Is there a male loneliness epidemic? | Spotlight
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- Опубліковано 6 бер 2024
- Richard Reeves, author of the book Of Boys and Men, discusses why so many men are falling behind and feeling lonely - and what can be done to help.
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![How We Became the Loneliest Generation [Documentary]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/I19btmIBhx0/mqdefault.jpg)
![How We Became the Loneliest Generation [Documentary]](/img/tr.png)
They actually don’t care about Male loneliness.
The fact that the reporter talked more about “women and girls” than about Men and boys when the topic is about Male loneliness is EXTREMELY telling.
They don't care about us but they want us to go fight Iran, Russia and China "in the name of freedom" but who's freedom,? Womens? Billionaires? Politicians and their families?
the elites dont care
fr also i like your pfp you look like your a dj music artist
I actually feel a lot safer with how these feminist talks about male issues end with "this should not be about them, just let them lose". Because in the moment they actually decide to interveen it will be to curtail young boys' lives and make them more miserable.
I have found it is better to be alone than around others who make me wish I was alone
Poetry 😂
That makes two of us. Pretty sure there's many
💯
Yes, trying to force men or women into relationships that add nothing to their lives is not going to improve society.
I actually dont like people i love loneliness and solitude so being alone is peace to me.
Male privilege is being told you're toxic and creepy your entire life... and then being condemned when you don't make connections out of fear and insecurity.
You're also abusive and controlling when you set boundaries.
You can't be serious bro.
did you even listen to the video? he said to do it in good faith bro
Because it's all of those things and more. Male tears, sweet as honey!
Men aren't the ones calling other men toxic and creepy, so why don't you try and connect with them? And I mean really connect with them, not just sit together in silence and make the occasional joke.
I'm 36 my social life has grinded to a halt within the past 6 years. I literally just work eat and sleep
I am the same age. After seeing half of my old friends grinding away at some job, single, the others are walled into family life. I think something went terribly wrong starting a bit before us.
Then join social groups, do a sport, find a hobby. It's really not that hard. Many are in the same boat and that's why all these things exist
@@mattymattffs No time when you work 9-5
@@mattymattffs It is too "really that hard".
To copy the OP, I'm 41 and my social life was never really a thing to begin with. I've done the whole work, eat and sleep thing since I was 19. Shut myself out from the world at 15. Always been alone, crippling anxiety. Full of fear. Afraid of living, afraid of socializing and interacting.
Afraid of what people think of me, afraid of looking into someones eyes for more than a second. A full blown loser you could say and it's so shameful how I let my life just slip away never letting my full potential come to fruition.
To the OP 36-year old, I wish you better luck and more fearlessness.
They want us separed, no unions, no associations, no groups. They don't want changes of power. Women don't do revolutions.
As a young man (19 years old), I honestly feel so distant with a vast majority of people. Whenever I try to bond with people I always just feel like I never get past the surface level, and I ultimately end up moving away from those people. I get frustrated with myself because of how much I struggle to form meaningful relationships with others. However I still have a small group of friends that I cherish, and I do whatever I can to make sure they know they mean something to me. Another thing that also is so confusing is that I’ve honestly lost track of what it means to be a man. On one hand you have people telling you to be more masculine, but then you have others talking about toxic masculinity and say “All men are trash.” It makes me feel like I’m constantly walking on eggshells trying to figure out how I “should” act, which in turn has made me behave passively and avoid connecting with others. However, I find it to be particularly predatory when these “red pilled” men/influencers use their platform to promote misogynistic ideologies and behavior which teaches men to become close minded and irrational leaving them unable to make proper sense of our world. It only further fuels the flames and further exacerbates the problem. It’s sad to see both men and women going after and degrading each other, when we ought to be looking out for each other. With social media it just makes it even more difficult to navigate life and how I should carry myself. I apologize if what I wrote is kinda a mess, I just wanted to give my insight! :)
Such a thoughtful post, you're going to do just fine. That small group of friends and your desire to connect and keep trying, that's it right there.
@@lyndagabriel6539 Thank you for the kind words, they mean a lot!
@@lyndagabriel6539 Thank you for the kind words, I really appreciate it!
@@willtalley4753 Sure thing! My puppy has taught me a lot about connecting with people... despite being deadly cute and super social, only about 15% of the people we pass on the street light up and want the love she's offering for free! If she can't connect with everyone, it means it's natural that none of us can.
@@willtalley4753 Sure thing! My puppy has taught me a lot about natural connections with others... despite being deadly cute and super social, only about 15% of the people we pass on the street light up and want the free love she's offering. If she can't connect with everyone, it means it's natural that we can't either... and I see her appreciating the fraction who lit up.
Learning to be happy by yourself is one of the greatest things you can achieve in this world
Happy by yourself is a pipe dream. Humans are social creatures who cohabitate with others. We are not meant to be “alone”.
Yes. It is part of growing up. When you realize that what others think about you is not that important. And your actions should not be dictated by creating a good image of yourself for other ppl.
