That's the one that gets me. Why, if you are going to cheat, do something like bring them into a place where your partner has ANY access and some form of control? At least a crappy, low rent motel is harder for them to get video of you cheating.
The answer to both you and Murdock can be simply 1 of 2 things, Option 1: cheating can be like getting high and the risker it is the more of a rush you get and the more you get away with it the higher your high gets or Option 2: your in so deep into what reddit calls "The Affair Fog" that you can't honestly tell what is right or wrong nor what is moral or not anymore
@@tyreesesolomon8907 ha! I've never been in a relationship and I've only ever known kissed 1 girl, I just listen to a lot of Reddit while working out and I a unquie way of understanding the human thought process
The confession note she wrote is probably the most in depth honest confession I’ve heard from the adulterer. Not pushing him to do what they want and recognize that they did something evil.
That's the trick. She is pushing him away to make him miss her. The reason why he had that unconscious desire to watch the video again and again is his subconsciente reminding him what has happened. How he felt. Denying his visit is preventing him from closure, so he is still open up to recon. She might be depressed now, because when Narcissistic persons lost their attention, then the world ends for them. And trust me. She is Narcissistic.
@@TheAsmodhashe left her son without food for days and practically abused herself for weeks. What makes you think she is in a mental state capable of abuse? Do you think her being diagnosed with depression and being in a hospital is also some cheap trick?
@@thecolorblue1635I think that it’s possible to fake anything to get your way if you have absolutely no morals or shame, that being said those types of people are very rare and it’s more likely she actually was fucked up over everything rather than acting for salvation
@@TheAsmodha Bro what? She risked having her kid taken away and being put in jail for child abuse... to prove a point to him? If she was capable of that level of cruelty he would have noticed it before, not particularly with him but with other things/people she wasn't fond of.
To quote (poorly) a smart guy, the difference between love and lust becomes obvious when it's time to make some sacrifices (time, effort, short-term happiness )
Honestly, I'm of the mind that infidelity is an immediate end of the relationship but this situation might be the only thing that could potentially make me reconsider. If a kid were not involved I'd be out there yesterday as I'm sure everyone would but this whole thing is just sad. This is probably the only story like this I've heard where the cheating spouse seemed to immediately recognize what they did was wrong, suffered for it in a hell of their own making, and more importantly didn't try to buy back the life they just threw away. Ironically, her essentially accepting that her old life is completely destroyed and that she did it herself probably increases the chances of her actually being able to get some of it back.
@@TheAndroidNextDoor eh, there was another one on this channel where OPs wife got pregnant and he didn't find out the kid wasn't his until 15 years down the line. Turns out the wife was roped and her mind coped with incident by tricking herself into thinking it was a mistake on her part. This was backed up a therapist and by the guy that forced himself on her confessing that he did it on his death bed basically. There are some instances where reconciliation is possible but those are few and far between.
@@TheAndroidNextDoor I second this. That sounded extremely sincere and extremely remorseful, more than anything I’ve ever seen. Usually the cheetah will blame deflect, and hold their partner, accountable, or friends, or life, events, or the AP, etc. And usually they do it multiple times with multiple different people before they are caught, but it genuinely seem like she only did it with that one other guy and the reason that she described. The mental health played a huge factor, so I have some understanding and empathy, but if I was him, I still would walk away. I don’t care what the excuses, she had a husband and a son. A husband who took care of a child that wasn’t even his for over a decade and she couldn’t put her selfish needs aside? She deserves nothing from him and I’m glad he sees it that way, but he probably went back to her, that’s why it ended where it does.
For me, it's the fact that it's so messy that makes it real. People like to write a beginning, middle, and end where someone is the villian and someone else is the hero. This is just really sad
And this, boys and girls, is why you should always learn to love yourself first. Because if you truly love yourself you won't end up sabotaging yourself just so you can get some attention and "love" from others.
I don't think it's about loving yourself first. I didn't love myself until after I met my fiance, and I'm head of heels in love with him! He loved me when my self hate was at its highest and helped me learn to love myself.
@@tricjoseph9879 Wait, I think you're missing the point, tho. It's great you had that experience. I'm glad you are the type of person who can learn through others and evolve socially (:! Congrats on the relationship, too btw! However, sadly, not everyone has that ability or has the same experiences with partners. ): Some people (especially those who are dealing with childhood trauma on various levels) may struggle with self-acceptance, internal recognition, or other forms of general self-image issues. The thing is, learning self-love is something that helps us triumph over those difficulties and improve our mental image and ability to respond to our environment with self-respect. Learning self-respect also helps mature your moral compass and improves your decision-making skills. Learning to love yourself before getting into a relationship arms you with a list of advantages such as: avoiding red flags, confidence in yourself to know when someone's gaslighting you, to see your partner's actions without insecurities clouding your sense of judgment, improved ability to communicate needs without fear, less anxiety, etc. What works for one person may not work for others, but that's why learning self-love first can help A LOT of people avoid heartbreak and other forms of trauma.
People love differently and that doesn't always make them prioritise loved one and not think of consequences of their actions. People are flawed creatures.
Yes, let's totally disregard the fact that she has a diagnosed disease that contributed to the situation, had she "loved herself first" her brain wouldn't have the chemical inbalance that let her into depression and she wouldn't have cheated because of those thoughts as a result... In a normal scenario, I'd agree 100% with you. However, we are dealing with a mental illness here - diagnosed by professionals, she's still being treated for it. From what we know, it's impossible to tell how much her actions were influenced by her illness, thus defeating the point of your argument. Don't get me wrong, regardless of the reason the fact is that she cheated and permanetly damaged her relationship, probably beyond repair. I only disagree with how simplified you made the situation to be.
he is a fool who is being used, he should divorce her the moment he finds out she is cheating her reason are for her and for her only, she cheats leave does not matter why she did it
@@thematrix2661divorce is a process you can’t divorce the second you find out and he’s not a Fool for feeling he had been betrayed and needing to leave.
You really should feel bad about OP. Bcs emotionally-weak-man was about to take the cheater back The guy basicly doesnt have a backbone and seems to round his life on his marriege and bad things happens when you dont have a life about yourself
Even in sims they don’t autonomously cheat with someone that isn’t their partner. You, as the player, have to actively MAKE your sim cheat, even then they feel BAD about it. Sims are more loyal than this woman 😂
I hate that excuse, I absolutely loathe it. It is - be it consciously or subconsciously - designed to liberate the cheater of guilt, accountability and responsibility. They couldn't help it, you see! They're actually the real victims here! They lost control and couldn't stop it from happening! MY AFFAIR PARTNER MADE ME DO IT, HE'S THE BAD GUY! It's psychological self-preservation on their end, they do everything they can to minimize the damage, to limit their accountability. They first and foremost try to protect themselves, over their partner. Even when they're wailing on about how they're scum who don't deserve their partner, the true victim of their cheating, they still fall back on the "I lost control, I couldn't stop it" narrative. Between every damn apology they squeeze in excuses or justifications, which clearly shows you that the apology isn't 100% sincere.
Human being s are very compulsive creatures aka they do very many things without thinking about it or without choosing to they just do it so it is true that a lot of the cheaters just lose control
I am bipolar and all I can say is your illness is not your fault but it is your responsibility. Your illness does not erase the actual hurt you cause people. Hope she gets herself in order so she can take care of her son. Her son needs her. Even tought certain behaviours occur due to the illness OP has every right to feel what he is feeling and even leave his wife. Her actions still happened and hurt OP. Edit: spelling error.
Even tho I agree with you, take in count that her bipolarity was undiagnosed until after the affair, I don't think you can make yourself responsible of something you don't know you have.
Thank you for this. As someone who lives with seemingly lifelong depression, it's so frustrating to see people blame their depression for issues in their life but never do anything to improve it.
@@luxzord865 Yes I somewhat agree, but still, she did cause hurt and harm to people. I have hurt people when undiagnosed and when having a manic episodes after the diagnosis since medicine doesnt complitely erase the possibility to have those only helps to manage and prevent and when the symptoms start they may help to dodge it. Also after diagnosis the person with the illness should practise to pinpoint if new episode is starting for example i tend to have too mutch creativity that i constantly without stop draw, dont sleep mutch, spend too mutch money, have overly elevated mood and many more. And this is just the start. Also the ill individual may deny that they are staring an episode if they are too far gone so it is important to have close ones who know so they can help and medical support system. I personally tend to deny since I feel like im "cured" somehow since I feel wery happy. However when you hurt somebody you did hurt them. There is something more to it when the person did it because of an illness but it did still happen and the person who was hurt by the other party gets to feel the feelings they are feeling and gets to break up with the other person if they wish to do so. Illness is an factor should be taken in count somewhat but it does not erase the thing that happened. Both have to be able to live with it.
The short answer is that OP (in my opinion) should either try separation or divorce. By the end he's clearly afraid of what the future will hold and he wants to go back to the way things were before. Things will never go back, though, especially since his relationship had already been broken for years. His best bet is to focus on his son and himself, and revisit this once he's healed. It will take years. His wife might not ever get to be a mom again, and his son might never want her to be his mom again. But she's shown that she can't be responsible for her son, between the bad choices and the mental breakdown that followed. Focusing on himself and his son will show his son how to healthily manage a crisis like this. Going back to the wife will hurt his son in so many ways.
This is an old story, but I guess I disagree. If I was advising him I would tell him to have her sign a Post Nup that would be 100% in his favor. Next up she agrees that he adopts the boy. Next up would be the removal of all social media. Then there would be a lot of others things like a lie detector etc. My reasoning is this. As it stands now he could get screwed in divorce and never see the boy again. He doesn't want that to happen and he could leverage her now to protect himself in the future. He can also test the waters to see if she is really committed to reconciliation and if he can handle it as well. This would take some serious time, but the reality is that divorce is horrible and he stated the fact about other women out there.
I bet OP thinks he's some masculine man now going back to his cheating wife. He doesn't love himself and that alone is why he will fail his son. His greatest asset of a father is saving his son from his own mother. That's it. His version of being a man is not loving himself and allowing such a disrespectful act of deception. Poor kid. His mom is evil and his dad is a weak simp.
yeah me neither. obviously cheater sucks,but it almost sounds like she’s not aware of anything. at times op comes off as volatile and violent. i just feel sad for the kid being stuck in that situation.
I feel good about this one. Like people had problems and life made them aware of it. And then they started to hurt, make decisions and try to be better. I like how OP really thought not only about his healing but for all people he care about too.
