She's miscast in SO many ways, not the least of which was that Cassandra Webb was introduced in the comics as a very old woman. She's never been a major character - she shows up, spouts some clairvoyant nonsense, and doesn't really do much else because I seem to recall she's blind and/or paralyzed or both - I forget which. I think Madame Web was kinda Marvel's version of DC's Madame Xanadu or maybe the Phantom Stranger. She had very little connection to the Spider-Verse originally, but that kinda changed in more recent comics. But she did NOT have "spider" powers -- which don't include clairvoyance anyway. But, yeah, I know, Peter Parker has spider-sense. Moving on.
Then we have Ezekiel Sims, who has a VERY convoluted backstory, which is not reflected in the film at ALL. He was brought into the Spider-Man mythos when Marvel started suggesting that Peter is actually a spider avatar and his powers are more mystically-oriented than we believed. Which I still think is royally stupid. And Sims was apparently the first to gain the spider avatar powers, and he started keeping an eye on Peter because he (Sims) was being pursued by some monster and wanted the monster to go after Peter instead of him. The story that introduced Sims was all about responsibility and living up to one's potential, and Peter being a better man than thou - I haven't read comics in almost a decade now, so I really can't recall a lot of the storyline these days (and I gave up on Marvel entirely after One More Day pretty much compromised Peter anyway).
Clearly, the intent was to do a Spider-Man story, gender-flipped, but not able to mention anything related to Spider-Man at all (which doesn't explain Ben and Richard Parker's presence, and the continuity is mystifying anyway). This is like the Catwoman movie where they couldn't mention anything relevant to the comic book character. Guys, if you're THAT limited, don't do the freaking movie!!
Based on the reviews, however -- none of which are all that good -- I wonder if it's more intended as an introductory movie solely to set up future storylines in Phase 5, and not all that important in itself. Like The Marvels wound up being. Fine. Whatever. I haven't liked the MCU movies from the start, I haven't been to a movie theater since Covid, and I'm certainly not going to start either now. And I don't think it's superhero fatigue either - it's just that the movies turned out to be crap and Marvel ceased caring about anything except getting the next movie out now. Marvel - have something legitimate to say or give us ALL a break!
This film isn't even in the MCU, this film is part of Sony's live-action Cinematic Spider-Verse
This movie is a SONY film. Not an MCU film.
@@mttylerdurden9 Yeah, I know. Still not interested.
@@erichfiedler1481 Then why did they have to avoid any reference to Peter and May Parker?
@@kali3665 I have no clue why, why did you think Madame Web is part of the MCU?
This feels like the worst version of this film from idea to studio execution.
Maybe the Parkers eloped 🤷🏾♂️
Madame Web was just a Terminator movie.
T2, was the last, Terminator, film, simple as that, James Cameron as much as admitted this by never directing another installment after the second film, period.
Look, I get that you have to see movies to make content, but seriously - You're entering into Sado Maso territory here.
I gave up on Hollywood after 2021. Any sense of creativity has been strangled in the crib by people trying to get brownie points with liberals in superficial ways and executives that only promote advertising for blockbusters over mid budget and low budget films. We just get action films these days and they just get worse and worse and worse.
I’m so excited for the hilarious trainwreck Kraven will be
How will it be a train wreck?
I mean, the directors' previous films have been received positively, and the writer of it has had a good track record as well.
Totally surely predictable, unquestionably.
@@cyborgparrot1996ATJ's films have been pretty lousy since the rather fluky success of the original Kick-A**.
@@matthewdaley746who is ATJ? The director of KRAVEN is JC Chandor.
@@matthewdaley746who is ATJ? The director of KRAVEN is JC Chandor.
Thank God I never ever went to see it.
This movies rivals Fant4stic in terms of how terrible it is and that's really saying something.
This is probably going to be forgotten in a few years. People will never forget Fant4stic.
I didnt find the movie that bad personally but it wasn't great at all but i didnt get some enjoyment out of it tho but the one thing I took from the movie is I feel bad for the actors and actresses Sony NEEDS TO DO WHAT DC DID STOP AND REBOOT FAST!! NO MORE MOVIES LIKE THIS WITHOUT SPIDER MAN
Madame Web was written by an A.I.
The actresses who played the three girls were at least trying. They did the best they could with some BAD material.
2:57 So they’re about on par with Elon Musk.
Or, Jason Marsden, who truly should be a character actor, (if that), and, yet, Disney's, somehow, been enabling him for four decades, for, "reasons."
"it's a failure because it has women" is not blaming the women, it's blaming the fans with the excuse "toxic fans are sexist and racist".
the problem are not the women in the movie, it never is, the problem is bad writing and uninteresting stories.
hollywood likes to blame the fans when something flops.
That is just mental gymnastics, but good for you.
@@RawbeardX How is that mental gymnastics? Are you saying the woman actually are to blame?
@@DeetotheDubs I hope it's because he has the same opinion on OP's take as I do, because the fans ARE the problem. Just look at how viciously they treated She Hulk, which was made explicitly from a female lens. Like it or not, comic fans are extremely sexist.
It was the same thing with Marvels. I didn't care that it starred women of different ethnicities. I just didn't like the movie.
RE the cast: Jill Hennessy is cast as 'Beautiful Woman', and why? she's somewhat plain, with all due courtesy possible. !
I legitimately feel sorry for this movie. I stopped caring about all the discourse about this movie long ago when all the countless videos about it, have essentially just made it feel like the youtuber equivalent of bullying a special needs child.
2:03 barbie wasn’t a super hero movie so it’s irrelevant to superhero movies.
I am very sad they wasted Adam Scott for some stupid stuff like this. That dude is awesome.
Dakota Johnson's the only actress whose career's not, D.O.A., and, that's seriously due to nepotism, period.
@@matthewdaley746 I don't know what DOA means. Actually I could not make sense of the whole sentence.
@arbozaliyan Dead-On-Arrival, your problems are the kind nobody can help you with, that sentence was fairly straightforward.
@@matthewdaley746 Dead-On-Arrival solved my problem. I finally made some of it. I don't agree or disagree with it tho. Because I don't know enough about her and don't intend to learn more than I currently know.
@@arbozaliyanOpinions are ours, unquestionably.
It’s unsurprising this is a disappointment because that’s consistent with Sony after the abomination Morbius, and with 2 Venom movies that are weakass violent movies.
Playing devil's advocate here or advospider.... That pun attempt was unfunny, I'm sorry... I thought Madame Web was ok. Not great, but I didn't hate it. Totally understand everyone else's opinion though.