How To Find Peace For A Marriage In Turmoil

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  • Опубліковано 21 гру 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 120

  • @eileenfuentes6975
    @eileenfuentes6975 Рік тому +13

    This, to me, is a perfect description of the Serenity Prayer.
    "God grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference. (And work on my PIES)"😊

  • @russclifford5588
    @russclifford5588 4 роки тому +61

    Thank you, each morning I come back to one of your videos and it straightens my path for the day. I’m in the UK and on Saturday just gone my partner of 18 years and the mother of our teenage son told me she didn’t love me anymore. I found you in my darkest moment on Saturday night and I’ve avoided doing all the wrong things that would otherwise seem a natural response. I’m hurting more than I’ve ever done but I’m also hopeful. Thank you for your help.

    • @adamwilliams2679
      @adamwilliams2679 4 роки тому +10

      I hope things have gotten better for you. It's been two months since the woman who has called herself my wife for over a decade suddenly decided we aren't actually married and took off her ring because she started getting feelings for a kid the same age as our daughter and decided he would make a nice boyfriend. I'm apparently supposed to be fine with this, as she's decided she'll be in a relationship with both of us. This video put some stuff in perspective, but I still wish he might maybe pass out and drown while frequenting the hot springs he loves so much...

    • @grateful7785
      @grateful7785 4 роки тому +4

      @Adam and Russ...how are you guys doing and how's your situation going? I hope you're both in a better place. I'm a wife that's really struggling and understanding your feelings. Peace, Hope and Love to you.

    • @TheForeverLoveKD
      @TheForeverLoveKD 3 роки тому +1

      @@grateful7785 how are you.. I'm also a wife.. Whom going to lose my identity as a wife of my husband.

    • @anna_i_love_living
      @anna_i_love_living 3 роки тому

      🙏🙏🙏

    • @anna_i_love_living
      @anna_i_love_living 3 роки тому

      @@adamwilliams2679 🙏🙏🙏

  • @CalmChaos369
    @CalmChaos369 5 років тому +27

    I have been with my wife who was my best friend for 12 years.....18 May 2019 was to be our 5 year wedding anniversary. I had a negative mind set, was unkind and did not respect my wife. what would have been our 5 yr anniversary was just another day because we legally separated just one month before. I am in therapy now, learning mindfulness and becoming a better man and dad to our 2 young children. I am at rock bottom now and building myself up and I thank you for your videos. I told her I have let her go but I am not giving up hope.

    • @mrtracyut
      @mrtracyut 4 роки тому

      I hope you got back together. Peace to you.

    • @adamwilliams2679
      @adamwilliams2679 4 роки тому

      As someone who is trying to develop some of those things myself, I hope you are well and your hope has been rewarded.

  • @lorimeyers5551
    @lorimeyers5551 4 роки тому +18

    I'm pretty sure you are the first person on this subject who makes sense! Bless you for your work. I am soo grateful to have stumbled upon these videos at exactly the right time!

  • @sebastiandinapoli3912
    @sebastiandinapoli3912 5 років тому +31

    This video was released at exactly the right time for me. This was exactly what I needed right now. As you pointed out, it’s all easier said than done but it’s a start. The issues in this video are the exact things I’m struggling with right now. Thank you.

    • @elyracristina4046
      @elyracristina4046 5 років тому +3

      Hi Sebastian..I did very struggling b4..its so hard to experience those kind of anxiety and depression..but believe me trust to our God and let other good frnds and family to keep in touch..in this world if u are weak u cant achieve and get peace of mind..try to validate ur self and the situation..try to think right and positive bcoz the first thing can help u is ur self it self..I know its sux when u are in that kind of situation but u need to help ur self to fight to bring back ur self esteem and confidence..God dont give up on u so hold him tight and pray sincerely to lesser the pain so u can manage it..1 day when u wake up theres a miracle gonna happens bcoz u didnt feel the same pain anymore..so my frnd keep fight to find true happiness and keep watching this kind of therapy help ur self..if I did b4 and relief now yes u can do it as well..proper sleep and try to eat well then look ur self in the mirror...love ur self b4 love others..so u can bring true happiness to ur love ones..have faith no matter how hard it is..start today and dont waste ur time to find ur happiness..

  • @ingridaccount
    @ingridaccount 3 роки тому +4

    Joe Beam and Marriage Helper. Thank you for giving us hope!

  • @brennavallarino7961
    @brennavallarino7961 4 роки тому +11

    1 yr since I found out about my husband’s affair and this is literally the best online advice I have yet to come across.
    Thank you for sharing your wisdom. It’s appreciated more than you’ll ever know.

