This is so dumb. The moment you have a intimate relationship, you can NEVER be friends. It doesn’t matter how healed you are or it could’ve been 3 years since you’ve seen them. Cause once you see them you get flashbacks. If they wanna come back they’ll tell you directly or vice versa. Being friends is an excuse to have you by their palm just to torture you emotionally.
Amen! It never works no matter how long it's been. You can be cordial if you happen to run into them or if they happen to come to your job while you're on the clock. However if you run into them while you are not working, it is better to not give them the time of day, mind your own business and if you feel like walking away in complete silence. The best revenge it's not Revenge itself it is living your life the way you've been living it even before they came into the picture and if you gain more success even better. However, do not get a rebound and when you choose to date again, do it because you are ready and have moved on from that person completely.
If you're friends with your ex then it doesn't give them a chance to miss you. Although, my ex is seeing someone else right now. I have the advantage of working at the same place as her, so I've been acting like I'm okay. She told me she misses calling me on the phone, and asked if we could still be friends so she can call me when she want's to talk. As much as I would love that, I told her I'm not interested in being just friends. I'm denying her the opportunity to talk to me, which will make her miss me.
If she wants someone to talk to she needs a therapist or her own friends. Being friends with ill intentions is actually doing a disservice to yourself because you are also denying your own feelings. Remember the opposite of hate is indifference and once you get into that point then you have truly moved on because you don't care if you are not in her life. When she's out of your life, then she can't use you anymore. I hope you got a different job and in a better place since it has been 2 years.
I don't know if I'd call it an advantage to work at the same place as an ex who you want to get back with. Trying to act like you're ok will only dig away at your soul and prevent you from being yourself. Bear in mind that a lot of the time when women end a relationship, it is already half a year or more since they emotionally checked out. It's a survival tactic for them which unfortunately gives them the advantage. So she is able to be herself while you're having to play the part of someone who doesn't care. I know from experience how shit that feels. I don't know how much good it will do by you rejecting her friendship whilst you remain physically present each day. I would have thought you'd need to be 100% absent in sight and mind for her to start missing you. Relegating yourself to a stranger in the background must surely feel like torture.
But why are you playing the game of trying to make her "miss you"? Let that happen naturally. Indifference is key, here. Its a natural progrssion that doesn'y involve game playing
So I build him up make him feel like an amazing man, because I know how to support the ones I love, for him ride off that confidence to find a new girl when his high off my support. No, he doesn't want me well than he doesn't get me. We can't be friends because I love him, so my romantic heart is giving in a different way than I would in friendship love. That's the problem, he can walk away whenever he wants, he'll have me till he finds his forever girl and then suddenly my friendship would be easy to discard. Because I have feelings for only him and he'd have options. Plus he still wants to be intimate as friends... Too complicated for me 😒 no thanks. 💔😭 Nobody puts my heart on reserve, it's special and it only for one. So I'll give it to someone who loves me back💘✨
Hey mgtow, make sure you don't lead yourself to growing a disdain for women. You're giving them too much power and control over how pain and suffering affects you, and that's not very "MGTOW" - Coach Adrian
I know you come from a good place but are you really suggesting to stay around somebody you’ve been involved with while they’re in a new relationship and play games so that they fall for you again? Not only that’s detrimental to someone’s self esteem but you’re setting yourself up for disappointment and best case scenario to turn yourself into the mistress .. just my opinion!
I usually agree with coach Adrian but what you say on your comment is so true and its exactly why you should not be friends for an extremely long time as if its not hurtful enough breaking up, staying friends with them knowing they're intimate with someone else while potentiontially telling you all about it is disgusting in my opinion
If you stay with your ex in the hope of getting them back it normally just becomes a tangled mess and drags out the agony. Only if there are children involved do you have to stay friends with your ex.
Indefinite no contact is good to attract an ex back if it was a lost of attraction. If there was a lost of trust, but love and attraction is still there “friendship” might be a good platform to prove you have changed. You can’t switch emotions off just because you put a new label on it. Fanta isn’t gonna turn into Coke by sticking a Coke label on it. But you will know your own situation.
That may be the route I need to take after a year apart. Sent an apology letter again and requested therapy and a chance to reconnect but she turned that down due to needing to focus on her own happiness and mental/emotional health. Suggested friendship again but she was concerned that I'd be "waiting" for something that may not be there.
I say it’s not a good idea from experience .. just like coach Adrian said those feelings don’t go away . We had ended a 2 year relationship , I was stuck asking for more attention and time and i always got hit with “ we’re just friends i don’t have to give you any of that” it just prolongs a lot of hurt . My advice would be to just leave it all alone and focus on yourself 100% i wish i would’ve went no contact in the beginning instead of begging/pleading and accepting a “friendship” overtime i saw she got cold to certain things like for example when we first broke up even as “friends” she’d get jealous and stuff . She couldn’t even go a whole day without contacting me . Now 7 months after the breakup and trying to remain “friends” we go weeks without talking and she just doesn’t care about anything concerning me . I don’t think anyone can control their emotions after being so invested .
I broke up with my ex, again because he kept repeating the same toxic behaviors as last time. Now he's finally starting to get his life together because the breakup pushed him to actually get his life together like get s job. Now I want him back, which I always wanted a relationship with him but things got too much and he wasn't changing. I told him I want to work on things and he doesn't want a relationship with anyone and wants to continue to work on himself. But wants me still in his life. Said he would never not want me in his life. It just hurts way too much and Im also mad because i've been telling him for 5 years to get his life together but it took us breaking up to do it. Not sure of remaining friends is a good idea. Hurts too much.
O shit! Same situation. It seems like im reading my own story. He fvckn fixed his life after I brokeup with him because hes been a bum for 3yrs when were together. And now he just wants to stay friends.
@@madj7152 From an outside perspective, I think he just isn't ready to be in a relationship. Maybe he wants to stay friends because he realized he lost someone good for him and is open to dating you again in the future. I won't know. If you really want to know, ask him. With that said, don't wait for him to be ready to date you. Take it as it is, be friends with him and don't pass up the opportunity to meet someone new that could be potentially be better than your ex. If it hurts to be friends with him, it's best to remove him and wish each other the best.
Could not have said it any better. I must say I enjoy the content you all provide. It inspires me in various way...to become a better person and help others who need help with the knowledge I've gain...As you say " Keep fighting the good fight". Thanks bro.
Hey Larry, Thanks for your kind words, it means a lot! Keep fueling my fire, and you can count on me to continue to fuel yours. Sincerely, Coach Adrian
I told my ex to leave me alone because he wouldn't stop giving me mixed signals and then denied it. I feel like it was a good thing because we see each other everyday.
I agree of what you've said. This video was really helpful. Also it takes a lot of maturity to any person to be friends with ex's. Friends but not too much especially if you are in a relationship just to be respectful to the person you are with. Sometimes we need to focus of ourselves in order to this because it takes a lot of effort for you if you wanted to do this. Working yourself development to grow to the relationship you had.
No you can never stay friends. They either want to stay friends with you to string you along without a commitment, found themselves a better option or to make themselves feel less guilty about breaking up with you while looking for another option and even through the friendship they will breadcrumb you because you're no longer in their close circle and because you let them. So say no to friendships with exes and if they want friends they can find their own friends.
The girl I was talking to had recently moved here. I had just gotten out of a break up. We started 2 months after she got here and we just ended things because she felt she wasn’t ready. I’ve realized the same in the last week. We see each other every day at the gym and have a positive friendship. I’ve decided to focus on myself and if we talk then we talk. If we’re both in a good position later in the year and I feel I’m ready I’d be okay to revisit but I’m not going to wait around. Thank you for this video because now more than ever I feel I’m ready for growth and having the thought that whatever happens happens. Either way I’ll be okay
So my ex of 2 1/2 years wants to visit me “as friends” and he keeps using the terminology “as friends”. At one point, it kinda sounded he was convincing himself he wanted to just be friends. At one point, it got ridiculous so I was like yeah, I get it, you never wanna be with me again, it’s cool. And he was like well, I never said never, just not now. He said he’s not looking for any relationship actually. Also, I’m 2 1/2 hours away and he was like “yeah I’ll visit you from time to time, a healthy friendship” honestly, I don’t think it’s normal for someone to travel that far for someone they don’t care about. People are telling me he probably just wants to sleep with me but he made it very clear that he would visit me regardless, whether were intimate or not, but obviously he wouldn’t mind sleeping with me. I feel like it’s good that he’s still physically attracted to me.
