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The best way to avoid her pulling away is you pulling away first: be indiferent, give mixed signals, dont be too available. She will think twice before pullin away from u
@@SkillofAttraction not if the man is consistent with his indifference. Then she has no choice but to always chase. And we men can’t care about how they feel about it…
@@SkillofAttraction That’s the mistake men make;falling in love. FUCK THAT! If the woman leaves because of a man’s indifference,fuck her. This advice is for men who make the mistake of falling in love…
I stayed in frame the whole relationship and never chased. At one point in the relationship she started to pull away and I made the mistake of chasing her. Spelled the beginning of the end of our relationship
Yes, that can happen rather easily...it's happened to me before. It's really difficult to get your frame back once you've lost it. When a woman finds a weakness, she'll exploit it. On the positive side, it shows you where you need some work.
I agree with you that getting help from any other women on why she is pulling away will make things even more worst because they can’t understand these concepts.
i been listening to a lot of these and i really like the way you explain- there are too many overly macho fools out there giving advice - you make sense you are organized and do not waste words
F*ck that, if they are pulling away and playing games, walk away and block them on social media and everything else, dont see them again, believe me it'll only get worse, they'll just keep pushing you away because they know you'll come back
That's an emotional reaction & feminine energy. And YOU don't come back when she pulls away, SHE does if you handle it correctly. She'll be chasing you.
@@SkillofAttraction No when they are being nasty and abusive, like when she says to me during a disagreement get the f*ck outta my house, I don't even want you here, it's happened several times before, ive walked away, ghosted her and blocked her, that's not feminine energy at all
I love this guy's videos. I've been watching since just before the Pandemic started. Just very genuine advice. Not like a lot of others, you can consume Eric's content without fueling hate towards women. Expect women to pull away. Sometimes see it as a positive, because it means you can have a break from talking to her.
Erick I know that women only care about how they feel . But is funny when you as a men do the same , they can’t handle it. I had pull from some women in the past and they chase me harder , asking me if everything is okay and stuff like that 😂😂
Yes, I am guilty of this. Eric you are on point & I am kicking & blaming myself for this. I was too available & over pursuing & that was a clear mistake. However I showed my indifference there after, the last time I saw her & just tried to share some good news to her? She responded to me in a very disrespectful way in being sarcastic & as a result, I took a self esteem hit as I really felt it & got fuming mad as this was definitely uncalled for. After the incident, I saw another side of herself & therefore I took action in by taking my power back as I created my own distance. On another occasion, I happen to run into her as she was sitting down in a room & at the same time I happen to run into a separate friend. While I was conversing with my separate friend who happened to be on my left, this sarcastic woman who happens to be on my right then turns to look at me & my presence for 2 to 3 seconds while I'm talking to someone else & then after that she turns her body & torso away from giving me her back & the cold shoulder as this was clearly spotted as I saw this from the corner of my eye. When I was finished conversing, I did not even bother approaching her as I kept my distance. I have enough self respect at this point. One day as I was just going about my day, I happen to see her yet again as we were walking in opposite directions & at this point I was clearly done with her as when she tries to get my attention by saying HEY!! As we got closer coming from opposite directions, I did in fact walked right past her acting as if she did not even exist as I kept on going without even turning around as I dropped her like a bad habit as I definitely had pulled away permanently. This woman is not who I thought she was as I need to take the time in getting to know someone before proceeding any further. This is her being clearly manipulative & showing me a clear straight disrespect in which I have no tolerance for by her clear bad body language. She sure has the nerve to treat me as I was not there so I returned the favor. There were no signs of effort, love, affection & or reciprocation as I was doing all the work but then stopped & moved on as I was exhausted. The only thing I did was ignore her after her disrespectful sarcasm.
Sounds like you did the right thing; however, keep in mind that women's tests can often seem like disrespect...there's a thin line between disrespect & women's tests.
I feel like I’ve broken all of these rules for the break up. (Early on still) it’s only been about a week or so. But have I blown my chances? Because I’m doing no contact.
You can certainly recover & increase your chances if you start handling the situation right. I have a playlist of videos about breaking-up that may help: ua-cam.com/play/PL7GMy6_VPa3IdXy7pO4lC05ptCNVF6gg0.html But many of my videos will get you on the right path. Also, you can ask questions on my site (it's free) & get feedback from me & others: SOA.FM
great video. made all these mistakes. emotional in bad place because I was dealing with a bad accident at the same time. which even had her leaving me during that
Unfortunately women turn cold as ice when they lose attraction & respect for a man. A good woman will stick with you when you've fallen on hard times, but only as long as she's emotionally attached & you're working to change your situation.
@@SkillofAttraction thanks. oddly bad accident after getting back together and oddly on her roof to patch a small leak and then fell from ladder for bad broken tibia bone and long heal/compartment syndrome. One can only heal so fast. then staff infection. left in a very cold manner after awesome 3 years and 3 months prior a great 2 week trip.
I've been struggling with an alcohol addiction for months...my girlfriend knows about it. We live about an hour apart. She's literally driven down here to pick me up off my bedroom floor when I thought I was gonna O.D. That was 2 months ago...she loves me more than she did than. If you can't be open, honest, and vulnerable with your girl...she ain't the girl. She's my ride or die. I would do the same thing for her over and over
That's a completely different scenario. And I'd be very careful being too vulnerable with women...it can easily backfire on you. ua-cam.com/video/YYVGgWnUTzY/v-deo.html
Coach is it wrong to date another girl when your girl pulls away? This happened after she was feeling insecure about us because she is a healthcare worker and her schedule is a mess. She was constantly worried that she is not meeting my expectations and I reassured her. Immediately after she pulled away. Obviously, after getting the same treatment from my exgfs, Like PTSD I pulled back and began to look for other women and even have a "date" arranged this night. A part of me feels this is wrong but I'm so done with being taken advantage of with these women. Do you think this is wrong? Am I being too hasty?
Not necessarily. If she's a committed girlfriend (the relationship has been made "official" by both of you), then I would say it's wrong, because if you're both committed you have to learn to work through your issues. More importantly, men have to learn to build their tolerance to women's erratic emotions. However, if it's not yet official, then you owe her nothing. In fact, in that case, you SHOULD be dating other women until she locks you down.
Thank you for the video. Thankfully I didn't make too many mistakes, except for confessing my feelings to her. 😕 I immediately felt that I shouldn't have done that. Now I know the lesson was learned, even though all my friends are trying to be logical so they all say things like «WHY do you regret saying that, WHY do you think you shouldn't be open about your feelings with someone you're close with??? Not fair». As if it was supposed to be fair... Sigh. I'm still confused though. My partner pulled back and asked me to give her 2-3 weeks of time and space. She didn't mean no texting - just not seeing each other - but I didn't text her anything for more than 3 weeks. She reached out once, I responded, but that was all. I would still like some of her posts though because I didn't plan to *ignore* her. Besides, she might be Fearful Avoidant, I've read a lot about this attachment style and know that it's the most complicated - you can't be needy, but they should feel safe with you so making them feel abandoned isn't a good idea. So I'm now absolutely confused. I texted her a few days ago, she seemed to be happy but I didn't know what else to say so I said something basic, like I'm glad you're doing well, and the conversation faded away. She didn't respond. And it wasn't just because of her, but also because I suddenly had nothing to say and no energy left (texted her and then found out that I'm fired, I was instantly ruined and couldn't think of our conversation anymore). And now I don't understand how I should contact her. Should I wait for her to text me first? She can feel abandoned and lose her trust for me; she's traumatized and her trust is imperative to me. I feel like I've already made a mistake when I went No Contact because I promised her to always be there for her. I didn't ignore her though, just didn't text first. Or should I text her every once in a while, calmly, without too much emotion/request? To ask her how she's doing and tell something about my own life. Not too much, so there's some mystery left. How would you guys rate my current plan? I'm planning to fix my life situation just a bit because losing my job hurt my self-esteem even more. Tomorrow I'm going to work to a new place for the first time. I also try to keep myself busy and entertained by learning new skills and trying the things I've always wanted to try. And work on my mental health. I'm hoping to achieve some quick progress within the next few days, which I think is likely to happen, and then I'm going to text her again. Just to check. And then later ask her out, but it depends on how well the communication goes.
A few days ago, We fell out then she proceeded to pack her things and leave (something I have always spoken against). On her way out, I did not persuade her to stay. I simply told her to drop my house keys.
I will say you hit the nail on the head with her pulling away due to stress is outside of the relationship! She’s finally building her dream home, but she just got hit with $11,000 bill out of the blue that she wasn’t expecting so it’s stressing her out and it’s making her shut down to me!
That happens sometimes, unfortunately. Women act on their current emotional state. It's best to ask her if she wants to talk about it. if she doesn't, then it's best to give her space.
@@SkillofAttraction we talked about it briefly, and I gave her some opinions that she didn’t agree with so she said that I was stressing her out! We talked briefly a few hours ago. She said that she was having dinner with her roommate that was five hours ago and she hasn’t texted me but she’s been online so that’s not normal for her! We usually text all the time because we’re in a long distance relationship, but I know if she wanted to talk she would text me , when she text me, I’m gonna mirror her time and be a couple hours before I respond! Right now she’s thinking that she can start the conversation anytime she wants and I know that’s not good, I got to get her to start thinking about what am I doing? Why isn’t he responding to me?
@@Joe-j1f In most cases, when women want to talk about it, what they really mean is they want to vent & you just listen. They're not really looking for solutions. So always ask, "do you want my opinion/advice?" Now, just give her space & once she begins to miss you she'll reach out.
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I immediately went no contact once I saw it’s been 5 days and no response to my text messages 🤦🏽 I’ll just carry on with life til you come to your senses
@@SkillofAttraction does it work for a crush? I see where you talk about it used on a ex but this girl was a crush who out of nowhere stop responding and left me on read
@@pappymcallister2492 It can work on a crush. It really depends how much she values you or what you provide her with. But regardless of that, NC is really for you so you can heal & move on...it's just a nice byproduct that sometimes it causes her to miss you & realize life isn't so great without you.
Great video...and will follow...in my current situation:If you been a simp and disrespected...need to pull out your own heart out,work on yourself,worry about yourself and put her second or third...it doesnt matter wat she thinks...she will notice and question herself...just dont take your foot off the gas...be a gentleman always..but just dont give a fk..
What if she is constantly acting hot and cold, but always seems to come back only to go cold again. It’s like 2 steps forward 1 step back every single TIME😩
When a woman is behaving hot/cold, it's typically a sign that she's feeling uncertainty about you. Sometimes that uncertainty is a result of inconsistency from you. Tightening up your frame can help with this. As an example, when she's being "hot" with you, then reward her with our time & attention...but when she's being "cold", withdraw your time & attention until she begins warming up again. If she cares enough, this should give her the idea on how you expect to be treated.
One important take away from this video..."women act on their current emotional state". What often seems like games is simply her experiencing erratic emotions & responding accordingly. This doesn't mean that you have to tolerate it, but it's important to learn to accept innate female behavior, because you can't change it.
really like this one, makes me think of my current situation, but I think i had less probs with the one girl that really loved me, but i suppose she was a bit submissive to me, with the other girls this is more relevant
I have a few videos about women pulling away... a very common issue men deal with. ua-cam.com/video/E-67XwQqEBA/v-deo.html ua-cam.com/video/gNmyxgptC3g/v-deo.html ua-cam.com/video/2N99w3Vu6jQ/v-deo.html ua-cam.com/video/X7CuCz6LsCc/v-deo.html
Wife deployed for a year. Ghosted me at month 9 for weeks got in shape, changed her grooming routines…then I questioned if she’d been faithful said yes…2 days later went through the phone and found out. She said “it was one time” not remorseful and it’s my fault and she wants to leave or “separate” basically to kind of keep me around to watch the 3 kids while she has weekends to continue screwing around. Starting to think I should just leave her. Been chasing her too, I’m about to cut that out.