    • @TheForeverLoveKD
      @TheForeverLoveKD 3 роки тому +1

      Brenna, sorry to hear that. how are you.. Did you forgive him?

  • @isabelvelasco6545
    @isabelvelasco6545 5 років тому +5

    My husband is in limberance right now with another woman from his past that cheated on him. I asked him to leave when I learned of it on 9/22/19. I’m on day #22 of this nightmare. I’m coping by prayer, staying busy and processing my hurt with couple of good people Gods put in my life. I thank you for your videos.

    • @saanisa
      @saanisa 4 роки тому +1

      Isabel Velasco I hope you are feeling better.

  • @rdblk84
    @rdblk84 5 років тому +16

    I emotionally destroyed my wife, I allowed my family abuse her emotions for years and I did little or nothing about it. She's now very cold towards me. We don't talk much, laugh or do things together anymore. She told me that she love me but not in love with me. We are still in the same house and sleep in the same bed but at this point, we're nothing but glorified roommates. Damn, I want my loving wife back!

    • @jonesboy9191
      @jonesboy9191 5 років тому +5

      Follow the instructions. Work on you being a better husband. Read books on being a better husband, read books on manhood, work out, find hobbies. Control what you can control which you reactions and work in the marriage iand accept reality of the situation. I been through this. Hope this helps you.

    • @mysticmama_3692
      @mysticmama_3692 4 роки тому +5

      Me and my husband still laugh and joke, but he says he doesnt feel that spark for me anymore. Feels like I wasn't there for him. I'm doing everything I can to make it clear I am working to better myself and want to be a better wife. Perhaps you should start with talking to your family, and telling them they are no longer allowed to degrade your wife, it will do a lot to show her that you are choosing to be with her.

  • @marksanders2921
    @marksanders2921 3 роки тому +6

    This is just like the Serenity prayer.

  • @leticiacobarrubias9920
    @leticiacobarrubias9920 5 років тому +14

    I've heard all those words from my husband. Yet he's still here... what can I do?😔 I can't tell him to go I love him. Wow you are an amazing man 🙏 thank you for explaining to us these things.

    • @jessedphillips
      @jessedphillips 5 років тому +1

      Check out the website, these videos, and the podcasts. Practice SMART Contact and work on your PIES! Check out the secret facebook page.

    • @elyracristina4046
      @elyracristina4046 5 років тому

      U did a great job Leticia..when u love someone u wont give up easily..u always fight and believe to that person bcoz that's the magic of love..rescue him and try to bring back his love for u..I know it wasnt easy but in time if both of u meant to be it always happen well..so keep fighting and love..

    • @gladysbin9174
      @gladysbin9174 5 років тому

      jessedphillips what the name of the secret Facebook page

  • @hamidreza200
    @hamidreza200 4 роки тому +6

    God Bless You this man, a life changer, one minute of his video changed my life forever... his voice and his heart has a piece of God’s words in it, you will be in heaven because of impact you have in people’s life.

  • @warda1322
    @warda1322 3 роки тому +3

    Listening and watching the videos on any topics it gives me strength and trying to focus. My husband said I took 10 years of his life, that’s why he hate me, will never love and he will make my life miserable. I have try to stay strong. Thank you

  • @katiebr
    @katiebr 5 років тому +6

    What’s knowledge!!! It’s so hard but you give me hope

  • @cinnamonjunction1
    @cinnamonjunction1 3 роки тому +3

    What a wonderful, relaxing voice! Content is great as well

  • @s4lj4y
    @s4lj4y 5 років тому +33

    Yeahhhh, if someone is putting me in that situation of hoping they'll choose me over someone else, I will make the choice easy for them and remove myself from the equation. Not going to stand around and wait to be chosen. I choose myself. Bye!

    • @adamwilliams2679
      @adamwilliams2679 4 роки тому +9

      Sadly that's where I feel I am right now. Unofficial wife of 16 years just decided she wants a boyfriend on the side and feels okay with it because "we never actually got married," even though she has called me her husband in front of the world until two months ago when she started spending time with this scuzzy, smelly manchild who is our daughter's age. That's when she took off her ring and told me everything that's wrong with me and everything that's right with him. Now she says what she has with each of us is special and she won't give either of us up. When you've built a life and family with someone for 16 years, it's not easy to just walk away. I don't want to. I want to keep her from making the biggest mistake of her life, but I guess that falls on the "can't control" side. Anyway, I hope you are well a year later.