My God it's been one hell of an emotional roller coaster for 5 months. Even within separation was a learning experience. Finally got to a place of composure centered and confident knowing so. Re-establish communication with my wife of separation. Reintroducing myself even though I believe she's in a rebound relationship. There's also a granddaughter involved that there's a strong bond with. Had a chance to be under the same roof we lived spending time with my wife of separation and granddaughter. We had a chance to talk share stories and laugh. I had a chance to apologize for some things that I have realized over the time. We continued talking about what happened with positive energy. She even became emotional as if she was going to cry when point. That means they're still love there right? Realizing that are still things on the wall that connect us. It was just nice to finally have the experience to be able to do this finally with her. It was a great day. Any advice or thoughts?
Question: how to deal when friends and family disapprove of him getting back with me? It’s part of why my ex is hesitant, because his friends don’t like me because of the past but can’t see I’ve changed.
Originally I went HAM with the vids and just watched all of them , even the ones that were irrelevant at the time...Now though many of these videos do pertain to my present situation. This one is precisely where I am. Thank you for all the resources.
Hey coach i had a breakup for more than a month now with a girl that i've been with for 3 months she recently explained to me that she was already in love with someone else before meeting me and that she's in love with that guy when i told her goodbye on text she taught that i was cutting all ties from her but i told her that that's not the case so she told me if i wanna be friends with her to which i said ''no i'm sorry i can't be friends with someone that i had feelings for but we can still be in touch '' my question is was what i said right? i mean i still have feelings for her and i just can't have her as only a friend .
Thank u so much adrian I need this video because my ex noticed me that I have changed a lot He text me on fb But I reacted like as a friend He wants to talk to me What should I do now? Plz reply From India
@arunimabakshi1601 I am here 5 years after you posted this. I can feel your pain through the screen. It matches what I am feeling right now. I hope you Ok.
I begged and asked him for another chance to make this right. 1 month is all i ask for. even if it's as friends. so that was what he offered me. we're in LDR. and he has been nothing short of perfect and accommodating and patient. It was all my fault. I was always snapping at him, comparing him to my ex. I took him for granted. one day he snapped and asked for a break. yesterday, after 5 days apart, he broke up. said his feelings has changed. and he won't change his mind. we talked as normal after that. This morning, when I woke up, i got his message asking me how i am. I think i am able to control my emotion and show that I have truly realise my mistakes and i am willing to change. Is this a good case?
I finally spoke to my ex and we are not getting back at this time . He says he still wants his space and needs to Work on himself . It was hard for us to even talk . He wants to be friends and hang out sometimes and see how it goes . He says if i need him , or want to call him I can and if i still want to hang out at his family events . This man is concussed!! Tells his Aunty one thing but says another . Though this is hard , I’m moving on and giving this other man a chance. Glad your doing a video on this ! Thanks coach !
This weekend i saw and spent sometime with my ex, we have spoke sporadically but not too much We haven't seen each other for six months, lives far away from me and i travelled back to her town where i was previously living with her It felt natural when we saw each other, we shared a drunken kiss on the 1st night, of which she iniated I wrote her a note explaining how i have been changing things in my life, ways of thinking etc, which i know she could see when we were hanging out and also how i still feel about her. I got a message from her today saying how she is happy we are friends again but doesnt think getting back into a relationship is a "good idea for us at the moment". I respect her honesty and maybe she is right. Im writing this to say i have come to realise that being honest and open with your ex is going to help you heal as a person, especially if you recognise the mistakes you made in the 1st place
My ex told me she is always here if I need anything, she is also seeing someone else. I responded by saying I’m not interested in a friendship with you only romance if you have a change of heart let me know. After watching your video I like the perspective of the unique opportunity to get her attracted me to again. I feel like I am in a place where I can hold myself together and attract her back into my life romantically. We’ve dated for 6 years.
My ex broke up with me a year ago. We agreed to be friends and have been in contact sense. Although she continues to be a active figure in my life it makes it hard to see her as a friend. We had a argument a while ago so it took me a while to give her clarity on things that hurt her but when I tried to apologize she barely responded. I recently discover she's taken so i congratulated and stopped contacting her. I Can't stop thinking about her, I also have dreams of her. I feel like I'm going crazy
I'm so confused. After breaking up with me to move away he really wanted to be friends but is not acting hot and cold after the no contact rule. One minute he'll be chatty and the next ignore my text for days after I asked if he wanted to meet up for a coffee
Hey Sasha, This is quite common, I see this behavior on a daily basis... His heart may be telling him one thing and his head another. Would love to help you turn things around, here for you if need be: www.withmyexagain.com/coaching Best of luck either way! Sincerely, Coach Adrian
I just did this recently. My ex wanted to be friends with him. After 2 months of trying to be a friend with him. I couldn't do it. All he wanted was to have the benefits of being together...without the sex. I am trying different things & working on myself. It felt like I was moving backwards with him. I didn't like it...or how I felt doing it. I think another reason he wanted to be a friend was to keep tabs on what I was doing; and who I was he associated who. I had to end it. I have to think about my well being & my self improvement for the future.
Well my situation isn't at all difficult in another's point of view but I feel like it still might be confusing to deal with I guess you could say. I broke up with my girlfriend ( now ex) about 4 months ago. The next week after our break up she was with someone else and I just didn't know what to think I was just so confused. However its not that I don't want to be friends with her, its more like idk if I should. I don't see it as bad or good at all but I am a little confused. I can talk to her like I talk to my friends but she always brings up things from the past like how her brother did this and that and it just brings back memories. Not bad memories of course but still. Lately I've just been thinking about being her friend, and just talk and be like we used to be before we went out. And its actually been working. A lot of good things have been happening on my life lately and I can see how I've changed after this breakup. Although hearing that she is with someone new still gets me it doesn't affect me as much anymore. But I'm just in this situation where idk if being her friend is a good idea. However the way I see it is if she really cared about this relationship she would have came back and if she doesn't then its till okay live life and be happy.
The guy I was dating decided to tell me, he has to let go due to his career and kids but still wants to be friends? We hit it off and had the best dating experience with each other. We had so much in common. I was more invested emotionally than he was. He is a great guy and a great father. So much more to say but too long of a story. I am heart broken and do not understand why.
Buffey Kunkle same situation for me! We were so compatible and he looked to me for EVERYTHING.. he had 3 kids that he wanted me to even drive the parenting bus too soon and be the step mum immediately and it was utterly exhausting. He respected my boundaries and fixed everything that I questioned but something else just kept coming up out of our relationship control. We broke up 2 weeks ago and my heart break is slowly healing bc I know even if he was the best dad in the world, he wasn't enough for me. There was so much stress involved with his ex too as he had them 50/50. How long were you two together and how was your situation with him and his children? I hope you are ok and doing the no contact rule for your own self worth 💪💪
My ex said I don't think it good idea thou... How do I change this mindset, bc This I think break thru bc before no response to message and now a message and still doesn't say it over. She has doubt.
If ur girl want's to be friends with you it means that the door is open for you to get her back. It means she still love you, care about you and that you are the center in her mind still. But she's not attracted... That's the issue. don't worry! you can easy win her back. What's the best way to get her back? Leave her alone and let her come back to you. Everyone is scared of fear of loss and if you are totaly quiet she will start to think that you forgot her. sooner or later you will receive a text message where it says: How are you doing?
Ok I feel my ex feels the same about me. I think he went out there looking for something else and wants to stay friends thinking there’s a chance later on or out of guilt. Either way I’m frustrated trying to do no contact but I still fantasize about us working out one day. I want to change that though. He keeps insisting on being friends after I tell him we should stop talking. He doesn’t hit me up but I end up hitting him up when I feel like I need a fix. We don’t talk about anything but a joke here and there. He doesn’t talk to me the same way anymore. I don’t want it to be the same anymore but I feel bad after wards. I don’t know what to do anymore, I feel like sitting down with him and talking to him about it face to face. But I’m afraid I’m over reacting. I just feel so stressed out about it. Everyone says no contact but he says we can be friends and I feel it too but not now
My ex is in a rebound relationship, but she says she wants me to help her on a class project. She came over to me after we haven't talked in a month, and started yelling at me because I said that she said she didn't need my help in the first place and she acted like she never said that. And then she told me to keep being a dick then and walked off. I don't know if I should help her then just leave or not
Thanks very much for your advise my girlfriend malice me for 2 weeks and said it's over and i try the know contact even though it was killing me inside and it works just want to say keep up the good work your doing and i introduce other people to listen to you may god bless you
Hey coach, I recently had a break up with my best friend and she is talking to another ex. I’m a week into radio silence and doing a lot better already and I do want to reach out to be friends but I still definitely have feelings for her. Is it a good idea to reach out or should I wait longer so I can be ready for any possible outcome/give her time to miss me? Thanks for all the help
My Ex and I were friends for three years. We dated for two years and lived together for about a year and half. Two months of that was after he broke up with me. He said before I was finally able to move out that we are better off as friends and that he doesn’t want me out of his life.
how can i get my ex back if i have no connection to her...at least as a friend i can try to make her interest in me agein.... Cos if i dont see her i cant change nothing... so all this other you tubers who say dont be friend with your ex talk BS.....
