Seeing this quote from St. Augustine was a game changer for me: “He who sins with the intention of repenting afterwards, is not a penitent, but a mocker of God.”
One thing that has been a great temptation to me is, when I start to give into it, then stop, the devil plays on that. He says, "you've already started sin, you might as well finish." And, sometimes, I do fall for that lie. 1st Thessalonians 2:12 "we exhorted each one of you and encouraged you and charged you to walk in a manner worthy of God, who calls you into his own kingdom and glory." We are called, both by the Lord, and our brothers and sisters in Christ, into the glorious Kingdom of God. He leads us to more and calls us higher. Though we may start to sin and stop, we can continue to not sin after that. God will honor us obeying that conviction and it will be easier to stay pure, than if we go farther into that canyon of sin. This is our joy, family, as we work out our salvation. God is good! 🙌
“For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war after the flesh: (for the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds;) casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ; and having in a readiness to revenge all disobedience, when your obedience is fulfilled.” 2 Corinthians 10:3-6 KJV
Temptations/Lies I’ve received: 1: “You’re already so stressed out and overwhelmed, here, porn can help give you comfort and relief.” 2: Your struggle with lust and porn isn’t that bad, you don’t need to work so hard to recover.” 3: Even God doesn’t love you, that’s why he permitted to let you suffer alone with these addictions and lack of virtuous friendships, you might as well act out and spend time with us” (porn)+(demons) 4: “Give up living for God and for His Kingdom, you’re already fallen so many times.” 5: “Come and sin. You know you want to. You’re already attached.”
"Just take a quick glance. You're strong enough to resist. You've been so good for the last x number of weeks. You're cured! Just a quick look for curiosity's sake. You're not doing anything wrong, it's just a little looksie." *FROM THE PITS OF HELL!!!*
I remember having "a little looksie," and to my pleasant surprise I found it boring 😃 Then went on to spend/waste time on wholesome car review videos or something. I'm so grateful for that realization. I wish it for others too, that it becomes just plain boring, simply "meh, ain't nobody got time for that."
I've had that issue, too. I have to learn that it's not a good remedy, and that "No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it." 1 Cor. 10:13
I still am battling urges as well. While I haven't looked at porn for about 3 months now, i've still slipped up twice in the masturbation department. while i'm still not free of my temptations one thing that has helped me a lot outside of simply working on strengthening my faith, is fasting. i don't know how well typical intermittent fasting would help, I have found that abstaining from food for 2 days a week has been really helpful. it's not as difficult as you'd think either. if you don't want to do that tho, any time you're experiencing the urge you could just deny yourself any amount of food until the urge goes away.
The feeling gets so overwhelming it's like I disappear. First the thought comes and I usually I try to tell myself "No, don't do that, focus on something else" but then sometime later it comes back again but stronger, and the cycle repeats until it comes back in a wave so strong that I immediately act on it. I even might be thinking about how or why I shouldn't be doing that, that I'm breaking people's trust, but it's just happening. Not to say that I somehow am not culpable, but I often feel lost in this. Even after a short time of abstinence like a week, I start to relax or become arrogant.
That’s awesome Matt👍🏼. I felt horrible, embarrassed, just sick, confessing the same sin the following month, and asked Fr what am I to do? Then he questioned me, did I view, read, or converse with this in any way that would bring it about? No, I woke up from my sleep, I said, he then continued to counsel me. Even after absolution, which I am grateful for, and penance prayers, it just bothered me that I caved into sin. Now, it’s no no no, thanks, and a Hail Mary, My good Mother will help me. ✝️❤️🔥🙏
I’m lazy and wanted to post the temptations and responses here for quick reference both for myself and others. Cheers! 1.) when the demon of lust says I’m only looking surely it’s not only permissible but praise worthy to appreciate Gods creation Response: Matt 5:28 But I say to you that everyone that looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 2.) when the demon of lust surely God would not want you to endure suffering like this. James 1:12 blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life which gos has promised to those who love him 3.) it’s not technically porn and I don’t want to fall into the trap of being a prude James 1:14-15 but each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. Then desire when it is conceived gives birth to sin and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death. 4.) how can this be wrong when it feels so right? Proverbs 14:12 There is a way that seems right to man but it’s end is the way to death. 5.) nobody has to find out and the lord has more important things to worry about than our sex life Response: ecclesiasticus 23:18-19 (??? Protestant here, this isn’t in my Bible :D) 6.) just fantasize a little, there’s nothing wrong with that. Proverbs 4:23 keep your heart with all vigilance for from it flows the spring of life. 7.) you’ve already sinned grievously, one more time before confession won’t hurt. Do you not know that Gods kindness is what leads you towards repentance, but by your hard and impenitent heart you are stori by up wrath for yourself on the day wrath when Gods righteous judgement will be revealed.
Great write up. I will add The Bible is one book put together by the Catholic Church. Therefore that Church being The One True Church is the only one with the authority to distribute or translate The Bible. Protestants took away. If you argue and say The Catholic Church added to The Bible, you would be right. They put The Bible together originally.
Thanks Matt for your ministry! i've been living the basic phone life and it has helped me avoid temptation, and financial irresponsibility. I will always think of my marriage vows whenever evil whispers. A sacrament from God is always worth protecting!
