The hard truth about making your dreams come true | Mel Robbins
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- Опубліковано 19 жов 2024
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Let's face it: you're never going to feel like doing the things you need to do.
A few years ago, I gave a TEDx talk, and in that talk, I spoke about the need to push yourself. Since then, thousands of you have written to me about this concept and we're diving into it even more in this video.
As adults, we no longer have teachers, parents, and coaches pushing us to do the things that serve us.
No one is coming.
No one is there to push you, to tell you to turn the TV off, to get out and exercise, to write the business plan for you...it's all up to you.
You're going to need to push yourself and parent yourself if you want to make your dreams come true.
And when you accept the fact that you're always going to need to give yourself a push, there's a tremendous amount of liberation.
Let me know in the comments-how do you give yourself the push to do the things you need to do (but don't feel like doing)?
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Parenting yourself. Be a parent, for yourself.
Keep moving forward that's brilliant
Yes , if you can parent yourself , you can parent someone else. And a couple of your own children. And bigger then that , you can parent a group of people and become their leader.
It's a total wake up call.
self-discipline is the hardest thing to do in a well-off world. those with much less struggle real hardships and don't have time to complain about the wrong type of dietary milk in their skimmed latte or what celebrity faked their sex tape.
@@julijakeit well said but u can meditate breathing exercises fr 5 mins from ur 24 hours n then watch this video.. it may help you.. just a kind suggestion.. however I totally agree with you..
Rule 2: Treat Yourself Like Someone You Are Responsible For Helping
And that's that, Bucko!
I absolutely agree! As someone that can be CRAZY hard on myself, it boggles my mind, how if I had seen someone else do the same things that I did, I would be patting the dude on the back and saying yo good job brother way to get out there and do shit and get shit going!
But instead, I set standards for myself so high that when I don't reach perfection or the ideal goal which I think I should be able to reach I get mad at my own self.
I have also been the kind of guy to be helping other people that can't help themselves their entire lives because I always thought "Oh I can take care of myself when the time or need arrives." But the truth is those people never wanted to change, they made me waste my time and energy and commitment into them, and they made me feel comfortable about myself since I was always in a better set up position than them.
NewUXtremeFitness i can relate heavily , currently 23 and im a mess but was trying to fix my gf of 2 1/2 years and now she is leaving me , ghosting me and now im left a mess and shes the only thing i felt good about in my life. Now im severely depressed, severe anxiety and bad insomnia wondering if my life is just too broken to fix.
@@TyroneBiggums789 Bro I just came out of a 4 year long relationship this January. Life was hell the initial month. Especially the first few days, then 2 weeks. The 2nd month things were a bit better. Then kept getting better still from there on out.
Today in September of 2019 (along with a couple of other things I did to broaden my thinking and my mind) I am the HAPPIEST I have ever been in my entire life.
The pain of heartbreak is the best and worst thing imaginable for a man. It's the worst for obvious reasons you are feeling right now. It's the best if over time you realize you can only do what you can do, which is to work on yourself and making yourself a better version than your previous self. That's what I have ended up doing and am stil following the path for.
I know it's cliched brother, but Time WILL heal everything. You just have to have patience and understanding for yourself. Don't feel sorry for yourself. Just love yourself like you would your brother/sister/mother/father going through the same thing.
I have gone from the lowest of lows at the age of 29 to the highest of highs today at the age of 30. It is never too late to improve and enjoy the quality of your own life.
@@IntellectualMuscle thanks man I really needed that , im currently 23 unemployed and living at my parents after the breakup and feeling completely hopeless but your kind words helped a little
I wish someone would have told me this 5 years ago
but well.. the best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. the second best time is now
How old are you
I love that quote
@@divit2252 26
@@Staroy You can't plant a tree when you were 6 years old. so don't worry about it. You can start now
32 old here and I still feel like a kid :/
Self sufficiency should start being taught in elementary school and continue indefinitely
Montessori is a good start
That what Boy Scouts is about...
