the art of self-discovery | using alone time to find yourself
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- Опубліковано 23 тра 2024
- A huge part of my healing journey has been about finding myself in the aloneness, accepting being alone to process my thoughts and feelings, and bringing my true self to light. Don't force yourself to be around others because you're afraid of being alone. Leap into the unknown and accept the beauty that comes with it.
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Love the point you mentioned about staying in places that weren’t meant for you. Everyone tells me to get out of my comfort zone and honestly it’s led to a life of misery. The issue is that I would go and do things I knew I hated, like working office internships in accounting and finance and dealing with bosses coworkers that couldn’t care less about you. I also forced myself to be part of clubs at my school but I’m honestly no better off. I didn’t care to socialize much with these people because they were so different.
I’ve accomplished a lot with these jobs and clubs and decided that now is the time to find myself. Once I sat down with my thoughts and looked at my past interests that I threw away due the desire to chase some goals that society has shoved down my throat, l finally realized who I was:
- I want to run marathon distances like I did at 15
- I want to play guitar and arrange songs like I did a few years ago
- I want to work in agriculture/horticulture like a did as a teenager… not work an office job as an accountant, financial planner, banker, etc
- I don’t need a girlfriend because in some way I was always worse off and desired to be alone. My grandparents, parents and sister told me that having a partner is the answer, however that clearly is not the case and I honestly think it is the last thing that I need in my life right now.
- I want to make a difference and see the fruits of my labour instead of being a useless cog in the machine.
-I’m done chasing these dumb titles like Chief Research Officer since I’ve achieved that title and I didn’t feel anymore fulfilled. Funny that I only started caring about status like that a few years ago and now I couldn’t care less hahaha
I could probably go on and on but point is I want to thank you for this video! There’s absolutely no problem with being alone because as you said people come and go but we are going to be with ourselves for the rest of our lives. May as well put ourselves first and live a life we deem worth living.
Thanks again!
I’m so glad you can relate and learn so much about yourself! Thank you for watching and for sharing ❤️
Looks like YT knows i needed to hear this today lol. Love this video
Thanks for watching 😊
This is a point I am working on at the moment, being oneself in the face of other people without limiting oneself by fear of others reaction.
Ah it’s scary how much I can relate. 1% better every day love. Thanks for opening up and sharing
Thank you so much for watching ❤️
Every video you make and the dulcet tones of your voice soothes this injured heart. Please dont ever stop ❤
You’re so sweet thank you 🥺
It’s good to know how to be alone, to discover your strengths and weaknesses, to rediscover who you are, it’s powerful knowing your value. But something is off to me in this generation, as in being isolated and normalizing being alone rather than being social, friendly and communicative. Social media is affecting people perspectives on what “healing is” you don’t have to be alone to heal, you’re not alone. Talk to someone,we were born to connect !!!
Of course! There always has to be a balance. For me, it’s been easier to be alone while figuring myself out because I’m so used to taking everything from everyone so personally. Sometimes, I don’t even know what I’m feeling because I’m overstimulated and picking up on someone else’s feelings.
This is just a way to comfort others and make them not feel lonely in their journey - a way to let them know it’s okay to take this time for themselves to figure out what it is they really want from life.
@@DVNLYHealing I use to have that coping mechanism, but then I realized how damaging it became not knowing how to open up to people, not knowing how to handle my own turmoil, so killing myself in silence with my depression is what became my comfort zone. I started to feel dehumanized , confused, I couldn’t face the uncomfortable truth, i became a magnet to unhappiness and unhealthy habits. The uncomfortable of truth is no one wants to see themselves, some rather suffer and be the victim and live in their “truth” (their fantasy) rather than to tolerate the consequences of transformation. Pain is inevitable but it’s also in-reversible. Fears give an illusion to be stronger, more than what you can control, to face this challenge, seeking courage is the only rightful opponent, and to gain courage is to accept to obtain! You have to feel to heal. Avoidance is a huge issue, I wish i could say there’s an easier path but great things don’t come easy, and to know happiness is to understand sadness.
I agree with it’s okay to take time for yourself, just keep in mind there’s someone who’s willing to take time to listen.
Seek professional help if needed there’s no need to bury yourself with what you don’t understand because no one knows everything. You learn by challenging yourself to understand. Which i can see in your video you’re expressing I agree with that.
It might be hard to trust to give access to people to enter your domain, but barricading your home (inner self) you won’t leave space for your self to build.
Do what it takes to be happy, sometimes it takes letting go to let in and sometimes it takes lending a hand to balance your stance.
Give in to happiness, the secret is remembering your strength and that your human and most of all your choice to be. Love to all ❤️
Ive also become aware of the weird tension that builds up whenever im in a group setting. Like theres never a moment where Everyone is in the moment.
