PRACTICAL STEPS TO GET OUT OF LIMERENCE
Вставка
- Опубліковано 7 сер 2024
- Get access to the FREE hypnotic experience:
“No more Limerence: Initiating the journey towards life” bit.ly/3w0g8uy
FROM LIMERENCE TO REALITY COURSE: bit.ly/3L0hVUt
📌BOOK 1:1 TRANSFORMATIONAL SESSIONS W/ME: paperbell.me/evita-pk
📌Limited capacity & serious enquiries only - APPLY for 1:1 mentorship: bit.ly/4dhWUBr
📌FIND ME ON IG: / evitapkcoaching
⚠️ Disclaimer: These videos are for educational purposes only. Information provided on this channel is not intended to be a substitute for in person professional medical advice ⚠️
I've learnt about limerence a few months ago, and I realized that every single "love" or "crush" I've ever had in my life has actually been limerence. I have never felt healthy love, I'm not even sure I am able to grasp the concept of it. I don't actually know what love is. If someone is available and willing to be with me, I don't find him attractive. I don't know how to hack myself in order to change that, I desperately want to become the opposite of what I am currently, but I have no idea how. Stable and consistent romantic connections feel boring and smothering to me. How do I change that in myself?
Pastor Robert and Lisa Blake's
Great advice,father daughter talk utube
Listen once don't like no harm
I have exactly the same problem.
I also have the same exact problem and I don't know how to come out of it .
😢
In case it helps, in my experience, I’ve come to find that limerence happens when I go a long time without doing what I need to do to make something real happen. I’m male, and an introvert and was very shy, so it took a lot for me to need to do something about my feelings. They had to be very important. If I failed to be able to bring myself to do something, I would start to think about the person every second of the day after some time. However, in the event that I did what I needed to do, and made my intentions clear, there was no obsession.
I look back at my limerant episodes with great regret, because nothing real could ever be as good as my imagination is able to come up with. I still have regrets about those people I had been limerant about, and I still wonder if I could have made those relationships into a reality if I had only been better or done better or had more charisma or something.
As someone who has suffered from this in the past due to emotionally unavailable parents, the only way to heal is having a healthy self concept, I now have a daily practice of re-parenting myself, I've learned to love myself unconditionally and I'm able to self soothe using positive affirmations looking in the mirror with love and acceptance and knowing how deserving I am of healthy love. Its been a long journey I'm 53 now and single no kids. I'm not perfect but I've come a long way❤
Do you think limerance has stopped you from meeting someone in real life? You’re more comfortable fantasizing?
Completely Understand you, Reparenting is the only option to heal, its as if we are born to be tortured by seeking love of emotionally unavailable people.
@@don8829 it is like torture sometimes 😔
I'm proud of you for being able to do that
@@Vextrove thank you 😊
The horror of a life unlived. It's devastating to realize you're old and never married when that's all you've ever wanted and prayed for. Absolutely devastating. I don't want to live this lonely life anymore.
God loves you more than any human could. His Son died so you could know the love of God by reconciliation with Him. Jesus is wsiting, just call on His name and He will save you and give you your abundant life. 💕
If you ain’t living and you have enough money to even be in a relationship that’s on you.
Another person can’t give your life meaning.
@@namedrop721 Do you think you're helping, or are you just an evil person?
I understand. Hugs and hugs
ItS never too late. People get married in their 80s. Go and live!!
6:36 lack of self confidence, lack fulfillment, don’t value their time because spend hours of hours thinking about the other person, fantasizing things aren’t there
9:48 whatever you’re reading is possibly what you’re projecting
10:41 if it’s something you can’t tell them, then you’re off limit
12:47 find meaning in your life, what would offer me fulfillment
I have experienced limerence my whole life. In a way, I never even thought about it. I wasn't self aware at all to stop and think "hm why do I obsess over people and think about them 24/7". Now that I can see the pattern, it's crushing me. I am trying so hard not to think about them but my thoughts keep winning. I cut off contact with my limerent person and I thought I was making progress until today, I saw them and they didn't notice me. I wanted to flip the table over and rip the canteen to shreds. It's killing me and I don't know what to do.
