the pain in his voice really broke my heart. if she feels the same feelings for a guy she's known a month as she does her partner of 5yrs, then her love isn't worth shit
Women tend to fall in love with whoever they are having sex with a lot more than men. With men, sex tends to me more detached from love. Not completely, but the distinction exists
He was just so heartbroken I know the feeling of hearing that and someone saying I love you both. You cannot love 2 people at the same time especially when cheating
And this is why in America you cant be compelled to testify against your spouse. They can torture you and gaslight you so badly that you no longer think like a normal human
@@alanj5438in America? Are you serious? You’d have to set her up on multiple felonies. But if you stay for grudge f**kin and emotionally destroy her she’ll self destruct on her own. The key is to break it off and evict her BEFORE she fabricates the DV charges. It’s a dangerous game. When you start fearing for your safety in your sleep it’s time to change the locks.
@kennybachman35 look at the actual recent stats. Courts are much more fair in dealing with custody these days. This is an ongoing stereotype based on history and not reality.
What blows my mind is that you know she is finding a way to spin it that it’s her husband’s fault because of xyz. Unfortunately I’ve seen other women like this that are so self-absorbed and just take, take, take in a relationship until the dude is left a subservient shell of-a-man and ultimately isn’t attractive to her anymore. Stay dominant fellas. Set clear boundaries that you aren’t their caregiver. They won’t like it, but also they will respect you a lot more and hopefully this doesn’t happen.
Almost a 1 for 1 that happened to me. I was with her for 5 years. Cheated on me with co worker. Said she loved us both. We split up. I lost a bunch of weight and improved my life and she sent me an email 2 year later asking about me. I never responded. I’ve been in a relationship now with a much more attractive, a better woman for the last 3 years.
I was with a girl for 4 years and she got pregnant by a guy she was cheating on me with for years. took me two years to stop thinking it could work again. this guy needs us
As someone that went through this exact situation (but worse, if you’d believe it), Stav hit the nail on the head with that last comment. When the other dude bounces and you've already moved on, it will hit her like a ton of bricks. Who knows what goes through their skulls. We split in January of 2023, and to this day she is trying to lure me back into a relationship. We have a son, so im forced to stay in contact with her for his sake. If you read this caller, youre gonna be so much better off without her man. I know how much it hurts, as well as how many little seeds of self-loathing and self-blame it plants, but youre gonna be okay, homie. Youll be happier than ever, but you just gotta give it time. Hit the gym, get some sun, and be kind to yourself. None of this is your fault.
first gf did a cheat and run on me. had a kid and maried the guy. he was a pos and years later she was in my dms. no thanks. shes is perpetually single now and did the single mom thing for so long (im old). i dont hate her or wish her bad but there is a strong feeling of vindication. i eventually got married and have been rocking it for 18 years in a healthy relationship. shes still unmarried in her 40s. sad thing is, she would have been my one and done. first and last. coulda loved her my whole life.
He’s a good man for trying to work through it if it was a one night fling. He’s a smart man for going through her phone and figuring out the whole story.
3 options: 1. Divorce lawyer and therapy. Go grey rock with the wife and execute your exit plan to move on with your life. 2. Open relationship. She doesn't get a choice. She smashed door open and she gets no say on boundaries or if it gets closed. She doesn't get to ask where you stayed last night or who is the girl texting you. When you find the right girl, leave the wife for the one who wants exclusivity with you and divorce then. 3. Be a loser who's wife walks all over him and neglects him for another man. Let it eat you alive inside until it breaks you as a person and rots you to the core. I don't recommend #3.
2 also never works for the guy unless he's also got in insane shape as if he somehow knew this was going to happen and wanted it to happen. The guy always let's himself go in the relationship and never gets any when the relationship opens.
2 is a BAD option. Cheaters often suggest this option themselves bc it eases their guilt (if that’s an emotion they’re even capable of) but more importantly they can say, “well you slept with so and so!” The fact it’s completely different doesn’t matter. You’ve lost your leverage on the moral high ground…
He can play music and get on stage, cook, is decently attractive, and seems to have some emotional sensitivity (even if a bit naive). He will be fine and probably eventually score with someone cool and worthy.
SAME. THING. Happened me. I love you both IS so crazy and hurtful. Married 12 years. I got to leave the marriage with my integrity intact and went on a wild streak. Hang in there.
To the guy on the phone. You seem like a wonderful human being. But this woman is taking advantage of that. My friend if you keep allowing this behaviour it will only get worse. The other thing is the more you allow, the less respect she will actually have for you...and she ll go with the other guy anyway. I guarantee she ll go with the other guy, it wont work out cos they barely know each other...and she ll come crawling back. And it ll continue...she ll cheat again. Because she has no respect for you. Take back some self respect and power and end this now. Because it will only get worse. You will get a woman who deserves you and who will make you truly happy. Because being honest my friend...you sound fucking beaten down. This womans treating you like shit. Please leave now..because it will only get harder. Best of luck.
