Love this! 15yrs Royal Marine, Worked 14hrs daily, on my own business, Military Contracting too, lost my wife, my kids, my marriage of 17yrs, diagnosed with TBI, severe clinical depression, Complex PTSD and 2 attempts at suicide, all before lockdown. I needed to hear this. Thank you for being transparent and having the balls to be vulnerable, that takes real strength, sir.
Phenomenal!!! You guys learned something in 6 months that many of us never learn until it's far too late. Keep communicating like that with each other no matter what. You never get a do-over.
Communication! The most important thing between a husband and wife. The lack of this ruined my first marriage...and I wanted it more than anything. When it was over, it was over.
@Mr Popeye hey Mr know it all maybe you should listen instead of having a poor out look. It's bad etiquette to judge another person let alone relationship, especially when you have big holes in your own. Please take care of that drinking problem if not for you, for your kids.
3 C’s of healthy relationships 1- Communication 2- Compromise 3- Commitment You guys look to have something really special, keep doing what you’re doing!
Lack of communication is a symptom, it’s not enough to say ‘we don’t communicate,’ there’s generally a reason or a challenge that needs to be dealt with. I ask myself, “what’s my role in this?”
I love the "keeping it real" vibe. Our problems are miniscule compared to other people and places. For me it's like watching my wife and I talk. I'm to phlegmatic and she's quite open. It's a great mix and you guys are showing it live and proud ❤❤
It’s great to see you putting up examples for those who are in a relationship to know. That it takes work to keep a relationship strong and it’s ok to accept/ask for help. If not you end up with resentment towards one another. Well done Katie & Shawn
You absolutely nailed it my friend!!!! I realized this fact about 6 years ago and said “efff it” changed my ways and it’s only been awesome ever since. Stay positive and remember 3 minds are better than 1.
Shawn, your podcasts are absolutely amazing. I watch a lot of podcasts and you and Mike Ritland are both at the top. Thank you for all your effort. I worked for a company that was started by a WW II glider pilot. He became an excellent mentor for me for 25 years. A couple things he taught me was “ hire good people around you, then let them do their job”. “ If someone does something different than you do it, it’s not wrong, it’s just different”
Can’t help but smile watching this. Especially going through these lessons myself. We have a 20 month old and man does it get tough. Thanks Shawn for the support knowing we all go through this.
Seeing a problem, fixing it and discussing it like adults is something we all need more of. It’s easy to sweep things under the rug, but eventually that starts eating away at the rest of your relationship if left unaddressed. As a team it’s not always 50/50, sometimes it will need to be 60/40 when your partner needs help but being open and communicating will always keep you in sync. Y’all are awesome and a huge inspiration. Keep being you 👍🏻
When I got married we said we were going to wait a year to think about kids, but my wife was pregnant after 6 weeks. After 3 years we had three kids. She had postpartum depression after every birth. The amount of noise and chaos in our house is intense. Sometimes you're so overwhelmed that the thought of asking for help doesn't even enter your mind. I appreciate you guys keeping it real.
Bubble bath, party time, control freak. Thank you both for opening up about addiction and needing help! You guy's are so beautiful together, I'm glad you found each other 💯 now that you did the treatment I can see that you are more happier , I have so many questions for you now 😊 Cheer's beautiful family 🙏❤️
I’m sharing these with my sons mother/ex wife. It’s helping us be better co parents and understand our past relationship. Thank you and keep them coming.
I am a 100% disabled vet. I had 9 operations between 2017 and 2019, I am a single father, so if I wasn't in the hospital, I was mostly alone. I was hooked up to IV's and immobile during that time. The older boys helped me and kept things going. They were my rock, but it messed me up mentally. I met a woman from school that I had liked since junior high, but I was in so much pain I wanted to die. I was all messed up mentally, but I knew she made me happy, and she and my boys gave me a reason to fight for me to get well. It took from 2019 to the end of 2021 to get my mental meds right, hardcore counseling, letting her walk away for 5 months, and now we are back together, now that I am mentally doing really much better. My pain is much better, and now I am living the best life that I have ever had. I am physically at my worst, but I have the best woman in the world for me, we have great kids that all get along, great grand-kids, and we like the same things. We both support each other. She likes me for who I am.
The one thing I learned in almost 60 years on this earth is "Be enough of a man to know you don't need to be that much of a man". It's ok to ask for help to be the best you. I have a very strong alpha personality and have made my share of mistakes because of that. I'm in the second phase of life and want to think I have learned from all my mistakes. I probably haven't but it's still a work in progress. I'm so glad you two are sitting down and working out the things that need to be worked out. Great video. I wish nothing but the best for you two.
Kudos youse two...what a liberating topic and understanding first of all the need you recognize the need to say help. At 65 years of age myself...I have no choice but to ask for help. Never had the need cause that old stubborn SOB refused to ask no matter how much it pained me to go solo. All these years my lovely wife of 34 years was right all along...now I get it! Thanks you two, you're certainly a fun couple to watch!
GREAT JOB guys!!!! I was a single dad for over 16 years and I never asked for help or released control. Lord knows I did need the help and should have asked. Fast forward 20 years.... my health isn't great because I didn't put myself first. It's not selfish to do so because if you don't, you may not be around to take care of those that depend on you. Secondly, it will destroy any relationship you have or try to develope. You two keep working at it, you are headed down the right path CONGRATS!!
I won’t go into some grand stand comment. But I can’t describe how grateful I am for you, and your wife’s transparency. It’s a massive help and a great venue to reorient and understand that I’m on the right path to find a good companion. Thanks, Shawn.