@@Flavor_Flav this is not a competition. While I agree that having the right person in your life is a key, I can’t say it’s only women or men. It’s hard to find people because we are not actually out there looking. We are scrolling through digital catalogs. We are also told not to be vulnerable and open with one another. People treat one another as disposable things. Even friendships don’t appear as strong as they used to. One good friend can replace 100 Facebook ones, yet we are more concerned with the many and not just one. We do need to rethink how we build relationships all together and start scaling back social media exposure and reliance on everything digital. Computers have a place in our lives and are here to stay. We don’t have to become cyborgs to continue our existence. We need more real conversations and less online time. Which is exactly what I am about to do right now. Have a nice day!
Not the best advice though
@@Flavor_Flav main reason, we demand affordable housing, affordable expenses, deduction on tax. Job security, assets security on divorce ‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼
The internet has ruined society.
Internet is just a tool. Mankind is ruining society.
Ok how about no. It is just a tool.
Soyciety
@@killy374 Meh, I see it akin to introducing a substance or a technology to a population that can't handle it mentally. Firewater comes to mind.
@killy374 a tool that spray depression, personality disorder, anxiety, stress, dependency, narcissist disorder and way much more.
The internet is so bad that the number of kids on pills has sky rockets since the internet exists.
It will only get worse with AI.
I volunteer with youth and the boys are really struggling
AS THEY SHOULD.
It's a sad reality. They've unfortunately have no male role models anymore it seems..?
@@shellz831tell us you're part of the problem without telling us...
I know that my nephew is especially after the plandemic and so are some of his friends they are 16
@@shellz831Êtes-vous androgyne ?
Male privilege is having friends when your a kid but when you hit puberty your told your societal role is future provider/protector but also a predator/killer and that the only way to prevent the latter is to share your feelings. Only for those to be used against you or laughed at by both men & women.
Blame corn, dating apps, and no homes, we've been culturally and financially castrated.
Like, popcorn? Corn on the cob? Green Giant niblets?
@scrumpadelic
Yes, you got to watch out for carbs.
Dating apps do work if you avoid the weirdos.
@@silvertone1 I just meant a good meaningful relationship not just random creepers
@@Bunny11344I used dating apps for many years and never once seen a single normal person on them
People youve been friends with you whole life will turn their backs on you the moment your health fades
This experience has taught me a lot.
Never hide who you are to please or make others comfortable
I lost my job a few years ago. I was single and my whole world crashed on me. I did not get a text from any of my friends until I reached out to a couple of them. No one thought to check in on me and I was to the point of contemplating suicide.
@@TBonerton HOPE YOU ARE DOING BETTER NOW!
Keep on fighting!
@@TBonerton I understand your feelings but remember that nothing ever got better with suicide.
There is an EVERYONE lonliness epidemic but men are the most overlooked. We need more coverage of this! Men are disproportionately affected😢
main reason, we demand affordable housing, affordable expenses, deduction on tax. Job security, assets security on divorce ‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼
@@mazedar_tv I don’t think so 😂😂😂😂😂 And women don’t have to deal with it. 😂😂😂 Gender equality is changing ❤
@@TheJlee28 i didnt get what u r saying, there was nothing against women or any inequality in my comment
@@TheJlee28what is a woman?
@@ThinkPolisComing4Me ask Trudy 😝
i can't afford a social life. let alone a family.
I've definitely worked jobs where it's a pretty small crew, sometimes out of town. Doing that, when you're also single, and it's winter? Oh boy, it can definitely feel isolating at times.
At least you have a small crew for sometimes
100% I used to work in the oil field in northern Alberta.
You could see men break at different times.
I'm 57 and still waiting for my privilege to kick in.
Gotta be a passport bro
Ditto.
Sounds like your self pity is standing in front of your privilege so you can't see it
There is no male privilege.
@@lizliz4186what privilege?
Male loneliness rates sky rocket along with suicide rates, women most effected.
Actually it's men most effected
I'm alone, but not lonely.
With that profile picture it seems like you'd wanna be
I love being left alone, i enjoy my own company
i am not alone, but....
@@BlessedBuns exactly.. 😅😅😅😅 point one finger at others and 3 back at you 😂😂😂😂
it's a historical quote
That's a ridiculously important discussion. Well done with this segment.
I think this is a very important conversation to start having. No one should feel alienated from society.
Tell that to trudeau voters who want to take property away from citizens and freeze their bank accounts.
Guys the world is really fun alone. Just get out there and have fun. You only have one life so live it well.
what do you do for fun alone?
Only solo travel world, but bar and parties not fo lonely persons@@chadwellington2524
@@chadwellington2524 Hit the gym, club, random party / events u find online in ur area, hobbies etc. You're in control of your time. It's fun as well because i've formed different groups for different things and none of them expect me to hover around them 24/7. Nomadic lifestyle in a sense.
@@chadwellington2524 chess(internet), drawing, writing, training, socializing some times but most time alone, thinking, take walks, creating universes in my own mind. There are millions of things to do alone, you just need some time to be with other people but most of the time , alone time is great , for me at least
The worst thing you can have for society is a lot of unattached (relationship/career) young men under 35. That's where extremism and lashing out at society comes from; we are only a few years away from that.
