Oneyplays Telling Stories Compilation

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  • Опубліковано 19 січ 2023
  • Some of my personal favourite stories from the bois
    All credit goes to Oneyplays - @OneyPlays
  • Ігри

КОМЕНТАРІ • 123

  • @Chibblechabble
    @Chibblechabble Рік тому +1069

    That Super Sayan delivery driver put eye drops in their food.

    • @Roachdogjr6671
      @Roachdogjr6671 3 місяці тому +51

      No he put chocolate lax

    • @The_Blue_Otaku
      @The_Blue_Otaku 2 місяці тому +140

      Ether that or he somehow got liquid laxatives mixed into the pizza sauce

    • @leonelmartinez2486
      @leonelmartinez2486 2 місяці тому +99

      Turkish amphetamines

    • @adammiller7236
      @adammiller7236 2 місяці тому +80

      I reckon he bare arse farted on the pie. That's why is was smashed

    • @adammiller7236
      @adammiller7236 2 місяці тому +18

      I reckon he bare arse farted on the pie. That's why is was smashed

  • @barcacarthago5972
    @barcacarthago5972 2 місяці тому +820

    The story of Lyle become a Herobrine-esque Minecraft cryptid is one of my favorites of his

  • @ieatmice751
    @ieatmice751 2 місяці тому +557

    The crazy thing is that Chris has actually worked with Jack Black

    • @gusgus0070
      @gusgus0070 2 місяці тому +142

      It’s a long con to get him to perform at Wexford

    • @gabrieldarcy9067
      @gabrieldarcy9067 2 місяці тому +47

      The crazy thing is that Jack Black got to work with THE Chris O'Neil

    • @grimble4564
      @grimble4564 2 місяці тому +48

      ​@@gusgus0070I love the idea that Chris' entire channel and moving to America was motivated purely by spite and desperation to befriend Jack Black

    • @SuperCaleb360
      @SuperCaleb360 2 місяці тому +29

      ​@grimble4564 no you have it wrong. Jack Black made a name for himself and kept getting Video Game gigs like Brutal Legend and the Mario Movie in hopes that OneyNG would collaborate with him on a music video.

  • @mrvaporiz
    @mrvaporiz 2 місяці тому +705

    If I was Tomar's principal and this kid told me "You'll get your comeuppance when I SLIME you!" I wouldn't be able to sleep at night, like I would have no idea what he was up to.

    • @s3dchr
      @s3dchr 2 місяці тому +10

      SLIME, ANYONE?!

    • @Rose-ew7bv
      @Rose-ew7bv 2 місяці тому +9

      This little kid is Drake apparently

    • @Nicknam316
      @Nicknam316 4 дні тому +1

      This is a really scary thought, especially because this is Tomar where talking about...

  • @JuanitoK556
    @JuanitoK556 2 місяці тому +207

    that first story was legit one of the funniest stories ive ever heard from these guys

    • @Trynt33
      @Trynt33 Місяць тому +48

      I love how genuinely insane it gets. The part about the cops just letting her go despite being hammered was too real, along with the dog held hostage. If it wasn't for them being in LA I'd assume this was in Florida.

    • @Brams2777
      @Brams2777 26 днів тому

      MILLONARIOS REFERENCIA

  • @ThatBugBehindYou
    @ThatBugBehindYou 2 місяці тому +258

    The bugs that appeared in Cory's room continue to be the most high stakes story ever told by any member of the group.

    • @Agentshadling
      @Agentshadling 2 місяці тому +20

      I wish we could get them all together one last time and just have them go over every story that made it on oneyplays and just go through each person's perspective

    • @sexygirlmax2019
      @sexygirlmax2019 Місяць тому +2

      the image of her just gesturing wildly to the literal maggots all over the counters is wonderful
      i lived in a shitty alcoholic truck drivers trailer, father in law refused to take care of house and take trash out, and a bunch of house flies came in and laid eggs all over the food so there were actual maggots crawling all over the rolling trash can that the trucks collect, and they were in the inside trash as well. Its HORRIBLE.