    • @r.8995
      @r.8995 4 роки тому +1

      @@adamwilliams2679 she's unfortunately probably already banged him. 2020 sucks

    • @tresfielder3148
      @tresfielder3148 2 роки тому

      👏👏👏👏👏

    • @eileenfuentes6975
      @eileenfuentes6975 Рік тому +1

      That was me until I was in my situation. And I'm not a doormat. 😊

  • @808Affliction
    @808Affliction 2 роки тому +4

    This video hit me good. Thank you, I just need to accept it. 🙏🏼

  • @wintergoddess8210
    @wintergoddess8210 4 роки тому +5

    This man is wonderful help , Thank you 😊

  • @joyobessa1364
    @joyobessa1364 5 років тому +15

    Hey Dr. Joe, thank you for your kind words of wisdom! I was just about to do the opposite of your advice! I thank God that I stumbled upon this video clip today just before I made my foolish move! I pray that one day I can put up my testimony to share with everyone in here struggling with their relationships including myself! Thanks to you and your team who are working tirelessly to offer free help, comfort and support through teachable clips like these! God bless you guys! 💕🙏

  • @gking5584
    @gking5584 5 років тому +7

    Excellent advise. I wish I found this earlier. 🙏🏻

  • @moyaking8961
    @moyaking8961 5 років тому +8

    Thank you for this video it's just the advice that I needed.

  • @SlyceMan
    @SlyceMan Рік тому +1

    I wait and God will let me know.

  • @briang3375
    @briang3375 5 років тому +5

    Sadly he is right about most counsellors. The counsellors we've seen all are afraid of the wife and want to beat up on the husband. They think the wife is the virtuous o e and the husband is either a scumbag liar or something worse. They're more diplomats married to the process rather than healing the marriage.

    • @AOthon1975
      @AOthon1975 2 роки тому +2

      Amen to that. I don't trust counsellors.

  • @fightformarriage1665
    @fightformarriage1665 5 років тому +4

    Continue to love yalls content!!!!!

  • @angelica4029
    @angelica4029 3 роки тому +4

    I don't know if there's any hope left for my marriage because my wife said she wants out and doesn't love me anymore. It hurts a lot.

  • @mrindiha4325
    @mrindiha4325 3 роки тому

    Today around 1am one beautiful woman asked me for a date but I refused her suddenly your face came infront of me you know how much I have emotional connection with you

  • @VanessaSimon26
    @VanessaSimon26 Рік тому +1

    Thank you 🙏🏽

  • @dushankamaragoda9693
    @dushankamaragoda9693 5 років тому +2

    Hi Dr Joe, thank you for your advice. Do you anyone is Sydney Australia who is like you? That could help with marriage. Thank you.

  • @emiliogarza5227
    @emiliogarza5227 5 років тому +2

    My heart hurts so bad hearing this, she says that he is the male version of her and that I was 10 years to late to save my marriage....

  • @eileenfuentes6975
    @eileenfuentes6975 Рік тому +1

    Do you have any testimonials from people who worked on their pies, what they did in particular for their pies journey and how it ended up?

  • @AbdouAzizMané-v5z
    @AbdouAzizMané-v5z Рік тому +2

    Encore je vous proclame vraiment que moi je m'engage volontairement pour trouvé l'amour entre humaines qui est une relations vraie et meilleures

  • @deepakkotakota9554
    @deepakkotakota9554 4 роки тому +1

    Love and care shud be from inner self..how does it show in our actions....

  • @TherealStewey
    @TherealStewey 5 років тому +3

    Wow this dr is very good, everything is on point what he is saying

  • @nitichadha6988
    @nitichadha6988 2 роки тому +1

    Anxiety in marriage relatioship now want move n want happy again good life.

  • @iamjuliemango
    @iamjuliemango 5 років тому +1

    Wow. How have I not found this before?

  • @sinanrashid2987
    @sinanrashid2987 5 років тому

    Excellent, one of the most powerful speech.

  • @mRuKjoe
    @mRuKjoe 5 років тому +5

    Couple counseling will lead to divorce 8 out 10 couples. One spouse:I want a divorce. The other spouse, let’s work on it.
    Counselor: get a divorce and stop working on this marriage. That will be $200 and I can see you two individually next week, you on Tuesday and you on Thursday. I ll give u guys a discount, $180 each session

    • @janinenankervis3290
      @janinenankervis3290 5 років тому

      J Jung
      That rings true - my spouse went to a psychologist to quit smoking - my partner says, “I’ll give it up when I retire “. Counsellor says “that sounds like a good plan”. Nine years later he still smokes and never went back to the psychologist, and now at 67 he doesn’t care less: “I’ll never give up” - and is definitely showing signs of emphysema. I had hoped he would see sense well before now but now I’m just listening to him cough all the time and waiting to die.