Good. I cannot wait. ❤
This is why they’re afraid of people like Andrew Tate and need to silence them. It’s not an “alpha male” talking smack, it’s charismatic men able to rally young men and topple society that they’re scared of.
you have a point @@americancapitalist9094
@@killy374 Once the guns start blazing, you never know who's gonna win. I promise you, this is not a gamble anyone should want to take.
How's Tate's toppling doing? I hear he's back in the klink.
I'm 72 , nothing new here.
ha ha u r legend dude, thats good one btw :)
Yeah good one
You might wanna head to Thailand sooner rather than later
OK boomer
@@ParissaKhoury I was there in the 70's. It was great, especially
Ko Samui
Men treat other men like competition and mock each other for having feelings, of course men are lonely. How can you feel connected to anyone if you hate everyone?
Interesting how men love projection bthat on women yet women are out here supporting each other while men aren’t 😂
hugs to men dealing with lonesomeness
we dont need ur hug, we demand affordable housing, affordable expenses, deduction on tax. Job security, assets security on divorce ‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼
🤗
You figure that out yourself hug denier @@mazedar_tv
@@mazedar_tv 💯💯 ✔✔
Every men afraid of divorce , because your life ruined after,
millenials grew up with media and society saying that men are a certain stereotype, and now that they are adults, they are being told that stereotype is not allowed anymore. It shouldn't be too surprising that they are all hiding away from this new society
This is the mood lately. Having a tough time finding strong friendships 😢
It's the internet. We don't need each other anymore. Sadly we like our technology better.
@@brandont4693Exactly
Agreed. Was just having this conversation with my wife.
I counter this loneliness by living in rooming houses with shared utilities. I'm part of a comunity of generally friendly people, and we support eachother.
However, I've actually experienced a drop in online interactions since covid; social media, MMOs, VR social platforms. It's been a flip in the connections I make.
Oh come on even 20 years ago the nerdy of us were stuck on MMOs. I remember playing osrs when it was under a year old
Utube doesn't help when they delete many comments!
Nothing like gooning with the gang in VRChat.
When you portray men as the villains on social media, they WILL become your villains on social media.
Can you give an example?
@@forecitethe Gillette ad
@@foreciterewatch this convo wherein the journalist asks whether we should really be talking about men at all after the interviewee has already mentioned the disproportionate suicide rates between men and women.
@@NotANameist That's not an example of villainizing men.
😅😅😅 so immature
This is a really sensitive and difficult subject to discuss nowadays but Reeves breaks it down in such a simple and respectful way. I really think all men would be able to identify with one or more of the issues he's mentioned.
Common Sense, main reason, we demand affordable housing, affordable expenses, deduction on tax. Job security, assets security on divorce ‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼
Men need to quit the alpha male podcast and women quit the girlboss morning tv and both sexes need to sit on a roundtable and have an honest conversation
won't happen
@@bb.buchanan 😂
marxists won’t allow that it’s division division division
No, pro male podcasts may be the only thing holding back even worse outcomes.
@@bb.buchanan bullshit
Oh please ..... being alone is the smartest thing i have ever done ...
Yes, 40%+ divorce rate in Canada. Divorce is when men are losing money, real estate, pay alimonies for the kids they barely see and therefore being raised not the way the father would like. Learn from other men's mistakes who has been ripped off their money and time.
Being alone is different from being lonely
Marriage is supposed to be a sacred bond, for better or worse. This is a lesson for all men and women to learn to trust each other and build a balance of positive and negative relationships. @user-kh6ld5zn9t
@@Beech1900pilot exactly, its more deep than it sounds
I know of someone who married a man, had a baby with him, and filed for divorce after a year of marriage and simply said to him "You can find someone who will be a good step mom. I don't love you anymore, not in that way" and started dating a guy who earns a lot less money... so a metal friend was saying to me; I shouldn't put her down, but she married the guy because she knew he had a good job and made a lot of money, and then just went off to do her own thing and have her freedom. He and the stepmom have the kids most of the time.@@user-kh6ld5zn9t
For all men out there work hard save money and invest, travel abroad if you decide to marry one have a good lawyer to protect your interests.
Hint: a good lawyer will protect their own interests.
Even better - travel and stay in the country where you don't need a lawyer to protect your interests.
@@00_UU Where is that?
@@dingus6317 google is your friend. Any countries with strong laws that favor men
@@dingus6317 Bro is advising people to travel to the middle east apparently
Real talk. I’ve been a loner most of my life. At first it’s kinda hard, you’re an outsider, and people misunderstand and judge. But after a while, you own and embrace it. I don’t follow the crowd. I find solace in peace and quiet. Embrace your inner Sigma.
If anyone watching this needs a good friend I’m here for them ❤
This was a very fascinating story
I have 3 friends with late 20's sons and they are depressed!
I am a late 20s guy and am depressed too.
@@bookinsights1092Same, Mid 20’s
A lot of guys refuse to make a commitment, they have seen how their friends have been financially destroyed when the marriage breaks down. Most are unwilling to take that risk.
Both ways
Passport bro
Both sides get destroyed, not just the "poor man".