    • @FrogWalrus
      @FrogWalrus Місяць тому +1

      That’d be cool, it looks like they were playing cover for her on the Sleepycabin podcast, jokingly blaming each other, probably to try and keep the peace.

  • @dontsleeponyourstomach
    @dontsleeponyourstomach 2 місяці тому +257

    Lyles Cherokee patty sounds like the brown goblin

  • @Mtv-get-off-thee-air
    @Mtv-get-off-thee-air 2 місяці тому +171

    Lyles first story sounds like a coen brothers movie

  • @Charmanderfan2002
    @Charmanderfan2002 Рік тому +321

    The story around 30:00 is one of my favorites
    Sonic goes to the real world dude

    • @mrvaporiz
      @mrvaporiz 2 місяці тому +5

      That's Eggman

  • @thatBigfuu
    @thatBigfuu Місяць тому +22

    The reason Zach didn’t get threatened by the weird guy instead of Chris , Is because Zach is a handsome goblin .

  • @TheThreatenedSwan
    @TheThreatenedSwan 2 місяці тому +77

    Then Tomar said "Hello I am Tomar. Have you heard of Death of a Salesman 2?" and sucked out his life essence until he was a withered husk

  • @funkymonkey2k425
    @funkymonkey2k425 Рік тому +156

    25:21 i have a feeling the friend in question is cory

    • @soapyrainmaker5367
      @soapyrainmaker5367 Рік тому +13

      i hope it is

    • @roachdoggjr.1582
      @roachdoggjr.1582 Рік тому +73

      I think they mentioned another time that it was Adam.

    • @kinefish1674
      @kinefish1674 3 місяці тому +66

      @@soapyrainmaker5367with how open Cory is about his degeneracy I doubt that he wouldn’t want people knowing about it, he’d probably tell that story himself

    • @reidepperson8534
      @reidepperson8534 2 місяці тому

      @@roachdoggjr.1582for real is it in another video

  • @TheThreatenedSwan
    @TheThreatenedSwan 2 місяці тому +81

    Lyle loves living like a crack head

    • @fendviyo
      @fendviyo 2 місяці тому +18

      Dude was living in a basement belting rats to death living like a king💪😤

    • @pickedceasar1216
      @pickedceasar1216 Місяць тому

      @@fendviyo for like half a decade or more 😂😂

  • @sumguy3687
    @sumguy3687 2 місяці тому +79

    20:36
    There is some kinda soap, pizza places use to clean pizza trays.
    & if it isnt washed off right, it gives you mega wet poops.

    • @slingshotnerd
      @slingshotnerd 2 місяці тому +9

      Yeah it’s called generic dish soap…

    • @Trynt33
      @Trynt33 Місяць тому

      @@slingshotnerd It's called Dawn dish soap. Buy a bottle today and save the Wonder Pets from pollution

    • @Argov82
      @Argov82 Місяць тому +1

      What industrial degreaser? If you consume that you will get more than wet poops lol

    • @dragondojima
      @dragondojima 21 день тому

      think the sociopath just put laxitives in it

  • @Roach_Dogg_JR
    @Roach_Dogg_JR 2 місяці тому +31

    If the water in London was 20 percent cocaine, there would be some serious problems lmao.

  • @SuperCaleb360
    @SuperCaleb360 2 місяці тому +34

    10:50 Chris would never have guessed back then he'd eventually collaborate with Jack Black

  • @mistamemewide
    @mistamemewide Місяць тому +9

    I firmly believe that all of their lives are simply just sitcoms. Like the Pizza Guy Bit was actually a Seinfeld bit.

  • @organicketchup5171
    @organicketchup5171 Рік тому +100

    My favourite story is the one of the man

  • @sbraypaynt
    @sbraypaynt Місяць тому +7

    Horrible roommate or not the idea of Cory going full male shit fit tantrum and SMASHING MOTHS out of rage against a wall is so goddamn funny

  • @boojersey13
    @boojersey13 Рік тому +81

    Scratches my happy trail yessssssssssss new upload

  • @malsocio
    @malsocio Місяць тому +5

    the giuseppe story is fascinating

  • @DCGMatthew1
    @DCGMatthew1 Рік тому +74

    Erm, that's really cool.