Through alot of therapy and self work, ive narrowed it down to one single "need", the need to be wanted and to ultimately be special. So special that they cant help but fall in love with me. The fact that i know they had attraction to me and liked my humor and personality still wasnt enough for them to reach out to me, is the biggest issue. That im not special enough for them to even try.
❤
I too would like to be the special person in someone's life. I don't think that's unreasonable. A person's love should be the most special. I just want to be someone's one and only. I'm a very loyal person and I don't think I'm been unreasonable.
You described what I am going through right now so well
I really like Evita's style - direct, simple, no psychobabble, no affectation, confident without being arrogant or full of herself, or shoving things down our throat, so refreshing and unusual for a life coach!
I have watched a lot of videos on this subject. You really explain it in a way that really hit home. Thank You...
My problem so far was fantasising too much, creating a relationship with a person in my head instead of being in reality and actually trying to get to know someone 😢 I would go into highest high just daydreaming about them, being with them was never any special. I ended up feeling hurt and disappointed because when reality hit it was never good enough. Getting addicted to my dreams and then ending things was really hard to get over. Understanding what it's going on I've just stopped these fantasies all together. It's hard when you did it your whole life though 😢
For me, the hardest thing to let go of is the fantasizing. It's so easy to slip back into it, especially when I'm in dream mode or feeling bored or sad. It starts automatically, and then I recognize it and decide if I want to continue. It really is debilitating.
That you mentioned manifestation is so on point. Many people with these fantasies use manifestation and there are several UA-cam videos that deepen the false hope with their manifestation techniques
For sure, and UA-cam has an algorithm as well so you just keep seeing more and more of them too
I'm so glad that this is being talked about a lot more now
Wow, what a video. You're the best discovery of the last six months.
Fantastic, I realise I had been using Limmerance as a coping strategy I now realise, it feels like a terrible thing to let go of, I feel very hopeless, but I guess this is normal. Thank you for the practical steps, I have sorted of started the process, but like any drug addict I've yet to go cold turkey, the pain coming will be too great
Just throwing in that people with autism often experience limerence, for many of the reasons you mention.
What's your opinion on someone with autism getting over their LO?
My partner who's on the spectrum had limerence for another person on the spectrum who also was on the spectrum. There is no contact now, but I don't know how to help him get over the LO faster
being lonely and isolated, I have nothing else but limirence
Are you able to join a social group? many free available. Walking outside everyday helps as well.
I've been in this state for over 15 months. It's taken a huge toll on me and I want a way out!
I love how you explained everything. In such a simple and consice manner.
I know the title says "practical steps" but some people are not clear or straight foward; or they go on and on.
This is: stop this. Do this and that.
Also, the actual putting into perspective the unlived life right there in our faces.
Which is actually very necessary. Especially for those of us who love LALA LAND. Everything is so perfect there. Right?
Evita, the best explanation of limerence I've ever heard. Clear, meaningfull.Thanks a lot 🌻
Glad this resonated!
I’ve learned so much about my limering from this video. Thank you so much for making this content!
My way of limerence is different; I only get it with people I like or crushes, 9/10 these people are attainable . I recently experienced limerence with a girl I considered good enough who I went out on a date with. The red flags was there I noticed them. And I still set boundaries as I noticed that this person is still getting over their previous marriage. But I think I let my guard down during our date. I realized that this girl was completely my type but it was obvious that she wasn’t ready. The thing is she didn’t want to acknowledge the fact that she wasn’t. So I think I had limerance towards the fact that I want to see her happy whenever I stalked her socials and see that she is happy it made me happy. I think I also had limerence towards the person that she “could” be. I found myself waiting for her to become this person that she “could” be. Also limerence can occur with anyone with me whether I find that person attractive or somewhat good enough. Now I’m just focusing on my internal happiness and the person that I could be.
