DECEMBER CHECK-IN | Hannah Louise Poston | MY NO-BUY YEAR
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- Опубліковано 18 вер 2024
- Thank you all so much for your support this year! My no-buy year is over and the rest of my life is beginning :)
***********FOLLOW ME ON INSTAGRAM!!!***********
/ hannahlouiseposton
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MY WEBSITE: www.hannahlouis...
MY HANDMADE TANGO CLOTHING: poemaclothing....
FACEBOOK: / hannah.l.poston
POEMA ON INSTAGRAM: / poemaclothing
POEMA ON FACEBOOK: / poemabyhannahlouise
ON ME
dress: The Reformation
earrings: Jcrew
eyes: Marc Jacobs Style Eye-Con 20 palette (was limited edition)
lips: Lipstick Queen Vesuvius Liquid Lipstick in Coral
INQUIRIES: please write mynobuyyear@gmail.com
THANK YOU FOR WATCHING AND BEING WONDERFUL!
I'm 63. I don't wear much makeup. I'm financially secure. Why have I binge watched you while knitting since I recently found you? Because I love the way your mind works and your voice in this world is beautiful.
:)
yes, so true, I agree
Wow, that is beautiful!!
Very true, she is charming...
Your "too muchness" is exactly why I've found you so watchable and likeable this year Hannah
thank you, Meghan!
You are not annoying at all. I love the way you speak. I am a person who stutters and in one of my speech therapy sessions I had to choose a few people who I admire as a speaker and I chose you as one of those people. I showed my speech therapist one of your videos as a speech role model for myself. You are a wonderful soul.
I'm so flattered! Thanks!
Hannah, hi. I have followed you from the beginning of your wonderful channel and usually I do not comment on you tube videos, but this film really touched a nerve with me. In many ways, we are quite different. I am a 46 year old woman from England. I live with my partner and 3 children and we muddle along quite happily. I do not dance so well and I cannot sew to save my life! However, I share your passion for make-up and am prone to overspending on said passion. I am also a writer and constantly travelling the path of learning about myself as i navigate my way through life. What you say towards the end of this video resonates very strongly with me. As an articulate, opinionated and passionate woman, I have been told my whole life, often by men, that I'm 'too much'. That I have too much to say and, at worst, that I'm just too smart for my own good. That last one particularly makes me shudder. Watching such a charming, eloquent, forthright and intelligent young woman put this into words is very moving. Especially when I see you become emotional and let some of your insecurities show through. I suspect you are absolutely correct in your thoughts, Hannah and I am sure many men, and indeed some women, find you imposing. Whilst I am sure your stature is part of this, it is not the full story. Trust me, many people over the years have told me that I am the same and I am only just over 5 feet tall. As I teach my 2 daughters about the world and watch them blossom so beautifully, I am endlessly inspired by you and your musings and delighted beyond words to see such a fine woman using her voice on this platform. Women like you give me hope.
You are quite spectacular and I hope you know this. The haters are merely intimidated by your brilliance. I wish you every success in the future, it has been a joy to watch your channel grow and I look forward, with immense enthusiasm to see how you it develops in the coming years, regards from wintery Sussex.
Deborah Bulless
Well said. 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
💗👍
Beautifully said!! 💕💕
I'm so joyed to have found a woman of substance make her own space here on youtube. This is the content I crave.
thank you Deborah! love from LA!
There are few enough thoughtful, articulate, grown-up women on youtube - please don’t ever be ashamed to be one of them. It is a joy watching you and I look forward to your content next year x
Girl! Do you realize what you've started in this community? i think you've started something BIG. All I see these days are youtube recomendations of "my low buy year - my no buy year etc" ITS HUGE!! We live in a overspending society and all that media does is manipulate us to feel the need to buy stuff instead of (as I said in another coment) cultivate us as human beings, making us feel we are worth the way we already are wothout the need to buy stuff. As a result of all of this youtube suggestions, I cannot longer watch "PR Hauls" ANYMORE! I cannot stand how much trash, and products companies try to sell all the time.
I do not buy lots of makeup because, as you said, I work, me and my partner have the money to eat and treat us sometimes but argentinian finances is super hard at this particular moment, so we do not overspend and we do have so little to save at the end of each month. Every three months or so I treat myself with a new mascara or a new pair of sneakers just to feel that I work not only to pay gas, electricity etc etc but I do it in that way because of your videos, believe it or not. You helped me a lot!! I feel as well I have a lot to lear.
Thanks so so much Hannah for all the effort you've put this year en all of your videos and feel proud because I believe you've helped a lot of people only sharing your experience. And that's something amazing!
Fer SanchezArt thank you for sharing! I had decided on a no buy year for 2019 and then happened upon Hannah’s channel. I’m happy to hear about your success!
Fer SanchezArt
Yes! Hannah has been such a huge positive influence to so many people!
I only found her 2 months ago and already I am following 3 other people who are doing no-buys (with credit to Hannah) and I’m doing a no-buy 2019 as well.
I just have so much respect and admiration for Hannah.
@@jennym007 Me too!! I found her late October but she came in a perfect timing.. I was strarting to feel anxious about stuff I wanted and have no money to buy but then I heard something she said about "the need to want things" and that was amazing. It just changed my mind completely
Hi girls! I am with you! Hannah Has been my inspiration this year. I am with you, I am doing a low buy year for 2019, too!!!
Same, @JennyM! She has started an awakening! Makeup companies should be quaking. The constant new releases are going to flop. UA-camrs doing hauls are going to get less views, which means less free peddling for those makeup companies. I hope this sparks a change in out materialistic culture, at least with respect to the relationship between youtube and makeup advertising.
Omg that last part is you describing me. Im not a likeable person in real life, or atleast thats what Ive been told. So to have anyone like me here online has been very shocking to me. But at the same time eye-opeining. Because maybe Im not for everyone, but atleast Im for someone :) And girl, we need to meet one day, but now Im scared when you say you are that tall haha :P I'll feel like a gnome :P
You are never too loud or too much, and it sort of makes my heart break when I see such strong, beautiful women feel this way, but I guess we all have insecurities and that's ok.
Both of you have inspired me, in different ways, to be out of my comfort zone, to voice my own opinions without worrying about others or about what they might expect me to be :)
Lots of love from Portugal xx
Angelica Nyqvist - you are a treasure ! I love your channel I watch every video and I’m 5 feet tall so i gnome what you mean😆 please keep being your awesome self!
I'm going to confirm for you as well...you are wonderful!! Your channel is in my top 3, your honesty is always appreciated, and your intelligence, originality, and orginization are all to be praised! (My low buy is heavily based on your low buy formula,btw lol) If people in your "real" life can't appreciate you, leave them in the rear view. No one has ever done anything amazing in life by being part of the pack!
Angelica Nyqvist thank you for letting us know about Hannah’s channel. I love your channel! I’m so thrilled that you follow Hannah. You both breathe fresh, sweet and sassy air into this too-often cloyingly commercial platform.