I recently was broken up with and i still love my ex, I’m trying to remain calm and hope when we talk that we work it out but we havnt yet. She still speaks to me but she deemed her feelings have changed toward me. And that I’m too affectionate. I don’t know what to do
4:00 I feel like I'm the second Boyfriend, her ex was/is her best friend and always on the scene, making me insanely jealous. Everything I've seen suggests that her ex has been trying to win her back since before we were together (3 and a half months) now she wants to be freinds with me, I've seen her a couple times and mate flirtatious jokes/gestures, she's not pulled away. What should I do? Fight for her or accept I was possibly the rebound relationship.
Here is my situation that I need advice with. Ended a 12 yr marriage. Organically reconnected w/an old friend after 15+ years a part. Which developed in to a 2 yr long distance relationship. We like and love each other. We fly to see each other every few months. He is ready for me to relocate to him, I also have two children (ages 11 & 13). I am not ready to remarry or commit in another long term relationship. I love him. I could spend my future life with him. But I have my own fears around remarrying right now that I am choosing to work through. We have no issues otherwise. Can we still be friends? Can we still be lovers?
My ex tried this, because I care for her I tried it too. Every time I saw her in person I cried and felt like shit for days after seeing her. Not being able to interact with her in the way we used to was too hard on me emotionally and honestly lead me to thinking she would come back. We were together for 6 years.
Hey so it’s January 26th. My ex broke up with me on September 28th and the reason behind it was that it was her first real relationship and she didn’t know how to feel about it. I never tried to push the boundaries and always respected that she needed comfort before anything else. Well that soon leaded to the end of us. I didn’t talk or text her for 6 months and she saw me and public and texted me and she wants to be friends again but I don’t know if she doesn’t want to date. She said she was super sad when she saw me and always avoids going to where I work cuz it makes her sad. I just want to know if it’s the right thing to be friends. She dated someone else in between but she said he was too much and that she missed the good times with me. What do you think I should do?
My ex is back with her ex and has reached out and we are seemingly ok, how do I know if I’m just filling the void that he’s not? How start that re attraction and flirting?
Okay well she strongly suggested that she wants to stay as best friends because of all the ways I made her feel. Some things happened behind closed doors (not cheating or anything in that vocabulary) but things I believe between her and her mother. And so it had to change things between us. It wasn't easy for her because she really did love me. At this point in time I think she no longer loves me but she wants to stay as best friends because of who I am to her. She understands that it's hard for me to let go in that way but with what shes told me that's kinda the only way. So...honestly I don't know what I'm looking for cause I'm still asking the question "does she love me." It is in my belief that deep down she does but she has no choice. I just have so many unanswered questions I'm hoping you could help me with all this stress I have. I trust God with everything and I know his timing is always perfect. But I just need someone to talk to about things cause I have no idea how to cope I guess...
How to get that platform of being friends with an ex? What if they’ve suggested that in the past but due to other factors I’ve turned down those offers. And is what an ex said months ago still valid like after the break up he wanted to stay friends, a month ago he said he missed me. Are those still valid?
My girlfriend of a year and nine months and I where in the perfect relationship with no problems or anything causing concern. But out of no where she broke up with me. My girlfriend said she still loves me but that she needs to be on her own rn so she can accomplish things for herself in life and not feel like in ten years when she’s married and has kids she didn’t use the opportunity she had while young to accomplish her own things before having to worry about her husband and kids. She originally said she wanted to go on a break till the end of the quarter(10 weeks) and have no contact. After the first 11 days I called her to see if we could meet to try and fight for her back. After meeting and talking she said she needs time to think about what I said but this time hinted at trying to be friends as apposed to not talking as she originally said while she figures things out. She said that she’s not looking for anything else rn because she still loves me and that she really can see us being together forever. Idk if I should still be friends with her during this or give her space until she can maybe see us together again.
My Ex girlfriend wanted to be friends with me , and we did keeping touch for a while, I was hoping things will change and maybe possibility to get back together, But guess what: I found out ..she was sleeping with someone else, all those time we were talking ! Man up and Run .
My ex wanted to stay friends and be close. No sex due to house arrest in a recovery home. Sex never happened. He considered me his best friend. He wanted to love on me and I allowed it one day and then he was texting me daily acting like he was crazy about me. But he wants to date. No idea how with his situation. I said I wanted to be platonic friends and then he stopped texting and calling me. Didn't want to see me. Claims it has nothing to do with me not wanting to love on him. He hasn't blocked me but doesn't reply to me. I don't text but very little. Voice clips is all I've sent. Five total. He listens to them. I do want him back. This has all been very confusing
He still loves me but je don't want to be in relationship.what should i do..we were Having a 4.5 yrs serious relationship and now he says he doesn't want to be in serious relationship so he break upd with me
Me and my ex were close friends and he used to have a crush on me after months we had a relation and after 6months he broke up with me. He says that he wanna stay friends like in past and says that let's not ignore each other but he don't want to see me in real and he says he don't have feelings for me anymore What should I do? Should I stay friend with him or not?🤦♀️💔 Plz someone say me what should I do? I still have feelings for him And we just broke up 3 days ago
me and ex broke up six weeks ago after a year we both said we loved each other,but she said she couldn't be with me she texted me this morning saying im glad we are still friends xx what does that really mean if anything ? why do other coaches and other videos say its a bad idea to remain friends when you are wanting more its really confusing....
Anna Key I can relate to that, my still husband have a mistress, I told him if she found out this with me she will get mad at you nor me, he said why do you want to tell her? It means she don’t know what my still husband doing behind her back!!! Goodluck to them another lying like he did to me😂😂😂
I don't know what's best.. I wanted to win her back, she wants to be friends and says she still loves me but isn't in love, she's "seeing" this new guy.. but I'm at a point where I am emotional about this, and I don't think I could be friends, but I'm afraid if I implement the no contact as she's with this guy she'll forget about me or just be with him.. idk.
After nc period I accepted and even encouraged him to be friends, my plan is to do it so that we can meet for a few occasions, to let him see how I’m looking and notice my changes. After this, I’m going back to nc
I wish I had the strength to be okay around her. And be a good friend to her but I can't. It's really hard when you love someone so much to be ok around them without asking for love and giving the love you used to give.
I don't see how it is possible to be a friend with an ex, right away and from afar because I don't want to be there when he will have a new girlfriend. I can't, I know I have lost a real man that I let go because he has no time for me. And that I am not gonna force him to change for me. He is just like he is, he deserve to be happy, even if he say he likes to be around me that I bring him something, I have too much emotion for him, I don't want to suffer no more... so I better leave, because he will find someone that will meet his needs. And I have to move on.
We broke up about 2 months ago and now she texted me asking to be friends. I still love her and it hurts to know that she is seeing other guys. There is this strong feeling of wanting her back in my life and i am still hopeful about a future together. Is it wrong to be friends as of now?
So i took my relationship for granted, for about 4years we were on and off. We had the talk last Friday and she said that she needs to be on her own, do her thing and learn not to depend on a man anymore. She also says that she wants us to stay friends, that i rebuild her trust as a friend before anything else. I want to show her that we can be happy together but she just doesn't want anyone in her life right now and just wants to do her. I'm wondering if i should stay friends (as she wants) or go into no contact for a certain period of time and then slowly rekindle the relationship. Please help
Hello☺ I managed to be friends with my ex. For 8 months. But we always admitted that we still feel a lot for each other. We went on dates even tho he dated someone right after... I ignored her as much as possible because she lived further away. After 8 months and 8 days we started dating again. It was a lot of back and forth and drama until then. And finally a no contact phase of 5 weeks that made him miss and want me. But after a short while he was flaky. I was pulling to hard and he was undecided and eventually said we need to work on our friendship first and be normal... Then started seeing his rebound ex again but that failed very quick. We are still in touch and talk every day. Sometimes meet. He is trying to live his life and do whatever while I suffer. I feel weak and powerless and sad. I know he loves me still and out bond is undeniable but he's not acting on it. One point is the doubt of us making serious changes that led to the breakup... while I'm certain if we work together anything's possible. I don't know what to do... I miss him so much that my whole body aches. I feel pathetic for writing these words out to the world to read it but I seriously need help. I'm in it so deep I can't see the light on this rabbit hole...