Once you can recognize that control is an illusion you can begin to trust others & finally get to a point of trusting yourself. Through constantly focusing on staying true to your inner soul, you can become able to quiet down the underlying need to control situations, people, & things by loosening your grip & breathing. Within the Teams, it feels like there are 2 different opposing realities. One reality is knowing how challenging the circumstances & dynamics can be on it's families. The second reality is what society views the job to be of a Navy SEAL. Choosing to make a change requires self-reflection, courage, sacrifice, hardwork, perserverence, & gratitude that leads to resiliency. I wish you well on this lifelong journey!
Welcome to parenthood. You are both great, incredible people, which makes outstanding parents. Remember there is no "normal" life, there's just life. Respect and honor each others thoughts, ideas, and always be honest and support each other. I have made it 34 years with my better half, using these goals. GOD, family, country! You guys make a great team!🙏💕
you may see it in comments a thousand times, but I'm not sure you will actually realise how much these candid talks do, it clicks so many switches in my head and makes me think i need to work harder, Thank You both.
There is a book called “healthy sleep healthy child”. It’ll save you tons of sleep and your child will almost never have a tantrum. One of the best child books ever written. I recommend it.
I'm an prior PJ. Back then 38th ARRS. You have been a breath of fresh air. I left my team in 84. Old school air Force was hard stupid. We were transitioning to josoc. Constant negativity. Bringing all these type A's together. Just broke up with my fiance. But it helps to know I wasn't alone. God bless you and your wife. Love your show.
Slogans on coffee mugs: Great 💡 idea I loved the show. I’m kinda a bit of a Control freak. Not even once in a While. Your right… that would cause resentment. Teach us, we like 👍 it. Luv you both, Sandy
I hope 🤞 you have a summer TEE SHIR This Spring. I’d like to order some of your Things. I’ve been spending $ 100.0O or so on some of my subscribers. I’d really like a baseball type tee, cap, and slogan coffee mug. Lastly…not least 🐻your gummy bears 🙌👌🏼😎
Thank you very much, My wife (now ex-wife) of 21 years engaged in multiple affairs with convicted felons. Additionally, she has an enormous gambling addiction with her net losses of over three million dollars. She and others engaged in a number of criminal activities (most notably embezzlement of myself to over a million dollars) to fund her losses. My life has been almost completely destroyed, however I am trying to be positive moving forward every day. I appreciate you, and your, wife’s efforts.
I love the maturity you two bring to the table. So raw and real. Please keep these kinds of convos going! PS. you two should end each video with a hug. Lol
I really appreciate these couples videos. When I watch your routine videos. I understand what your family is doing when your doing hard hitting videos. It’s got to be stressful for you a couple . You are stressing about producing the successful shows you do. It takes a small tribe to run a business. A small circle of artistic, bright, intelligent, well spoken, critical thinking, common sense folks. There’s travel, being apart as a family. Meetings, and running a home , grocery shopping, paying bills and trying to keep a social lif also. I get the babysitter debacle. I’m thankful my mom and other family helped out with the babysitting when my career got hectic, long hours ect.
"First step at solving a problem is recognizing that there is one." I love these videos. Not a lot of people out there are willing to discuss at length about their own shortcomings or experiences in learning... especially something brand new like being a parent. You both are willing to take a breath, recognize that help is needed and are willing to seek out whatever is necessary to get you back to neutral. Whether it be for your business, or Sonny, or more importantly, your relationship with each other .... you're finding ways to grow, get stronger, and make sure your home remains intact. I have three kids and let me assure you, it only gets better. It's all peaks and valleys ... Sonny will only make you two better. You guys are doing a great job, I have related to every story you have posted so far and I laugh out loud every. damn. time. Anyone who's a parent with 1, 3, or 5 have ALL been there. Trust it. It's not just you. God Bless you all.
You guys are awesome! As much as we enjoy watching, you guys need to do this every Sunday for yourselves and if we get to watch great, if not oh well. Good luck!
As if your experiences in the martial world weren’t enough, now you present an entirely different side of a person(s) who won’t accept mediocrity let alone failure in their lives! I’m more impressed than ever. I only learned these things in the last 5 or so years, and it took decades of heart break and disappointment to makes myself ready to get those lessons. Keep up the great work and sharing with us so solidly.
You both are charismatic soulful people and an evolving couple who are authentically appealing. Thank you for creating enjoyable content to watch just being yourselves. May God give you the knowledge to forever grow your passions for life! Best of luck with raising your child/family!
Reminds me of how my wife always feels guilty going to get her hair or nails done. It doesn’t bother me in the slightest. It’s a very cathartic release for women to be able to have their peace and quiet and do these things. Just like it’s a man’s outlet to go work on my car for a while, or do some woodworking or whatever your hobby is. But man, business and a wife all in one I can see it being rough not being able to mentally out work aside for a while. 💯 keep doing what you’re doing both of you. People are cool shit. ✌🏼
My wife and I had these conversations for the last 15 years just like you guys. A open and brutally honest relationship will stand the test of time , but when you find your soul purpose at this time of your life , husband , father , provider you are good , and If all else fails wife the wifey don’t sweet the petty stuff pet the sweaty stuff
You are both very smart.. I've seen and been part of so many relationships that suffocate due to getting too busy being busy.. There is nothing wrong with being a "Go Getter". At the same time, you have to have balance. Truly, that is one of the hardest decisions in life. Money, work, Wife, Kido's, you name it... Just remember, you can never get time back once it's gone.. Spend time with your Family. In my opinion, that is the most important part of life.. Also, communication is key, honest communication.. You two are a real treat to watch.. Thank you..