Thank you,a this is a great video, I've been watching on repeat during the this pull away phase of my 10 mo th relationship. For context, my cat recently gave birth to kittens, this was something she'd been excited about happening for a while, but she started to pull away a week prior, when they gave birth I sent her some photos she seemed excited about it. Sadly one the babies passed away, I told her I was sad about it after she asked me how I was, I then asked her how she was and if she was okay...and she hasn't responded since. I'm curious to know why she's done this, but its why I've been watching g this video on repeat ever since to stop me from doing anything stupid. Sorry for the long post, but have you got any thoughts on this? Thanks again!
We started really clashing!!! She says she needs space to focus on herself and to take care of hers. I said ok then I texted her and I asked if she wanted to end our relationship she never replied. But a friend of mine told me she put on Facebook “I rather be told I don’t see a future rather then have my time wasted.” So what does she means, like what does wants from me? I need she said she wants space and I’m respecting it.
It means that her attraction levels for you is very low at the moment, & most likely she feels smothered by you. So, what you want to do is give her 100% space...no initiating contact, no secret message on social media to her, no viewing her stories or interacting with her posts, no asking her where you stand, or anything similar. Let her come to you. And your friend is wrong, btw..be careful getting advice from friends. After she's had a little space & she begins to miss you, then you'll most likely hear from her. At that point, greet her with an upbeat & playful attitude, & after a little back & forth banter, tell her that you want to see her & ask her when she's free to gt together. In he meantime, focus on yourself & becoming a better man. Also, for future reference, please see my pinned comment.
@@SkillofAttraction Thank you so much!!! I actually love her very much and I want to marry her. I’ve made my mistakes in the past and I sometimes feel she hasn’t forgave me. But I really love her and I actually wanna marry her. I love her so much and I wanna do right by her. What you’ve said has made me feel a lot better about things and I appreciate you for taking the time to reply because you didn’t have to though you did. It’s been 2 weeks so I guess I’ll just continue waiting until she reaches out to me. No calls or texts and thanks again!!!
@@SkillofAttraction Here’s an update. I had a talk with her Aunt because she contacted me. She told me that my girl told her EVERYTHING. She told me where I went wrong at and she also told my girl where she went wrong at also. I told her I was respecting her space so I gave it to her. She says she think I should go see her. I said don’t just wanna pop up knowing we are at this delicate stage now and she snaps on me you know. She says I don’t think she’s going to snap on you She thinks she going to wanna talk to me and she thinks I should go see her. I know they are close like mother and daughter close. So, what do think of this?
@@dojuanbrown6665 Hmm, tough call. Normally I'd say absolutely do NOT show up unannounced...that's stalker type stuff & it scares women. However, if her aunt knows all the details & she talked to your girl about all this, then she may be onto something. It's still a risk though...a risk that she may get angry. But if her aunt is insistent about it, then perhaps she knows something we don't. So, go for it!
If you have at least 4 to 5 women the one you like most put her in the back. While you're busy with the others. They will reach out. Never reach out to the main one. She will treat you like the King. Because you aren't focused on her
Yes, mostly...but if you want to keep her you have to be sure that you do make time for her. What you mentioned will absolutely work, but not long term. Generally, keeping a majority of your focus on yourself & building value, & not getting attached to outcomes will have a similar effect long term. But also be sure to continue dating & courting her.
I did mistake chasing and apologize to her when she pull away and she started play mind games until discover this relationship advice now I'm Alpha man she pull away and come back herself apologizing.
Hey coach, so I wanted your thoughts... Got into a scruffle with my girlfriend about late last month about how I felt she wasn't putting in effort, she was being cold in her replies to my text and skipping alot of them and the rest of that bull crap... Long story short... Told her I wasn't happy with it.. She said she'd change and put in more effort.. I agreed and everything was alright for about 2 weeks... But noticed yesterday she started selectively replying to my messages again... She did it again this morning and also yesterday was my dad's birthday... She saw my post about and didn't even bother saying anything... Personally my gut isn't too comfortable with the whole thing... Almost like she doesn't really care and she's trying to make me feel good... Not that she really cares... Her birthday is network but part of me kinda wants to just break up.. Especially since she's broken a boundary i put up of not appreciating selective replies... What do you think?
Are you seriously mad because she didn't respond to a social media post about your dad's birthday? Sounds like you need to pull the plug, man up and walk away. Then you can see how she responds. If she doesn't respond...oh well. Your nuts big enough for that? Have you even hit it yet? Boy I hope so the way you are behaving (it would be slightly less pathetic). You should never ask a woman to put 'relationship effort' in...that makes you look weak and needy, btw.
Well, of course boundaries are important, but if I'm going to be completely honest I feel like this is leaning towards micro-managing how she responds to you. It's one thing if her overall investment in you is lacking, but you can't be in control of how she interacts with you. However, if you're unhappy with how she responds, then it's better to mirror her until she becomes more invested. If you keep bringing this up she's going to see it as whining. Remember, women follow their emotions. So, she's either testing you to see if this gets under your skin, or her attraction levels are just on the low side at this point. I recommend that you just mirror her, because this way if it's a test, you pass it...you show her you're unaffected by this & she'll eventually stop because she doesn't get a reaction or the attention she wants. If her attraction is just low, then mirroring her will get it back up. You also avoid unnecessary conflict/drama this way. Now, if her investment is down across the board, then that's a little different. Is she making herself available for dates, is she affectionate, is she sleeping with you, is she doing most of the pursuing overall?
@@SkillofAttraction well... You may have a point but that's just the thing... Her overall investment just seems lacking,which was the main basis of our scuffle the last time... That she wasn't showing proper investment and effort and it wasn't doing it for me... She told me how she knew she wasn't doing her best and she blamed it on the fact that she was going through a mid life crisis and how she feels useless because I pretty much always do everything for her and she does nothing for me.... Long story short she promises to put in more effort and be involved I.e...being more responsive to how she replies my messages and all that and not just being cold... And she's been doing just that until yesterday where she was being all selective again and as far as being affectionate... Well... No.. She hasn't really... Last time we had a date was in April.. Heck last time we saw eachother was April... I didn't bother setting up meet ups cause her over all attitude wasn't really encouraging... Short replies... General coldness and uninterest... That's what led go me talking to her and telling her I'm not gonna take it anymore... I haven't been chasing as such ever since my talk with her or set any dates because I want to at least show that interest and enthusiasm but of recent we haven't even been talking much cause she says the power in her side is out so she doesn't get to charge her phone.. But the thing is... She still comes online... Her phone is still on... Just on Sunday she called me to send her money for data.... Today she messaged me to send her mum cash for transport... She even mentioned how we haven't talked in a while cause of her power outage thing and I told her yeah.. I was expecting her to apologize or layout a compromise but she literally ignores my response and other messages and just responds to something else... It just feels like she doesn't really care about us talking... She just does the bare minimum to keep me satisfied...
@@bryanwolf5468 That's something to pay attention to...if she's saying that you do everything for her, then this is a big reason why she's not. She doesn't have to, because she knows you will carry her weight. Also, she may be getting bored if you're not setting up dates. I understand that you may not want to because of her lousy attitude, but you still have to take the lead. Sometimes you just have to swallow your proud & take some action, because it's not really in a woman's DNA to take control of the situation. There's a good chance that she's just reflecting you, that she doesn't feel the need to take any action, because you don't seem into it. Also, you want to keep in mind that if you haven't been physically intimate for a while, she's going to naturally grow a bit distant. Sex is the glue for a relationship, despite what society says. So, what I'd do here is arrange a date. Focus on having fun on that date & leading her into the bedroom. After that, then gently back-off & let her invest a bit before you arrange another date.
@@bryanwolf5468 Bryan, you are texting too much, I bet. Plus, she likely feels you are acting feminine. Send texts when you NEED to. Time for you to pull back and maybe go on a break to restore polarity.
Hi I am always texting and calling her first, I always ask if I can come round and she always says not today. She initially would text me first sometimes, but she's not chasing me? Shall I pull back?
With those conditions, it doesn't look good, unfortunately. Only being together for a month doesn't give her long enough to become emotionally attached to you. At this point it's still on you to keep the momentum going. What you should've done here is after not hearing from her for a week, reach out to her & arrange a date.
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Even if your in a committed relationship,if she’s actin bitchy for no reason and pulls away, then seek other women.She doesn’t care about commitment when she pulls away,so why should we men care either? That IS mirroring her actions,because we don’t know what she’s doing during her pull away nor will she know what we are doing. AND YES,IT’S A GAME, and they started it….
You clearly didn't watch the video. You're wrong with everything you said here. And just an FYI...when a woman is acting bitchy it's typically because the man is behaving weak.
Hey man! So I went on a couple dates with this girl. She isn’t my girlfriend. Everything seemed to be going fine. She didn’t show any signs of not being interested. As she was touching me, getting close to me, kissing me. Things changed once we said our good byes. She texted me saying she wanted a guy to “go the extra mile” meaning care for her, appreciate and be there for her. She said I didn’t tell her she looked pretty on our date. Which she got her nails done so I said they looked pretty. I liked them! She said I didn’t tell her thank you for lunch which again I did and she said you’re welcome. The only issue I feel she would have is when I said text me later. I honestly thought she was gonna text me when she got home but she got mad I didn’t make sure she got home safely. My question is why do girls say you didn’t do something when you actually did? Are they trying to create drama or is this a test? I don’t think I handled it well when I thought I was standing up for myself and explaining that I did all those things she said I didn’t, she didn’t want to hear it. How would you handle this? Thanks so much for your help!
This sounds like a controlling, manipulative woman, who needs things to unfold exactly as she has envisioned...& if it doesn't unfold like that, she makes you feel guilty as a way to get you to chase & do as she wants. She's not following her heart...in her heart she clearly likes you or she wouldn't have been touching, kissing, etc. But, her head has a different agenda. She THINKS something like what she wants will make her happy...& it may make her happy initially, but in the long term it will drive her away, & she doesn't realize this. Always remember, don't give women what they want, give them what they need....they often don't understand what has an effect on them emotionally & they often don't know what they truly want. She THINKS she wants a beta male who worships her. Girls like that at first, but it gets tiring really quick & tuns her off. You typically don't want to go into defense mode in situations like this. Men have a terrible habit of over-explaining themselves to women. This just sends women the signal that he doesn't believe in himself, whether that's reality or not. However, there's really nothing more that you could've said here...her mind was made up by the time she contacted you. If I were in your shoes I just wouldn't reach out to her anymore. If she's doing this after the first couple of dates, just imagine how much worse it will be after she gets comfortable with you. She'll criticize everything you do. I think you dodged a bullet here.
I just got hit with this out the blue this week, and got accused of cheating. I think its from a death (patient)of someone close. Im just keeping cool and giving her time to gather her thoughts. She's been a little different since. Im Getting some of my other business done in the meantime. Work promotion and house sale in play. It's confusing but it is what it is. Time to go to the shooting range and have some fun!
When my last ex started pulling away , I smirked and told her " I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOU WHETHER YOU ARE DEAD OR ALIVE". Today she asks others where am I and what I am doing, she gives daggers to girls who talk to me.