I appreciate the information Matt Fradd. It is really hard to stop looking at porn and masturbation. I give in to porn when I know I have a couple of days off to recover from the hellish feelings I have
Some temptations I receive: 1. "All you have to do is go to confession. You might as well do it." Response: "Working together, then, we appeal to you not to receive the grace of God in vain." 2 Corinthians 6:1 I think this particular passage from Romans is better though: "What then shall we say? Shall we persist in sin that grace may abound? Of course not! How can we who died to sin yet live in it? Or are you unaware that we who were baptized in Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? We were indeed buried with him through baptism into death, so that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might live in newness of life." Romans 6:1-4
I never really considered that "numbing out" on innocuous content still prepares us to fall. I always considered that I am distracting myself in a better way, even though it has never worked...
It's always worst Sunday night/Monday morning facing the monotony of the new week in an unfulfilling desk job. Sadly, I've gotten to the point that my justification is simply "what's one more time, I'll just go to Reconciliation again", presuming and abusing God's mercy.
My lust demon's quotes (very personal, they hurt me all the time and make me wonder): "All your peers talk about doing it all the time with no shame, so why should you be different? Why should you be a prude?" "Humans can set their mind to quitting the sin but they're still gonna eventually fall again anyways since they're so powerless against it. It's futile." "Think about the rest of your miserable life suppressing yourself from doing it. Is that what you want?" "It's a particular pleasure that cannot be replaced by anything else." "Why does everyone get to enjoy themselves while you're suffering like this?" "Think about the times where you were still new to it and didn't know any better. Don't you just wish it happened again?" "They call it mature content because it's for mature people. Only children were restricted from seeing that stuff. You've grown up now, if you stop yourself from seeing it you're still a child." "You have no chance at getting a girlfriend anyways since you don't deserve one nor are you able to start and maintain that relationship, so you might as well fantasize. Men are lonelier than ever nowadays." "Men are all perverts whether they like it or not and everyone in this generation is degenerate anyways, there's no use hiding it." "You didn't choose to have a high male sex drive and that distracting thing in your pants. It's not fair, so why should you be suppressing it?" "Isn't the whole reason that wet dreams exist to naturally expel excess seed? How would doing it manually be any different, doesn't that mean it's a natural thing your body needs?" "Even in a church school when the biology and PSCD teacher are teaching Sex Ed they treat casual sex and masturbation like it's nothing. Some teachers even laugh at the students' dirty jokes. Where are people's morals anymore? It's society's fault that you got here, not yours." "Isn't that fictional character hot/cute? Who cares if it's not real, start fantasizing and searching for that type of content which the internet has plenty of."
What I've had success with imagining something absolutely disgusting when I have an intrusive lustful thought. I think of it as classical conditioning for whatever is sending the thought to my mind. I look at it like it's my subconcious or unconcious mind sending these thoughts up into my imagination as an ingrained reaction/coping mechanism I've developed through life. So I'm retraining those parts of my mind through negative association. So when those thoughts randomly pop in then I force myself to think about something that makes me cringe. So those parts of my mind know that when they send those thoughts they will no longer be rewarded but they will be punished. For example my goto thought is a close up of a sharp scalpel cutting into my brain and the blood and goo flowing out, I know it's terrible, but it has to be terrible to work. After awhile the thoughts do stop coming. I'm 32, started looking at porn when I was 11. I haven't looked at porn in 8 months.
One thing ive noticed is starting off small and progressively going more and more. Like going from “its jist fantasy” into watching horrible things. A scripture verse that i use is 1st Corinthians 6:11 because it reminds me that in Christ theres hope for change
This one is for after someone falls and feels beating themselves up because you keep falling: "No temptation has overtaken that is not common to man. God is faithful and will not let you be tempted beyond your strength, but with temptation will also provide a way of escape, that you may be able to endure it." -1 Corinthians 10:13 This has helped me realize that I am not alone in my struggles and that God allows us to experience temptations as a way for us to choose to love God. And he loves us so much that when we do experience temptation he will give us a way to fight and conquer that temptation.
Hello Matt, here comes a good one! I was happily married for 48 years to a beautiful lady sadly she passed in 2018. Since then I have found another young lady (74 years old). This woman was totally different than my wife but possessed all the beautiful qualities that she had. My dilemma is this, we both raised our families as Christians she also was married for 48 years. we are too lonely people who have lost their spouses and we I thinking that the good Lord knowing that there is no lust involved, because of finances it is an impossibility of us getting married although we would do that in a heartbeat. I do live with her now but we are both well aware of biblical teaching. I should say I am Catholic and still attend church. We really love each other and do find it very difficult trying to rectify our situation and knowing that we are living possibly in sin.
dear sir, if you allow me as a rather young man, why not do marriage? it's free of charge as it's a sacrament. i've done it to canonize my natural marriage. they charged only a very little for the additionals (it's called stole-fee here), about 4-5 litre gasoline worth of money, and it even included a wedding gift. if it still is not applicable for you, there is a canon, if i am not mistaken, which permits cohabitation for elderly man and woman who don't do marriage life in its entirety, just like brother and sister. don't remember the exact canon unfortunately though.
Could you maybe afford to just get together with your families at your local church for a small marriage ceremony with your local priest? Or maybe just you and your wife-to-be? It doesn't have to be an extravagant ceremony, does it? I mean, I guess my point is, if you love this woman, and you want to marry her, I think you should start exploring any avenue you could possibly have to ensure you're not living in sin.
