If you don't want friend-zone, don't tolerate it. If she's really not that interested, so long. Life is short and we choose if it's sweet too. Pathologically nice girls, nice guys - where's the boldness that raises an amazing family?
this is deeply rooted in entire being. The beauty of this work is that if you want to date high value women we must do the personal work..side affect is feeling our authentic masculine! It’s an incredible “battle” ground for growth!
The last segment is CRUCIAL - Being a good listener can be a plus, but it is also the bane of the friend zone male - you wind up being her therapist, she will crap all over your face with all the emotional garbage in her life and then when SHE is feeling all better, she'll put herself together and go out with some girlfriends and go clubbing and looking for hookups. During the time she's out, she isn't thinking about you, because being the good listener that you are didn't establish you as someone desirable in her eyes, it made you her trashman.
Strolling down a river walk path for 20-30 mins observing 2 people in front of me with this scenario. BRUTAL! It took every fiber in my being not to shake the 20 something yr old guy and say "WTF R U DOING? YOU'RE NOT HER THERAPIST!" lol
Be strong, I had to do the same with a 7 year relationship. Later read No More Mr. Nice Guy and it resonated deeply with that and also my parents' unhealthy relationship dynamics that certainly played some influence in my own psychology indeed, liberating clarity to grow from. Personally reframing pathological niceness from "being a bitch" but rather "being inauthentic" feels much more encouraging and taking it more serious, but it is indeed a weaker "bitch" mentality that needs seasoning of more experiences of authentic expression (especially of frustrations, man speaking his mind boldly to contest infractions of personal boundaries and values) , manly rite of passage, and certainly isn't resolved completely alone and isolated which is more of an obstacle today among the comforts and digital remote world interaction. In a sense, being past old emotions of insecurities and having comfort in acknowledging where we've improved and where we're at is powerful - yes I was weaker at that, yes I have to learn this, yes learning bravery requires a lot of integrating mistakes/embarrassment/putting ego aside and doing it anyways in the process, yes I am human. Sometimes a manipulator will argue a victim is stuck, there is no more neuroplasticity in their experiences to reshape their mind - wrong and perhaps one of the key insights to those feeling beyond broken in life... neuroplasticity. The man is authentic, be authentic. A lot of it is very subconscious - takes a deep honing of the deeply ingrained habits indeed. The conventional wisdom often neglects this "subconscious" habitual aspect as if there's a flip-of-a-switch fix and the blame for no quick fix... inpatient society thinking. The best things take deep gradual long-term efforts and boldness.
This post is a year old, so I'm curious how you're doing now. I got out of a 13 year relationship a little over 7 months ago, and I'm still not over it. I've been working on myself and doing all the things you're supposed to, but I still can't stop thinking about her, nor am I interested in getting into another relationship anytime soon. It doesn't hurt anymore, I just feel like I'm drifting on, going through the motions.
It starts with a dishonest approach, trying to stop rejection at all costs. Men do it to themselves via dishonesty It clearly has to be romantic to start.
The problem with that is there are very few men women look at and find attractive. So if a man she’s not attracted to tries flirting with her, she’ll see him as a creep. The best most men can hope for is to be around her as a friend so she might see you as an option to date.
If you think about it, the gulf between a boy's relationship with his mother and a peer relationship with female, is far greater than a girl's relation with her father and her peer relationship with a male. To a little boy, mother is nearly a goddess, the literal source of life. And mom is not able to teach him about relations with a peer female at all! The gap in the male's education can only be filled by other males, ideally, ones older and far more experienced. Robert Glover is the uncle you wish you had growing up.
Thanks! Maybe the most valuable 13 Minutes for me on youTube! Describes all my problem fields in all my past relationships ON POINT! Too much availability, too much intimacy, always wanted to to it right, be perfect for her, try to solve all her problems (covert contracts) and thus less and less s*xual tension and/or respect. I became their soulmates, best friend...and less interesting in bed.
Most of my friends, and always my closest ones, were always women, so there’s nothing wrong with being friends with women. But we don’t put ourselves in the friend zone. When a woman first sees you, she already knows whether or not she’s attracted to you. You can’t build attraction if she’s already not attracted, you’ll most likely just be seen as a creep. If she was attracted, you have to work at maintaining it or she’ll lose attraction for you. And never tell a guy to just be himself. He’s been himself and it hasn’t worked. Meanwhile he sees women falling for macho bad boys so he knows that’s what attracts women. But I’ve seen how bad boys can destroy a woman’s life so the best we can do is to remain friends and see if she’ll realize she’s better off with you.
