I liked what you said about the child owning the homework, even if it hasn't been completed. Our child's guidance counselor used to have a saying about this, I think I can remember it exactly, "Children need to experience the reasonable consequences of their actions." The consequences of homework not done isn't for the parent to experience, but rather the child.
Hey Richard, thank you for taking time out to watch the show segment and to comment. I have always done my best to help parents see that every problem can only have ONE owner and once they understand this, their stress level will actually subside a bit. One night after dinner, my son approached me and exclaimed, "Dad, I don't know what to draw on this poster for my book report!" I replied, "Wow, looks like you're having trouble deciding what to draw that was in the book. Would you like me to help you offer some ideas?" He then replied, "Yes." So I said, "Great. Let's take turns coming up with ideas for the poster... you offer the first one." He then said, "That's stupid, I want you to tell me what to draw." I said back to him, "I'm not willing to do that, but I can help if you're the first one to come up with an idea." He got mad and stomped back to his room. He emerged an hour later with a colorful poster, showing it to me with excitement saying, "Look what I did!" His poster was done, all by himself.
@@BillCorbett Great story, I can totally relate. I like the you held your ground and didn't give in. And when your guy stomped off to his room, you are kind of in that unpredictable zone and don't know what's next. Will he get an idea? Will it be good? How will the execution be? And then our kid surprises us by developing a solution without our help. Sounds like something that would happen in our family. I noticed one thing on your channel, are you still actively doing videos, or did you stop awhile back? Your stuff is good, would love to see more.
@@RichardBornemann Thank you. I believe it's the "parenting formula" for helping our children to learn problem solving skills; 1.) Hear them out and allow them to express their frustration, 2.) Ensure they have the appropriate tools (poster board and markers), 3.) Offer to help them (not do it for them), 3.) Give them the space to figure it out and finally 4.) Provide encouragement for what they accomplished. And thanks for asking about my TV show, which ran on over 400 public access TV stations across the U.S., including in South Africa and New Zealand. I ended my show in 2015 and began concentrating on working with youth workers, helping them in their work with inner city kids and gangs. Here's a short promotional video that describes some of my work: ua-cam.com/video/dKjxjriErrU/v-deo.html
@@BillCorbett I've never put it as succinctly as you, but yes, that IS the formula. We have a thing in the U.S. that kids usually do in Cub Scouts, called a Pinewood Derby Race. Actually this may be worldwide, not sure, but kids carve cars out of a block of pine and race them down an incline. It was a lot of work, but my son did a pretty solid job. Learned a lot. One of his friends I recall, was not terribly interested in the project, so his father made the complete car soup to nuts. I recall thinking that defeated the entire purpose of the project, which, with my son, took pretty much the exact steps you outlined. Thanks for the link to the site I will definitely check it out. And good speaking with you, thank you for the interaction.
Thank you for your kind comments Emani, and thank you for watching. Let me know if you need any extra help with parenting. I will have a new series of online training sessions coming soon.
That was excellent. If we want our kids to become successful adults they need to learn: FOCUS, CONFIDENCE AND DELAYED GRATIFICATION. At our house, we try to keep kids away from electronics as long as possible. We don't watch tv, we don't have one, the kids don't use smartphones, tablets, no computer games etc They do watch cartoons on youtube, but I make sure they are appropriate and not violent. Yes, they are young 3, and almost 6 so this is still easy. According to studies, the most important skill employers are looking for now is creativity. I want my kids to be creative. Many kids nowadays are bored, they don't know what to do. Try taking away electronics from your teenagers, and they totally lost, they don't know what to do with themselves. I don't want that to happen to my kids in the future. We need to teach them now the alternatives.
Your comment made my day Anna! So glad there are still parents out there who see the value in limiting entertainment electronics, and strong enough to say "enough" to their kids! I hope many parents see your comment. Please let me know if there is anything I can do to support you.