Hello Alice, I know this time can be very difficult but I would suggest for you to be less available and focus on you right now. Concentrate on getting back to a positive insight and show him something new. We are more than happy to guide you through this. www.withmyexagain.com/coaching/ Best, Coach Adrian
What if you literally just want to be friends? I don't want them back as a partner, but I would like to remain friends. It's a 15yr relationship break up with a lot of love remaining, but not the kind to rekindle the "relationship". I'm not moving on relationship wise, instead I'm following a spiritual path to find the authentic me, which will take a while to get some renewed traction. I might hit the pick scene, but to honest I'm not all that bothered for now.
Been in no contact with me ex for 2 months. Yesterday i contacted her and we talked alot. But then today she just friendzoned me. She's currently talking with lot of guys said it's better to be friends with me. I thought all this time that she is just waiting for me to talk to her (she dumped me for another dude last may 13). Guess it's time for me to take care of myself and go in with life. I still have stuff to do in college. Graduating student and i want to have my first job soon. I just hope that this will not affect my studies again. I just don't want to be friends with her and it will not work for the both of us.
I don't think I could stay friend with my ex because he still writing me and he is still in love with me.I just want him to find a woman and love her Sending Love and healing to all
Me and my ex partner were inseparable for a year. But we would always fight over him hanging out with girls one on one. He especially wanted to hang out this one girl that he liked before me. I told him that I didn’t like it and he said that I was pushing him back and changing his personality. So I broke up with him and two weeks later he wanted me back. So I opened up and then a week later he said that he wanted to be friends and be there for each other. I don’t want to be friends with him because he has found someone new. I have to see him almost everyday but every time I look at him he makes me sick. It hurts a lot more too because he is flirting with everyone.
we were friends at the beginning then we became a couple then we broke up she said she loves me then a week later she said she doesn't anymore she told me its not me but her and we became friends again but i want her back. what sould it do? I live in Washington State and she lives is LA. Our plan was that I go and see her On the Feb 25th and she also has a very important registered nurse exam on the Feb 24th and now she had to push her exam coz she can't fucos. right now all i can think about is that she needs space even though she told me she doesn't needs space and time to fucos on her exam. now that she just broke up with me and became friends again. my plan is that im still going to LA and hope she will try and talk to me what should i do I want her back
Hey!:) My ex and i remaind friends with benefits for some years, mainly because i perceived him as lower than me, but over time he has changed and i like him now. I said i'm sorry for being a jerk over the years and that i now see him differently. He said he doesn't see that. I really think we match now and i see a beautiful relationship that we never had, but i think he is still bitter and will never accept me.We last talked 10 days ago. I don't know If i should hope any more. What do you think? Thanks!:)
You truly are best in giving advises. Thank you soo much for this video. This is surely gonna help me in a lot. Love you bro. You are god to me. Thanks. Thanks again. Thanks a lot.
It's actually sad me a part, after 3 months of breaking up, and my ex come back, and we been sleeping together, when I touch his hands, he pushed away and I drive back home, and the next following day I was the one text him, and ask for apologize 😔, and told me he couldn't do that anymore, at the same time, we about to lunch our business, we will see each other often, how I'm gonna deal with this situation? And I felt broke.
My question is, what dies it mean when an ex says he doesn't know what we are? He wants to stay in my life but I asked him if we are friends now and he said he wasn't sure what we are. What the hell does that mean? We talk almost everyday and see each other regularly. Was intimate once. Tells me he loves me. I feel im a huge question mark to him.
I know I love my ex and I know he loves me but we moved too fast and we want different things. He has issues and pain from his 19 year marriage that was damaging us in the relationship. He couldn’t give me what I wanted and even though the breakup was hard I know that us going back to friends is better than where we were. I know he’s not the man for me. And I know he wants the best for me, he has never wanted to be friends with an ex but we genuinely care for each other so in the end, it’s sometimes better to be friends. Especially if your honest and know that person isn’t for you.
exactlyyy! my recent ex bf couldnt block his ex he was friends with and was messaging during the relationship but now that we've ended he wants to be "friends"???? like bro i cant turn off what i feel llike also my ex needs the consequences of losing someone
She told me she wants to be friends. She said she loves me, but she dnt want a relationship right now. She wants to be single. She also said she wont be faithful to me if we go back now. She asked for time. To be friends and then eventually she'll come back to me. Im thinking about cutting comunication. I love this woman but I cant do what she ask of me... What do you think? What should I do to get her back? No contact?
Andres Carrasquillo bro it’s crazy I’m almost in the same boat as you.. my girl loves me but not the same and she feel we need some space so she could think about things so i think the best thing we could do is just give them the space they need so they could miss us and understand how important we really are when we’re in their life. And hey if she decides to move on and see someone else then it wasnt meant to be. Hopefully it works out at the end. Just be strong and 9 times outta 10 she should come to her senses and want you back
Ooo i did this to my ex/: he said he would wait for me while i think bc he wasnt treating me the same but he hlaimed" he loved me" and got a gf after 3 weeks and we dated for 3 years but he still texts me and wants to be my bestfriend
I’m in the exact same situation. My girlfriend said she still loves me but that she needs to be on her own rn so she can accomplish things for herself in life and not feel like in ten years when she’s married and has kids she didn’t use the opportunity she had while young to accomplish her own things before having to worry about her husband and kids. She originally said she wanted to go on a break till the end of the quarter(10 weeks) and have no contact. After the first 11 days I called her to see if we could meet to try and fight for her back. Afterwards she said she needed time to think but has hinted at trying to be friends while she figured things out and that she’s not looking for anything else rn because she still loves me. Idk if I should still be friends with her during this or give her space until she can maybe see us together again.
If our relationship was good or bad i just dont wanna be friends once its over with me
Exactly
This is so dumb. The moment you have a intimate relationship, you can NEVER be friends. It doesn’t matter how healed you are or it could’ve been 3 years since you’ve seen them. Cause once you see them you get flashbacks. If they wanna come back they’ll tell you directly or vice versa. Being friends is an excuse to have you by their palm just to torture you emotionally.
right bro it's too werid an how there not over the new person but still give off those vibes it ain't healthy an don't work at all
Dude if your ex actively tortured you emotionally then you should probably not have dated her...
Amen! It never works no matter how long it's been. You can be cordial if you happen to run into them or if they happen to come to your job while you're on the clock. However if you run into them while you are not working, it is better to not give them the time of day, mind your own business and if you feel like walking away in complete silence. The best revenge it's not Revenge itself it is living your life the way you've been living it even before they came into the picture and if you gain more success even better. However, do not get a rebound and when you choose to date again, do it because you are ready and have moved on from that person completely.
Facts
Exactly said 🎉
Well, if they dump you for someone else, it's impossible to be friends.
Unless you are strong enough mentally and physically only then should you remain friends in my opinion.
If you're friends with your ex then it doesn't give them a chance to miss you. Although, my ex is seeing someone else right now. I have the advantage of working at the same place as her, so I've been acting like I'm okay. She told me she misses calling me on the phone, and asked if we could still be friends so she can call me when she want's to talk. As much as I would love that, I told her I'm not interested in being just friends. I'm denying her the opportunity to talk to me, which will make her miss me.
How did that go for you? 😂
If she wants someone to talk to she needs a therapist or her own friends. Being friends with ill intentions is actually doing a disservice to yourself because you are also denying your own feelings. Remember the opposite of hate is indifference and once you get into that point then you have truly moved on because you don't care if you are not in her life. When she's out of your life, then she can't use you anymore. I hope you got a different job and in a better place since it has been 2 years.
I don't know if I'd call it an advantage to work at the same place as an ex who you want to get back with. Trying to act like you're ok will only dig away at your soul and prevent you from being yourself. Bear in mind that a lot of the time when women end a relationship, it is already half a year or more since they emotionally checked out. It's a survival tactic for them which unfortunately gives them the advantage. So she is able to be herself while you're having to play the part of someone who doesn't care. I know from experience how shit that feels. I don't know how much good it will do by you rejecting her friendship whilst you remain physically present each day. I would have thought you'd need to be 100% absent in sight and mind for her to start missing you. Relegating yourself to a stranger in the background must surely feel like torture.
