I don’t need a woman to do my laundry, or cook, or clean, or set my appointments, or any of that stuff, but if you don’t do anything around the house except make my life more difficult, then I'd rather be by myself.
@stinkypitz0005 happily so, but I've also been in a few relationships. Thankfully, only one was toxic and that was my first one (high-school so I don't really blame her.)
@@joshuatoms7664 Nope, all of them. Without, the relationships will falter. Doesn't matter if this is the relationship between a couple, parents and children, employees and bosses, it's always the same. Fun fact: Most people that quit a job don't actually quit the job, but they quit their superiors.
That's how a healthy work relationship/partnership should work. Your kids should serve you to? There is no.problem in doing things for eachother, but it is fish love if you are serving.
To be fair, even as a grown ass man, if there is a burglar, we are jumping out the window, ain't no fending off happening. The guy has a high chance of carrying a weapon, and I have terrible luck
@@thedevilsadvocate788speak for yourself - i have no less than 15 rounds of hollow points, a 12 GA under the bed, and a plate carrier with level 3 plates ready to go in my closet should such an unwanted person feel free to enter my home without my permission
@@thedevilsadvocate788 If you have a family or someone to protect, it is your duty to do everything in your power to protect them. Even if your scared, or may get hurt or even may die. As a grown ass man you biologically have the best chances of surviving due to our increased levels of testosterone and therefore muscle development.
As a husband, I felt every bit of this video. Salute to you for the awareness. Granted I don’t need my wife to do any of this but a small gesture every once in a while is nice.
More than just rent. If she ain't cooking he is, so she better be paying half if not more for everything. Gotta contribute equally, so if one partner is working and doing household labour, you're either working just as much and doing just as much household labour or working even more. Part of me can't help but miss the times before the 1970s, when everyone's roles were more easily defined. Lots of feminists have 0 interest in switching roles, they just don't want to have to do anything.
@@hopeseekrahhhh my guy, you fell for the pussy trap I see. She just wants your life style and your wallet. You should sit down with her with a different approach, see what motivates her in life and how you can help her get there. Be stern in the fact you will not support this life style if taken advantage. of… Remember man, the “there’s plenty of fish in the sea” is a real thing! If anything just do you and be single man! You be amazed at how great it is. I left my ex after 6 years for the same thing. As soon as a I left her she all of a sudden started working and getting her goals in order…..🤷🏻♂️all she would ever do for me was put the clothes in the wash. it was up to me to dry and fold them, cook, clean, work 13hours a day, etc….. while she was out shopping with her sisters and frolicking around LA taking pictures. You know what you gotta do. Just don’t drag it on as long as I did. Leaving her was the hardest thing I’ve ever done and had to recover from in my life! Almost two years to get my head right again. Good luck🤙🏽
Him: I don't work at a job and I don't maintain the lawn and I don't fix the car, house, appliances. I don't defend my wife, I let her take care of the fights. She probably started them.
Every guy brags to his buddies about the things he has not done for his wive . “The old lady wanted me to mow the lawn on a match day. Well, I sure told her!” “She won’t make me visit that nagging sister of hers. I am no social worker.” “Sure great to be out with you on this fishing trip, boys! Can you imagine the old lady wabted me to help our daughter with her school project this weekend? Not in my free time!”
My aunts would tell me that I shouldn't do the cooking and cleaning in our house growing up. But my dad was working long hours (and he cannot cook, anything) so I figured why not help out. Dad was so much happier when he'd get home to an actual prepared meal, he would help me put away the laundry, clean up the kitchen. I believe this gives me a better insight to what married life might look like when I find someone.
It’s annoying working way to many hours . And getting home and hearing you don’t do your fair share, I’ve always helped out. But when I’m doing the majority of everything it makes me feel like I’m being used .
Yeah, if you love someone you help them, and ideally they help you. So many people do sound toxic today saying things they wont do, that would prove they dont love their partner, only what their partner can do for them. Man or woman, gender doesnt matter. A relationship is two people working towards a goal.
Chores should be split, its one of the biggest perks of a relationship. EVERYONE has to do laundry, eat, clean, make money, pay bills, fix the house, shop, etc. Why not split the chores. But todays world has taught people to just think about me, me , me. No wonder men just aren’t getting married to start with.
Actually not true... i know a lot of men who brag that they neuer once changed a diaper oder vacuumed the house... and this includes my dad and my fil... and thats one of the many reasons they are both not in Our lifes
You're right, I've never heard a man bragging about things he doesn't do for his wife, but women do this all the time. If you love your spouse, show it. Plain and simple
I have absolutely heard some guys saying they will do things so poorly that their partners never ask them to do anything ever again.. how is that not the same? 😂
It’s one where both contribute all they can. Equally relies on measuring and scoring what you do, and frankly if you’re ever able to tell that it’s equal you’ve been focused far too much on the measuring and not enough on the doing and appreciating.
Nothing is equal in a relationship. What you do is exchange wants and needs from each other depending on how much you value them and how much you are willing to sacrifice. Equality is an ideal sold to younger people who don't know any better and just say "yes feminism" and end up bullying the other for not being equal. Women have more value than men when they are young, but struggle to be useful when they get older. Where is the equality then?