Becoming a hater of all women is not necessary here. Cutting her off would be called self-respect. There ARE better women out there. We just need to screen them for character better and maintain self-respect within relationship, ESPECIALLY in marriage.
Being slightly misogynistic is important for developing self respect when it comes to dudes who have no respect for themselves in a relationship. When people say "misogynistic' nowadays, it rarely means "hatred of all women." It basically just means "any negative generalised opinion about women at all." Dudes that lack this kind of self respect tend to have too few of these opinions and the introduction of some of them can really help them be a more well rounded person. I know because i was one of them.
@@callanc3925 you can do this in the framework of "some people are going to suck, and women are people so some women are going to suck." you can also switch "women keep doing x" to "the shitty women i've had bad dates/interactions/relationships with keep going x." the benefit this has is that you learn to see shitty behaviors in isolation as what they are without needing to link them to something they're only related to in terms of how gender roles encourage/discourage certain expfressions of shittiness
If you read this caller then here's how you have to look at it because I know it's easy to say leave when you don't have the feelings that you have for this woman, it's a lot harder when you have that love there, you envisioned a whole life together and now it feels so damn hard to picture what your life will be like now it's over. There's often a part of us that wants to forgive, that feels like we can do something different and that person won't hurt us again. The way I see it though is that she broke a trust that is fundamental to any relationship working, if you can't trust what your wife tells you or what your wife is doing then the marriage can't work. She broke your trust when she cheated on you. She broke it again when she lied and said it was a one night stand. Each time she only told the truth when you had found it already for yourself, that's not the actions of someone who made a mistake and really regrets it. That's the actions of a woman that on some level maybe even just subconsciously that feels uncomfortable with the idea of spending the rest of her life with you, you're one year into a marriage and she is already cheating on you. These are all the things she did wrong and that's why you should leave. But if you were to stay... What would that relationship look like? Would you be able to trust her fully again? Feel comfortable with her going away? Would you be able to not be paranoid and controlling? Because these things will make the relationship miserable, even if you were to stay with her the relationship would never be the same again. It is a horrible feeling and I really sympathise for you, but the relationship you had with your wife is dead, you could, technically start a new one with her, but it is one of distrust and lies, and I really think you will be a lot better off without her in your life. If you do leave you need to really understand how bad what she did was, because there will come a time, when it doesn't work out with this new guy, that she comes back, tail between her legs, begging for forgiveness, that's when you'll need to be strong again.
@@ayushpadiyar8846she didn’t say that (not defending) but he said she “all but said” meaning whatever she said was enough for him to interpret it that way… of course with all of the other context that is pretty minute and irrelevant-but if it was the only part of why he’s feeling hurt would be a bit different.
@@michellewitt2071 since he's from halifax, kinda yeah. Really depends on the community. Folks from rural NS tend to be what people think of as the sterotype.
nothing wrong with being head over heels over a woman and being all lovey dovey. it's okay to love hard and be vulnerable. that's one of life's true treasures is to completely vulnerable with your girl and giving her your all like she does for you. the thing is you also need enough self respect to not tolerate mistreatment. if you find out your girl is cheating on you, there's no going back. she wouldn't have been with another guy if she really loved you. don't waste your breathe trying to see what you can do to fix the relationship. the relationship was over the minute she chose another guy. there's plenty of beautiful and great women in the world who are great matches with you and will love you for who you are and won't fuck you over. i promise you. sometimes people fuck you over and you have to be able to move on to the next part of your chapter. that's life. it's like drake said.. When a good thing goes bad it's not the end of the world, it's just the end of a world that you had with one girl.
Some notes on this as a 42 year old who broke up with a Dismissive Avoidant woman last year (because that's what this is, btw, dismissive avoidance). So first things first, cheating is almost always a sign of dismissive avoidance. That's the exacttttt type of person who just 'gets bored'. There's no gender involved in this as it's a function of upbringing*. When a dismissive breaks up with you the irony is that YOU'RE THE ONE WHO HAS TO GO NO CONTACT WITH THEM. Because Stavvy is right here, once they realize the grass isn't greener they will try to hoover you back up. You can not be there for that shit. *Sidenote to anyone who is dismissive avoidant--it is curable. Look into DBT therapy or sensorimotor therapy.
TO THE GUY ON THE PHONE: The time is now for damage control and rebuilding. She’s your wife, so make sure you can PROVE beyond a doubt she cheated. Do not let her get anything else from you. It’s lawyer time. Also, do not kid yourself - this is not longer a nice girl. She WILL get what she can. Second, is that you HAVE to self improve now. If you sit around and complain, and drink, and never get better - she will, and you won’t, and it’ll kill you even worse. You got this, but you gotta want it for yourself. After
This happened to my bf. His ex lied and said she was going to France with her friends for a week, but really she went to Germany to hook up with a guy. They were together like 9 years I think? He went to therapy after because he kept thinking he was crazy. (She was also BPD and went full Amber Heard on him a couple times. Broken bottles and everything.) Please seek therapy dude!! You're worth it to become the best version of yourself!