In fact, men in Canada, usually get more than 50% and the woman and their children get less than 50% for all of them.
Men complain but they often exaggerate.
Did you know child support for one child is only 10% of your income. 10%. Men complain like crazy but it's only 10% and they have no obligation to help pay for extra curricular activities, only daycare costs which are shared 50/50.
And in Canada both parents are entitled to maximum contact with their children.... So no, the men aren't denied access to their kids IF they want it, in which case they don't pay any child support.
That's it. Commitment Phobia. Then in turn "why am I lonely?" 👀😑
Loneliness is not only about partners and commitment - I believe the speaker talks about guys/men that do not even have deep, meaningful connections
I wonder if the young men who refused to talk to women unless they considered them attractive are in this group of lonely men, cause that would be freaking funny
Men's loneliness will stop when Men stop giving attention to women online and focus on just building wealth, health and better future . There will be a huge change if that happens.
Don't forget about our current unfair family laws during divorces. Our current unfair family laws don't value fatherhood in the family roles.
How are you supposed to build welath when most of you don't even know how to operate a washing machine?
@hereforthechaos7614 what world do you live in? Looks like you've been hurt too much.
@@hereforthechaos7614silly comment.
I do all my own housework and chores, I cook and I clean. I have my own home. I'm under 40...
But no women give me the time of day. Why? I certainly don't know. I'd be working on it if I did. I get left on read, calls unanswered, women ghosting me without any reason given to me, I guess I'm supposed to just know why?
After a while you have to just turn inward and work on your own life rather than waste it trying to find someone to share it with.
Building wealth doesn't build lasting relationships, are you blind?
Thx for covering this topic
A person who walks with God is never alone.❤
Oh, but he is!
He just doesn't know it. 🙂
@@robertvermeer5951 so then, i guess you figure you know. Hmm...but did you consider that maybe you are the one who doesn't know it?❤️ Because you do not know God.
@@barrycharlesbrebner I only believe in what can be empirically proven.
@@robertvermeer5951 Only the truth can be proven. Because there is no real evidence for what is not true. Examine your own statement that you just made..."I only believe in what can be empirically proven", is that true? If you are honest with yourself you will be able to admit that you have and you do believe things that have not been proven, empirically or otherwise. But if you are not honest then you will not be able to admit it. ❤️
@@barrycharlesbrebner I believe I've commented on another living person through a sophisticated machine that works by means of electricity. If that is somehow not empirically true and I am in fact delusional, then you likely don't exist either and I am just talking to myself here.
Well society has convinced us that masculinity is toxic, convinced women that they don't need men, destroying the family unit.. so yeah thats a recipe for loneliness for everyone.
It's actually mostly the men who are lonely and depressed when they're single and childess, while single and childless women are thriving. Gee, I really wonder why that is!
@@hereforthechaos7614sorry sis but women are suffering just as much. We are designed to live in packs. Truss me I know a ton of old single women that say they are happy alone but they’re just alone because they can’t shut their yap and men can’t handle them. They are bitter and lonely just as men are. The only difference is women support each other better. Men just hide because they are told never to express their feelings. WE ARE BOTH LOSING WAKE UP!!!
We talking about this for 6 years already. Its too late to beat the dead horse. This dudes are broken beyond redemption. Just let them enjoy their stuff ok ?
i am 28 living alone in canada from last 7 yeas nd i never have girlfriend i knw i have tried too much that maybe no one could have tried, but i still got countless rejections,,.i have faced serious depression cuz of lonelyiness twice...for last few months nd years i started teaching myself that i dont need a women or girlfriend partner to live my life anymore, its hard sometimes its feel like impossible but half of my life is gone only half left i think i might able to make it alone....
Never let rejections stop you.
I'm 52, never married but I do have 1 daughter...I need absolutely nobody except her. I'm happy to know people and say hello but I love being alone. I never want to get married. I don't even care if I have another girlfriend. I truly have found my peace within and I love it. Men really only need a few decent people in our lives. We're not psychologically wired like women so we are built to be loners which doesn't mean you stay in the basement and lock yourself away from the world. Say hello to random people, socialize at a coffee shop, or chit chat with a stranger in a lineup...you'll learn you're never really alone.
Join groups, classes and volunteer. If nothing else it will teach you to interact, which is something many young men have difficulty doing. And you may meet the right person, or you may meet someone knows the perfect person for you.
If someone invites you to a family event , go. Good chance they are trying to set you up with someone. If nothing else, more chance to broaden you skills.
Online dating is a disaster for both men and woman. Really unhealthy. And you can not just walk up to any young woman without her feeling stressed. Not your fault, but a reality for women. You are a danger.
Unfortunately formal introductions are long gone. They use to have chaperone dances, etc. It was a good system.
You are right you do not need a woman but I understand how not having a female companion may be difficult. I hope you find the right girl for you . Because no girl is better than the wrong girl. Some of these women are messed up in their thinking. All the best.