So how did it go?
But why are you playing the game of trying to make her "miss you"? Let that happen naturally. Indifference is key, here. Its a natural progrssion that doesn'y involve game playing
Bad idea, it's like being a safety net for him or her. Fool me once, it's okay but fool me twice how dumb can I be.
So I build him up make him feel like an amazing man, because I know how to support the ones I love, for him ride off that confidence to find a new girl when his high off my support. No, he doesn't want me well than he doesn't get me. We can't be friends because I love him, so my romantic heart is giving in a different way than I would in friendship love. That's the problem, he can walk away whenever he wants, he'll have me till he finds his forever girl and then suddenly my friendship would be easy to discard. Because I have feelings for only him and he'd have options. Plus he still wants to be intimate as friends... Too complicated for me 😒 no thanks. 💔😭 Nobody puts my heart on reserve, it's special and it only for one. So I'll give it to someone who loves me back💘✨
Less attachment to women = less pain & suffering for a man.
Hey mgtow, make sure you don't lead yourself to growing a disdain for women. You're giving them too much power and control over how pain and suffering affects you, and that's not very "MGTOW" - Coach Adrian
Isn’t sticking around hoping to be a threat to he new relationship weak?
I'd say so!!
I know you come from a good place but are you really suggesting to stay around somebody you’ve been involved with while they’re in a new relationship and play games so that they fall for you again? Not only that’s detrimental to someone’s self esteem but you’re setting yourself up for disappointment and best case scenario to turn yourself into the mistress .. just my opinion!
That's what I heard
I usually agree with coach Adrian but what you say on your comment is so true and its exactly why you should not be friends for an extremely long time as if its not hurtful enough breaking up, staying friends with them knowing they're intimate with someone else while potentiontially telling you all about it is disgusting in my opinion
If you stay with your ex in the hope of getting them back it normally just becomes a tangled mess and drags out the agony. Only if there are children involved do you have to stay friends with your ex.
Indefinite no contact is good to attract an ex back if it was a lost of attraction. If there was a lost of trust, but love and attraction is still there “friendship” might be a good platform to prove you have changed. You can’t switch emotions off just because you put a new label on it. Fanta isn’t gonna turn into Coke by sticking a Coke label on it. But you will know your own situation.
That may be the route I need to take after a year apart. Sent an apology letter again and requested therapy and a chance to reconnect but she turned that down due to needing to focus on her own happiness and mental/emotional health. Suggested friendship again but she was concerned that I'd be "waiting" for something that may not be there.
But that may still be the best chance I have to show the change that I have already made.
I say it’s not a good idea from experience .. just like coach Adrian said those feelings don’t go away . We had ended a 2 year relationship , I was stuck asking for more attention and time and i always got hit with “ we’re just friends i don’t have to give you any of that” it just prolongs a lot of hurt . My advice would be to just leave it all alone and focus on yourself 100% i wish i would’ve went no contact in the beginning instead of begging/pleading and accepting a “friendship” overtime i saw she got cold to certain things like for example when we first broke up even as “friends” she’d get jealous and stuff . She couldn’t even go a whole day without contacting me . Now 7 months after the breakup and trying to remain “friends” we go weeks without talking and she just doesn’t care about anything concerning me . I don’t think anyone can control their emotions after being so invested .
I relate but its the guy who wants to be friends. He also cant go one day not speaking so.
Great advice. Meditation helps control the emotions, I'm learning. Thank you. This is the best UA-cam video about this!
I broke up with my ex, again because he kept repeating the same toxic behaviors as last time. Now he's finally starting to get his life together because the breakup pushed him to actually get his life together like get s job. Now I want him back, which I always wanted a relationship with him but things got too much and he wasn't changing. I told him I want to work on things and he doesn't want a relationship with anyone and wants to continue to work on himself. But wants me still in his life. Said he would never not want me in his life. It just hurts way too much and Im also mad because i've been telling him for 5 years to get his life together but it took us breaking up to do it. Not sure of remaining friends is a good idea. Hurts too much.
O shit! Same situation. It seems like im reading my own story. He fvckn fixed his life after I brokeup with him because hes been a bum for 3yrs when were together. And now he just wants to stay friends.
@@madj7152 From an outside perspective, I think he just isn't ready to be in a relationship. Maybe he wants to stay friends because he realized he lost someone good for him and is open to dating you again in the future. I won't know. If you really want to know, ask him. With that said, don't wait for him to be ready to date you. Take it as it is, be friends with him and don't pass up the opportunity to meet someone new that could be potentially be better than your ex. If it hurts to be friends with him, it's best to remove him and wish each other the best.
ONCE SHE AN EX THEN X HER IN UR LIFE PERIOD !
Could not have said it any better. I must say I enjoy the content you all provide. It inspires me in various way...to become a better person and help others who need help with the knowledge I've gain...As you say " Keep fighting the good fight". Thanks bro.
Hey Larry,
Thanks for your kind words, it means a lot!
Keep fueling my fire, and you can count on me to continue to fuel yours.
Sincerely,
Coach Adrian
I told my ex to leave me alone because he wouldn't stop giving me mixed signals and then denied it. I feel like it was a good thing because we see each other everyday.
Yes! It definitely was a good thing. You stood up for yourself and showed him what you stand for - Adrian
But are you guys together though? My ex wants to see me everyday too but as " friends" and i feel thats not worth it
I agree of what you've said. This video was really helpful. Also it takes a lot of maturity to any person to be friends with ex's. Friends but not too much especially if you are in a relationship just to be respectful to the person you are with. Sometimes we need to focus of ourselves in order to this because it takes a lot of effort for you if you wanted to do this. Working yourself development to grow to the relationship you had.
No you can never stay friends. They either want to stay friends with you to string you along without a commitment, found themselves a better option or to make themselves feel less guilty about breaking up with you while looking for another option and even through the friendship they will breadcrumb you because you're no longer in their close circle and because you let them. So say no to friendships with exes and if they want friends they can find their own friends.
The girl I was talking to had recently moved here. I had just gotten out of a break up. We started 2 months after she got here and we just ended things because she felt she wasn’t ready. I’ve realized the same in the last week. We see each other every day at the gym and have a positive friendship. I’ve decided to focus on myself and if we talk then we talk. If we’re both in a good position later in the year and I feel I’m ready I’d be okay to revisit but I’m not going to wait around. Thank you for this video because now more than ever I feel I’m ready for growth and having the thought that whatever happens happens. Either way I’ll be okay
So my ex of 2 1/2 years wants to visit me “as friends” and he keeps using the terminology “as friends”. At one point, it kinda sounded he was convincing himself he wanted to just be friends. At one point, it got ridiculous so I was like yeah, I get it, you never wanna be with me again, it’s cool. And he was like well, I never said never, just not now. He said he’s not looking for any relationship actually. Also, I’m 2 1/2 hours away and he was like “yeah I’ll visit you from time to time, a healthy friendship” honestly, I don’t think it’s normal for someone to travel that far for someone they don’t care about. People are telling me he probably just wants to sleep with me but he made it very clear that he would visit me regardless, whether were intimate or not, but obviously he wouldn’t mind sleeping with me. I feel like it’s good that he’s still physically attracted to me.
Any updates on this?
This is really helpful. I am good friends with my ex, in fact, we are closer now than before we broke up.
Has it going for you? Still going strong?
My God it's been one hell of an emotional roller coaster for 5 months. Even within separation was a learning experience. Finally got to a place of composure centered and confident knowing so. Re-establish communication with my wife of separation. Reintroducing myself even though I believe she's in a rebound relationship. There's also a granddaughter involved that there's a strong bond with. Had a chance to be under the same roof we lived spending time with my wife of separation and granddaughter. We had a chance to talk share stories and laugh. I had a chance to apologize for some things that I have realized over the time. We continued talking about what happened with positive energy. She even became emotional as if she was going to cry when point. That means they're still love there right? Realizing that are still things on the wall that connect us. It was just nice to finally have the experience to be able to do this finally with her. It was a great day. Any advice or thoughts?
Question: how to deal when friends and family disapprove of him getting back with me? It’s part of why my ex is hesitant, because his friends don’t like me because of the past but can’t see I’ve changed.
