He wanted a Traditional Wife, this is what traditional wives did, she just messed up by not hiding it better. Trad wife to poverty pipeline is not fiction, its real. Be safe out there ladies.
Most of these men demanding us to conform to a "trad wife" lifestyle are not worthy enough for us to be a stay-at-home ANYTHING for them! Unless you're a multi-millionaire or have a nest egg somewhere worth millions or more in pre-marital assets, don't do it!!! At least then, you have your own money to fall back on and you don't have to hear him whine about you spending "his" money. Separate finances are a life saver.
this is a terrible thought processes. y’all niggas get married nowadays and still move selfishly. why get married to begin with if you’re not going to communicate wants and needs. communicating is far more than healthier than going behind your partners betraying their trust. just stay single
Generations of women been telling eachother 'when you go to the store, make sure you hide away a 20 at a time for when he acts up'. This comes from the time women werent allowed to own bank accounts and such. Men being delulu is of all times I guess, not just recent times
That’s STEALING. Taking money from someone without their knowledge or consent is stealing. Instead of stealing from the man you claim to love why not get up off your 🍑 and work. Y’all are so fkn lazy. Women are allowed to have bank accounts so now what’s the excuse.
@@fantym1633yes! incl an expensive engagement ring, meant for a woman to pawn when something happens. Now, males will be like 'she didnt even look at the engagement ring when I proposed; truly a keeper! She's no golddigger!'
@@fantym1633that’s where the whole “Diamonds are a girls best friend.”, came from. That man will betray you but them diamonds won’t. You can always sell them to protect yourself!
Period!!! Wth I ain’t doing that shit,the way he acted says a lot about who he is! He could have say SO many different things ,but he choose the”that’s MY MONEY THERE IS NO OURS”!! Oh wow that’s wild!let me build myself and keep for myself what I have build before the relation cause hell no!!
Let's be clear. She is not taking money from their account. She is putting aside money from the "allowance" she gets from him in order to secure her future, and judging by his reaction and "it's my money" mentality, she did the right thing! It's not difficult to comprehend🤷🏿♀️🙄
Then there's the unpaid labor of risking her life bearing/ gestating children; the unpaid labor of raising them by herself; the unpaid labor of ALL the rest of the domestic sphere: laundry, cooking, cleaning, etc. Unpaid labor is also known as indentured servitude.
This argument shows why the wife did what she did. To put your significant other on blast on the internet for the world to see over money...she didnt even cheat on you. This is just crazy.
& he didn't even notice until what? what happened? I saw some comments saying that a statement was sent to the house... which if that's the case then she should've had paperless statements to an encrypted email like proton
I am currently in this situation. Bank accounts frozen due to the divorce. I have NOTHING at 22 years together, 20 years of marriage and 1 kiddo. I work a job that barely covers my basic needs, after 30 years of working. I'm lived in my car the first 5 months. He is trying to take it all. I do believe in karma but I am also not going to be homeless.
I don't understand why they are so vicious. & this is why I have cash somewhere safe despite being belittled by many for having mistrust using banks. just like, you're locked out. there are actually a lot of benefits with certain types of accounts but all it takes is one king baby mantrum & now you're fuxxed. I'm so sick of us ✨girlies✨ being severely beaten/abused by males
The only error I see here is not sending the bank statement to a P.O. Box … my ex tried to empty and close our joint account, silly rabbit, took off work the next day and went into the bank to remove him from the account, cuz you cannot empty an account I set up! Opened a new account and closed the joint one. He texted me wondering why I did it but never once addressed him trying to do the same. So happy to now be single and child free….whew 😅 I sholl dodged that bullet!!!
They've been doing that forever for those who paid attention - but until about 50 yrs ago there weren't many other options for women except marriage d/t Coveture laws.
It's money he been giving her that she put to the side so I don't see anything wrong with it cause it's not like he appreciates all the free labor he gets
I can understand her being concerned. Because nothing lasts forever. Partners can become abusive or cheat or abandon you. She was trying to protect herself and the kids.
It's because men are contradicting themselves, they are like " i want a traditional woman" that means him working and his earnings are for both because what she's doing in the house is for both of them too, she cooks for both, cleans for both, carries his damn children for months and gives birth to them and raises them etc, he a clown
I shouldn't have laughed at your comment... it's TOO real 💀😆🤮 As long as they are louder, bigger, hit harder & are able to dominate/loom over you... THEY are in fact, correct 🫢😮💨😞
He would've lost my attention the moment all that bass entered his voice. Cuz who tf do you think you're talking to with all that rage? Like he's about to put hands on somebody. When I was a kid, I checked my own family member for that, and he hasn't tried it since.
If a man expects you or asks you to stay home with the kids, have a secret stash of money. Take about the equivalent of a babysitters cheque. The simple fact that he thinks that she's not contributing has me thinking she needs to go back to work
@@hubabaloopthat's such a good idea. I know a few men that wear wedding bands but claim not to be married. We'll never know. But guys will still try their luck.
When my parents separated in 2015, my mom took $500 from my moms & dads joint acct.. he spazzed so hard & removed my mom from the acct holder privileges .. my mom had to go to church to get food that was usually expired to be able to keep my siblings fed. I was surprised my dad had such an angry reaction .. like he didn’t pump my mother w 5 kids she hardly wanted… so she couldn’t keep working, and kept re-entering the workforce every few years as an entry-level receptionist.
She’s obviously only taking the money out, because she knows this guy has, or is about to, switch up on her and the kids. His attitude says everything.
SMH. Just goes to show they see no value in the work you do. To them it deserves no compensation, no recognition…. Matter of fact you are happy to do it and be called a wife. THAT’S your compensation. Men really see marriage as a favor to you and a come up FOR THEM.
He says we then say it's a me situation in the same rant. Men say it's about us until the divorce comes, and then they say no, it's mine and leave you with nothing on the street. They want you to stay home but then say you didn't work it's my money when the shtf. It happened to my aunt , she was left with nothing after helping him become a millionaire. So I don't think she did anything wrong, especially if she's been putting a little bit at a time away. She said I had been putting it away out of money he gave her. You can't give someone money and then get mad because she decided to save some of it.
When i got married, i kept my side savings . But we had joint checking & savings . One day, we argued & the look he gave me , i had NEVER seen before 😢. It scared me & i realized that i couldn't put MY future in HIS hands 😢. The next day, i went to the bank & opened separate accounts . 😂 # Sis only needed #one red flag 😅
If a man acts like that , that’s a red flag . If he really loves you he would have no issue because he should not have anything to worry about . If anything he should of been like that’s fine babe but honestly you got nothing to worry about but if that secures you so be it.
This comment is for the pickme's! How many is maid services? How much is child care? If he was to do the house cleaning and child care alone and work how would he do this? Not everyone has a supportive family that will help.
I really can’t even relate to this. My father raised me as a single dad. When I was very young, he taught me to never allow a man to have the position in my life to take care of me. That turns into quid pro quo real quick! Emotions are fleeting, integrity is a needle in a haystack, and contracts (including marriages) are breached all the time. I’m so happy he taught me that because I’ve never had to deal with any financial abuse.