I feel this way for people who reciprocate the feeling. But I obsess, ruminate and suffocate myself with thoughts and ideals they simply aren't capable of fulfilling. I make them responsible for my happiness without them even knowing it. The simple action of them saying, hey I can't hang out today is enough to send me spiraling. Every intrusive thought centered around being unworthy, unwanted, pathetic and unlovable enters my mind. I feel no relief until they message again, or see me again- but even then it's brief. They simply are unable to fill this enormous void, or get me off the hamster wheel of my intrusive and toxic thoughts. I'd go as far as to say that if they are genuinely kind and attentive i purposely make up scenarios to reinforce my trauma. It's exhausting and self defeating.
I get stuck and hyper fixated on my exes for years. Wasted my youth.
I really want to get out if limerence .
I dont know if I will completely get out of this addiction but i cannot thank you enough for making these videos. You naming and explaining all of this is just invaluable for us
Evita, you are an answer to my prayers. My God. Thank you.
I love your videos, they give me some hope! 🙏
My person was disrespectful to me , I took a step back finally and realized this person is not my savor. But after 6 months of non stop obsessetion I think hope to have a understanding of what im dealing with.😮
Proud of you. Keep going. You’re showing strength and resilience. You got this!
Oh my god. You are
Amazing. The best therapist
Thank you for the very kind manner that you are using , to help people get through this intesely painful and often gut wrenching experience..something that- even though its almost always not real, it feels very painful cruel and tragically REAL to the person experiencing it...
What if it is limerence that is keeping me a bit happy just by obsessing that someone loves me is easier route than accepting the horrible situation at present
Same.
It is! Usually limerence gets really intense when we expirience rough times. It is a coping mechanism
08:54 I love how you already know we are thinking about them. Spot on. LOL
Terrific presentation
I've watched two of your videos on this topic, which I have found very intresting. I didn't know i was doing this practically all my life lol. Im experiencing this more now since my break up.
I hear you. Breakups can be a massive trigger to go back to the old coping ways because there’s another broken connection there we are trying to “survive”. Glad you are around. The fact that you identified with what this is, has opened a massive door - you’ll see it as time goes. I have quite a few more videos coming on the topic which will give you more & more clarity on the matter.
@@evitapkcoaching Thank you so much for you knowledge and for responding to me ❤️❤️❤️😀😀😀
I'm in the same place as you! It's tough and I'm sorry you're going through it.
Recently divorced and am feeling that "will I ever be loved again" feeling which I think is a big part of why I'm experiencing limerance for a coworker.
I hope to overcome this soon.
My favorite song about being in Limerence: Vikki Carr - It Must Be Him
My favorite song about getting over and out of Limerence: Viola Wills - Gonna Get Along Without You
I looked up the DSM description of Borderline Personality Disorder…very similar it’s scary…I hate Limerence!!!
This is an EXCELLENT video thank you
Thank you very much, it's really helpful 🌸
Damn, you’re spot on. You questioned my idea to manifest someone else to fulfill my need for deep love. Maybe I need to ask why I need that in the first place. Thank you 🙏
Oh if I managed to do that then my mission here is accomplished! And you should - that's a great direction to take which will give you a lot of insight.
But a need for deep love is a very basic health human need. What r u about?
Thanks so much for the guidance and honesty
You are so welcome. Sending a lot of love to you
thankyou madam! this is waking me up
Thank you so much! 😄
This is hard to hear but i qm glad i did . I am working on this now
Thankyou mam for being soo truthful.Going through it since the last 2 years, but now things are getting better day by day because i started to accept the reality which is difficult and soo painful sometimes but now i know that i will pass through this difficult situation. Keep going and continue the great work mam 😊 with a lot of love thankyou once again ❤
So happy for you. You are on your way 💜
Yes please we need more videos
Thank you.
Trying to apply the thought process of not doing what the mind wants for example.
I train Muay Thai and if I want to score high in hitting the body, don't aim for the body, you should aim hard for the head or legs so the opponents guard is more occupied elsewhere. Its a process of setting up the journey to end objective by taking 2 steps back and 3 steps forward.
Thank you
thanks
UA-cam knows my inner most thoughts and internal struggles....wtf? Subscribed
lol
Believing that someone is sending you secret messages or that there is some deeper hidden meaning to what they say to you is more what you would expect in a person suffering from erotomania rather than limerance, the limerant person generally can distinguish between fantasy and reality.