I'm glad that worked for you, but you typically don't have to be that drastic. It's not so much that you shouldn't or don't care, it's more about being indifferent to the outcome because your confidence in yourself tells you that you'll meet another girl or equal or better quality.
In the words of the great Mother Teresa she said " The greatest disease is feeling unloved, unwanted and not being cared for". With that being said the reality is that she enjoys and gains sadistic pleasure in ghosting you , ignoring you as if you dont exist. Listen she wants your money nothing more to comprehend. Become a millionaire/billionaire and very soon they will know your Whatsapp number and run after you even if you are married. So she deserves to be told " I DONT CARE ABOUT YOU WHETHER YOU ARE DEAD OR ALIVE". Soon after that I advise all guys not to look at her, not a stare at her. It will give her lots of depresdion inside and she will chase you , because she enjoys guys giving her attention and validation. Have nothing to do with her. Guys please run after money because money smells better than girls.
All women play hard to get and enjoy you texting and calling her. You know we have to teach them that they have to earn us now. Because if you run after them they will tell their friends and other men who are not afraid to lose them that " I see this guy only as a friend , but he is persisting with me to be his girlfriend when I clearly stated I am not interested". I guarantee you that tomorrow if you win a billion dollar lottery she will run after you . But if you chase her she will treat you like a homeless person.
Eric yesterday the girl I was telling you about texting me and was saying that I need to respect her because she was with her boyfriend but then she said that she don't care if I text her rather than calling her and then she told me that she was worried about me because she thought that I blocked her Eric what should I do about the situation?
It sounds like she's interested, but unless she's making some sort of effort to see you or spend time with you, you're wasting your time. She may just be interested in the attention from you that she's not getting from her boyfriend. A girl who is truly interested will be making time for you. She's in a relationship, but in my opinion, if she's not married then she's fair game. But you also don't want to waste your time when there are single beautiful women out there.
coach can you help.i founded my girl being disrespectful,she cant answer for 5,6 hours on a question "are you free tonight" while she is online whole time.and lying she didnt see text. i told her if you gonna be desprespectful i m out,told her if she wants to talk ,just text me.otherwise good bye. after 5 days.she twxted me if i wanna talk,i told her yes but tomorrow.next day she rearranged for some other day.i told her,ok,text me if you want. 2 weeks later,she didnt text me yet.should i just let it go?
She was testing you to see if you got emotional over her lack of response. She absolutely saw your message & purposely didn't respond. When something like this happens, then you become distant until she begins investing in you again. It's a blurry line between tests & disrespect sometimes, so it's not always easy to know the difference. I wouldn't call what she did disrespectful. Rude? Yes! But it was a test. Then she tested you again when you made plans to talk . She may be testing you again, but 2 weeks without a response is a long time. So, I recommend that you just move on. If she truly wants you she will not let you go... at least not permanently. In other words, if she cares & loves you, she will reach out at some point. However, you can't put your life on hold for a maybe. Don't wait for her. Let her come find you when/if she's ready. And if she does come after you, she will have a new respect & attraction for you, because you've been strong & confident by not chasing her.
@@SkillofAttraction it is not about her strictly.its just about did i make mistake when she contacted me after week by saying ok,call me if you want. im trying to be best version of myself.so i wanna know.thnx coach 🙏
@@SkillofAttraction i just watched your video,and you sad there is situation like showdown in my case right now🤔🤔.she reached me to talk about problem,and then rearanged.but when i dont see her story,he gives me back equal. i feel that we are in showdown situation.but im gonna let her pull the trigger first?🤔 thnx coach,your word beeing very helpfull
@@vitorbelfort2422 I wouldn't say it was a mistake, but I wouldn't have said "if you want", because that communicates uncertainty about yourself. Instead, it would have been better if you said, "call me when you want to get together".
@@SkillofAttraction tbh it was like this "text me,when you feel we need to talk" i didnt realize that small words making such a big impact.😢 i know now that every word have meaning. i guess details matter🙏
Nothing changes. It's important to understand that women will act on their current emotional state, which is always in flux, whether you did anything wrong or not.
Hi Coach Erick tnx for the videos they help us a lot. There is a girl that I ask a date and she always tells me I will let u know when I’m free she been telling me tht for 3 months but she always calls me when she needs right but the others time she don’t call me she alone text’call me when she needs something what should I do.
If she's been telling you this for 3 months & only contacts when she needs something, then she's stringing you along. You're providing something that she's not getting elsewhere; however, it sounds like you're providing it too easily for her. In other words, she doesn't have to work for it. So, what i recommend is you ask her one more time. If she gives you a similar response, then you have two choices: either begin to distance yourself & only give her minimal of your time unless she tells you when she's available for a date, or cut her off completely. And if she asks you for anything, tell her no. You don't have to be that blunt in telling her no, but you must stop giving to her for free, because she's seemingly just using you. Watch this video: ua-cam.com/video/KDt7GVMoY7k/v-deo.html Also, this one: ua-cam.com/video/4C0OlI9Lrh0/v-deo.html
Hi friend l got my broken relationship fixed with the help of this great spiritualist who brought my partner Back in 48hours after many years of separation.❤️❤️
That's great man! I'm glad to hear it! I envy those of you who have learned this stuff while you were young. If you only knew how many comments I get saying "I wish I would've known this when I was in my 20s"...including myself.
Hi friend l got my broken relationship fixed with the help of this great spiritualist who brought my partner Back in 48hours after many years of separation.❤️❤️
I am texting with a girl which lives far away from me. We had very fun conversations. She told me she like guys who r totally into her. Does this means she likes guys chasing her. I didn't text her for few days. When I started now she is not replying while uploading stories. what should I do ?
@@guru_bro no never chase a girl . What a girl says she wants and what she actually wants are two completely different things. She’s testing you to see how compliant you are . Be yourself and text her like you have where you’re not always blowing up her phone . You will stand out by doing that and not bowing down to her. Wait to see if she messages you back … and if she doesn’t , she was just using you . If she really had high interest she wouldn’t just completely ignore you
No. Any girl likes to be chased n& of course she's going to tell you that, but only for a time before she begins to feel smothers, & then...she pulls away, or worse...she puts you in the friend zone. Women love attention, but if you want her to value you, you must be sure that she earns it while you still take the lead. If you haven't seen my video on chasing, this will help you understand: ua-cam.com/video/wtozMa5qafM/v-deo.html
My girlfriend is pulling away because shes greiving, what should i do. Do i need to initiate contact to her sometimes or just wait for her to always initiate contact. Im confused, please help, thanks
That's a little different than what I'm talking about here. Just remember, women act on their current emotional state, which is always in flux. Right now, emotionally, whatever she's grieving is taking priority. So, give her space, don' pressure her or get needy, & check in on her occasionally. If/when she seems like she's in a good/better mood, that's a good time to arrange a date or get together. For future reference, please see the pinned comment.
I have a problem. Me and my girlfriend are in ldr relationship. I have accuse her of cheating but she is not. Because of that she is really angry with me and upset because I'm not trusting her. What is the best way for me to fix this issue?
Because of that she is not communicating with as like before. She texting me one word reply and after that she won't talk to me again for hours. She doesn't want to answer me and I calling her. And it has been 2 weeks when this happen. Any advice please
This is one of those rare occasions where you want to apologize if you haven't already. And in the future, you never want to directly accuse a girl of cheating unless you know for sure & have proof. If you just suspect it, then start asking questions without blatantly accusing her. Part of the reasons she's being so cold is because she's turned off, because this shows insecurity & demonstrates a lower status. You don't want to continue demonstrating a lower status by chasing her. So, if you haven't apologized, then do that...then let her come to you. In other words, stop initiating contact when she's giving you almost nothing in return. Give her space & let her reach out to you. This will demonstrate confidence & a higher value. When she does reach out, greet her with an upbeat, care-free attitude...don't bring up this situation anymore. If she's receptive & she's giving you a good attitude in return, then arrange a virtual date (ie: skype, zoom, FaceTime, etc). Also, for future reference, please see my pinned comment.
Hi can someone help me, i have dated an engged woman, and we are dating for 8 months, We had sex 2x, and suddenly acts cold, when a try to have a sweet moments or hold her hand she avoids it, we also habe nicknames i call her mommy & she call me daddy but, she suddenly stops calling me that 1 month a go, i always tried to ask her in a private place but always says she dont like it, 2 weeks ago we have a date & she really enjoy it, she was so happy! and again suddenly keeps on blocking & unblocking me, specialy when she gets angry or try to be sweet, after 25 days she will leave soon for good , do you think she has a feelings for me?there are a few months that it feels like we are inlove together but now, she blocks me for reminding the last moments that we enjoy & she is angry for that, she says im discusting and why acting like that haha, I guess she just whants to dispose her feelings for me because she is leaving soon, Or i was just being too needy thats why i lost her The last conversation we had was so rude that i dont even reply because she blocks me & i dont whant to make an effort or gave her something because i will look like despirate..... .... i just wait her to unblock me and act normal😄 did i do the right thing? she is just 26 years old but dated & inrelationship with older man..... what do you think guys of my story???? can someone drop whatsapp number to have more advice..
Please shorten this & I'm happy to answer. Questions in the comments are really just for quick questions. If you'd like to get more in-depth, I have private coaching for that: soa.fm/dating-relationship-coaching/
@@SkillofAttraction do you think its good to stay cool after she block me and just ignore her,or should i make an effort or just send her food to make her happy or worst maybe
@@elchapo7475 I didn't read it because it's too long, but if a girl blocked you then it;s best to just stay calm & let her come to you at her own pace. Don't do anything for her until she shows that she wants you in her life again. Other than that, there's not really a lot you can do when you're blocked.
@@SkillofAttraction How do i know if a woman is trying to hide her feelings but trying to hide it so bad? now she doesnt even allow me to hug her, but we had sex 2x
Hi Eric ..I need advice as I am back in depression hope u can help me out... As u know my gf broke up with me twice and we got back together for the 3rd time in July we spend a good 2 month together in August my Birthday and in Sep her Birthday but last monday she Pulled back and say she is mentally tired and couldnt sleep at night for the pass 3 days ...i told her I arranged counselling session for us to help us resolve her problems but instead the lady Counsellor told her mental trauma is serious and may result her in Stroke and medical condition since she look pale and her blood pressure raise to 180..the counsellor told me to give in to what she want which is see me once a week and send her back before 9.30pm..I told the counsellor I am the man and I dont accept any negotiations and I will prefer she accept my term and boundaries since it was her who broke up with me twice.she said she love me but she cant take the stress anymore and she cant sit in my car because she cant breath everytime I am telling her to do what I want..yesterday she refuse to take my car and refuse to see me and told me to choose if I want to break up..at this point I have No Balls to walk away..i instead ask her if she still me ...she reluctantly say yes and unwillingly give me a hug and kiss...telling me she will not see me until she miss me...Today is my depression again Day 1 of No Contact ...we suppose to meet tonight but she said no she will text me when she miss me and she said she had not miss me because I keep wanting to see her late into the night which she only want to go home early by 9.30pm.. Should I pull back and No contact or tell her I am not happy she cancelled our Every Thursday night out....from what the counsellor told me she is really traumatised emotionally affecting her anxiety to please me that she cant sleep and she was crying her health is bad and she shaking and stress whenever I demand that she be a good gf listening to me... What should I do?
What if she haven't opened my message? I sent her 1 message asked how she is 3 weeks ago, sent her another on Thursday. She haven't opened this one either, nor replied. I just sent her a message: "hi, is everything ok with you?". It's unlike her to just ghost people.