My dad taught me too. Not by telling me but by leaving my SAH mom destitute and abandoning the family when I graduated high school. She was a sickly woman and God blessed me to be able to take care of two households until she turned 65. She now gets half his social security and I still take care of other bills for her. I could NEVER trust a man enough to put my life and security in their hands.
Is it just me, or is there a trend of women getting kicked out at the 10+ year mark? I think this is because jobs want 10 years of work history. Am I crazy?
@@fantym1633he is the one who is entitled, she's doing 5 jobs and more at the same time at home tf you're talking about, they want women to share but not them, she's sharing everything, when she's cooking she's cooking for both, when she's cleaning she's cleaning for both etc
@@fantym1633but the man doesn’t lose any SS money even if she does collect it. She can just get paid his amount if it is more than hers. He still gets his amount too.
I wonder what his reaction would be when he finds out that Mexican wives expect the check/direct deposit straight from his work into her account and then to receive allowance from her.
🤣😂 this was my mom and dad. My dad never seen or knew how much his check was because my mom paid all the bills. She'd get her check and his, pay all the bills, get groceries, put some in savings then he'd get whatever is left. This is normal for me seeing this is crazy.
$20 000 is not enough in 2024 when you’re a sahm or sahg or whatever & with kids too! So I’d have been taking more bit by bit & make sure he never finds out. And I’d have also been slowly getting skilled in something. Take evening classes… Becoz these men can switch up on you instantaneously!
The thing about men with tradwives is that they really, truly, honestly "did it all" themselves. Fact is, their kids would have been snatched into foster care, their houses would have been robbed blind, and they wouldn't have clean clothes, food, or anything else to make them available to put in those long hours. Having access to two adults' worth of labor is what allows this fellow to bring in those sweet paychecks.
Say it with me: community property 😂 She’ll still look poor on paper when they get divorced and if she’s been a trad wife she’ll have a decent argument for temp alimony plus child support for each child. Ladies, have your own back because those rainy days are cold and cruel and a final divorce settlement will take years not weeks so be prepared.
My parents got divorced (his cheating(, leaving mother w/5 kids. Awarded CS + alimony by courts - never a dime seen of it, not even from his estate, coz 2d family
I stayed w my mom while going through a rough patch, paying my way by doing legal work (was working my paralegal cert). She said she couldn't see what I was doing. I put everything in a spreadsheet and found out I was doing enough to pay her mortgage (which I got her out of) three times over. Moved to an apt 5blocks from the beach a few months later...
I will never forget the 60+ yr old woman I met whose husband left her for a younger woman. He and his mistress left town with all their money. Young ladies, you do NOT want to be in your retirement yrs having to start all over. ALWAYS HAVE A BACK-UP PLAN. DO NOT TELL A MAN YOU WILL PROVE YOUR LOVE FOR HIM BY LETTING HIM HAVE ALL BANK ACCOUNTS AND PROPERTY IN HIS NAME ONLY. It's not wrong to care about your security especially if you chose to be a SAHM. A good man will make sure you feel secure.
I’m going thru the exact same thing right now. Except for me it was over like 300$. And now I’m about to be homeless in less than 2 weeks. I just wish I had taken more. Proved me right.
When his says “my money” tells you he wants her financially dependent on him so he can hurt her and the kids. This is exactly why she needs to set money aside because he’s already making a difference between what’s mine and we as a family, which proves she needs to think about herself and the kids.
This is hard for me. In theory, she's not wrong. There shoulda been something to the side for her regardless. But to take 20k off rip and not have no discussion about it is wild to me. Maybe it's cuz I don't move that kind of money around idk. And if I'm being really frfr if he really cared about her he woulda already had something set up for her if they really didn't want her working, savings, investment fund something.... Also notice like... He was so quick to act like she don't do nothing for him, like he didn't marry her. These men make you dependant on them so they can turn around and make you feel worthless in an instant. For him to make her dependent on him then act like it's not THEIR money TOGETHER?! Chileeeeeeeeeeeee
Its not taken frrom his account. She is setting aside small amounts over a long time. She did not steal out of bank account. And absolutely, he should have been setting aside a stipend for her personnal use or disposal every month. Like a emergency fund.
She wrong. She took money from his account for personal use. If he gave her money sure its cool, if she had her own job, thats cool too. But when you take family money for personal use, you endanger the entire family.
Something that stuck out to me about their argument was when she mentioned all that she does for him and their family. He doesn't feel like she's doing anything. To him what she's doing is not worthy of payment or accolade. The work of a woman is not appreciated, whether it's domestic or an outside job. I had a partner who made my jobs seem lesser than his and made sure I knew it. You could have a "real" job and this type of man would still shit on you. Ladies, go where you are appreciated. Don't fall for the rope-a-dope.
Don't marry broke men. He's a Dusty. A provider know the importance of providing security for his Wife thus her putting away money makes sense. This is a skit most likely but an important one.
He clearly isn't broke if she is able to take 20K. Probably less than 25% of his money which is generous. What she did is fine as long as she doesn't spend it on another man and spends it on herself so she can secure herself and herself only(and children).
@@rabeechowdhury he's broke if he's angry about money. Men that are well off financially and fully provide for his family isn't hollering at his Wife over money. So many wives husbands unexpectedly die and if she hasn't put money up she could face eviction and be homeless without her husbands income to support her and her children. He should be happy she had enough sense to put money away instead of spending it foolishly.
Bonnet women saying “you gotta bet these women better dog” like she’s some kind of man. You’re not on their team, ma’am! No matter what happens, I’ll always be Team Woman. All the foul, wretched, dogged schemes and ploys that men have created since day 1 will never make them leave Team Woman. Even the transwomen are still Team Man! If men can still be all for their boys after the damage they’ve done, you can still be for your fellow woman just because you don’t like something she did. Because what is the alternative? Join Team Man? That’s called being a Pick Me!!
This is why prenups are good. Prenups are good for ladies too, ladies. They keep you safe. Although, I don't agree with her not communicating properly about her fears. He doesn't understand that she is working too without being paid. Let's add up all her jobs having his baby(1 baby surrogate is 50k), babysitting (1 kid for 14 years way over 100k) housekeeping (let's say 300 days for 18 years 540k) and personal assistant(1 year 50k). He is literally saving money. And, they know this. That's why they get married so soon after they divorce. They like free labor.
This this this!!! This is why every prenup for a family where one parent is going to stay at home should price out the cost of outsourcing all the labor they will be doing. And your number is low balling it - you can't get a surrogate for $50K, and remember a stay at home parent is also a nurse and cook, AND on call 24 hours. The sad thing is that now that women are killing it in college degrees and careers over men, some of them are starting to do their stay at home husband just as dirty, so ANY marriage where the possibility of a SAHP should include this financial evaluation in the prenup. And it should include the loss of income AND increases due to promotions the SAHP will be giving up. Of course, unless you are a millionaire there's no way to really compensate your partner should you decide to split, but people are being tossed back in the job market right now with decades long gaps in their work history, 50/50 custody and left with child support they have to go to court to collect. Just being able to see how the partner who's going to be the "earner" reacts to putting a dollar amount on the SAHP's contributions will tell you a lot you'd learn the hard way otherwise - and in time to act on it too.