Hubby and i have swapped roles. I am the breadwinner and hubby takes care of the house. This works for us. I enjoy dealing with the money making sure bills are paid and he enjoys house work. But i still help out. He cooks, i do the dishes. He does laundry, i sweep. He does outside labor, i pay the bills. Its about working as a team and catering to each others strengths but picking up for each others weaknesses. We are best friends and have a solid friendship underlying our marriage. That is the only reason we are still together and our relationship survived the death of our child. If you waste time fighting about this crap you'll never get anywhere. Help each other. If you see a dirty dish, wash it. See pet poop? Pick it up! Getting hungry? They likely are too. Cook for both of you. Half the time I go to do something hubby says with a big smile "beat you to it!" And then I do the same for him. The "competition' becomes a force for positive and loving relationships not fighting and petty arguments. Tada! Its always easier to blame someone else then to look in the mirror. To BOTH men and women. Time to grow up.
I Love this comment from you!! Husband/wife, roommates, and even coworkers. I can't stand the not my job mentality anywhere in life. Its part of just living in society. If you want to ONLY for yourself go live in a mountain cabin. Bless you
I love this. I thought that was the whole point. I can't find a woman like this because I am sick of workplace politics and drama but I have to work with women who honestly half-ass their jobs. One day at a time
Women, if you want traditional things, be traditional. If you want to be a feminist then earn money like one. You can’t mix them up and have a good life.
@@rodgerhempfing2921 I’m not single. It’s just that my man respects me, I respect him, and we split up the chores and finances equitably according to income levels, energy levels and just what needs to get done. I’m not his maid, he’s not my butler.
@@nehirovuc7575 if they're both working? What about if they both pay for actual housing and other household stuff? Because if she spends all her money on herself then her working isn't relevant is it?
@@justbplz its good to have self love you know that right like if my future woman spent her own money making herself fancy id have no problem with that but if she started to spend my money then i would have a problem but being selfish isnt always a bad thing even in relationships now if it is all the time then it can be but if the woman splurges on herself every now and then to make herself happy i see no problem with that
For example, the Workers in USA are almost for 50% of them womens, so womens seems to work as often as mens. But they still have to do household labor for free like inferior humans.
@@turtle12369 Most men work and are able to pay their bills yet still are expected to do free household labor. Women should expect men to fix anything if that's the attitude they have.
@@flechette3782 fix what? How often? How about mind-numbing DAILY crap women do all over the world? Planning, shopping, loading and unloading stuff, meal prep, dishes, laundry, cleaning, appointments, paperwork, child care, elderly care? How much of that burden do you help your wife carry?
@@turtle12369 "meal prep, dishes, laundry, cleaning" etc. is EXACTLY what this skit is about, if you paid attention. The woman doesn't want to do these things, and is proud of not doing these things. That is what the skit is about. *I* am saying that in addition to the skit's point women STILL want the man to do their traditional obligations...like fixing things around the house. Basically, if this was consistent, the man should tell the woman, "fix the sink yourself".
Not this clip, but a previous one, I had to watch it again because first time round it got about half way through and the dog entered. That distracted me from actually listening to the video!
In our house, whoever works from home that day when the laundry basket is full does the laundry. So sometimes I do the laundry, and sometimes my fiancee
@DarthestWiffiest truly, it is reflective of my entire life experience, and you may judge my entire character from one UA-cam comment. I am in awe of your skill and applaud your wisdom.
Sometimes women have a problem with men and how they handle the clothes. Some men can also be very particular with the softners and detergents used as well as how the laundry is folded. I think it's up for every household to decide.
Exactly! We also share responsibilities, if she is exhausted from work, I take care of her and vice versa. It's a partnership, we both provide for eachother. I would love to rather do my 12h work shifts and not worry that much about home chores and she could stay at home if she wished, but she would rather split everything 50/50. Everyone is different and we have to accept eachother for who we are, in my case I split things like she wants, some of you may instead do it like the malr counterpart desires, all up to yourselves, as long as you confirm with your partner how you wish to proceed with your partnership. :)
Well said, in marriage you help one another because you love one another. Everyone has different things to go to keep the marriage going and to have a happy marriage.
I would have never agreed to become a housewife or to be a servant to my husband. We were partners. We both earned money and we both didn't like household chores, so we shared those. When I was home early, I did the cooking , when I came home late, I had a meal waiting for me. When my husband had been the cook all week, I would do all the cleaning, no problem. I was better at financial and biurocratic tasks, so I did most of those , my husband knew how to repair electrical devices. There are many ways to share the work that comes with having a home. No side should be exploited, but each should put in effort to make things work and show the other some love and consideration.
if you love someone, you'll do anything for them - from cleaning their shit and vomit off the floor to changing their period pads when they are bedridden with a 104F fever. it's not about being a "domestic labor force"; it's about doing the hard stuff for someone you LOVE!
If your husband adopted the same attitude and stopped doing anything "for you," then you'd change your tune very quickly. Where's the symbiosis in relationships like this gone?
A certain political movement in the world has done this specifically to lower birth rates. Same reason they are pushing lgbt stuff. To destroy the family unit, the only thing more important than government. Destroy that, and you can form society to your whim.
And this is exactly why MGTOW is becoming more and more successfull... nobody with a clear mind can bear that ideology any longer, it has become way too extremist Stay safe guys, watch out for those 304's!
I get it if you both work full time. But if only one of you is bringing home the bacon so the bills get paid, the other better be busy with something of equivalent difficulty. That might be child rearing-and I honor that. But it better not be nothing at all.
Splitting the work around the house even if they both work. The husband still has to clean the gutters, take out the trash, mow the grass, shovel the snow, keep up with the cars. Women always forget the things a man does around the house
But also women and men have different standards of when a job has to be done. Like how clean a house is, or how many times you should clean a house, or how much effort should be put into a meal(like wow Dino nuggies are apparently a thing? Is microwaving even cooking?), etc. Women love delegating work to men to do shit around the house because they don't have to do shit, but once their dinner is criticized because it's microwaved shit, then it's a fucking problem?