@julesr6965 idk he doesn't come off as violent to me. Just unstable. If he was violent I think the wife and mum who know him personally would be afraid of him beating the wife to death.
@@tottoro7830Good point! Most of these posts the cheater has little to no remorse and will try to gaslight the OP or use them as a scapegoat. But in this one you can't really jump to "divorce her!" Mode knowing the circumstances. I am not justifying the cheating or saying that mental illness is an excuse. As mental illness is no excuse to hurt others. Ever. I'm honestly sick and tired of people using that excuse to steamroll others tbh. But considering her actions afterwards? Like cheaters don't usually confess to everyone they know about their dirty little secret. Like that's not a norm for them. I think she wasn't brave enough to tell him in person and was banking on someone ratting her out. I listen to all these stories and think "Don't fall for it op! They're full of it!". But in this one her actions following the cheating don't align with the norm of cheaters. Such as remorse. I think she needs to work on herself and learn to be stronger for her husband and son. She's hurt them tremendously and knows it. But beating herself up this bad isn't going to solve anything. Yeah she apologized. Yeah she's sorry (maybe?). So her next to step should be to TAKE ACTION. Not grovel and kiss his feet. She should stand up, look him in the eye, and help him heal! If you're going to own up to what you do and are remorseful you should also prove you want to better yourself. As for OP, he has a golden heart and it's a pity she shattered it. I truly wish the best for him and his family. He is thoughtful and self aware. It's obvious he does a lot of introspection which is a great tool for healing. (Personal experience). I hope he finds his peace and has it protected for the rest of his days. As for the son, I hope he realizes how much OP loves him and never forgets it. I hope when OP grows old and feeble that the son cares for him the way a loving elder should be cared for. And I hope when he gets older he finds a girl that treats him better than his mother treated OP. This is bittersweet all around. Yeah they got hurt but they are bettering themselves. And I find that to be the most important thing to do regardless how your life is going.
Iam finding patterns strongly believe that's she a sociopath and manipulator ,,,the fact that she starved her son for two days is unacceptable....OP should just take his son and move countries ..man I've seen things like these many times where the woman goes through guilt and ends up killing the husband and their child
She got the consequences she deserved, unfortunately the kid was dragged with her. Op must NEVER get back with her as it's not purely pity, have her admitted to fix herself and maybe if she can handle it, in the future be mutually stable paternal figures
you can pretty much 100% guarantee he will get back with her. The last 5 minutes were painful to listen to. Literally just the guy gaslighting himself into all the reasons why her cheating is acceptable and he shouldn't expect anything better. "the chances of her cheating now are less than the chances of a new partner cheating!". Like Jesus Christ. His wife refuses to even talk to him and this is what he's like, so imagine how easy he is to manipulate once she begins a conversation.
@@CosmicAeon The second he referred to her as a victim that just happened to be caught by a predator everything was over. I must give it to her though she was very quick on the poor devastated wife act and was one step ahead of him the entire story like going around confessing before he could spread the word or preparing the super honest diary. You could see how truly honest and broken up about it she was when he first confronted her and she was gaslighting him because he didn't have solid evidence and returned to the affair like nothing happened because she thought she got away with it.
The hell @Mytelefe ? Why are you assuming that it's immediately some intricate scheme to win him over, completely ignoring the possibility that she might actually be sorry. Not everyone completely agrees with what they are doing; If you don't believe me, try looking up cognitive dissonance or addiction. And I say this AS A POSSIBILITY, not certainty.
@@Jhopmemes people who have enough empathy to have a breakdown over the way they've treated others also tend to have the empathy not to cheat multiple times and destroy their family in the first place. It's a fair assumption. A long term affair is not exactly something that happens by accident.
There are so many people who mistake the residual feelings for someone and the memory of a relationship for love. You dont love that person anymore (at least you shouldn't) you are just feeling that feeling you get after a part of your life crumbles, its like the desire to get back what you lost. You love the version of that person before you find out who they really are. You miss the relationship you used to have. Love doesn't exist for people who would destroy someone elses entire world for their own selfish desires.
I’ve heard so many people say they idolize their exes. They forget all the horrible things, focus on only the positives that existed in the relationship, truly believe they missed out on something in the relationship and want to go back. I’m the opposite, my ex was awful. We had some good times over the years but all I can remember are the horrible things (cheating, lying, mental and emotional abuse), there’s just NOTHING to idolize with him and I’m so thankful I finally walked away. I stayed single for almost 5 years to fully heal from everything he did, then met my awesome husband that is everything my ex could never be
At the end he's just scared. It's not uncommon for people to feel like he did in these situations. He can't see what the future holds, but he knows what he used to have. He's afraid to face the unknown, and afraid to be even more hurt than he is now. It's tough, but I do think the best thing for him is to at minimum separate if not divorce. Even if he doesn't find another partner, he has his son. Time will show that having his son can partially fill the hole in his heart, and he'll be able to fill the rest with self care. Then maybe some day, he'll find love again and have the courage to try.
some men just cannot handle being alone or on their own. its unfortunate, but we cant save someone who doesnt want to be saved. all we can do is remind him that if he gets cheated on again, its purely his own fault. because hes the one who decided to take her back.
@@idkissausername1667 I absolutely agree with you on this fact. A lot of men and women too, simply remain in a toxic/cheating relationship just because they are scared of being alone after getting seperated. They'd rather get cheated on than live a period of life alone without a partner and with dignity. These people can't be helped.
Should divorce wife. At this point, not as punishment or revenge, but for both their mental health. It sounds like wife was going through stuff and whether people agree she was physically capable of saying 'no' at that the start, by the end there is definitly an essence of coersion that's not comfortable. Staying married, and being forced to be in a relationship that at this point is causing pain and grief to both people is not healthy. I hope op asks for primary custody, and they both can learn to be alone and confident in themselves again. Maybe they could fall back in love and make it work, or maybe they could meet other people, or maybe they could find being single is just better for them. But right now they need to seperate and focus on the son and their own mental health and healing
Eh... not always. You can forgive a cheater, but still not take them back. A few will understand the consequences and no longer date. But if you take them back after forgiving them... no guarantees. 😂
depends on who they are, how they behave, their mental state, etc. Not all cheaters are repeat offenders and are often poor shmucks that got roped into an addiction to attention. If after D-Day they carry on and look for new fuck buddies, then yeah. Guaranteed re-offence. But in this case, where they had a genuine breakdown (staring at a tv whether it is on or off for 2 weeks straight is not something someone sane and mentally home can do) should they recover their sanity, They will never cheat again. Seen it before, Buddy had his fiancee cheat on him with a similar premise, Dude she was banging was married and attractive as hell, dudes wife was a bombshell too. Once her affair fog cleared and she got the whiplash from it suddenly clearing via D-Day, She BROKE, Like full psychological break. She attempted suicide multiple times, her father found her hanging, arms stiff and forced down even as she was turning purple (Now I dont know if you know, But the sheer willpower to DIE it takes to keep yourself from suffocating yourself is insane. thats not faking suicidal mental state, its the definite proof that someone is suicidal) Eventually she got the care she needed through therapy, and he forgave her. I dont live near them anymore but id occasionally see her shopping and some dude would flirt with her, she wouldnt be polite, she wouldnt even say anything. She'd lock up and walk away. One time the fuckwit grabbed her arm and she let out one hell of a scream from what i heard. Not only did she never cheat again, but from what i know, attention from anyone other than my buddy makes her basically flashback. Last I heard she was still in therapy but getting better. It aint an act. She broke, His forgiveness gave her a rope out of the hole she dug, and unlike most Wayward spouses, she didnt hang herself with it, She clung to it for dear life.
I was married to a bi-polar woman for 13 years and I can tell you that its hell. A lot of them don't take meds and just make excuses. Its funny some of the commenters were telling him AP was a predator and such. That's total nonsense. Bi-polar women know what they're doing. OP needs to divorce her and get full custody of his son and quit making excuses for her.
The husband got finessed. You could see her true face the first time he confronted her when she gaslighted him and returned to the affair like nothing happened. Then when caught on camera she binge watched some shows for a week while preparing her "honest" diary and other parts of her plan. Going around and confessing to something your spouse has an actual video of you doing before he does it and adding some unimportant detail like texting some dude for 2 weeks to sound sincere and forthcoming is very logical move especially after you have been planning what to do for a week+ and are not a stereotypical panicking cheater making stupid excuses on the spot. Then take a vacation in mental health facility and smear the AP and bang your hubby is cooked.
My sister is bipolar and adhd and I'm autistic with adhd. Do you know why we don't know what we're doing ? Impulsivity: you can't know what you're doing when you're doing it without giving it any thought. That's why medication therapy and proper countermeasures should be in place. This woman has no excuse for cheating, but there's an explanation and judging by how AP's wife seemed to say there were other women, I subscribe to the predatory theory for sure. Doesn't excuse the cheating, but at least she is trying medication and saying all bipolar people refuse to take them is painting all of them and all neurodivergent people with a broad stroke that hurts perfectly decent and medicated people who don't cheat. I heavily suggest you look into the trauma your bipolar ex gave you with a therapist and I wish you well
@@yngvildrthevoracious That's a bunch of BS. You're trying to make excuses for the cheating. Apparently, you can't read, or you would've seen I said "a lot of them" not all. If you can't understand that then you need to work on reading comprehension. Let me guess, you're a f'minist? 🤣 Quit making excuses for cheating. Just because you're bipolar, adhd, doesn't mean you can't comprehend what you're doing. That's total nonsense. Suggesting therapy for me? Really? Why don't you take your fingers off the keyboard, the adults are talking here.
A male therapist tho. I see too many of these stories with men who are on the fence about their cheating wife seeing a female therapist who convinced them to take them back. Seems to be a running theme of trying to make the wife seem like a victim, which OP is already partly doing by the end.
She’s doing the classic pity strategy of most cheaters but just dialed to 100. She endangered her own son just to get a sympathetic response, utterly disgusting. Mental health isn’t a shield to suddenly use when things go wrong, it’s a part of your everyday existence. She managed to end up single with a 3 year old child, and luckily found a guy nice enough to accept them both. And she throws that away for an ego boost. This woman is beyond saving, get her to sign the papers for custody of the child (she said she’d sign anything) and leave her ass.
You wanted attention from him then gave your body to get it? Then what kind of effort did you do to get your husband attention? I cant- 🤦🏻♀️ she just doesnt love the husband anymore. And dont use depression or bipolar to justify her action. Gosh darn it. I have bipolar and depression but i have never cheated on my SO.