Never double text a girl. She will think your needy for asking is everything ok . If she hasn’t opened it you have to just move on . Talk to other girls don’t invest your time on people like that
@@ddt4v3 When there's been a 3 week long gap, it's not considered "double texting". Being conserned about someone and reaching out vs acting clingy/needy are two different things. Being worried about someone we care about is a perfectly human reaction. But on the other hand, but I won't sit up checking my phone all the time and allow it to ruin my day.
@@SkillofAttraction I saw her on telegram, and it said "seen recently". I assume that recently is not 3 weeks ago. My message on Viber says it is delivered, but she doesn't open it.
My girlfriend's cat is dying I come home early I'm sick feel like crap it never came to mind hey maybe the cat needs help I'm sick not in the frame of mind to give a shit she comes home where's my cat my baby don't know find her cats on deaths door next thing I know it's not how are you feeling it's you need to move out WTF help please
Thank you for the 'super thanks'! So, it sounds like she's taking her frustration/sadness about her dying cat out on you, most likely because you're there & she has no one else to take it out on. Now, unless there are some other issues between you two & she's just using this as an excuse, I'd say that you have to be the bigger person here & be a bit empathetic. Does she deserve it? Probably not. But usually a women's anger towards you is something under the surface & not whatever's obvious, & you want to bring her back down to earth. In other words, chances are that she's not mad at you, she's mad at the situation & you just happen to be there to take all the heat. Plus, I'm sure she doesn't feel that you care about the cat she cares very much about. Always remember, that women argue with feelings, not facts...they attack you, not your argument. So anything logical that you respond with is just going to escalate this. So, I would tell her something along the lines of, "I understand that you're upset about the cat, & I feel terrible that the cat isn't doing well. I should've checked on the cat when I got home. I was distracted by my own illness. What can I do to help?" I know this isn't ideal, but you're not going to win this...& what she really needs is just to know that you care, because in her mind if you don't care about her cat, you don't care about her. I know that's ridiculous, but that's how think. You're not "losing" this, nor are you backing down & apologizing...you're simply empathizing & that's most likely what she want6s & needs right now.
See my guy shows me there is no future, I tried talking to him but he changes the subject. I feel I'm wasting time. He mostly calls and talks about his day, I feel like his therapist. We hardly see each other. I know he has priorities and obligations and I understand, but I feel it's going no where. Why bother when your the only one trying.
I've been in your position before & yes, it sucks. And yes, you're right...it's pretty pointless to continue investing if you're the only one trying. If you wanna give it one final try I made a video on what to do in this situation. It's aimed at men, but it's really same for anyone. ua-cam.com/video/aDW0Enxro4U/v-deo.html
Ok vid but, causes one to over think, analyze etc. Give space with Yur own time limit, then if no improvement, I think it would be best for ME to walk away.
She's not married, so she's fair game as far as I'm concerned...BUT she must also be putting in the effort to spend time with you. As I mentioned in my other comment on this topic, it's very possible that she's only interested in your attention. You'll know if it's more than that by whether or not she makes the effort to see you. Have you asked her on a date?
Oh, one thing I wanted to add...if she cheats on her boyfriend, she'll eventually cheat on you. Everyone think they're the exception to that rule, but I've never seen it go another way. So, before you get seriously involved with her, make sure that she leaves her bf. OR, just see this one as a little casual fun.
Hey I wanted to know does this kind of behavior continue in marriage by her living with you the mystery would definitely be gone. With female nature being like this I wonder how do men make it to marriage much less have a long lasting happy marriage
Yes, it continues...& marriage (or even cohabitating) makes it much more difficult, because she KNOWS that she has you & you can't just leave. However, there are still things you can do to help keep the mystery & challenge. Continue dating her: ua-cam.com/video/8QGBEnwuCpA/v-deo.html Boost attraction in a marriage: ua-cam.com/video/0ql0ZpYXEGQ/v-deo.html Keep attraction alive: ua-cam.com/video/J4DBJl-ONp8/v-deo.html Keep her chasing: ua-cam.com/video/mcTv27lktBc/v-deo.html Be a challenge: ua-cam.com/video/lavdqLqIr7o/v-deo.html You also want to continue having some independence within the relationship with activities & a social life that doesn't always include her.
I appreciate it man I want to be married one day I think I need to let go of the fairytale and just see this thing for what it really is. If u don’t have it together basically you’ll get your heart broken over and over again
@@antoniobarnes694 Basically. Women want a competent, confident man who can lead her, while knowing how to stir up her emotions. Where most men go wrong is they stop being the man she fell in love with.
Have a situation like that right now. We were on a date last Thursday . Kissed / danced, teased each other etc. After that day she didn't contact me anymore. I've contacted her once this Monday to set a date and she blew me off and said she has stress at work. Usually she called me every day. I'm still waiting for her to reach out, but it's difficult. Not gonna lie. Let's see if they always come back. It's hard to belive that women can go from enthusiastic to ignoring you that quick.
If you had a great date & got physical, but she's now blowing you off, chances are there's another dude in the picture. Either an ex came back or there's another guy she's seeing that she likes better. This happens a lot. The best thing that you can do is to just get back out there meeting/dating new women. If it doesn't work out with that guy, she'll b e contacting you at some point. Then you can decide if you want to give her another shot or not.
@@SkillofAttraction She is the sister of my best friend and I'm 33 and she is 22. A few days ago her brother and I got some drinks together. He told me, what she told him. I've been doing alot of things right, but I was way too insecure. Even in the bedroom. We had sex a couple of times but on one particular day she said : it's going to fast and we slept too soon with each other. I was like " no problem, we do it on your pace" I fd up the attraction way too hard through the insecurities. I don't think I can recover from this. Last week I had to contact her because I got an STD from her. Nothing serious. She didn't knew she had it. She said she was greatful that I took imidiate action and went to the doctor and told her. For 2 days we had contact but after that she got cold again. It hurts to see that she suddenly had time to talk when she got the news about the STD. I have to work on myself to become more secure within myself. Any suggestions how to improve?
Hi friend l got my broken relationship fixed with the help of this great spiritualist who brought my partner Back in 48hours after many years of separation.❤️❤️
*Here's a success story which, in my view, sells precisely what you are preaching - warning, long post:* We met in person at a local shopping centre where she works in a shoe store. I had been past a few times, been in the store and said hello, we got chatting. Over the following two weeks, I would be on my usual commute, i'd walk past the store and she'd wave me in for more chat. Eventually, I gave her my number. She wrote it down, and I left. I heard nothing for a week. I was going for another walk, walked past the store and she waved at me enthusiastically. She waved me into the store, engaging subtle touching and explained that her colleague had thrown the piece of paper out that had my number on it (whatever). I asked her if she needed a coffee for her shift which, she said, was draining her. She was appreciative, I got it for her. I gave her my number again, left, and she actually texted me within an hour of giving her my number again. In her texts she was calling me "babe", asking when I was available and signing all of her texts off with kisses. By the end of the text exchange, which I knew to keep brief, I had set a date and asked her whether 7:00pm for Saturday week worked for her (so, eight days from that Friday) . Nothing for a full seven days. No reply what so ever to that very basic question which would have set up the date. She finally confirmed she was available, and apologised for the late reply as she was busy. During that seven day gap, I sent NO FOLLOW-UP MESSAGE. The result? I went on a date that lasted a full 6 hours. Multiple locations/activities/settings, lots of chat (no quiet moments at all), lots of laughing, and banter. Plus, a first kiss. It ended really well with her saying "hope to see you soon". It's been around four days since that date, I don't feel i'm ready to text her. Nothing negative, i'm just busy, plus fancy the idea of having a weekend off. Personally, already i think we have both normalised the idea of lengthy silences between us. That's a good thing. It means we won't burn out during text while we have something to look forward to. But, overall moral of story, I think there was some testing on her part taking place during that period of silence. I am SO GLAD I did nothing to break the silence.
That's awesome! Yes, it was definitely a test & since you kept calm & confident she felt safe to go out with someone that she's clearly highly attracted to. Most men would've gotten angry or insecure that she wasn't reaching out or responding, & those kinds of men often turn into controlling, insecure, needy men. Sometimes these men turn abusive, whether physically or emotionally. Women have been through this many times, so they have to be sure before they open their heart & ultimately their legs. This is an important part of women that men need to understand...& if they like you, they will always test you. You didn't take it personal, as most men would, & because of that, you'll most likely be rewarded. Good job, man! 👍🏻
@@SkillofAttraction Cheers! You are one of my dating mentors, so it's a big thank you to yourself, AMS, and Corey Wayne. The triumvirate of dating coaches.
For questions to be answered in the comments, please give a "super thanks" or head over to my website & ask there.
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The best way to avoid her pulling away is you pulling away first: be indiferent, give mixed signals, dont be too available. She will think twice before pullin away from u
Yes, but there's always a little push/pull between a couple. Her pulling away WILL happen inevitably at some point.
@@SkillofAttraction not if the man is consistent with his indifference. Then she has no choice but to always chase. And we men can’t care about how they feel about it…
@@SkillofAttraction That’s the mistake men make;falling in love. FUCK THAT! If the woman leaves because of a man’s indifference,fuck her. This advice is for men who make the mistake of falling in love…
@@maatkheru1042 She'll still pull away occasionally. Women follow their emotions & those emotions are always in flux.
@@SkillofAttraction yes! ALWAYS in a state of fluctuation.
I stayed in frame the whole relationship and never chased. At one point in the relationship she started to pull away and I made the mistake of chasing her. Spelled the beginning of the end of our relationship
Yes, that can happen rather easily...it's happened to me before. It's really difficult to get your frame back once you've lost it. When a woman finds a weakness, she'll exploit it. On the positive side, it shows you where you need some work.
I agree with you that getting help from any other women on why she is pulling away will make things even more worst because they can’t understand these concepts.
Yes. What they tell you they want & what actually works are oftentimes polar opposites.
It's hardwired into their brain, a lot of them don't even know why they do it
That's one of the best answer's I've heard so far. It's been a long time since I've been in a relationship so this is helping me a lot. Thanks Coach.
Glad it was helpful!
i been listening to a lot of these and i really like the way you explain- there are too many overly macho fools out there giving advice - you make sense you are organized and do not waste words
Thanks man! I appreciate that! Hopefully you find some helpful advice!
F*ck that, if they are pulling away and playing games, walk away and block them on social media and everything else, dont see them again, believe me it'll only get worse, they'll just keep pushing you away because they know you'll come back
That's an emotional reaction & feminine energy. And YOU don't come back when she pulls away, SHE does if you handle it correctly. She'll be chasing you.
@@SkillofAttraction No when they are being nasty and abusive, like when she says to me during a disagreement get the f*ck outta my house, I don't even want you here, it's happened several times before, ive walked away, ghosted her and blocked her, that's not feminine energy at all
@@barneyrubble8839 That's not "pulling away". Pulling away is when a woman emotional distances herself.
I did all of this to her. Never again. Men, your priority should be you, your money, and your health. Never a woman.
Most men have done all this. Always see yourself as the prize...
This information is worth millions.✌🏿😊
Why, thank you sir!
@@SkillofAttraction Quite welcome. ✌🏿
I love this guy's videos. I've been watching since just before the Pandemic started.
Just very genuine advice. Not like a lot of others, you can consume Eric's content without fueling hate towards women.
Expect women to pull away. Sometimes see it as a positive, because it means you can have a break from talking to her.
Thanks, man! Ans yes, you're exactly right...
Erick I know that women only care about how they feel . But is funny when you as a men do the same , they can’t handle it. I had pull from some women in the past and they chase me harder , asking me if everything is okay and stuff like that 😂😂
She's expressing what she feels about you...& your indifference is causing her attraction to rise.