I disagree they are an individual why should they do all that stuff. I mean if they made the mess they should clean it up but you do your own laundry and she can do hers if she wants to she can do yours but i would only expect my woman to do her own portion because i like being independent and doing my laundry my way.
@@kylebonini6117 As long as everyone is contributing, each couple can work out a division of duties that suits them. I have always done my own laundry because I don’t like people touching my clothes. Plenty of other families find it works best for one person to run laundry for the whole family. Each couple can make their own decision, but if you’re not working and sacrificing for your partner, I assure you things will eventually fall apart or become rancorous.
Oh, I don’t know how I never noticed this. It’s true it seems like people are really proud that they aren’thelping their partners. It used to be just women, but I’m also kind of noticing A lot of men are proud they aren’t helping their wives with certain chores or rent.
THIS!!! If he’s going to do it all himself, the only thing she’s useful for is sex and he can get that anywhere with someone who’s less of a pain in the a$$.
The ONLY "role" a wife should play is a mistress' one...Being a spoilt, happy and thus *horny* "freak in the sheets"... 😊😊Any kind of domestic labour is supposed to be outsourced... This arrangement is the ONLY way to keep the fire of passion burning...Every guy rejecting this arrangement exposes themselves as a prospective abuser and exploiter... 😮
Yeah exactly, it's not like women have to adhere to traditional gender roles when they're in a relationship. If you don't provide anything and likewise he doesn't provide anything for you, are you even in a relationship?
Only if she has a job and her husband doesn't (which is rare), then she has the right to not to do those things. But if they both work, she should contribute in both expenses and house work. And if she doesn't work and her husband does, she should do all the housework.
I got lucky. I work 40 - 84 hrs a week to provide at home. Those 84 hrs of labor are killer. My wife is a lifesaver, sometimes literally. The sleep deprivation is dangerous while driving. She's driven me home, cooked, cleaned, washed clothes, even helped my school on an occasion. When you love each other, you give each other everything you have and keep going. Thank you for helping lost souls find their commitment to love, and to finding something worth dying for.
I've never understood why feminists think the term 'pick me' is an insult lol. Good women want to be 'picked' by good men. That's how the process of finding a solid relationship works.
It doesn’t mean you did get picked. A pick me is someone who does everything with being cool to guys in mind. It’s the opposite of a girls girl. It’s the worst. No one wants to be a pick me who’s “one of the guys” and laughs at other women at the women’s expense. That’s what a pick me is. “Ew I could never wear makeup. That’s so pathetic. I actually like myself” in a room of guys going “right?” Is an example of a pick me. Pick me pick me I’m not like other girls! I don’t wear makeup. You get it? And before you hate on me back, yes I’m a feminist, I believe men and women should have equal rights and I’m pro choice because I don’t believe women should have dead children stuck inside them like has been happening nonstopv in America since roe got over turned. I’m happily married to the best man ever and I cook and clean for him happily. But no one likes a pick me NLOG.
If in courting a woman she complains about men and says all that she won't do for you, run fellas. I have tried to.understand, hung in there and hoped to heal it, but you can't. They have to learn the hard way. This is the "I am the table" personified. Billie is great though ❤
Or dont try to heal something that isnt broken I don't think woman should be stay at home barefoot and pregnant all the time those were 1900 values lets leave them in the past
Sometimes this creator has good points but this one…nah women are fully justified to be outspoken about not following societal conventions around delegated household labour.
@@maher7361no men dont have to be providers. they can be the ones staying at home being the parent and the house husband if they want too. Nothing wrong with that at all
This needs context...is she not doing it bc she also works? 🤔 If both are making money then both should do housework but if one person is staying home then they should do the housework. If there are kids in the picture then both should take care of things whether theres a stay at home parent or not otherwise the stay at home parent technically never gets a break. Once you have kids, both parents should be working morning to night whether its making money or doing housework. Kids are a 24/7 job. (Of course take breaks and get a babysitter or other help as needed if you have that privilege)
Presumably, you're also earning income. If you are a housewife, you're your husband's employee, keeping his house and raising his heirs. You want respect, get a job and earn it.
Everyone says love is lost well yeah if you expect you partner to do 100% of the house work just because you got to work and earn money then of course there will be no love but thats not what i want i want a relationship filled with love and happiness
When i was working, the household duties were shared/ equally distributed (we were both full time) Now I’m home and I will completely undertake the duties myself because he is working his a$$ off and providing my ability to stay home and not worry financially. It is still an EQUAL distribution of tasking just different duties now.
Since you worked, and are not entitled, you have a realistic idea of what having a boss and meeting quarterly goals is actually like. So you can also be a great partner when you don't work for money and hold down the domestic side. And you can also respect your partner's contributions without throwing pity parties for yourself and demanding that he do even more. Those are the ingredients that are often missing.
@@DrJamesBWood He has also lived alone before and knows what goes into keeping a house so he is very appreciative and respectful of my work as well. We have a wonderful balance and relationship. I could not ask for more. ❤️
@@heyitsqueso3008Yes, THIS!!! It's why I've ALWAYS worked outside the home. I've seen how unappreciative SOME men are when they have a "traditional wife" at home doing everything to maintain a house & raise the children and they come home and treat their wives like shit for not having a job. They don't acknowledge the hard work that goes into maintaining it all.