It always catches me of late in the morning just before I wake up. I'm too tired to mentally focus and fight back. The temptation comes and with assistance of feeling anxious I give in. Lately I haven't used porn as often to do the deed. I have trouble getting past the 5-7 day period
A Big One I always get is "You deserve to feel good, especially after all that work. Treat yourself" or "Dont deprive yourself" A lot of times we as men especially need to watch our stress levels. What are you adding to your plate or to-do list that is unnecessary? Keep in Mind Philippians 4:19 "And My God Shall Supply All Your Needs According to His Riches In Glory" What He has is better than anything the world flesh and devil can offer us
After 40 years of immersed in porn and sex addiction and depravity, I have made an attempt to change. My wife is my reason and my rock. I have curtailed the porn viewing and flirting for the last year. I have had a handful of episodes where I have looked. But its not the episodic all night and all day chatting and viewing porn that I was used to. I go to bed when my wife goes to bed so I am not on my own and better able to resist temptation. It's hard and can make you feel like you are going crazy. You have to have a reason to make a change. Something that is SO important in your life that you would die without it/her/him. Resist. It can be done.
Very good video. I think it was the second one (your response was James 1:12) was the one I experience the most. And then the other one that I still sometimes fall victim to is the "it's not technically porn" one.
For me, lately the enemy has been telling me something like, "It will feel nice." Or "It'll be fun." 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 and the previous 7 verses help me. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.
To give into vanity and to act out lust Matthew 5:28 thank you Surely God would not want you to endure suffering like this “Blessed is the man who has stood steadfast under trial, for when he has stood, he will receive the crown of life”
One of the most tempting lies I get told is "it feels so pleasurable". But I try to remember that God's image is what I'm looking at. God entrusted the institution of marriage as the greatest relationship between man and woman, not sexual degeneracy. Any sex outside of marriage is against God's image and wants for mankind.
Anytime I start with "it's JUST " I know I'm minimizing/rationalizing a behavior that will get me in trouble. It's just a text, it's just a glance, it's just admiration (lust!).
The most frequent temptation or lie I tell myself is that nobody is expected to be perfect, and the sin is already forgiven, which I get from 1 John 2:1-2, but then I read the rest of that passage and see my mistake. Of course no one is perfect, but that doesn’t mean we should presume on God’s good graces.
All good excellent sound advice, no issue with any of it but I have another related question. Ok so we are told as Christians and that it is normal ( nay good even)for you, as a single person, to look forward to and be excited about enjoying God’s gifts of sexual intimacy within marriage BUT that these good desires can quickly become sinful if we turn them into lust, or use them with the wrong person at the wrong time. Ok granted but that raises an interesting question I have never received a good answer to. We have all heard the standard answer about what separates a non sexual thought from a sinful one with that standard story about how we can't stop the birds flying over our heads but we can stop them building a next in our hair and yes that makes sense in a certain way we can all relate to. We can clearly dwell on something sexual for too long and let lust in BUT ... . This analogy like all analogys at some point fails and that is where I'd like some guidance. How can a single human being come to terms and control their sexual drive without ever ... Well I suppose for want of a better way of putting it... (Considering it, , thinking about it, examining it and what it is) . To bring it to a practical issue. Sexual desire for a prospective marital partner IS a fundamental thing that must be 'considered' but there does not seem to be any way of engaging with a sexual thought even towards a legitimate fiance before marriage that within one nano second will turn into lust because to think sexualy about another person outside the constraints of marriage ( and actually married ) is a sin even if you intend 100 % to be married as until the marriage ceremony has taken place you cannot call that other person truly ' yours ' . We all start out as sexual beings as teens when sexual thoughts first appear but how else can we possibly have any idea or make sense of these sexual thoughts and drives without actually experiencing them, engaging with them in some way ( but any attempt to honestly experience them will obviously overwhelm anybody in a nanosecond) it seems a genuinely impossible task. This is why I can't make sense of the sentence I opened with above about ' a healthy sexual drive in single people ' , I'd like some honest and hopefully insightful responses. Please don't reply with stuff I've read a million times before , such as for example ' prayer ' ( I believe in prayer but I've found all it can do it help stop any sexual thoughts and while that is helpful for a time it doesn't allow space for these so called legitimate sexual feeling that would allow one to consider and look forward to legitimate sexuality in its proper context, and does not help with this idea if incorporating a healthy sexuality and desire as a single person, it just removes it for a time ) or Please don't reply with some explanation of how love and lust differ ( I understand that but as some point if I may be frank ... Love by itself does not make blood flow into the nether regions so sexual desire in all it's raw form is still relevant ) so what I'm really hoping for is some different take or explanation from a Christian perspective to help me make sense of and reconcile this idea . Really hoping someone has something to say on this I've never heard before. Just a point of information, this is not written by someone looking for an out , I fully except all Christuan doctrine and teaching on this, (no If's no but's ) and realise it's something one must suffer through and bear , however I think I'd be more at peace if teaching was ' sexual thoughts or feelings must never be entertained in any shape or form unless already married ' but that's not what is taught and I'm somehow supposed to be able to be excited about enjoying god's gift of sex within marriage now without ever somehow dealing with it or coming to terms with it. ????
Do not overthink this matter. Try to live a catholic life, but do not become obsessed with the sin of Lust. There are much worse ones to be very careful about. To NEVER look at anyone with ANY hint of lust is humanly impossible, despite what anyone might ever tell you. Relax and live your life with Christ.
@@tomlabooks3263 Thanks for the reply, I hear what you are saying and have thought that too but what I'm really asking is " what is this single person healthy sexuality/ being we are told to develop and enjoy while single without engaging with the topic in the mental realm and feeling it in the body. What is that ??? Is it just fanciful words or is there something more to it ? Without some answer on this I am left thinking of that old phrase ' created sick and commanded to be well ' and I'm not comfortable with that phrase as a Catholic obviously
@@adventureinallthings Maybe Dietrich von Hildebrand has writings about that, he's a Catholic philosopher who wrote a book called In Defense of Purity and some other books, and they influenced Pope St. John Paul II's later writings like theology of the human body, writings on love, and so on.