Thank you Sir. I was really struggling to grasp these concepts. You helped me alot.
When somebody new comes into the picture how does that play out I can’t imagine sharing. It wouldn’t be for me
Is it okay to be friends with your ex if both of them have feelings for each other but due to some reason can't be in a relationship
Originally I went HAM with the vids and just watched all of them , even the ones that were irrelevant at the time...Now though many of these videos do pertain to my present situation. This one is precisely where I am. Thank you for all the resources.
Hey coach
i had a breakup for more than a month now with a girl that i've been with for 3 months she recently explained to me that she was already in love with someone else before meeting me and that she's in love with that guy when i told her goodbye on text she taught that i was cutting all ties from her but i told her that that's not the case so she told me if i wanna be friends with her to which i said ''no i'm sorry i can't be friends with someone that i had feelings for but we can still be in touch '' my question is was what i said right? i mean i still have feelings for her and i just can't have her as only a friend .
Thank u so much adrian I need this video because my ex noticed me that I have changed a lot
He text me on fb
But I reacted like as a friend
He wants to talk to me
What should I do now? Plz reply
From India
I love my boyfriend very much...I can't live without him...he wants to break up with me but I want him with my entire life
@arunimabakshi1601 I am here 5 years after you posted this. I can feel your pain through the screen. It matches what I am feeling right now. I hope you Ok.
I begged and asked him for another chance to make this right. 1 month is all i ask for. even if it's as friends. so that was what he offered me.
we're in LDR. and he has been nothing short of perfect and accommodating and patient. It was all my fault. I was always snapping at him, comparing him to my ex. I took him for granted. one day he snapped and asked for a break. yesterday, after 5 days apart, he broke up. said his feelings has changed. and he won't change his mind.
we talked as normal after that. This morning, when I woke up, i got his message asking me how i am. I think i am able to control my emotion and show that I have truly realise my mistakes and i am willing to change. Is this a good case?
Let it go hunny
This video helps a lot coach Adrian keep up the good work :)
Thanks for you kind words Dean, it means a lot.
I finally spoke to my ex and we are not getting back at this time . He says he still wants his space and needs to Work on himself . It was hard for us to even talk . He wants to be friends and hang out sometimes and see how it goes . He says if i need him , or want to call him I can and if i still want to hang out at his family events . This man is concussed!! Tells his Aunty one thing but says another . Though this is hard , I’m moving on and giving this other man a chance. Glad your doing a video on this ! Thanks coach !
wow me too
Any update?
This weekend i saw and spent sometime with my ex, we have spoke sporadically but not too much
We haven't seen each other for six months, lives far away from me and i travelled back to her town where i was previously living with her
It felt natural when we saw each other, we shared a drunken kiss on the 1st night, of which she iniated
I wrote her a note explaining how i have been changing things in my life, ways of thinking etc, which i know she could see when we were hanging out and also how i still feel about her. I got a message from her today saying how she is happy we are friends again but doesnt think getting back into a relationship is a "good idea for us at the moment". I respect her honesty and maybe she is right. Im writing this to say i have come to realise that being honest and open with your ex is going to help you heal as a person, especially if you recognise the mistakes you made in the 1st place
My ex told me she is always here if I need anything, she is also seeing someone else. I responded by saying I’m not interested in a friendship with you only romance if you have a change of heart let me know. After watching your video I like the perspective of the unique opportunity to get her attracted me to again. I feel like I am in a place where I can hold myself together and attract her back into my life romantically. We’ve dated for 6 years.
Update?
My ex broke up with me a year ago. We agreed to be friends and have been in contact sense. Although she continues to be a active figure in my life it makes it hard to see her as a friend. We had a argument a while ago so it took me a while to give her clarity on things that hurt her but when I tried to apologize she barely responded. I recently discover she's taken so i congratulated and stopped contacting her. I Can't stop thinking about her, I also have dreams of her. I feel like I'm going crazy
I'm so confused. After breaking up with me to move away he really wanted to be friends but is not acting hot and cold after the no contact rule. One minute he'll be chatty and the next ignore my text for days after I asked if he wanted to meet up for a coffee
Hey Sasha,
This is quite common, I see this behavior on a daily basis...
His heart may be telling him one thing and his head another.
Would love to help you turn things around, here for you if need be:
www.withmyexagain.com/coaching
Best of luck either way!
Sincerely,
Coach Adrian
I just did this recently. My ex wanted to be friends with him. After 2 months of trying to be a friend with him. I couldn't do it. All he wanted was to have the benefits of being together...without the sex. I am trying different things & working on myself. It felt like I was moving backwards with him. I didn't like it...or how I felt doing it. I think another reason he wanted to be a friend was to keep tabs on what I was doing; and who I was he associated who. I had to end it. I have to think about my well being & my self improvement for the future.
What happens after you stop communicating with your ex?
update!
Well my situation isn't at all difficult in another's point of view but I feel like it still might be confusing to deal with I guess you could say. I broke up with my girlfriend ( now ex) about 4 months ago. The next week after our break up she was with someone else and I just didn't know what to think I was just so confused. However its not that I don't want to be friends with her, its more like idk if I should. I don't see it as bad or good at all but I am a little confused. I can talk to her like I talk to my friends but she always brings up things from the past like how her brother did this and that and it just brings back memories. Not bad memories of course but still. Lately I've just been thinking about being her friend, and just talk and be like we used to be before we went out. And its actually been working. A lot of good things have been happening on my life lately and I can see how I've changed after this breakup. Although hearing that she is with someone new still gets me it doesn't affect me as much anymore. But I'm just in this situation where idk if being her friend is a good idea. However the way I see it is if she really cared about this relationship she would have came back and if she doesn't then its till okay live life and be happy.
Wow this was a way more positive attitude about being friends with your ex.! I'll keep that in mind!:)
Thanks Jaime
The guy I was dating decided to tell me, he has to let go due to his career and kids but still wants to be friends? We hit it off and had the best dating experience with each other. We had so much in common. I was more invested emotionally than he was. He is a great guy and a great father. So much more to say but too long of a story. I am heart broken and do not understand why.
Buffey Kunkle same situation for me! We were so compatible and he looked to me for EVERYTHING.. he had 3 kids that he wanted me to even drive the parenting bus too soon and be the step mum immediately and it was utterly exhausting. He respected my boundaries and fixed everything that I questioned but something else just kept coming up out of our relationship control. We broke up 2 weeks ago and my heart break is slowly healing bc I know even if he was the best dad in the world, he wasn't enough for me. There was so much stress involved with his ex too as he had them 50/50. How long were you two together and how was your situation with him and his children? I hope you are ok and doing the no contact rule for your own self worth 💪💪
My ex said I don't think it good idea thou...
How do I change this mindset, bc This I think break thru bc before no response to message and now a message and still doesn't say it over. She has doubt.
If ur girl want's to be friends with you it means that the door is open for you to get her back. It means she still love you, care about you and that you are the center in her mind still. But she's not attracted... That's the issue. don't worry! you can easy win her back.
What's the best way to get her back? Leave her alone and let her come back to you. Everyone is scared of fear of loss and if you are totaly quiet she will start to think that you forgot her.
sooner or later you will receive a text message where it says: How are you doing?
Ok I feel my ex feels the same about me. I think he went out there looking for something else and wants to stay friends thinking there’s a chance later on or out of guilt. Either way I’m frustrated trying to do no contact but I still fantasize about us working out one day. I want to change that though. He keeps insisting on being friends after I tell him we should stop talking. He doesn’t hit me up but I end up hitting him up when I feel like I need a fix. We don’t talk about anything but a joke here and there. He doesn’t talk to me the same way anymore. I don’t want it to be the same anymore but I feel bad after wards. I don’t know what to do anymore, I feel like sitting down with him and talking to him about it face to face. But I’m afraid I’m over reacting. I just feel so stressed out about it. Everyone says no contact but he says we can be friends and I feel it too but not now
My ex is in a rebound relationship, but she says she wants me to help her on a class project. She came over to me after we haven't talked in a month, and started yelling at me because I said that she said she didn't need my help in the first place and she acted like she never said that. And then she told me to keep being a dick then and walked off. I don't know if I should help her then just leave or not
Thanks very much for your advise my girlfriend malice me for 2 weeks and said it's over and i try the know contact even though it was killing me inside and it works just want to say keep up the good work your doing and i introduce other people to listen to you may god bless you
Thank you Anthony! :)
-Coach Adrian
Hey coach,
I recently had a break up with my best friend and she is talking to another ex. I’m a week into radio silence and doing a lot better already and I do want to reach out to be friends but I still definitely have feelings for her. Is it a good idea to reach out or should I wait longer so I can be ready for any possible outcome/give her time to miss me? Thanks for all the help
My Ex and I were friends for three years. We dated for two years and lived together for about a year and half. Two months of that was after he broke up with me. He said before I was finally able to move out that we are better off as friends and that he doesn’t want me out of his life.
for everyone whose ex wants to be friends...its a good sign it means ur ex loves u very much
Thank you for reinforcing this. We think its a pretty good sign too! But doesn't necessarily mean that the ex "loves" you - Coach Steven
I always wondered. Are you guys all in successful relationships yourselves or these deep insights make you pickier than ever to find someone ? ☺️
how can i get my ex back if i have no connection to her...at least as a friend i can try to make her interest in me agein....