@@DaryleBrown Exactly. One thing that got me is that while men have a retirement age, women Never stop working for the family. They never retire. They are the cooks, cleaners, planners and babysitters. It's rare that men do half of the chores or take care of grandkids. When I heard that and thought about it, it blew my mind because man... Its so true.
Ouuu that pick me just irritated the heck out of me. On top of taking care of the house and the children and most likely tending to her husband, she should get a job to save her own money?! 😒😒
Unfortunately , many women just want a ring . They are scared to suggest a prenup to protect THEIR assets. In their hearts , they know that many men are only there for " a come up ." 😔 The old " Why are you marrying me , if you don't trust me. Let's just call everything off ." 😌 Ladies, run if he responds that way , he essentially said " Yep , i want half of YOUR hard earned ish when i leave . " 😢
Women have been keeping rainy day funds since forever. Do you know how many times I’ve gone into my rainy day funds for my household? My husband loves that I do that. Women are savers and this is actually proof these men don’t know what a traditional relationship is.
She was justified to take the money to cover herself because as we can all see, that man clearly wouldn't have given her a dime if he could. All I have to say ladies is this is why a pre-nup is so important. If a man wants to marry me and make me a stay at home wife, then I'm getting an ironclad pre-nup so he knows from the get go that I intend to make "his" money, "our" money. I just got a significant raise and a 14% 5-figure bonus. Any man who wants me to quit that so we can squabble over money is delusional. I can be a stay at home mom if he got his paycheck automatically sending money to my own HSA, 401k, Roth IRA, and emergency savings account. 😂😂😂 I will not be caught with my pants on the ground. Nope. I've seen it happen way too many times as a cautionary tale.
Perfect. Some prenups are worthless. Most men stop working or take small part-time jobs jobs , to make sure YOU don't get a dime . Child support is a joke , they can't make the men pay & men don't mind going to jail . Like you said , it's best to have your own side job & hide YOUR money . 😊🎉
I send all my love and support to all the women out there “living” like that, you deserve better sisters,you deserve so much better. The blond woman,the Mormon, story breaks my heart,may God takes the wheel. She literally build this man’s fortune! Ladies pleas don’t ever EVER give up your power to ANYONE,husband,parents! Things can turn bad really quick!!! Let’s alone him quitting you,what about life happening to your family ,something happens to him,lost his job,died whatever,what you gonna do??! You cannot do that let’s be for real now it’s 2024 cmon we have to do better!
I can understand where the wife was coming from because there was a time in history were women were not allowed to work but at the same time when you get married you guys share money.😊
Not so much not allowed - women have always worked. It's that jobs available were severely limited to women. Coveture laws meant no property/$$ in her name, also. I was 20 & in the army before I could open an account w/o a male co-signer (who would have access to my funds). Even then, I had to get a letter from my WAC commander in order for 75% not be deducted& sent "home" to parent.
Hey everyone chill I’m just saying that in some banks also depends on the state the you are in that if you don’t claim where the money came from and it’s not in a saving account the bank will file taxes for you ( better yet sale your ass to the IRS to save themselves) food for thought 💭 yes she should put some away but also keep that in mind cause one my banks said that for my savings and I had less then 10,000 to 1,000 in and I had to call the bank about it cause was confused myself so I raised that question
On savings , you only pay taxes on the INTEREST earned on said money . For IRA'S , you only pay taxes on interest earned or if you take money out before you retire . I am a widow, after 28 yrs & I have been saving since I was single , separately 😅. After watching my Aunts , waiting until Friday when their husbands got paid , I decided that's not the life I want . Heck , what if something happens on a Tuesday, etc ? 🤔 # never put all eggs in one basket 🧺 # teach your girls 👧 😅
Next time I get married, I'm signing a pre-nup. That way, ALL money & assets that I have before marriage remain mine after divorce. If I create new businesses/get more assets post marriage, I'd get a post- nup. I don't play about my money.
A coworker of mine from a long time ago told me he got insanely pissed at his girlfriend of nearly ten years because when she left she bought a car. He didn't think she had any money, so then he was like "she was planning this". He actually tried to blow up her car. It didn't blow up just was on fire and he had to go to jail, where finally he got help and became a normal person. It goes to show though these dudes are always counting on women to be trapped and if they planned a way out, where they didn't have to go to a shelter it drives them insane. It is fine with them if women leave as long as they have to live on the streets and terrible things will happen to them.
"what do you bring to the table" when i paid rent, he didnt respect me. I bought 1000s worth of food, to this day he says ive never spent any money on him. Just dont, if u not treating him like he's the woman, he wont give you credit. Keep your money.
All the guys crowing about being providers. Is he providing for her mental, emotional and spiritual stability by losing it about the money in an account?
She messed up putting it into a bank. That would be his money too, y’all are legally married. Take the money but put it aside, not in a traceable bank 😂
His reactions of "Everything YOU do for us?!...what aggreement?....my money" and everything else are exactly why she's setting money aside from the money he gives her. He doesn't see it as the family's money that he earns and she manages, he sees it as his money that he gifts to the wife and children he supports.
When emotions are high and people are in their feelings while going through a breakup or separation, fairness and logic goes out the door. As does respect and decency. That’s why it’s important to plan and set things in order prior to discord. No one wants it to happen, but time and time again it does. I don’t hide anything from my spouse, he’s aware that I have it, but it is money separate from money from the household just for me. I don’t hold it over his head, but then again that’s an understanding we have in our relationship.
traditional marriage needs to be secured with traditional tools fin favor of the wife: prenup, dower in case divorce or man's death, part of the house in her name, part of their company on her name as to secure her future. Our grandmothers were secured with those, got expensive gifts as diamond ring or something for each child birth and if they lost the husband's support they still got something out of that marriage to carry on.
Joint accounts are fair game. Spousal IRAs are a thing. Prenuptial agreements are your friend. Even if a man is a provider or portrays himself that way or insists that you don't work, always always ALWAYS HAVE YOUR OWN and make sure its being set aside in a place he can't see, get or even know about. And finally: any man who yells at you about "his money" and says you don't contribute anything is NOT the man you want.
What’s weird is that I had church members come to my door about two months ago. I had been considering going back to church so I chatted with them a bit. They gave me a book and wanted to come back and meet with me. It was the Mormons! Now maybe this isn’t unusual idk but these guys were from out of state and only talked to me as far as I know. They left my home and never knocked on any other doors. I am single and own my own home. Maybe it’s nothing, maybe I’m paranoid, but with good reason I think. So much info is available online. So be careful who you talk to just in case they really are scouting out there. I went through too much in life to get to buying my own home that no one could throw me out of or mistreat me in. I’m not giving it up to any man.