You can’t teach everything in school. Some things are learned from experience, critical thinking, and being true to who you are. That you can’t teach in school
Robert Jones Self sufficiency should be taught at home by good parenting. Give kids wings to fly..that’s a job well done.
It is, some parents are enablers & dependency becomes habit because it’s all that’s known.
Thank u so much, I'm 40 and been wanting for someone to save me, starting today I will become that person.
Jazzitay Kreationz awesome ❤️ how is it going?
It's never too late to learn!
Thanks for writing that. I'm 38 and felt guilty to realize the same thing.
Jazzitay Kreationz - amen sister
Simon Ben Natan I’m 39. Me too! 🙈
I saw this in 2018. I was 19, almost 20. Helped set reality in. Saved me.
Its also important to be the parent you never had in case you were raised by bad or abusive parents
lJ Draws the hardest
So very true. Something I struggle with still...
That's true
True. My parents never teach me to do anything, even before college...
I feel you
"There's a tremendous amount of liberation that comes when you accept the fact that you're always going to need to give yourself a push". That kinda hit me in a right way. Thanks Mel.
The best thing is that motivation very often follows action. If you use the 5 second rule to start something you dread, 10 minutes in you suddenly "feel like it"
Such a good advice. Thanks a lot.
It's true. I put off my programming project for a week, then started and did it morning to evening for a week. And learned a ton while doing it.
Another useful cue for getting up and doing things is considering if the task at hands takes you 2 minutes to do. If it does, do it now! If you follow this advice I promise - your home, workdesk and looks will never be a mess because their maintenance consists of a ton of small changes for the better.
This is how I actually feel when I get told to wash the dishes, either by my mom or by myself out of necessity. At first I'd always feel reluctant to do it, but shortly after that, I would get into a rhythm and start to actually like what I'm doing.
I literally never feel like doing anything difficult unless I just start
So true
Reality just set in for me. I'm about to turn 35. I hope it's not too late. This did something to me. Thank you.
It’s never too late…. Ever💞
Mel you weren't screechy in that first talk. All I heard was a woman delivering a powerful message. You were amazing!
No one likes the sound of his or her own voice. I wonder if James Earl Jones or Morgan Freeman cringe when they hear their own recorded voices.
TP you are ABSOLUTLY correct
I didn’t notice any screeching. Thought it was funny and cute speech.
@@graybeard222 Even if they do, no one's going to tell Darth Vader he has a weird voice. I mean, not if they want to go on living anyway.
Don’t fking lie you stupid feminist. It was offensively screechy I almost stopped watching
This is why organized sports are so good they teach mental and physical discipline along with being a team player and the strength in not doing it all Alone
This is so true Ted. Great Comment. That's my fascination with sports and sporting achievements.
There are other aspects of self- parenting too. It includes encouraging yourself, giving yourself a pat in the back, assuring yourself that everything will be all right. Standing by yourself when the whole world is against you. We are actually already self parenting ourselves. But we are bad self parents. The small negative voice inside you that always tells you that you wont be good enough ever is the bad parent.
Samrat Sengupta truth !
Samrat Sengupta: yes. But sometimes telling yourself everything will be all right doesn't work! I'm even more injured than I was before (since my accident) because nobody helped me in the ways I need - including housing, healthcare and services. I even pat myself on the back when I've done the food shopping and put it away = exhausting; I give myself a MEGA pat on the back if I SAW everything on the list and bought it. Hope is good but sometimes actually delay KILLS.
Jenny Hughes Sorry to hear about the hell you had to go through and something tells me your ordeals aren't over yet( just guessing by your tone). I wasn't contradicting Mel. I get what Mel says here and am actually inspired to be a strict parent to myself. I am awfully lazy and unmotivated. I was just pointing out another aspect of self parenting where sometimes you need to hear a kind word to spur you up and you yourself have to do that. That's all I meant.