Also, I can hear someone thinking it now. "She needs the therapy!" Right, she does. But this isn't about her. Fuck that bitch, let her figure it out on her own. This is about you and bettering your life because you deserve it.
Its so insanely true and goes for all "redpill" content. It really provides some of the other side to the world that is necessary for a balanced opinion/values system, but its so inherently unbalanced on its own that you cant really keep watching it for very long without becoming a total loser or psychopath.
Just went through something very similar to this, together 5yrs married just over 1 when I found out she was cheating. I say get everything you need to divorce and think of her as dead to you, the person you thought she was was isn’t who she really is. Block her on everything you have and focus on yourself! You won’t have to live with a guilty conscience rest of your life.
I even understand for her perspective how she may feel in a way. You're in a long term committed relationship and you meet someone new and it feels good and you develop a crush on them. But being an adult is acknowledging that's a fleeting feeling and is in no way the same as what you have with a five year relationship. It's normal to have a crush on someone you just met, it's absolutely fucked to go through with it and fuck them and then lie about it.
People, NEVER give a cheater a second chance. Once they’ve stepped out on you, it’s no over. No bargaining, no bs, just gtfo as soon as you can. It’s simply not worth it.
Genuinely the only way to retain any self respect out of this is if you end it and never take her back. It's over and you need to be the one to end things before she does to save any dignity at all. Good luck to bro
God damn, the "...you're out there, you're at Arby's..." like its where this kind of random, spontaneous love can happen just absolutely fucking killed me 😂 (Not taking away here that the wife is absolute trash)
Its soo so so hard at first to see the truth that this person actually sucks, but soldier on brother this is a massive life lesson that will change you forever
Get out before it gets even worse. Cause it will get worse, I’ve been through this and even more with the same person. It truly gets worse if you just assume she will stop, it just enables the behavior. It will take years to get over this.
Finding a longterm partner can be really difficult for a lot of people, and some dread being alone so much that they’ll consider dealing with this garbage
Just like myself, a woman who had men do this to me, I'm on a misandry bender right now. And no I don't hate all men, but I sure as hell ain't dating them anymore. The men that pull towards me and vise versa, it is toxic. So, I'm trying to find myself, figure out WHY the hell this is and figure it out later. No kids for me so it's all just center focused right now. I know what this guy's feeling, and I just want him to know I get it, even as a woman. You need some time to think, brother, and just figure yourself out first before you even THINK about going into another relationship.
The Andrew Tate advice is legitimately good advice lmao. I feel for this dude, but you can tell he gets WALKED ON constantly. The fact that your first instinct after hearing that she cheated on you was "let's work through it" is fucking OUTLANDISH. Have some self respect, have a backbone, go to the gym 5 times a week, and never let this happen again. Also, this woman will get hers, don't you worry about that.
Thats a fact. Really just consume any red pill content for a limited time. Once youve learnt the basics and start noticing things are repeating and turning into a "hate on women" segment, dip out and get on with your life.
hope this guy has solid bros in his life to help him get through this and tell him to cut the shit when his wife inevitably begs for a second chance. goddamn dude.
Cheating is ultimate betrayal. I couldnt give someone another chance because I could never fully trust them again, and thus, never truly forgive them. Which would ultimately be unfair for them. I've always felt this way about my friends too. I had a friend confide in me and tell me he had cheated on his wife. It completely changed my perspective on him. If he could betray her, the woman he married, how easy would it be for him to betray me? Loyalty matters. A persons character matters.
She thinks she's in love with the affair partner when in fact she just has a little school girl crush and is infatuated which will wear off in time. Then she'll be left in the dust (hopefully) by this guy and it'll be way too late.
Dude, it's so brutal how someone could treat their partner so well, and then only to have that repaid with this level of betrayal, holy shit. I kinda get why a lot of men have just checked-out from being a 'nice guy', it doesn't pay off, not in the short-term, and not in the long-term.
Went (and still going) through the exact same thing. Except with me, 9 months later, I’m still trying to make it work. We’re both active duty military and have two kids together, so splitting up complicates things, obviously. But I’d be lying if I said I’m only sticking around and trying for the kids. Love my wife, at the end of the day, ya know. This has completely changed me. Broken me. It’s wild hearing him describe what happened and how closely it parallels my situation.
We've all been there. Wondering if you're getting cheated on or if your sognificant other would cheat. But one thing is for sure, some of us make it VERY clear what the consequences of cheating are, and some of us do not. So If you haven't made it clear folks, you have some homework to do. And if you're afraid to do that, it might be because your unconsciously allowing it.