Yes, I am guilty of this. Eric you are on point & I am kicking & blaming myself for this. I was too available & over pursuing & that was a clear mistake. However I showed my indifference there after, the last time I saw her & just tried to share some good news to her? She responded to me in a very disrespectful way in being sarcastic & as a result, I took a self esteem hit as I really felt it & got fuming mad as this was definitely uncalled for. After the incident, I saw another side of herself & therefore I took action in by taking my power back as I created my own distance. On another occasion, I happen to run into her as she was sitting down in a room & at the same time I happen to run into a separate friend. While I was conversing with my separate friend who happened to be on my left, this sarcastic woman who happens to be on my right then turns to look at me & my presence for 2 to 3 seconds while I'm talking to someone else & then after that she turns her body & torso away from giving me her back & the cold shoulder as this was clearly spotted as I saw this from the corner of my eye. When I was finished conversing, I did not even bother approaching her as I kept my distance. I have enough self respect at this point. One day as I was just going about my day, I happen to see her yet again as we were walking in opposite directions & at this point I was clearly done with her as when she tries to get my attention by saying HEY!! As we got closer coming from opposite directions, I did in fact walked right past her acting as if she did not even exist as I kept on going without even turning around as I dropped her like a bad habit as I definitely had pulled away permanently. This woman is not who I thought she was as I need to take the time in getting to know someone before proceeding any further. This is her being clearly manipulative & showing me a clear straight disrespect in which I have no tolerance for by her clear bad body language. She sure has the nerve to treat me as I was not there so I returned the favor. There were no signs of effort, love, affection & or reciprocation as I was doing all the work but then stopped & moved on as I was exhausted. The only thing I did was ignore her after her disrespectful sarcasm.
Sounds like you did the right thing; however, keep in mind that women's tests can often seem like disrespect...there's a thin line between disrespect & women's tests.
These are probably the best pieces off advice.
Thanks man! If you put it into practice it'll definitely work. I have a few other videos on pulling away that will help too!
I feel like I’ve broken all of these rules for the break up. (Early on still) it’s only been about a week or so. But have I blown my chances? Because I’m doing no contact.
You can certainly recover & increase your chances if you start handling the situation right. I have a playlist of videos about breaking-up that may help: ua-cam.com/play/PL7GMy6_VPa3IdXy7pO4lC05ptCNVF6gg0.html But many of my videos will get you on the right path. Also, you can ask questions on my site (it's free) & get feedback from me & others: SOA.FM
First !! Great video as always , hope you doing good Erick take care 👊👊
Thanks, man!
great video. made all these mistakes. emotional in bad place because I was dealing with a bad accident at the same time. which even had her leaving me during that
Unfortunately women turn cold as ice when they lose attraction & respect for a man. A good woman will stick with you when you've fallen on hard times, but only as long as she's emotionally attached & you're working to change your situation.
@@SkillofAttraction thanks. oddly bad accident after getting back together and oddly on her roof to patch a small leak and then fell from ladder for bad broken tibia bone and long heal/compartment syndrome. One can only heal so fast. then staff infection. left in a very cold manner after awesome 3 years and 3 months prior a great 2 week trip.
I've been struggling with an alcohol addiction for months...my girlfriend knows about it. We live about an hour apart. She's literally driven down here to pick me up off my bedroom floor when I thought I was gonna O.D. That was 2 months ago...she loves me more than she did than. If you can't be open, honest, and vulnerable with your girl...she ain't the girl. She's my ride or die. I would do the same thing for her over and over
That's a completely different scenario. And I'd be very careful being too vulnerable with women...it can easily backfire on you. ua-cam.com/video/YYVGgWnUTzY/v-deo.html
Coach is it wrong to date another girl when your girl pulls away? This happened after she was feeling insecure about us because she is a healthcare worker and her schedule is a mess. She was constantly worried that she is not meeting my expectations and I reassured her. Immediately after she pulled away. Obviously, after getting the same treatment from my exgfs, Like PTSD I pulled back and began to look for other women and even have a "date" arranged this night. A part of me feels this is wrong but I'm so done with being taken advantage of with these women. Do you think this is wrong? Am I being too hasty?
Not necessarily. If she's a committed girlfriend (the relationship has been made "official" by both of you), then I would say it's wrong, because if you're both committed you have to learn to work through your issues. More importantly, men have to learn to build their tolerance to women's erratic emotions. However, if it's not yet official, then you owe her nothing. In fact, in that case, you SHOULD be dating other women until she locks you down.
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Do it, find another woman
Thank you for the video. Thankfully I didn't make too many mistakes, except for confessing my feelings to her. 😕 I immediately felt that I shouldn't have done that. Now I know the lesson was learned, even though all my friends are trying to be logical so they all say things like «WHY do you regret saying that, WHY do you think you shouldn't be open about your feelings with someone you're close with??? Not fair». As if it was supposed to be fair... Sigh.
I'm still confused though. My partner pulled back and asked me to give her 2-3 weeks of time and space. She didn't mean no texting - just not seeing each other - but I didn't text her anything for more than 3 weeks. She reached out once, I responded, but that was all. I would still like some of her posts though because I didn't plan to *ignore* her. Besides, she might be Fearful Avoidant, I've read a lot about this attachment style and know that it's the most complicated - you can't be needy, but they should feel safe with you so making them feel abandoned isn't a good idea. So I'm now absolutely confused. I texted her a few days ago, she seemed to be happy but I didn't know what else to say so I said something basic, like I'm glad you're doing well, and the conversation faded away. She didn't respond. And it wasn't just because of her, but also because I suddenly had nothing to say and no energy left (texted her and then found out that I'm fired, I was instantly ruined and couldn't think of our conversation anymore). And now I don't understand how I should contact her.
Should I wait for her to text me first? She can feel abandoned and lose her trust for me; she's traumatized and her trust is imperative to me. I feel like I've already made a mistake when I went No Contact because I promised her to always be there for her. I didn't ignore her though, just didn't text first.
Or should I text her every once in a while, calmly, without too much emotion/request? To ask her how she's doing and tell something about my own life. Not too much, so there's some mystery left.
How would you guys rate my current plan? I'm planning to fix my life situation just a bit because losing my job hurt my self-esteem even more. Tomorrow I'm going to work to a new place for the first time. I also try to keep myself busy and entertained by learning new skills and trying the things I've always wanted to try. And work on my mental health. I'm hoping to achieve some quick progress within the next few days, which I think is likely to happen, and then I'm going to text her again. Just to check. And then later ask her out, but it depends on how well the communication goes.
A few days ago, We fell out then she proceeded to pack her things and leave (something I have always spoken against). On her way out, I did not persuade her to stay. I simply told her to drop my house keys.
Good! Once it sets in that you're serious, she'll be back. Just stay strong.
I will say you hit the nail on the head with her pulling away due to stress is outside of the relationship! She’s finally building her dream home, but she just got hit with $11,000 bill out of the blue that she wasn’t expecting so it’s stressing her out and it’s making her shut down to me!
That happens sometimes, unfortunately. Women act on their current emotional state. It's best to ask her if she wants to talk about it. if she doesn't, then it's best to give her space.
@@SkillofAttraction we talked about it briefly, and I gave her some opinions that she didn’t agree with so she said that I was stressing her out! We talked briefly a few hours ago. She said that she was having dinner with her roommate that was five hours ago and she hasn’t texted me but she’s been online so that’s not normal for her! We usually text all the time because we’re in a long distance relationship, but I know if she wanted to talk she would text me , when she text me, I’m gonna mirror her time and be a couple hours before I respond! Right now she’s thinking that she can start the conversation anytime she wants and I know that’s not good, I got to get her to start thinking about what am I doing? Why isn’t he responding to me?
@@Joe-j1f In most cases, when women want to talk about it, what they really mean is they want to vent & you just listen. They're not really looking for solutions. So always ask, "do you want my opinion/advice?" Now, just give her space & once she begins to miss you she'll reach out.
@@SkillofAttraction Yeah, that’s exactly what I anticipate happening! I’m gonna leave her be when she wants to text me. She’ll reach out.
Loving your content.
Give this man more subs
Thanks, man! I appreciate that!
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Eric this is great advice man I really needed this this girl and I have been texting each other for a while and I'm going to take your advice
The trick is to be strong & unfazed by her distance. See yourself as the prize.
I immediately went no contact once I saw it’s been 5 days and no response to my text messages 🤦🏽 I’ll just carry on with life til you come to your senses
That's the best way to do it. Btw, I have a playlist of all my no contact videos you might find helpful.
@@SkillofAttraction does it work for a crush? I see where you talk about it used on a ex but this girl was a crush who out of nowhere stop responding and left me on read
@@pappymcallister2492 It can work on a crush. It really depends how much she values you or what you provide her with. But regardless of that, NC is really for you so you can heal & move on...it's just a nice byproduct that sometimes it causes her to miss you & realize life isn't so great without you.
Hey! Good job fixing the camera focus! ^.^
It's a whole new camera. But thanks!
Great video...and will follow...in my current situation:If you been a simp and disrespected...need to pull out your own heart out,work on yourself,worry about yourself and put her second or third...it doesnt matter wat she thinks...she will notice and question herself...just dont take your foot off the gas...be a gentleman always..but just dont give a fk..
Exactly...except it's not that you don't care, it's that you want to remain confident & be indifferent to outcomes. That's really the secret sauce.
@@SkillofAttraction that's the correct term..indifferent...thanku
..... great stuff! I Always appreciate a clear and concise review of the fundamentals! Bravo!
Thanks man! Much appreciated!
What if she is constantly acting hot and cold, but always seems to come back only to go cold again. It’s like 2 steps forward 1 step back every single TIME😩
If shes hot and cold she's not interested not waste your time
It means shes not serious about you g. But thats cool. I know its messing up your head but try not to let it get to ya
She’s playing games….
Next time she goes cold, confidently move on……
When a woman is behaving hot/cold, it's typically a sign that she's feeling uncertainty about you. Sometimes that uncertainty is a result of inconsistency from you. Tightening up your frame can help with this. As an example, when she's being "hot" with you, then reward her with our time & attention...but when she's being "cold", withdraw your time & attention until she begins warming up again. If she cares enough, this should give her the idea on how you expect to be treated.
One important take away from this video..."women act on their current emotional state". What often seems like games is simply her experiencing erratic emotions & responding accordingly. This doesn't mean that you have to tolerate it, but it's important to learn to accept innate female behavior, because you can't change it.
I just find your videos so interesting and helpful.
Thanks, man! Glad you think so! Thanks for watching!
Thanks so much for this.
Glad it was helpful!
really like this one, makes me think of my current situation, but I think i had less probs with the one girl that really loved me, but i suppose she was a bit submissive to me, with the other girls this is more relevant
I have a few videos about women pulling away... a very common issue men deal with.
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Wife deployed for a year. Ghosted me at month 9 for weeks got in shape, changed her grooming routines…then I questioned if she’d been faithful said yes…2 days later went through the phone and found out. She said “it was one time” not remorseful and it’s my fault and she wants to leave or “separate” basically to kind of keep me around to watch the 3 kids while she has weekends to continue screwing around. Starting to think I should just leave her. Been chasing her too, I’m about to cut that out.
This video should shed some light on this situation: ua-cam.com/video/w9FkQ_GMBDo/v-deo.html
Bro, if she wants to separate, it wasn't just one time. If she's going to do you like that, you don't want her back.
Thank you,a this is a great video, I've been watching on repeat during the this pull away phase of my 10 mo th relationship.