These things are a scam and temporary. Get whatever you can out of it. Myself I don’t even blame the men because men have approached me multiple times with these arrangements especially when I was younger skinnier & much more attractive. I turned them down (I actually regretted at that time coz I was soooo broke!) but in hindsight the struggle had me build emotional strength to work at what I desired. Now I’m super skilled with multiple things going on. Sometimes we women just want to be on easy street so we can flex on IG. And these same women will look down their nose at single independent women and call you an old hag. They’ll remind you how you are alone with no husband, no kids & what’s wrong with you.., so hey choices have consequences! I say this coming from an African background. It’s ridiculous the amount of venom you get from both men & women when you’re single, independent & child free or childless (I can’t keep up with these terms)… I just try to live my life peacefully
I wish i could explain the anxiety associated with being a trad wife. It's not fun and games cos your livelihood depends solely on his moods. It's a terrible way to live. I am speaking from a place of experience.
She did the right thing based on his reaction. He wants to extract invisible labor from her: cooking, cleaning, personal shopper, sex, giving him kids, raising the kids, without thinking, what would it cost if he had to pay for these services from strangers 🤔 The answer: a lot of cash. Then after he extracted her of her invisible labor, he claims she doesn’t do anything.
Ladies when a man dont value the work you contribute to the relationship, its time to leave. If you want leave, please elevate yourself by doing work thats more rewarding whether its finding a small business or furthering your career. You actually should find another boss cuz your boss hubby aint appreciating the work you do.
Thats not cool. She should have sat down and talked to him. She wouldn't like it if the shoe were on the other foot. She did not go about this the right way🤔🫤😔.
Bro is only able to go out and follow his purpose and make money, because she stays at home and takes care of everything else. Men who are blessed to have a stay at home wife should be very, very careful. The moment she is gone, he has no clean clothes to put on his back, no socks, no food, no child care, no doctors appointment, and soon, no health, no hygiene, and no purpose. She is providing for him. She gave him children, a home and purpose. The least he can do is pay the bills and be appreciative. One thing I don't get is why not tell him? I wouldn't like the sneakiness, because it feels wrong. Ladies, if you are considering getting married to become a stay at home wife/mum, sign a contract to assure your financial stability. Men are spoiled and entitled creatures and they don't hold themselves accountable for cheating, mistreating or abandoning their wives and children.
I think if you're dependent on your husband and dont earn any income other than his, u should set something to the side. If she spent that money on clothes, bags and shoes, he wouldn't have a problem. Her setting some to the side is protection. Its practical and i see nothing wrong with it.
There should be 3 accounts: his, hers and theirs. The budget should include individual expenses. 😊 So every income needs to be divided in 4 parts: 2 for their account, 1 for hers and 1 for his.
If possible, never put yourself in a position that requires you to be reliant on another person for food and shelter… EVER! This is advice to both men and women.
She is the home manager that money is her salary, she can manage to keep her family going under the budget her husband provides and keeps the difference for herself.
Woman LISTEN if you get into a relationship or you’re married and you know that man have his name on everything HE OWNS that’s your fault. HAVE YOUR OWN SHIT ladies that way you won’t be on the internet talking about you had nothing when he left you cause he had everything in his name THATS YOUR FAULT. YOU GONNA LEARN.
He wanted a Traditional Wife, this is what traditional wives did, she just messed up by not hiding it better. Trad wife to poverty pipeline is not fiction, its real. Be safe out there ladies.
Most of these men demanding us to conform to a "trad wife" lifestyle are not worthy enough for us to be a stay-at-home ANYTHING for them! Unless you're a multi-millionaire or have a nest egg somewhere worth millions or more in pre-marital assets, don't do it!!! At least then, you have your own money to fall back on and you don't have to hear him whine about you spending "his" money. Separate finances are a life saver.
I agree
this is a terrible thought processes. y’all niggas get married nowadays and still move selfishly. why get married to begin with if you’re not going to communicate wants and needs. communicating is far more than healthier than going behind your partners betraying their trust. just stay single
I missed the part in the beginning when he said, "we out here struggling!" So, dude can't afford a traditional wife.😮
Generations of women been telling eachother 'when you go to the store, make sure you hide away a 20 at a time for when he acts up'. This comes from the time women werent allowed to own bank accounts and such. Men being delulu is of all times I guess, not just recent times
That’s STEALING. Taking money from someone without their knowledge or consent is stealing. Instead of stealing from the man you claim to love why not get up off your 🍑 and work. Y’all are so fkn lazy. Women are allowed to have bank accounts so now what’s the excuse.
Never thought about it that way ❤
It used to be common advice - but then again, it used to be common expectation for men to gift wife w/major piece of jewelry w/birth of each child.
@@fantym1633yes! incl an expensive engagement ring, meant for a woman to pawn when something happens. Now, males will be like 'she didnt even look at the engagement ring when I proposed; truly a keeper! She's no golddigger!'
@@fantym1633that’s where the whole “Diamonds are a girls best friend.”, came from. That man will betray you but them diamonds won’t. You can always sell them to protect yourself!
Time for her to make a spreadsheet and get payments in advance for the work she does for the home, kids, and him.
THHHHHHIIIIIISSSSS
l agree
Nah just stop doin it. Cause making a list is still work he can just see how dysfunctional he is without his wife
He really said she doesn't do anything!
I bet my left kidney that's not even a little bit true!
THIS.
I'd rather be single 😂😂😂😂
Same
This and more money in my pocket and no stds or other issues
Period!!! Wth I ain’t doing that shit,the way he acted says a lot about who he is! He could have say SO many different things ,but he choose the”that’s MY MONEY THERE IS NO OURS”!! Oh wow that’s wild!let me build myself and keep for myself what I have build before the relation cause hell no!!
Exactly..😮💨
Yep most women who r in relationships won't tell u ,this is their lives.yet they shame single women
she didn't steal. She took her payment for her work everyone who works needs to be paid
Exactly!
She is saving him a fortune in child care and maid services
Cook, personal assistant, SW ...
This is why I will never be a stay at home wife cause men be acting up stay independent fellow ladies
She is smart I would have put more than that in there ladies if you are gonna be a stay at home wife get a high yield savings account
Let's be clear. She is not taking money from their account.
She is putting aside money from the "allowance" she gets from him in order to secure her future, and judging by his reaction and "it's my money" mentality, she did the right thing! It's not difficult to comprehend🤷🏿♀️🙄
Literally he’s acting like she transferred $20k straight out the account. No
Exactly this!
This!!! This man have more 🚩 in him than the whole country of china! Chilllll the dusty!
@@hubabaloopbut think about it…. If that is exactly what she did then that could place an undue burden on someone to pay the bills.
Then there's the unpaid labor of risking her life bearing/ gestating children; the unpaid labor of raising them by herself; the unpaid labor of ALL the rest of the domestic sphere: laundry, cooking, cleaning, etc.
Unpaid labor is also known as indentured servitude.
It all comes down to him saying it's HIS money.