Cos if i dont see her i cant change nothing...
so all this other you tubers who say dont be friend with your ex talk BS.....
I recently was broken up with and i still love my ex, I’m trying to remain calm and hope when we talk that we work it out but we havnt yet. She still speaks to me but she deemed her feelings have changed toward me. And that I’m too affectionate. I don’t know what to do
What happened andrew crum?
4:00 I feel like I'm the second Boyfriend, her ex was/is her best friend and always on the scene, making me insanely jealous.
Everything I've seen suggests that her ex has been trying to win her back since before we were together (3 and a half months) now she wants to be freinds with me, I've seen her a couple times and mate flirtatious jokes/gestures, she's not pulled away.
What should I do? Fight for her or accept I was possibly the rebound relationship.
Here is my situation that I need advice with. Ended a 12 yr marriage. Organically reconnected w/an old friend after 15+ years a part. Which developed in to a 2 yr long distance relationship. We like and love each other. We fly to see each other every few months. He is ready for me to relocate to him, I also have two children (ages 11 & 13). I am not ready to remarry or commit in another long term relationship. I love him. I could spend my future life with him. But I have my own fears around remarrying right now that I am choosing to work through. We have no issues otherwise. Can we still be friends? Can we still be lovers?
As u said,it might be difficult since one gets insecure d and loses his calm.no contact is best
My ex tried this, because I care for her I tried it too. Every time I saw her in person I cried and felt like shit for days after seeing her.
Not being able to interact with her in the way we used to was too hard on me emotionally and honestly lead me to thinking she would come back.
We were together for 6 years.
That’s what am passing through
Hey so it’s January 26th. My ex broke up with me on September 28th and the reason behind it was that it was her first real relationship and she didn’t know how to feel about it. I never tried to push the boundaries and always respected that she needed comfort before anything else. Well that soon leaded to the end of us. I didn’t talk or text her for 6 months and she saw me and public and texted me and she wants to be friends again but I don’t know if she doesn’t want to date. She said she was super sad when she saw me and always avoids going to where I work cuz it makes her sad. I just want to know if it’s the right thing to be friends. She dated someone else in between but she said he was too much and that she missed the good times with me. What do you think I should do?
My ex is back with her ex and has reached out and we are seemingly ok, how do I know if I’m just filling the void that he’s not? How start that re attraction and flirting?
Okay well she strongly suggested that she wants to stay as best friends because of all the ways I made her feel. Some things happened behind closed doors (not cheating or anything in that vocabulary) but things I believe between her and her
mother. And so it had to change things between us. It wasn't easy for her because she really did love me. At this point in time I think she no longer loves me but she wants to stay as best friends because of who I am to her. She understands that it's hard for me to let go in that way but with what shes told me that's kinda the only way. So...honestly I don't know what I'm looking for cause I'm still asking the question "does she love me." It is in my belief that deep down she does but she has no choice. I just have so many unanswered questions I'm hoping you could help me with all this stress I have. I trust God with everything and I know his timing is always perfect. But I just need someone to talk to about things cause I have no idea how to cope I guess...
How to get that platform of being friends with an ex? What if they’ve suggested that in the past but due to other factors I’ve turned down those offers. And is what an ex said months ago still valid like after the break up he wanted to stay friends, a month ago he said he missed me. Are those still valid?
My girlfriend of a year and nine months and I where in the perfect relationship with no problems or anything causing concern. But out of no where she broke up with me. My girlfriend said she still loves me but that she needs to be on her own rn so she can accomplish things for herself in life and not feel like in ten years when she’s married and has kids she didn’t use the opportunity she had while young to accomplish her own things before having to worry about her husband and kids. She originally said she wanted to go on a break till the end of the quarter(10 weeks) and have no contact. After the first 11 days I called her to see if we could meet to try and fight for her back. After meeting and talking she said she needs time to think about what I said but this time hinted at trying to be friends as apposed to not talking as she originally said while she figures things out. She said that she’s not looking for anything else rn because she still loves me and that she really can see us being together forever. Idk if I should still be friends with her during this or give her space until she can maybe see us together again.
My Ex girlfriend wanted to be friends with me , and we did keeping touch for a while, I was hoping things will change and maybe possibility to get back together, But guess what: I found out ..she was sleeping with someone else, all those time we were talking ! Man up and Run .
One of the best suggestions I heard , thanks for this video sir , I really appreciate it ❤️
My pleasure!
Thank you so much! This really gave me different perspective. And I now know what I need to do. Thank you.
You are so welcome!
My ex wanted to stay friends and be close. No sex due to house arrest in a recovery home. Sex never happened. He considered me his best friend. He wanted to love on me and I allowed it one day and then he was texting me daily acting like he was crazy about me. But he wants to date. No idea how with his situation. I said I wanted to be platonic friends and then he stopped texting and calling me. Didn't want to see me. Claims it has nothing to do with me not wanting to love on him. He hasn't blocked me but doesn't reply to me. I don't text but very little. Voice clips is all I've sent. Five total. He listens to them. I do want him back. This has all been very confusing
Excellent coach very mature approach to life.... 😊
Glad you think so!
He still loves me but je don't want to be in relationship.what should i do..we were Having a 4.5 yrs serious relationship and now he says he doesn't want to be in serious relationship so he break upd with me
Me and my ex were close friends and he used to have a crush on me after months we had a relation and after 6months he broke up with me. He says that he wanna stay friends like in past and says that let's not ignore each other but he don't want to see me in real and he says he don't have feelings for me anymore
What should I do?
Should I stay friend with him or not?🤦♀️💔
Plz someone say me what should I do?
I still have feelings for him
And we just broke up 3 days ago
How's things now?
me and ex broke up six weeks ago after a year we both said we loved each other,but she said she couldn't be with me she texted me this morning saying im glad we are still friends xx what does that really mean if anything ? why do other coaches and other videos say its a bad idea to remain friends when you are wanting more its really confusing....
Its been years...I need to get over this...I feel like i gave her a piece of me...
Thank you! Very wise words indeed, this has helped me a lot, also cleared out a bunch of clouds blocking my mind :-)
How do you deal with an ex, who doesn't mind his current girlfriend getting jealous?? Even sympathises with them, but keeps seeing me!
Anna Key I can relate to that, my still husband have a mistress, I told him if she found out this with me she will get mad at you nor me, he said why do you want to tell her? It means she don’t know what my still husband doing behind her back!!! Goodluck to them another lying like he did to me😂😂😂
You can allways choose to be friends whit your x and have a open heart
I don't know what's best.. I wanted to win her back, she wants to be friends and says she still loves me but isn't in love, she's "seeing" this new guy.. but I'm at a point where I am emotional about this, and I don't think I could be friends, but I'm afraid if I implement the no contact as she's with this guy she'll forget about me or just be with him.. idk.
After nc period I accepted and even encouraged him to be friends, my plan is to do it so that we can meet for a few occasions, to let him see how I’m looking and notice my changes. After this, I’m going back to nc
I wish I had the strength to be okay around her. And be a good friend to her but I can't. It's really hard when you love someone so much to be ok around them without asking for love and giving the love you used to give.
I don't see how it is possible to be a friend with an ex, right away and from afar because I don't want to be there when he will have a new girlfriend. I can't, I know I have lost a real man that I let go because he has no time for me. And that I am not gonna force him to change for me. He is just like he is, he deserve to be happy, even if he say he likes to be around me that I bring him something, I have too much emotion for him, I don't want to suffer no more... so I better leave, because he will find someone that will meet his needs. And I have to move on.