For context, my cat recently gave birth to kittens, this was something she'd been excited about happening for a while, but she started to pull away a week prior, when they gave birth I sent her some photos she seemed excited about it. Sadly one the babies passed away, I told her I was sad about it after she asked me how I was, I then asked her how she was and if she was okay...and she hasn't responded since. I'm curious to know why she's done this, but its why I've been watching g this video on repeat ever since to stop me from doing anything stupid.
Sorry for the long post, but have you got any thoughts on this?
Thanks again!
We started really clashing!!! She says she needs space to focus on herself and to take care of hers. I said ok then I texted her and I asked if she wanted to end our relationship she never replied. But a friend of mine told me she put on Facebook “I rather be told I don’t see a future rather then have my time wasted.” So what does she means, like what does wants from me? I need she said she wants space and I’m respecting it.
It means that her attraction levels for you is very low at the moment, & most likely she feels smothered by you. So, what you want to do is give her 100% space...no initiating contact, no secret message on social media to her, no viewing her stories or interacting with her posts, no asking her where you stand, or anything similar. Let her come to you. And your friend is wrong, btw..be careful getting advice from friends. After she's had a little space & she begins to miss you, then you'll most likely hear from her. At that point, greet her with an upbeat & playful attitude, & after a little back & forth banter, tell her that you want to see her & ask her when she's free to gt together. In he meantime, focus on yourself & becoming a better man.
Also, for future reference, please see my pinned comment.
@@SkillofAttraction Thank you so much!!! I actually love her very much and I want to marry her. I’ve made my mistakes in the past and I sometimes feel she hasn’t forgave me. But I really love her and I actually wanna marry her. I love her so much and I wanna do right by her. What you’ve said has made me feel a lot better about things and I appreciate you for taking the time to reply because you didn’t have to though you did. It’s been 2 weeks so I guess I’ll just continue waiting until she reaches out to me. No calls or texts and thanks again!!!
@@SkillofAttraction Here’s an update. I had a talk with her Aunt because she contacted me. She told me that my girl told her EVERYTHING. She told me where I went wrong at and she also told my girl where she went wrong at also. I told her I was respecting her space so I gave it to her. She says she think I should go see her. I said don’t just wanna pop up knowing we are at this delicate stage now and she snaps on me you know. She says I don’t think she’s going to snap on you She thinks she going to wanna talk to me and she thinks I should go see her. I know they are close like mother and daughter close. So, what do think of this?
@@dojuanbrown6665 Hmm, tough call. Normally I'd say absolutely do NOT show up unannounced...that's stalker type stuff & it scares women. However, if her aunt knows all the details & she talked to your girl about all this, then she may be onto something. It's still a risk though...a risk that she may get angry. But if her aunt is insistent about it, then perhaps she knows something we don't. So, go for it!
@@SkillofAttraction I’ll update you I leave Sunday
If you have at least 4 to 5 women the one you like most put her in the back. While you're busy with the others. They will reach out. Never reach out to the main one. She will treat you like the King. Because you aren't focused on her
Yes, mostly...but if you want to keep her you have to be sure that you do make time for her. What you mentioned will absolutely work, but not long term. Generally, keeping a majority of your focus on yourself & building value, & not getting attached to outcomes will have a similar effect long term. But also be sure to continue dating & courting her.
4 or 5 😂 dealing with one woman is bad enough
@@barneyrubble8839 It's much easier when you have options.
@@SkillofAttraction yeah is good to have options if the main one acting crazy you move to the next one is better like that
I did mistake chasing and apologize to her when she pull away and she started play mind games until discover this relationship advice now I'm Alpha man she pull away and come back herself apologizing.
That's great! No woman wants a guy who chases when she pulls away.
Super Thanks
You're welcome!
Hey coach, so I wanted your thoughts... Got into a scruffle with my girlfriend about late last month about how I felt she wasn't putting in effort, she was being cold in her replies to my text and skipping alot of them and the rest of that bull crap... Long story short... Told her I wasn't happy with it.. She said she'd change and put in more effort.. I agreed and everything was alright for about 2 weeks... But noticed yesterday she started selectively replying to my messages again... She did it again this morning and also yesterday was my dad's birthday... She saw my post about and didn't even bother saying anything... Personally my gut isn't too comfortable with the whole thing... Almost like she doesn't really care and she's trying to make me feel good... Not that she really cares... Her birthday is network but part of me kinda wants to just break up.. Especially since she's broken a boundary i put up of not appreciating selective replies... What do you think?
Are you seriously mad because she didn't respond to a social media post about your dad's birthday? Sounds like you need to pull the plug, man up and walk away. Then you can see how she responds. If she doesn't respond...oh well. Your nuts big enough for that? Have you even hit it yet? Boy I hope so the way you are behaving (it would be slightly less pathetic). You should never ask a woman to put 'relationship effort' in...that makes you look weak and needy, btw.
Well, of course boundaries are important, but if I'm going to be completely honest I feel like this is leaning towards micro-managing how she responds to you. It's one thing if her overall investment in you is lacking, but you can't be in control of how she interacts with you. However, if you're unhappy with how she responds, then it's better to mirror her until she becomes more invested. If you keep bringing this up she's going to see it as whining. Remember, women follow their emotions. So, she's either testing you to see if this gets under your skin, or her attraction levels are just on the low side at this point. I recommend that you just mirror her, because this way if it's a test, you pass it...you show her you're unaffected by this & she'll eventually stop because she doesn't get a reaction or the attention she wants. If her attraction is just low, then mirroring her will get it back up. You also avoid unnecessary conflict/drama this way. Now, if her investment is down across the board, then that's a little different. Is she making herself available for dates, is she affectionate, is she sleeping with you, is she doing most of the pursuing overall?
@@SkillofAttraction well... You may have a point but that's just the thing... Her overall investment just seems lacking,which was the main basis of our scuffle the last time... That she wasn't showing proper investment and effort and it wasn't doing it for me... She told me how she knew she wasn't doing her best and she blamed it on the fact that she was going through a mid life crisis and how she feels useless because I pretty much always do everything for her and she does nothing for me.... Long story short she promises to put in more effort and be involved I.e...being more responsive to how she replies my messages and all that and not just being cold... And she's been doing just that until yesterday where she was being all selective again and as far as being affectionate... Well... No.. She hasn't really... Last time we had a date was in April.. Heck last time we saw eachother was April... I didn't bother setting up meet ups cause her over all attitude wasn't really encouraging... Short replies... General coldness and uninterest... That's what led go me talking to her and telling her I'm not gonna take it anymore... I haven't been chasing as such ever since my talk with her or set any dates because I want to at least show that interest and enthusiasm but of recent we haven't even been talking much cause she says the power in her side is out so she doesn't get to charge her phone.. But the thing is... She still comes online... Her phone is still on... Just on Sunday she called me to send her money for data.... Today she messaged me to send her mum cash for transport... She even mentioned how we haven't talked in a while cause of her power outage thing and I told her yeah.. I was expecting her to apologize or layout a compromise but she literally ignores my response and other messages and just responds to something else... It just feels like she doesn't really care about us talking... She just does the bare minimum to keep me satisfied...
@@bryanwolf5468 That's something to pay attention to...if she's saying that you do everything for her, then this is a big reason why she's not. She doesn't have to, because she knows you will carry her weight. Also, she may be getting bored if you're not setting up dates. I understand that you may not want to because of her lousy attitude, but you still have to take the lead. Sometimes you just have to swallow your proud & take some action, because it's not really in a woman's DNA to take control of the situation. There's a good chance that she's just reflecting you, that she doesn't feel the need to take any action, because you don't seem into it. Also, you want to keep in mind that if you haven't been physically intimate for a while, she's going to naturally grow a bit distant. Sex is the glue for a relationship, despite what society says. So, what I'd do here is arrange a date. Focus on having fun on that date & leading her into the bedroom. After that, then gently back-off & let her invest a bit before you arrange another date.
@@bryanwolf5468 Bryan, you are texting too much, I bet. Plus, she likely feels you are acting feminine. Send texts when you NEED to. Time for you to pull back and maybe go on a break to restore polarity.
Hi I am always texting and calling her first, I always ask if I can come round and she always says not today. She initially would text me first sometimes, but she's not chasing me?
Shall I pull back?
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If we were only dating for a month and now she hasn't contacted me in about a month, is that a pull away or a break up?
With those conditions, it doesn't look good, unfortunately. Only being together for a month doesn't give her long enough to become emotionally attached to you. At this point it's still on you to keep the momentum going. What you should've done here is after not hearing from her for a week, reach out to her & arrange a date.
Your videos are priceless :) I wish I knew your videos early on
Thanks, man! It's never too late learn!
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Even if your in a committed relationship,if she’s actin bitchy for no reason and pulls away, then seek other women.She doesn’t care about commitment when she pulls away,so why should we men care either? That IS mirroring her actions,because we don’t know what she’s doing during her pull away nor will she know what we are doing. AND YES,IT’S A GAME, and they started it….
You clearly didn't watch the video. You're wrong with everything you said here. And just an FYI...when a woman is acting bitchy it's typically because the man is behaving weak.
Hey man! So I went on a couple dates with this girl. She isn’t my girlfriend. Everything seemed to be going fine. She didn’t show any signs of not being interested. As she was touching me, getting close to me, kissing me. Things changed once we said our good byes. She texted me saying she wanted a guy to “go the extra mile” meaning care for her, appreciate and be there for her. She said I didn’t tell her she looked pretty on our date. Which she got her nails done so I said they looked pretty. I liked them! She said I didn’t tell her thank you for lunch which again I did and she said you’re welcome. The only issue I feel she would have is when I said text me later. I honestly thought she was gonna text me when she got home but she got mad I didn’t make sure she got home safely.
My question is why do girls say you didn’t do something when you actually did? Are they trying to create drama or is this a test? I don’t think I handled it well when I thought I was standing up for myself and explaining that I did all those things she said I didn’t, she didn’t want to hear it. How would you handle this? Thanks so much for your help!
This sounds like a controlling, manipulative woman, who needs things to unfold exactly as she has envisioned...& if it doesn't unfold like that, she makes you feel guilty as a way to get you to chase & do as she wants. She's not following her heart...in her heart she clearly likes you or she wouldn't have been touching, kissing, etc. But, her head has a different agenda. She THINKS something like what she wants will make her happy...& it may make her happy initially, but in the long term it will drive her away, & she doesn't realize this. Always remember, don't give women what they want, give them what they need....they often don't understand what has an effect on them emotionally & they often don't know what they truly want. She THINKS she wants a beta male who worships her. Girls like that at first, but it gets tiring really quick & tuns her off.
You typically don't want to go into defense mode in situations like this. Men have a terrible habit of over-explaining themselves to women. This just sends women the signal that he doesn't believe in himself, whether that's reality or not. However, there's really nothing more that you could've said here...her mind was made up by the time she contacted you. If I were in your shoes I just wouldn't reach out to her anymore. If she's doing this after the first couple of dates, just imagine how much worse it will be after she gets comfortable with you. She'll criticize everything you do. I think you dodged a bullet here.
Sounds like shes at least upfront about servitude and not wanting a teammate.
I just got hit with this out the blue this week, and got accused of cheating. I think its from a death (patient)of someone close. Im just keeping cool and giving her time to gather her thoughts. She's been a little different since. Im Getting some of my other business done in the meantime. Work promotion and house sale in play. It's confusing but it is what it is. Time to go to the shooting range and have some fun!
You were accused of cheating?
How do we know this stuff? How did we gather this data? I enjoy your videos
Experience, studies, psychology.