Agreed that whole blaming everything on bipolar and depression is so ubiquitous it makes it seem as if bipolar is a mental issue exclusive to cheaters.
I would agree with you if it was on almost any other video from this kind of channel, but I do not agree on this one here. It's too sad on every aspect and side of the story to say this, it doesn't fit this video in particular.
There’s no excuse for the wife cheating. She was actively having a sexual affair with another man in order to keep his attention. Let that seek in. I’m glad she took accountability, but it doesn’t change the matter of the fact. The husband trying to make up excuses for his wife cheating is annoying af, mental illness or not, she still did what she did. The AP wasn’t some predator who actively knew she had a mental illness & was using it to his advantage. It’s psychotic the way the husband is looking for every excuse just to stay with her. Like, at that point just stfu & just stay with her cause you clearly made up your mind 🙄
On top of that, she was documenting this shit! How in the blue fuck do you knowingly cheat multiple times and write the shit in a journal/diary whatever she wrote in. Someone said cheating is like leaving a stain, it’s gonna always be there. He just needs to leave and focus on himself. If he wants to build a relationship with the son, I guess go for it, but it couldn’t be me…
@Mytelefe I made her feel unloved and its all my fault. Ultimately we made the decision to have the AP stay with us and allow her to bring in whoever else she deems necessary. My only requirement was that she let me know each time so it wasn't considered cheating
Get her to sign a prenup that if she ever does it again that she walks out with nothing that includes the son. Other than that you're between a rock and a hard place.
Should divorce. Trust is broken and neither of the two want a marriage out of pity and guilt. He will always think about it and she will always feel guilty, making them eternally miserable.
@@kafiulhaque8508his mother already showed how neglectfull she can be she abandoned him for her own problems i don't think that kid needs a mother like that
if this is real, and OP takes her back. then all i can say is OP if something happens afterward just know its all your fault, you chose this path despite many people warning you not to do it.
This one is quite interesting. It is easy to just say "she gets what she deserves" but honestly, is that true? A full on mental breakdown, her 'selling' her body for attention (not for money, just the attention), and even OP said she clearly didn't enjoy it in the video he took. This is a truly messed up situation where it isn't easy to judge.
ohhh poor soul, she has depression and needs a coctail of medicine to cope with what she choose to do. one does not just spread her legs wide open by accident, its a rational sentient desition you gotta take KNOWING FULL DAMN WELL that you are doing somthing you should NOT do, specially on your own home, she wanted to get caught i dont care if she's depressed, HE has PTSD, SHE CAUSED HIM a trauma so strong that is brain went into shell shock state. SHE DAMANGED the alleged person she loves SO BAD that he will never EVER recover, you just dont overcome ptsd, you just dont wake up one day and the effects re nowhere to be seen, this is now HIM, this is part of him until he either kills himself or dies, pretty permanent stuff and notice how she talked to EVERY-FUCKING-ONE about this, and he had NO support, he had to wander to wherever luck would take him, and he landed on a place where other men knew how hard life can be on them she DID got what she deserved. lets not sugar coat the fact that she belongs to the streets, and not for power, or money, or status, but for attention now this man could very much develop stocholm syndrome because of what she did. if the roles were reversed and HE was the cheater, you can bet your tushie he would be in SO MUCH SHIT, much more than what she is facing she aint no fucking victim, no fucking "missunderstood" person, she a fucking whore, the only victims here are OP and his son. well hope this serves as a lesson for the kiddo, life is a bitch and he should brace up, shit aint gon get any better
Yes, it's absolutely easy to say she got what she deserved. Cheating is cheating. The fact that she decided to cheat with someone who clearly did not give a shit about her (AP made no effort to comfort her after her breakdown) makes it worse. Her respect for her husband was so low that she cheated with someone like *that*. The only reason OP should even give the smallest crap about her is that the son does not deserve anything from what has happened. It's perfectly understandable if OP divorces but it will definitely be unfortunate for the son. OP is essentially going to have to decide between his and his son's happiness.
Yeah it is, these were the consequences of her actions. While a bit much, at any point in time she could have said no to cheating and gone to a therapist. Instead she went on ahead and in this case the consequences were a nuke.
@@Anonymous-gu2pk Ultimately, no. Still cheating. But this points to her mental state being shit rather than her being a complete asshole. Not forgivable, but you can be more understanding.
It's so sad that this man thought of anything except for taking his son and divorcing that evil psycho. Especially after she completely abused his son because she went total psycho. She doesn't have the right to react that way. it's her own fault, and the fact that she, even after being caught, chose to be selfish and completely melt down to the point of abusing that mans son is disgusting.
Ladies explain this... So you find a man who is willing to raise your children. Most guys aren't willing, I certainly am not. You have dated and you know most guys run to the hills when they find you have children. But this guy comes into your life, betters your life. WHY CHEAT? I know this isn't all women or all single moms, but I have seen it happen time and time again.
Love listening to dramas like these while I walk. But once in awhile, can you do like wholesome shit too cause my mind and heart getting kinda twisted and sad with all these cheating stories whether it be real or fake.
i like to think of these videos as my Alcoholics Anonymous. think about it like this. Women are addictive to men in the same way that Drugs or Alcohol are addictive. in AA, they have people tell their own stories of substence use as a way to remind people of the negative lives they would be living if they relapsed. i view these videos the same way. People telling their experiences with Love or Women, and how negatively their lives were impacted. Im reminded of how much WORSE my life would be if i ever got into a relationship, and how much id be opening myself to getting hurt in the long run. It helps me remind myself to keep myself and my heart closed off and protected. Ive not suffered yet.
That’s rough… one thing I don’t like about this though: the guy calls her alternate partner a predator… I doubt he was aware of her depression etc and o doubt he played that to his advantage. He was doing what people sometimes do, got interested in “greener pastures” and she got hooked. Don’t give her excuses by blaming him. They are both to blame, her being vulnerable or not is irrelevant, she could have come to you for the fulfilment she needed. There will always be other people who are interested. Are they predators too if she cheats with them?
not the real conclusion but here is what probabbly most certainly happend he forgave her, they both "worked it out" he never went back to be himself, she never went to be herself again, eventually she cheated again, or maybe it was him, they both then recognised that they should have gone separated ways long ago, luckly they havent had any other kids, son is now an adult, and he can deal with his parents divorciing better, she goes to be a full on whore, and he never finds love again because you cant just trust anyone at this point maybe at some points one overdoses and the other game ends themselves
i wouldnt be surprised if she cheated again and we simply never heard about it. i mean, honestly, how could this guy come back to reddit (or any other social media) and tell people "yeah, i got cheated on again after i took her back for cheating on me before." he would look like an absolute clown, and i think he knows that. he shouldnt have even made an update post if he wasnt gonna adhere to the advice people were giving him, which was "run fast, not slow." i hope he learned his lesson, but unfortunately, i know he would have to learn it the hard way.
It's funny how she takes away all responsibility for her actions from herself, makes herself out to be the victim and her husband is just collateral damage. What a cop out. Just accept that your decisions have consequences lol
The fact is pretty simple - she's not sorry about any of the ego boosting affairs - she's sorry that she got caught. "Oh no I only wanted these affairs to feel good about myself" - DUH! That's why people have affairs. Hell, you can feel bad about getting extra helpings of ice cream, but at least you're not hurting the other ice cream, and you didn't promise the first ice cream that you'll never have any other, LOL. Again, she's ONLY sorry that she got CAUGHT - all other guilt is just the equivalent of "guilty pleasures" some people get from overeating. The fact that she turned this around to make herself the victim is even more infuriating..... ANYWAY! ... IF this story is true, and she said she'll sign anything - the father should get full custody of the child with only supervised visitations, divorce her on amiable property dividing terms, and tell her "A part of me will always love you and all, but please get someone who's OK with having an open marriage / open relationship / etc. This way your guilty pleasures won't have to betray and hurt other people the way you did to me." PS: Remember the beginning of this story - when he confronted her without evidence, she didn't show ANY guilt, just indignation about being accused. Again, proof she's not sorry about affairs, she's sorry about being caught.
It’s not possible to come back from your wife being raw dogged by another man as sad as this story is. Someone giving your wife attention isn’t an excuse.
Addiction is a scary thing. You may not realize it, but anything can be an addiction. In this case, the attention she got was what satiated her, and after a few tastes, she could hardly function without it. It's a nasty nasty thing that no one walks away from ok.
Sounds like she’s making excuses. No an affair can never become so compulsive the person does not have free will. I guarantee you she either thought up what she was going to say to make you pity her or she just wanted to make it sound less like her fault by making it sound like she had no choice but in reality she did. Everytime she met with a new guy or was flirty you crossed through her mind and she decided to do it anyways
Everybody knows she went around spreading her truth as a preventive measure and the "dairy" was cooked probably during the "apathy" week. You could see her true reaction when she was confronted by the husband without any hard proof which was her gaslighting him and going back to the affair like nothing happened. If binging some tv series for a week on a couch and then taking a vacation in a mental health resort is all that it takes to get away when caught in 4k it is no wonder so many people cheat.
I doubt she has the brains to plot it this big u know her diary and the video where she didn't enjoy it and some other stuff if she was this smart I believe she would have had better things to do
@@miriamkapeller6754oh, but im guessing you DO understand, since you clearly know enough to know hes wrong, dont you? otherwise, dont talk about things you dont understand.
I have a theory that the reaction wasn't just about getting caught. Rather, it was the catalyst that reminded her of all she's done since her aunt died, the way memories of your horrible bender might come flooding back once you wake up sober. I do agree though, empathy all around.
@@dierdred_the_graySo that's what it was! When I was 19, this thirty something YO was chasing me like crazy. She would pay drinks for me, invite me to her hose every other day. The first time I slept with her, I was black out drunk (my first time drinking alcohol) and woke up in her house the next day. I just don't know about the provider, as I didn't even have a car or a good job till 25 YO
on the one hand, giving in to your vanity and escalating things to cheating just to feel "special" is disgusting. just talk to your husband if you're unhappy ffs. but on the other, if she really does have bpad and major depression, i can realte to the feeling of being a passanger in your own body even in the most fucked up situations. the amounts of bridges i've burtn and people i've slighted before i got help with my bpad makes me drown in shame and guilt even more than a decade later. so i dunno. these two will need years of therapy, each of them, no matter if they stay together.
I hate it when people that have been cheated on consider reconciliation. Your partner chose to cheat on you. They chose to stray from the relationship. There is no point in staying in a relationship if they chose to move away from it.