Anna Cecylia thats very true about givin opportunities to be creative. Also Its not a bad thing to "be bored". Thats when kids make things , make up stories, invent..
You are soooooo right Wendi! When children run into challenges, such as being bored, that's when new pathways are developed in the brain, problem solving abilities develop, and yes, they instead write, color, build, craft, play, run, and engage with others in so many ways. Thank you for your comment.
But that's exactly what this is all about, and you're right... we as parents coach them by setting up good habits and then reinforcing them. At no point did I ever say let them do what they want. If you give your child a chance to demonstrate what they already know, you would be amazed. But because we are right there, ready to coach them, if they make the wrong decision, we can correct them without chastising them and making them feel bad. It's all about helping them feel good about making the right choices. Thanks for watching and thanks for your comment.
That statement rubbed me the same way. This is were teaching responsibility comes into play, because it is their homework and their responsibility to complete their assignments, otherwise there will be consequences.
Absolutely! Parent involvement is key and helps you take control of their skills too and reinforcing behaviors and skills. However, there is an element of independence that should be encouraged to allow kids to learn on their own about time management, organization and getting things done.
OMG...you are sooo out of touch with the real world...You cannot tell a kid no electronic devices when the schools force you to do homework On the computer...Books are gone...now its tablets and computers only...
Nope @JackJack... totally in touch. It's easier than you might think to say no and give it to them in moderation. That means just because the school says use them, the parent is still in charge and needs to moderate the usage. I'm speaking from experienced, having raised 3 kids of my own and 3 step kids. We said no to them at certain times of the day and they lived to tell about it. Magically, now their doing it with their own kids. Thanks for watching the video and thanks for taking the time to comment. I appreciate it.
nothing we do at home is acceptable at school, we have the kids eating what they are served, but still get told things like ie you must praise every forkload of vegetables? schools dont and wont teach expectations, schools pry so hard into kids heads, it leaves you so vulnerable at home, parents are being held accountable, for things we arnt even able to parent anymore. the video is lovely, and well politically corrected. please try and understand though some schools, in some areas arnt working well and hand in hand with parents, we can teach at home thru videos as such as this, but i bet you a quid or two, schools would pick it apart. and bill spot on, we are teaching our generation of kids as you say, they are teaching thiers the same, although, its seen now as too tough, too old school on little johnny. and its not a simple NOPE to just jack either, theres a good point to that, a teacher often emails thru homework, and its scanned and emailed back. so yeah, out of touch...... agenda30?
I hate to disagree. I am a classroom teacher and a parent. There needs to be happy medium. Also teaching tour child that time in front of the screen matters is critical. My child reads both digital and good old fashioned books and he is 8. If you ask him he prefers a trip to the library and a good book. It’s all in what you teach your child.
When I tell my kids no electronics they say "sure" right away (7 and 8 years old). They are all electronically inclined at school. That means Us, parents can definitely have a control over our children and not the other way around.
I liked what you said about the child owning the homework, even if it hasn't been completed. Our child's guidance counselor used to have a saying about this, I think I can remember it exactly, "Children need to experience the reasonable consequences of their actions." The consequences of homework not done isn't for the parent to experience, but rather the child.
Hey Richard, thank you for taking time out to watch the show segment and to comment. I have always done my best to help parents see that every problem can only have ONE owner and once they understand this, their stress level will actually subside a bit. One night after dinner, my son approached me and exclaimed, "Dad, I don't know what to draw on this poster for my book report!" I replied, "Wow, looks like you're having trouble deciding what to draw that was in the book. Would you like me to help you offer some ideas?" He then replied, "Yes." So I said, "Great. Let's take turns coming up with ideas for the poster... you offer the first one." He then said, "That's stupid, I want you to tell me what to draw." I said back to him, "I'm not willing to do that, but I can help if you're the first one to come up with an idea." He got mad and stomped back to his room. He emerged an hour later with a colorful poster, showing it to me with excitement saying, "Look what I did!" His poster was done, all by himself.