@@noorsmith6186but men nowdays wanna be princesses so bad and almost every woman work. Men like you aren't needed anymorr. As if why would I have an useless husband if I already work and can pay for my house. I mean it is better to be alone and oay for yourseld than being your boyfriend's slave while doinf 50/50 how most of the women sadly do nowdays.even before. Be a man and provide with your responsebility and some integrity.
@@Someone-qi1rr The point of my comment was to show the hypocrisy. I WANT to pay for everything, and I will. But I refuse to get into a relationship with someone who only wants “equality” when it benefits them. The kind of woman who makes life pleasant and easy to be in a relationship with, won’t refer to it like “slavery”. It’s only “slavery” when it’s for your husband. Working a full time job, is harder than maintaining a home. So much harder. It’s not even close. Al your comment indicates is that women entering the workforce has decreased their level of respect, and therefore attraction for men as a whole. No surprise relationships have gone to complete shit nowadays. As a woman, here’s all you need for a successful relationship. Sleep with him often, be pleasant, and don’t argue. You will literally never have a relationship issue in your life respecting your man. But something tells me your initial comment indicates you’re the opposite.
@@noorsmith6186 with that I can agree. I mean we all should be equal and have same rights (exclude criminals). It is slavery if your husband is doing 5% while you are 95%. Sadly saw it happen with my grandma. She shared the house with my grandad who did nothing for it. She build it up herself and spent money on it also she was caring for children. My grandad just drank, and smoked. I suspect he also cheated but idk. The point is now it is easier to avoid those men. I am programmed to love my grandad but the kinda of person he was is terrible. Now he event got her in debt. She is still working while he retired 10 years ago. She also cleans and cooks. He still finds a way to insult her when she tells him to clean himself. When you know men like these your whole life marriage isn't all about love anymore. It is a lifestyle that needs to be suitable to both of the parties. It is easier to fall in love if that person fits your lifestyle than to be already in love with person that just hates or cannot have similiar lifestyle. Everybody is doing full time jobs nowdays. Honestly being a housewife is a job that has no vacation days. It is 24/7. I will only be when I get pregnant cause the least man can do is provide for his wife when she is pregnant and when a child is very young. But some cannot even do that. I respect hard working men, and women. In general, all people whp suceed. But most of the people do minimum wage jobs, have average strength and we cannot rely on few individuals. It is way harded to be pregnant and women in general than to work for a few hours as a man. It is a simple fact. We are dealing with hormons every month until middle age (when we lose period forever). I would be proud, respectable and would support my husband. Cause I don't date worthless men anymore. You know the times have changed to worse when men cannot even pay for a first date they invited you to. Luckily never had it happen to me but I hear enough from girls online. It is sad. Bar for the men is so low nowdays that it is embarassing how some even can fall beneath it. I will blame the podcasts for that. You all love to say women are the ones who gossip while that is what you do.most of the day. Not to mention, shaming single mothers but those assholes of a "husbands" are fine for leaving their children and wives? That is why I love 4B. Us women won't complain about needing men, but you will be the ones crying about lonely men epidemic.
@@noorsmith6186 I mean, if you want someone who wouldn't argue with you, be pleasant and sleep with you often, just find a prostitute. Why marry someone when you could just pay someone to do whatever you want?
Chivalry is not what people think it is… it is a medieval knights code of honor to never kill fleeing enemies, women or children. Somehow it got turned into opening doors or whatever people think a man should do today.
Why should she do anything? He married her. His house now belongs to her. If he doesn't like it, she'll just divorce him and kick him out, and he'll pay her part of his income and like it.
What man labor do you mean? I have a diificult time thinking of anything a man would traditionally do around the house and as a sole provider for his family that a modern woman cannot do. Either herself or with hired help. Besides, you know, being a decent partner and someone you physically and emotionally are connected to. So just to be clear, not attacking you or anything, just genuinely wanted to know what exactly you refer to when you say "man labor". Curios to hear you out.
@@lavenderxana Yard work, house maintenance ( carpentry, plumbing, electrical, roofing , painting , ECT) , moving furniture for redecorating, small item repair, auto maintenance and repair, killing bugs and other vermin, physical security, emotional labor of support a wife. While still having to pay for almost every because most couples still have men earning more money. Ps Most things that are gross or dirty.
@@lavenderxana"that a modern woman can't do" Yeah, let me know how women go about having a sofa on the third floor. Also I assume you don't mean men when you say "hired help" because these feminist narratives are exactly what's destroying the traditional roles in society. They're giving you enough excuses to go on about why you can do anything a man can, when that's just not true. You're just privileged beyond an average man and you don't even realize it
@@anilin6353puhlease that is stuff that men should not be expected to do if they don't want to or if they can't i got no idea how plumbing works or carpentry etc i can help move furniture but thats about it on your list why should men be expected to do this?
I have absolutely no problem with women being equal at work, and at home ... I have a lot of problems with women expecting a man to work and support them while they do nothing. If you don't have an outside job, then the house and taking care of your husband is your job.
I think if you make a mess you should be held responsible for that mess and clean it up yourself not wait for someone to clean it up for you aka do your own damn laundry clean your own damn dishes etc split the cleaning of the house fifty fifty one person cleans one half of the house the other cleans the other half etc.
@@kylebonini6117 Do both people have an outside job?? If so, why would you think a woman should spend her days lounging around or running with friends while HE works to support her?? I'm not saying he has permission to be a slob, but the major housekeeping and cooking should be the stay-at-home spouse's responsibility, that would usually be the wife.