This is simply a balance of power. And he ain't happy with equality.
Exactly
This argument shows why the wife did what she did. To put your significant other on blast on the internet for the world to see over money...she didnt even cheat on you. This is just crazy.
& he didn't even notice until what? what happened? I saw some comments saying that a statement was sent to the house... which if that's the case then she should've had paperless statements to an encrypted email like proton
@@karmAnonymous🤫🫡
@@karmAnonymousExactly. That was sloppy.
"You are my husband!!" She delivered that line like she was in a Tyler Perry movie.
“It’s not ours , it’s mine”. That right there is the reason she did what she did .
💯
I am currently in this situation. Bank accounts frozen due to the divorce. I have NOTHING at 22 years together, 20 years of marriage and 1 kiddo. I work a job that barely covers my basic needs, after 30 years of working. I'm lived in my car the first 5 months. He is trying to take it all. I do believe in karma but I am also not going to be homeless.
I don't understand why they are so vicious.
& this is why I have cash somewhere safe despite being belittled by many for having mistrust using banks. just like, you're locked out.
there are actually a lot of benefits with certain types of accounts but all it takes is one king baby mantrum & now you're fuxxed. I'm so sick of us ✨girlies✨ being severely beaten/abused by males
Dang sis I'm sorry to hear that it will work in your favor it always does
I hope you doing OK. I’m sorry to hear this. Wishing you all the best.
So sorry u had to find out like this,but know u know wat to do from now on!👍🏽😊
Spacemom765 did you guys have a prenup you are getting half if he didn’t go to court my prayers are with you
The only error I see here is not sending the bank statement to a P.O. Box … my ex tried to empty and close our joint account, silly rabbit, took off work the next day and went into the bank to remove him from the account, cuz you cannot empty an account I set up! Opened a new account and closed the joint one. He texted me wondering why I did it but never once addressed him trying to do the same. So happy to now be single and child free….whew 😅 I sholl dodged that bullet!!!
They really make the case to not get married, not be a tradwife, and not habe their kids, dont they.
They've been doing that forever for those who paid attention - but until about 50 yrs ago there weren't many other options for women except marriage d/t Coveture laws.
But he just proved her point 🤷🏽♀️
It's money he been giving her that she put to the side so I don't see anything wrong with it cause it's not like he appreciates all the free labor he gets
I can understand her being concerned. Because nothing lasts forever. Partners can become abusive or cheat or abandon you. She was trying to protect herself and the kids.
It's because men are contradicting themselves, they are like " i want a traditional woman" that means him working and his earnings are for both because what she's doing in the house is for both of them too, she cooks for both, cleans for both, carries his damn children for months and gives birth to them and raises them etc, he a clown
That's right. We all know these men don't want full custody of their kids. They abandon their parental responcibilities and go make new ones.
Her first mistake was having the alternate account bank statement sent to the house 🤦🏽♀️ PO Box or my mom's address, depending on which account 😏
Exactly ! These women need to be smarter than this! 🤦🏽♀️
Yes or get online statements
or opt out of physical & "go green" (that's what the banks advertise for paperless statements & communication)
Some Moms would sell out their own daughter for a 6 pk & a cartoon of cigs . 😢😢
@@cocoace7587some would do that to hear some appraisal from their men or mommas
Bro thinks getting louder makes you more correct
Sure does think that
I shouldn't have laughed at your comment... it's TOO real 💀😆🤮
As long as they are louder, bigger, hit harder & are able to dominate/loom over you... THEY are in fact, correct 🫢😮💨😞
And he seems to think shoving a camera in her face is going to make us side with him.
😂😂
These men are throwing TANTRUMS😂
A wife that stays home, deserve a allowance👍👍👍❤️
He would've lost my attention the moment all that bass entered his voice. Cuz who tf do you think you're talking to with all that rage? Like he's about to put hands on somebody. When I was a kid, I checked my own family member for that, and he hasn't tried it since.
If a man expects you or asks you to stay home with the kids, have a secret stash of money. Take about the equivalent of a babysitters cheque. The simple fact that he thinks that she's not contributing has me thinking she needs to go back to work
Don’t get married. Get your own job. Pay your own bills. No dusties bringing drama about “his money”. Problem solved.
Yep Im getting my self a $1k wedding band and keeping it pushing. Im not available for their BS
@@hubabaloopthat's such a good idea. I know a few men that wear wedding bands but claim not to be married. We'll never know. But guys will still try their luck.
@@andreaaaslike weddind rings?
@@kattodoggo3868 yep. wedding rings
When my parents separated in 2015, my mom took $500 from my moms & dads joint acct.. he spazzed so hard & removed my mom from the acct holder privileges .. my mom had to go to church to get food that was usually expired to be able to keep my siblings fed.
I was surprised my dad had such an angry reaction .. like he didn’t pump my mother w 5 kids she hardly wanted… so she couldn’t keep working, and kept re-entering the workforce every few years as an entry-level receptionist.
She’s obviously only taking the money out, because she knows this guy has, or is about to, switch up on her and the kids. His attitude says everything.
SMH. Just goes to show they see no value in the work you do. To them it deserves no compensation, no recognition…. Matter of fact you are happy to do it and be called a wife. THAT’S your compensation. Men really see marriage as a favor to you and a come up FOR THEM.
He says we then say it's a me situation in the same rant. Men say it's about us until the divorce comes, and then they say no, it's mine and leave you with nothing on the street. They want you to stay home but then say you didn't work it's my money when the shtf. It happened to my aunt , she was left with nothing after helping him become a millionaire. So I don't think she did anything wrong, especially if she's been putting a little bit at a time away. She said I had been putting it away out of money he gave her. You can't give someone money and then get mad because she decided to save some of it.
The only thing she did wrong = forgot to get a po box 😅. Never let men know you are trying to PROTECT YOU , if/when he leaves . 😊
When i got married, i kept my side savings . But we had joint checking & savings . One day, we argued & the look he gave me , i had NEVER seen before 😢. It scared me & i realized that i couldn't put MY future in HIS hands 😢. The next day, i went to the bank & opened separate accounts . 😂 # Sis only needed #one red flag 😅
If she jus saves the money she gets from him, instead of spending it, I don’t see anything wrong with it.
Exactly. Instead of 2 pairs of jeans , buy one & save the rest 😂🎉.
That lady in red check shirt needs a good lawyer.
She should.
That story was too sad .
If a man acts like that , that’s a red flag . If he really loves you he would have no issue because he should not have anything to worry about . If anything he should of been like that’s fine babe but honestly you got nothing to worry about but if that secures you so be it.
Pretty sure she did it because she knew he had crappy behavior about "his" money 😂
This comment is for the pickme's!
How many is maid services?
How much is child care?
If he was to do the house cleaning and child care alone and work how would he do this?
Not everyone has a supportive family that will help.
At last calculation, the fees for the work a SAHM does is $375,000 per year.
I hear 90k but that was 10 years ago and inflation is about triple so I could see it.