You are not too much. You are just enough. To lift a line from Brene Brown: stand your sacred ground.
I am also tall, I am loud, talkative and plus size. No one knows what to do wirh me either! My petite friends have told me that they enjoy my presence and the fact that I can intimidate people when needed. They think it's a gift against bullies.
The segment of this video about feeling unlikeable and too much in social situations resonated so truly strongly with me. I teared up listening. Your thoughtful, sensitive, and intellectual way of speaking has made you easily my favourite youtuber this year, the only youtuber that I have watched every video upload, and one of only 5 channels that I watch ads all the way through for (coz I want you to get that cash). I hope that you will continue to share thoughtful and meaningful content on this channel. Your thoughts have resonated with my life, and the lives of so many other viewers who have had the pleasure of listening to your videos.
Jade Fenner beautifully said ❤️
thank you so much, Jade! I really, really appreciate your support. Sending a big hug
Completely agree! Do viewers have to watch the entire ad for the creator to receive money? Or is it the fact that the ad is in the video means she gets financed? I never really knew how it works.
Hannah, I was listening to your video with my eyes closed, and just before you said you were about to cry, I started to cry and I’m still crying as I write this. You said something here that I have never heard another woman speak out loud with such clarity, humility and grace.
I, too am a tall, passionate, opinionated, verbose artist and dancer. I, too have always felt like I am “too much”. It is no secret to me How the seed of this was planted, parents can be so unknowingly cruel! That fear of being “too much” haunts me every time I step on the dance floor; every time I speak up at work; every time I take a risk of any kind. I’m many decades older than you. I’ve pushed through the pain and insecurity to make a good life. But, sometimes I wonder, if that message had been one of support rather than shaming, who knows what I could have been.
I simply can’t thank you enough for your brave work. What a powerful light you are. I know I’m not alone in feeling that I didn’t know i needed you, and then you showed up.....❤️
Gail Jacobson so true, Gail. I hope you find courage to be you...just the way you are.
Stacey O thank you! She really touched me. I haven’t felt this for a long time. It is good to be reminded of it and also to affirm the positive!
thank you Gail! Hugs to you!
Congratulations on completing your no-buy year successfully. You have inspired me to do my own no-buy and by extension you will be changing generations of women in my world because a) I’ve already shared your tips with many women in my circle and they are exploring ways to change their relationship with money/finances. And as the African proverb goes-teach a man teach an individual; teach a woman teach a nation. And in my case you are teaching me how to have a better handle my money. As I prayed to God-“reveal to me how to be a better steward of blessings He has given me” instead of asking Him to bless me with more money. And in turn I will be better able to teach my daughter how to be a better steward with her finances and hopefully she will pass down to her children etc. Long and short of Hannah, no you are not too much and yes it is a common feeling those of us who have strong personality types experience. I subscribed to you for exactly those same reasons you mentioned where you felt insecure-I love your voice, speech and diction. You are able to express yourself clearly and intelligently (I’m nearing 40) and that appeals to me. As I said before I’m one of your early subbies and I look forward to watching your videos. Thanks for everything and I pray that whatever is next for you in 2019 that it is just as impactful as your 2018 no buy project-personally for you.
I LOVE that African proverb!! Thank you!
Hannah, as another woman (and writer) with work to do in the world who's lived her life around the fear and stigma of too-muchness, this video gave me a feeling or three. So I'm sharing a personal thing in hopes that it helps you think about the experience that you've had here and that you've shared with the world on this platform. My own confused, confusing wrangle with too-muchness landed me in residential treatment for an eating disorder when I was twenty. There, the rules of the treatment facility changed my behavior-the idea was that when you suspend the maladaptive coping mechanism, the things with which it attempts to cope become clearer, and you have a chance to try to deal with them on their own terms, which are, in fact, the real terms-the terms of emotion and interior life and self-care and self-management. You've done that for yourself in this no-buy year (and you've done it with a lot of grace and wisdom). When you talk about feeling ready to begin something, I think about myself at the end of treatment (although I did not feel ready to begin something at the time, I was still beginning it). And for whatever it's worth, I think that sense of not being done is crucial to taking the lessons of the thing forward and making them stick and making them meaningful. I can't wait to see you keep beginning.
Thank you for changing this space for the better this year, and for speaking to me as I navigate towards being the woman I want to be in a way I did not think it was possible for a UA-cam beauty channel to do. Thank you for saying in almost so many words that "self-care" as it's often rendered here mistakes the nature of what it means to be, and care for, a self. I hope UA-cam brings you great things in 2019 and you continue bringing your self to it. I'm rooting for you in all the ways one can root for an internet stranger.
thank you! I'm glad to know that what I'm experiencing fits with what experts teach people to expect from good recovery programs. That's so encouraging
The last part of the video in which you described how you felt unlikeable or unwatchable made me tear up. I'm not tall nor educated and eloquent like you, both of which I would love to be! But I'm a "rare breed"; an Asian-American immigrant, queer woman in a very white, heteronormative environment in the Midwest. I'm also highly opinionated, I'm very talkative, and I have a deep, mumbly, raspy voice (of which I can't stand). I've been described as far "too much". Sometimes I'm over-dramatic, I don't have a filter so I say the first thing that pops into my mind, and I'm not afraid to stand out or not fit in. But it's not sadness that I feel, but a rather lonesomeness I feel when I don't necessarily fit in with my friends, coworkers, or classmates.
I binged your videos when I found your channel back in the last quarter of the year and I admired the creative, smart, elegant, beautiful, and self-aware woman you are and aspired to be as strong and as intelligent as you are. Thank you so much for opening up to us in this video, and thank you so much for the emotional help that I got from your videos. They are not only entertaining and insightful, but they are so very therapeutic to me.
you sound totally awesome in every way! I identify with that lonesome feeling, though. It's been helping to read through these comments...I'm not alone and neither are you
Erica, you sound very eloquent and intelligent to me! :) Don’t put yourself down. Know your worth. Also, it’s never too late to go back to school if you so choose. I am an immigrant myself. I decided to go back to finish my undergrad at 29 years old. I am now 30. I then plan on applying for grad school. I am a wife and mother of two little ones. I never dreamed I’d have the courage or opportunity to go back to school but I am realizing my dream. Never sell yourself short. You never know what opportunities may come your way. Also, you don’t need a degree to be intelligent. :) Happy new year and God bless!
I have found you to have a soothing demeanor and easy to watch. Love your honesty and transparency. Keep up the awesome work!
thank you, Kim! xo!
When I was a teenager, some adults, but boys in particular would tell me that if I didn’t stop being so sarcastic, I would never get a boyfriend. And I honestly don’t remember how I reacted at the time. I’m sure there was some amount of self doubt, but also, I remember thinking, how am I going to not be...me? So I kept on going, following my own goofy little star. And it was sometimes (often?) painful. But I couldn’t ultimately not be what I was. And the sarcasm not only amused me, but also helped me find a tribe of like minded people who liked me and didn’t think I was too anything.