Try to love them as God loves them. Let that love dominate and preoccupy your mind. Praise God in heart and mind for the gift of this woman. It will quench the more human urges. We as humans have the awesome gift and chance to choose and fight to be holy. Even the angels in heaven don't have that and why the saints are held into such high esteem. love and obey God with all our heart, strength, and might, and to love your neighbor ( your girl especially) the same way. Once united in marriage of course sex is permissible as a given of self. When it happens say during the night , it feels so much more special. Better than when cheapening it and horn-dogging on your wife like a teenager. I feel if you truly love the person and pray and ask for grace to be chaste and respectful to love as a husband, and to love her as her heavenly father and earthly father would want...well then u are more than half way there. May God bless you. PEACE
6:20 Reminds me of this one meme showing the expanses of the universe and all of God's creation. Then it shows God (or Jesus, can't recall) holding the earth in His hands and saying "plz don't masturbate". I think the idea was to mock the sentiment at this point in the clip about how, for as big as the universe is and all that God has created, is masturbation really his biggest concern?
Ummm they both want to control our lives tho. God wants us to live his ways and Satan wants us to live his ways. The true difference is God ways are Good and better for us where Satan ways are evil and self destructive
@@gameover9390 God does not WANT anything, he does not NEED anything. The only thing that he WANTS is for US to be saved and to know Truth. He invites us to open our hearts to Him, He is OUT there knocking. Those who open, He will enter and dine with them and they with Him
I started watching pornography again shortly after my wife had our first child. My rationale was “my only role is to be there for her, the last thing that she needs to think about is my sexual desires. Therefore, if I watch porn, I can ensure that I take my sexual desire out of the equation. Watching porn is therefore good”. My kid is now one and I am nearly over it, but still struggle.
Quoting Scripture is probably the best way of combating temptation here's 2 other great ideas Pray as many Hail Marys, Our Fathers, Jesus Prayers and other Scripted prayers as you can. the more internalized the better and from there you can move into other forms of prayer The other is to mock the evil one. Laugh at him, revile him, make fun of him, call him ridiculous because he is! This is a sad pathetic creature who doesn't seem to know that he's beaten. A creature who actually thought he could cause God to sin while he was in the flesh. A creature who uses his power to go after the One who gave him that power to begin with. St. Thomas More once said "The devil...the proud spirit...cannot endure to be mocked.” Martin Luther echoed something similar. If you can get those two men to agree on theology it's probably pretty sound. As Matt Walsh has pointed out, the devil stands tall and proud, but he stands on stilts which can easily be kicked to bring him down to your level.
@@BlessedBeJESUSCHRIST The "Hail Mary" is not a form of worship. It's just a petition to Mary to pray for us. Also, the entire prayer is rooted in scripture. 1. "Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with you" is almost a direct quotation from Luke 1:28. 2. "Blessed art thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus" is a direct quotation from Luke 1:42. 3. "Holy Mary, mother of God," is saying that Mary was set apart by God to be the mother of God. And Mary is the mother of God because: a). Jesus has two natures, a divine nature and a human nature, making Jesus one divine person, and, therefore, God. b). Mothers are people who carry and give birth to human persons. c). Since Mary carried and gave birth to Jesus that makes Mary the mother of Jesus. d). And since Mary is the mother of Jesus, and Jesus is fully God, this means that Mary carried and gave birth to God. e). And since Mary carried and gave birth to God, she is the mother of God. 4. "Pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen." This final sentence is a petition for Mary to pray for us to Jesus Christ, our Lord, and Savior. We say this b/c as Catholics we believe that the bonds between Christians don't pass away after death. We believe that through God's power and grace, we can not only ask the saints on Earth to pray for us, but we can also ask the Saints in Heaven to pray for us. The topic of the Saints is more complicated. So I recommend that if you have any questions you go to the Catholic Answers website and type in "saints." Tons of articles will come up explaining the historical and scriptural roots of this practice. May God bless you, and may the peace of Christ be with you always!
Jesus spoke to the Jews (who were trying him in order to charge him) again, saying: -I am going away. You will look for Me but you will die in your sins. Where I am going, you cannot come. John 8:21 You can tell the same thing to the thoughts that are trying you, directly referring to them.
Seeing this quote from St. Augustine was a game changer for me: “He who sins with the intention of repenting afterwards, is not a penitent, but a mocker of God.”
One thing that has been a great temptation to me is, when I start to give into it, then stop, the devil plays on that. He says, "you've already started sin, you might as well finish." And, sometimes, I do fall for that lie.
1st Thessalonians 2:12
"we exhorted each one of you and encouraged you and charged you to walk in a manner worthy of God, who calls you into his own kingdom and glory."
We are called, both by the Lord, and our brothers and sisters in Christ, into the glorious Kingdom of God. He leads us to more and calls us higher. Though we may start to sin and stop, we can continue to not sin after that. God will honor us obeying that conviction and it will be easier to stay pure, than if we go farther into that canyon of sin. This is our joy, family, as we work out our salvation. God is good! 🙌
“For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war after the flesh: (for the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds;) casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ; and having in a readiness to revenge all disobedience, when your obedience is fulfilled.”
2 Corinthians 10:3-6 KJV
Temptations/Lies I’ve received:
1: “You’re already so stressed out and overwhelmed, here, porn can help give you comfort and relief.”
2: Your struggle with lust and porn isn’t that bad, you don’t need to work so hard to recover.”