Your addition to Mel's advice should be higher up. If you keep telling yourself 'you're just not pushing hard enough' and never anything else, it'll ruin your self-esteem. *thumbs up*
ExtraTerrestrialDust = as above for Samrat Sengupta: yes but sometimes it REALLY helps if OTHERS give us a pat on the back = everyone needs that.
This makes me cry, cause sometimes because of the way we feel, we really do wish someone would just say it okay I'm here and I'll help you and save us..
Jesus is there for you.
@@danniegrimm
Really isn't.. Apparently I'm not worthy enough... in his or gods eyes...
If you need reasurence or answers or proof, then ask for it and in time you will receive. Because those who cry out for help shall receive it.
@@danniegrimm
Unfortunately not.. for 6 years I prayed for a child (brother or sister) and for 3 of those years I met a man and fell in love and he wanted the same with me.. for 3 Yrs lots of baby making and nothing happened.. Yet my ex partner was a horrible and nasty man causing no about of mental and emotional pain to me and those around him, plus is partner who did the same to her family and children.. They got Blessed with a child and possibly second. Apparently in Jesus and God's eyes I should have been more like my ex..
@@misslanapford9169 I can not really help you over the internet in a youtube comment. That is what church communities are for.
I can only tell you this. Many Christians use God like vending machine. "I want this, and this and this" But God is not interested to give you what you want, he wants to give you what you need to make you successful, to achieve greatness. A good parent also doesn't give their child candy just because they cry for it. To much candy makes you sick.
Instead ask God what is his plan for your life. Because his plan for you is much greater then any plan you could imagine for yourself. You said you want to be saved, then let God lead you. Trusting in God is like a dance. Let him lead you and he will show of your beauty.
This is hands down one of the single most important messages I’ve ever heard. Thanks Mel!
Hello Paula, how are you doing?
@James Hurst this isn't Tinder. Don't be a creep.
This CD has three separate relaxation/meditation sessions on it ua-cam.com/users/postUgkxzpa8CIfZcihW4Z0F_ja0QF3W9KIatrsq guided by a very pleasant and direct male voice. Unlike so many other products of its type, this CD does not have bad synthesizer music, does not feature a phony or affected style of narration, and does not make any bogus claims to be subliminal or to re-train the brain or any of that balderdash. What you get is 1. a guided meditation for getting into a pleasantly relaxed state of body awareness while taking a stroll (superb for those easing back into a fitness routine slowly after an illness or injury) 2. A nice long breath-awareness relaxation session that if followed diligently can put you into very deep states of full-body relaxation and mental calmness, and 3. a buddhist-inspired meditation session designed to help you develop and maintain feelings of loving kindness toward not just yourself and your friends, but toward people you don't even like. The CD makes no claims to be designed for advanced meditators or for buddhists or hindus/yoga practitioners looking for very deep and esoteric stuff. It is geared more toward the average person who just wants to develop the habit of relaxation and stress relief through natural, healthy means. him, if you happen to be reading this, keep up the good work fella, and I love your accent. I would also like to note that I have never fallen asleep while listening to this product. I would like to kindly suggest to the reviewer who said this CD makes him fall asleep, that he might want to get checked to see if he has a sleep disorder, or if he is simply not setting aside ample time for restful sleep at night. A healthy person getting adequate rest at night should be able to go into deep states of mental relaxation without dozing off, if not all the time, then most of the time.
If it is to be it is up to me. My mantra since I was 16.
smoothandchunky1 lovvvvvve that!!! 😘
That's short yet really poignant
Great quote!
That sounds like a good t-shirt or bumper sticker quote.
I love this so much💙💙💙💙💙
I first heard you talk about this a year ago and that saying, “parenting yourself” has never left my head. Thank you, it’s helped me make changes in my life I never thought I could.
"There's a tremendous amount of liberation that comes when you accept the fact that you're always going to need to give yourself a push" 🙌 Too true! Think I'll turn this quote into a pretty background for my laptop ☺️
One thing I learned long time ago... The only helping hand you're going to get is from the one on your other arm.