So the story is very intense and all that, it sucks it happened, so on and so forth...but the OP's interaction with the AP's wife just got me, LOL. Like, she is _also_ someone who has been cheated on, so you think there would be a mutual understanding between the two of them but instead he's all like, "Damn, woman, you are annoying as hell," 🤣. I don't know why that got me.
I dont think i could ever get back with a woman like this, but this is the first time ive heard of a cheater with receipts 😅, but ill give her props for coming clean without having to fish out half truths....
Man, this is the one story I want everyone to heal. Not really get back together, but for everyone to heal. Shits actually sad for everyone involved. More for the father and son, but god damn... That was truly how it looks when someone is wracked with guilt so bad they give up on life, but they dont take the cowards way out. On top of that, she didnt make excuses to anything. She actually has remorse. Every other AP story I heard hasnt come close to this level of remorse and apology. This the kinda shit that fundamentally changes people
I'll be the first to say "Never go back to someone who cheated on you" but this woman feels different than usual case's. I genuinely hope (Mostly for her husband and the child) that she redeems herself to the best of her ability and that she doesn't just continue cheating if he ever gives her that second chance.
In this case I think that the best decision is to downgrade her into a gf. Just because you divorced doesn't mean you have to leave each other. She has to understand that her actions have consequences and apparently being a wife is too stable for her mindset.
@@demonvictim Her reaction seems to suggest that she knows quite well though, being downgraded to girlfriend would probably mean little to her compared to the damage she knows she inflicted. Honestly I wish we just had the answers so that we could fix these kind of situations easier or prevent them all together. Its so damn disheartening.
@arcadius3257 it's also funny how the affair partner gets the best part in all of this, he got ass but clearly wasn't there when op wife was falling into a deep depression. In these cases, the affair partners are always M.I.A and I've read enough reddit posts to see a common pattern
@@danteerskine7678 Yep, probably off finding a new married target to have an affair with. Some people have absolutely no shame and actually get off on ruining marriages.
@@arcadius3257 the downgrade is to put her on her best behavior and to make sure she knows he is one foot out. He wants to be there for the son and she is either average or below average in looks considering how he compare to ap wife and knows that op is a catch. So she has to make him want her back in the time period before the kid goes to college and maybe op will cheat on her just to feel better or not but that has no basis anymore since if you've been cheated on there is no longer any striking need to fight off people who want you.
Good lord. His ancestors were all expelled from Valhalla and banished to Helheim. The most simptastic man ever, lol. If Sweden or Norway were pulled into war, the nations would crumble.
@@YouArentSlick You get it. You definitely get it. If someone makes themselves a doormat don't be surprised you'll get treated like one. She knew him very well better than he knew her. Then he went back and I wouldn't be surprised it happens all over again since the insanity plea worked on him 🙄
You have to respect the fact that she: 1. Was completely transparent by giving him access to her diary and logins. 2. Sincerely apologized without making any excuses. 3. Agreed to sign any legal documents.
It's an act. It's all an act. She's doing this all this for attention. That's why she cheated, that's why she's gone into depression. When it all goes back to normal, she'll cheat again because she didn't get the attention. If he gets back with her, he will regret it for sure.
Bro was smoking some exotic copium at the end. How are you justifying the cheating when your wife isn’t? She didn’t even ask to get back together, she doesn’t even want to talk to you because she pities you and your simp tendencies. “Should I leave her” bruh she left you, have some self worth. If this was about your son you would have simply divorced and gotten full custody due to her neglect, you’re fighting to keep the problem around
Yeah if you live life as a doormat, don’t be surprised when people walk over you. He loved her son too much and she saw him as a beta cuck. That’s why I would never date a single mother and advise others to do the same. Sadly my lil brother didn’t listen and his wife cheats on him and her son that he took care of since he was 2 years old wanted to fight him over his moms cheating. Go figure right
AP needs to know that people forgive but can never forget. Unless you will have permanent amnesia. Or else until you die you'll never forget this stain. Ever, but it's his choice.
I see why some of these guys get cheated on.🙄 Where are their balls? They're too nice showing that they're doormats. They really try to work with the cheater or question themselves for how betrayed they feel like they're the bad guy. Weird asf. No women will respect you if you don't respect yourself.
This is the first time I feel bad for the cheater... by the sounds of it, her long-term depression had left her so dopamine deprived she sought them out almost on autopilot.... something akin to a split personality that only reunited once she watched the CCTV. I am not condoning the cheating at all, but it is the first time in while that I cannot comfidently say she knew what she was doing.
Nah, this affair took time, there's no way she didn't know what she was doing. I'd understand this reasoning if it was actually just a one night stand.
@@brightiris it honestly sounds like her higher brain function hasn't been there since her aunt died, as if she's lost in a dream or living in an out of body experience. So while she might be aware of what she was doing, that higher function of morality and accountability in her mind would have been shut down. In that case, she would have a quiet version of temporary insanity.
@@Maninawig So now that she got caught, only then her "higher brain function" suddenly worked? That's utter bs. She literally said she herself CHASED that man after the AP turned cold.
Her condition is called WH0r3 She is extremely faking it because she was caught and is only sorry because she was caught. My xhusband pulled emo bs like this until one day he said if you leave me I'll unalive myself so I said here are our divorce documents sign and finish ur $h!t show for someone else.
His final rant about thinking his current wife wouldn't cheat again felt like desperation. I fully believe she thinks her depression caused this and she thinks she will never cheat again, but if it caused it once, the same situation could repeat. I do not believe for a second she is incapable of cheating on him again.
Imagine, cheating on the man you supposedly love, then when he leaves you like he should..... you literally go insane Either that's the definition of a guilty conscience or I don't know what it is.🤨
Bringing the person you’re cheating with into your home adds another layer of cruelty.
That's the one that gets me. Why, if you are going to cheat, do something like bring them into a place where your partner has ANY access and some form of control? At least a crappy, low rent motel is harder for them to get video of you cheating.
@@murdock94 It’s good that these cheaters are so incredibly cheap. Makes catching them a lot easier lol
The answer to both you and Murdock can be simply 1 of 2 things, Option 1: cheating can be like getting high and the risker it is the more of a rush you get and the more you get away with it the higher your high gets or Option 2: your in so deep into what reddit calls "The Affair Fog" that you can't honestly tell what is right or wrong nor what is moral or not anymore
You sound mad experienced 🤨 with that cheating stuff
@@tyreesesolomon8907 ha! I've never been in a relationship and I've only ever known kissed 1 girl, I just listen to a lot of Reddit while working out and I a unquie way of understanding the human thought process
The confession note she wrote is probably the most in depth honest confession I’ve heard from the adulterer. Not pushing him to do what they want and recognize that they did something evil.
That's the trick. She is pushing him away to make him miss her. The reason why he had that unconscious desire to watch the video again and again is his subconsciente reminding him what has happened. How he felt.
Denying his visit is preventing him from closure, so he is still open up to recon. She might be depressed now, because when Narcissistic persons lost their attention, then the world ends for them. And trust me. She is Narcissistic.
@@TheAsmodhashe left her son without food for days and practically abused herself for weeks. What makes you think she is in a mental state capable of abuse?
Do you think her being diagnosed with depression and being in a hospital is also some cheap trick?
@@thecolorblue1635 Are you stupid? She left her son without food for days? That's abuse. It could very well be a cheap trick.
@@thecolorblue1635I think that it’s possible to fake anything to get your way if you have absolutely no morals or shame, that being said those types of people are very rare and it’s more likely she actually was fucked up over everything rather than acting for salvation
@@TheAsmodha Bro what? She risked having her kid taken away and being put in jail for child abuse... to prove a point to him? If she was capable of that level of cruelty he would have noticed it before, not particularly with him but with other things/people she wasn't fond of.
It's kinda funny when the cheating ex wives fell into deep depression, their affair partners that they prioritize so much are nowhere to be found
Chad/Tyrone's will always ditch them when things go bad
Well not in this case tho as the wife had developed it after her Aunt died.
It's the same thing for the big macho men who cheats that end up a blubbering crying mess or pathetic beggar. 😂
Yeah you are right, depression is super funny and we should all have a great laugh about it...
To quote (poorly) a smart guy, the difference between love and lust becomes obvious when it's time to make some sacrifices (time, effort, short-term happiness )
Lowkey, that is probably the best apology for cheating letter I’ve heard.
Real
High key
Honestly, I'm of the mind that infidelity is an immediate end of the relationship but this situation might be the only thing that could potentially make me reconsider. If a kid were not involved I'd be out there yesterday as I'm sure everyone would but this whole thing is just sad. This is probably the only story like this I've heard where the cheating spouse seemed to immediately recognize what they did was wrong, suffered for it in a hell of their own making, and more importantly didn't try to buy back the life they just threw away. Ironically, her essentially accepting that her old life is completely destroyed and that she did it herself probably increases the chances of her actually being able to get some of it back.
@@TheAndroidNextDoor eh, there was another one on this channel where OPs wife got pregnant and he didn't find out the kid wasn't his until 15 years down the line. Turns out the wife was roped and her mind coped with incident by tricking herself into thinking it was a mistake on her part. This was backed up a therapist and by the guy that forced himself on her confessing that he did it on his death bed basically. There are some instances where reconciliation is possible but those are few and far between.
@@TheAndroidNextDoor I second this. That sounded extremely sincere and extremely remorseful, more than anything I’ve ever seen. Usually the cheetah will blame deflect, and hold their partner, accountable, or friends, or life, events, or the AP, etc. And usually they do it multiple times with multiple different people before they are caught, but it genuinely seem like she only did it with that one other guy and the reason that she described. The mental health played a huge factor, so I have some understanding and empathy, but if I was him, I still would walk away. I don’t care what the excuses, she had a husband and a son. A husband who took care of a child that wasn’t even his for over a decade and she couldn’t put her selfish needs aside? She deserves nothing from him and I’m glad he sees it that way, but he probably went back to her, that’s why it ended where it does.
The fact the OP was getting distracted writing about a random gym he joined makes this feel more real than others
It’s not I’m pretty sure it’s ai because it has a lot of phrases that are in almost all of them
@@Hello_1478 what are some of the phrases that AI uses?
@@Phoenix_Dude09the tension was palpable; I don't know snazzy the future holds; etc.
@@Phoenix_Dude09bro had no script😂
For me, it's the fact that it's so messy that makes it real. People like to write a beginning, middle, and end where someone is the villian and someone else is the hero. This is just really sad
And this, boys and girls, is why you should always learn to love yourself first.