Realistically its more important that he makes it clear to himself what the consequences are. One thing people mix up a lot is thinking boundaries are a way of controlling the other person. In reality, boundaries are for controlling your own reaction to things. If she wants to fuck around on you, you cant really stop her. But what you can do is instill in your value system that if someone cheats on you even once youre out for ever blocked number new address.
my ex of 6 years basically had another gf and they wrote letters to each other after she moved out of state but he was planning on visiting her eventually plus he was on feeld looking for fwbs
He needs to call all the divorce lawyers in the area so she has no access to them because it would be a conflict of interest. He needs to strike first.
Comparing Andrew Tate to taking chemo is one of the funniest statements I’ve ever heard
It was a beautiful metaphor😂
and its pretty spot on lol
About as spot on as it was hilarious 💀
Guest so lame for not letting that marinate
One of the best analogies I've ever heard and off the cuff lmao
the pain in his voice really broke my heart. if she feels the same feelings for a guy she's known a month as she does her partner of 5yrs, then her love isn't worth shit
If my wife did this I'd be so broken. This is so awful. People are insane.
Women tend to fall in love with whoever they are having sex with a lot more than men. With men, sex tends to me more detached from love. Not completely, but the distinction exists
@@ScuffedLandlordthat's quite the generalization, who hurt you?
He was just so heartbroken I know the feeling of hearing that and someone saying I love you both. You cannot love 2 people at the same time especially when cheating
@@Freddisred naw bro that’s true
"get him trespass and stand your ground" lmao
lmao
He needs to get a second job that pays him in cash so he can purchase untraceable garden equipment.
"Get the sherif!" made me laugh so hard hahaha
love stavvy compassion
And this is why in America you cant be compelled to testify against your spouse. They can torture you and gaslight you so badly that you no longer think like a normal human
dude he was like another 7 seconds of talking away from just sobbing uncontrollably. you could hear it in his voice.
Good on him to power through and get his point across
I think it’s pre recorded but yea he was going through it. Cold world
I feel for him, hope he’s doing good
dudes can suffer through a lot, but saying it out loud is always tough
Imagine having to parent your kids after your wife did this.
How would she get custody she doesn't even know how to cook for herself?😂
@@alanj5438in America? Are you serious? You’d have to set her up on multiple felonies. But if you stay for grudge f**kin and emotionally destroy her she’ll self destruct on her own. The key is to break it off and evict her BEFORE she fabricates the DV charges. It’s a dangerous game. When you start fearing for your safety in your sleep it’s time to change the locks.
the government would have to take over cuz I'd be in jail for murder 1
@kennybachman35 look at the actual recent stats. Courts are much more fair in dealing with custody these days. This is an ongoing stereotype based on history and not reality.
parenting the cheaters kids
No way to be with a woman like that ever. The caller clearly has values this woman will never have, not even close.
What blows my mind is that you know she is finding a way to spin it that it’s her husband’s fault because of xyz. Unfortunately I’ve seen other women like this that are so self-absorbed and just take, take, take in a relationship until the dude is left a subservient shell of-a-man and ultimately isn’t attractive to her anymore. Stay dominant fellas. Set clear boundaries that you aren’t their caregiver. They won’t like it, but also they will respect you a lot more and hopefully this doesn’t happen.
It’s very common.
@@PassTheWalnutvery true and very depressing because I can't even imagine thinking this way
This guy is pouring his heart out, fighting to hold back tears, and on screen it pops up and says "hilarious moments from the pod"!
😂😂😂😂😂
He called Stavvy, he knows what he's getting.
Their commentary is hilarious, not so much the situation
That's some Nick shit lol
When you live in Clown World -- everything's a joke.
Almost a 1 for 1 that happened to me. I was with her for 5 years. Cheated on me with co worker. Said she loved us both. We split up. I lost a bunch of weight and improved my life and she sent me an email 2 year later asking about me. I never responded. I’ve been in a relationship now with a much more attractive, a better woman for the last 3 years.
Aw hell ya this is the ending we all hope for
congrats buddy, proud of ya :)
So are we all reporting a wellness check on this guy?
Please I hope this guy is alright
I was with a girl for 4 years and she got pregnant by a guy she was cheating on me with for years. took me two years to stop thinking it could work again. this guy needs us
Good for you Danny phantom
As someone that went through this exact situation (but worse, if you’d believe it), Stav hit the nail on the head with that last comment. When the other dude bounces and you've already moved on, it will hit her like a ton of bricks.
Who knows what goes through their skulls. We split in January of 2023, and to this day she is trying to lure me back into a relationship. We have a son, so im forced to stay in contact with her for his sake.