Awesome
The only way to succeed is if you help yourself otherwise your fucked if you cant do things on your own without the help of others. (Sometimes its necessary to get help but not all the time)
Lol horrible , there are people who still appreciate us, Even if we cant realize. Yes there is still people who dislike us, but who cares what other thinks right? Its time to shift your mentality, Stop watching the news they are sickening and try to feel connected with the universe. The more you love nature and people who love, the more positive people you will attract. They are there, they are just hard to find, But they will come if you are positive.
You need more likes ! You are so correct
💖💖💖
So true.
I had a really really awful childhood. My mother was never around. I started parenting myself when i was 13 yrs old...now @ 52 yrs old...i still am doing it. I am my own best "parent" because i know & understand me the best!! Booyah!!
Charlene Bernard how much do you make a year now?
Dream Dream Serene it’s not that serious. They could just say no.
You are right, I started getting off my ass and sincerely tried to do the things I always wanted to do and through my journey I’ve found people who are willing to help me out and see me progress. I thank those people. I’m not there yet, I’m still working hard, staying up late to get things done. My life is changing because I decided to do and telling/begging myself to do it.
Damn. That was good. Currently writing "Parent yourself" on a post-it note & placing on my mirror.
Erica Aguilar Yes, you’ll always have to push yourself - it’s a good reminder to have in your life everyday! Xo
@Jake State Farm calm down buddy. if this woman helped her, good. edit: i searched up that david guy. what's so intersting about him? he sounds like every instagram "motivational speaker"
HA! I did the same thing!
This just changed my life. I’ve been waiting for someone or something to help me figure it all out. But no one is coming. The only person that will show up is me. WOW 😮
Yo Melanie that’s what’s up! Lol I see you really applied this. Congrats homie!
Turning 18 next month, and moving out. This video was very inspiring and real. Thank you.
Commit to always do the right thing no matter how difficult it may be. Know that being responsible in all things is the key to a happy life. If you get bored it is because you lack responsibility. Good luck and never ever ever give up!
May God Bless You!
How are you doing now 4 yrs later?
I realize no one was ever coming to save me, when both my parents died (considered at a young age), and not one of my friends or family members gave me a hug nor supported me through my grief.my father died in front of me while I was touching him, and my mother died just after calling me and telling me she wasn't well. Both of their death was totally a surprise, one went into hospital and was told they only a few months to live, and my mother died suddenly from heart attack cause by pneumonia which she didn't even know she had, cause she already had lung disease. When she died secrets came out that has changed my relationships with my siblings forever, and made me cut off my entire family. I cried for many weeks alone, yet they would call sometime for my support and rush off phone so they wouldn't have to support me. I text everyone and told them, give your issues to GOD, don't come to me no more, cause none of y'all care a damn about me. I am alone now most of the time now, and I have peace and gets thing done and achieving. I parent myself and other peoples life is no longer my business cause mine ain't there and I ain't GOD.
All the best trust God
💪 You're very strong.
stay strong bruh! ❤️
Poet Victoria Hunter Go get it girl, your parents are watching you from up above, remember that you’re never alone.
God doesn't exist, but you do and you're powerful.
This is exactly what I needed. "No one is coming!"
Thanks Mel :)
If we have a major accident I hope the doctors/ambulance will come = must do it yourself? If there's a fire will the fire-trucks come? If a burglery will the police come - and actually DO something? If we are isolated and flat on back with pain = still nobody comes to help? I know how THAT feels and is, it's HELL.
@@jennyhughes4474 I agree, sometimes we need others to help pick us up to keep moving forward
Mel you are amazing, I love how straight talking and blunt you are. In all honesty, I have been so guilty of waiting for "something" to come into my life and push me to build the life I want to live. However you have helped me realise that this is never going to happen and for my life to change for the better, I have to start doing things now even if I don't feel like it. Thank you!