@@BillCorbett Great story, I can totally relate. I like the you held your ground and didn't give in. And when your guy stomped off to his room, you are kind of in that unpredictable zone and don't know what's next. Will he get an idea? Will it be good? How will the execution be? And then our kid surprises us by developing a solution without our help. Sounds like something that would happen in our family. I noticed one thing on your channel, are you still actively doing videos, or did you stop awhile back? Your stuff is good, would love to see more.
@@RichardBornemann Thank you. I believe it's the "parenting formula" for helping our children to learn problem solving skills; 1.) Hear them out and allow them to express their frustration, 2.) Ensure they have the appropriate tools (poster board and markers), 3.) Offer to help them (not do it for them), 3.) Give them the space to figure it out and finally 4.) Provide encouragement for what they accomplished. And thanks for asking about my TV show, which ran on over 400 public access TV stations across the U.S., including in South Africa and New Zealand. I ended my show in 2015 and began concentrating on working with youth workers, helping them in their work with inner city kids and gangs. Here's a short promotional video that describes some of my work: ua-cam.com/video/dKjxjriErrU/v-deo.html
@@BillCorbett I've never put it as succinctly as you, but yes, that IS the formula. We have a thing in the U.S. that kids usually do in Cub Scouts, called a Pinewood Derby Race. Actually this may be worldwide, not sure, but kids carve cars out of a block of pine and race them down an incline. It was a lot of work, but my son did a pretty solid job. Learned a lot. One of his friends I recall, was not terribly interested in the project, so his father made the complete car soup to nuts. I recall thinking that defeated the entire purpose of the project, which, with my son, took pretty much the exact steps you outlined.
Thanks for the link to the site I will definitely check it out. And good speaking with you, thank you for the interaction.
Got an 18 months old baby girl who could already tell all the words inside her books done with her 4 books so far
Will gonna share to y'all on how and when did I start exposing her to books soon in my UA-cam channel
Ability to focus and the ability to believe in themselves.
Excellent guidance! Parents need to be coached to mould a child to be a happy and equally responsible citizen of the future. Thank you for the video!
You're welcome Sunita, thank you for taking the time to watch the video and leave your comment.
Her english is so clear, and so undertandable!!!!
I am not a parent and i do not have a girlfriend but i really want my future kids to be success and surpass me in the future
This lady is GOLD, wow.
I love your videos!!!!!! Some of the newer parenting videos these days have too much going on. thank you for posting these!!!
Thank you for your kind comments Emani, and thank you for watching. Let me know if you need any extra help with parenting. I will have a new series of online training sessions coming soon.
That was excellent. If we want our kids to become successful adults they need to learn: FOCUS, CONFIDENCE AND DELAYED GRATIFICATION. At our house, we try to keep kids away from electronics as long as possible. We don't watch tv, we don't have one, the kids don't use smartphones, tablets, no computer games etc They do watch cartoons on youtube, but I make sure they are appropriate and not violent. Yes, they are young 3, and almost 6 so this is still easy. According to studies, the most important skill employers are looking for now is creativity. I want my kids to be creative. Many kids nowadays are bored, they don't know what to do. Try taking away electronics from your teenagers, and they totally lost, they don't know what to do with themselves. I don't want that to happen to my kids in the future. We need to teach them now the alternatives.
Your comment made my day Anna! So glad there are still parents out there who see the value in limiting entertainment electronics, and strong enough to say "enough" to their kids! I hope many parents see your comment. Please let me know if there is anything I can do to support you.
Anna Cecylia thats very true about givin opportunities to be creative. Also Its not a bad thing to "be bored". Thats when kids make things , make up stories, invent..
You are soooooo right Wendi! When children run into challenges, such as being bored, that's when new pathways are developed in the brain, problem solving abilities develop, and yes, they instead write, color, build, craft, play, run, and engage with others in so many ways. Thank you for your comment.
@@bmb1506 thanks for the tip.