When my last ex started pulling away , I smirked and told her " I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOU WHETHER YOU ARE DEAD OR ALIVE". Today she asks others where am I and what I am doing, she gives daggers to girls who talk to me.
I'm glad that worked for you, but you typically don't have to be that drastic. It's not so much that you shouldn't or don't care, it's more about being indifferent to the outcome because your confidence in yourself tells you that you'll meet another girl or equal or better quality.
In the words of the great Mother Teresa she said " The greatest disease is feeling unloved, unwanted and not being cared for". With that being said the reality is that she enjoys and gains sadistic pleasure in ghosting you , ignoring you as if you dont exist. Listen she wants your money nothing more to comprehend. Become a millionaire/billionaire and very soon they will know your Whatsapp number and run after you even if you are married. So she deserves to be told " I DONT CARE ABOUT YOU WHETHER YOU ARE DEAD OR ALIVE". Soon after that I advise all guys not to look at her, not a stare at her. It will give her lots of depresdion inside and she will chase you , because she enjoys guys giving her attention and validation. Have nothing to do with her. Guys please run after money because money smells better than girls.
@@craigsaunders9599 I have plenty of videos that cover these issues & how to effectively deal with them instead of pretending that you don't care.
All women play hard to get and enjoy you texting and calling her. You know we have to teach them that they have to earn us now. Because if you run after them they will tell their friends and other men who are not afraid to lose them that " I see this guy only as a friend , but he is persisting with me to be his girlfriend when I clearly stated I am not interested". I guarantee you that tomorrow if you win a billion dollar lottery she will run after you . But if you chase her she will treat you like a homeless person.
@@craigsaunders9599 I have videos covering that too.
Eric yesterday the girl I was telling you about texting me and was saying that I need to respect her because she was with her boyfriend but then she said that she don't care if I text her rather than calling her and then she told me that she was worried about me because she thought that I blocked her Eric what should I do about the situation?
It sounds like she's interested, but unless she's making some sort of effort to see you or spend time with you, you're wasting your time. She may just be interested in the attention from you that she's not getting from her boyfriend. A girl who is truly interested will be making time for you. She's in a relationship, but in my opinion, if she's not married then she's fair game. But you also don't want to waste your time when there are single beautiful women out there.
Hi very nice video u soo underrated
Hey, thanks! Be sure to direct your friends this way...
coach can you help.i founded my girl being disrespectful,she cant answer for 5,6 hours on a question "are you free tonight" while she is online whole time.and lying she didnt see text.
i told her if you gonna be desprespectful i m out,told her if she wants to talk ,just text me.otherwise good bye.
after 5 days.she twxted me if i wanna talk,i told her yes but tomorrow.next day she rearranged for some other day.i told her,ok,text me if you want.
2 weeks later,she didnt text me yet.should i just let it go?
She was testing you to see if you got emotional over her lack of response. She absolutely saw your message & purposely didn't respond. When something like this happens, then you become distant until she begins investing in you again. It's a blurry line between tests & disrespect sometimes, so it's not always easy to know the difference. I wouldn't call what she did disrespectful. Rude? Yes! But it was a test. Then she tested you again when you made plans to talk . She may be testing you again, but 2 weeks without a response is a long time. So, I recommend that you just move on. If she truly wants you she will not let you go... at least not permanently. In other words, if she cares & loves you, she will reach out at some point. However, you can't put your life on hold for a maybe. Don't wait for her. Let her come find you when/if she's ready. And if she does come after you, she will have a new respect & attraction for you, because you've been strong & confident by not chasing her.
@@SkillofAttraction it is not about her strictly.its just about did i make mistake when she contacted me after week by saying ok,call me if you want.
im trying to be best version of myself.so i wanna know.thnx coach 🙏
@@SkillofAttraction i just watched your video,and you sad there is situation like showdown in my case right now🤔🤔.she reached me to talk about problem,and then rearanged.but when i dont see her story,he gives me back equal.
i feel that we are in showdown situation.but im gonna let her pull the trigger first?🤔 thnx coach,your word beeing very helpfull
@@vitorbelfort2422 I wouldn't say it was a mistake, but I wouldn't have said "if you want", because that communicates uncertainty about yourself. Instead, it would have been better if you said, "call me when you want to get together".
@@SkillofAttraction tbh it was like this "text me,when you feel we need to talk"
i didnt realize that small words making such a big impact.😢
i know now that every word have meaning.
i guess details matter🙏
What if you are in a committed relationship and have done nothing to deserve the coldness?
Nothing changes. It's important to understand that women will act on their current emotional state, which is always in flux, whether you did anything wrong or not.
Hi Coach Erick tnx for the videos they help us a lot.
There is a girl that I ask a date and she always tells me I will let u know when I’m free she been telling me tht for 3 months but she always calls me when she needs right but the others time she don’t call me she alone text’call me when she needs something what should I do.
If she's been telling you this for 3 months & only contacts when she needs something, then she's stringing you along. You're providing something that she's not getting elsewhere; however, it sounds like you're providing it too easily for her. In other words, she doesn't have to work for it. So, what i recommend is you ask her one more time. If she gives you a similar response, then you have two choices: either begin to distance yourself & only give her minimal of your time unless she tells you when she's available for a date, or cut her off completely. And if she asks you for anything, tell her no. You don't have to be that blunt in telling her no, but you must stop giving to her for free, because she's seemingly just using you. Watch this video: ua-cam.com/video/KDt7GVMoY7k/v-deo.html Also, this one: ua-cam.com/video/4C0OlI9Lrh0/v-deo.html
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I did mistake confess my feelings to her and she continue with dramatic mind games i got tired leave her alone and later she came back with respect.
Boom!
i remember watching you when i was 16 im 20 now doing good got my own place car nd business thanks bro
That's great man! I'm glad to hear it! I envy those of you who have learned this stuff while you were young. If you only knew how many comments I get saying "I wish I would've known this when I was in my 20s"...including myself.
@@SkillofAttraction true savior 👍🏽
Hi friend l got my broken relationship fixed with the help of this great spiritualist who brought my partner Back in 48hours after many years of separation.❤️❤️
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I love this guy !
Thanks, man!
Me too!
I am texting with a girl which lives far away from me. We had very fun conversations. She told me she like guys who r totally into her. Does this means she likes guys chasing her. I didn't text her for few days. When I started now she is not replying while uploading stories. what should I do ?
Is this an exception ? should I chase her ?
@@guru_bro no never chase a girl . What a girl says she wants and what she actually wants are two completely different things. She’s testing you to see how compliant you are . Be yourself and text her like you have where you’re not always blowing up her phone . You will stand out by doing that and not bowing down to her. Wait to see if she messages you back … and if she doesn’t , she was just using you . If she really had high interest she wouldn’t just completely ignore you
No. Any girl likes to be chased n& of course she's going to tell you that, but only for a time before she begins to feel smothers, & then...she pulls away, or worse...she puts you in the friend zone. Women love attention, but if you want her to value you, you must be sure that she earns it while you still take the lead.
If you haven't seen my video on chasing, this will help you understand: ua-cam.com/video/wtozMa5qafM/v-deo.html
She's not interested. Move on.
I did all these things. 😂😂😂 Damn it!!!
Mistakes happen. All you can do is keep moving forward & not make those mistakes in the future.
My girlfriend is pulling away because shes greiving, what should i do. Do i need to initiate contact to her sometimes or just wait for her to always initiate contact. Im confused, please help, thanks
That's a little different than what I'm talking about here. Just remember, women act on their current emotional state, which is always in flux. Right now, emotionally, whatever she's grieving is taking priority. So, give her space, don' pressure her or get needy, & check in on her occasionally. If/when she seems like she's in a good/better mood, that's a good time to arrange a date or get together.
For future reference, please see the pinned comment.
Didn't I answer this question a few days ago?
I did the same comment in other video, i just thought you didnt notice. Thankyou for the response sir
@@kevinjugo1547 I responded to both...
Yes sir and i have another follow up question in there, hoping for your help again super thanks
I have a problem. Me and my girlfriend are in ldr relationship. I have accuse her of cheating but she is not. Because of that she is really angry with me and upset because I'm not trusting her. What is the best way for me to fix this issue?
Because of that she is not communicating with as like before. She texting me one word reply and after that she won't talk to me again for hours. She doesn't want to answer me and I calling her. And it has been 2 weeks when this happen. Any advice please
This is one of those rare occasions where you want to apologize if you haven't already. And in the future, you never want to directly accuse a girl of cheating unless you know for sure & have proof. If you just suspect it, then start asking questions without blatantly accusing her. Part of the reasons she's being so cold is because she's turned off, because this shows insecurity & demonstrates a lower status. You don't want to continue demonstrating a lower status by chasing her. So, if you haven't apologized, then do that...then let her come to you. In other words, stop initiating contact when she's giving you almost nothing in return. Give her space & let her reach out to you. This will demonstrate confidence & a higher value. When she does reach out, greet her with an upbeat, care-free attitude...don't bring up this situation anymore. If she's receptive & she's giving you a good attitude in return, then arrange a virtual date (ie: skype, zoom, FaceTime, etc).
Also, for future reference, please see my pinned comment.
@@SkillofAttraction she said to me she is loosing the will to continue the relationship even though I apologise with her.
I’m not going ish I’m on to the next ✌🏿
It's better to learn how to be emotionally unaffected by her pulling away.
Hi can someone help me, i have dated an engged woman, and we are dating for 8 months, We had sex 2x, and suddenly acts cold, when a try to have a sweet moments or hold her hand she avoids it, we also habe nicknames i call her mommy & she call me daddy but, she suddenly stops calling me that 1 month a go, i always tried to ask her in a private place but always says she dont like it, 2 weeks ago we have a date & she really enjoy it, she was so happy! and again suddenly keeps on blocking & unblocking me, specialy when she gets angry or try to be sweet, after 25 days she will leave soon for good , do you think she has a feelings for me?there are a few months that it feels like we are inlove together but now, she blocks me for reminding the last moments that we enjoy & she is angry for that, she says im discusting and why acting like that haha,
I guess she just whants to dispose her feelings for me because she is leaving soon,
Or i was just being too needy thats why i lost her
The last conversation we had was so rude that i dont even reply because she blocks me & i dont whant to make an effort or gave her something because i will look like despirate..... ....
i just wait her to unblock me and act normal😄 did i do the right thing? she is just 26 years old but dated & inrelationship with older man.....
what do you think guys of my story????
can someone drop whatsapp number to have more advice..
Please shorten this & I'm happy to answer. Questions in the comments are really just for quick questions. If you'd like to get more in-depth, I have private coaching for that: soa.fm/dating-relationship-coaching/
@@SkillofAttraction In short do you think she develope a feelings for me? thats why she is now always angry & blocking & unblocking me?
@@SkillofAttraction do you think its good to stay cool after she block me and just ignore her,or should i make an effort or just send her food to make her happy or worst maybe
@@elchapo7475 I didn't read it because it's too long, but if a girl blocked you then it;s best to just stay calm & let her come to you at her own pace. Don't do anything for her until she shows that she wants you in her life again. Other than that, there's not really a lot you can do when you're blocked.
@@SkillofAttraction How do i know if a woman is trying to hide her feelings but trying to hide it so bad? now she doesnt even allow me to hug her, but we had sex 2x
Hi Eric ..I need advice as I am back in depression hope u can help me out...