    • @mysticmama_3692
      @mysticmama_3692 4 роки тому +1

      EXACTLY!

  • @mysticmama_3692
    @mysticmama_3692 4 роки тому +1

    Yep, yep and yep...

  • @Benny.13
    @Benny.13 5 років тому +4

    Prob is once they become intimate with another person they are no longer a viable option and people panic and do desperate acts to prevent this especially once kids are involved.Why no contact doesn’t make sense cause your literally giving them a key to the bedroom with another!?Most people won’t take a partner back after they been with another but some do.

    • @allanikol3235
      @allanikol3235 3 роки тому

      ask yourself this question before making a choice that may ruin you forever, do you love her? if you do have you been the only one she loved before you met her? unless she was a virgin she must have been intimate with someone else before yet you still went ahead and married her. What of you as a person havent you ever been intimate with a girl who wasnt a virgin? whats the difference. Forgive and Heal thats what you need and you can accept her back.

    • @emohbrisnicki7648
      @emohbrisnicki7648 Рік тому +1

      Marriage Helper claim to have a 75% success rate and most couples who they work with are healing from affairs.
      I think you don't know what it's truely like until you've lived in the situation yourself. Many people assume breakup is the only rational answer. But it is very possible to forgive when you love your spouse, understand what drove them to affair (could be your neglect, negativity, etc) and want to keep your family together.

    • @lynnhampton6269
      @lynnhampton6269 5 місяців тому

      What does he know about being the suffering betrayed spouse? He was the cheater in his marriage. I’d love to hear his wife’s side of the story.

    • @Benny.13
      @Benny.13 5 місяців тому

      @@allanikol3235 that’s actually an amazing point? I never thought of it that way .

  • @SuperHeroFX
    @SuperHeroFX 11 місяців тому

    Thank you

  • @mmasabataphetla6910
    @mmasabataphetla6910 2 роки тому +2

    My marriage is falling r😔 please help.i been with my husband for 26 yes and nothing goes well😭

  • @happygirl1641
    @happygirl1641 5 років тому +4

    Perfection!

  • @efthimios
    @efthimios 5 років тому +10

    Good hope all cheaters that destroy their marriage and families and up in a broken relationship with their affair partner...scumbags cheat period

  • @calistalynch1202
    @calistalynch1202 2 роки тому +1

    Is it ever to late to try?

    • @MarriageHelper
      @MarriageHelper  2 роки тому

      Hey Calista Lynch, we believe it's NEVER too late to try. Just out of curiosity, have you taken advantage of our free mini course? We know times are tough and want to provide as much as we can to you free of charge. That's why we created this free mini course. It will teach you how to get your spouse back and give you a plan moving forward! You can get access to it directly by following this link:
      your.marriagehelper.com/how-to-get-your-spouse-back-mini-course

  • @joycem6020
    @joycem6020 2 роки тому +1

    My husband left me and went to Thailand. I was devastated and he decided to tell me we officially separated.

    • @MarriageHelper
      @MarriageHelper  2 роки тому

      Hey Joyce M, so sorry to hear you are going through this. Because of the complexity of this situation, we would strongly advise you reach out to us directly! You can call us at 1 (866) 903 0990 and be connected with one of our Client Representatives who will guide you to the best resources we have available for your situation. You can also schedule the call yourself for a time that works best for you by following this link: marriagehelper.com/marriage-strategy-call/
      We look forward to speaking with you directly if you will allow it!

  • @thatnineallday
    @thatnineallday 3 роки тому +1

    Man it hurts so bad I don’t know what to do I’m in shut down mode don’t wanna work don’t wanna do anything

  • @sangeetaruia4977
    @sangeetaruia4977 5 років тому +2

    Wht about the spouse who has multiple affairs?

  • @kathywieland9246
    @kathywieland9246 2 роки тому +2

    Can i get some help even if i live in australia

    • @davidbarnett8543
      @davidbarnett8543 2 роки тому

      Kathy Wieland did you find out if we can get help here in Australia

    • @deborahrouse5644
      @deborahrouse5644 9 місяців тому

      They help EVERYONE from all over the world.

  • @azwaayuni
    @azwaayuni 5 років тому +2

    If the husband had an affair with someone’s wife, Is contacting the wife’s husband/family is within our control or out of our control?

    • @emohbrisnicki7648
      @emohbrisnicki7648 Рік тому +1

      Within your control but will likely push your husband away. Focus on bettering yourself and being more attractive to your spuse and not trying to sabotage them. Dr says something like that in video.