@@lauriivey7801 no he is an independent person trying to work and live alongside another independent person if you want a housekeeper or whatever go back to your mom a wife should never have to be a second mom if she doesn't want to be. You want dinner on the table so bad cook it yourself life isn't just hard for you just because you work unless you communicate everyday talk about feelings and shit then you have no idea what's going on inside her head she may be really depressed and hurt or she may be really happy just because "oh I'm exhausted from work" doesn't automatically mean since she isn't working she can't be exhausted life is exhausting for everyone. Now if SHE WANTS to cook you dinner she can SHE SHOULD NOT HAVE TOO IF SHE DOESN'T WANT TOO
@@kylebonini6117 So she should sit on her ass and be catered to?? That is NOT independent. If she's not working, she has at least 8 hours to fill ... she might as well be productive.
My bf and I aren't even married yet and he mows my lawn and even came out at 3:30am to rescue me from a bat in my house. I cook him meals every chance I get, and I have offered to do his laundry (he has yet to take me up on it, but I'll wear him down eventually! 😂). Serving him is not something I do because he is incapable. It's something I do because I love him. It's something he does for me because he loves me. That's what you do for the one you love. You help take care of each other and actively work toward improving each other's lives. Your goal should be for your partner's life to be better BECAUSE you are in it. If you each strive to serve one another then you'll both be getting your needs met. You'll both be a blessing, and you'll both be blessed by the servant heart of your partner.
My guy and I both cook, clean, do laundry, and help each other out with housework. We also both take care of our dogs. That's what real couples do! If women want the man to contribute and take care of them (& their family), then women need to actually contribute to the household as well. "Domestic labor force" my a**!!
My wife cooks and cleans for me because I provide for her and protect her and our children. She serves me and I serve her. That’s the beauty of a symbiotic relationship.
@@daefaron I'd argue that it's the other way around - a few good apples can't save a barrel full of rotting decay. Those calling themselves feminists today are overwhelmingly misandrists.
@@daefaron It's not "some bad apples," it's the overwhelming majority. Feminism is equality with men... but only with the good stuff. You never see feminists protesting for selective service for women, or equality in divorce & child custody court, etc. Only stuff like equal pay.
I'm pretty sure this can be even simpler: people cling to things that let them shirk responsibility and be lazy. If there's an ideology that lets you profit off some hapless clown serving you, some people will take it.
Many women are like this unfortunately. And as a man, I've retorted more than once to this attitude the following: Why exactly would I have you in my life when you provide no positive benefits for me? Sex isn't the end all and be all, and that's a mutual exchange when it happens.
when we started doing calculations of who's giving more or less, and when marriage turned into a contract instead of unconditional loyalty the whole man woman relationship turned south. It's not about pride and equivalent exchange, it's about giving when we can and bearing when the other can't, both partners alike.
My husband macking money and I growing veggies,chicken for meat ,pigs,chick for eggs,ducks,cooking,cleaning washing,take care of kids,house,shoping groceries,paing the bills,organize the birthdays,backing and I'm happy!
Men do a lot of stuff for their women, just in a different way. For example when she asks you to feed the dogs, pick up bread, take out the trash, mowed the lawns or go with her shopping just to name a few. The truth is we rather be drinking beer and chilling in front of the TV, playing games or even being with friends.😮 Women and men can contribute in their own unique ways. It shouldn't be exactly equals in every way. In fact, not saying that women are just sexual object but that is one thing men need from their women that he cant get anywhere else. So, using sex as a weapon is a very cheap shot.
The point is she should not have to ask you she should not ask you to do those things as a big boy you should just do them and you know what we would rather be with our friends and play games too so don’t think those are big tasked, they are not. It’s also your trash it’s also bread you’re going to eat. I’m assuming it’s also your dog or the family dog don’t act like it’s all hers it’s not.
I fall in between these two idealisms. If she works, they should split the household chores. If she stays home, it makes sense for her to handle the household duties to lessen his load.
Is it still a 50/50 split if she does 20 behind a JC Penny’s cash register, and he does 54 at the construction site or on the landscaping crew? Because I see *a lot* of “Working is working” arguments online, and without extensive communication and a fundamentally non-legalistic approach to this issue, things get bad, quick.
@@shawnpanzegraf5642if she’s working a part time job and he has a full time job then yeah she’s at home more, so she’d have more time to get more done anyways Same thing applies if she works full time and he doesn’t. Whoever is at home more naturally does more around the house because they have more time to do it
@@benc.3128 In general, perfectly fair. The only potential contention remaining is both partners working an equal amount of time, but one has a considerably more physically draining job than the other.
Do not forget to appreciate him and give him the occasional videogame or tickets to the big game and some beer money. Also new clothes and hairdresser and maybemanicure, those hands needs maintenance to maintain the house. Soft guy era, drizzle drizzle kings.
The purpose of a relationship is sharing. You don't have to stand behind him, serving him. You don't have to stand in front of him, protecting him. But if both of you stand side by side, taking on the world together, it makes the load lighter for both.
I’m a bloke, I cook (wife cooks too but generally I do the meat and fish), clean (wife hoovers and I polish), do our laundry, clean the cars (wife does the inside), do the gardening (wife mows the lawn), change the sheets (wife makes the bed daily). Wife does diary and I comply. She does what she’s good at and I do too, I do what she doesn’t want to do and she does what I don’t want to do. Wouldn’t have it any other way
A relationship is a 2 way street. It doesn't matter who does what tasks or what the roles are. What matters is that people agree on a fair division of labor so you support each other and are able to raise a good family.