And I think that a lot of women, maybe particularly over the last few years, have really been thinking about what it all means to be who we are, just unabashedly ourselves, and let the world apologize to *us* for not making enough room for us to be who we are, without judging us or trying to squash us into littler boxes. And I so desperately want this for my own daughter, who is suffering through the teenage years, and also the times we are in, and all of the terrible identity issues that go with that. I told her yesterday that I hope that all these kids who are grappling with the language of gender in our society, and their place in a scary world, that they come back and roar at the establishment that they’re not going to be forced into any kind of silos, that they’re going to demand a world that doesn’t commodify their identities or guilt trip them for not being something else aside from their beautiful selves and that they don’t have to point it inward or outward, they can just...be okay.
Anyway. Be your super tall, hyper intellectual, way too wordy self. It’s marvelous. And I’m sure that the comments here and elsewhere let you know you are loved for putting all of that out there. Screw the haters. Sending you hugs and wishes for a a happy and stronger new year for all of us.
Paige Shaw you are one hell of a champion mom 🌈🌈
What a sweet thing to say! Thank you.
thank you Paige! I'm glad you followed your own goofy little star :)
Full self, what a great truth. For me, it's being analytical that gets me in trouble out in the world; people see analysis as negative, especially from a woman. But some of us really love hearing a clear analysis, and you've been doing that. Block the trolling commenters and ignore their attempts to wound. They are sad little termites. It's been amazing to watch this project and I'm excited to see the next phase of growth.
sad little termites! Aw. Thank you so much my dear
I relate to the last part very much. For me it's the other way around. I always feel like I take up "too little" space. But i like people like you and your personality. It's hard sometimes being a human
I think it's always something! It feels like there's never a "right level" of muchness for a woman in this world! I bet you are perfect :)
@@HannahLouisePoston just do you Hannah. The society's thinking is the problem, you are just fine and we love you.
Your feelings of “too much”-ness are met and outweighed by your followers “can’t get enough”-ness. Thanks for the inspiration in 2018! So glad I found this channel and am truly excited to embark on my own no buy in 2019. Hugs!
thank you so much, Katelyn! You are so sweet.
I didn't want to add to your inbox, so I wrote you a 7th-grade-level haiku here to express my pride in your success.
Fearing self-hunger,
Sowed and tended compact earth.
A village now feasts.
😘❤️
Ahhh! Courtney! Best haiku ever :) You are awesome, thank you so much.
Wow! Mind, blown! ~Anastacia in Cleveland
It might also just be my personality type, but as a smart, articulate woman who isn't afraid of expressing her opinions, is also loud and confident and takes up a lot of space, I can say confidently that you are not alone.
Hannah, thank you so much for what you shared about feeling like “too much” in the real world. The qualities that you describe that you feel might contribute to that reception from some men are the exact qualities that make me love watching you so much. You’re out here being the woman I want to be - I want to be less timid, more expressive, stop filling up my sentences with “like” and “um” out of nervousness, carry myself with grace and hold my head high. You are such an elegant human being and I admire you so much. Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing your gifts with all of us ♥️
thank you dear one
Oh, Hannah.
thank you for all of your support this year!
I can't believe people actually go out of their way to write mean comments. You are AMAZING.
Hannah, so many people have worded this more eloquently than I ever could. However, I want you to know that you have changed the course of my life through this channel and never ever did I think watching a UA-camr could do that. Your thoughtfulness and ability to express the sentiments many of us share is a true gift. My mishandling of my money is about so much more than an addiction to shopping, shoes, makeup etc., It's a self-destructive pattern that has prevented me from fulfilling my desire to travel and live a meaningful life and until you I couldn't fully verbalize or accept that. You are not too much, you are simply enough and I am so grateful to have found your channel.💕
Elizabeth 2018 beautiful
sending love
HANNAHHHHH
I love your voice ok, if you were a podcast I would listen to you 24/7
You are so beautiful
so intelligent and such a pleasure to watch on UA-cam
Breath of fresh air from all these other girl..cough cough gurus LOL
love ya
from Toronto, Canada
Hannah, you are a breath of fresh air. You are what we have needed to see in the beauty community; that one can be beautiful while also being smart and authentic. That beauty videos can have depth and heart. Thank you for your work and congratulations!!! We love you. ❤
Oh my gosh, Hannah! You have so much to offer! And, yes, I believe that so much of how you have been perceived is rooted in being a smart, opinionated woman. I have a PhD in English, and grad school was particularly painful. I felt like I rubbed everyone the wrong way. It can be so hard, especially when you are sensitive! I feel personally grateful that you took the risk of being vulnerable with all of us. You’re amazing 💗💗💗 Thank you.
thank you, Rachel! I also felt like I rubbed everyone the wrong way in grad school. Sending a big hug!
I completely feel your discomfort. I’ve always been a bigger girl and my whole life I’ve been told I’m “too loud, too annoying, too talkative;” too big to just be me. I’ve always felt like people see me as “too much” and not particularly likable because of it. I learned at a young age that I couldn’t judge my worth on how likable people find me. The people in my life who have value to me like me because of that sense of “too much.” Those are the people I want to surround myself with and I think it’s lovely that UA-cam has helped you to expand that circle of people who like your “toos.” One of my major life goals is to always own my toos and not let people make me feel like “too much” makes me less of a person.
Awe, Hannah. You are so brave. I would venture to say that a lot of women feel like you, including me. We’re told to smile and be gentle...while people walk all over us. And when we have the audacity to want more and be willing to work hard for it, we’re told we’re being bossy, brash, aggressive, pushy, over the top and *gasp* “unlikeable.” And you know what else we are? Inspiring, loving, funny, thoughtful, bold, world-changing, and kick-a**. I’m gifting you a quote for New Year’s - “I love the person I’ve become, because I fought to become her.” By Kaci Diane. Keep changing the world, Hannah.
Hannah, I have been watching youtube channels regularly for the last three to four years and though I have only come across your work in the last couple of weeks I can securely say your channel is one of my favorite youtube channels of all time. I'm so glad you decided to share part of your mind and intellect with us. I love so many aspects of your videos, but one of the things I love the most is that you skewer the notion that "beauty" and "shopping" are simply frivolous pursuits dominated by women because we lack the intellectual capacity for much else. Your powerful examination of these habits illustrated how they can have deep roots in our psyches, emotional selves and beyond. Additionally, as a fellow writer and beauty enthusiast is it truly refreshing to see a woman who can expose every aspect of herself and prove the complexity and depth of who we are as women and human beings. Wishing you all the best for 2019, I cannot wait to see what will come next.
thank you, Kalinda!