10:51 you're not exaggerating ma'am, you're so right when you said it made me feel loved but it's not the reality
Is it anxious/preoccupied attachment type that is prone to limerence ? I think so.
I had this activated for first time in my life due to parent bereavement I think...as a maladaptive coping strategy as they would say... from extreme trauma/grief to obsessive infatuation (equally as strong polar emotions).
I suppressed facing the death for 6 months.
I lost the plot over one chick in simple English for a year+ ...she was not a 'mummy replacement' as such (probably Freudian analysis) ...but an emotional tsunami that swept me away to avoid confronting death...I still have the limerence even to a degree now...but I'm getting free of it through 'meta' understanding. She is in a LT relationship (unavailable) and the age gap is beyond healthy. It was never going to happen.
Seeing it was all pre-loaded/pre-set has helped me a lot.
My type is of course adult 'preoccupied' attachment.
(Commenter anonymity is great on YT)
02:47 "I know. Shocking! Right?"
Utterly unfathomable.
Thank you for this video, it was helpful. I was in limerence stage several times in my life but It was sometimes helpful to reach some of my goals, for instance learn a language and moving abroad. It was a sort of motivation. Limerence also nourishes my art, especially poetry. Tbh I don't really want the relationship, I prefer the virtual contact. The big issue is to be emotionally engaged. I can see the red flags but at the same time, it is hard enough to find and be into someone who check most of my criterias (no smoking, drinking etc). Without limerence I would not be interested in having a partner. Maybe I watched too many romcom. I desire romantic experience but only from afar. To really be with someone and spend lot of time with them? I would suffocate. To live with someone and share a same bed? That sounds like a nightmare to me. Can someone relate? When I choose to be realistic, then I block the other person or ask them to block me.
For the fulfillment part, I am really content in my life but I tend to reach to people when I feel bored instead of enjoying my boredom.
What if the problems in the present are so scary just like they were in the past for me that I feel numb in my present that I only feel good when I fantasize that someone loves me
How do you address the wounds and heal?
It is my attitude for life. 😂✌🏻
No headaches no heartaches. 😎
It is hard for me to not to think about him even he left me and keep on giving me hot and cold treatment. I can't remove him out of my life even he told me that he doesn't want to be with me. I can't stop messaging him and act as if he didn't break up with me. My head hurts just to think that I will have to live my life without him. So hard for me to accept the reality. I didn't want to accept the truth before but now that I want to move on, it still hard. My situation is so terrible and painful but I can't stop myself.
Go no contact. For your sanity. Don't warn him just become unreachable
@@TammBianc i will message him for the last time if he will call again. I cant just be unreachable. I think I don't have the courage to do that so I want to do it gently. If he calls again, I will tell him that he should let me move on and not accuse me or else I will block him.
my last crush, was not that big of a crush or limirence until he left the space around me, and I was his limirence figure too, but I am sue he forgotten me whilst I, in hoplessness of any future lov, keeping holding into him.
I dated my girl....the girl I have limerence for. It was great until I self abandoned so hard,I exploded and broke up with her. We have been in love for almost 10 years. Only been 3 months tomorrow since we been done. It's the hardest...😭
What if my limerent object responded in some way? she started being part of my life, we meet on weekends, its really hard to break this up, specially for the limerent one...
Are if their creating their best reality they need to see the limerance and acknowledge it exist it’s in that state therefore if I understand this state , I can redirect the mind into the thoughts and feelings of having that which am creating which is already created within the self. And start attracting this person into my reality.
I think limerence is simply a developmental arrest in adolescence. I am having a crush right now, but for the first time I refuse to feel ashamed for it. It will pass.