Love you guys. Your honesty is very real. It is the hardest thing to give a little control over the kids when they're so small and helpless in this world. Me and my wife never would allow anyone to watch our kids. Very protective of ours. I worked nights she worked days and passed in the wind. Weekends where ours. So business I felt like I had to do everything for it to turn out the way it should. After losing my mother a year ago and dad into Altzheimers I'm learning I have help. So good to see you guys are getting this done early. Sometimes the struggles are where we find the answers and they were always there. Live the great life. Enjoy. And thanks for what you guys are doing. It does make the difference
Indeed, the struggles are out there. It's great to hear about others who have these moments, what people have been through, and the faith it takes to find the other end.
Susan & Tony here, We are 37 yrs into it and really every day we need to talk it out. But its been that way since day one. Don't expect anything from your spouse and they win never disappoint. Do more for others. God Bless
HolyCow man!! Dude I drank so much when I got back from Iraq for far to long and didn’t realize what my wonderful amazing wife/best friend was going through along with me! We had so many struggles but we worked through them and I’ve been sober since 28June2019!!! Love you guys and all your shows!!!
I don’t think I’ve ever commented on a UA-cam video before but this one hit home. I love the Shawn Ryan Show and these more candid videos that you two put out. I myself am a control freak, it’s a miracle from God that my wife and I have lasted for 22 years because she’s had to put up with all of my narcissism and OCD. It didn’t help being a career Marine. Being a control freak made me good at my job but then it always came home with me. Luckily we made it to retirement. Thank you both and I love the mug idea.
@@ShawnRyanShow I feel like I’m still transitioning, it’s been one year this month. After over 24 years it’s a big adjustment. Fortunately do to COVID my wife and I both telework which has aloud us a lot of quality time to get reacquainted. I spent my last 7 years on AD as a geo-bachelor. It wasn’t as bad as it sounds, I was close enough to come home every couple of weekends as long as I wasn’t TAD or deployed. Thanks for the response, you guys are the best.
Hey, guys, great conversation, polite and calm. I'm married for almost 19 yrs, three kids, youngest 10 So once i heard someone saying Kids used to grow up in the world of adults. I mean look at Jewish kids. They are taken by their fathers to the wall for a prayer. Kids must incorporate themselves into the wolrs of adults. Contemporary culture, unfortunately, caters to kids. As u mentioned in another video, you prepared a nice nursery for your son, and ended up not needed half of those things. There is a proverb in Russian that I attempted to translate: With the firstborn, things are sterilized, boiled, washed, dried, ironed. With the second child, the things are washed. With the third, when the child tried dog food, well, looks like the dog got some problems. So I would repeat after some othet blogger, do what u can do best, and delegate the rest. Mom is the queen of the house. You need to have a few full days with the baby, and then some half days, and sometimes a full weekend off. You can be at the house doimg chores, while the nanny walks in the park with the baby. Or whatever. Set up datenight every three weeks on a Friday night, or whatever weekday works best. It's ao excited to look forward for that specific day. Kids are given to us for a short time. Give them life, food, shelter, educate them, teach them, and then let them fly. They will go away some day and you will stay home with your spouse. Your spouse is #1, not the child. And never do for the kid what he or she can do himself/herself. Blessings!
I started a Family Contracting Company 25 years ago, Between the Fire Department Job and this Family Job I beat myself to damn near death. What I am saying is Delegate but never ever take your hands completely off the Wheel so to speak.
I love you guys, thank you for sharing with us and giving some positivity and good direction in reality. One of the only UA-cam channels I feel a "family" aspect to. Hopefully we're all on the same train trying to do well and be strong simultaneously. The openness and vulnerable talks only accent the Alpha in you both
Those types of conversations are highly important to keep the pillars of your relationship strong. And I'm glad that you two are sharing those realities with your followers/Patreons/Communities. It surely can assist others who are looking for answers. Bravo Zulu two both of you!
God Bless the both of you !!! You both sacrificed so much in life, you both need a breath of fresh air from time to time.... hang in there your both deserve the best out of life !!!!
I've been watching all these videos and am enjoying them . Sometimes it's good to be reminded that your not the only one in a relationship that's not perfect but as long as you're both trying it can be great.
Life is a constant struggle. Finding that person to fight along side you is the best part about a relationship. You can just tell by the way you guys look at each other that you have that. If you place family, love, compassion and communication as your top priorities then you can navigate through any obstacles life throws at you.
It's the real world man..........I applaud both of you for seeing it for what it is. You gotta lighten up and enjoy all of it.........the work and your relationship! Parenthood is an awesome responsibility..... and a full time job if the responsibility is assumed! Work will always be there and there will always be more money to be made but you should spoil your wife and child with quality time and love. You will never regret the time spent. Great video!
Great work! What stands out to me is you 2 seem to have a healthy respect for each other, to allow vulnerability to rise up within your relationship. Filming it shows your commitment and accountability for your marriage. You 2 are very mature, keep going. By the way I have enjoyed your past shows due to the military "slant" , this " slant" is so Cool 😎. Keep mixing it up. By the way Candy, my wife, and I live in Chattanooga and come up to y'all's area to a BNB in Liepers Fork. God Speed!
You two are blessed to have figured this out this early in your relationship. God bless ya’s. And remember, parents don’t make children, children make parents.