Intelligent, practical, smart, hardworking, yet a visionary and a person who is a true go getter!!
Watching this video right now is literally paradigm shifting for me.
Yup so right
Yeah!
This woman changed my life. Thank you so much and much Love from South Africa.
I agree. I've been on this trajectory all my life. I take steps, and I keep pushing myself, and I've changed, always for the better. What she's not saying is that you must take it easy with yourself, respect yourself, and love yourself. Give yourself time, too. I keep a journal. It always helps to remind yourself each day how far you've come. When I pushed myself too hard, I got into a deep depression, and sometimes you have to accept that it's not the right time, so you go and work on yourself some more,. You have to see yourself as your own director. I guess that's a form of self-parenting.
"Always gonna need to give yourself a push" !!!
Self discipline comes from self love: If you believe in your self-worth enough, you will naturally MAKE yourself do the things you NEED to do to get where you want. What's nice is that when you practice it long enough, you'll start FEELING growth, and that alone is enough to make it addictive. It DOES get easier. We'll get there :) 💪💪💪
Feel talks
Your telling everyone
to cultivate an emotion
to get motivated and
that might take too long.
You have to start studying
things that you think will
make a difference in your
life before you have the
positive emotion. You have
to go on that diet or exercise
program now if that's what
needs to be done. You take
some steps in the right direction
even if they are small ones
regardless of how you feel &
you'll probably feel more positive
because your learning things and
making progress. The jealous lion
in the jungle doesn't wait until he's
secure and well adjusted to go to
war with other lions so he can get
girls, he just does it. Sometimes
a negative emotion can motivate
you when you don't have another
emotion to motivate you and it
will turn into a more positive
emotion later. If you fail after
being motivated to do something
by a negative emotion, you will
at least have learned something
and the process of learning things
can make you more positive.
Wrong
Wow, that was beautifully written !
@@reneeharold7335 Awesome response! Thank you.
I agree with you that something positive could come out of an action fuelled by negative emotion. The danger in that though, is that one might base their reason for action on something either entirely meaningless or hurtful (if the jealous lion gets girls just to get back at an ex instead of fostering healthy relationships).
Feeling depressed and unsupported by my family was my BIGGEST motivation to work hard, save money, and GTFO ASAP. From my experience, I obviously do believe that pain can lead to motivation. BUT, ultimately i still wasn't mentally well. So although i was eventually able to physically remove myself from the toxic environment (which mentally helped me tremendously), i still had/have very unhealthy and self-harming thoughts.
I think all i meant to say back then is we should practice self-love -- even if it takes a lifetime. Now I'm not saying "don't do anything else in the meantime!" Yes, take the actions you can, but take them because you believe in them and because they feed a positive self-image/ emotion.
Excellent! This is Physics: the energy that you have to "spend" in order to make the first step, go jogging, start working is much more than the energy that you need to continue your activities. In Other words when you start something, you're halfway done, when you start moving, you're halfway done when you have motivation, you're halfway done!
I want to be her when I grow up. What a brilliant woman!
So inspired , very very helpful and encouraging. Much appreciated
Simple but such powerful advice 🔥🔥
Des Herbert She was so talking directly to me🤣
wedoebe and to me too
I seriously needed to hear this. I've been contemplating a career change for over 5 years and yet here I am in the same position.... don't get me wrong, it's a great job but it is not my dream.
It's so uncomfortable thinking about being out of work to go to school but will regret it if i don't do it.
Thanks Mel. You're always inspiring me.
This tallies with Jordan Peterson's "Treat yourself like someone you are taking care of yourself."
Great advice from both themselves.
Yes!! Was just about to mention this. In this context, Peterson also says that we have to "negotiate with ourselves".
you are just amazing Miss Mel !!!!...
Boy did I need this 40 years ago! Funny thing is, I need it even more now! Thank you!
I love you Mel. You’re saving my life !