I do things for my wife. She does things for me. That's how marriage works. I understand wanting to be equal, I really do. I believe that men and women are equal. But I also believe that feminists right now want to be better than men to "even the score." Thing is, "An eye for an eye just makes the world blind."
I had this realization a couple of days ago. Tell me if this makes any sense, everyone. Wow, I think I just had an insight. We all are one family in spirit, and it is the same with a soul "mate." we are still judged individually as we struggle as a family to strengthen the spirit. That is why we find a soul "mate" who we have matching personalities with, and we struggle to expand our love to have each other's backs in times of need and not to judge each other and to bring into creation what "our" "dreams" are in the "living" That way, the soul mate of each other can always struggle with who their true self is and who they wish to be in our new life that is yet to come in omega.
The issue is that loving reciprocity is being equated with enabling someone. That pov also assumes that a man does not know how to do his own laundry etc. That's something you find out and communicate about while picking someone. You have every right to reject that in that phase. If you choose to marry without proper vetting you are partially responsible for the results.
I believe some feminists really dont know what feminism is. It's just equal legal rights and to have the same opportunities. All the other things are actually personal choices. To have a job after getting married or not. To have kids or not. The way you divide chores and errands with your partner. All personal choices. I understand women really suffered because they were treated badly by men that they use this behavior as an armor, to protect themselves. And some men who have low self steem get offended when women say " you dont have to open the door for me, I can do it myself" and instead of replying " don't worry, I do this for my mom, a friend, poeple that I care. But if you don't like it, that's ok :)" and move on, they literally disrespect every single woman saying " equal rights, right?" But acts of kindness go both ways. I can open a door for a man, a woman, an elderly, a child. People need to remember that kindness has been and will always be part of humand kind. ❤
"I believe some feminists really dont know what feminism is." This is true. "It's just equal legal rights and to have the same opportunities." Nope. That is not what feminism is. There was a large feminist movement in the 60s that had that goal, but they had huge, rapid success and the movement mostly fell apart as women actually started going to work and lost interest. The movement was already radicalizing, with feminists saying crazy things like all women had to become lesbians to liberate women. The radical feminists got jobs in academia and created "women's studies." There they began to develop insane theories about how to dismantle the patriarchy. They began spreading until every school at a women's studies program. Then in 1995, Judith Butler published "Gender Trouble" and started a war in feminism, between feminist who believed that women are adult human females, and feminists who believed that the concept of women (and even female) were social constructs invented by men to oppress women. The still relatively sane radical feminists lost, they became "TERFs" -- tran-excusionary radical feminists -- and were kicked out mainstream feminsim.. Now feminism is a movement whose goal is to destroy the entire concept of women. It's also become impossible to be a feminist without embracing the whole progressive program of destroying whiteness, maleness, heterosexuality, and Christianity.
If your definition of feminism is accepted, then it's already been achieved... which takes it away as a tool for activists to manipulate people. That's why you can't get a feminist to tell you what feminism is in any concrete way, that 1) Hasn't already been achieved or 2) isn't just a form of misandry. People don't go around calling themselves "abolitionists" because.. well... that's everyone.
I dated a feminist, we share the house responsabilities. She never one time say that being a feminist ment NOT do house duties. Thats NOT what feminism means.
Just because your a girl or a wife does not mean you have to cook or clean or do any of that shit if you want a cooked meal do it your damn self stop being selfish and expecting things to be handed to you like your back with your mom
@@kylebonini6117 Sure, and in exchange you’re also never going to expect your boyfriend or husband to do anything extra for you. It’s only fair after all.
@@CdrChaos I mean I will always go extra but no I will not expect my wife or husband to ever go the extra mile as I don't need them too I am fine with them just being around me. I don't get your point
It's not about serving anyone, but simply dividing tasks. And if one partner goes to work, that doesn't mean that he only has to go to work and also definitely has to do household chores, but if the other partner doesn't go to work, Regardless of gender, the partner takes care of the majority of the household.
Actually, these are facts. I stopped doing relationships years ago since I already have to fully take care of myself, which is easy; I just removed the need to take care of a parasitic co-dweller as well. When she won’t clean, cook, do dishes, and grocery shop, she’s automatically not cleaning up behind herself and that’s intolerable if I’m providing all the income too.
Forget the modern buzzwords! Doing the little things for a man make it easy for him to do the big things for you. Yes, he can make his own sandwich, and you can rotate your own tires. Yes, he can wash his own clothes, and you can fall in the toilet when he leaves the seat up. Simple.
I’ve never understood this “fall in the toilet when he leaves the seat up”. You go in, see the seat is up, and put it down. He goes in, sees the seat is down, puts it up. Where is the problem?
@@robinharwood5044 LOL, yes, to men that is the definition of common sense. For a lot of women who can be considered entitled, it is expected for the man to be considerate of a woman's wishes. What they fail to realize is that it's a non issue for us, but a statement of affection to them.
I am so over these conversations from both the men and women's sides. Its not complicated, people. Just maturely discuss your views and values and if they don't align and/or you aren't willing to make reasonable concessions, move on. Stop hating on each other. Its so dehumanizing that compassion, kindness and understanding of different viewpoints without attacking each other is becoming archaic.
I don’t need a woman to do my laundry, or cook, or clean, or set my appointments, or any of that stuff, but if you don’t do anything around the house except make my life more difficult, then I'd rather be by myself.
Yup I would like a women who can cook though idc about the others
A man can only shoulder so much
💯 on that… and I’m happy as could be without someone making my life harder and their problems mine😂😂😂😂😂 no thanks
It sounds like your single.