Life is too short to live where you feel unhappy and unfulfilled so my advice would be to move back to home country if you have good social community, support, ties and connection there, so that you are not as lonely, and if not home country then move to some other place where you feel you will be happy....28 is a young age...you have your whole life ahead of you....like many others you may have moved to Canada for a better financial growth prospect but money is not everything...what use is money without happiness...so be brave, take the risk of moving back home or to a place where you will be emotionally, mentally and spiritually happy....God bless you🙏🙏
all my male colleagues in Vancouver are single, they are 30-40y.o and seems never had any GF.
…nowadays, women are just highly selective w/ their own careers/money and don’t value success as much like back in the day. If you are an average joe…good luck.
@@silvertone1 with all due respect, dating has changed so much since your hayday. If you approach a girl in a bar: you're creepy. If you're not 6'+ and supremely handsome, you won't get dating app connections. Women have complete dominance over the dating market.
I'm not in Canada but I'm in the same age bracket, never had a girlfriend. It's become the norm for men on a more global scale.
I’m in that age bracket and from what I hear in Vancouver is that none of the guys really make efforts to date a girl long term. Same thing is happening here in Toronto. Everyone thinks grass is always greener with the next right swipe on a dating app 🤦♀️
Many women aren’t dating men for obvious reasons
I am a mother raising a teenage son and I am so glad that conversations like this are being had. It's important to be able to have these discussions.
It’s your fault
@@vegito8502 The segment clearly mentions a lack of good male role models in men's lives and you blame a hard working mother. Do you have any opinion on absent fathers ?
@@oliviamedeiros8882 not my fault you chose the wrong father(s) for your son.
@@vegito8502 you obviously missed half of the segment and I don't have a son...so your point is ???
@@oliviamedeiros8882 something around 90 percent of divorces are initiated by the ladies. So why are you asking guys about this?
Giving more than you get is quite different from being gaslit into thinking you deserve nothing.
I think men who feel lonely in Canada at times should travel. The world is a different place and if you are respectful of other people’s cultures, can get a spouse to marry.
young men with zero support or resources, this boomer says the answer is to give
your time is your most valuable resource, spend it wisely. do not give it to those that do not deserve it.
Took mainstream media only a decade to realise, that might be a record!
Be yourself, do nice things, help others, respect others and your self. Don’t be rude adjust you behaviour to the situation you are in. Keep close relationships at least with someone, mother father brother friend, cousin etc. Don’t listen to the bullsheets around you. Just do the good thing, will pay at the end.
This is great advice for all human beings. Well said!
Great advice...thank you...appreciate it...God bless you 🙏🙏
Terrible advice that doesn't actually work in real life
@@bettywhite2694 exactly
@@bettywhite2694 What would be your advice? Please do kindly share and thank you.
I wonder about this one too. My 3 brothers all died young from suicide (age 26) alcoholism (45) and a motorcycle accident (17) In my life it always felt like I had extreme responsibility and burden and I was mostly ignored any times I voiced my burden or pain and was referred to as whining. Nowadays I just became self sufficient in almost every way and I don't need or particularly care what society thinks or how it judges me. Also part of that process was to see how much the left leaning wing of politics has made a meal out of blaming men for so many things and how completely ridiculous they have become. I doubt that I'll ever go back to voting for the left and I'm happy to have seen the light.
I really don't think you'll find that right wing politicians will have any compassion or sympathy for you. That's not in their DNA.
im left wing here and the matrix and noam chomsky have mentioned isolation / atomization.
to me being left is about being critical of power and pro democracy which is the opposite of power.
i’m like others unfortunately, suffering from loneliness and the lost of sense in life. It’s what Albert Camus called the experience of the absurd i guess .. I had
many girlfriends since my teenage years, i’m in my 30’s now and it’s been many years i’m completely alone …. the last relationship i had destroyed every hopes i had … i thought it was the love of my life… i ended humiliated many times in front of my friends by her , she was flirting with anyone just to make me angry to show others how i was crazy , she blended all this toxic behaviours with hopes and good moments and i lost my soul . She was so charming that she stolen my social circle … everything fell apart , i’m just working and come back home to be alone . My energy is drained. I feel like an alienated, i have a good job , i play music too , i have a lot to say because im interested in a lot of subjects… but it’s like i’m invisible now and don’t know how to get a life with purpose now , it’s now friday and i’m in pain again … i just went to the grocery store and seen people together, friends , couples ..
Plz look into Religion/Spirituality. That might help u.
Read the unplugged alpha.
Purpose - volunteering for a cause you believe in
Friends - play a sport, and/or join a hobby group. Look for events happening in your area
When making friends, there's a higher chance you'll make a connection with a woman :)
I think theres an “everyone” lonlieness epidemic because no one leaves the house and srays off their devices long enough to connect with other humans.
Excellent and timely discourse. Men doesn't know how to be men anymore without embodying the toxic stereotypes. Men I admired growing up had the confidence and ability to standout, be kind and generous...they lift you up rather than put you down.
Unfortunately being a man is just toxic masculinity now.
Men approaching women in public, to demonstrate their interest is viewed as toxic masculinity. Any sort of assertiveness is viewed as toxic masculinity.
Men speaking up in a group/public space is viewed as male privilege and toxic masculinity.