Because if you truly love yourself you won't end up sabotaging yourself just so you can get some attention and "love" from others.
I don't think it's about loving yourself first. I didn't love myself until after I met my fiance, and I'm head of heels in love with him! He loved me when my self hate was at its highest and helped me learn to love myself.
@@tricjoseph9879 Wait, I think you're missing the point, tho. It's great you had that experience. I'm glad you are the type of person who can learn through others and evolve socially (:! Congrats on the relationship, too btw! However, sadly, not everyone has that ability or has the same experiences with partners. ): Some people (especially those who are dealing with childhood trauma on various levels) may struggle with self-acceptance, internal recognition, or other forms of general self-image issues. The thing is, learning self-love is something that helps us triumph over those difficulties and improve our mental image and ability to respond to our environment with self-respect. Learning self-respect also helps mature your moral compass and improves your decision-making skills. Learning to love yourself before getting into a relationship arms you with a list of advantages such as: avoiding red flags, confidence in yourself to know when someone's gaslighting you, to see your partner's actions without insecurities clouding your sense of judgment, improved ability to communicate needs without fear, less anxiety, etc.
What works for one person may not work for others, but that's why learning self-love first can help A LOT of people avoid heartbreak and other forms of trauma.
People love differently and that doesn't always make them prioritise loved one and not think of consequences of their actions. People are flawed creatures.
Or... Maybe this should be used as an example to be a loyal and honest person, rather that a piece of trash.
Yes, let's totally disregard the fact that she has a diagnosed disease that contributed to the situation, had she "loved herself first" her brain wouldn't have the chemical inbalance that let her into depression and she wouldn't have cheated because of those thoughts as a result...
In a normal scenario, I'd agree 100% with you. However, we are dealing with a mental illness here - diagnosed by professionals, she's still being treated for it. From what we know, it's impossible to tell how much her actions were influenced by her illness, thus defeating the point of your argument. Don't get me wrong, regardless of the reason the fact is that she cheated and permanetly damaged her relationship, probably beyond repair. I only disagree with how simplified you made the situation to be.
I feel bad for OP but i feel especially bad for the son it's not his fault his mother is a bad person but he had to deal with her breakdown.
he is a fool who is being used, he should divorce her the moment he finds out she is cheating her reason are for her and for her only, she cheats leave does not matter why she did it
@@thematrix2661divorce is a process you can’t divorce the second you find out and he’s not a Fool for feeling he had been betrayed and needing to leave.
@@thematrix2661we talking about the son homedog what
@@thematrix2661 did you read the comment?
You really should feel bad about OP. Bcs emotionally-weak-man was about to take the cheater back
The guy basicly doesnt have a backbone and seems to round his life on his marriege and bad things happens when you dont have a life about yourself
Fun thats cheaters tend to say they "lost control". So, cheating is the new the sims?
Even in sims they don’t autonomously cheat with someone that isn’t their partner. You, as the player, have to actively MAKE your sim cheat, even then they feel BAD about it. Sims are more loyal than this woman 😂
I hate that excuse, I absolutely loathe it. It is - be it consciously or subconsciously - designed to liberate the cheater of guilt, accountability and responsibility. They couldn't help it, you see! They're actually the real victims here! They lost control and couldn't stop it from happening! MY AFFAIR PARTNER MADE ME DO IT, HE'S THE BAD GUY!
It's psychological self-preservation on their end, they do everything they can to minimize the damage, to limit their accountability. They first and foremost try to protect themselves, over their partner. Even when they're wailing on about how they're scum who don't deserve their partner, the true victim of their cheating, they still fall back on the "I lost control, I couldn't stop it" narrative. Between every damn apology they squeeze in excuses or justifications, which clearly shows you that the apology isn't 100% sincere.
@@jasminedavis3030but you can get other sims to cheat on their spouses super easily lol
Played sims while watching this. W comment
Human being s are very compulsive creatures aka they do very many things without thinking about it or without choosing to they just do it so it is true that a lot of the cheaters just lose control
I am bipolar and all I can say is your illness is not your fault but it is your responsibility. Your illness does not erase the actual hurt you cause people.
Hope she gets herself in order so she can take care of her son. Her son needs her.
Even tought certain behaviours occur due to the illness OP has every right to feel what he is feeling and even leave his wife. Her actions still happened and hurt OP.
Edit: spelling error.
This needs to be emphasized more
Even tho I agree with you, take in count that her bipolarity was undiagnosed until after the affair, I don't think you can make yourself responsible of something you don't know you have.
@@luxzord865 emotions are not a reason to cheat
Thank you for this. As someone who lives with seemingly lifelong depression, it's so frustrating to see people blame their depression for issues in their life but never do anything to improve it.
@@luxzord865 Yes I somewhat agree, but still, she did cause hurt and harm to people. I have hurt people when undiagnosed and when having a manic episodes after the diagnosis since medicine doesnt complitely erase the possibility to have those only helps to manage and prevent and when the symptoms start they may help to dodge it. Also after diagnosis the person with the illness should practise to pinpoint if new episode is starting for example i tend to have too mutch creativity that i constantly without stop draw, dont sleep mutch, spend too mutch money, have overly elevated mood and many more. And this is just the start. Also the ill individual may deny that they are staring an episode if they are too far gone so it is important to have close ones who know so they can help and medical support system. I personally tend to deny since I feel like im "cured" somehow since I feel wery happy.
However when you hurt somebody you did hurt them. There is something more to it when the person did it because of an illness but it did still happen and the person who was hurt by the other party gets to feel the feelings they are feeling and gets to break up with the other person if they wish to do so. Illness is an factor should be taken in count somewhat but it does not erase the thing that happened. Both have to be able to live with it.
The short answer is that OP (in my opinion) should either try separation or divorce. By the end he's clearly afraid of what the future will hold and he wants to go back to the way things were before. Things will never go back, though, especially since his relationship had already been broken for years. His best bet is to focus on his son and himself, and revisit this once he's healed. It will take years. His wife might not ever get to be a mom again, and his son might never want her to be his mom again. But she's shown that she can't be responsible for her son, between the bad choices and the mental breakdown that followed. Focusing on himself and his son will show his son how to healthily manage a crisis like this. Going back to the wife will hurt his son in so many ways.
The way he gaslights himself into being in relationship with her is gold standard. We all know that he will be with her lol.
This is an old story, but I guess I disagree. If I was advising him I would tell him to have her sign a Post Nup that would be 100% in his favor. Next up she agrees that he adopts the boy. Next up would be the removal of all social media. Then there would be a lot of others things like a lie detector etc. My reasoning is this. As it stands now he could get screwed in divorce and never see the boy again. He doesn't want that to happen and he could leverage her now to protect himself in the future. He can also test the waters to see if she is really committed to reconciliation and if he can handle it as well. This would take some serious time, but the reality is that divorce is horrible and he stated the fact about other women out there.
I bet OP thinks he's some masculine man now going back to his cheating wife. He doesn't love himself and that alone is why he will fail his son. His greatest asset of a father is saving his son from his own mother. That's it. His version of being a man is not loving himself and allowing such a disrespectful act of deception. Poor kid. His mom is evil and his dad is a weak simp.
I don't know how I feel about this one
It's just tragic on every perspective.
yeah me neither. obviously cheater sucks,but it almost sounds like she’s not aware of anything. at times op comes off as volatile and violent. i just feel sad for the kid being stuck in that situation.
I feel good about this one. Like people had problems and life made them aware of it. And then they started to hurt, make decisions and try to be better. I like how OP really thought not only about his healing but for all people he care about too.
@julesr6965 idk he doesn't come off as violent to me. Just unstable. If he was violent I think the wife and mum who know him personally would be afraid of him beating the wife to death.
@@tottoro7830Good point! Most of these posts the cheater has little to no remorse and will try to gaslight the OP or use them as a scapegoat. But in this one you can't really jump to "divorce her!" Mode knowing the circumstances. I am not justifying the cheating or saying that mental illness is an excuse. As mental illness is no excuse to hurt others. Ever. I'm honestly sick and tired of people using that excuse to steamroll others tbh. But considering her actions afterwards? Like cheaters don't usually confess to everyone they know about their dirty little secret. Like that's not a norm for them. I think she wasn't brave enough to tell him in person and was banking on someone ratting her out. I listen to all these stories and think "Don't fall for it op! They're full of it!". But in this one her actions following the cheating don't align with the norm of cheaters. Such as remorse. I think she needs to work on herself and learn to be stronger for her husband and son. She's hurt them tremendously and knows it. But beating herself up this bad isn't going to solve anything. Yeah she apologized. Yeah she's sorry (maybe?). So her next to step should be to TAKE ACTION. Not grovel and kiss his feet. She should stand up, look him in the eye, and help him heal! If you're going to own up to what you do and are remorseful you should also prove you want to better yourself.
As for OP, he has a golden heart and it's a pity she shattered it. I truly wish the best for him and his family. He is thoughtful and self aware. It's obvious he does a lot of introspection which is a great tool for healing. (Personal experience). I hope he finds his peace and has it protected for the rest of his days.
As for the son, I hope he realizes how much OP loves him and never forgets it. I hope when OP grows old and feeble that the son cares for him the way a loving elder should be cared for. And I hope when he gets older he finds a girl that treats him better than his mother treated OP.
This is bittersweet all around. Yeah they got hurt but they are bettering themselves. And I find that to be the most important thing to do regardless how your life is going.
Imagine he sent a note back to her that said "i ain't readin allat"
"bro really wrote a whole essay for this 💀"
He really took "the beatings will continue until morale improves" to heart.
Gotta leave her. That footage will never leave you. Its happened to me(divorced her) and even now 8yrs later it still plays in my mind.
Iam finding patterns strongly believe that's she a sociopath and manipulator ,,,the fact that she starved her son for two days is unacceptable....OP should just take his son and move countries ..man I've seen things like these many times where the woman goes through guilt and ends up killing the husband and their child
She got the consequences she deserved, unfortunately the kid was dragged with her. Op must NEVER get back with her as it's not purely pity, have her admitted to fix herself and maybe if she can handle it, in the future be mutually stable paternal figures
you can pretty much 100% guarantee he will get back with her. The last 5 minutes were painful to listen to. Literally just the guy gaslighting himself into all the reasons why her cheating is acceptable and he shouldn't expect anything better. "the chances of her cheating now are less than the chances of a new partner cheating!". Like Jesus Christ. His wife refuses to even talk to him and this is what he's like, so imagine how easy he is to manipulate once she begins a conversation.