3: Even God doesn’t love you, that’s why he permitted to let you suffer alone with these addictions and lack of virtuous friendships, you might as well act out and spend time with us” (porn)+(demons)
4: “Give up living for God and for His Kingdom, you’re already fallen so many times.”
5: “Come and sin. You know you want to. You’re already attached.”
"Just take a quick glance. You're strong enough to resist. You've been so good for the last x number of weeks. You're cured! Just a quick look for curiosity's sake. You're not doing anything wrong, it's just a little looksie." *FROM THE PITS OF HELL!!!*
I remember having "a little looksie," and to my pleasant surprise I found it boring 😃
Then went on to spend/waste time on wholesome car review videos or something.
I'm so grateful for that realization.
I wish it for others too, that it becomes just plain boring, simply "meh, ain't nobody got time for that."
Lately, I have struggled with insomnia, which is making this fight more difficult than it already is. Please, pray for me!
I've had that issue, too. I have to learn that it's not a good remedy, and that "No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it." 1 Cor. 10:13
A verse I like when trying to sleep, 'Yes, my soul, find rest in God, my hope comes from Him.' Psalm 62:5
I still am battling urges as well. While I haven't looked at porn for about 3 months now, i've still slipped up twice in the masturbation department. while i'm still not free of my temptations one thing that has helped me a lot outside of simply working on strengthening my faith, is fasting. i don't know how well typical intermittent fasting would help, I have found that abstaining from food for 2 days a week has been really helpful. it's not as difficult as you'd think either. if you don't want to do that tho, any time you're experiencing the urge you could just deny yourself any amount of food until the urge goes away.
The feeling gets so overwhelming it's like I disappear. First the thought comes and I usually I try to tell myself "No, don't do that, focus on something else" but then sometime later it comes back again but stronger, and the cycle repeats until it comes back in a wave so strong that I immediately act on it. I even might be thinking about how or why I shouldn't be doing that, that I'm breaking people's trust, but it's just happening. Not to say that I somehow am not culpable, but I often feel lost in this. Even after a short time of abstinence like a week, I start to relax or become arrogant.
Yes, as an addict I can relate to that. I think the solution is to focus on your moods further upstream long before the urges arrive.
That’s awesome Matt👍🏼. I felt horrible, embarrassed, just sick, confessing the same sin the following month, and asked Fr what am I to do? Then he questioned me, did I view, read, or converse with this in any way that would bring it about? No, I woke up from my sleep, I said, he then continued to counsel me. Even after absolution, which I am grateful for, and penance prayers, it just bothered me that I caved into sin. Now, it’s no no no, thanks, and a Hail Mary, My good Mother will help me. ✝️❤️🔥🙏
I’m lazy and wanted to post the temptations and responses here for quick reference both for myself and others.
Cheers!
1.) when the demon of lust says I’m only looking surely it’s not only permissible but praise worthy to appreciate Gods creation
Response: Matt 5:28 But I say to you that everyone that looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
2.) when the demon of lust surely God would not want you to endure suffering like this.
James 1:12 blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life which gos has promised to those who love him
3.) it’s not technically porn and I don’t want to fall into the trap of being a prude
James 1:14-15 but each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. Then desire when it is conceived gives birth to sin and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death.
4.) how can this be wrong when it feels so right?
Proverbs 14:12 There is a way that seems right to man but it’s end is the way to death.
5.) nobody has to find out and the lord has more important things to worry about than our sex life
Response: ecclesiasticus 23:18-19 (??? Protestant here, this isn’t in my Bible :D)
6.) just fantasize a little, there’s nothing wrong with that.
Proverbs 4:23 keep your heart with all vigilance for from it flows the spring of life.
7.) you’ve already sinned grievously, one more time before confession won’t hurt.
Do you not know that Gods kindness is what leads you towards repentance, but by your hard and impenitent heart you are stori by up wrath for yourself on the day wrath when Gods righteous judgement will be revealed.
Great write up. I will add The Bible is one book put together by the Catholic Church. Therefore that Church being The One True Church is the only one with the authority to distribute or translate The Bible.
Protestants took away. If you argue and say The Catholic Church added to The Bible, you would be right. They put The Bible together originally.
Thanks Matt for your ministry! i've been living the basic phone life and it has helped me avoid temptation, and financial irresponsibility. I will always think of my marriage vows whenever evil whispers. A sacrament from God is always worth protecting!
I appreciate the information Matt Fradd. It is really hard to stop looking at porn and masturbation. I give in to porn when I know I have a couple of days off to recover from the hellish feelings I have
Thank you so much, Matt. We need this sort of brotherhood and sisterhood and friendship to help each other.
For me it may be: “You can’t stop.”
"The only way I could release the burden of temptation is by giving in to it, So the temptation may no longer bother me "
😂😂😂😂 I know it’s not meant to be funny but the way you put it.
A major one for me: “You’re already this tempted. It’s too late to turn back, you’ve ignited that fire, so just get it over with”
Amazing. Thank you.
Some temptations I receive:
1. "All you have to do is go to confession. You might as well do it."
Response: "Working together, then, we appeal to you not to receive the grace of God in vain." 2 Corinthians 6:1
I think this particular passage from Romans is better though:
"What then shall we say? Shall we persist in sin that grace may abound? Of course not! How can we who died to sin yet live in it? Or are you unaware that we who were baptized in Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? We were indeed buried with him through baptism into death, so that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might live in newness of life." Romans 6:1-4
I never really considered that "numbing out" on innocuous content still prepares us to fall. I always considered that I am distracting myself in a better way, even though it has never worked...