So - the spaces of time between reach outs can be flashing - still thinking past reasonable
My husband is having a limerence affair 15 months with a co worker. We have been together 11 yrs married 5. He left when I was 3 months pregnant & our 2 yr old. He lied through therapy saying she is just a friend until I found proof. All the txt were very sexual & based on future fantasy with her. They bad mouth me & her bf at the time- as if im keeping them apart. They say they are soul mates. He refuses to come home our 2nd daughter is now 6 months old. He tells me he was always misriable- he thought i would change- he says i never loved him etc... just crazy stuff. I've told him I want to work on our marriage & I'm willing to own my side of the street. He is still "talking" to his LO. Should I give up waiting for him to "snap" out of it? Should i get a divorce? He seems crazy- like an entirely diffrent person. Very angry- spiteful & blames me for him having the affair. He says horrible things to me like I made him marry me- made him have kids with me- He is a Rollercoaster of emotions like Jackel & Hyde- I'm so scared for myself & my babies. Any advise?
I have watched the channel of Marriage Helper and also the channel Following Fenna in the recent 2 weeks. Acutally I have binge watched (guess why !!). I strongly recommend you binge watch them, too. Good luck to you. It might be a limerent episode from what you describe - and if he is a good man doing bad things (as they say at the channel Marriage Helper) chances are not bad you could come together (and have an improved committed faithful ! relationship, if you work on it).
@franziskani yes I watch both channels alot! I find them so helpful! Standing 17 months... this is the hardest thing ive gone through in my life.
don't play his drama game, but don't be rude? he is just one option
The guy who invented divorce got the inspiration from people like your husband. I hope you get rid of him. You and the kids deserve to be free from this idiot.
Yes boo. Leave him.
ok, isolation is not ending, so what can we do?
I ponder this question, although i know currently i have not been in the No Contact stage for near long enough. ... BUT i do wonder: Is it Possible to EVER Be Friends Again with Your LO After Your Obsession and "Need" for Them is Over?
For starters, I never had a neglected childhood, but have always felt worthless and never good enough.
I was 'friends' with my LO for about 7 years before limerence took over. I met her on a 'Last Rites' trip i had taken to South America (we both live in the USA) and had every intention of ending my life upon my return (Not going into that here) ,,, but she kept creeping into my mind and i wanted to see her one more time, which led to me setting up a reunion with the group that all met in SA. And without her knowing it she inadvertently saved me just by being her, she just made me feel happy when i was near her. She made me feel like there is Good in the World. I did not tell her any of this. We traveled with that small group on several occasions to several countries and US states over a period of a few years. She lives and lived at that time in a different state than I do and other than those few trips I would never see her in person. Our contact was pretty much messaging each other on FB on occasion and the commenting and reactions on that same site. We would discuss such things as intimate as her break-up with her boyfriend, etc. Always had a non-romantic crush on her but never had her on my mind all the time. Enjoyed our Messenger talks and would feel good when she would comment on a FB post or whatever. YES, I never had romantic feelings for her, just wanted to be around her as she lit up the room, was (is) genuinely kind and compassionate, and just made me feel good about myself as I've spent most of my adult life lonely and alone (I'm 59) due to both being a nationwide contractor living in strange cities with no local friends and also because i suffer from depression and well, don't know how to love like normal people (controlling and possessive and I don't like who I am I am when i turn into that guy) so I've usually avoided putting myself into a position where i might meet someone i like romantically. ... and then one day my LO (before she was my LO) told me she didn't feel desired in her current marriage and I made the mistake of crossing the line by telling her i always had a 'crush' on her and how sweet and pretty and freaking HOT she is and well, I crossed the line with a comment about her naked hotness to make her feel that YES she is desirable (and yet i never thought about sex with her and that's the truth) and BAM she blocked me for 3 months. In that 3 months i literally fell apart, even surprising myself on the giant hole left in my heart she once filled, never realizing how important she really was to me until that moment. But she came back into my life 3 months later and over the following 2 years (2021-2023) we became much closer and talked online all the time and before i knew it I was full-blown straight-up OBSESSED with her, could not get enough of her, couldn't even look at a clock without subconsciously subtracting the 2 hours to fit her time-zone, could not stop thinking about her 24/7 until she could no longer deal