@@CosmicAeon The second he referred to her as a victim that just happened to be caught by a predator everything was over. I must give it to her though she was very quick on the poor devastated wife act and was one step ahead of him the entire story like going around confessing before he could spread the word or preparing the super honest diary. You could see how truly honest and broken up about it she was when he first confronted her and she was gaslighting him because he didn't have solid evidence and returned to the affair like nothing happened because she thought she got away with it.
He is doing all sorts of excuses for her, he will defo be back...he's weak man after all, with scarcity mentality...something what is called SIMP
The hell @Mytelefe ? Why are you assuming that it's immediately some intricate scheme to win him over, completely ignoring the possibility that she might actually be sorry. Not everyone completely agrees with what they are doing; If you don't believe me, try looking up cognitive dissonance or addiction. And I say this AS A POSSIBILITY, not certainty.
@@Jhopmemes people who have enough empathy to have a breakdown over the way they've treated others also tend to have the empathy not to cheat multiple times and destroy their family in the first place. It's a fair assumption. A long term affair is not exactly something that happens by accident.
There are so many people who mistake the residual feelings for someone and the memory of a relationship for love. You dont love that person anymore (at least you shouldn't) you are just feeling that feeling you get after a part of your life crumbles, its like the desire to get back what you lost. You love the version of that person before you find out who they really are. You miss the relationship you used to have.
Love doesn't exist for people who would destroy someone elses entire world for their own selfish desires.
I’ve heard so many people say they idolize their exes. They forget all the horrible things, focus on only the positives that existed in the relationship, truly believe they missed out on something in the relationship and want to go back. I’m the opposite, my ex was awful. We had some good times over the years but all I can remember are the horrible things (cheating, lying, mental and emotional abuse), there’s just NOTHING to idolize with him and I’m so thankful I finally walked away. I stayed single for almost 5 years to fully heal from everything he did, then met my awesome husband that is everything my ex could never be
I can't believe op wanted to reconcile at the end, everything in the world is screaming at him not to
At the end he's just scared. It's not uncommon for people to feel like he did in these situations. He can't see what the future holds, but he knows what he used to have. He's afraid to face the unknown, and afraid to be even more hurt than he is now. It's tough, but I do think the best thing for him is to at minimum separate if not divorce. Even if he doesn't find another partner, he has his son. Time will show that having his son can partially fill the hole in his heart, and he'll be able to fill the rest with self care. Then maybe some day, he'll find love again and have the courage to try.
some men just cannot handle being alone or on their own.
its unfortunate, but we cant save someone who doesnt want to be saved.
all we can do is remind him that if he gets cheated on again, its purely his own fault. because hes the one who decided to take her back.
@@idkissausername1667 I absolutely agree with you on this fact. A lot of men and women too, simply remain in a toxic/cheating relationship just because they are scared of being alone after getting seperated. They'd rather get cheated on than live a period of life alone without a partner and with dignity. These people can't be helped.
Trying to reconcile is crazy to me . This man needs to take his son and run for the hills
What happens when you're Weak and Gullible
It's not his son so he can't take him.
@@qlof Well said. Social services can find an adoptive family to take the son; a good family.
@@qlof The wife said she'd sign anything he puts in front of her. He could put that to the test.
Should divorce wife. At this point, not as punishment or revenge, but for both their mental health.
It sounds like wife was going through stuff and whether people agree she was physically capable of saying 'no' at that the start, by the end there is definitly an essence of coersion that's not comfortable.
Staying married, and being forced to be in a relationship that at this point is causing pain and grief to both people is not healthy. I hope op asks for primary custody, and they both can learn to be alone and confident in themselves again.
Maybe they could fall back in love and make it work, or maybe they could meet other people, or maybe they could find being single is just better for them. But right now they need to seperate and focus on the son and their own mental health and healing
This is probably the best response on why he should divorce her that I could find in this comment section
Once you forgive a cheater, they cheat again.
F*cking A.
Eh... not always. You can forgive a cheater, but still not take them back. A few will understand the consequences and no longer date. But if you take them back after forgiving them... no guarantees. 😂
@@lillia2479yes
depends on who they are, how they behave, their mental state, etc. Not all cheaters are repeat offenders and are often poor shmucks that got roped into an addiction to attention. If after D-Day they carry on and look for new fuck buddies, then yeah. Guaranteed re-offence. But in this case, where they had a genuine breakdown (staring at a tv whether it is on or off for 2 weeks straight is not something someone sane and mentally home can do) should they recover their sanity, They will never cheat again.
Seen it before, Buddy had his fiancee cheat on him with a similar premise, Dude she was banging was married and attractive as hell, dudes wife was a bombshell too. Once her affair fog cleared and she got the whiplash from it suddenly clearing via D-Day, She BROKE, Like full psychological break. She attempted suicide multiple times, her father found her hanging, arms stiff and forced down even as she was turning purple (Now I dont know if you know, But the sheer willpower to DIE it takes to keep yourself from suffocating yourself is insane. thats not faking suicidal mental state, its the definite proof that someone is suicidal)
Eventually she got the care she needed through therapy, and he forgave her. I dont live near them anymore but id occasionally see her shopping and some dude would flirt with her, she wouldnt be polite, she wouldnt even say anything. She'd lock up and walk away. One time the fuckwit grabbed her arm and she let out one hell of a scream from what i heard.
Not only did she never cheat again, but from what i know, attention from anyone other than my buddy makes her basically flashback. Last I heard she was still in therapy but getting better. It aint an act. She broke, His forgiveness gave her a rope out of the hole she dug, and unlike most Wayward spouses, she didnt hang herself with it, She clung to it for dear life.
No?
He is cooked, already doubting a life without her in the end. Actually tragic
I was married to a bi-polar woman for 13 years and I can tell you that its hell. A lot of them don't take meds and just make excuses. Its funny some of the commenters were telling him AP was a predator and such. That's total nonsense. Bi-polar women know what they're doing. OP needs to divorce her and get full custody of his son and quit making excuses for her.
Agreed. He should have taken photos and videos of the dirty apartment as court evidence to get full custody of his son.
The kid isn't his. He got cucked into raising another man's son.
The husband got finessed. You could see her true face the first time he confronted her when she gaslighted him and returned to the affair like nothing happened. Then when caught on camera she binge watched some shows for a week while preparing her "honest" diary and other parts of her plan. Going around and confessing to something your spouse has an actual video of you doing before he does it and adding some unimportant detail like texting some dude for 2 weeks to sound sincere and forthcoming is very logical move especially after you have been planning what to do for a week+ and are not a stereotypical panicking cheater making stupid excuses on the spot. Then take a vacation in mental health facility and smear the AP and bang your hubby is cooked.
My sister is bipolar and adhd and I'm autistic with adhd. Do you know why we don't know what we're doing ? Impulsivity: you can't know what you're doing when you're doing it without giving it any thought. That's why medication therapy and proper countermeasures should be in place. This woman has no excuse for cheating, but there's an explanation and judging by how AP's wife seemed to say there were other women, I subscribe to the predatory theory for sure. Doesn't excuse the cheating, but at least she is trying medication and saying all bipolar people refuse to take them is painting all of them and all neurodivergent people with a broad stroke that hurts perfectly decent and medicated people who don't cheat. I heavily suggest you look into the trauma your bipolar ex gave you with a therapist and I wish you well
@@yngvildrthevoracious That's a bunch of BS. You're trying to make excuses for the cheating. Apparently, you can't read, or you would've seen I said "a lot of them" not all. If you can't understand that then you need to work on reading comprehension. Let me guess, you're a f'minist? 🤣 Quit making excuses for cheating. Just because you're bipolar, adhd, doesn't mean you can't comprehend what you're doing. That's total nonsense. Suggesting therapy for me? Really? Why don't you take your fingers off the keyboard, the adults are talking here.
this story breaks my heart, especially about the son :( i hope the son and OP are ok now
I hear a worrying lack of the word “therapy” from the OP. I hope he got a therapist and went over all those questions he has with them.
thats what he was talking about with IC, I think its the same thing.
A male therapist tho.
I see too many of these stories with men who are on the fence about their cheating wife seeing a female therapist who convinced them to take them back.
Seems to be a running theme of trying to make the wife seem like a victim, which OP is already partly doing by the end.
I remember this story from like years ago, did not know their were more updates, I just remember him talking about the fighting club and that was it
She’s doing the classic pity strategy of most cheaters but just dialed to 100.
She endangered her own son just to get a sympathetic response, utterly disgusting. Mental health isn’t a shield to suddenly use when things go wrong, it’s a part of your everyday existence.
She managed to end up single with a 3 year old child, and luckily found a guy nice enough to accept them both. And she throws that away for an ego boost.
This woman is beyond saving, get her to sign the papers for custody of the child (she said she’d sign anything) and leave her ass.
You wanted attention from him then gave your body to get it? Then what kind of effort did you do to get your husband attention? I cant- 🤦🏻♀️ she just doesnt love the husband anymore. And dont use depression or bipolar to justify her action. Gosh darn it. I have bipolar and depression but i have never cheated on my SO.
Agreed that whole blaming everything on bipolar and depression is so ubiquitous it makes it seem as if bipolar is a mental issue exclusive to cheaters.
She already confirmed that she liked AP she said he's handsome.
As always, cheaters feel no remorse or regret about cheating. They only regret the consequences.
Agreed
She was extremely sorry for it tho ?
@@tomoyakun9294 Like all cheaters, she only stopped and felt regret after she was exposed. So no, she's only sorry that she's been caught.
I would agree with you if it was on almost any other video from this kind of channel, but I do not agree on this one here. It's too sad on every aspect and side of the story to say this, it doesn't fit this video in particular.
@@tomoyakun9294She was extremely sorry... Extremely sorry, that she got caught
There’s no excuse for the wife cheating. She was actively having a sexual affair with another man in order to keep his attention. Let that seek in. I’m glad she took accountability, but it doesn’t change the matter of the fact. The husband trying to make up excuses for his wife cheating is annoying af, mental illness or not, she still did what she did. The AP wasn’t some predator who actively knew she had a mental illness & was using it to his advantage. It’s psychotic the way the husband is looking for every excuse just to stay with her. Like, at that point just stfu & just stay with her cause you clearly made up your mind 🙄
On top of that, she was documenting this shit!