I usually fight it and then within a split second give in and then I’m all in and care is out the window
It's always worst Sunday night/Monday morning facing the monotony of the new week in an unfulfilling desk job. Sadly, I've gotten to the point that my justification is simply "what's one more time, I'll just go to Reconciliation again", presuming and abusing God's mercy.
My lust demon's quotes (very personal, they hurt me all the time and make me wonder):
"All your peers talk about doing it all the time with no shame, so why should you be different? Why should you be a prude?"
"Humans can set their mind to quitting the sin but they're still gonna eventually fall again anyways since they're so powerless against it. It's futile."
"Think about the rest of your miserable life suppressing yourself from doing it. Is that what you want?"
"It's a particular pleasure that cannot be replaced by anything else."
"Why does everyone get to enjoy themselves while you're suffering like this?"
"Think about the times where you were still new to it and didn't know any better. Don't you just wish it happened again?"
"They call it mature content because it's for mature people. Only children were restricted from seeing that stuff. You've grown up now, if you stop yourself from seeing it you're still a child."
"You have no chance at getting a girlfriend anyways since you don't deserve one nor are you able to start and maintain that relationship, so you might as well fantasize. Men are lonelier than ever nowadays."
"Men are all perverts whether they like it or not and everyone in this generation is degenerate anyways, there's no use hiding it."
"You didn't choose to have a high male sex drive and that distracting thing in your pants. It's not fair, so why should you be suppressing it?"
"Isn't the whole reason that wet dreams exist to naturally expel excess seed? How would doing it manually be any different, doesn't that mean it's a natural thing your body needs?"
"Even in a church school when the biology and PSCD teacher are teaching Sex Ed they treat casual sex and masturbation like it's nothing. Some teachers even laugh at the students' dirty jokes. Where are people's morals anymore? It's society's fault that you got here, not yours."
"Isn't that fictional character hot/cute? Who cares if it's not real, start fantasizing and searching for that type of content which the internet has plenty of."
What I've had success with imagining something absolutely disgusting when I have an intrusive lustful thought. I think of it as classical conditioning for whatever is sending the thought to my mind. I look at it like it's my subconcious or unconcious mind sending these thoughts up into my imagination as an ingrained reaction/coping mechanism I've developed through life. So I'm retraining those parts of my mind through negative association. So when those thoughts randomly pop in then I force myself to think about something that makes me cringe. So those parts of my mind know that when they send those thoughts they will no longer be rewarded but they will be punished. For example my goto thought is a close up of a sharp scalpel cutting into my brain and the blood and goo flowing out, I know it's terrible, but it has to be terrible to work. After awhile the thoughts do stop coming. I'm 32, started looking at porn when I was 11. I haven't looked at porn in 8 months.
One thing ive noticed is starting off small and progressively going more and more. Like going from “its jist fantasy” into watching horrible things. A scripture verse that i use is 1st Corinthians 6:11 because it reminds me that in Christ theres hope for change
I used to say "ýou dont do it like the other people so you are not guilty of it"
Thank you so much 😊
This one is for after someone falls and feels beating themselves up because you keep falling:
"No temptation has overtaken that is not common to man. God is faithful and will not let you be tempted beyond your strength, but with temptation will also provide a way of escape, that you may be able to endure it." -1 Corinthians 10:13
This has helped me realize that I am not alone in my struggles and that God allows us to experience temptations as a way for us to choose to love God. And he loves us so much that when we do experience temptation he will give us a way to fight and conquer that temptation.
Hello Matt, here comes a good one! I was happily married for 48 years to a beautiful lady sadly she passed in 2018. Since then I have found another young lady (74 years old). This woman was totally different than my wife but possessed all the beautiful qualities that she had. My dilemma is this, we both raised our families as Christians she also was married for 48 years. we are too lonely people who have lost their spouses and we I thinking that the good Lord knowing that there is no lust involved, because of finances it is an impossibility of us getting married although we would do that in a heartbeat. I do live with her now but we are both well aware of biblical teaching. I should say I am Catholic and still attend church. We really love each other and do find it very difficult trying to rectify our situation and knowing that we are living possibly in sin.
dear sir, if you allow me as a rather young man, why not do marriage? it's free of charge as it's a sacrament. i've done it to canonize my natural marriage. they charged only a very little for the additionals (it's called stole-fee here), about 4-5 litre gasoline worth of money, and it even included a wedding gift. if it still is not applicable for you, there is a canon, if i am not mistaken, which permits cohabitation for elderly man and woman who don't do marriage life in its entirety, just like brother and sister. don't remember the exact canon unfortunately though.
Could you maybe afford to just get together with your families at your local church for a small marriage ceremony with your local priest? Or maybe just you and your wife-to-be? It doesn't have to be an extravagant ceremony, does it? I mean, I guess my point is, if you love this woman, and you want to marry her, I think you should start exploring any avenue you could possibly have to ensure you're not living in sin.
At 8:20 is a great point and I know this is my problem
It always catches me of late in the morning just before I wake up. I'm too tired to mentally focus and fight back. The temptation comes and with assistance of feeling anxious I give in. Lately I haven't used porn as often to do the deed. I have trouble getting past the 5-7 day period
A Big One I always get is "You deserve to feel good, especially after all that work. Treat yourself" or "Dont deprive yourself" A lot of times we as men especially need to watch our stress levels. What are you adding to your plate or to-do list that is unnecessary? Keep in Mind Philippians 4:19 "And My God Shall Supply All Your Needs According to His Riches In Glory" What He has is better than anything the world flesh and devil can offer us
After 40 years of immersed in porn and sex addiction and depravity, I have made an attempt to change. My wife is my reason and my rock. I have curtailed the porn viewing and flirting for the last year. I have had a handful of episodes where I have looked. But its not the episodic all night and all day chatting and viewing porn that I was used to. I go to bed when my wife goes to bed so I am not on my own and better able to resist temptation. It's hard and can make you feel like you are going crazy. You have to have a reason to make a change. Something that is SO important in your life that you would die without it/her/him. Resist. It can be done.