People who are struggling with being the adult child of abuse, reparenting is a must!
GOOD WORD! *REPARENTING.*
You have no clue how this helps. As a single mom this is what I needed to hear right now.
me aswell Gina, as a single mother of 5 little raskals myself its so reliving to know that someone shares my sentiment. Much luck to you
- Brenda
finally a video that tells me to close youtube now and work. gonna do it now -_-.. keep up the good work Miss Mel
Mel's motivational speeches keeps me grounded and on track!
Life is so much easier when you actually have someone to help push you.
In a good way I mean.
Also if you have health you can do anything!
Health is a very unstable thing and not fully healthy people achieve things too. Actually, most of the people on Earth have at least one issue with their health.
Exactly if health is good u can do anything
Learning
- you make your decisions mostly by what you "feel" at that time
- you most of the times don't feel like to do what you need to do to get where you want to be
- being a teen or an adult , there's no one to parent and push you and make you do what's best for you to do at that time
- so , you have to parent yourself and give a push to yourself Everytime.
I've been watching this every few days and I think I should watch it *every morning.* SO POWERFUL - like it is common sense and we know it inside but hearing it hits different :) Thanks Mel!!
No one is coming to push you to do the things you need to do in order to be the person you are meant to be. You are that person, it's time you parent yourself and push yourself to get things done.
Love it. Thank you Mel.
Parent yourself, so true...Simple, but not easy...
If you are raised being responsible and being encouraged to make decisions on your own you will do it naturally. And some people who need to grow up so quick due to their families' hardship they will do it automatically also.
Well said ... Parent myself 🎀 love myself ...
I have realised that for 54 years I have been terrified of being an adult. I have have lived a fear based existence. This mainly came from the abusive and neglectful parenting I received. Now I recognise my fear I feel genuinely excited at stepping up and taking charge.
Hard lesson for people especially me ! I love your talks because you speak hard truth for ones best life and self ! Blessings to you!
I needed this today thank you Mel!
So grateful for you, Mel Robbins. Your podcasts have come into my life during my 2nd chapter. What a blessing. I resonate with soo much of the stories you share. I have alot of work to do on myself, so I'm working on the push. As they say...progress, not perfection.
Same here....
💯
The swearing made it somehow more real. I understand it’s offensive to some, but the few swear words you throw in sometimes are what grab my attention and listen hard because I know “sh*t got real” lol
Those that get offended by swear words tend to be the ones who do shady shit behind people's back. Never trust those that want to uphold rules that they themselves don't follow
elosmilealways LOL that’s often true. Not for every single person, and I respect anyone’s attempt to walk the straight and narrow, but I agree with you. 😂
It’s more honest. I swear all the time. A lot of people do. If it doesn’t resonate with you watch something else.
i loved the swearing personally.
Swearing in a speech is a gimmick to keep the audience's attention.
Your one smart woman Mel! Love you.. Thanks for always starting my day out with a push..a good push!
We grow up being told what to do all the time so we have a hard time motivating ourselves to be more productive. We're simply not used to doing things on our own but we can change that at any point. Great video!
Well this doesn't really apply to what path you choose. It applies to making progress on what you actually want to do.
A great example here, I love playing guitar. I really, REALLY love doing that. But I tend to get carried away and just noodle around for a hour, because it feels good to play stuff I already know. I need to kick myself into practicing something new, that I will probably enjoy in the future, but right now I really don't feel like it.
It's not so much about doing what you don't want to do, it'd about stepping out of your own comfort to get shit done
BEST speaker EVER!!! PERIOD!!!
No one is there 100% for except for you. Yes, we may have some support but we need to parent ourselves.
Resonated so well.true to it's core.no one is coming.do it for yourself.
don't wait for inspiration. force yourself to chase after it because inspiration is just like a cute girl that might smile at you at the bar but won't come over by herself.
"because inspiration is just like a cute girl that might smile at you at the bar but won't come over by herself"
That's because she is with her boyfriend!