If you have hobbies or interests that that you really enjoy then being single is one of the greatest gifts. I'm 51, single and have never been married. I'm alone but never get bored or feel lonely. The freedom to do what you want on your own schedule is very liberating. It's a shame most men haven't figured that out.
living a life without a woman is boring
@@rudeegruenberg9184 it’s all fun and games until she says she wants a divorce and snatches up half your assets.
Bingo
@@rudeegruenberg9184 it sure isn't
Drama chaos nagging grief aggravation financial struggles
😂
@rudeegruenberg9184 marriage is a scam in West
If this was a women's issue the press would be having a field day with it and politicians would be holding hands accross the country trying to solve it
Wow, CBC finally stumbled on the subject.
If men are afraid to speak about men's issues, Are they born that way or Is it due to their life experience and how they are treated?
I got bullied for telling my dad I have anxiety.
I was ridiculed for opening up about being in an abusive relationship some time ago. I got a mental disability because of that relationship
The typical response to a man speaking about mens issues is that women have it worse in some other way. Its an argumentative fallacy. But every time I have ever brought up mens issues or mens rights infront of women they labelled me a misogynist (which I quickly laughed at them for).
Its treated as a zero sum game where support for men means less support for women, therefore support for men is misogynist. Its gaslighting at a societal level and has been normalized through our education systems and news outlets.
Men aren't allowed to complain. They get shut down by being called "privileged" or deserving of the loneliness due to perceived injustices of the past they had no involvement in. There's no support for them and nobody has any interest in supporting them.
Due to the way we are treated.
We get shamed for being virgins, for taking about our feelings and for being vulnerable.
In my experience, fellow men were more empathetic than women.
I think this news segment was outstanding, addressed several core issues and in a straight forward fashion, not trying to appease the opposition. I hadn't heard of Richard Reeves before.
Important convo and I appreciate the nuance. Too often these topics are spoken in over generalized terms
Male Patterned Loneliness
One of my goals once i retire from active work now is to focus on counselling, psychological therapy and mental health support for Men only.
Please do so. There is very little psychological therapy/support for men in the area that I live in (western Ontario), and I imagine that it isn't much different for the rest of Canada.
Internet and Iphones. Notice how the issue of male loneliness coincided with these things? Especially the iPhone. It's not normal for us.
I been single for 7 years. I have no children and my whole fsmily passed away. I am not alone abd havent felt lonely ever since i came to Jesus. Amen.
Social media and scrolling for empty answers are temporary.
One thing a lot of men nowadays face is the absence of positive feedback from women despite doing selfimprovement to become attractive (putting time and effort in gymming, studying, career, apprearance in general). Men who dont get any positive feedback (or only negative feedback at best) give up at some point because no mattter how hard they work women just dont give a damn.
So these men either only start doing the bare minimum or dont do anything anymore and completely retreat and isolate themselves.
It is worrisome to be sure.
Why do they need compliments about their looks from women to survive? That seems odd to me. Maybe they should work on their hobbies and personality, which makes them more interesting.
You can't take a personal situation and apply it to the general population.
@@TheHamishX interesting and smart don't cut it on dating apps.
So, you're basically blaming women for not giving you compliments. Try doing things for yourself, not for women. If we dont know you, why would we cheer you on?
Suicide - well every time men decide to talk about it, women quickly jump in to stoop that discussion.
CBC allowing comments is a good idea. It’s called free speech? Love the comments from independent thinkers.
Any man with common sense knows how dangerous it is to be a male teacher. 15 years ago I was a school bus driver. Over the years I've had to break up fights on my bus many times. Pull over the bus, pull the bigger kid off the smaller kid, inform the school. But towards 2005 - 2010, I started to get fearful of breaking up fights, specially when it was girls fighting. Not because I feared for myself physically, but because it just takes one angry accusation to destroy a man.
Just the phrase, "girls fighting".. in the 80s, out of 100 odd fights, I don't think I ever saw a girl swing on another girl. I'm sure it happened, somewhere. I just never saw it. By the 90s, girl fights were somewhat common, maybe 1 in 10 fights I broke up were between girls. And in the 2000s, things started to go sideways.. girls punching out boys, and the boys afraid to defend themselves, they would just take the beating.
There are 1000s of jobs a man can do, in today's woke/metoo world, teaching isn't one of them. Which is a shame for the young boys, with so few male teachers, all of their youth is spent with female authority figures. I wonder what that does to the psyche.
Anyways, I'm old now, you guys figure it out.
It might be all the sexual predation from male authority figures -- at home, school, and church -- over centuries that has made society skeptical about men in those positions of power. In fact, I'm sure that's the reason.
💯💯✔✔
@@TT-fq7pl yes, the reason some men were doing wrong things and now all men are responsible. Would you like to discuss equality in law enforcement? Because ladies do not get life in prison, even for terrible crimes. Men are raised to be obedient beta NPCs only to learn later in life that it was all false and the ladies only pick badboys, those that are aggressive and disrespectful. So what is the point of being a man? And what is the point of being a good man only to be friend zoned all your life?