Congrats on completing your No Buy! I admire your hard work and dedication so much ❤😀
I love your channel. Thank you so much for sharing your in sights. As an successful introvert, who is smart enough to “fake” extroversion in my dealing in the world, I have always used obsessive thoughts and behaviors (ie. shopping, obsession about skin care, make up, decorating my home and clothing) to sooth and calm my anxiety. I am finding that I can still use obsessive thoughts - but in a kinder more gentle way as you are doing. I love the old Hasidic legend of Zusha, a rabi, who lay dying. He called his friends and family together and told them, “When I meet my creator, he will not say, Zusha, why were not as Moses?” He will say, “Zusha, why were you not as Zusha?” That is I believe you are doing and in turn helping us all to do. Thank you !
thank you! and Dawn, I love the proverb! thank you!
I am so glad you started your channel! Your "too much" is a breadth of fresh air that we all needed. You've shown a light into an area that was so dark and merky we didn't even know it was there. I only found you within the last couple months but you've had a huge impact on the way I viewed the beauty industry. As for the mean comments, sometimes people go through life without mirrors. When you hold one up they'll refuse to look with all that they are. Their personal issues, not yours. Which I'm sure you know. Usually when someone displays hatred it's because something has resonated with them. You opened their eyes and they didn't like it. Keep being you, I (and many many others) are here for it!
Paying off and staying out of credit card debt are fantastic accomplishments for the year.
Also I read some of your poetry. I especially love the sibilance and imagery in the parenthetical in "Julia Hungry."
thank you for reading my work!
I love your "too muchness"!! I think it is part of why your channel has grown so quickly - people love that! I am a strong, educated woman and I have found that some people almost despise that. I think it is because they are not happy. Also I was really hoping that you weren't going to get the horrible hate comments. I can't imagine how that feels. All I can think is that those people are so sad and miserable with themselves. Maybe how we shop to feel better, others are addicted to being nasty to pick themselves up. Anyway, just a thought. Thank you for the year!!!
I totally agree, Erin, I think some people just can't stand smart women!
hi Hannah, congratulations on you NBY! I am sad that it's done but I'm also looking forward to 'my name is Hannah, and this is not my no buy year'.
I wanted to comment on the part of your video where you said that you seem to piss certain men off. Lots of us do! I used to have a job as a manager in a customer service role. You would be amazed how many people asked for the manager, 'get him out here i want a word with him'. 'That would be me'. *sit back and watch the fireworks*. I had a team of men, some of whom didn't like being told what to do by a woman, even one who was my equal on the opposite shift, who thought I answered to him because he was a man. At first I thought it was shitty, because it is. But let me offer you another persepective....
Insecure men can't have women being succesful. Insecure women do what they can to get male approval. Men have essentially had an all male shortlist for jobs, education, opportunities, and have been able to patronise women to make themselves feel better, for decades and generations. After WW2 when women had proved themselves in the workplace, fashions became more femenine because insecure men needed women to go back to their former roles. So yes, you piss certain (shitty) men off. Congratulations. You're doing something right.
In life you can pick and choose whose opinion matters to you. If you respect someone and you get a compliment, it's a compliment. If you get a compliment from someone who's values you can't stand, its an insult. You piss off a shitty man my living and breathing and smashing your shit, its a high five from the sisterhood and a decent amount of the brotherhood too!
:)
God what you said about feeling 'too much' really resonated with me. I've always been a big, bright personality and I've always found that seems to rub people the wrong way. For a lot of my life people would mock me for being too loud (laughing too loud, talking too loud) or too fast. The adults in my life, particularly teachers and church leaders, were very critical of these traits so it has made me it very difficult for me to feel likeable as an adult. It wasn't really until I found a group of like-minded academics who are just as bright and loud that I finally felt like I had a place where I could be wholly myself, and even then when I step outside those communities I'm still met with rejections by people who treat me like me being myself is 'too much'. I hear you, and I really appreciated you articulating it so eloquently xx
Oh my goodness, Hannah, I almost started crying when you almost started crying,
because the experience you are describing near the end of the video is one that
so clearly resonates with me. Too opinionated, too "big", too vocal,
too much.
Jennifer Bravo ME TOO
The second year of sobriety, in my opinion, is the absolute hardest. No matter what you have given up, whether it be alcohol, drugs, sugar, or some type of behavior, the first year is about trying to stay sober. The second year becomes about facing all the feelings, thoughts and “inside stuff” that causes us to adopt addictive behaviors in the first place. It is not easy, but it is such important and worth-while work! Thank you for sharing your journey with such grace and transparency. I know that you are helping so many people as you travel this path. Much love and many blessings to you in this New Year! 💕🎉
Hannah: you are not too much, you are perfectly just enough, the right amount. You have touched so many of us this year with your articulate words and viewpoints, your self reflection, your musings about so many things. You have taken up space, space on UA-cam and in the world that was previously filled with robotic consumerism and "stuff". So thank you for taking up that space and doing that work in the world. You are truly a gift. Shine your light bright!
You’ve started something big here! I am always seeing people mentioning you on their channels. I’ve enjoyed following your journey this year and I can’t wait to see what you have planned for 2019! Love you long time xx
i'm here to add a long comment to your comment section about pissing certain men off. i love you so much, and can relate, hannah. i learned very quickly that dressing weird and sticking up for your weirdo friends will get you made fun of at a young age, but when you stop letting certain boys walk all over you in high school, they explode. we teach our sons that the only way to feel whole is to have power over someone, even in a small or subtle way. i'm not tall, but i was in the marching band all through high school even with all those eyes were on me, i still dressed like robert smith, wore chunky heels, and didn't take shit.
looking back, after 4 years of lexapro, seeing a psychiatrist, and most of all, reading marxist literature - i see that i simply did not conform to the rules within the gender binary that everyone clings to for stability. i went to high school when obama was president, and people didn't like to think that capitalism is still bad, and still produces racism and misogyny at the institutional level. i lost some friends for a while, but the boys of course were the most threatened. one of them posted a tweet insinuating he had sex with me, someone tweeted that they were daydreaming about throwing up on me as i unknowingly was walking in front of them in the hallway. they were so angry that someone like me could exist. y'know, a weirdo, someone with musical ability, artistic ability, someone who was obviously LGBT+ (back then i thought i was a cis woman, now i know i'm just a nonbinary person), and other things our society doesn't teach us to understand.
fast forward to now - and i'm planning to do a no-buy year! because why not? i have learned from you that there is so much a RONB can give the soul - and i need to feed mine as much as possible. i don't need new makeup or clothes or jewelry. i need to strengthen my relationship with my bass guitar, make more paintings, keep hoopdancing and singing. joys that come from inside of us will always prevail. keep writing and dancing, and speaking about your meditation, your new project, etc. YOU ARE AWESOME! thank you for everything you do!