It's not just communication. It's the understanding in the communication. It's what's being compromised, and forgiveness is tantamount. Anger is controllable for the day. That's why forgiveness is so important, on the daily. As time goes by, anger and unforgiveness start to fester and become unmanageable. That's why people want to give up on each other. They don't manage the aspects of communication, anger, and forgiveness. It's not the quaint saying of "I can't live without you!" It's the, " I have to live WITH you?!" Anyone can get along together when the 'gettings' good. That's easy. But before you get into a long-term relationship, find out what's the fighting style.... yell, scream, physical, avoidance, silent treatment? Like mindedness is very important. It's best to be similar, but not exactly the same.
Love it I also love the view of the creek I live in Miramar Florida and I built a waterfall and koi pond just for that escape factor in the day keep up the amazing work
You Built Your House Together....Relationship Bond is the Glue. Don't Ever Give up on eachother. Now more thanever We Need Eachother. Love Your Content. GBLSS
I’ve been married to my wife 25 years this year. We got married when I was in Texas at USAF tech school, Shepard AFB. We have had highs and lows! My wife has been an amazing. I got hurt removed medically, faced the bs with the VA, depression, anger, rehabilitation from my injury. Then kids, debt, just a lot of things that come with all the struggles of being a disabled vet. Communication is key! You have to know your partner is 💯 committed to you. My family sucks, her family is not much better, but together if you communicate nothing is an issue that can’t be resolved. Love your channel, keep working because marriage is work. I will say if you read this, you have to learn to separate work from home, work has hours of operation, home is just that is not about work, it’s about family and yourself. My wife has an office, she works from home, that’s exactly what that space is, work, so make sure you separate that! You can’t bring work home, or can she it’s just not healthy. God bless
Lots of wisdom spoken in this piece, as an old veteran, I will just say that control is a symptom of experiences we as vets had, control it takes its toll on those who care for you, it took 40 years for me to look for help, glad you found it quicker. As an older wiser buddy at the VA told me, the Goal is to put it in a box, and just peak inside and make sure it's still in there! great content, look forward to your work.
I ❤ these personal moments! We can all relate. Thank you! I was feeling like Id be single forever...till i heard your story! Now i realize that the best times of my life havent even happened yet!
Last weeks mug “ Time to Party!”. & Glad to hear the treatment went well. Ever since since your Capone show, I’ve been really interested in it & wish I could get someone close to me in.
My husband and I watch your show together and we love it !!! It always open up more dialogue for us on your topics. Lol I love the setting too. Can't wait to see more.
Where were you two in 1992 when my x and I needed you the most lol I wish I had learned all the things you are bringing into the forefront. Glad to see you are putting your relationship first and willing to share with everyone. 🥰 Please keep sharing, love it.
God bless always shawn to your family ' you know your WAIRUA is overwhelming from where I'm from in the world your a man of MANA 'your humility in every interview always shines through. I'm from NZ the words in capitals Is from the maori language who are the n ative the people of new Zealand . I'm from where Willie apiatas is from . God bless
Getting REAL.... No couple is perfect, everyone has issues, but you both really love each other...and being open and transparent is amazing to see. Keep it up!
having a little one always makes ya feel guilty about doing Anything for yourselves, but you gotta make time for each other to have a healthy relationship. You guys make a great team 💪
Y’all are always honest and open, which is the opposite of most Instagram/UA-cam channels which constantly show only the perception of positive. Thank you for that. Keep up the great work.
This is great I mean you usually only see the business side of these podcasts but you have let us in to your private life it truly feels like your family are close family friends thank you for this
My grandfather told me , men make mistakes , admitting to those mistakes makes stronger. There is no I in team , we are only as strong as the people we surround our selves with. You're on the right track.
I don’t know either of you personally, but you both seem to have a firm grasp on what’s the best for your family. You seem perfect for each other and I wish you both the best.
Dude please keep pushing these out. In a culture of divorce and shallow relationships, this is so refreshing!!
Love this!
15yrs Royal Marine, Worked 14hrs daily, on my own business, Military Contracting too, lost my wife, my kids, my marriage of 17yrs, diagnosed with TBI, severe clinical depression, Complex PTSD and 2 attempts at suicide, all before lockdown. I needed to hear this. Thank you for being transparent and having the balls to be vulnerable, that takes real strength, sir.
You’ve got this.
God bless you.
how you doing man, saying a prayer for ya
God bless you, I pray for your healing and your life made whole
Sending hope & love ❤ your way 😊
The enemy wants to destroy marriage and family. Don’t let him. Keep God at the center. I’m praying for you guys.
Phenomenal!!! You guys learned something in 6 months that many of us never learn until it's far too late. Keep communicating like that with each other no matter what. You never get a do-over.
Thank you, and we will.
This comment right here is IT . Super important and necessary to a healthy relationship. No room for ego’s in a relationship
Communication! The most important thing between a husband and wife. The lack of this ruined my first marriage...and I wanted it more than anything. When it was over, it was over.
@Mr Popeye hey Mr know it all maybe you should listen instead of having a poor out look. It's bad etiquette to judge another person let alone relationship, especially when you have big holes in your own. Please take care of that drinking problem if not for you, for your kids.
It’s an awesome thing to set down and go HMm!
3 C’s of healthy relationships
1- Communication
2- Compromise
3- Commitment
You guys look to have something really special, keep doing what you’re doing!
Thank you Mark.
@@ShawnRyanShow you’re welcome, I think you two showing what a healthy relationship looks like is something this world needs to see more of
And the most important three words of them all: "You're right, babe"
@@bubbaballer88 😂
Lack of communication is a symptom, it’s not enough to say ‘we don’t communicate,’ there’s generally a reason or a challenge that needs to be dealt with. I ask myself, “what’s my role in this?”