If you read this caller, youre gonna be so much better off without her man. I know how much it hurts, as well as how many little seeds of self-loathing and self-blame it plants, but youre gonna be okay, homie. Youll be happier than ever, but you just gotta give it time. Hit the gym, get some sun, and be kind to yourself. None of this is your fault.
ain't no one gonna want her for a serious relationship with this back story.
first gf did a cheat and run on me. had a kid and maried the guy. he was a pos and years later she was in my dms. no thanks. shes is perpetually single now and did the single mom thing for so long (im old). i dont hate her or wish her bad but there is a strong feeling of vindication. i eventually got married and have been rocking it for 18 years in a healthy relationship. shes still unmarried in her 40s.
sad thing is, she would have been my one and done. first and last. coulda loved her my whole life.
@@user82938well the real question is will they know the backstory
@@dezmodiumthat's the long game my friend you figured it out 😂
YES. It will hit her when she least expects it. The time thing is spot on too it takes time to get over these things
"this guys so toast it's insane" true foreshadowing from Stav. what a nightmare.
He's so rarely that genuine so you know this guy is done
The fact Stavvy mentioned toast without licking his lips. You know our boy is serious lmao
She cheated a YEAR into the marriage. Nah very, she has some self worth issues. End that shit immediately.
Together for 5 years before they got married, you think this is the first time? She just got away with it until now.
@@gallusdomesticus5478eh could go either way… maybe finally getting the security made her cocky that she could get away with it
@@gallusdomesticus5478 This. I HIGHLY doubt this was the first time.
"We're gonna try to work through it" noooooo buddy noooooooo! Get out now
He’s a good man for trying to work through it if it was a one night fling. He’s a smart man for going through her phone and figuring out the whole story.
3 options:
1. Divorce lawyer and therapy. Go grey rock with the wife and execute your exit plan to move on with your life.
2. Open relationship. She doesn't get a choice. She smashed door open and she gets no say on boundaries or if it gets closed. She doesn't get to ask where you stayed last night or who is the girl texting you. When you find the right girl, leave the wife for the one who wants exclusivity with you and divorce then.
3. Be a loser who's wife walks all over him and neglects him for another man. Let it eat you alive inside until it breaks you as a person and rots you to the core.
I don't recommend #3.
2 just leads to 1 with extra bullshit imo, she should not be allowed into his life a single day more. Let learn start spending money on takeout ASAP
1 is the option - definitely get a lawyer and put it on wax. GET THE SHERIFF.
2 also never works for the guy unless he's also got in insane shape as if he somehow knew this was going to happen and wanted it to happen. The guy always let's himself go in the relationship and never gets any when the relationship opens.
2 is a BAD option. Cheaters often suggest this option themselves bc it eases their guilt (if that’s an emotion they’re even capable of) but more importantly they can say, “well you slept with so and so!” The fact it’s completely different doesn’t matter. You’ve lost your leverage on the moral high ground…
This is what happens when a person is neglected as a child, they entertain allowing something like this.
Or their parents had a healthy relationship through genuine hardship and they misconstrue this as the same
Another point. The caller should NOT move out before talking to a lawyer. By moving out of the house, it shows that the wife has more ownership of it.
The currency of love is trust. The fact she lied about this means this can never work.
He can play music and get on stage, cook, is decently attractive, and seems to have some emotional sensitivity (even if a bit naive). He will be fine and probably eventually score with someone cool and worthy.
I feel so hard for this guy, you can hear how bad he's hurting. 😢
I wish nothing but the best for this guy.
Most visceral response from Stavvy in the history of the the show - homie was making the arthur fist😂
Lmao my ex boyfriend did this. My dudes gotta GTFO before she bails.
so funny that they can't look away from the screen like it's personal
"This can't wait til tomorrow"
Good guy Stavvy
Great advice as always Stavy. This is an impulse, narcissist who isn’t wife material. You will rebuild my friend.
I like how Stav sounds like Peter Griffin holding his hurt knee😂
"Get the sherrif" 😂
SAME. THING. Happened me. I love you both IS so crazy and hurtful. Married 12 years. I got to leave the marriage with my integrity intact and went on a wild streak. Hang in there.
To the guy on the phone. You seem like a wonderful human being. But this woman is taking advantage of that. My friend if you keep allowing this behaviour it will only get worse. The other thing is the more you allow, the less respect she will actually have for you...and she ll go with the other guy anyway. I guarantee she ll go with the other guy, it wont work out cos they barely know each other...and she ll come crawling back. And it ll continue...she ll cheat again. Because she has no respect for you. Take back some self respect and power and end this now. Because it will only get worse. You will get a woman who deserves you and who will make you truly happy. Because being honest my friend...you sound fucking beaten down. This womans treating you like shit. Please leave now..because it will only get harder. Best of luck.
Becoming a hater of all women is not necessary here. Cutting her off would be called self-respect. There ARE better women out there. We just need to screen them for character better and maintain self-respect within relationship, ESPECIALLY in marriage.