YOU are awesome!! Thank you for sharing this part of your story! Sending a huge hug. ♥️
@@HannahLouisePoston i appreciate your reply! keeping up with this many comments must be exhausting. those events hurt so much at the time but getting my BFA was so healing. *sending hugs back to you as you challenge yourself in the coming year* ❤️
Whew, the tears! I'm so glad your channel came up in my timeline. I've been watching back through your old no-buy videos and they have been so moving. I really appreciate how thoughtfully you approached every video, and how openly and fully you shared some really difficult things to realize about yourself. It was like you were holding up a mirror to me. Thank you for the inspiration and for provoking some deep self reflection. I'm planning to do a no-buy year in 2024 and have been outlining some rules for myself so I can approach my spending with intention in the year ahead.
What you said about the emotional cost of doing UA-cam is exactly why I have never done it. I have had many people over the years tell me I should do a channel. But I’m afraid to because of that cost. I don’t love my voice, I got called Big Bird in high school because of it. I haven’t figured out exactly what I would talk about because I don’t want to just do reviews and have stuff-I don’t like having lots of stuff. And I’m not a makeup artist. I can’t decide what my channel would be, the vision for it beyond that I’m self taught and love makeup and everyone who knows me asks me about makeup and skin care.
And I’m opinionated and assertive. I work in a field that is partially male dominated but female dominated. I’m an ICU nurse and most nurses are female and most doctors are male where I work. And I work in a place with a unique ethnic makeup and there are some cultures where some of their male members do not respond well, if at all, to women. But I have been told I’m a badass and say things other much more experienced nurses are afraid to say. I definitely connect with what you say.
And I’m so glad you took the risk because I have enjoyed watching you so much. My life is richer for having you in it...virtually.... I feel you are friend who understands me even though we have never spoken and that sounds so creepy and weird. You are causing me to pause again and consider again if I can do a channel. Maybe I can develop that thick skin as well because if I can mean to someone what you have meant to me, it would be worth it. Thank you!!
Thank you for all of your support, Shelley! xo!
You’re a strong woman with intellect, character, feelings, perspective, a strong sense of who you are and so much more. I feel like I know exactly what you were describing at the end. Ever since I started watching your videos I’ve felt so akin to you. It seems our personalities really question and rival what is “expected” from us as women. Keep doing your work. I want more of you. The world needs more of you.
you've helped so many people realize the same things about themselves -- the over spending, the discomfort of facing it, how much youtube influences our habits. thank you so much for being a positive influence in the community and helping me to personally change my own spending habits. most of all thank you for being "too much". congrats on all your success, you deserve it!
You did it! That's amazing. I own a small project pan Facebook group in Israel. My last two years have been all about changing my shopping habits and successful low buys. I found you channel in around September and posted a few of your videos in the group. Ever since I did, so many girls were inspired by you to start a no buy year this upcoming year, including myself! Thought I should let you know that, because I'm usually more of a silent follower. Thank you so much, happy new year- keep inspiring us!
thank you so much, Adi!
god bless your beautiful soul hannah. we are all so proud of you and full of joy and excitement to have found someone so special as you. this platform and even this words, as shallow as it might seem from time to time, is sectretly craving for those of us who are truthful, willing to take risks and expose us to the real deal, meaningful thoughts and remind us of who we really aspire to be. you brought inner beauty to the outer beauty focused community.
Thank you so much for being honest about the numbers, money, your income and most importantly DEBT! I’ve thought a lot about this since your last few videos. I’m 42 and I am finally at a point where I have no credit card debt and I’m am comfortably living within my means. I did not grow up with a good understanding of credit, debt etc and the long term consequences of overspending. As a result, my 20s were full of living beyond my means. I’m just so thankful that I didn’t have UA-cam and social media to influence me at the time.....I can’t imagine how much more I would have spent!!!
P.S. I’m sorry you feel like you are too much! I feel like your are the perfect person to articulate these issue and I have loved every second of your videos. Congrats on finishing your no buy. I’m looking forward to whatever 2019 brings to your channel.
What is amazing is that all the bad things about you is absolutely not the case. You are courageous, determined, committed, beautiful, open, fun, interesting, fascinating and much more. You’re never too much. Thanks for your channel, your opinions, your documentation and keep it up. Well done you and great work !
So overjoyed to watch this, you're online presence is so important to me/us. Keep it up x
Thank you so much, Erin! xo!
Oh Hannah ! Hannah ! My past weeks / months have been so busy and I have not had time to “ check in with Hannah “ per usual. It’s way early on a rainy Sunday and I quickly started your video as I sip my coffee . I’m half way through and just so delighted listening to you explain your inner journey this year , your life and all your personal issues . I’m laughing because I found you a year ago because of my fierce love for makeup, but I stayed with you because every time I listen I hear your writer - soul , loud and strong and filled with inspiration. You are “ writing “ even when UA-cam- ing ! Your story is so strong that I must say you have the effect of a good book in my life . My situation is dire and so hard at present but just like a good read you carry me away out of it all for a while . What a pleasure for me . Again , I’m nearly 62 but you are so totally relatable. Thank you Hannah for your channel.
I’m adding a bit , because I listened to the end lol . I teared up when you spoke about people being intimidated by you in the RL , Hannah, because I believe it’s because you are so intelligent and educated. And able to speak ! So shine on and blaze your trail in the world .
thank you, Ursula! It's so nice to hear from you, sending a big hug
This video made me cry. You are not “too much” Hannah. You are wonderful. You are magnificent. I hope you will never feel that way anymore. Because I just love the way you are.💕
Hannah, I want to write something eloquent and deep, but I realize that I can simply say thank you. Thank you for talking in this video about your experience of moving through the world as a woman and the insecurities that you confront. Because I’ve watched your videos through this year (I believe the Rouge video was the first to show up in my feed) I’ve been pushed to examine my own behaviors and plans. The beauty of this platform is that no one has been forcing me to watch your content, but I truly enjoy watching you and I know that I *need* to hear what you’ve had to say.
I’m taking the plunge with a no-buy year, kicking and screaming, but I’m going for it! I’m setting my guidelines with some trepidation; I want to make parameters that I can follow. I’m thrilled to have a whole set of UA-camrs to watch who will be doing a no-buy year in 2019.
Hannah, you are not too much. You are enough. I enjoy your channel, and your strong personality, and I find your voice to be very soothing.
Additionally, you have inspired me to do a no buy for 2019 to turn my own life around. Thank you very much.
Yay. I just completed your 2018 videos in chronological order. I really did treat these videos as a book. And now that I’ve watched your last video, which actually was my first video that influenced me to become a subscriber, I feel that I have “panned“ another book.
Your videos were highly influential in my household. Since watching your videos at the end of December, I have shifted my mindset in make-up purchasing. It gave me the mind space to re-think about my purchases against my collection.
Along the way, I have decluttered many of what I owned. I have learned to take control of the situation, of what I choose that comes into my home. Your influence has given me the self-power to create new activities within my household. It has given me the mind capacity to create daily family reading time, daily family journaling time, daily family sit down conversation style get-togethers. This mindset, these family activities, also gives me time back with my family.