  • @bhgameman
    @bhgameman Місяць тому +6

    Its so cool that Chris worked with Jack Black after his dad basically shit on his friends for how impossible getting him to come out was.

  • @thestonedwitch
    @thestonedwitch Місяць тому +16

    I wonder what Chris’ dad thinks about him making a video with Jack Black

  • @commenteroftruth9790
    @commenteroftruth9790 2 місяці тому +18

    ah these funny fellers bring a joy to the chaos

  • @unknown6390
    @unknown6390 2 місяці тому +21

    Dude at 23:58 this has to be Adam 😂

  • @leodepew5696
    @leodepew5696 Місяць тому +2

    I love how Niall’s Chris impression is just an Irish Kermit the Frog

  • @fireemblemistrash75
    @fireemblemistrash75 Місяць тому +5

    Im surprised no one thought to report the delivery driver

  • @Amateur_Ambiance
    @Amateur_Ambiance 2 місяці тому +15

    You can drip some eye drops or some shit into food and it’ll make one diaretic.

  • @yourneighbor6152
    @yourneighbor6152 Місяць тому +4

    100% they should have name and shamed that pizza place.

    • @Inabin
      @Inabin Місяць тому +8

      Well they clearly suspected the Grubhub driver and not the pizza place

  • @ARuiz-eu3hk
    @ARuiz-eu3hk 2 місяці тому +28

    Man the double standard is real on the first story. Jesus.

    • @Trynt33
      @Trynt33 Місяць тому +13

      The fact they let her go despite being hammered felt so real. I've had neighbors like this, living in cities is horrible

  • @darkdave1998
    @darkdave1998 7 днів тому

    Man old school Minecraft was wild. Lyle talking about having to find the actual IPs of specific servers brings back memories

  • @ilikedoom2707
    @ilikedoom2707 29 днів тому +2

    11:25 fun fact, my school which is in the middle of nowhere in NJ actually won one of those sweepstakes in 2001 so they would go somewhere random like that

  • @cisrot
    @cisrot Місяць тому +3

    I’m convinced that Chris actually grew up in Royston Vasey

  • @JimMilton-ej6zi
    @JimMilton-ej6zi 7 днів тому +1

    "I'm not a turd about that kind of thing, i was willing to give him more" he says about the guy that poisoned his pizza lol, i think if someone is even just verbally abusive to you, that's deserving of no tip, because they're no longer there to deliver you food, they're there to shake you down for money.

  • @brickowls7886
    @brickowls7886 Рік тому +19

    good edit as always, baefy

  • @tahutoa
    @tahutoa 2 місяці тому +11

    31:20 i bet it's because Chris was the bigger guy there

  • @thatfunkyduck
    @thatfunkyduck 2 місяці тому +8

    Does anyone know off of which old movie the thumbnail is based?

  • @calor023
    @calor023 Місяць тому

    thank god lyle stories are getting attention

  • @derekarneecher3949
    @derekarneecher3949 Місяць тому +1

    1st story is litteraly me 😂

  • @Assortment54321
    @Assortment54321 5 днів тому

    In regards to the first story: my mom would drink herself to psychosis growing up. It was dreadful.

  • @JimMilton-ej6zi
    @JimMilton-ej6zi 7 днів тому

    16:50 dingdongs tipping story is always insane to me, because at no point should getting a low tip or even 0 tip justifies being rude to a customer, you just say "thank you have a good day" and move on, but apparently wherever dingdong lives you have to tip at least 200% or else you're a horrible person.

    • @culture4519
      @culture4519 4 дні тому

      That guy sounds like an unhinged weirdo like if you don’t like the job don’t fucking do it nothing justifies messing with someone’s food nevermind he actually tipped

    • @JimMilton-ej6zi
      @JimMilton-ej6zi 4 дні тому

      @@culture4519 yeah he was, and even though he was a bad guy clearly deserving of no tip, dingdong still had to go out and say "i tip guys i'm not a turd" as if tipping a guy like that is anything but crazy.