Very good video. I think it was the second one (your response was James 1:12) was the one I experience the most. And then the other one that I still sometimes fall victim to is the "it's not technically porn" one.
For me, lately the enemy has been telling me something like, "It will feel nice." Or "It'll be fun."
1 Corinthians 6:19-20 and the previous 7 verses help me.
Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.
Pray for me
I just said a prayer for you, my friend. May God lift you up and give you the strength to persevere. Please pray for me as well.
@@knighterrant1029 I will
To give into vanity and to act out lust
Matthew 5:28 thank you
Surely God would not want you to endure suffering like this
“Blessed is the man who has stood steadfast under trial, for when he has stood, he will receive the crown of life”
One of the most tempting lies I get told is "it feels so pleasurable". But I try to remember that God's image is what I'm looking at. God entrusted the institution of marriage as the greatest relationship between man and woman, not sexual degeneracy. Any sex outside of marriage is against God's image and wants for mankind.
Praying the FULL Rosary (15 decades) everyday will eventually give you chastity .
In my best Bishop Fulton Sheen voice "Get Behind Me Satan!"
Anytime I start with "it's JUST " I know I'm minimizing/rationalizing a behavior that will get me in trouble. It's just a text, it's just a glance, it's just admiration (lust!).
I don't know Matt. That Zelda in the back is looking pretty thicc.
Last night I was triggered into viewing pornography again, and I fell instantly back into my old fetish. I was abstinent for a little over 2 months.
Why do we fall? So we can learn how to get up! Keep up the good work and fight like crazy. Learn from it, don't make the same mistakes twice.
2 months is great. We're all sinners of one sort or another. Repent/confess and get right back on the wagon.
The most frequent temptation or lie I tell myself is that nobody is expected to be perfect, and the sin is already forgiven, which I get from 1 John 2:1-2, but then I read the rest of that passage and see my mistake. Of course no one is perfect, but that doesn’t mean we should presume on God’s good graces.
All good excellent sound advice, no issue with any of it but I have another related question. Ok so we are told as Christians and that it is normal ( nay good even)for you, as a single person, to look forward to and be excited about enjoying God’s gifts of sexual intimacy within marriage BUT that these good desires can quickly become sinful if we turn them into lust, or use them with the wrong person at the wrong time. Ok granted but that raises an interesting question I have never received a good answer to. We have all heard the standard answer about what separates a non sexual thought from a sinful one with that standard story about how we can't stop the birds flying over our heads but we can stop them building a next in our hair and yes that makes sense in a certain way we can all relate to. We can clearly dwell on something sexual for too long and let lust in BUT ... . This analogy like all analogys at some point fails and that is where I'd like some guidance. How can a single human being come to terms and control their sexual drive without ever ... Well I suppose for want of a better way of putting it... (Considering it, , thinking about it, examining it and what it is) . To bring it to a practical issue. Sexual desire for a prospective marital partner IS a fundamental thing that must be 'considered' but there does not seem to be any way of engaging with a sexual thought even towards a legitimate fiance before marriage that within one nano second will turn into lust because to think sexualy about another person outside the constraints of marriage ( and actually married ) is a sin even if you intend 100 % to be married as until the marriage ceremony has taken place you cannot call that other person truly ' yours ' . We all start out as sexual beings as teens when sexual thoughts first appear but how else can we possibly have any idea or make sense of these sexual thoughts and drives without actually experiencing them, engaging with them in some way ( but any attempt to honestly experience them will obviously overwhelm anybody in a nanosecond) it seems a genuinely impossible task. This is why I can't make sense of the sentence I opened with above about ' a healthy sexual drive in single people ' , I'd like some honest and hopefully insightful responses. Please don't reply with stuff I've read a million times before , such as for example ' prayer ' ( I believe in prayer but I've found all it can do it help stop any sexual thoughts and while that is helpful for a time it doesn't allow space for these so called legitimate sexual feeling that would allow one to consider and look forward to legitimate sexuality in its proper context, and does not help with this idea if incorporating a healthy sexuality and desire as a single person, it just removes it for a time ) or
Please don't reply with some explanation of how love and lust differ ( I understand that but as some point if I may be frank ... Love by itself does not make blood flow into the nether regions so sexual desire in all it's raw form is still relevant ) so what I'm really hoping for is some different take or explanation from a Christian perspective to help me make sense of and reconcile this idea . Really hoping someone has something to say on this I've never heard before. Just a point of information, this is not written by someone looking for an out , I fully except all Christuan doctrine and teaching on this, (no If's no but's ) and realise it's something one must suffer through and bear , however I think I'd be more at peace if teaching was ' sexual thoughts or feelings must never be entertained in any shape or form unless already married ' but that's not what is taught and I'm somehow supposed to be able to be excited about enjoying god's gift of sex within marriage now without ever somehow dealing with it or coming to terms with it. ????
Do not overthink this matter. Try to live a catholic life, but do not become obsessed with the sin of Lust. There are much worse ones to be very careful about. To NEVER look at anyone with ANY hint of lust is humanly impossible, despite what anyone might ever tell you. Relax and live your life with Christ.