As u know my gf broke up with me twice and we got back together for the 3rd time in July we spend a good 2 month together in August my Birthday and in Sep her Birthday but last monday she Pulled back and say she is mentally tired and couldnt sleep at night for the pass 3 days ...i told her I arranged counselling session for us to help us resolve her problems but instead the lady Counsellor told her mental trauma is serious and may result her in Stroke and medical condition since she look pale and her blood pressure raise to 180..the counsellor told me to give in to what she want which is see me once a week and send her back before 9.30pm..I told the counsellor I am the man and I dont accept any negotiations and I will prefer she accept my term and boundaries since it was her who broke up with me twice.she said she love me but she cant take the stress anymore and she cant sit in my car because she cant breath everytime I am telling her to do what I want..yesterday she refuse to take my car and refuse to see me and told me to choose if I want to break up..at this point I have No Balls to walk away..i instead ask her if she still me ...she reluctantly say yes and unwillingly give me a hug and kiss...telling me she will not see me until she miss me...Today is my depression again Day 1 of No Contact ...we suppose to meet tonight but she said no she will text me when she miss me and she said she had not miss me because I keep wanting to see her late into the night which she only want to go home early by 9.30pm..
Should I pull back and No contact or tell her I am not happy she cancelled our Every Thursday night out....from what the counsellor told me she is really traumatised emotionally affecting her anxiety to please me that she cant sleep and she was crying her health is bad and she shaking and stress whenever I demand that she be a good gf listening to me...
What should I do?
Please see the pinned comment.
What if she haven't opened my message? I sent her 1 message asked how she is 3 weeks ago, sent her another on Thursday. She haven't opened this one either, nor replied. I just sent her a message: "hi, is everything ok with you?". It's unlike her to just ghost people.
3 weeks is a long time & not at all common. Have you seen her active on social media?
Never double text a girl. She will think your needy for asking is everything ok . If she hasn’t opened it you have to just move on . Talk to other girls don’t invest your time on people like that
@@ddt4v3 In theory, yes..but there are other things to take into account. There's nuance to all of this...
@@ddt4v3 When there's been a 3 week long gap, it's not considered "double texting". Being conserned about someone and reaching out vs acting clingy/needy are two different things. Being worried about someone we care about is a perfectly human reaction. But on the other hand, but I won't sit up checking my phone all the time and allow it to ruin my day.
@@SkillofAttraction I saw her on telegram, and it said "seen recently". I assume that recently is not 3 weeks ago. My message on Viber says it is delivered, but she doesn't open it.
Bedankt
Graag gedaan. Thank you for the 'super thanks'...much appreciated!
Thanks!
My girlfriend's cat is dying I come home early I'm sick feel like crap it never came to mind hey maybe the cat needs help I'm sick not in the frame of mind to give a shit she comes home where's my cat my baby don't know find her cats on deaths door next thing I know it's not how are you feeling it's you need to move out WTF help please
Thank you for the 'super thanks'! So, it sounds like she's taking her frustration/sadness about her dying cat out on you, most likely because you're there & she has no one else to take it out on. Now, unless there are some other issues between you two & she's just using this as an excuse, I'd say that you have to be the bigger person here & be a bit empathetic. Does she deserve it? Probably not. But usually a women's anger towards you is something under the surface & not whatever's obvious, & you want to bring her back down to earth. In other words, chances are that she's not mad at you, she's mad at the situation & you just happen to be there to take all the heat. Plus, I'm sure she doesn't feel that you care about the cat she cares very much about. Always remember, that women argue with feelings, not facts...they attack you, not your argument. So anything logical that you respond with is just going to escalate this.
So, I would tell her something along the lines of, "I understand that you're upset about the cat, & I feel terrible that the cat isn't doing well. I should've checked on the cat when I got home. I was distracted by my own illness. What can I do to help?" I know this isn't ideal, but you're not going to win this...& what she really needs is just to know that you care, because in her mind if you don't care about her cat, you don't care about her. I know that's ridiculous, but that's how think. You're not "losing" this, nor are you backing down & apologizing...you're simply empathizing & that's most likely what she want6s & needs right now.
@@SkillofAttraction thank you very much
See my guy shows me there is no future, I tried talking to him but he changes the subject. I feel I'm wasting time. He mostly calls and talks about his day, I feel like his therapist. We hardly see each other. I know he has priorities and obligations and I understand, but I feel it's going no where. Why bother when your the only one trying.
I've been in your position before & yes, it sucks. And yes, you're right...it's pretty pointless to continue investing if you're the only one trying. If you wanna give it one final try I made a video on what to do in this situation. It's aimed at men, but it's really same for anyone. ua-cam.com/video/aDW0Enxro4U/v-deo.html
Ok vid but, causes one to over think, analyze etc.
Give space with Yur own time limit, then if no improvement,
I think it would be best for ME to walk away.
It's your behavior & mindset that will determine the outcome.
Eric now she just said that she just still don't mind if I like her even though she's in a relationship
She's not married, so she's fair game as far as I'm concerned...BUT she must also be putting in the effort to spend time with you. As I mentioned in my other comment on this topic, it's very possible that she's only interested in your attention. You'll know if it's more than that by whether or not she makes the effort to see you. Have you asked her on a date?
Oh, one thing I wanted to add...if she cheats on her boyfriend, she'll eventually cheat on you. Everyone think they're the exception to that rule, but I've never seen it go another way. So, before you get seriously involved with her, make sure that she leaves her bf. OR, just see this one as a little casual fun.
No but she thinks of me as her best friend but I just don't see her in that light
@@steveobaby6048 Have you told her that? Have you told her how you see her?
@@SkillofAttraction I told her that I like her is she respects that
you are good brotehr
Thank you, sir!
I don’t care why she’s pulling away… I’m gone .. ✌🏿.. she will have to contact me
How you handle the situation makes all the difference.
9:45
❣️
Hey I wanted to know does this kind of behavior continue in marriage by her living with you the mystery would definitely be gone. With female nature being like this I wonder how do men make it to marriage much less have a long lasting happy marriage
Yes, it continues...& marriage (or even cohabitating) makes it much more difficult, because she KNOWS that she has you & you can't just leave. However, there are still things you can do to help keep the mystery & challenge.
Continue dating her: ua-cam.com/video/8QGBEnwuCpA/v-deo.html
Boost attraction in a marriage: ua-cam.com/video/0ql0ZpYXEGQ/v-deo.html
Keep attraction alive: ua-cam.com/video/J4DBJl-ONp8/v-deo.html
Keep her chasing: ua-cam.com/video/mcTv27lktBc/v-deo.html
Be a challenge: ua-cam.com/video/lavdqLqIr7o/v-deo.html
You also want to continue having some independence within the relationship with activities & a social life that doesn't always include her.
I appreciate it man I want to be married one day I think I need to let go of the fairytale and just see this thing for what it really is. If u don’t have it together basically you’ll get your heart broken over and over again
@@antoniobarnes694 Basically. Women want a competent, confident man who can lead her, while knowing how to stir up her emotions. Where most men go wrong is they stop being the man she fell in love with.
Have a situation like that right now.
We were on a date last Thursday . Kissed / danced, teased each other etc.
After that day she didn't contact me anymore.
I've contacted her once this Monday to set a date and she blew me off and said she has stress at work.
Usually she called me every day.
I'm still waiting for her to reach out, but it's difficult. Not gonna lie.
Let's see if they always come back.
It's hard to belive that women can go from enthusiastic to ignoring you that quick.
If you had a great date & got physical, but she's now blowing you off, chances are there's another dude in the picture. Either an ex came back or there's another guy she's seeing that she likes better. This happens a lot. The best thing that you can do is to just get back out there meeting/dating new women. If it doesn't work out with that guy, she'll b e contacting you at some point. Then you can decide if you want to give her another shot or not.
This video may help: ua-cam.com/video/msLU65rVbjU/v-deo.html
@@SkillofAttraction She is the sister of my best friend and I'm 33 and she is 22.
A few days ago her brother and I got some drinks together.
He told me, what she told him.
I've been doing alot of things right, but I was way too insecure.
Even in the bedroom. We had sex a couple of times but on one particular day she said : it's going to fast and we slept too soon with each other.
I was like " no problem, we do it on your pace"
I fd up the attraction way too hard through the insecurities.
I don't think I can recover from this.
Last week I had to contact her because I got an STD from her.
Nothing serious.
She didn't knew she had it.
She said she was greatful that I took imidiate action and went to the doctor and told her.
For 2 days we had contact but after that she got cold again.
It hurts to see that she suddenly had time to talk when she got the news about the STD.
I have to work on myself to become more secure within myself. Any suggestions how to improve?
Hi friend l got my broken relationship fixed with the help of this great spiritualist who brought my partner Back in 48hours after many years of separation.❤️❤️
To get back your ex specific person broken marriage or banish third party from your relationship inbox father right away
This shit just gets too complicated.
Like anything else, it's going to seem that way until you get some experience under your belt & it clicks for you.
its always another three hundred guys bro
That attitude will become a self fulfilling prophecy. While it happens, a woman pulling away is rarely due to another guy.
Guhhv
Terrible advice. Secure Women do not chase.
For a worthy man, they absolutely do! In most cases it's just not overt, like men. I explain that here: ua-cam.com/video/wtozMa5qafM/v-deo.html
*Here's a success story which, in my view, sells precisely what you are preaching - warning, long post:*
We met in person at a local shopping centre where she works in a shoe store. I had been past a few times, been in the store and said hello, we got chatting. Over the following two weeks, I would be on my usual commute, i'd walk past the store and she'd wave me in for more chat. Eventually, I gave her my number. She wrote it down, and I left.
I heard nothing for a week. I was going for another walk, walked past the store and she waved at me enthusiastically. She waved me into the store, engaging subtle touching and explained that her colleague had thrown the piece of paper out that had my number on it (whatever). I asked her if she needed a coffee for her shift which, she said, was draining her. She was appreciative, I got it for her. I gave her my number again, left, and she actually texted me within an hour of giving her my number again. In her texts she was calling me "babe", asking when I was available and signing all of her texts off with kisses. By the end of the text exchange, which I knew to keep brief, I had set a date and asked her whether 7:00pm for Saturday week worked for her (so, eight days from that Friday) . Nothing for a full seven days. No reply what so ever to that very basic question which would have set up the date. She finally confirmed she was available, and apologised for the late reply as she was busy. During that seven day gap, I sent NO FOLLOW-UP MESSAGE. The result?
I went on a date that lasted a full 6 hours. Multiple locations/activities/settings, lots of chat (no quiet moments at all), lots of laughing, and banter. Plus, a first kiss.
It ended really well with her saying "hope to see you soon". It's been around four days since that date, I don't feel i'm ready to text her. Nothing negative, i'm just busy, plus fancy the idea of having a weekend off. Personally, already i think we have both normalised the idea of lengthy silences between us. That's a good thing. It means we won't burn out during text while we have something to look forward to.
But, overall moral of story, I think there was some testing on her part taking place during that period of silence. I am SO GLAD I did nothing to break the silence.
That's awesome! Yes, it was definitely a test & since you kept calm & confident she felt safe to go out with someone that she's clearly highly attracted to. Most men would've gotten angry or insecure that she wasn't reaching out or responding, & those kinds of men often turn into controlling, insecure, needy men. Sometimes these men turn abusive, whether physically or emotionally. Women have been through this many times, so they have to be sure before they open their heart & ultimately their legs. This is an important part of women that men need to understand...& if they like you, they will always test you. You didn't take it personal, as most men would, & because of that, you'll most likely be rewarded. Good job, man! 👍🏻
@@SkillofAttraction Cheers! You are one of my dating mentors, so it's a big thank you to yourself, AMS, and Corey Wayne. The triumvirate of dating coaches.
@@debonaire_nerd Thanks, man! I appreciate that!