We have a screen free monday - thursday rule and we encourage healthy time limits on days when they can watch.
Focus, delayed gratification and confidence
Great thank you as a parent an future special ed teacher this is very helpful children need to lean Focus,Delay gratification & Confidence 👍🏽
I am a special education teacher and I can relate to many of the points mentioned.
Great segment!
Thank you for watching Joe!
Thanks very insightful.
Glad it was helpful!
Wow, words of wisdom. Thanks!
@Zawazuki Thanks for watching and for taking the time to comment.
@@BillCorbett It's an honor. I just purchased your book Love, Limits & Lessons! Thanks again. :)
@@Zawazuki Thank you so much. Let me know how I might be able to help you further.
Thank you for sharing this great stuff
Thank you
This is amazing. This insight is important
Thank you for your comment Bailee. Thanks for watching.
This is a good video thank you for sharing
Glad you enjoyed it
Thank you this is fantastic
Thank you for watching it and I'm glad it helped.
Thanks you for sharing. Very informative 😊😘😘😘
Teaching kids how to focus and believe in themselves… something my school does do I have teachers telling kids that they won’t be successful
That is sooooo sad. I'm so sorry to hear that!
Delayed gratification.
Interesting
Thanks for watching.
Sorry but my cgild doing his or her home wk is not just up to them. I have to reinforce good habits
But that's exactly what this is all about, and you're right... we as parents coach them by setting up good habits and then reinforcing them. At no point did I ever say let them do what they want. If you give your child a chance to demonstrate what they already know, you would be amazed. But because we are right there, ready to coach them, if they make the wrong decision, we can correct them without chastising them and making them feel bad. It's all about helping them feel good about making the right choices. Thanks for watching and thanks for your comment.
That statement rubbed me the same way. This is were teaching responsibility comes into play, because it is their homework and their responsibility to complete their assignments, otherwise there will be consequences.
Absolutely! Parent involvement is key and helps you take control of their skills too and reinforcing behaviors and skills. However, there is an element of independence that should be encouraged to allow kids to learn on their own about time management, organization and getting things done.
She didnt mention what you say when those kids who could do well didnt bother. As the consequences are not only for the child but for the parents too
OMG...you are sooo out of touch with the real world...You cannot tell a kid no electronic devices when the schools force you to do homework On the computer...Books are gone...now its tablets and computers only...
Nope @JackJack... totally in touch. It's easier than you might think to say no and give it to them in moderation. That means just because the school says use them, the parent is still in charge and needs to moderate the usage. I'm speaking from experienced, having raised 3 kids of my own and 3 step kids. We said no to them at certain times of the day and they lived to tell about it. Magically, now their doing it with their own kids. Thanks for watching the video and thanks for taking the time to comment. I appreciate it.
nothing we do at home is acceptable at school, we have the kids eating what they are served, but still get told things like ie you must praise every forkload of vegetables? schools dont and wont teach expectations, schools pry so hard into kids heads, it leaves you so vulnerable at home, parents are being held accountable, for things we arnt even able to parent anymore. the video is lovely, and well politically corrected. please try and understand though some schools, in some areas arnt working well and hand in hand with parents, we can teach at home thru videos as such as this, but i bet you a quid or two, schools would pick it apart.
and bill spot on, we are teaching our generation of kids as you say, they are teaching thiers the same, although, its seen now as too tough, too old school on little johnny. and its not a simple NOPE to just jack either, theres a good point to that, a teacher often emails thru homework, and its scanned and emailed back. so yeah, out of touch...... agenda30?
I hate to disagree. I am a classroom teacher and a parent. There needs to be happy medium. Also teaching tour child that time in front of the screen matters is critical. My child reads both digital and good old fashioned books and he is 8. If you ask him he prefers a trip to the library and a good book. It’s all in what you teach your child.
When I tell my kids no electronics they say "sure" right away (7 and 8 years old). They are all electronically inclined at school. That means Us, parents can definitely have a control over our children and not the other way around.