What do you offer to viewers out here is a different perspective, a perspective that is very much needed. And when I say needed, I needed it. It has helped me. You’re no buy project in make-up, clothing, housewares and plants, has actually translated into other areas in life. Thank you so much for offering yourself, for putting yourself in a vulnerable position, just to share your thoughts, your words, and your perspective when it comes to consumerism. I enjoy your long videos. You are very articulate, providing the necessary words to describe some sort of chaos that goes in our minds and in our hearts, which then translates into our behaviors. You allow a space for us to hear what we need to hear. #Toughlove.LOL. What you teach and share is very powerful. . I can only think you so much.
Thank you Hanna. I'm 33 years old and i started Oktober 2018 my own business as an Architekt. I did a Oktober to Christmas No-Buy, and Tomorrow starts my No-Buy year 2019. Because of you. Watching your videos really helped me to understand why i can't keep rewarding myself for everything i do, and why i should stop spending in skincare, makeup and fashion like i'm a rich lady. I need the money to be and stay independent now and in the future. Same as you i do like have all my nice things, and i don't want to downsize or became a minimalist, but i really needed you to tell me i should reward myself by using all the nice things i already have and not wanting constantly something new. Congratulations on your accomplishments, and thank you again soso much for giving me the tools i needed to do my own no buy year. You really made the difference.
This has been my favorite video this year! I’m so glad to know that I’m not the only woman who feels a certain social tension with certain men. I work in finance, so I’m constantly surrounded by men who either don’t take me seriously or who are threatened by me. I’m so tired of having to tell myself to “tone it down” or “dial it back” to make these men feel more comfortable. I’m also a tall woman and tend to stick out in a crowd, so I love that I’m not the only person who feels this way from time to time. But most importantly this series of videos has really inspired me to be a more conscious spender. I waste so much money each year buying tons and tons of hair, skin, and makeup products. This has been a great guide to help evaluate, not only how I spend money, but also how I use the products I buy. I’m really looking forward to what’s in store for 2019! Also I’m from North Carolina too! Happy New Year!
I couldn’t agree more with your notes on this type of social discomfort - too much insight, too much talent, too much beauty and possibility for some people to grapple with. But we also come with BIG understanding hearts and an endless supply of love to share! I think your channel is proof of how magical it is when such a force is focused and given an outlet ✨ What you’re doing here is absolutely beautiful and at least for this gal will never be too much - woowoo, drag-cats and all ❤️
:)
I’m sorry you have had to deal with negative responses. They are not deserved at all. You managed to reach something in so many people collectively and that is something that not just anyone can do. You definitely are not “too much” of anything. You are doing your work in the world simply by being you! Happy end of No Buy 2018, you should be very proud of all of your changes! I’m glad I was with you on your journey. Happy New Year!
I'm a new subbie but you inspired me to take my toying around with a no buy for 2019 and make it a full blown thing. I'm very encouraged and excited and empowered and it's because of your videos. It LITERALLY popped one day out of nowhere and I'm so happy it did. I sat down the other day for hours and got all my debt together and finally did my budget and I have never done that.... Always talked about it but never did it. The line in one of your videos that really pushed me was when you said that you hear people say wish me luck on my no buy or pray for me that I'm able to do this and you said that "if you are not able to do it is because you made the choice not to follow your rules" then you said "it's not luck or anything like that it's you sticking to your decision and following the rules you set for yourself" and I was like BOOM!
YAY! This is what I like to hear, I'm so proud of you for sitting down with it all and starting!
I know exactly what you mean. It's probably why I like watching you so much, bc I can relate a lot. Happy New Year Hannah, can't wait to see what's next!
thank you so much, Alice!
You, your channel, and specifically the content of this video resonates so strongly with me. Overspending, not being a wallflower, being of strong mind, unapologetical dressing/presentation of yourself, not being complacent, your artistic nature, but also feeling like you are "too much" for some. I can't relate to why people spend time bringing other people down - what a poor use of time on this earth. It saddens me when I hear others have been doing that to you. I realize that your videos could stop at any point in time, and I happily gobble them up now. I feel so luck to have come across your channel. Happy New Year!
Hannah you are not only an inspiration and joy to watch and listen to you, but most importantly although you are insanely beautiful it’s your inner beauty that truly shines through and I believe that’s what makes you so endearing and wonderful xx
Thank you for sharing your journey with us 💗 I have been binge watching your videos the past 3 weeks. I don't really have a shopping problem but I love your (new) attitude and your insights. I think you are the type of person that inspires and encourages people, you are charismatic, intelligent and artistic. You truly are an artist and it's not easy for artists to navigate this world. There will always be haters - It's mostly jealosy and envy and people who don't want to hear the truth. You have made yourself vulnerable on this channel in many ways (which is rare and beautiful) and people feel intimidated by you so they attack you. People enjoy attacking whats beautiful. Crazy world. Anyway - You ARE likeable. We like you!! Keep doing your work in the world. Looking forward to watching your channel in 2019. Much love to you 💗
Congratulations Hannah on completing the No buy year 🙌 I found your channel this summer when I myself changed my own future and quit my job. I have been gravitating towards the women on YT that I feel connected too, and you describing the part about being unlikable, tears just welled up and hit that part of me that always have made me hide a part of me that is that loud opinionated woman. Thank you so much for making me think about my spending habits. I have always budgeted my skincare and makeup spending so it's never been about the money. But 2019 will be the year of low buy and not falling for the frenzy of all the new stuff launching weekly of products that we probably already have. Have a happy new year 🎇🎉
You almost had me crying a little too at the end of this video Hannah! You are such an amazing and inspirational woman. You are probably the most articulate person I've heard on youtube and that makes you that much more interesting to watch and listen to. Unfortunately I think all women deal with some of the same stuff you described. I'm more soft spoken and only five feet tall so certain men don't take me seriously and then get frustrated or confused when I stand up for myself or voice an opinion. Certain people feel all women should fit into one box regardless of their personalities and I think it's one of the most challenging things to find yourself when you don't fit that box (and I'd say no one really does). I'm so grateful that I found your channel when I did. 2018 was probably the worst year of my life but I'm ending it feeling like I found myself and I know what I want and I'm truly happy. I learned so much about myself and how to live my best life but there was still the shopping problem I have and I was internally struggling with what to do about that and that's when I stumbled across your channel. I'm doing a no buy for 2019 because of you and I'm so excited to see what more I will come to learn about myself. When I posted my intro for my no buy year I was so shocked at all the amazing comments I've received. Most people mentioned how they had been inspired by you as well :) I can't wait to see what 2019 brings for you and I hope you'll continue sharing your journey with us! Sorry for such a long comment hah anyways thank you so much for being you and for sharing this part of your life with us!
thank you Sarah!