with it. It was she who first introduced me to the word Limerence. Never heard of it, and even then she continued to try to be my friend until it was just too much for her. (Mind you she is married with a young child). Still, I never had a romance-fueled fantasy about her, i just wanted her in the same room with me, and someone I could hug when i needed a hug. I'm a lonely man and i know her attention when i received it was like a drug filled with pure joy when talking to her (never on the phone, only in messages). She was there for me at my lowest times. ... Anyway as my Obsession grew she would continue to tell me how unhealthy our relationship was for not only me, but for her, too, until it was no longer feasible for her. She tried, oh how she tried to help me, and she knows EVERYTHING about me, how i feel about her, my hopelessness of life, etc, but i was beyond help as long as we were in contact and 'we' (she, but i concurred) decided to cut ties for a year so i could get over her. I know that was a tough decision for her because she did not want to hurt me, but it wasn't healthy for her either and I commend her for doing what was (is) best for her as she has her own struggles with depression and loneliness. 8 months later and I'm not obsessed with her but i know i am far from being over her. ... i hope one day she and i can be friends but i doubt she would want to, nor does she really have a reason to want to be. Yes, I am currently in therapy to deal with my loneliness and other issues not connected to her or my limerence, but the VA (I'm a non-combat, no ptsd veteran) doesn't seem to recognize Limerence, so i have no therapy for that, are you available, Heide? I can afford it) ... its so f'ing hard, but i hope the day comes when i don't think about her my LO at all and then MAYBE we can be friends like it once was.
I haven't had a relationship in 25 years because I don't really know how to, i don't know what happiness really feels like and most everything in my life feels hopeless and I often wonder if tomorrow's sunrise is worth it, but i put on the face for the public and friends to see and wake up for another day. My LO isn't the cause of this, I don't know what is, but I know it isn't the loss of her friendship. It's who I am. .... How do I find a therapist who deals in depth with limerence? Thoughts, or am i too late on this thread?
Pastor Robert and Lisa Blake's
Great life advice
I have started this process of disconnecting from fantasy thinking and limerence. I am suddenly having all new addictions pop up like sugar eating. Any advice is welcome on this obvious transference
Limerence is horrible 😢
😢 I know
So I watched your video because I thought Limerence is what I go through in every relationship I've ever had but now I'm not sure because you said that it is an obsession with someone that you don't know but I obsess over people that I'm getting to know, like when I first meet someone that I like I think of them always and I want to spend all my time with them. And not spending time with them makes me obsess that much more. Is that the same thing or something different?
If you're obsessing then it's limerance. You can still have this outlook with people you're getting to know or even already know.
@@prolozaloser4461 I thought so, thank you for your reply.
getting out of limirence is painful, it is nice to be limirent.
I’m having a hard time even knowing if what I’m experiencing is Limerence, because the person I’m obsessing over reciprocates my feelings.
Same, hope you are ok!
@@kiraleederriman1545 I definitely wasn’t yesterday. I’m missing him so much. We used to be so close and spoke everyday and now he’s so distant.
@@jdprettynailsmaybe you have been discarded and you are dealing with a narcissist or histrionic...worth looking into that.
@@danutplesu3352 I’ve thought about it but no. As someone raised by a narcissist, I know that’s not the case with him. He’s just scared. I got too close and now he’s pulling away because he doesn’t think he can live up to my standards.
I have limerence for a girl who's refused to say anything to me and give me closure, i absolutely hate her more than anything imaginable. I've asked her to say something, to me to give closure, but she refuses to give it
She doesn't owe you closure. She doesn't owe you anything. It's on you to dismantle the obsession you've created in your head. Hating someone because they rejected you is incredibly selfish and entitled.
how do i get her to stop showing up in my dreams though...
Patience :(
My limerence. I approached him and turns out he doesn't even know me 😢😅
I am desperate and searching for help, its true that daily practice self love al self steem helps, and receive help from mental health profesional, but is horrible, i can do anything in my day whitouth thinking in this person, i dream a lot about him, more than with anyone i know, im always day dreaming, and atached to his breadcrumbing, i want to be free, ir feels like a soul tie i want to cut
Go no contact and block him on everything my girl. Get yourself into therapy, journal, do sports, read novels. Active stuff that keeps your mind engaged. Above all work on your self-esteem. Good luck
And leave your phone when you start to spiral! Books keep your mind cleaner than a phone.