Everything gets matured. You entering new phases, sorting all out, being a family, and You know what? You are healthy, and Blessed.........💯
I love the "keeping it real" vibe. Our problems are miniscule compared to other people and places. For me it's like watching my wife and I talk. I'm to phlegmatic and she's quite open. It's a great mix and you guys are showing it live and proud ❤❤
It’s great to see you putting up examples for those who are in a relationship to know. That it takes work to keep a relationship strong and it’s ok to accept/ask for help. If not you end up with resentment towards one another.
Well done Katie & Shawn
Thank you. I really appreciate that.
Agreed, and excellent user name
Got married June 24, 1978. Met in high school 1975. I don't know how she put up with me. Love is powerful. Enjoy your family brother. Danny Hayes LEO
Vulnerability and Honesty. Powerhouse couple. I very much enjoy these two's content. Wholesome stuff.
Thank you
You absolutely nailed it my friend!!!! I realized this fact about 6 years ago and said “efff it” changed my ways and it’s only been awesome ever since. Stay positive and remember 3 minds are better than 1.
Shawn, your podcasts are absolutely amazing. I watch a lot of podcasts and you and Mike Ritland are both at the top. Thank you for all your effort. I worked for a company that was started by a WW II glider pilot. He became an excellent mentor for me for 25 years. A couple things he taught me was “ hire good people around you, then let them do their job”. “ If someone does something different than you do it, it’s not wrong, it’s just different”
Can’t help but smile watching this. Especially going through these lessons myself. We have a 20 month old and man does it get tough. Thanks Shawn for the support knowing we all go through this.
Seeing a problem, fixing it and discussing it like adults is something we all need more of. It’s easy to sweep things under the rug, but eventually that starts eating away at the rest of your relationship if left unaddressed. As a team it’s not always 50/50, sometimes it will need to be 60/40 when your partner needs help but being open and communicating will always keep you in sync. Y’all are awesome and a huge inspiration. Keep being you 👍🏻
I used to think asking for help was weak. But, what your wife said about holding oneself accountable is spot on. Thanks guys, you rock 😊
Awesome! Thank you Justin! Cheers my friend!
When I got married we said we were going to wait a year to think about kids, but my wife was pregnant after 6 weeks. After 3 years we had three kids. She had postpartum depression after every birth. The amount of noise and chaos in our house is intense. Sometimes you're so overwhelmed that the thought of asking for help doesn't even enter your mind. I appreciate you guys keeping it real.
Right on man showing the more human side of thing is always a fresh breath of air! Keep it up!
I appreciate that!
Bubble bath, party time, control freak. Thank you both for opening up about addiction and needing help! You guy's are so beautiful together, I'm glad you found each other 💯 now that you did the treatment I can see that you are more happier , I have so many questions for you now 😊 Cheer's beautiful family 🙏❤️
Nice to see you speaking openly. Reflecting. The commitment is clear -- you both wear that well. #team
I’m sharing these with my sons mother/ex wife. It’s helping us be better co parents and understand our past relationship. Thank you and keep them coming.
I am a 100% disabled vet. I had 9 operations between 2017 and 2019, I am a single father, so if I wasn't in the hospital, I was mostly alone. I was hooked up to IV's and immobile during that time. The older boys helped me and kept things going. They were my rock, but it messed me up mentally. I met a woman from school that I had liked since junior high, but I was in so much pain I wanted to die. I was all messed up mentally, but I knew she made me happy, and she and my boys gave me a reason to fight for me to get well. It took from 2019 to the end of 2021 to get my mental meds right, hardcore counseling, letting her walk away for 5 months, and now we are back together, now that I am mentally doing really much better. My pain is much better, and now I am living the best life that I have ever had. I am physically at my worst, but I have the best woman in the world for me, we have great kids that all get along, great grand-kids, and we like the same things. We both support each other. She likes me for who I am.
The one thing I learned in almost 60 years on this earth is "Be enough of a man to know you don't need to be that much of a man". It's ok to ask for help to be the best you. I have a very strong alpha personality and have made my share of mistakes because of that. I'm in the second phase of life and want to think I have learned from all my mistakes. I probably haven't but it's still a work in progress. I'm so glad you two are sitting down and working out the things that need to be worked out. Great video. I wish nothing but the best for you two.
Kudos youse two...what a liberating topic and understanding first of all the need you recognize the need to say help. At 65 years of age myself...I have no choice but to ask for help. Never had the need cause that old stubborn SOB refused to ask no matter how much it pained me to go solo. All these years my lovely wife of 34 years was right all along...now I get it! Thanks you two, you're certainly a fun couple to watch!
Congratulations on 34 years to you and your special lady.
GREAT JOB guys!!!! I was a single dad for over 16 years and I never asked for help or released control. Lord knows I did need the help and should have asked. Fast forward 20 years.... my health isn't great because I didn't put myself first. It's not selfish to do so because if you don't, you may not be around to take care of those that depend on you. Secondly, it will destroy any relationship you have or try to develope. You two keep working at it, you are headed down the right path CONGRATS!!
I won’t go into some grand stand comment. But I can’t describe how grateful I am for you, and your wife’s transparency. It’s a massive help and a great venue to reorient and understand that I’m on the right path to find a good companion. Thanks, Shawn.
You are so welcome
Once you can recognize that control is an illusion you can begin to trust others & finally get to a point of trusting yourself. Through constantly focusing on staying true to your inner soul, you can become able to quiet down the underlying need to control situations, people, & things by loosening your grip & breathing.
Within the Teams, it feels like there are 2 different opposing realities. One reality is knowing how challenging the circumstances & dynamics can be on it's families. The second reality is what society views the job to be of a Navy SEAL.