@stinkypitz0005 happily so, but I've also been in a few relationships. Thankfully, only one was toxic and that was my first one (high-school so I don't really blame her.)
Some people tend to forget that relationships require both parties to support eachother.
*Most
@@joshuatoms7664 Nope, all of them.
Without, the relationships will falter. Doesn't matter if this is the relationship between a couple, parents and children, employees and bosses, it's always the same.
Fun fact: Most people that quit a job don't actually quit the job, but they quit their superiors.
@@cy-oneI think he meant "most" as in "most people tend to forget" not just "some people"
The chief tenet of feminism is narcissism - turned up to blast
Both should serve the one another. This is how love works.
Nailed it bro, and couples need to find what the best way that works for them.
She said shes not his assistant oh boy does she have alot og growing up to do
That's how a healthy work relationship/partnership should work. Your kids should serve you to? There is no.problem in doing things for eachother, but it is fish love if you are serving.
Happy spouse, happy house.
It’s literally in the word relationship… it’s about RELATING to one another. Amazing that we have lost the entire plot.
"Id never fix a car, or take out the trash, or fend off that burglar....shes a grown ass woman!"
To be fair, even as a grown ass man, if there is a burglar, we are jumping out the window, ain't no fending off happening.
The guy has a high chance of carrying a weapon, and I have terrible luck
@@thedevilsadvocate788
This guy is French. 🏳️🏳️
@@Sandman_10372
I take it you are Belgian?
@@thedevilsadvocate788speak for yourself - i have no less than 15 rounds of hollow points, a 12 GA under the bed, and a plate carrier with level 3 plates ready to go in my closet should such an unwanted person feel free to enter my home without my permission
@@thedevilsadvocate788 If you have a family or someone to protect, it is your duty to do everything in your power to protect them.
Even if your scared, or may get hurt or even may die.
As a grown ass man you biologically have the best chances of surviving due to our increased levels of testosterone and therefore muscle development.
As a husband, I felt every bit of this video. Salute to you for the awareness.
Granted I don’t need my wife to do any of this but a small gesture every once in a while is nice.
Not cooking, not cleaning, not managing the household?
*Better be paying some rent!*
*the feminist ideology disappears when she must do something she don't want to*
More than just rent. If she ain't cooking he is, so she better be paying half if not more for everything. Gotta contribute equally, so if one partner is working and doing household labour, you're either working just as much and doing just as much household labour or working even more.
Part of me can't help but miss the times before the 1970s, when everyone's roles were more easily defined. Lots of feminists have 0 interest in switching roles, they just don't want to have to do anything.
@@christopherrto i wanna buy you a beer
@@hopeseekr Then she better bust out a broom 🤣
@@hopeseekrahhhh my guy, you fell for the pussy trap I see.
She just wants your life style and your wallet.
You should sit down with her with a different approach, see what motivates her in life and how you can help her get there. Be stern in the fact you will not support this life style if taken advantage.
of…
Remember man, the “there’s plenty of fish in the sea” is a real thing!
If anything just do you and be single man! You be amazed at how great it is.
I left my ex after 6 years for the same thing. As soon as a I left her she all of a sudden started working and getting her goals in order…..🤷🏻♂️all she would ever do for me was put the clothes in the wash. it was up to me to dry and fold them, cook, clean, work 13hours a day, etc….. while she was out shopping with her sisters and frolicking around LA taking pictures.
You know what you gotta do. Just don’t drag it on as long as I did. Leaving her was the hardest thing I’ve ever done and had to recover from in my life! Almost two years to get my head right again.
Good luck🤙🏽
"Does he brag about the things he doesn't do for you?" PERFECTION.
Him: I don't work at a job and I don't maintain the lawn and I don't fix the car, house, appliances. I don't defend my wife, I let her take care of the fights. She probably started them.
@@jaketripp7934 "she probably started them" - Genius :D
Every guy brags to his buddies about the things he has not done for his wive .
“The old lady wanted me to mow the lawn on a match day. Well, I sure told her!”
“She won’t make me visit that nagging sister of hers. I am no social worker.”
“Sure great to be out with you on this fishing trip, boys! Can you imagine the old lady wabted me to help our daughter with her school project this weekend? Not in my free time!”
Exactly
@@DH-rj2kv How do you know that?
My aunts would tell me that I shouldn't do the cooking and cleaning in our house growing up. But my dad was working long hours (and he cannot cook, anything) so I figured why not help out. Dad was so much happier when he'd get home to an actual prepared meal, he would help me put away the laundry, clean up the kitchen. I believe this gives me a better insight to what married life might look like when I find someone.
It’s annoying working way to many hours . And getting home and hearing you don’t do your fair share, I’ve always helped out. But when I’m doing the majority of everything it makes me feel like I’m being used .
Yeah, if you love someone you help them, and ideally they help you.
So many people do sound toxic today saying things they wont do, that would prove they dont love their partner, only what their partner can do for them.
Man or woman, gender doesnt matter.
A relationship is two people working towards a goal.
Chores should be split, its one of the biggest perks of a relationship. EVERYONE has to do laundry, eat, clean, make money, pay bills, fix the house, shop, etc. Why not split the chores.
But todays world has taught people to just think about me, me , me. No wonder men just aren’t getting married to start with.
Feminism - that informs the behavior of most Western women these days - is narcissism turn up to full blast
And you'll have men lining up
The biggest point you made that I didn't thibk about, "Husbands don't brag about not doing something for their wives". Spot on.