I’m a very social person. I don’t think you can stereotype all of us like that.
Great topic. I have been watching a lot of trauma,attachment,self improvment videos but for the fisrt time someone is talking abot a huge part of my lifr. well, now it's much better, I know why I limernce, the actions this persom is doing in my dreams are things I wanted a mom to do, touch, hug, be happy with me and not demanding me to do a lot for them.
from what I've seen to be a par of healing this is stoooooop social media,watching sereis and movies ( yes and this is a big part, I used to limernce with actors ) stop listening to music , stop all these things that make your imagination so unreal! pray to god, have a strong relationship with him, find yourself, love your combany , how? by healing trauma,breathing practices and stay with nature, find a hoppy.
Another shitty situation I was put in, I would’ve never have guessed someone I found attractive to the eyes was just a lustful liberance or whatever the shit. But everything is disappointing n I accept!
Welcome to quiet mental breakdowns because their actions don't match your fantasies. Co worker limerance!!
Fuck that, my lady limerant has been the catalyst to making me elevate to the highest levels. Im a much much better man because of her. Shes my greatest inspiration. My mommy and my lil wife, and she probably knows it. These youtube therapist are trying discourage us from our paramours. Haters hate on what they gave up on!
But seriously, letting go is liberating af😊
I am limirent but people who are attracted to me are way worse.
its weird how from what i can see most comments are women but the most ppl that ive seen who are obsessively clingy from no self worth/ past trauma are guys. weird.
Being a gay guy in limerence over your straight friend is a different type of hell
get help bro
@@darkseid5328 look at your profile pic… and I’m the one who needs help?
I feel so ashamed of being limerant
No need to be ashamed, work on your wounds. You can do it.👍❤
but I think it's OK to have some of this fantasy as long it's your private thing and it doesn't obstruct you. It's like little friend inside. I also don't recommend telling that to the "object", because you'll lose your fantasy and feel bored (other than awkwardness)? I had intensive feelings these days and I wish I kept some things for myself and behave differently with him, but if we were like that, we wouldn't limerate. also you might be someone's object and you will be indifferent or scared
No its not a friend. It becomes more intrusive thoughts and like a drug
@@SD-xx7nu hm I don't know why I wrote that comment which I did before so I came back
they were 28 and missing out on so much.. okay haha
fantasy can be an evil spirit we must be delivered from thro Jesus power alone
Wow just learning about limerence and idk but all this manifestation thing that is going on right now, is really bad? Because you do all this delusional stuff that he likes you etc. snd you lose yourself in these unrealistic thinking patterns…talking about me tho 🥲 it’s hard for me to step out of that.. always tried to manifest „my“ person
It’s really hard to let go of, I am struggling
@@joypaigeshumate I commented two weeks ago and I can say, it gets a little bit better…but it’s still hard tho. I know that if he’s texting me again, I will crawl right back to him..and I wish that with my whole heart but it wears off! It really does! I catch myself thinking: nah I don’t want him anymore. It’s gets kinda boring wanting him and that makes it way easier! I think time will heal most of it, but never everything.
@@luciec6896 I think the best youtuber to learn from for manifesting someone is Dylan James. Hes not about fantasizing stuffs and more about focusing on you and your self concept that's the only thing that matters after lots of trial and errors that's what I understood and as someone who's recovered from this phase 80% i would say we learn from our mistakes it's a process of unlearning and learning again. You know the power lies in saying no to the most tempting thing out there. It takes immense discipline and practice but once it becomes default you are on another level. We never own anyone everyone is an individual and if we cannot love them for who they are and change them to our own needs then it's better to leave them alone I guess it's a hard pill to swallow we jst return them to God consider it that way but sometimes we think that this will work out idk how that will apply to a relationship that started well but could have been better if you were healed but for something not mutual its how it is ig. We get clear with what we want that's all. And stay detached.
Thank you