I like this!
Life will give you hurdles, jump over them as best you can, keep moving on have a vision guys
Thanks and God bless!
Rule #2: Treat Yourself Like Someone You Are Responsible for Helping
from what list of rules?
Jordan Peterson's 12 rules for life
Hit the nail on the head for me. I really needed this. I’ve slipped into a bit of what feels like a depression after realising Ive suppressed my dreams, chose a subject I hadn’t previously done at uni (despite doing really well) and now in a job I’m not enjoying at all. I’m thinking what on earth was I thinking making those choices even though they made me happy at the time. I feel like instead of improving I do so well then just start from square one and feel like a failure and that my whole life is falling apart. Like I’m waiting for validation or permission to do something, because I’m too scared to keep trying and failing. I see other people who have their shit together and seem like they are so confident in themselves and continuously improve and evolve but I am just going round and round not sure what I’m doing or why I’m making certain decisions and have no idea how I really feel. Every time I do something I look back and think why the fuck did I do that and it’s stopping me from living my life in reality.
I agree and am so glad I found this. No one is coming to save me, this is exactly what I need to hear. However, a couple things you said in this video bothered me, that we're no longer children and our parents are no longer there to help/parent us or tell us what to do. I've always envied people who got to be children, who were raised by people who actually parented and were there for their children. Unfortunately, myself and many others never got to experience loving parents or a happy childhood. In your future talks, please don't assume everyone had that kind of upbringing or supportive families, as this just triggered a lot of painful memories. Overall this idea is a great message and I'll return to it often.
I didn't experience a neccesarily happy childhood or supportive parents, however I've made my peace with it, though I understand what you mean when you say you feel envy when you meet people who always got to be children or had supportive parents etc etc... yes, she shouldn't assume every1 had an amazing childhood or supportive parents but at the same time, if something like that triggers painful memories for you then it sounds like you need to come to terms with it, and I don't mean it in a patronizing talking-down-to-you kind of way, I mean it in a self accepting kind of way, that if you face these people again in the future and they trigger these memories you wouldn't feel envy or sadness or some negative emotion...you would just be like yeah that's how my life started but I've got my shit together and I'm gonna make my dreams (your dreams) come true. Have a good one 👌
wow. your communication skills is superb. BRAVO
This is so true.. I needed to hear this.. Im so dying for someone to push me.. But none of my friends and family are doing so.. Realization strikes! 😥😓
No one’s coming but you Mel! Thank you. This video has helped me parent and push myself when I don’t want to.
I get it, and it's good advice... though I can't help but think about the fact that 16 years ago, I moved across the country in part to get away from my parents and their nagging and negativity. I'm quite content that no one is coming...lol.
turbo2ltr I’m 18 and I’m thinking of running away once I get a scholarship because they will never let me go
Sushitrash follow your heart!
@@Terebithia when you're 40 to 50 years old, you'll think differently when you realize your parents won't be around forever. That's just reality. Best of luck in everything!
Thank you for this message
Basically you have to grow up.
Now I understand what I liked about the military and my first two jobs, they just told me what to do and I did it. Even though I remember procrastinating on jobs but in the end I always finished the job before the deadline.
Since I'm a freelancer I'm digging my own financial hole by not working only when I feel like.
Thank you for re-motivating me!
The most honest video I’ve seen thus far. Thank you.
Omg Mel Robbins!!! I'm a fan! I'm loving every word!
People push themselves and then wonder why they’re so stressed out and depressed. I never have to push myself to do anything. Everything I do I do it because I want to. If I have to push myself to do something then maybe it’s not something I actually want.
Robert Lopez I agree. I suffer from anxiety, depression, and inattentive ADHD, so doing the things I don’t like, it absolutely horrible, and it triggers symptoms of my mental illnesses. We all need someone in our life. Humans were not made to be by ourselves. We need friends, family, even professional helpers, like social workers, therapist, and coaches. I understand what she is saying, but we all need help, it makes life better
Maya Pace sorry maya you are wrong
Think about how many years humans have survived without all of that ”help”
Netasha Neuhaus people had there communities before you had mental health professionals. Humans are social creatures. People need people, so I disagree with you. People need support systems of any kind.