I really can’t even relate to this. My father raised me as a single dad. When I was very young, he taught me to never allow a man to have the position in my life to take care of me. That turns into quid pro quo real quick! Emotions are fleeting, integrity is a needle in a haystack, and contracts (including marriages) are breached all the time. I’m so happy he taught me that because I’ve never had to deal with any financial abuse.
I can’t relate either…I’d be really concerned for you if you related to every video Priscilla posted
@@hubabaloop You and me both 😮💨
My dad taught me too. Not by telling me but by leaving my SAH mom destitute and abandoning the family when I graduated high school. She was a sickly woman and God blessed me to be able to take care of two households until she turned 65. She now gets half his social security and I still take care of other bills for her. I could NEVER trust a man enough to put my life and security in their hands.
It was an agreement when he signed the marriage contract, this is why you get married ladies🙏🏾
Now she knows, she's ready to go 😁
Is it just me, or is there a trend of women getting kicked out at the 10+ year mark? I think this is because jobs want 10 years of work history. Am I crazy?
Nope. Don't think you are
No, but it has to do w/her entitlement to his SS/retirement if married >10 yrs
That's true , after 10 yrs , they throw you out , expecting you not to find a job . 🙄 He wants to see you beg him & give him the power of saying no .
@@fantym1633he is the one who is entitled, she's doing 5 jobs and more at the same time at home tf you're talking about, they want women to share but not them, she's sharing everything, when she's cooking she's cooking for both, when she's cleaning she's cleaning for both etc
@@fantym1633but the man doesn’t lose any SS money even if she does collect it. She can just get paid his amount if it is more than hers. He still gets his amount too.
I wonder what his reaction would be when he finds out that Mexican wives expect the check/direct deposit straight from his work into her account and then to receive allowance from her.
🤣😂 this was my mom and dad. My dad never seen or knew how much his check was because my mom paid all the bills. She'd get her check and his, pay all the bills, get groceries, put some in savings then he'd get whatever is left. This is normal for me seeing this is crazy.
❤❤❤
$20 000 is not enough in 2024 when you’re a sahm or sahg or whatever & with kids too!
So I’d have been taking more bit by bit & make sure he never finds out. And I’d have also been slowly getting skilled in something. Take evening classes…
Becoz these men can switch up on you instantaneously!
There's also major disabling accidents, sudden stroke/heart attack ...
This is something you discuss before getting married.
Nope, it's logical, if they want women to work aka be traditional they have to share too
The thing about men with tradwives is that they really, truly, honestly "did it all" themselves. Fact is, their kids would have been snatched into foster care, their houses would have been robbed blind, and they wouldn't have clean clothes, food, or anything else to make them available to put in those long hours. Having access to two adults' worth of labor is what allows this fellow to bring in those sweet paychecks.
Say it with me: community property 😂 She’ll still look poor on paper when they get divorced and if she’s been a trad wife she’ll have a decent argument for temp alimony plus child support for each child. Ladies, have your own back because those rainy days are cold and cruel and a final divorce settlement will take years not weeks so be prepared.
My parents got divorced (his cheating(, leaving mother w/5 kids. Awarded CS + alimony by courts - never a dime seen of it, not even from his estate, coz 2d family
I stayed w my mom while going through a rough patch, paying my way by doing legal work (was working my paralegal cert). She said she couldn't see what I was doing. I put everything in a spreadsheet and found out I was doing enough to pay her mortgage (which I got her out of) three times over. Moved to an apt 5blocks from the beach a few months later...
Great job . I know your Mom is happy & proud of you 👏. 😊
I will never forget the 60+ yr old woman I met whose husband left her for a younger woman. He and his mistress left town with all their money. Young ladies, you do NOT want to be in your retirement yrs having to start all over. ALWAYS HAVE A BACK-UP PLAN. DO NOT TELL A MAN YOU WILL PROVE YOUR LOVE FOR HIM BY LETTING HIM HAVE ALL BANK ACCOUNTS AND PROPERTY IN HIS NAME ONLY. It's not wrong to care about your security especially if you chose to be a SAHM. A good man will make sure you feel secure.
Yep and that I why I started a Roth at 23
I’m going thru the exact same thing right now. Except for me it was over like 300$. And now I’m about to be homeless in less than 2 weeks. I just wish I had taken more. Proved me right.
This is why you stay single and have your money 💰 I could never
You mean pop out three kids and not take care of them.
@@JasonFlake-op1ll I wish you get the help you desperately need XY - must suck at life when you have to troll 🧌
I hope this is a skit. He sounds violent, a woman is not safe with him.
When his says “my money” tells you he wants her financially dependent on him so he can hurt her and the kids. This is exactly why she needs to set money aside because he’s already making a difference between what’s mine and we as a family, which proves she needs to think about herself and the kids.
This is hard for me. In theory, she's not wrong. There shoulda been something to the side for her regardless. But to take 20k off rip and not have no discussion about it is wild to me. Maybe it's cuz I don't move that kind of money around idk. And if I'm being really frfr if he really cared about her he woulda already had something set up for her if they really didn't want her working, savings, investment fund something....
Also notice like... He was so quick to act like she don't do nothing for him, like he didn't marry her. These men make you dependant on them so they can turn around and make you feel worthless in an instant. For him to make her dependent on him then act like it's not THEIR money TOGETHER?! Chileeeeeeeeeeeee
Its not taken frrom his account. She is setting aside small amounts over a long time. She did not steal out of bank account. And absolutely, he should have been setting aside a stipend for her personnal use or disposal every month. Like a emergency fund.
She wrong. She took money from his account for personal use. If he gave her money sure its cool, if she had her own job, thats cool too. But when you take family money for personal use, you endanger the entire family.
U obviously didn’t watch the video. She LITERALLY said it’s money put aside over the years. She never took 20k out at once.
@@zero1188Again, u ppl are slow or something. She put aside money given to her from THEIR JOINT account.
Lol , pickmes don't read or listen to facts . They see a BM & all bets are off . They refuse to try to see through the layers of obvious dust . 😅😂
I think prenups should always be signed before you get married... Same with DNA tests when a baby is born before signing the birth certificate.
Something that stuck out to me about their argument was when she mentioned all that she does for him and their family. He doesn't feel like she's doing anything. To him what she's doing is not worthy of payment or accolade. The work of a woman is not appreciated, whether it's domestic or an outside job. I had a partner who made my jobs seem lesser than his and made sure I knew it. You could have a "real" job and this type of man would still shit on you. Ladies, go where you are appreciated. Don't fall for the rope-a-dope.
Don't marry broke men. He's a Dusty. A provider know the importance of providing security for his Wife thus her putting away money makes sense. This is a skit most likely but an important one.
FACTS
He clearly isn't broke if she is able to take 20K. Probably less than 25% of his money which is generous. What she did is fine as long as she doesn't spend it on another man and spends it on herself so she can secure herself and herself only(and children).
@@rabeechowdhurywe don’t know how long it took to save all that.