Women subconsciously decide if you're a potential viable partner within the FIRST 3-10 seconds of meeting you. If you're being put in the friend zone, your only other option is "walk away completely zone" lol. If she's a legit cool chick to hang with (yes some do exist or used to exist anyway) then just become friends and maybe she'll help hook you up as wing-woman. But if you can't handle seeing her new potential bf come into the picture without becoming jealous or passive aggressive... respectfully WALK AWAY! And don't EVER date her if she changes her mind down the road and don't give them any opinion's about their new partner unless they ask you first (unless you suspect he's a legit psycho or abuser).
Not a lot to gain unless she's genuinely cool to hang out with but that's a rare instance since they can hardly associate with us + if she's like described, there's a good chance you'll develop feelings for her
I have a rare instance where I have a female friend who I once wanted, but now I don't have that desire. Early on, I told her I wanted to be more than friends, and she was honest with me and told me she didn't feel the same way. She didn't lead me on or give me false hope like other girls had done. It hurt at first, but eventually, I got over that and just enjoyed her company. She's a cool person. Now I'm glad we never got together because it wouldn't have lasted on a romantic level, and I like having her around as a friend.
You cant respect your women in the bedrom, you need to treat her like a hoe but outside the bedrom she needs to EARN your attention and time and she will fight for it IF you dont respect her in the bedrom.
i've attracted women insanely hot, women of my dreams, they were very interested in me, liked my looks, but i friendzone myself always even if i had sexy stuff going on for some weeks/months, sooner or later im friendzoned and most times nothing happens
![Lp. Сердце Вселенной #60 РОЖДЕНИЕ ЛОЛОЛОШКИ [Финал] • Майнкрафт](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/YoR0pAV9FVQ/mqdefault.jpg)
If you don't want friend-zone, don't tolerate it. If she's really not that interested, so long. Life is short and we choose if it's sweet too. Pathologically nice girls, nice guys - where's the boldness that raises an amazing family?
3:00 👌👌👌
5:00💯💯💯
6:05 Intimacy vs Passion
8:00 Put ourselves there...
this is deeply rooted in entire being. The beauty of this work is that if you want to date high value women we must do the personal work..side affect is feeling our authentic masculine! It’s an incredible “battle” ground for growth!
Great point. And women are a feedback source how authentic and embodied we are being.
Robert Glover is great - I wish he’d tour high schools and give this info out so men have a clue
I was iffy , but shit, this was a great conversation.
This is powerful 😢 been like this for ages
I hear you brother..it takes practice and feel the pain of “failure” or rejection. Hard to argue with this..I’m having small successes! Keep going!
The last segment is CRUCIAL - Being a good listener can be a plus, but it is also the bane of the friend zone male - you wind up being her therapist, she will crap all over your face with all the emotional garbage in her life and then when SHE is feeling all better, she'll put herself together and go out with some girlfriends and go clubbing and looking for hookups. During the time she's out, she isn't thinking about you, because being the good listener that you are didn't establish you as someone desirable in her eyes, it made you her trashman.
Strolling down a river walk path for 20-30 mins observing 2 people in front of me with this scenario. BRUTAL! It took every fiber in my being not to shake the 20 something yr old guy and say "WTF R U DOING? YOU'RE NOT HER THERAPIST!" lol
This guy GETS it.
'The guy version' is great advice. Thank you.
Gold information for you “nice guys”
Man I love Bob. Helped me so much. Thank you
Man I needed to hear this. Just got out of an 11 year relationship.
Be strong brother
Be strong, I had to do the same with a 7 year relationship. Later read No More Mr. Nice Guy and it resonated deeply with that and also my parents' unhealthy relationship dynamics that certainly played some influence in my own psychology indeed, liberating clarity to grow from. Personally reframing pathological niceness from "being a bitch" but rather "being inauthentic" feels much more encouraging and taking it more serious, but it is indeed a weaker "bitch" mentality that needs seasoning of more experiences of authentic expression (especially of frustrations, man speaking his mind boldly to contest infractions of personal boundaries and values) , manly rite of passage, and certainly isn't resolved completely alone and isolated which is more of an obstacle today among the comforts and digital remote world interaction. In a sense, being past old emotions of insecurities and having comfort in acknowledging where we've improved and where we're at is powerful - yes I was weaker at that, yes I have to learn this, yes learning bravery requires a lot of integrating mistakes/embarrassment/putting ego aside and doing it anyways in the process, yes I am human. Sometimes a manipulator will argue a victim is stuck, there is no more neuroplasticity in their experiences to reshape their mind - wrong and perhaps one of the key insights to those feeling beyond broken in life... neuroplasticity. The man is authentic, be authentic. A lot of it is very subconscious - takes a deep honing of the deeply ingrained habits indeed. The conventional wisdom often neglects this "subconscious" habitual aspect as if there's a flip-of-a-switch fix and the blame for no quick fix... inpatient society thinking. The best things take deep gradual long-term efforts and boldness.