But i dont think people are normalizing isolation. Its technology. To call my mom in my own room. To order food from my own room. Also i feel like its trust issues that make everyone keep to themselves
@@rxchard8004 you’re right it’s definitely the media, it’s the biggest issue in today’s society. People are so intact with technology, people aren’t engaged with reality, outside their phones. It’s ridiculous how controlling it’s becoming rather than being beneficial. Is it really trust issues? Why does everyone say trust issues as in saying why they rather be alone? It sounds like an excuse to be remote, is it really a trust issue or people are hiding something deeper that makes them want to isolate? rather than to suffer reach out to a professional. It’s like this term people say “healing”, it’s so over used, but are you healing really? Or avoiding? It’s important to be honest. People are going to be in pain anyway, to love or to hate. Because of one bad relationship why let that person control your narrative? You might not trust the person yet but always trust love, people don’t get that. People are not committed to morals anymore due to lack of leaders and false information on the internet, it’s really important to disconnect from whatever this sick illusion people rather live in. I don’t know where I was going with this but your human and your not alone, every hero is fighting for someone, fight for yourself king.
@@rxchard8004 my anxiety use to made me isolate, I get that, learning how to control it can be challenging but I promise you it’s not impossible, just don’t give up
This video is absolutely beautiful and I loved watching the entire thing. The way you speak and what you say is incredibly comforting, motivating, and inspiring. It almost was like a guided meditation at times for me. I think you have a special talent in speaking because I felt like you were speaking to me, like you were connected to me.
I relate so hard to almost everything you said in this video. Being sensitive, the chameleon stuff, putting others before yourself, trying to force things, not being able to be in the moment. I’ve been in the first major period of “aloneness” in my life for over three years now. Prior to this I was always either in a relationship or searching for one relentlessly. I think you’ve learned a lot of the lessons of aloneness a lot quicker than I did, but like you I can truly say now that if I were to be alone forever, it will be okay. I’ve finally come to accept that and not try to force a relationship. With what people look for in relationships and how people act nowadays, I was beginning to lose hope in people, but I’m glad to see beautiful souls do exist. ♥
I just have to say, you have no idea how badly I needed this. Almost like an angel coming to give me a message. Thank you so much for watching and taking the time to share your thoughts with me. I really am grateful for it and I really do appreciate the support.
I’m so happy that you’re healing too and that you’ve found peace with yourself. Wishing you all the best ❤️
Inspiring message that I feel many people should hear. I've been on this self-journey in healing since the start of this year and whenever there are moments of doubts and fear that inevitably creep in, I'll come back here to remind myself to trust the process :)
Thank you so much. I appreciate the support and words of kindness. Wishing you all the best on your healing journey 🤍
You are beautiful inside and out 🌻
You’re so sweet, thank you so much 🥺
I’m so happy I found this. I’m in an opportunity where I get to live on my own away from everyone and I can’t wait to embark on this journey of self discovery. I love having my own space❤❤❤
Yay, I’m excited for you!
You nailed it
I have no idea how I found this video but it found me!
same, but im glad it did. well said and it was powerful.
Glad it found you! Thanks for watching ❤️
So sweet, thanks for watching! Hoping it can help you in some way 😊
I've been alone since last November, I stopped hanging out with my friends who were not the best influence in my life. It's been weird, but I've never felt more at peace. I don't feel the need to fit in or to not be myself out of fear of losing friends. It's a freeing experience that I'm glad I'm going through right now. Also when you mentioned that you've separated the soul from your body, that hit deep because I've recently started viewing myself the same way. I haven't heard anyone else say that, maybe we've reached monk status now lol
I’m glad you’re able to be yourself now with no fears! That’s great. I know you’ll meet the right people when you’re just being yourself. Idk if we’ve reached monk status yet but we’re on the right path for now.
Thanks for watching, and I’m wishing you the best!
Thanks for the reply! Good luck with your channel, I’m looking forward to what you do next!
slay
Thanks boo 🫶🏼
People conform out of fear of rejection. Rejecting yourself from society to be alone is not it. You can eat alone at a restaurant and chat w the waitress.
Being alone and feeling lonely are different.
When youre in constant need of approval and reassurance, you get detached from yourself and rely on peoples OPINIONS.
One rule to be alone is to not give a fuck.
You wouldnt know what your missing out until you stop fearing.
Yes, the ego looks for approval and validation. The point here is to be accepting of who you are and be so firm in who you are, that you don’t need to look for outside validation. You are right when you say it’s important to just not give a f, but that’s difficult for a lot of people. I don’t want anyone to ostracize themselves from society and not have any human interaction. I just want for people to not force themselves to be someone they’re not and not force relationships/friendships that aren’t meant for them.
Thanks for taking the time to watch and share your thoughts!
Don'y stay alone too long. You might get
used to it. Not good.
Of course! Just figuring out myself and what I want. I know the right people will come in when the time is right :)
Good answer. Wishing you the best.
@@DVNLYHealingim doing the same right now. And just as you did not long ago, ended a long and toxic relationship with my gf. Now staying alone to understand myself and love myself first, so i can love another again one day.
Will you go on a date with me?
Don't forget to make a video in a few years crying and wondering why you can't get the relationship you want.
Also, do you live in a cat friendly appartement?
I'm guessing you watched about the first 3 minutes of the video and assumed she was like the women who are unwilling to give anything in a relationship and are just looking to find a man that will do everything for her / give everything to her. That's not the case, and I'm pretty sure in a few years she'll have a great relationship because she took the time to put herself first and heal. But even if not, a cat or two would be better companions than many people would be 😉
I’ll make sure to have a space big enough for a cat and a dog :)