Netasha Neuhaus surviving and living are two TOTALLY different things. Humans cannot strive in isolation (ie, Covid)
Syn Cty oh yes they can, read, take a course, apply for new jobs ( speaking from experience) I just signed a contract for a fantastic job, work out, paint ! List goes on 🤷🏼♀️
One of the best videos on UA-cam in general. Hands down. People do NOT realize this. It took me years and I still didn't really believe it. I do NOW. From experience of waiting on a person that never showed up!!! 🙃😊
Self-responsibility is the 🔑
Thank you, I was needing to hear something like this!!!
Always be proactive, instead of reactive. Plan ahead and push yourself !
Great
Content
Thank
You
Mel
No one is coming
Parent urself
Won't feel like it
It was this very TedTalk that brought me to your channel! Still love to listen to it when I hit a bump.
BlueWind61 me too. I downloaded that TED talk of hers! Schools should teach that to those kids
I am going to watch this video many many times I needed it.
That is my favorite statement of mel robbins
Amazing Amazing Amazing Mel thank you ❤❤❤
"Nobody's coming to tell you to turn the TV off, Nobody's coming telling you to get out the door and exercise, Nobody's coming telling you to apply to that job".
Ahhh, bliss 😊
This is why I moved out in the first place 😅
and NOT telling little kids that they are always great and always get trophies. it was disastrous.
Being accountable for yourself and your achievements. Being proud and responsible.
Such a badass. Great advice. Keep it comin' Mel!
Parenting yourself! The best comprehensive way of loving yourself ever!❤🌹😍👑
i'm so used to helping myself that i'm taken aback when someone wants to help, it feels so weird when someone wants to help me.
Mel robbins thank u soooooo much I don't have words to thank u you saved my life literally by breaking the greatest barrier of my life.I was the person always waiting for perfect moment and "feeling like it" but Now
Parenting myself Now and forever 🔥🔥😍😍❤❤😘😘🥰🥰💯💯
"Discipline equals Freedom." Jocko Willink
Thank you 🙏🏾 I needed this
I gave up on myself years ago. I'm making my peace with it.
Damn it Mel you nailed it..
I am 16 and that's one of the hardest truth I learned by myself after spending 16 months figuring it out that"NO ONE CARE ABOUT YOU"
They only care about stuff that doesn't contribute to your development significantly
I felt frustrated when I realized this thought
NO ONE EVER HELP ME TO FIND MY PASSION
here I am it's 3:45am and doing every change that required...by pushing myself ( can say I no longer need to push myself cause I have my values more clear than it used to be )
Thanks Mel.......
If there is any grammatical mistake then I am sorry for it 😅and willing to improve it
People only care a little bit. The rest of the caring has to come from you. No oe cares enough to do it all for you. It hurts. Sending peace your way.
Thank you Mel, I really need this at this point in my life :)
Thank u for helping me change my life
Fuuuck Mel I don't want to do it... BUT in order to get what I want...I have to. Growing up is hard to do yet it can be done. Because I want to do better and I want to live the life I see for myself. Thanks for the wise words, I will hear your voice the next time I just don't want to. 💯💃❤️🙏
DETECTING PATTERNS in how we speak to ourselves is KEY in creating the vision of ourselves. This was key for me in early recovery, guides me in current goals, and helps those I guide. WE need to become aware of the specific phrases that continue to give us an un-easy gut reaction.
TIP: 1. Make an inventory of these statements.
2. Make it mandatory to combat this with WORDS TO YOURSELF that are accurate
and kind.
3. Create and recite an affirmation each morning, specific to you, detailing you deserve happiness.
BEST PRACTICES and WISHES to us ALL!