Having recently discovered your channel (and having an essay deadline from which I wanted to divert my attention and/or flee), I spent some time this weekend "getting to know 'you'" via your posted videos. I also read your essays and poems. You are a gifted writer and speaker, but the real gift is how you've shared your incredible growth through this particular medium. I teach theatre for a living, and so I hope you will trust me when I tell you that you have "it"--charisma, presence, wit, and so so much talent. May your confidence continue to grow and your wisdom continue to inspire us! Onward to 2019!!
Hannah, I love your personality! I appreciate how specific you are with your words and find it to be no surprise you are a writer. I’m an engineer by trade, and while we are quite different I believe that is what draws me to your content. No one is for everyone, but your channel is special and it’s all because of you and what you bring to this platform. Thank you for being you and for sharing your thoughts and experiences with all of us.
UA-camrs are so relatable you don't see the add when they say "it's worth every penny, you should get it". They can be so relatable it makes me feel it's normal to want and own luxurious makeup and skincare (when it's really not). I recognize it's a genius selling tactic for the big companies, but I refuse to fall for it anymore. I'm excited for my no-buy year (and a little terrified), but I know I can do it :)
OMG I'm in love with your personality! :)
AW thanks Dannie!
I feel that your outgoing and bluntness is what makes you so appealing. You are willing to say what other people are afraid of saying and because you are so small it allows us to feel like you are a friend speaking to us about a problem and encouraging us to repair our bad habits as well
Girlfriend. I started crying when you told about being “too much”. I was literally told that by a man that I dated years ago that “for every day he spent with me he needed a three day break because I was too much”
thank you so much for everything, Cecile! Email coming soon :)
I’m reading through these beautiful and heartbreaking comments, and crying. In a time when we are finally confronting the staggering inequality of our world to see how so many of us feel we are too much or not enough or in some other way need to make ourselves small, less, different. Hannah you are a gift you have given to us all, perfect in your imperfection as are we all. How do we learn and grow if we are the mythical beast that is perfection? May I offer you a heartfelt thank you for more than I can express.
I haven’t watched it yet but I’m so excited for you completing this project. You have opened my eyes to a different mindset with my makeup. I appreciate what you have done for me and I wish you all the best.
Also, your look is beautiful in this video!
thank you!
Hi Hannah. Here in January 2021, just binged your channel over the past week and you have inspired me to do a year no buy this year. I just wanted to tell you thank you for making yourself vulnerable for others to find and relate to.
Yes, thank you for being open and raw with the numbers. My thing is food and things have gotten out of control. I'm watching your recovery and I appreciate it so much.
Truly, all the reasons you were concerned about being on youtube and having people watch you reflects my own experiences time and time again. I've never had anyone else phrase things this way and it makes me want to cry because it helps me not feel as alone in my life experiences. I talk too much, I have strong opinions, I get passionate, I do not adhere every time to conventional fashion choices, my hobbies and interests are niche, and don't always have someone to speak with about those interests; I won't even go into experiences with different males in my lifetime. Your videos and presence in my life this year have been nothing but a pleasure and a help. Congratulations on your no-buy and success as a content creator on youtube Hannah. Much love
I watch every video you make because of your presence, because of the space you deserve and demand, because you are direct and clear and vulnerable and sensitive to others. I also have graduate degrees in English and watching your videos is like having an intellectual conversation about my makeup hobby with a friend. I cannot express what a joy it has been to find your channel, to find a space that isn’t about buying but instead about thinking about and loving makeup and skincare, about exploring a hobby in a deeper way. I fully understand the feeling of being a woman and trying to express yourself and often feeling as though that very act of self-expression is an affront to those who want you to remain in a space that makes them comfortable, that does not require them to reconsider how they move through the world and interact with others. You are an inspiration beyond your no-Buy by creating a space for this type of work on UA-cam. Thank you.
thank you Sarah!
This is amazing. I discovered your channel a couple of days ago, and I can’t stop watching. I feel like I’m watching myself. So many of us have been pulled into the consumer culture, and we need to take a few steps back from it.
My husband and I fought horribly before I started an 18 month no buy (I had and still have a lot of stuff). He was spending on his hobbies, and I was spending on mine... we went on a CASH DIET- groceries only, and it saved us financially...
As for how you feel about yourself, there are quite a few over-educated, articulate women who take up a lot of space out here...
Your "too muchness" is absolute perfection. Thank you for being you, for your perspective, for your eloquence and your wonderful and unique personality, and for sharing all of these things with us on this platform. I can honestly say that your videos are the ones I look forward to the most, that I'm always excited to watch, and that I feel really and truly speak to me and to so many of my own experiences, and even those that don't I still thoroughly enjoy because I enjoy you. You have helped so many people this year, myself included, and I am so grateful for you as I watch this on the first day of my own no-buy year. And do you see this landslide you've helped create? All of these no-buys and low-buys and conscious consumerism and the sort of uprising against these normalized standards that the beauty community perpetuates (I'm currently right there where you were -with a habit of buying makeup and skincare like a rich lady, when in reality, I'm a draper/costume artisan at a regional theatre... not a rich lady lol). When self-care leads to debt and financial strain, it's no longer care, it's harm. And no one talks about that. All of this to say, I think you're wonderful, I'm grateful that you chose to share your journey, and CONGRATULATIONS on completing your no-buy year!!!!!!!!!!!!! I cannot wait to see what 2019 has in store for you
*sniffle* *wipes away tears* Oh Hannah, how deeply you touch me. I totally understand the fear of being 'too much.' Strong, loud, opinionated women are not always easy to handle, or so I'm told. Thank you for letting your light shine, which encourages others like you to shine as well. So proud of you, and looking forward to your content in 2019.💖💖💖
thank you, April! xo!
@@HannahLouisePoston You're welcome, as always. Btw, I spied a Poema dress that it seems you made just for me. I sent you an email on Poema website. Squeeeeeeal!!! Xo
I don't think you're too much, but you are a lot. And it's a whole lot of goodness. It's often the thing making the decision for me when I'm stuck for what I should watch next. When I was going through a lot of emotional turmoil and found it difficult to be alone with my thoughts, your videos were the best solution to my problems, because I could listen to you talking for hours and enjoy every second of it. Can't wait to see what you have for us in 2019 ❤️
Thank you for your channel! Thank you for putting yourself out there and sharing your amazing articulate, "too muchness" with us. It is hard to describe what your channel has meant to me this year and how much I have enjoyed watching you. Thank you for being a breath of fresh air on UA-cam! Thank you for talking about money and shopping addiction and so many other things that have struck a chord with me.