How in the blue fuck do you knowingly cheat multiple times and write the shit in a journal/diary whatever she wrote in. Someone said cheating is like leaving a stain, it’s gonna always be there. He just needs to leave and focus on himself. If he wants to build a relationship with the son, I guess go for it, but it couldn’t be me…
Exact reason she made no excuse
Bro I see your comments on these types of videos everywhere
Jesus that ain’t no mother
Doormat: asks for advice from people on reddit
Also Doormat: ultimately I'll do whatever I want and feel is right
Doormat: my cheating wife was a victim in all of this
@Mytelefe I made her feel unloved and its all my fault. Ultimately we made the decision to have the AP stay with us and allow her to bring in whoever else she deems necessary. My only requirement was that she let me know each time so it wasn't considered cheating
Get her to sign a prenup that if she ever does it again that she walks out with nothing that includes the son. Other than that you're between a rock and a hard place.
I think those are called “post-nup”
I don't think u can do that with the son as op is not his biological father.
Should divorce. Trust is broken and neither of the two want a marriage out of pity and guilt. He will always think about it and she will always feel guilty, making them eternally miserable.
You can never trust a cheater
Divorce her. That’s it and that’s that. He needs to divorce her.
I know what you are saying but the problem with divorce is she's unstable she could even comite suicide then the kid will lose his mother
okay she deserves it imo@@kafiulhaque8508
@@kafiulhaque8508his mother already showed how neglectfull she can be she abandoned him for her own problems i don't think that kid needs a mother like that
@@kafiulhaque8508stop
@@kafiulhaque8508after a divorce, you aren’t owed a thing by your ex
if this is real, and OP takes her back. then all i can say is OP if something happens afterward just know its all your fault, you chose this path despite many people warning you not to do it.
Was a horrible situation and got even worse near the end when op started talking like a beta bob and called her a "victim".
This one is quite interesting. It is easy to just say "she gets what she deserves" but honestly, is that true? A full on mental breakdown, her 'selling' her body for attention (not for money, just the attention), and even OP said she clearly didn't enjoy it in the video he took. This is a truly messed up situation where it isn't easy to judge.
ohhh poor soul, she has depression and needs a coctail of medicine to cope with what she choose to do. one does not just spread her legs wide open by accident, its a rational sentient desition you gotta take KNOWING FULL DAMN WELL that you are doing somthing you should NOT do, specially on your own home, she wanted to get caught
i dont care if she's depressed, HE has PTSD, SHE CAUSED HIM a trauma so strong that is brain went into shell shock state. SHE DAMANGED the alleged person she loves SO BAD that he will never EVER recover, you just dont overcome ptsd, you just dont wake up one day and the effects re nowhere to be seen, this is now HIM, this is part of him until he either kills himself or dies, pretty permanent stuff
and notice how she talked to EVERY-FUCKING-ONE about this, and he had NO support, he had to wander to wherever luck would take him, and he landed on a place where other men knew how hard life can be on them
she DID got what she deserved. lets not sugar coat the fact that she belongs to the streets, and not for power, or money, or status, but for attention
now this man could very much develop stocholm syndrome because of what she did. if the roles were reversed and HE was the cheater, you can bet your tushie he would be in SO MUCH SHIT, much more than what she is facing
she aint no fucking victim, no fucking "missunderstood" person, she a fucking whore, the only victims here are OP and his son. well hope this serves as a lesson for the kiddo, life is a bitch and he should brace up, shit aint gon get any better
Yes, it's absolutely easy to say she got what she deserved.
Cheating is cheating. The fact that she decided to cheat with someone who clearly did not give a shit about her (AP made no effort to comfort her after her breakdown) makes it worse. Her respect for her husband was so low that she cheated with someone like *that*.
The only reason OP should even give the smallest crap about her is that the son does not deserve anything from what has happened. It's perfectly understandable if OP divorces but it will definitely be unfortunate for the son. OP is essentially going to have to decide between his and his son's happiness.
Yeah it is, these were the consequences of her actions. While a bit much, at any point in time she could have said no to cheating and gone to a therapist.
Instead she went on ahead and in this case the consequences were a nuke.
Does it matter if you're cheating for physical pleasure or for psychological pleasure?
@@Anonymous-gu2pk Ultimately, no. Still cheating. But this points to her mental state being shit rather than her being a complete asshole. Not forgivable, but you can be more understanding.
It's so sad that this man thought of anything except for taking his son and divorcing that evil psycho. Especially after she completely abused his son because she went total psycho. She doesn't have the right to react that way. it's her own fault, and the fact that she, even after being caught, chose to be selfish and completely melt down to the point of abusing that mans son is disgusting.
Ladies explain this...
So you find a man who is willing to raise your children. Most guys aren't willing, I certainly am not. You have dated and you know most guys run to the hills when they find you have children. But this guy comes into your life, betters your life. WHY CHEAT?
I know this isn't all women or all single moms, but I have seen it happen time and time again.
The 80-20 rule I guess
Smh cheaters always wanna be surprised when their spouse leaves them
Love listening to dramas like these while I walk. But once in awhile, can you do like wholesome shit too cause my mind and heart getting kinda twisted and sad with all these cheating stories whether it be real or fake.
They sometimes have cute stories but they really need a full video of wholesome stories
Im kinda in same situation too and discovering new trust issues that I never had
Man I think I'm listening to these cheating kind stories too much and need the good ones some times😅
i like to think of these videos as my Alcoholics Anonymous.
think about it like this. Women are addictive to men in the same way that Drugs or Alcohol are addictive.
in AA, they have people tell their own stories of substence use as a way to remind people of the negative lives they would be living if they relapsed.
i view these videos the same way. People telling their experiences with Love or Women, and how negatively their lives were impacted.
Im reminded of how much WORSE my life would be if i ever got into a relationship, and how much id be opening myself to getting hurt in the long run.
It helps me remind myself to keep myself and my heart closed off and protected.
Ive not suffered yet.
This man got so mad he went to a cage fight 😂😂😂😂😂😂 this made me CACCKKLLLLEEEEEEEE
That’s rough… one thing I don’t like about this though: the guy calls her alternate partner a predator…
I doubt he was aware of her depression etc and o doubt he played that to his advantage. He was doing what people sometimes do, got interested in “greener pastures” and she got hooked. Don’t give her excuses by blaming him. They are both to blame, her being vulnerable or not is irrelevant, she could have come to you for the fulfilment she needed. There will always be other people who are interested. Are they predators too if she cheats with them?
Single mom 21, where is the dad? 🚩🚩
Would really like to see a conclusion to this story
not the real conclusion but here is what probabbly most certainly happend
he forgave her, they both "worked it out" he never went back to be himself, she never went to be herself again, eventually she cheated again, or maybe it was him, they both then recognised that they should have gone separated ways long ago, luckly they havent had any other kids, son is now an adult, and he can deal with his parents divorciing better, she goes to be a full on whore, and he never finds love again because you cant just trust anyone at this point
maybe at some points one overdoses and the other game ends themselves
@@rubykila2695 Do you have a link to the rest of the post.
i wouldnt be surprised if she cheated again and we simply never heard about it.
i mean, honestly, how could this guy come back to reddit (or any other social media) and tell people "yeah, i got cheated on again after i took her back for cheating on me before."
he would look like an absolute clown, and i think he knows that. he shouldnt have even made an update post if he wasnt gonna adhere to the advice people were giving him, which was "run fast, not slow."
i hope he learned his lesson, but unfortunately, i know he would have to learn it the hard way.
It's funny how she takes away all responsibility for her actions from herself, makes herself out to be the victim and her husband is just collateral damage. What a cop out. Just accept that your decisions have consequences lol
😅 hahah fucking hell mate, its like you said its a cop out, she's now a victim, and now thos dumbass is going to take her back
Accountability is a Woman Kryptonite - KS
The fact is pretty simple - she's not sorry about any of the ego boosting affairs - she's sorry that she got caught. "Oh no I only wanted these affairs to feel good about myself" - DUH! That's why people have affairs. Hell, you can feel bad about getting extra helpings of ice cream, but at least you're not hurting the other ice cream, and you didn't promise the first ice cream that you'll never have any other, LOL. Again, she's ONLY sorry that she got CAUGHT - all other guilt is just the equivalent of "guilty pleasures" some people get from overeating. The fact that she turned this around to make herself the victim is even more infuriating..... ANYWAY!
... IF this story is true, and she said she'll sign anything - the father should get full custody of the child with only supervised visitations, divorce her on amiable property dividing terms, and tell her "A part of me will always love you and all, but please get someone who's OK with having an open marriage / open relationship / etc. This way your guilty pleasures won't have to betray and hurt other people the way you did to me."
PS: Remember the beginning of this story - when he confronted her without evidence, she didn't show ANY guilt, just indignation about being accused. Again, proof she's not sorry about affairs, she's sorry about being caught.
Most loyal swedish woman
It’s not possible to come back from your wife being raw dogged by another man as sad as this story is. Someone giving your wife attention isn’t an excuse.
Always tell your children about their parent's infidelity. They deserve to know who their parent actually is.
Addiction is a scary thing. You may not realize it, but anything can be an addiction. In this case, the attention she got was what satiated her, and after a few tastes, she could hardly function without it. It's a nasty nasty thing that no one walks away from ok.
Yup, those little kicks are one hell of a drug to the mind deprived of them.
Sounds like she’s making excuses. No an affair can never become so compulsive the person does not have free will. I guarantee you she either thought up what she was going to say to make you pity her or she just wanted to make it sound less like her fault by making it sound like she had no choice but in reality she did. Everytime she met with a new guy or was flirty you crossed through her mind and she decided to do it anyways
Everybody knows she went around spreading her truth as a preventive measure and the "dairy" was cooked probably during the "apathy" week. You could see her true reaction when she was confronted by the husband without any hard proof which was her gaslighting him and going back to the affair like nothing happened. If binging some tv series for a week on a couch and then taking a vacation in a mental health resort is all that it takes to get away when caught in 4k it is no wonder so many people cheat.
Hobby psychologists "guaranteeing" things with no basis whatsoever. Don't talk about things you do not understand.
I doubt she has the brains to plot it this big u know her diary and the video where she didn't enjoy it and some other stuff if she was this smart I believe she would have had better things to do
@@miriamkapeller6754oh, but im guessing you DO understand, since you clearly know enough to know hes wrong, dont you?
otherwise, dont talk about things you dont understand.
@@idkissausername1667 Of course I understand. What he said is completely wrong and naive, how is that even in question.
