Відео

Damn! I just research the word Limerence and from what I’m gathering; I’m fucked. So because I was unloved, neglected, and unvalued in my childhood by my parents, my friends, and in my romantic life I have an obsession with love. Due to this obsession of love I seek any excuse to have those needs met and the first person who tries I obsess over. So basically I need to fully and completely isolate, reject romance, friendship, and connection when that’s all I ever wanted. So I have to kill what I want in order to survive? It said, “the state is one of acute intensity that outranks all other concerns in an individual’s life.” Lost my fiance from listening to manipulative friends. And limerence explains why I’ve been so depressed, suicidal, stagnant, and chronically unable to forget losing her. I literally quit my job, cut off all my friends, and became homeless on purpose yet I’m not the slightest bit happier. I crave a connection so badly that to be very honest, I am deeply disappointed in life. It feels pointless and mundane so I just sit in the sun, sweaty, unsmiling, unbathed, and the free spirit I once was is constantly screaming to come out yet I have no idea how to start. I have no idea what my “needs” even are. I hate my life, circumstances, whatever. I honestly want to kill my mother; the catalyst to all of these problems. Hate me for saying it but it’s honestly how I feel, and I have all right to feel this way.

Your video was just in time, thank you!

This is the first times a video on UA-cam, hurts me so much! I was unable to listen to your words and sentences continuously! Wow wow! Too hard and very true. Even my English is a failure too! I used "google translation" to write this comment! Thank you madam

You forgot something "You do´t understand me, I only mean well for you" Well it was not really like that she forst up beliefs on to me and i stopped talking to you, and the most necessary. She then insulted me and judged me. A lot changed during my apprenticeship as a baker. I only saw her briefly in the evenings. And at the weekend we went out to drink or I stayed overnight at my father's. They had already been separated/divorced for 10 years at that time. My mother doesn't want me anyway. And in the end I won and there Lies that the build around me. With physical abuse in childhood, you have to kill your parents emotionally and psychologically over and over again in order to be free forever. Some people can't do that and they do it physically or with themselves. But it's the same with emotional or psychological abuse. It's tough when it's all three.

Evita I really admire you so much for your excellent content

Evita, you say the things no one wants to say, but everyone needs to listen. Thank you ❤🎉 The need for control is a big problem nowadays... Control is an illusion, don't be fooled. The ONLY form of control that does truly exist is self-control. Everything else is pure conflict inducing behavior.

I remember my father having a very serious conversation with me, I was 6 or 7 years old and I don't remember I did anything wrong but all I remember he telling me I had to "sacrify" myself. They did sacrify me. Guess who was the scapegoat. That's right, me.

Damn. I grew up with a serious love for the performing arts. Dance, singing, acting. My mother started out by telling me I couldn’t take ballet because I was too fat for the leotards (I was 7). She then allowed me to join the church dance team when I was 11. I was pretty much only allowed to do religious based extra curricular activities. Every time I performed she made a slick joke about how I looked weird or almost fell or something. She would take away going to practices and classes as “punishment”…but then tell me I would never develop my talent because I didn’t practice enough. My dad would tell me my singing voice wasn’t good because I didn’t have “soul” and I still have insecurities about my voice to this day. My voice got me a scholarship to college, yet I still worry I don’t sound “black” enough. I would be so hurt after recitals seeing my mom congratulate and compliment every one else, yet make mean jokes about me. One memory I’ll never forget is my mom giving this little blonde girl a standing ovation after she danced at our church. That girl went on to star in a musical drama. I stopped doing what I loved after my grandmother passed when I was in college. Now I’m in my 30s. And stuck.

Thank you❤

No wonder I fell into a cult. I literally thought that was who she was describing in the beginning before I realized she was describing my mother 😢

Thank you Evita.

I'm sitting here crying like a baby as you describe my whole life!

the men who've liked me being small and stupid are small and stupid men. the man I ended up with is fascinating and impressive and wants a whole, thriving, powerful partner

I was with my limerent person for 2 years. We had been in love for years, but didn't know why on either end. Love at first sight. We broke up after 2 years of dating...now I'm stuck with this obsession and she is long gone. We carried feeling for each other almost 8 years prior any of this and were not any where near each other. She loved in a different state. What happened here?

They don't want you to be successesful...That's their excuse to keep you down on your knees! If you get a life away from them and be happy...they will still hate you but you will remind them of what a failure they are since they spent their lives trying to out shine you but couldn't, even when they had plenty of help and they had it planned...because everything was planned.

I have started this process of disconnecting from fantasy thinking and limerence. I am suddenly having all new addictions pop up like sugar eating. Any advice is welcome on this obvious transference

Thanks❤

🎯Imo ... Its the devils game he uses people to kill steal & destroy. Thank you Avita for this timely message its confirming to me as I start the healing process from many yrs of the inner scars of darkness & entrapment of witchcraft that steals the personality by molesting the soul & spirit ,just 6 weeks ago I finally was given understanding after consistently seeking answers to the root of my problems , then the painful revelation & realization of the origin came to me & it all made so much sense looking back throughout my life I think the anger has gone now, & I'm thankful ahead of time for miraculous working of the Divine Creator to release even the traces of trapped trauma from all of us who have suffered being trapped in wounded souls as we learn to discern the deep hidden things that we unknowingly allow to rule & rob our livelihood . I have found freedom & hope in trusting The Almighty who sustains my spirit day by day. I've purposed in my heart this life long lesson will not have been in vain. 💔💞💝

Is your codependency course still available?

𓆩🖤𓆪

This should get more views. This was helpful. Thank you

Being authentically yourself can cost you all of your personal relationships but it's such a nice place to live from. No longer trying to pander to people's emotions. Just saying what the fuck you want to say.

My limerence. I approached him and turns out he doesn't even know me 😢😅

you call me out so much i like it its important .

Thank u so much, i told my limerance object to block me, but i keep making these fantasies about he actually loved me, but i have to be in reality and work in myself

Good and gentle sense of humour in such a touchy area. :D It was great, thank you.

She's in denial. She can't accept or face the rejection I gave her. She probably thinks down the road something will happen but as time goes on I only want to be further and further away from her. She should be putting that energy into her child. She's not in a position to be chasing relationships. Life's in shambles. Being someones limerant object is annoying.

Our experiences matter.

its weird how from what i can see most comments are women but the most ppl that ive seen who are obsessively clingy from no self worth/ past trauma are guys. weird.

I’ve been on the other end of this and didn’t realise I was another project for this person, this same person who constantly complained about how she felt sorry and couldn’t abandon some of her other projects. The friendship ‘peaked’ during a really low point in my life and I was promptly dumped when my life started to take an upward swing a few years later. This person almost lived vicariously through my externalised difficulties, that were a manifestation of her own internal struggles.

Thank you for your wise and helpful words. This limerence action is a horrible feeling. Having a way to think about it is very useful. Also having the background of the reasons for this action to be engaged is extremely important. I needed to hear this. I can move away from this action which has a hold on me. I can let it go. I can heal the root obstacles to authentic self love.

This was fantastic.

With lots of inner work most of it on.my own I have rejected all the people I have encounter because they were narcissists and I did a good job setting boundaries or just leaving, not reacting and I am not as much of a people please as I have been but knowing people when you are old is not easy and much harder in this time when people are glued to their cell phones, myself included. I just don't know how to get out of freeze response. I had expectations when I went no contact with my whole family and left the city. I have been three years in new city and I have not found a single soul I could relate with in a healthy way. I feel alienated and excluded, and broke.