Choosing to make a change requires self-reflection, courage, sacrifice, hardwork, perserverence, & gratitude that leads to resiliency. I wish you well on this lifelong journey!
Welcome to parenthood. You are both great, incredible people, which makes outstanding parents. Remember there is no "normal" life, there's just life. Respect and honor each others thoughts, ideas, and always be honest and support each other. I have made it 34 years with my better half, using these goals. GOD, family, country! You guys make a great team!🙏💕
you may see it in comments a thousand times, but I'm not sure you will actually realise how much these candid talks do, it clicks so many switches in my head and makes me think i need to work harder, Thank You both.
There is a book called “healthy sleep healthy child”. It’ll save you tons of sleep and your child will almost never have a tantrum. One of the best child books ever written. I recommend it.
I'm an prior PJ. Back then 38th ARRS. You have been a breath of fresh air. I left my team in 84. Old school air Force was hard stupid. We were transitioning to josoc. Constant negativity. Bringing all these type A's together. Just broke up with my fiance. But it helps to know I wasn't alone. God bless you and your wife. Love your show.
Slogans on coffee mugs: Great 💡 idea
I loved the show. I’m kinda a bit of a
Control freak. Not even once in a
While. Your right… that would cause
resentment. Teach us, we like 👍 it.
Luv you both,
Sandy
Love that!
I hope 🤞 you have a summer TEE SHIR This Spring. I’d like to order some of your
Things. I’ve been spending $ 100.0O or so on some of my subscribers. I’d really like a baseball type tee, cap, and slogan coffee mug. Lastly…not least 🐻your gummy bears 🙌👌🏼😎
Thank you very much,
My wife (now ex-wife) of 21 years engaged in multiple affairs with convicted felons.
Additionally, she has an enormous gambling addiction with her net losses of over three million dollars.
She and others engaged in a number of criminal activities (most notably embezzlement of myself to over a million dollars) to fund her losses.
My life has been almost completely destroyed, however I am trying to be positive moving forward every day.
I appreciate you, and your, wife’s efforts.
I love the maturity you two bring to the table. So raw and real. Please keep these kinds of convos going!
PS. you two should end each video with a hug. Lol
I really appreciate these couples videos. When I watch your routine videos. I understand what your family is doing when your doing hard hitting videos. It’s got to be stressful for you a couple . You are stressing about producing the successful shows you do. It takes a small tribe to run a business. A small circle of artistic, bright, intelligent, well spoken, critical thinking, common sense folks. There’s travel, being apart as a family. Meetings, and running a home , grocery shopping, paying bills and trying to keep a social lif also. I get the babysitter debacle. I’m thankful my mom and other family helped out with the babysitting when my career got hectic, long hours ect.
"First step at solving a problem is recognizing that there is one." I love these videos. Not a lot of people out there are willing to discuss at length about their own shortcomings or experiences in learning... especially something brand new like being a parent. You both are willing to take a breath, recognize that help is needed and are willing to seek out whatever is necessary to get you back to neutral. Whether it be for your business, or Sonny, or more importantly, your relationship with each other .... you're finding ways to grow, get stronger, and make sure your home remains intact. I have three kids and let me assure you, it only gets better. It's all peaks and valleys ... Sonny will only make you two better. You guys are doing a great job, I have related to every story you have posted so far and I laugh out loud every. damn. time. Anyone who's a parent with 1, 3, or 5 have ALL been there. Trust it. It's not just you. God Bless you all.
You guys are awesome! As much as we enjoy watching, you guys need to do this every Sunday for yourselves and if we get to watch great, if not oh well. Good luck!
I seriously love you two and your son is freakin adorable. Seriously, bucket list and you are on it!
As if your experiences in the martial world weren’t enough, now you present an entirely different side of a person(s) who won’t accept mediocrity let alone failure in their lives! I’m more impressed than ever. I only learned these things in the last 5 or so years, and it took decades of heart break and disappointment to makes myself ready to get those lessons. Keep up the great work and sharing with us so solidly.
You both are charismatic soulful people and an evolving couple who are authentically appealing. Thank you for creating enjoyable content to watch just being yourselves. May God give you the knowledge to forever grow your passions for life! Best of luck with raising your child/family!
Reminds me of how my wife always feels guilty going to get her hair or nails done. It doesn’t bother me in the slightest. It’s a very cathartic release for women to be able to have their peace and quiet and do these things. Just like it’s a man’s outlet to go work on my car for a while, or do some woodworking or whatever your hobby is. But man, business and a wife all in one I can see it being rough not being able to mentally out work aside for a while. 💯 keep doing what you’re doing both of you. People are cool shit. ✌🏼
lol I love how he says “mine and yours relationship” instead of “our relationship”. Love the videos guys!!!! Keep ‘em coming!
My wife and I had these conversations for the last 15 years just like you guys. A open and brutally honest relationship will stand the test of time , but when you find your soul purpose at this time of your life , husband , father , provider you are good , and If all else fails wife the wifey don’t sweet the petty stuff pet the sweaty stuff
You are both very smart.. I've seen and been part of so many relationships that suffocate due to getting too busy being busy.. There is nothing wrong with being a "Go Getter". At the same time, you have to have balance. Truly, that is one of the hardest decisions in life. Money, work, Wife, Kido's, you name it... Just remember, you can never get time back once it's gone.. Spend time with your Family. In my opinion, that is the most important part of life.. Also, communication is key, honest communication.. You two are a real treat to watch.. Thank you..