  • @bettya.k.abetty8259
    @bettya.k.abetty8259 21 годину тому

    Chris and ding dong n Julian's encounter with the super saiyan Russian man is why I stopped ordering doordash or postmates. I started working from home a few years before the pandemic in 2017. I ordered Thai food from a local restaurant in my area of Southern California. It was beyond cold. I warmed it up and got the worst diahrrea I've ever experienced.

  • @darkdave1998
    @darkdave1998 7 днів тому

    Dude everyone on my school was using the PSP for pr0n, you'd see a bunch of kids crowded up around a PSP and they'd be a 80% chance of them being on red tube or something

  • @kizbo
    @kizbo 18 днів тому

    Regarding the first story… did nobody tell Lyle that Oneyplays is comedy-focused?

  • @jesusthebruh2144
    @jesusthebruh2144 Місяць тому

    Laxatives in the pizza?

  • @vogueinferno
    @vogueinferno 29 днів тому +1

    4:38

  • @August-dq1cj
    @August-dq1cj Місяць тому

    2:51 bro who is this boss Ron Swanson?

  • @Quindolin
    @Quindolin Місяць тому

    Which video is at 10:35?

  • @The_Barroth
    @The_Barroth Місяць тому

    Ok that’s concerning because I have a ornate box full of cat whiskers
    (The whiskers are found in the house when they naturally drop off the cats)
    It’s for an inside joke

    • @Moocow2003
      @Moocow2003 11 днів тому +1

      I like to imagine that the joke is just you and your friends standing around a box of cat whiskers, laughing hysterically whenever you flip the lid open

    • @The_Barroth
      @The_Barroth 11 днів тому

      @@Moocow2003 pretty much yeah. Been stockpiling them to put on sandwiches in secret (the old whisker sandwich joke)

  • @alexis2666
    @alexis2666 26 днів тому

    Giuseppe is a fucking grifter drifter.

  • @KingCeryn
    @KingCeryn 2 місяці тому +26

    When Lyle gets going I like to play “fast forward roulette,” to see how far I can go with him still telling the story.

    • @E_blanknamehere
      @E_blanknamehere 2 місяці тому +9

      What's wrong with lyle?

    • @KingCeryn
      @KingCeryn 2 місяці тому

      We've been asking that for awhile.@@E_blanknamehere

    • @slingshotnerd
      @slingshotnerd 2 місяці тому

      @@E_blanknameherenothing. This person is just another Lyle hating turd.

    • @Trynt33
      @Trynt33 Місяць тому +3

      That's usually how I am with Zach on repeated viewings, like "Oh boy, I sure love this shrill breathy British voice he ALWAYS pulls out." (At least Cherokee Patty is interesting)

    • @KingCeryn
      @KingCeryn Місяць тому +7

      @@Trynt33 Zack is 4 inches tall and has never hurt a fly, you take that back, NOW! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!

  • @joelikespotatoes8321
    @joelikespotatoes8321 Місяць тому +1

    Man that first story aint even funny I feel bad for him.

  • @chrisbeaumont4630
    @chrisbeaumont4630 Місяць тому +4

    I'm of the opinion that Ding Dong was being paranoid about the pizza guy. The delivery guy probably seemed off from a language barrier, the pizza being smashed up the first time was probably from a driving error. When I worked at Dominos, braking too hard or cornering hard could turn a pizza to a big pile of shit straight away.
    I think Ding Dong's fear of confrontation, the driver's communication issues from being ESL and digestive issues happening at bad timing, maybe from a mistake from the pizza shop not the driver, lead to all of this. I could be wrong of course, but nothing the pizza driver did sounded malicious as much as just issues with communication. I can't think of anything he could have done to the pizza to make people sick without causing an obvious nasty taste. It seems more likely the pizza shop didn't rotate/store their ingredients properly, or left traces of cleaning chemicals.
    Just my 2 cents guys please don't eat me alive just from giving my humble opinion!

    • @JimMilton-ej6zi
      @JimMilton-ej6zi 7 днів тому

      You can do things to poison people and it won't be detected if they don't go to the doctors. There's also the fact that the driver was known to grubhub specifically because he had so many issues with the customers meaning he was doing something wrong to cause it.
      Chances are the guy was an illegal and he didn't care about laws