Being slightly misogynistic is important for developing self respect when it comes to dudes who have no respect for themselves in a relationship. When people say "misogynistic' nowadays, it rarely means "hatred of all women." It basically just means "any negative generalised opinion about women at all." Dudes that lack this kind of self respect tend to have too few of these opinions and the introduction of some of them can really help them be a more well rounded person. I know because i was one of them.
@@callanc3925 you can do this in the framework of "some people are going to suck, and women are people so some women are going to suck." you can also switch "women keep doing x" to "the shitty women i've had bad dates/interactions/relationships with keep going x." the benefit this has is that you learn to see shitty behaviors in isolation as what they are without needing to link them to something they're only related to in terms of how gender roles encourage/discourage certain expfressions of shittiness
If you read this caller then here's how you have to look at it because I know it's easy to say leave when you don't have the feelings that you have for this woman, it's a lot harder when you have that love there, you envisioned a whole life together and now it feels so damn hard to picture what your life will be like now it's over. There's often a part of us that wants to forgive, that feels like we can do something different and that person won't hurt us again. The way I see it though is that she broke a trust that is fundamental to any relationship working, if you can't trust what your wife tells you or what your wife is doing then the marriage can't work. She broke your trust when she cheated on you. She broke it again when she lied and said it was a one night stand. Each time she only told the truth when you had found it already for yourself, that's not the actions of someone who made a mistake and really regrets it. That's the actions of a woman that on some level maybe even just subconsciously that feels uncomfortable with the idea of spending the rest of her life with you, you're one year into a marriage and she is already cheating on you. These are all the things she did wrong and that's why you should leave. But if you were to stay... What would that relationship look like? Would you be able to trust her fully again? Feel comfortable with her going away? Would you be able to not be paranoid and controlling? Because these things will make the relationship miserable, even if you were to stay with her the relationship would never be the same again. It is a horrible feeling and I really sympathise for you, but the relationship you had with your wife is dead, you could, technically start a new one with her, but it is one of distrust and lies, and I really think you will be a lot better off without her in your life. If you do leave you need to really understand how bad what she did was, because there will come a time, when it doesn't work out with this new guy, that she comes back, tail between her legs, begging for forgiveness, that's when you'll need to be strong again.
💯 facts
the audacity to say i love you both god damn i would have started packing then and there
Yup
are you the caller?
@@ayushpadiyar8846she didn’t say that (not defending) but he said she “all but said” meaning whatever she said was enough for him to interpret it that way… of course with all of the other context that is pretty minute and irrelevant-but if it was the only part of why he’s feeling hurt would be a bit different.
Okay this story was WILD and also shocked to hear the guest was from the wilderness of... Halifax NS 😂 represent!!
This guy was definitely a Trailer Park Boy
Is he a standard-issue NS guy? He’s not what I imagine people from Nova Scotia being like.
@@michellewitt2071 since he's from halifax, kinda yeah. Really depends on the community. Folks from rural NS tend to be what people think of as the sterotype.
This bicycle has absolutely been cheating this whole time.
“Get a fresh REED for your Sousaphone”
Fuck, that triggered my dweeb ass so hard
💀
i hope this guy sees this and moves on with his life. best of luck to him
I want to give this guy a hug so badly. I hope he’s okay.
Nathan really sounds here like a mix of William Montgomery and Bill Burr
NO SERIOUSLY why would you say that!?
Looks like it too
nothing wrong with being head over heels over a woman and being all lovey dovey. it's okay to love hard and be vulnerable. that's one of life's true treasures is to completely vulnerable with your girl and giving her your all like she does for you. the thing is you also need enough self respect to not tolerate mistreatment. if you find out your girl is cheating on you, there's no going back. she wouldn't have been with another guy if she really loved you. don't waste your breathe trying to see what you can do to fix the relationship. the relationship was over the minute she chose another guy. there's plenty of beautiful and great women in the world who are great matches with you and will love you for who you are and won't fuck you over. i promise you. sometimes people fuck you over and you have to be able to move on to the next part of your chapter. that's life.
it's like drake said.. When a good thing goes bad it's not the end of the world, it's just the end of a world that you had with one girl.
Some notes on this as a 42 year old who broke up with a Dismissive Avoidant woman last year (because that's what this is, btw, dismissive avoidance). So first things first, cheating is almost always a sign of dismissive avoidance. That's the exacttttt type of person who just 'gets bored'. There's no gender involved in this as it's a function of upbringing*. When a dismissive breaks up with you the irony is that YOU'RE THE ONE WHO HAS TO GO NO CONTACT WITH THEM. Because Stavvy is right here, once they realize the grass isn't greener they will try to hoover you back up. You can not be there for that shit.
*Sidenote to anyone who is dismissive avoidant--it is curable. Look into DBT therapy or sensorimotor therapy.
TO THE GUY ON THE PHONE:
The time is now for damage control and rebuilding. She’s your wife, so make sure you can PROVE beyond a doubt she cheated. Do not let her get anything else from you. It’s lawyer time. Also, do not kid yourself - this is not longer a nice girl. She WILL get what she can.