@@TT-fq7plyeah women can certainly neverrr be predators right? You should see the amount of female teachers messing with kids.
@@prophetofthe8th It's disgusting both ways, but statistically more common with men than with women.
What women want: male above 6', income above $100k, owns own home, full head of hair. Good luck with that, ladies. What men want: a loving partner. Good luck with that, gents!
This great CBC ! Thanks starting the value conversations. Don't forget about our current unfair family laws during divorces. Our current unfair family laws don't value fatherhood in the family roles.
This is arguably a general issue. Yes, I think its important that men get recognized but let be real there a general loneliness epidemic happening. He pointed out men under 30 - meanwhile those reports on late millennials and gen z include both genders displaying high levels of loneliness. Most of it is directly due economic circumstances. They cant afford to go out, they cant afford cars, they have no where to hangout in their living situations etc.
Not economics as much as the Digital Age.
Honestly i dont see a point in starting a new relationship. If you dont have a girl by now, its best to stay single. It'll save your life.
If you think a relationship with a woman is going to ruin your life, then maybe try therapy or a relationship with a man?
When has CBC ever highlighted or cared about men's issues? CBC is horribly biased.
Very good speaker, thank you for posting! Kinda surprised that CBC hit the nail on the head this time 😅
I would rather be alone than be with a woman that makes you feel lonely.
Same for women. There's nothing wrong with either. Pursue other kinds of relationships.
So glad men's health (mental, physical, sexual) is finally being given the seriousness it deserves. For millennia the concerns and lives of men have been sidelined in a disposable narrative when it comes to their value.
Millennia 😅????
Men have been sidelined for a millenia?
Ridiculous statement.
Lower socioeconomic people of both genders have been exploited in various ways by ruling classes for millenia. In the middle ages poor Serfs sent to the frontlines to get slaughtered as grunts/footsoldierd with minimal training and weaponry.
Nobody is more privileged and has more entitlement than white western women
Human history is not man vs woman, its poor men & women vs the men & women in charge. We are symbiotic creatures we live, thrive or struggle together.
Yes there is! Our society is a dumpster fire!
To be honest, we've done it to ourselves. We stay quiet when the extremes ruin everything for us.
The solution is to be strong and brave in your solitude and finding others who you can back up.
Or try something different.
Don't be silent, confide in others.
If the same old same old isn't working ... Try something different.
@@lizliz4186You should stop commenting. It’s clear you don’t have a clue as to what you are talking about
@@benjaminwiens7644 OP’s advice is solid. When you keep trying something and it doesn’t work out, you try something else. This is age old advice. Attacking op gets you know where, and you’re a prime example of how things get bad because you shut down valid ideas meant to fix issues while continuing to live in a world that’s getting even more messed up by the second.
The solution is to travel to countries where people have strong communities. It is an easy fix. Passport Bros are a fast-food solution to this, real solution is long term travel. Plenty of YT videos on this topic.
I've been practically living alone since I was 17 and totally alone since 26, I enjoy the silence and solitude, living with other people is exhausting.
We're not all Bonobos, though.@@silvertone1
Not if they're the RIGHT people, wink, wink!
Richard we need more people like you talking about this
Fantastic Segment, broken down very well by Richard
Why is this affecting men, and not women?
It is affecting women. The key difference is men are disproportionately hit much worse and it's not taken seriously compared to women's loneliness.
It is, but for men it is often the case that they will not put in the effort required to have meaningful relationships. And the deep relationships that they do forge can only be viewed as sexual or potential sexual partners in their mind.
At this point it feels self imposed and I truly don't know what would actually help. Men need to start breaking down the idea that hyper independence socially is healthy.
@@LoreEclectic yes many do. The problem is society treats women's issues as a societal issue and treats mens issues as an individual issue. We get told to just man up and deal with it ourselves. We gotta be independent Because we have to since we don't get support. We are just expected to provide in a relationship and we get nothing in return.
@@BloodBornShadowWalkerLies
I travel when i can, that's what keeps me sane. Go to Latin America or SEA where people are truly warm and welcoming. Social qualities that doesn't exist in this country.
People are truly warm and welcoming in Seattle? I had no idea. But it rains a lot there.
Any place that still has strong family/cultural beliefs tends to have fewer lonely people.
@@sid.kavalu Well, it's a bit more complicated than that, especially if you're a woman. Those places tend to be dominated by men and male-centric religions. Also, most forms of abuse occur within families and churches, so you're still going to find a great deal of loneliness and unhappiness. But a strong sense of community does indeed help in some sense.
Absolutely. Add Eastern Europe to your list. It is not as good as it used to be, but you still find real people in Eastern Europe.
go to those places and get mugged, pickpocketed, scammed, conned, kidnapped etc. better stay in the safety of your own home.
I'm alone ALL the time.
How are you doing?
@@maureenmellott5738 not good.
@@RoquetSynce I will be thinking of you. I hope that you can enjoy a lovely moment here and there throughout your day.
Hey man, I recommend getting a library card and trying to get involved in your community. Humans are social creatures and need interaction. Maybe pick up multiplayer video games if leaving the house isn't your thing. It's not good to be perpetually alone.