Love you guys. Your honesty is very real. It is the hardest thing to give a little control over the kids when they're so small and helpless in this world. Me and my wife never would allow anyone to watch our kids. Very protective of ours. I worked nights she worked days and passed in the wind. Weekends where ours. So business I felt like I had to do everything for it to turn out the way it should. After losing my mother a year ago and dad into Altzheimers I'm learning I have help. So good to see you guys are getting this done early. Sometimes the struggles are where we find the answers and they were always there. Live the great life. Enjoy. And thanks for what you guys are doing. It does make the difference
Thank you. You two are doing this beautifully. I’ve been married for 16 yrs. this is what it takes! Solid work!
Indeed, the struggles are out there. It's great to hear about others who have these moments, what people have been through, and the faith it takes to find the other end.
Susan & Tony here, We are 37 yrs into it and really every day we need to talk it out. But its been that way since day one. Don't expect anything from your spouse and they win never disappoint. Do more for others. God Bless
HolyCow man!! Dude I drank so much when I got back from Iraq for far to long and didn’t realize what my wonderful amazing wife/best friend was going through along with me! We had so many struggles but we worked through them and I’ve been sober since 28June2019!!! Love you guys and all your shows!!!
I don’t think I’ve ever commented on a UA-cam video before but this one hit home. I love the Shawn Ryan Show and these more candid videos that you two put out. I myself am a control freak, it’s a miracle from God that my wife and I have lasted for 22 years because she’s had to put up with all of my narcissism and OCD. It didn’t help being a career Marine. Being a control freak made me good at my job but then it always came home with me. Luckily we made it to retirement. Thank you both and I love the mug idea.
Congratulations on retirement. That must’ve been a tough transition. Cheers 🇺🇸
@@ShawnRyanShow I feel like I’m still transitioning, it’s been one year this month. After over 24 years it’s a big adjustment. Fortunately do to COVID my wife and I both telework which has aloud us a lot of quality time to get reacquainted. I spent my last 7 years on AD as a geo-bachelor. It wasn’t as bad as it sounds, I was close enough to come home every couple of weekends as long as I wasn’t TAD or deployed. Thanks for the response, you guys are the best.
My husband and I adore you two and just started watching. Love to see your growth.
Hey, guys, great conversation, polite and calm.
I'm married for almost 19 yrs, three kids, youngest 10
So once i heard someone saying
Kids used to grow up in the world of adults. I mean look at Jewish kids. They are taken by their fathers to the wall for a prayer. Kids must incorporate themselves into the wolrs of adults.
Contemporary culture, unfortunately, caters to kids. As u mentioned in another video, you prepared a nice nursery for your son, and ended up not needed half of those things.
There is a proverb in Russian that I attempted to translate:
With the firstborn, things are sterilized, boiled, washed, dried, ironed.
With the second child, the things are washed.
With the third, when the child tried dog food, well, looks like the dog got some problems.
So I would repeat after some othet blogger, do what u can do best, and delegate the rest.
Mom is the queen of the house. You need to have a few full days with the baby, and then some half days, and sometimes a full weekend off.
You can be at the house doimg chores, while the nanny walks in the park with the baby.
Or whatever.
Set up datenight every three weeks on a Friday night, or whatever weekday works best.
It's ao excited to look forward for that specific day.
Kids are given to us for a short time.
Give them life, food, shelter, educate them, teach them, and then let them fly.
They will go away some day and you will stay home with your spouse.
Your spouse is #1, not the child.
And never do for the kid what he or she can do himself/herself.
Blessings!
I started a Family Contracting Company 25 years ago, Between the Fire Department Job and this Family Job I beat myself to damn near death. What I am saying is Delegate but never ever take your hands completely off the Wheel so to speak.
I love you guys, thank you for sharing with us and giving some positivity and good direction in reality. One of the only UA-cam channels I feel a "family" aspect to. Hopefully we're all on the same train trying to do well and be strong simultaneously. The openness and vulnerable talks only accent the Alpha in you both
I'm glad you like this type of content Nate. We both feel that there should be more of this. Thank you for sharing.
Those types of conversations are highly important to keep the pillars of your relationship strong. And I'm glad that you two are sharing those realities with your followers/Patreons/Communities. It surely can assist others who are looking for answers. Bravo Zulu two both of you!
Both of you young ones are strong and are in my heart. Keep it between the ditches. Love your show.
God Bless the both of you !!! You both sacrificed so much in life, you both need a breath of fresh air from time to time.... hang in there your both deserve the best out of life !!!!
Thank you so much!
@@ShawnRyanShow no sir, Thank You and your wife !!!!
That's how you do it folks! Communication, teamwork, honesty.
I've been watching all these videos and am enjoying them . Sometimes it's good to be reminded that your not the only one in a relationship that's not perfect but as long as you're both trying it can be great.
its good to see this being addressed sooner rather than later, warms my heart. Good luck guys.
LOVE THIS SHOW ...FINALY SOMETHING REAL ,
Life is a constant struggle. Finding that person to fight along side you is the best part about a relationship. You can just tell by the way you guys look at each other that you have that. If you place family, love, compassion and communication as your top priorities then you can navigate through any obstacles life throws at you.
I’m so glad you guys did these. As a young couple it’s been really nice hearing something similar to us. Hope you can do more in the future
It's the real world man..........I applaud both of you for seeing it for what it is. You gotta lighten up and enjoy all of it.........the work and your relationship! Parenthood is an awesome responsibility..... and a full time job if the responsibility is assumed! Work will always be there and there will always be more money to be made but you should spoil your wife and child with quality time and love. You will never regret the time spent. Great video!