Second, is that you HAVE to self improve now. If you sit around and complain, and drink, and never get better - she will, and you won’t, and it’ll kill you even worse.
You got this, but you gotta want it for yourself.
After
the guy called to help make up his mind whether he was gonna kill her or not
And got a resounding “do it” God bless him
@@ocdrums24 do em both
7:14 this part cracks me up every damn time..the pain and rage is so real.
Man I wish there were updates on some of these
They should do call backs have a segment for that
Thank you, this clip has saved me years of therapy! Lmao
this is my first time experiencing nathan and i could honestly listen to him yell all day
The "call the sheriff" got me 😂
This happened to my bf. His ex lied and said she was going to France with her friends for a week, but really she went to Germany to hook up with a guy. They were together like 9 years I think? He went to therapy after because he kept thinking he was crazy. (She was also BPD and went full Amber Heard on him a couple times. Broken bottles and everything.) Please seek therapy dude!! You're worth it to become the best version of yourself!
Also, I can hear someone thinking it now. "She needs the therapy!" Right, she does. But this isn't about her. Fuck that bitch, let her figure it out on her own. This is about you and bettering your life because you deserve it.
Also, youtube just tried to get me to think about my choice of words here. UA-cam, why must you be defending monsters like this woman. -_-
It's over dude.
Guaranteed his wife will say it's his fault she cheated
Hahahaha!!! IM DYING! 😂😂 This is the best podcast ever! All facts spoken by Stav & crew.
Hilarious as usual and actually great advice. Never give a cheater another chance.
Stavs Andrew Tate comment is one of the greatest pieces of wisdom I’ve ever heard.
Expert advice.
Its so insanely true and goes for all "redpill" content. It really provides some of the other side to the world that is necessary for a balanced opinion/values system, but its so inherently unbalanced on its own that you cant really keep watching it for very long without becoming a total loser or psychopath.
Just went through something very similar to this, together 5yrs married just over 1 when I found out she was cheating. I say get everything you need to divorce and think of her as dead to you, the person you thought she was was isn’t who she really is. Block her on everything you have and focus on yourself! You won’t have to live with a guilty conscience rest of your life.
"You're at Arby's..." Bro this guy is so fucking funny why have I never heard of this guy 😭😂
"you gotta get OUTta this!"
I even understand for her perspective how she may feel in a way. You're in a long term committed relationship and you meet someone new and it feels good and you develop a crush on them. But being an adult is acknowledging that's a fleeting feeling and is in no way the same as what you have with a five year relationship. It's normal to have a crush on someone you just met, it's absolutely fucked to go through with it and fuck them and then lie about it.
Ouch. My boy needed this roast. We're with you brother, hit the gym and see you there.
People, NEVER give a cheater a second chance. Once they’ve stepped out on you, it’s no over. No bargaining, no bs, just gtfo as soon as you can. It’s simply not worth it.
This is brutal, also much respect for the monster and future appreciation
Sorry to say, fella.....you married the town bicycle. 😂
Genuinely the only way to retain any self respect out of this is if you end it and never take her back. It's over and you need to be the one to end things before she does to save any dignity at all. Good luck to bro
God damn, the "...you're out there, you're at Arby's..." like its where this kind of random, spontaneous love can happen just absolutely fucking killed me 😂
(Not taking away here that the wife is absolute trash)
Its soo so so hard at first to see the truth that this person actually sucks, but soldier on brother this is a massive life lesson that will change you forever
Get out before it gets even worse. Cause it will get worse, I’ve been through this and even more with the same person. It truly gets worse if you just assume she will stop, it just enables the behavior. It will take years to get over this.
I do not understand how little self respect some of these dudes have
It's typically kids who weren't valued and when someone shows you any type of affection, you can't imagine anyone else would be able to.
This isn't just a dude problem.
Kids with parents that don’t care about them in any non financial way
Finding a longterm partner can be really difficult for a lot of people, and some dread being alone so much that they’ll consider dealing with this garbage
@@BrofUJu Nah but its a lot easier to understand how women have such a lack of self respect
Get out brother and don’t look back. I’m so sorry. Good luck dude
Goddamn i really wish they actually called him back he needs to hear this asap
Being cheated on is almost as painful as asking someone to not interrupt the important thing, and then they do it three fucking times in a row.
Love the fact that us guys are all on board with this advice. Keep your head up brother, she ain't the one.
Just like myself, a woman who had men do this to me, I'm on a misandry bender right now. And no I don't hate all men, but I sure as hell ain't dating them anymore. The men that pull towards me and vise versa, it is toxic. So, I'm trying to find myself, figure out WHY the hell this is and figure it out later. No kids for me so it's all just center focused right now.
I know what this guy's feeling, and I just want him to know I get it, even as a woman. You need some time to think, brother, and just figure yourself out first before you even THINK about going into another relationship.