  • @georgew.5639
    @georgew.5639 4 роки тому +1

    I couldn’t agree more. Thank you.

  • @stevemines6870
    @stevemines6870 2 роки тому +1

    Question say they don't love you what are you fighting for not loving you is real like what you said about control.

  • @eastsiderider
    @eastsiderider 2 роки тому

    What are you thought on separation leading to peace’s and reconciliation?

  • @izalecanidate8610
    @izalecanidate8610 4 роки тому

    good Advice

  • @lornarico5579
    @lornarico5579 5 років тому +2

    hi sir, do you have topics about emotional infidelity resulting to a child?

  • @johnsantos3392
    @johnsantos3392 5 років тому +2

    I want to save my marriage. Pse help me

  • @sylviamorales7820
    @sylviamorales7820 5 років тому +4

    I need help , sometimes don’t know if I can get thru. I want to save my marriage , he says he ended everything with the lo. But I know he keeps calling her . Why? One point said Wanted to come back with me. Then why keep calling her. He is staying at my daughter home. After everything was out .with me he only text , im doing smart contact

    • @elyracristina4046
      @elyracristina4046 5 років тому +2

      Hello Sylvia..dont push too hard
      .the more u pushing it ..the more he thinking ur not the right one..try to show that ur the best partner to him..stop Analyzing what his doing..just follow the flow for a while..then give him reason why he need to choose u and stay with u..help ur self to make it light and try to become understanding for now..try to talk to him nicely and try to get back the intensity and flirt sometimes..remind him how happy both of u b4..and dont forget to give time for ur self..be happy so if he can see that from u he will be inspired again..believe to self and to ur love..u can make it just pray hard and faith to him..

  • @bobbob9364
    @bobbob9364 4 роки тому +2

    Head palm ,life is meant to be fun to enjoy

    • @deborahrouse5644
      @deborahrouse5644 9 місяців тому

      Sorry, but life isn't all fun and games by its very nature! There will ALWAYS be ups and downs.

  • @moyaking8961
    @moyaking8961 5 років тому +1

    Can I ask you a question? My husband wants to remain friends with his ex mistress (this affair ended only 4 days ago) I've said no. Am I right or wrong???

    • @roxygutz2510
      @roxygutz2510 5 років тому +9

      Moya King if there was a sexual relationship involved then that is no friend and that is definitely a boundary that needs to be set. A loving husband would not even consider this friendship before his wife.

    • @jessedphillips
      @jessedphillips 5 років тому +3

      Absolutely not. You shouldcheck out the MH website. There is a ton of good information there. All ties should be cut with the Affair partner.

    • @MarriageHelper
      @MarriageHelper  5 років тому +3

      Hey Moya,
      We have a few recommendations for this situation specifically. We have lots of articles online on our website if you visit MarriageHelper.com.
      Also, this video is about what happens if your spouse has had an affair and what you should and should not do! We hope you find this helpful!
      ua-cam.com/video/0Ob8dJGH72Q/v-deo.html
      Blessings,
      Marriage Helper

  • @mrindiha4325
    @mrindiha4325 3 роки тому

    Yes i am in party with my vip friends

  • @youig5090
    @youig5090 4 роки тому +3

    I don’t see hope in my marriage

  • @jeanettekniebusch9812
    @jeanettekniebusch9812 3 роки тому

    Loding Integrity accepying such distrspect.oh have fun f ... somrone else!

  • @bobbob9364
    @bobbob9364 4 роки тому +2

    I have not met my future wife but am concerned she will get my pension when we split,

    • @nafsuzzakiyyakabiru9991
      @nafsuzzakiyyakabiru9991 2 роки тому

      I can recommend you to a man who helped me bring back my ex permanent he can also help you.......

    • @nafsuzzakiyyakabiru9991
      @nafsuzzakiyyakabiru9991 2 роки тому

      I can recommend you to a man who helped me bring back my ex permanent he can also help you.......

    • @SARASARA-jh6jo
      @SARASARA-jh6jo Рік тому

      Don’t do it
      People change

  • @lynnhampton6269
    @lynnhampton6269 5 місяців тому

    So accept the cheating adulterous spouse and tell yourself it’s your fault. Don’t do anything negative to the other party.

  • @tataiinsertlastnamehere6471
    @tataiinsertlastnamehere6471 4 роки тому +1

    Accept he's a manipulative liar?

  • @MalloryJB
    @MalloryJB 5 років тому +1

    Yes I do want it to end and no I don’t care 😂 divorce it is.

  • @MalloryJB
    @MalloryJB 5 років тому +3

    Yes I do want it to end and no I don’t care 😂 divorce it is.