I remember a feminazi teacher taking away 28 minutes out of my 30 minute recess because I used 6 staples to hang up my project instead of 4. She probably wanted to take all 30 minutes but that was illegal. We have been bashed and treated as second class since elementary school!
Gynocentrism
No one wants to socialize anymore
What else do you think is propping up $100,000 pickup truck prices lol.
Better to live on the corner of a roof then live with a quarrelsome woman.
That sure is one hefty monthly car payment. I'll stick to my four door sedan.
Well spoken and articulated. I think his best comment was "we can have two trains of thought at once" ie. we can look out for the interests of women and men concurrently. A major basis of the neo-feminist movement is that you arent allowed to think that way. It's one dimensional and toxic. Neo-feminist ideologues have no place in the future world.
This is why we must work together to expose their corruption. This is why we must vote out the current Liberal government and then get the ball rolling on a defunding.
Neo-feminist? Feminists have never been about true equality or men's rights. That's why female genital mutilation was added to the Criminal Code in 1997 and yet male genital mutilation is still legal. And that's just one example.
What exact Feminist theories or texts are you referring to? Can you give a concrete example that supports your allegation? @@Arkhanno
@@Arkhanno 1st and 2nd generation feminists have been about women being equal to men in all aspects. 3rd wave feminism is where the idea of women being better than men started. It’s disingenuous for you to say what you said. As for circumcision that’s not a woman’s issue. That is religious and traditional, so speak to your fellow men about this, and don’t put this on women, but of course you won’t because it’s easier to blame women than it is to go against other men. That’s 🐈 behavior on your part.
Very well put
Men Go Their Own Way.
Yes. Also Passport Bros for all races.
Today's man can never be too careful.
Go your own way and stay lonely, bitter, angry and resentful your whole life.
Accept that the world is changing and men need to adapt. We need to support each other. We need to express emotions beyond anger. We need to care for each other and show boys and young men that masculinity is not pick-up trucks and beer and guns.
Don't limit yourself to stereotypes. If you're into those things, have at'er! But if you're seeking validation through inanimate objects that you've prescribed masculinity to you'll never fill that void.
@@stratford374 "Don't limit yourself to stereotypes."
You might want to apply your own advice to your OWN hypocrisy!:
'We need to care for each other and show boys and young men that masculinity is not pick-up trucks and beer and guns.'
Your rant does absolutely nothing to re-balance the over-feminized divorce laws.
@@FischerFan Umm... what? Don't limit yourself to stereotypes, masculinity is not pick-up trucks, beer and guns. That's a cohesive point.
I'm a man, comfortable with my own masculinity. I like beer. Not so much trucks and guns. There's not wrong with liking those things. But.. there is a toxic culture that pushes them as if that's what makes you a man, which it doesn't. And I've met SO many fragile men who buy huge trucks because they think it makes them manly when they're clearing overcompensating for their insecurity.
Over-feminized divorce laws? Care to expand on that point? Any specifics or just vague notions that upset you?
It’s a narcissistic culture within our society
Soyciety
Its not go back to the way things were . Its about moving forward after a regretion .
No male loneliness exists, the market and economy is doing fine, and there is no war in ba sing se
Bait
The problem is, while we no longer live in "patriarchal society", we as a man still require to be "providers". In modern economy there can not be one provider. Both sexes need to work, and often it's woman who earns more, and men (and many women) wrongly think that it's emasculate them.
Learn to love and appreciate yourself.
Remember when they used to be the “no fear” slogan? Those stickers were everywhere when I was in my 20s.
Let us be honest. There is a lot of negativity aimed at "maleness". Further the only role I see women wanting men to keep is provider. Society is very materialistic and status based. There is no longer a nuclear family that has been replaced by divorce courts.
This individual raised some valid points but failed to acknowledge that many boys grow up in households without a father. Children need a positive male role model. An active / participating father who can provide guidance, support, and correct teachings. While the reasons for the absence of a father may vary, it is beneficial for society as a whole if families stay together and fathers take an active role in their children's upbringing. There are too many broken homes with single mothers. Unfortunately, our society seems to have its priorities backward, and we are seeing the impact of these issues in many areas.
Having a father in your life doesn't guarantee that they will offer guidance, support and teachings.
@@yxeaviationphotog Indeed. What they offer could be a whole hell of a lot worse than their absence.
@@TT-fq7pl I can confirm this. It’s not enough to have parents. Children need good parents who are mature and dedicated to raising them together.
Yes definitely a complex aspect of a complex problem. The family unit is not represented in modern art nor many influencers. It's a tuffy though as I think people associate the patriarchy with a family unit... The patriarchy is over totalized in my opinion as well and it effects the imagination - which drives us....in this case particularly regarding womens choices of who they want to be,etc. there is a very toxic aspect of feminist culture that trashes and smashes the "patriarch" but the most Robespierrian can't even show what they are pointing at! There is a there there... But its not thee totality!
All of historical decision making isn't simply men conspiring against women 😂 .... Anyway boys.... We gotta regroup, I'm calling a meeting. Men or mice! 🎉
an important discussion