I appreciate that
Great work! What stands out to me is you 2 seem to have a healthy respect for each other, to allow vulnerability to rise up within your relationship. Filming it shows your commitment and accountability for your marriage. You 2 are very mature, keep going. By the way I have enjoyed your past shows due to the military "slant" , this " slant" is so Cool 😎. Keep mixing it up. By the way Candy, my wife, and I live in Chattanooga and come up to y'all's area to a BNB in Liepers Fork. God Speed!
You two are blessed to have figured this out this early in your relationship. God bless ya’s. And remember, parents don’t make children, children make parents.
Retired Army, been married 24 years. Date night is a must.
It's not just communication.
It's the understanding in the communication. It's what's being compromised, and forgiveness is tantamount. Anger is controllable for the day. That's why forgiveness is so important, on the daily. As time goes by, anger and unforgiveness start to fester and become unmanageable. That's why people want to give up on each other. They don't manage the aspects of communication, anger, and forgiveness. It's not the quaint saying of "I can't live without you!" It's the, " I have to live WITH you?!" Anyone can get along together when the 'gettings' good. That's easy. But before you get into a long-term relationship, find out what's the fighting style.... yell, scream, physical, avoidance, silent treatment?
Like mindedness is very important. It's best to be similar, but not exactly the same.
Love it I also love the view of the creek I live in Miramar Florida and I built a waterfall and koi pond just for that escape factor in the day keep up the amazing work
You Built Your House Together....Relationship Bond is the Glue. Don't Ever Give up on eachother. Now more thanever We Need Eachother. Love Your Content. GBLSS
This is a great series...Lotta folks will benefit from your sharing.
I’ve been married to my wife 25 years this year. We got married when I was in Texas at USAF tech school, Shepard AFB. We have had highs and lows! My wife has been an amazing. I got hurt removed medically, faced the bs with the VA, depression, anger, rehabilitation from my injury. Then kids, debt, just a lot of things that come with all the struggles of being a disabled vet. Communication is key! You have to know your partner is 💯 committed to you. My family sucks, her family is not much better, but together if you communicate nothing is an issue that can’t be resolved. Love your channel, keep working because marriage is work. I will say if you read this, you have to learn to separate work from home, work has hours of operation, home is just that is not about work, it’s about family and yourself. My wife has an office, she works from home, that’s exactly what that space is, work, so make sure you separate that! You can’t bring work home, or can she it’s just not healthy. God bless
Very cool to see you and your wife do this. This was a nice gift to share with couples.
Lots of wisdom spoken in this piece, as an old veteran, I will just say that control is a symptom of experiences we as vets had, control it takes its toll on those who care for you, it took 40 years for me to look for help, glad you found it quicker. As an older wiser buddy at the VA told me, the Goal is to put it in a box, and just peak inside and make sure it's still in there! great content, look forward to your work.
Communication is huge in a marriage. Keep up the good fight Shawn. I’ll be praying 🙏🏻 for the both of you.
3 little ones under 5 over here, this is info we could have used years ago! keep it up guys
I ❤ these personal moments! We can all relate. Thank you!
I was feeling like Id be single forever...till i heard your story!
Now i realize that the best times of my life havent even happened yet!
I love how real you are!!! Keep up the videos. Huge fan
@ Shawn, yall have a healthy relationship. I thoroughly enjoyed this one, it's spot on. Thankyou for sharing.
Last weeks mug “ Time to Party!”. & Glad to hear the treatment went well. Ever since since your Capone show, I’ve been really interested in it & wish I could get someone close to me in.
My husband and I watch your show together and we love it !!! It always open up more dialogue for us on your topics. Lol I love the setting too. Can't wait to see more.
I love you guys showing that your real people!
Feels good to do it.
Wow, you two are so honesr, God Bless , all of you.
Keep doing what you do.
I really love the 2 of you together on these. I like all your show's but this was a really good idea. You guy are a great couple
Such a great example of how being married is in real,life and how you should handle things.
Thank you
WoW!! This “series” is really good!
Where were you two in 1992 when my x and I needed you the most lol I wish I had learned all the things you are bringing into the forefront. Glad to see you are putting your relationship first and willing to share with everyone. 🥰 Please keep sharing, love it.
Keep these coming. We need to hear more from you. Thanks!
Beautiful! So good! Thank you for allowing us into these places! I cheer your marriage and fam on! 😀
This is a type of conversation every couple should be having.
God bless always shawn to your family ' you know your WAIRUA is overwhelming from where I'm from in the world your a man of MANA 'your humility in every interview always shines through. I'm from NZ the words in capitals Is from the maori language who are the n ative the people of new Zealand . I'm from where Willie apiatas is from . God bless
He is lord and king your never are alone
Love you guys just talking with each other. You have a "way" about the "life thing" I am proud to see you grow.
Getting REAL.... No couple is perfect, everyone has issues, but you both really love each other...and being open and transparent is amazing to see. Keep it up!
Thank you so very much for your service firstly in god
having a little one always makes ya feel guilty about doing Anything for yourselves, but you gotta make time for each other to have a healthy relationship. You guys make a great team 💪
Y’all are always honest and open, which is the opposite of most Instagram/UA-cam channels which constantly show only the perception of positive. Thank you for that. Keep up the great work.
This is great I mean you usually only see the business side of these podcasts but you have let us in to your private life it truly feels like your family are close family friends thank you for this
My grandfather told me , men make mistakes , admitting to those mistakes makes stronger. There is no I in team , we are only as strong as the people we surround our selves with. You're on the right track.
I love you guys. This is so refreshing in this world of "together forever that ends in two weeks"
I don’t know either of you personally, but you both seem to have a firm grasp on what’s the best for your family. You seem perfect for each other and I wish you both the best.