Jesus fuck. This is probably the worst reaction I've seen of getting caught cheating. I actually feel bad for all sides here
I have a theory that the reaction wasn't just about getting caught. Rather, it was the catalyst that reminded her of all she's done since her aunt died, the way memories of your horrible bender might come flooding back once you wake up sober.
I do agree though, empathy all around.
Her?
Yeah, they both have issues and they both need therapy.
The AP’s wife being so gung-ho to get a revenge lay and then the subsequent description by OP of her was a fun little detail.
I'm sorry. I know this is a serious post but God damn it I lost it at baby rabies.
shits real man, ive seen 30yr olds chasing any man they can in hopes of getting a provider and a kid.
@@dierdred_the_graySo that's what it was! When I was 19, this thirty something YO was chasing me like crazy. She would pay drinks for me, invite me to her hose every other day. The first time I slept with her, I was black out drunk (my first time drinking alcohol) and woke up in her house the next day.
I just don't know about the provider, as I didn't even have a car or a good job till 25 YO
@@MathewCR That was definitely more on the predator side of things rather than baby rabies, you got cougared my dude.
What if the wife was a master manipulator who planned this all out on sum light yamagmi type shit 😂 making a fake diary, usb, everything
I would not be surprised in the slightest
i, too, wouldnt be surprised at all.
hell, atp, id say its MORE likely than her feeling any actual remorse.
on the one hand, giving in to your vanity and escalating things to cheating just to feel "special" is disgusting. just talk to your husband if you're unhappy ffs.
but on the other, if she really does have bpad and major depression, i can realte to the feeling of being a passanger in your own body even in the most fucked up situations. the amounts of bridges i've burtn and people i've slighted before i got help with my bpad makes me drown in shame and guilt even more than a decade later. so i dunno.
these two will need years of therapy, each of them, no matter if they stay together.
I hate it when people that have been cheated on consider reconciliation.
Your partner chose to cheat on you.
They chose to stray from the relationship.
There is no point in staying in a relationship if they chose to move away from it.
So the story is very intense and all that, it sucks it happened, so on and so forth...but the OP's interaction with the AP's wife just got me, LOL. Like, she is _also_ someone who has been cheated on, so you think there would be a mutual understanding between the two of them but instead he's all like, "Damn, woman, you are annoying as hell," 🤣. I don't know why that got me.
"If he had to deal with this all day I can see why he wanted out."
Honestly, a "revenge affair" is so immature and would only makes things worse. I can see why OP would want to stay away from the AP's wife.
I love how broken down people become when they get caught 😂 like naw keep that energy you had when you were cheating.
She only sorry she got caught
The most pure hearted OP ever !
Using depression as an manipulation tool is something I have seen too often. The guy got manipulated soooooo hard it hurts.
I dont think i could ever get back with a woman like this, but this is the first time ive heard of a cheater with receipts 😅, but ill give her props for coming clean without having to fish out half truths....
Fr there is no guarantee that she wouldn't cheat again
Man, this is the one story I want everyone to heal. Not really get back together, but for everyone to heal.
Shits actually sad for everyone involved. More for the father and son, but god damn... That was truly how it looks when someone is wracked with guilt so bad they give up on life, but they dont take the cowards way out. On top of that, she didnt make excuses to anything.
She actually has remorse. Every other AP story I heard hasnt come close to this level of remorse and apology. This the kinda shit that fundamentally changes people
I'll be the first to say "Never go back to someone who cheated on you" but this woman feels different than usual case's.
I genuinely hope (Mostly for her husband and the child) that she redeems herself to the best of her ability and that she doesn't just continue cheating if he ever gives her that second chance.
In this case I think that the best decision is to downgrade her into a gf. Just because you divorced doesn't mean you have to leave each other. She has to understand that her actions have consequences and apparently being a wife is too stable for her mindset.
@@demonvictim Her reaction seems to suggest that she knows quite well though, being downgraded to girlfriend would probably mean little to her compared to the damage she knows she inflicted.
Honestly I wish we just had the answers so that we could fix these kind of situations easier or prevent them all together.
Its so damn disheartening.
@arcadius3257 it's also funny how the affair partner gets the best part in all of this, he got ass but clearly wasn't there when op wife was falling into a deep depression. In these cases, the affair partners are always M.I.A and I've read enough reddit posts to see a common pattern
@@danteerskine7678 Yep, probably off finding a new married target to have an affair with.
Some people have absolutely no shame and actually get off on ruining marriages.
@@arcadius3257 the downgrade is to put her on her best behavior and to make sure she knows he is one foot out. He wants to be there for the son and she is either average or below average in looks considering how he compare to ap wife and knows that op is a catch. So she has to make him want her back in the time period before the kid goes to college and maybe op will cheat on her just to feel better or not but that has no basis anymore since if you've been cheated on there is no longer any striking need to fight off people who want you.
Good lord. His ancestors were all expelled from Valhalla and banished to Helheim. The most simptastic man ever, lol. If Sweden or Norway were pulled into war, the nations would crumble.
What i don't understand is why she didn't rely on someone as kind as op to deal with her depression
Because hurt people hurt people, at least when misguided and making the wrong decisions
Depression can be a feeling of numbness, they don't feel a need for getting better because they don't feel much at all. It's a dark spiral
There’s no value in your simp husband telling you you’re pretty, that’s the whole point he’s too nice. It’s always the nice soft guy 90% of the time
@@YouArentSlick You get it. You definitely get it. If someone makes themselves a doormat don't be surprised you'll get treated like one. She knew him very well better than he knew her. Then he went back and I wouldn't be surprised it happens all over again since the insanity plea worked on him 🙄
@@YouArentSlickWhat’s confusing me though is….. She’s in the hospital, going insane like SHE’S the one who found out he cheated….
You have to respect the fact that she:
1. Was completely transparent by giving him access to her diary and logins.
2. Sincerely apologized without making any excuses.
3. Agreed to sign any legal documents.
It's an act. It's all an act. She's doing this all this for attention. That's why she cheated, that's why she's gone into depression. When it all goes back to normal, she'll cheat again because she didn't get the attention. If he gets back with her, he will regret it for sure.
In a relationship, flirting is the start of cheating, their is no such things as innocent flirting and nobody can change my mind on that
OMg i feel so sorry for you and your son op
28 minutes in
I would bet those 2 weeks she was rotting away in the house was the time she wrote that digital diary.
Bro was smoking some exotic copium at the end. How are you justifying the cheating when your wife isn’t? She didn’t even ask to get back together, she doesn’t even want to talk to you because she pities you and your simp tendencies. “Should I leave her” bruh she left you, have some self worth. If this was about your son you would have simply divorced and gotten full custody due to her neglect, you’re fighting to keep the problem around
He's a doormat
“Good news is you came a long way. Bad news is you went the wrong way”
Shes dramatic af.
Nah, she got some mental problems.
This one is honestly so painful to listen to.
What a doormat
Yeah if you live life as a doormat, don’t be surprised when people walk over you. He loved her son too much and she saw him as a beta cuck. That’s why I would never date a single mother and advise others to do the same. Sadly my lil brother didn’t listen and his wife cheats on him and her son that he took care of since he was 2 years old wanted to fight him over his moms cheating. Go figure right
Thank you
This is one of the extremely rare cases where the cheater is genuinely honest and sorry
Seems like she’s had issues long before but still, not an excuse to cheat. I hope op is okay and the son
AP needs to know that people forgive but can never forget. Unless you will have permanent amnesia. Or else until you die you'll never forget this stain. Ever, but it's his choice.
I find it very strange that she basically wrote an entire book about how sorry she was. Anyone else find that strange but also cute?
I see why some of these guys get cheated on.🙄 Where are their balls? They're too nice showing that they're doormats. They really try to work with the cheater or question themselves for how betrayed they feel like they're the bad guy. Weird asf. No women will respect you if you don't respect yourself.
The diary, the amount of depression the woman falls into, her confession… this reads like a bad story.
your mental health comes first, and honestly it feels like shes still lying and the sex being a chore to her.
Therapy is desperately needed for all concerned, especially the son and OP
This is the first time I feel bad for the cheater... by the sounds of it, her long-term depression had left her so dopamine deprived she sought them out almost on autopilot.... something akin to a split personality that only reunited once she watched the CCTV.
I am not condoning the cheating at all, but it is the first time in while that I cannot comfidently say she knew what she was doing.
True, I felt the same
Nah, this affair took time, there's no way she didn't know what she was doing. I'd understand this reasoning if it was actually just a one night stand.
@@brightiris it honestly sounds like her higher brain function hasn't been there since her aunt died, as if she's lost in a dream or living in an out of body experience. So while she might be aware of what she was doing, that higher function of morality and accountability in her mind would have been shut down.
In that case, she would have a quiet version of temporary insanity.
@@Maninawig So now that she got caught, only then her "higher brain function" suddenly worked? That's utter bs. She literally said she herself CHASED that man after the AP turned cold.
@@700nurawhy
Your giving in bro, take your son and never look back. She can worry about her own mental health and well being like everyone else in the world.
I like that the cage fighters where just like “yeah this guy needs to hit something/someone”
ua-cam.com/video/NTOVKcX9PCY/v-deo.htmlsi=INFEPDFTaH9uixwZ
Everyone TRUST YOUR GUT FEELING!!! Never ever ignore it.
Her condition is called WH0r3
She is extremely faking it because she was caught and is only sorry because she was caught.
My xhusband pulled emo bs like this until one day he said if you leave me I'll unalive myself so I said here are our divorce documents sign and finish ur $h!t show for someone else.
Get full custody or parental rights of the child somehow and divorce that 304. Cheaters gonna cheat no matter how "remorseful" they seem to look like.
Not all cheaters are so evil they're unforgivable. However, just don't take them back...
I really don’t think OP should reconcile with his wife. The comment about salvation from the letter setting off red flags.
If only she had thought about the consequences before she had her fun.
“I’ve always loved you”. The biggest lie. She’s for the streets
His final rant about thinking his current wife wouldn't cheat again felt like desperation.
I fully believe she thinks her depression caused this and she thinks she will never cheat again,
but if it caused it once, the same situation could repeat. I do not believe for a second she is incapable of cheating on him again.
Imagine, cheating on the man you supposedly love, then when he leaves you like he should..... you literally go insane
Either that's the definition of a guilty conscience or I don't know what it is.🤨
If she was truly guilty she would've went insane before he left. So she wasn't sorry, only sorry he left and she got caught.
You know it's a bad one when you just start getting angry at every single thing the OP says in the last five minutes.
Felt bad for the guy until he choose to be a doormat to the very end.