I resonate with your "too muchness" I was raised by a single father for most of my childhood and I think that has shaped my personality and interests. I was a "girly tomboy" I sometimes even now feel awkward embracing my femininity, intellect, in a society that likes to put people into boxes. I am a introvert/extrovert who finds herself always criticizing or worried about being too much. I voice my opinions, I am assertive in my career, but sometimes think I am too much or should be more something, so I am well liked. I love girly things like makeup, clothes, etc..but also want to be taken seriously with respect, but also be sociable. I appreciate you, Hannah, for putting yourself out here, showing us your vulnerability...it truly brought tears to my eyes when you were tearing up and saying you feel like you are "too much" it has shown me that I am not alone in feeling this way. And I don't feel like you are "too much". I actually really enjoy listening to you, hearing your opinions and points of view; it is really refreshing and it is something really needed in this beauty world of consumerism. You have inspired me to look into myself and start my own "low" or "no buy year." I have also been delaying starting my own UA-cam channel, afraid of the judgement and scrutiny, but I am ready to begin and be fearless as you have done. I hope you continue in your journey and look forward to what else you bring to the UA-cam community.
I started watching your videos just recently but I immediately fell in love with your personality! I am so glad that I discovered your channel, you inspire me in so many ways, just as example - to be reading more, writing more, loving the makeup that I already have, doing a no-buy month, a no-buy year. Thank you for being on youtube. Happy New Year!
This video is amazing, but I didn’t expect it to take that turn at the end and it made me cry because I related so HARD. You put into words something I’ve felt among certain men as well; some men that I’ve respected or thought were interesting and could be a friend and then get a strange vibe and start to question myself and why I’m not liked which leads to a insecure spiraling which makes me feel like I’ve betrayed myself. Anyway, I totally relate. Thanks for sharing and I really appreciate your balanced, honest, and eloquent videos. It’s a breath of fresh air!!
Hannah! I love your voice and the way you speak. I can sure see why you would think you are too much for some people but for me, you are just the right amount of everything 😁 I feel the same way about myself as you about yourself. I first started to listen to your videos becose I needed something to keep my mind off other things when im at work and your voice kept me relaxed even when things got stressful and I am now starting my own no buy. I wish I had a friend like you! You are so wise and unique, and not afraid to speak and be yourself. Have a happy NYE and the best 2019. I will be celebrating couple hours before you as I live in Finland :)
Hanna, we are all now better equipped to do our work in the world because you were brave enough to be your full self on your channel. It’s your strength as well as your vulnerability that has allowed so many of us to see ourselves reflected back to us (to see our sameness) as we watched your videos and to hear our voices as you shared your experiences. Thank you for reminding everyone at the end of your videos that we each have sacred work to do here in our own way with our own gifts. Your transformation is evident, and it’s only the beginning. May the same be true for all of us. 🙏🏽 Cheers to how far we’ve come and to all that is yet to come!!! 🥂
Hannah, huge props to you for your courage to be vulnerable and change. You have modeled for many the results of facing fear and doing the fearful thing anyway. And, you have been self-accessing, considerate and caring to yourself above all. Clearly a win/win. What a gift to find an audience that is receptive and responsive to your efforts to find your best version of you. Happy New Year!
Oh, Hannah, you are a breath of fresh air on UA-cam. I love how articulate you are; it’s one of the many things that drew me to you. Love you and can’t wait to see what comes next.
I just found you today and have been binge watching your videos. I really enjoy your approach to sharing your life and experience on UA-cam. Your honesty and vulnerability is really wonderful. Thank you 🙏🏼
I've never felt particularly unlikable, but I did suppress my true voice--not my opinions, but my voice itself. I realized maybe two years ago that I had one of those accidental scars that everyone acquires, associated with being called shrill (one time, in a confined space, by someone important to me). I'm a singer and I know how to be loud because of that, but while I was suppressing my girlish expressiveness and inflection, I could not talk at volume. I had to accept the judged inflection before I could talk so that other people could hear.
It's the opposite of what you describe here, I suppose--you've learned that you can be likeable through feedback in response to putting yourself out there, while in contrast I had to accept something about myself before I could start putting myself out there. Isn't personal growth great though? In the end we rise, better, faster, stronger versions of ourselves.
You're not alone getting this way. I'm the person with an MA with political science that breaks it to people (not all people) what they think or believe about politics, government, and governing is wrong. It doesn't help that I'm a large woman with blue, purple, pink, or green hair (all dependent on my hair stylist's mood and inspiration).
You are lovely. Anyone who makes you feel otherwise are more than likely trying to push their own insecurities on you.
This is an incredible thing you've accomplished. I'm not just speaking if the no-buy. You've allowed yourself to be so open and vulnerable during this whole process that is inspiring.
Yep yep, I, too, have always been "too much" even as a child. So I had to learn to stand up taller (I am a tall woman), speak up more often (I love to talk), and smile even bigger. My grandma told me I'd never be able to hide in a crowd so I might as well embrace my "gifts." Not everyone likes me but I love them all anyway because it sure was a process to learn to like myself. 💖
Once again this is why you are my favorite youtuber. That too muchness is exactly how I feel except instead of owning that I feel like I always contort to fit into the world around me. I feel like I’m always making myself smaller and always acquiescing to the people around me. I always thought I kept so much to myself because I didn’t want to be judged but part of it is that I feel that I don’t want to take up too much space in the world. Like I don’t deserve to take up that space for whatever reason. I think a lot of women feel that way about being too much and taking up too much space and you’re not alone in that. Thank you for sharing so much of your inner thoughts. It is truly appreciated! Keep making those men uncomfortable!
Oh sweet Hannah, I relate to your comment about taking up too much space and questioning whether you’re likable or not hit me closer than I would’ve liked it too. Sometimes in my life I simply feel unwelcome and I think that’s one of the most lonely feelings of all. I don’t know what to say to make it better because no one has ever said the right words to make it better for me either. But I can say that you are strong, intelligent, bold, and brave. All of those are only good things. You are exactly who you should be. Thank you for sharing this part today. What an incredible year it has been to watch you grow.
There is definitely a reason I loved your channel so much - I related to everything you said about sometimes not connecting with people. I've found that sometimes I just need to remind myself that I do have friends who accept me for who I am and that's what matters.
You’re an amazing content creator, you’re so intelligent and articulate at expressing what so many of us feel and are going through. I appreciate it so much, your fresh take on the beauty community and attitude towards consumerism. How “much” you are as a woman is beautiful and elegant and expressive and having always felt the same feelings you describe it shocked me to hear you think you are too much! Maybe I’m not either and as women we are trained to always think we should be less than we are. Don’t let anyone dim your sparkle.💖That’s what makes us each unique. Thank you so much for putting yourself and your content out there!💗
Nope - not too much. Fill your space completely! Poke out your elbows, pile up that red hair and talk your talk. Sometimes I watch just to hear how you express yourself. I don’t care about eyeshadow palettes, but hearing you describe them is fascinating. There is more than enough room for unique and genuine people like you on the Tube. Bring it on girl!
I can't believe 2018 is over, I enjoyed following your no buy, and cannot wait to see your new content😍😘
I keep going back and re-watching some of your videos as I navigate my low-buy and budgeting process. I love the way you are open and honest, articulate and opinionated, and sometimes even “too much.” I can relate so easily to you as I share similar traits. Thank you for continuing to share yourself and creating content I actually enjoy watching, that also happens to fit where I am in life.