Man rest in peace to bro. ThaT IS CRAZY! I wish him healing and well being
5 years is bad but it could’ve been much worse. You could’ve thrown away 20 years before this happened. He’ll be fine
The Andrew Tate advice is legitimately good advice lmao. I feel for this dude, but you can tell he gets WALKED ON constantly. The fact that your first instinct after hearing that she cheated on you was "let's work through it" is fucking OUTLANDISH. Have some self respect, have a backbone, go to the gym 5 times a week, and never let this happen again.
Also, this woman will get hers, don't you worry about that.
Thats a fact. Really just consume any red pill content for a limited time. Once youve learnt the basics and start noticing things are repeating and turning into a "hate on women" segment, dip out and get on with your life.
“If you can’t choose between me and the second person then choose the second person cuz you don’t love me”
hope this guy has solid bros in his life to help him get through this and tell him to cut the shit when his wife inevitably begs for a second chance. goddamn dude.
Doubtful since he called to leave a voicemail knowing it would be months before the answer appeared on UA-cam.
“This is like how chemotherapy is poison but it kills cancer” LMFAOOOOOO
Exactly what they are saying. EXCEPT also leave and take your stuff when she’s at work or gone….. I learned that from my ex lol
Stav sounds like a loud guy in an adult film for the first couple minutes of this “awwwwwwwwww fuck”
If this dude gets out of this, it’s just gonna happen again. He has that “please cheat on me”
Energy.
Cheating is ultimate betrayal. I couldnt give someone another chance because I could never fully trust them again, and thus, never truly forgive them. Which would ultimately be unfair for them. I've always felt this way about my friends too. I had a friend confide in me and tell me he had cheated on his wife. It completely changed my perspective on him. If he could betray her, the woman he married, how easy would it be for him to betray me? Loyalty matters. A persons character matters.
I used to listen to Loveline all the time when I was a kid. This is a great format and I hope Stav keeps at it.
“She’s buying you shirts” is a completely underrated comment
She thinks she's in love with the affair partner when in fact she just has a little school girl crush and is infatuated which will wear off in time. Then she'll be left in the dust (hopefully) by this guy and it'll be way too late.
Dude you can hear the distraught in this poor guys words. Buddy has class but, get out big dawg!
Dude, it's so brutal how someone could treat their partner so well, and then only to have that repaid with this level of betrayal, holy shit.
I kinda get why a lot of men have just checked-out from being a 'nice guy', it doesn't pay off, not in the short-term, and not in the long-term.
Went (and still going) through the exact same thing. Except with me, 9 months later, I’m still trying to make it work. We’re both active duty military and have two kids together, so splitting up complicates things, obviously. But I’d be lying if I said I’m only sticking around and trying for the kids. Love my wife, at the end of the day, ya know. This has completely changed me. Broken me. It’s wild hearing him describe what happened and how closely it parallels my situation.
LEAVE G. If anything it will set a good example for your kids on the standard they should set for lovers in their lives.
4:40 instead of andrew tate i send people to patrice o'neal 😭
“LISTEN TO FUTURE! LISTEN TO FUTURE!”
best advice
Gonna clip starvros various "ughs" and use them in a fighting game
Make her love being single even more.
We've all been there. Wondering if you're getting cheated on or if your sognificant other would cheat. But one thing is for sure, some of us make it VERY clear what the consequences of cheating are, and some of us do not.
So If you haven't made it clear folks, you have some homework to do. And if you're afraid to do that, it might be because your unconsciously allowing it.
Realistically its more important that he makes it clear to himself what the consequences are. One thing people mix up a lot is thinking boundaries are a way of controlling the other person. In reality, boundaries are for controlling your own reaction to things. If she wants to fuck around on you, you cant really stop her. But what you can do is instill in your value system that if someone cheats on you even once youre out for ever blocked number new address.
What she loves is the new guy and her home. Too bad that darn hubby is in the way.
No doubt. This is the scenario where you hear the “new couple” try to hire a hitman.
Don’t tolerate women like this. Leave them, without question.
you can do this man 🖤👑
Two words for this guy. Black Phillip.
dost thou wish to live....homosexually
God's honest truth right here. This guy has absolutely no clue how women work or how to interact with them, he needs some Patrice in his life.
I wonder what happened in the two months or so between him leaving the voicemail and him hearing Stav's response.
my ex of 6 years basically had another gf and they wrote letters to each other after she moved out of state but he was planning on visiting her eventually plus he was on feeld looking for fwbs
i love how everytime he reveals new information there’s a collective discomfort 😭😭😭😭😭
Thank you for these gems
He needs to call all the divorce lawyers in the area so she has no access to them because it would be a conflict of interest. He needs to strike first.
Whoever that guy was, I hope all goes well. Get out soon, just improve your life.
Become a better version of yourself and excel. Good luck out there