This post is a year old, so I'm curious how you're doing now. I got out of a 13 year relationship a little over 7 months ago, and I'm still not over it. I've been working on myself and doing all the things you're supposed to, but I still can't stop thinking about her, nor am I interested in getting into another relationship anytime soon. It doesn't hurt anymore, I just feel like I'm drifting on, going through the motions.
It starts with a dishonest approach, trying to stop rejection at all costs. Men do it to themselves via dishonesty
It clearly has to be romantic to start.
The problem with that is there are very few men women look at and find attractive. So if a man she’s not attracted to tries flirting with her, she’ll see him as a creep. The best most men can hope for is to be around her as a friend so she might see you as an option to date.
Why did it look like jim carrey was in the thumbnail lol 🤣
If you think about it, the gulf between a boy's relationship with his mother and a peer relationship with female, is far greater than a girl's relation with her father and her peer relationship with a male. To a little boy, mother is nearly a goddess, the literal source of life. And mom is not able to teach him about relations with a peer female at all! The gap in the male's education can only be filled by other males, ideally, ones older and far more experienced. Robert Glover is the uncle you wish you had growing up.
Thanks! Maybe the most valuable 13 Minutes for me on youTube! Describes all my problem fields in all my past relationships ON POINT! Too much availability, too much intimacy, always wanted to to it right, be perfect for her, try to solve all her problems (covert contracts) and thus less and less s*xual tension and/or respect. I became their soulmates, best friend...and less interesting in bed.
It's so counterintuitive.
Most of my friends, and always my closest ones, were always women, so there’s nothing wrong with being friends with women. But we don’t put ourselves in the friend zone. When a woman first sees you, she already knows whether or not she’s attracted to you. You can’t build attraction if she’s already not attracted, you’ll most likely just be seen as a creep. If she was attracted, you have to work at maintaining it or she’ll lose attraction for you.
And never tell a guy to just be himself. He’s been himself and it hasn’t worked. Meanwhile he sees women falling for macho bad boys so he knows that’s what attracts women. But I’ve seen how bad boys can destroy a woman’s life so the best we can do is to remain friends and see if she’ll realize she’s better off with you.
But how to be myself and reveal but at the same time don't tell the partner everything and have an edge?
Women subconsciously decide if you're a potential viable partner within the FIRST 3-10 seconds of meeting you. If you're being put in the friend zone, your only other option is "walk away completely zone" lol.
If she's a legit cool chick to hang with (yes some do exist or used to exist anyway) then just become friends and maybe she'll help hook you up as wing-woman. But if you can't handle seeing her new potential bf come into the picture without becoming jealous or passive aggressive... respectfully WALK AWAY! And don't EVER date her if she changes her mind down the road and don't give them any opinion's about their new partner unless they ask you first (unless you suspect he's a legit psycho or abuser).
What's wrong with just being friends with a woman
Nothing, if you want it that way
Not a lot to gain unless she's genuinely cool to hang out with but that's a rare instance since they can hardly associate with us + if she's like described, there's a good chance you'll develop feelings for her
Don't do it...trust me
I have a rare instance where I have a female friend who I once wanted, but now I don't have that desire. Early on, I told her I wanted to be more than friends, and she was honest with me and told me she didn't feel the same way. She didn't lead me on or give me false hope like other girls had done. It hurt at first, but eventually, I got over that and just enjoyed her company. She's a cool person. Now I'm glad we never got together because it wouldn't have lasted on a romantic level, and I like having her around as a friend.
You cant respect your women in the bedrom, you need to treat her like a hoe but outside the bedrom she needs to EARN your attention and time and she will fight for it IF you dont respect her in the bedrom.
Its literally all down to looks, if you arent attractive you will end up in friend zone. These 3 clowns never discuss this.
i've attracted women insanely hot, women of my dreams, they were very interested in me, liked my looks, but i friendzone myself always even if i had sexy stuff going on for some weeks/months, sooner or later im friendzoned and most times nothing happens