@@tomlabooks3263 Thanks for the reply, I hear what you are saying and have thought that too but what I'm really asking is " what is this single person healthy sexuality/ being we are told to develop and enjoy while single without engaging with the topic in the mental realm and feeling it in the body. What is that ??? Is it just fanciful words or is there something more to it ? Without some answer on this I am left thinking of that old phrase ' created sick and commanded to be well ' and I'm not comfortable with that phrase as a Catholic obviously
@@adventureinallthings Maybe Dietrich von Hildebrand has writings about that, he's a Catholic philosopher who wrote a book called In Defense of Purity and some other books, and they influenced Pope St. John Paul II's later writings like theology of the human body, writings on love, and so on.
@@adventureinallthings I checked the whole name. In Defense of Purity: An Analysis of the Catholic Ideals of Purity and Virginity
Try to love them as God loves them. Let that love dominate and preoccupy your mind. Praise God in heart and mind for the gift of this woman. It will quench the more human urges. We as humans have the awesome gift and chance to choose and fight to be holy. Even the angels in heaven don't have that and why the saints are held into such high esteem. love and obey God with all our heart, strength, and might, and to love your neighbor ( your girl especially) the same way. Once united in marriage of course sex is permissible as a given of self. When it happens say during the night , it feels so much more special. Better than when cheapening it and horn-dogging on your wife like a teenager. I feel if you truly love the person and pray and ask for grace to be chaste and respectful to love as a husband, and to love her as her heavenly father and earthly father would want...well then u are more than half way there. May God bless you.
PEACE
6:20 Reminds me of this one meme showing the expanses of the universe and all of God's creation. Then it shows God (or Jesus, can't recall) holding the earth in His hands and saying "plz don't masturbate".
I think the idea was to mock the sentiment at this point in the clip about how, for as big as the universe is and all that God has created, is masturbation really his biggest concern?
We need to choose between two Gods. The One True God who loves us or the other one who wants to control our lives...
Ummm they both want to control our lives tho. God wants us to live his ways and Satan wants us to live his ways. The true difference is God ways are Good and better for us where Satan ways are evil and self destructive
@@gameover9390 God does not WANT anything, he does not NEED anything. The only thing that he WANTS is for US to be saved and to know Truth. He invites us to open our hearts to Him, He is OUT there knocking. Those who open, He will enter and dine with them and they with Him
Nice
I'm going on 33 this year and I'm still a porn addict.
Keep up the good fight homie
I started watching pornography again shortly after my wife had our first child. My rationale was “my only role is to be there for her, the last thing that she needs to think about is my sexual desires. Therefore, if I watch porn, I can ensure that I take my sexual desire out of the equation. Watching porn is therefore good”. My kid is now one and I am nearly over it, but still struggle.
Curiosity... let's just see what's new!
Quoting Scripture is probably the best way of combating temptation here's 2 other great ideas
Pray as many Hail Marys, Our Fathers, Jesus Prayers and other Scripted prayers as you can. the more internalized the better and from there you can move into other forms of prayer
The other is to mock the evil one. Laugh at him, revile him, make fun of him, call him ridiculous because he is! This is a sad pathetic creature who doesn't seem to know that he's beaten. A creature who actually thought he could cause God to sin while he was in the flesh. A creature who uses his power to go after the One who gave him that power to begin with. St. Thomas More once said "The devil...the proud spirit...cannot endure to be mocked.” Martin Luther echoed something similar. If you can get those two men to agree on theology it's probably pretty sound. As Matt Walsh has pointed out, the devil stands tall and proud, but he stands on stilts which can easily be kicked to bring him down to your level.
Just take out the Hail Marys, she is just a human she is not diety nor deserved worship. Only Jesus Christ is worthy of prayer
@@BlessedBeJESUSCHRIST The "Hail Mary" is not a form of worship. It's just a petition to Mary to pray for us. Also, the entire prayer is rooted in scripture.
1. "Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with you" is almost a direct quotation from Luke 1:28.
2. "Blessed art thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus" is a direct quotation from Luke 1:42.
3. "Holy Mary, mother of God," is saying that Mary was set apart by God to be the mother of God. And Mary is the mother of God because:
a). Jesus has two natures, a divine nature and a human nature, making Jesus one divine person, and, therefore, God.
b). Mothers are people who carry and give birth to human persons.
c). Since Mary carried and gave birth to Jesus that makes Mary the mother of Jesus.
d). And since Mary is the mother of Jesus, and Jesus is fully God, this means that Mary carried and gave birth to God.
e). And since Mary carried and gave birth to God, she is the mother of God.
4. "Pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen." This final sentence is a petition for Mary to pray for us to Jesus Christ, our Lord, and Savior. We say this b/c as Catholics we believe that the bonds between Christians don't pass away after death. We believe that through God's power and grace, we can not only ask the saints on Earth to pray for us, but we can also ask the Saints in Heaven to pray for us. The topic of the Saints is more complicated. So I recommend that if you have any questions you go to the Catholic Answers website and type in "saints." Tons of articles will come up explaining the historical and scriptural roots of this practice.
May God bless you, and may the peace of Christ be with you always!
Matt Walsh was talking about Ben Shapiro when he said that.
Every situation: Be gone satan. In Christs name I rid myself of you.
To me The music is annoying and silly
And distracting
Sterile background music.
Jesus spoke to the Jews (who were trying him in order to charge him) again, saying:
-I am going away.
You will look for Me but you will die in your sins.
Where I am going, you cannot come.
John 8:21
You can tell the same thing to the thoughts that are trying you, directly referring to them.
I find the Exodus 90 app very helpful in combatting sexually acting out.