@@rabeechowdhury he's broke if he's angry about money. Men that are well off financially and fully provide for his family isn't hollering at his Wife over money. So many wives husbands unexpectedly die and if she hasn't put money up she could face eviction and be homeless without her husbands income to support her and her children. He should be happy she had enough sense to put money away instead of spending it foolishly.
It definitely isn't a skit. You can't fake those levels of emotions.
Shes absolutely right
"It's ours when we make it together" is he simple? Yall made a whole ass life together
Bonnet women saying “you gotta bet these women better dog” like she’s some kind of man.
You’re not on their team, ma’am!
No matter what happens, I’ll always be Team Woman. All the foul, wretched, dogged schemes and ploys that men have created since day 1 will never make them leave Team Woman. Even the transwomen are still Team Man! If men can still be all for their boys after the damage they’ve done, you can still be for your fellow woman just because you don’t like something she did.
Because what is the alternative? Join Team Man? That’s called being a Pick Me!!
This is why prenups are good. Prenups are good for ladies too, ladies. They keep you safe. Although, I don't agree with her not communicating properly about her fears. He doesn't understand that she is working too without being paid. Let's add up all her jobs having his baby(1 baby surrogate is 50k), babysitting (1 kid for 14 years way over 100k) housekeeping (let's say 300 days for 18 years 540k) and personal assistant(1 year 50k). He is literally saving money. And, they know this. That's why they get married so soon after they divorce. They like free labor.
This this this!!! This is why every prenup for a family where one parent is going to stay at home should price out the cost of outsourcing all the labor they will be doing. And your number is low balling it - you can't get a surrogate for $50K, and remember a stay at home parent is also a nurse and cook, AND on call 24 hours. The sad thing is that now that women are killing it in college degrees and careers over men, some of them are starting to do their stay at home husband just as dirty, so ANY marriage where the possibility of a SAHP should include this financial evaluation in the prenup. And it should include the loss of income AND increases due to promotions the SAHP will be giving up.
Of course, unless you are a millionaire there's no way to really compensate your partner should you decide to split, but people are being tossed back in the job market right now with decades long gaps in their work history, 50/50 custody and left with child support they have to go to court to collect. Just being able to see how the partner who's going to be the "earner" reacts to putting a dollar amount on the SAHP's contributions will tell you a lot you'd learn the hard way otherwise - and in time to act on it too.
@@DaryleBrown Exactly. One thing that got me is that while men have a retirement age, women Never stop working for the family. They never retire. They are the cooks, cleaners, planners and babysitters. It's rare that men do half of the chores or take care of grandkids. When I heard that and thought about it, it blew my mind because man... Its so true.
Ouuu that pick me just irritated the heck out of me. On top of taking care of the house and the children and most likely tending to her husband, she should get a job to save her own money?! 😒😒
That's why you get an electronic statement
😂😂😂😂 PROUD OF HER !! SPREAD THIS LIKE WILDFIRE.
i've said it before and i'll say it again, men never view money as our money just their money unless it's your money then it's "our" money
Baby, if you could do it by yourself❤️❤️❤️👍 Keep doing it by yourself👍👍👍
Idcwys if he or anyone is giving ME money it's mines.
Unfortunately , many women just want a ring . They are scared to suggest a prenup to protect THEIR assets. In their hearts , they know that many men are only there for " a come up ." 😔 The old " Why are you marrying me , if you don't trust me. Let's just call everything off ." 😌 Ladies, run if he responds that way , he essentially said " Yep , i want half of YOUR hard earned ish when i leave . " 😢
She is smart for collecting the money, the husband should know that because of her staying at home he is able to work 😅
Women have been keeping rainy day funds since forever. Do you know how many times I’ve gone into my rainy day funds for my household? My husband loves that I do that. Women are savers and this is actually proof these men don’t know what a traditional relationship is.
She was justified to take the money to cover herself because as we can all see, that man clearly wouldn't have given her a dime if he could. All I have to say ladies is this is why a pre-nup is so important. If a man wants to marry me and make me a stay at home wife, then I'm getting an ironclad pre-nup so he knows from the get go that I intend to make "his" money, "our" money. I just got a significant raise and a 14% 5-figure bonus. Any man who wants me to quit that so we can squabble over money is delusional. I can be a stay at home mom if he got his paycheck automatically sending money to my own HSA, 401k, Roth IRA, and emergency savings account. 😂😂😂
I will not be caught with my pants on the ground. Nope. I've seen it happen way too many times as a cautionary tale.
Perfect. Some prenups are worthless. Most men stop working or take small part-time jobs jobs , to make sure YOU don't get a dime . Child support is a joke , they can't make the men pay & men don't mind going to jail . Like you said , it's best to have your own side job & hide YOUR money . 😊🎉
I send all my love and support to all the women out there “living” like that, you deserve better sisters,you deserve so much better. The blond woman,the Mormon, story breaks my heart,may God takes the wheel. She literally build this man’s fortune! Ladies pleas don’t ever EVER give up your power to ANYONE,husband,parents! Things can turn bad really quick!!! Let’s alone him quitting you,what about life happening to your family ,something happens to him,lost his job,died whatever,what you gonna do??! You cannot do that let’s be for real now it’s 2024 cmon we have to do better!
I can understand where the wife was coming from because there was a time in history were women were not allowed to work but at the same time when you get married you guys share money.😊
Not so much not allowed - women have always worked. It's that jobs available were severely limited to women. Coveture laws meant no property/$$ in her name, also.
I was 20 & in the army before I could open an account w/o a male co-signer (who would have access to my funds). Even then, I had to get a letter from my WAC commander in order for 75% not be deducted& sent "home" to parent.
When he started talking I knew exactly why she put the money in that account!
This is why you have a side hustle and avoid issues like this.
The way he stormed in the house yelling and recording her… no wonder she has a secret account, this guy cant be trusted.
I seen this happen to my Mom,so she schooled me on wat to do. That's y wen I did get divorced, I was prepared!!!!
This looks real to me, if they’re acting they’re good actors, ladies, get your bag, however you can🙏🏾
Was thinking the same
She knows anything over 10,000 IRS is going to take she has to file for taxes cause the bank will do it for you 👀
The taxes already came out of his check...she doesn't have to pay taxes again
Taxes already been filed
This is post-tax money if it was coming from his paycheck like they said.
Hey everyone chill I’m just saying that in some banks also depends on the state the you are in that if you don’t claim where the money came from and it’s not in a saving account the bank will file taxes for you ( better yet sale your ass to the IRS to save themselves) food for thought 💭 yes she should put some away but also keep that in mind cause one my banks said that for my savings and I had less then 10,000 to 1,000 in and I had to call the bank about it cause was confused myself so I raised that question
On savings , you only pay taxes on the INTEREST earned on said money . For IRA'S , you only pay taxes on interest earned or if you take money out before you retire . I am a widow, after 28 yrs & I have been saving since I was single , separately 😅. After watching my Aunts , waiting until Friday when their husbands got paid , I decided that's not the life I want . Heck , what if something happens on a Tuesday, etc ? 🤔 # never put all eggs in one basket 🧺 # teach your girls 👧 😅
Next time I get married, I'm signing a pre-nup. That way, ALL money & assets that I have before marriage remain mine after divorce. If I create new businesses/get more assets post marriage, I'd get a post- nup. I don't play about my money.