They wanna be friends because they don’t want to let go
Why won’t they want to let go
We broke up about 2 months ago and now she texted me asking to be friends. I still love her and it hurts to know that she is seeing other guys. There is this strong feeling of wanting her back in my life and i am still hopeful about a future together. Is it wrong to be friends as of now?
So i took my relationship for granted, for about 4years we were on and off. We had the talk last Friday and she said that she needs to be on her own, do her thing and learn not to depend on a man anymore. She also says that she wants us to stay friends, that i rebuild her trust as a friend before anything else. I want to show her that we can be happy together but she just doesn't want anyone in her life right now and just wants to do her. I'm wondering if i should stay friends (as she wants) or go into no contact for a certain period of time and then slowly rekindle the relationship. Please help
Im going threw the exact same thing! But she was my fiancee we were together 6 years.
Same here!!!!!
Please add more content on short term relationships :)
Thanks Madnile1!
We have A LOT of short term relationships coming your way in the coming weeks.
Stay tuned,
Coach Adrian
Hello☺ I managed to be friends with my ex. For 8 months. But we always admitted that we still feel a lot for each other. We went on dates even tho he dated someone right after... I ignored her as much as possible because she lived further away. After 8 months and 8 days we started dating again. It was a lot of back and forth and drama until then. And finally a no contact phase of 5 weeks that made him miss and want me.
But after a short while he was flaky. I was pulling to hard and he was undecided and eventually said we need to work on our friendship first and be normal...
Then started seeing his rebound ex again but that failed very quick.
We are still in touch and talk every day. Sometimes meet. He is trying to live his life and do whatever while I suffer. I feel weak and powerless and sad. I know he loves me still and out bond is undeniable but he's not acting on it. One point is the doubt of us making serious changes that led to the breakup... while I'm certain if we work together anything's possible.
I don't know what to do... I miss him so much that my whole body aches. I feel pathetic for writing these words out to the world to read it but I seriously need help. I'm in it so deep I can't see the light on this rabbit hole...
Hello Alice,
I know this time can be very difficult but I would suggest for you to be less available and focus on you right now. Concentrate on getting back to a positive insight and show him something new. We are more than happy to guide you through this. www.withmyexagain.com/coaching/
Best,
Coach Adrian
I feel your pain 😔
AliceFromUnderland81 sorry you going thru this. Hope everything works out soon and he realizes how lucky he is to have a girl like you
Even though this was 1 year ago, I'm currently going through this😔well it's close to yours
It’s not a good idea if you’re married, and all of a sudden if they pop back up and friend request you.
What if you literally just want to be friends? I don't want them back as a partner, but I would like to remain friends. It's a 15yr relationship break up with a lot of love remaining, but not the kind to rekindle the "relationship". I'm not moving on relationship wise, instead I'm following a spiritual path to find the authentic me, which will take a while to get some renewed traction. I might hit the pick scene, but to honest I'm not all that bothered for now.
Been in no contact with me ex for 2 months. Yesterday i contacted her and we talked alot. But then today she just friendzoned me. She's currently talking with lot of guys said it's better to be friends with me. I thought all this time that she is just waiting for me to talk to her (she dumped me for another dude last may 13). Guess it's time for me to take care of myself and go in with life. I still have stuff to do in college. Graduating student and i want to have my first job soon. I just hope that this will not affect my studies again. I just don't want to be friends with her and it will not work for the both of us.
"To reattract them." WOW...I never saw this that way. Buy it is not a stepping stone for anything good.
Thank you for your comment, and happy to help!
Sincerely,
Coach Adrian
I don't think I could stay friend with my ex because he still writing me and he is still in love with me.I just want him to find a woman and love her Sending Love and healing to all
Checkerzzz gaming Hi maybe he wants u in his life
Me and my ex partner were inseparable for a year. But we would always fight over him hanging out with girls one on one. He especially wanted to hang out this one girl that he liked before me. I told him that I didn’t like it and he said that I was pushing him back and changing his personality. So I broke up with him and two weeks later he wanted me back. So I opened up and then a week later he said that he wanted to be friends and be there for each other. I don’t want to be friends with him because he has found someone new. I have to see him almost everyday but every time I look at him he makes me sick. It hurts a lot more too because he is flirting with everyone.
Thank you. I don't have the full answer but it was helpful
we were friends at the beginning
then we became a couple
then we broke up
she said she loves me then a week later she
said she doesn't anymore she told me its not me but her and we became friends again
but i want her back. what sould it do?
I live in Washington State and she lives is LA. Our plan was that I go and see her
On the Feb 25th and she also has a very important registered nurse exam on the Feb 24th and now she had to push her exam coz she can't fucos.
right now all i can think about is that she needs space even though she told me she doesn't needs space and time to fucos on her exam.
now that she just broke up with me and became friends again.
my plan is that im still going to LA
and hope she will try and talk to me
what should i do
I want her back
Hey!:) My ex and i remaind friends with benefits for some years, mainly because i perceived him as lower than me, but over time he has changed and i like him now. I said i'm sorry for being a jerk over the years and that i now see him differently. He said he doesn't see that. I really think we match now and i see a beautiful relationship that we never had, but i think he is still bitter and will never accept me.We last talked 10 days ago. I don't know If i should hope any more. What do you think? Thanks!:)
You truly are best in giving advises. Thank you soo much for this video. This is surely gonna help me in a lot. Love you bro. You are god to me. Thanks. Thanks again. Thanks a lot.
You are my rock my man 💪!!!! Your guys channel is very helpful 🙂
We appreciate it!
Coach Adrian
It's actually sad me a part, after 3 months of breaking up, and my ex come back, and we been sleeping together, when I touch his hands, he pushed away and I drive back home, and the next following day I was the one text him, and ask for apologize 😔, and told me he couldn't do that anymore, at the same time, we about to lunch our business, we will see each other often, how I'm gonna deal with this situation? And I felt broke.
My question is, what dies it mean when an ex says he doesn't know what we are? He wants to stay in my life but I asked him if we are friends now and he said he wasn't sure what we are. What the hell does that mean? We talk almost everyday and see each other regularly. Was intimate once. Tells me he loves me. I feel im a huge question mark to him.
I know I love my ex and I know he loves me but we moved too fast and we want different things. He has issues and pain from his 19 year marriage that was damaging us in the relationship. He couldn’t give me what I wanted and even though the breakup was hard I know that us going back to friends is better than where we were. I know he’s not the man for me. And I know he wants the best for me, he has never wanted to be friends with an ex but we genuinely care for each other so in the end, it’s sometimes better to be friends. Especially if your honest and know that person isn’t for you.
This is so much pain..that cnt be explained
exactlyyy! my recent ex bf couldnt block his ex he was friends with and was messaging during the relationship but now that we've ended he wants to be "friends"???? like bro i cant turn off what i feel llike also my ex needs the consequences of losing someone
Great advice 👍 thanks
Thanks a lot!
She told me she wants to be friends. She said she loves me, but she dnt want a relationship right now. She wants to be single. She also said she wont be faithful to me if we go back now. She asked for time. To be friends and then eventually she'll come back to me. Im thinking about cutting comunication. I love this woman but I cant do what she ask of me... What do you think? What should I do to get her back? No contact?
Andres Carrasquillo bro it’s crazy I’m almost in the same boat as you.. my girl loves me but not the same and she feel we need some space so she could think about things so i think the best thing we could do is just give them the space they need so they could miss us and understand how important we really are when we’re in their life. And hey if she decides to move on and see someone else then it wasnt meant to be. Hopefully it works out at the end. Just be strong and 9 times outta 10 she should come to her senses and want you back
Ooo i did this to my ex/: he said he would wait for me while i think bc he wasnt treating me the same but he hlaimed" he loved me" and got a gf after 3 weeks and we dated for 3 years but he still texts me and wants to be my bestfriend
Be friends bro
so how did that work out after a month..
I’m in the exact same situation. My girlfriend said she still loves me but that she needs to be on her own rn so she can accomplish things for herself in life and not feel like in ten years when she’s married and has kids she didn’t use the opportunity she had while young to accomplish her own things before having to worry about her husband and kids. She originally said she wanted to go on a break till the end of the quarter(10 weeks) and have no contact. After the first 11 days I called her to see if we could meet to try and fight for her back. Afterwards she said she needed time to think but has hinted at trying to be friends while she figured things out and that she’s not looking for anything else rn because she still loves me. Idk if I should still be friends with her during this or give her space until she can maybe see us together again.