A coworker of mine from a long time ago told me he got insanely pissed at his girlfriend of nearly ten years because when she left she bought a car.
He didn't think she had any money, so then he was like "she was planning this". He actually tried to blow up her car. It didn't blow up just was on fire and he had to go to jail, where finally he got help and became a normal person. It goes to show though these dudes are always counting on women to be trapped and if they planned a way out, where they didn't have to go to a shelter it drives them insane.
It is fine with them if women leave as long as they have to live on the streets and terrible things will happen to them.
"what do you bring to the table"
when i paid rent, he didnt respect me. I bought 1000s worth of food, to this day he says ive never spent any money on him.
Just dont, if u not treating him like he's the woman, he wont give you credit. Keep your money.
keep some of the money he giving you in savings too. she is right.
All the guys crowing about being providers. Is he providing for her mental, emotional and spiritual stability by losing it about the money in an account?
Red bonnet’s trippin’…
She has a point
@@2okaycola Of course, Darling😊
She messed up putting it into a bank. That would be his money too, y’all are legally married. Take the money but put it aside, not in a traceable bank 😂
It’s a skit! If you’re slick enough to “skim” $22,000 from your husband then I know you’re smart enough to hide it better than that. JS…..
His reactions of "Everything YOU do for us?!...what aggreement?....my money" and everything else are exactly why she's setting money aside from the money he gives her. He doesn't see it as the family's money that he earns and she manages, he sees it as his money that he gifts to the wife and children he supports.
He wants a trad wife but he doesn't want to have trad wife responsibilities if he shuts off her access she needs to get a job and leave
When emotions are high and people are in their feelings while going through a breakup or separation, fairness and logic goes out the door. As does respect and decency. That’s why it’s important to plan and set things in order prior to discord. No one wants it to happen, but time and time again it does. I don’t hide anything from my spouse, he’s aware that I have it, but it is money separate from money from the household just for me. I don’t hold it over his head, but then again that’s an understanding we have in our relationship.
traditional marriage needs to be secured with traditional tools fin favor of the wife: prenup, dower in case divorce or man's death, part of the house in her name, part of their company on her name as to secure her future. Our grandmothers were secured with those, got expensive gifts as diamond ring or something for each child birth and if they lost the husband's support they still got something out of that marriage to carry on.
This is Why women SHOULD be independent!
Joint accounts are fair game. Spousal IRAs are a thing. Prenuptial agreements are your friend. Even if a man is a provider or portrays himself that way or insists that you don't work, always always ALWAYS HAVE YOUR OWN and make sure its being set aside in a place he can't see, get or even know about. And finally: any man who yells at you about "his money" and says you don't contribute anything is NOT the man you want.
What’s weird is that I had church members come to my door about two months ago. I had been considering going back to church so I chatted with them a bit. They gave me a book and wanted to come back and meet with me. It was the Mormons! Now maybe this isn’t unusual idk but these guys were from out of state and only talked to me as far as I know. They left my home and never knocked on any other doors. I am single and own my own home. Maybe it’s nothing, maybe I’m paranoid, but with good reason I think. So much info is available online. So be careful who you talk to just in case they really are scouting out there. I went through too much in life to get to buying my own home that no one could throw me out of or mistreat me in. I’m not giving it up to any man.
These things are a scam and temporary. Get whatever you can out of it. Myself I don’t even blame the men because men have approached me multiple times with these arrangements especially when I was younger skinnier & much more attractive.
I turned them down (I actually regretted at that time coz I was soooo broke!) but in hindsight the struggle had me build emotional strength to work at what I desired. Now I’m super skilled with multiple things going on.
Sometimes we women just want to be on easy street so we can flex on IG. And these same women will look down their nose at single independent women and call you an old hag. They’ll remind you how you are alone with no husband, no kids & what’s wrong with you.., so hey choices have consequences! I say this coming from an African background. It’s ridiculous the amount of venom you get from both men & women when you’re single, independent & child free or childless (I can’t keep up with these terms)… I just try to live my life peacefully
I wish i could explain the anxiety associated with being a trad wife. It's not fun and games cos your livelihood depends solely on his moods. It's a terrible way to live. I am speaking from a place of experience.
She did the right thing based on his reaction. He wants to extract invisible labor from her: cooking, cleaning, personal shopper, sex, giving him kids, raising the kids, without thinking, what would it cost if he had to pay for these services from strangers 🤔
The answer: a lot of cash.
Then after he extracted her of her invisible labor, he claims she doesn’t do anything.
Ladies when a man dont value the work you contribute to the relationship, its time to leave. If you want leave, please elevate yourself by doing work thats more rewarding whether its finding a small business or furthering your career. You actually should find another boss cuz your boss hubby aint appreciating the work you do.
I don't blame her every woman should do this with any man they are in a relationship with. Save your money and his!!
Thats not cool. She should have sat down and talked to him. She wouldn't like it if the shoe were on the other foot. She did not go about this the right way🤔🫤😔.
Bro is only able to go out and follow his purpose and make money, because she stays at home and takes care of everything else. Men who are blessed to have a stay at home wife should be very, very careful. The moment she is gone, he has no clean clothes to put on his back, no socks, no food, no child care, no doctors appointment, and soon, no health, no hygiene, and no purpose. She is providing for him. She gave him children, a home and purpose. The least he can do is pay the bills and be appreciative.
One thing I don't get is why not tell him? I wouldn't like the sneakiness, because it feels wrong.
Ladies, if you are considering getting married to become a stay at home wife/mum, sign a contract to assure your financial stability. Men are spoiled and entitled creatures and they don't hold themselves accountable for cheating, mistreating or abandoning their wives and children.
I think if you're dependent on your husband and dont earn any income other than his, u should set something to the side. If she spent that money on clothes, bags and shoes, he wouldn't have a problem. Her setting some to the side is protection. Its practical and i see nothing wrong with it.
There should be 3 accounts: his, hers and theirs. The budget should include individual expenses. 😊 So every income needs to be divided in 4 parts: 2 for their account, 1 for hers and 1 for his.
If possible, never put yourself in a position that requires you to be reliant on another person for food and shelter… EVER! This is advice to both men and women.
She is the home manager that money is her salary, she can manage to keep her family going under the budget her husband provides and keeps the difference for herself.
I am just happy that he doesn't suffer from delayed pisstivity😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Woman LISTEN if you get into a relationship or you’re married and you know that man have his name on everything HE OWNS that’s your fault. HAVE YOUR OWN SHIT ladies that way you won’t be on the internet talking about you had nothing when he left you cause he had everything in his name THATS YOUR FAULT. YOU GONNA LEARN.
ANY MAN who wants a traditional stay at home wife, should be made to sign a PRENUPTUAL AGREEMENT.