Actually not true... i know a lot of men who brag that they neuer once changed a diaper oder vacuumed the house... and this includes my dad and my fil... and thats one of the many reasons they are both not in Our lifes
Yes, they do.
You're right, I've never heard a man bragging about things he doesn't do for his wife, but women do this all the time. If you love your spouse, show it. Plain and simple
@@michaelo8622 not true... i heard plenty of men bragging about never changing a diaper der vacuuming the floor... its pretty common
I have absolutely heard some guys saying they will do things so poorly that their partners never ask them to do anything ever again.. how is that not the same? 😂
Husband: "well im putting in 100% of the effort in this marriage, while she is contributing nothing. Might as well be single"
A healthy relationship is one where both contribute equally 💜.
"Equally" maybe yes, "identically" no.
Yeah? Financially too? Tell me how that one goes please.
It’s one where both contribute all they can. Equally relies on measuring and scoring what you do, and frankly if you’re ever able to tell that it’s equal you’ve been focused far too much on the measuring and not enough on the doing and appreciating.
Equality is for little kids
Nothing is equal in a relationship. What you do is exchange wants and needs from each other depending on how much you value them and how much you are willing to sacrifice.
Equality is an ideal sold to younger people who don't know any better and just say "yes feminism" and end up bullying the other for not being equal. Women have more value than men when they are young, but struggle to be useful when they get older. Where is the equality then?
Hubby and i have swapped roles. I am the breadwinner and hubby takes care of the house. This works for us. I enjoy dealing with the money making sure bills are paid and he enjoys house work. But i still help out. He cooks, i do the dishes. He does laundry, i sweep. He does outside labor, i pay the bills. Its about working as a team and catering to each others strengths but picking up for each others weaknesses. We are best friends and have a solid friendship underlying our marriage. That is the only reason we are still together and our relationship survived the death of our child. If you waste time fighting about this crap you'll never get anywhere. Help each other. If you see a dirty dish, wash it. See pet poop? Pick it up! Getting hungry? They likely are too. Cook for both of you. Half the time I go to do something hubby says with a big smile "beat you to it!" And then I do the same for him. The "competition' becomes a force for positive and loving relationships not fighting and petty arguments. Tada! Its always easier to blame someone else then to look in the mirror. To BOTH men and women. Time to grow up.
I Love this comment from you!! Husband/wife, roommates, and even coworkers. I can't stand the not my job mentality anywhere in life. Its part of just living in society. If you want to ONLY for yourself go live in a mountain cabin. Bless you
@@JohnFlynn-kf4zx Thank You :) i hope you have a lovely day 😊
This is real feminism in action, love it.
I love this. I thought that was the whole point. I can't find a woman like this because I am sick of workplace politics and drama but I have to work with women who honestly half-ass their jobs. One day at a time
This is a great comment, and my condolences regarding your child. Also it took me far too long to realize that "dirty fish" was a typo lol.
I've heard it said that ... "marriage is not 50/50, but 100/100" !
I love how the dog is always on the reasonable side 😅 good smart doggo
Because the dog knows who loves and knows who's self loving.
Women, if you want traditional things, be traditional. If you want to be a feminist then earn money like one. You can’t mix them up and have a good life.
I’m pretty sure they already are, women have been in the workforce for many decades. Most families can’t survive on a one person income anymore.
A real feminist= single.
@@rodgerhempfing2921 yes! Exactly 👍
Women are feminist whenever it's most convenient for them.
@@rodgerhempfing2921 I’m not single. It’s just that my man respects me, I respect him, and we split up the chores and finances equitably according to income levels, energy levels and just what needs to get done. I’m not his maid, he’s not my butler.
Well when you need a tire changed, something heavy moved, something fixed around the house hire someone. It isn’t your husband’s job.
@@nehirovuc7575 that is not what she was saying, and you know it. But keep playing the fool card.
@@LucasSilvero24 I was not answering to her I was commenting on another comment but I guess the name got lost.
@@nehirovuc7575 if they're both working? What about if they both pay for actual housing and other household stuff? Because if she spends all her money on herself then her working isn't relevant is it?
@@justbplz I agree??
@@justbplz its good to have self love you know that right like if my future woman spent her own money making herself fancy id have no problem with that but if she started to spend my money then i would have a problem but being selfish isnt always a bad thing even in relationships now if it is all the time then it can be but if the woman splurges on herself every now and then to make herself happy i see no problem with that
She's a grown ass woman. She can pay her own damn bills.
Most women work and are able to pay their bills yet still are expected to do free household labor.
For example, the Workers in USA are almost for 50% of them womens, so womens seems to work as often as mens.
But they still have to do household labor for free like inferior humans.
@@turtle12369 Most men work and are able to pay their bills yet still are expected to do free household labor.
Women should expect men to fix anything if that's the attitude they have.
@@flechette3782 fix what? How often? How about mind-numbing DAILY crap women do all over the world? Planning, shopping, loading and unloading stuff, meal prep, dishes, laundry, cleaning, appointments, paperwork, child care, elderly care? How much of that burden do you help your wife carry?
@@turtle12369 "meal prep, dishes, laundry, cleaning" etc. is EXACTLY what this skit is about, if you paid attention. The woman doesn't want to do these things, and is proud of not doing these things. That is what the skit is about.
*I* am saying that in addition to the skit's point women STILL want the man to do their traditional obligations...like fixing things around the house.
Basically, if this was consistent, the man should tell the woman, "fix the sink yourself".
Gender should have nothing to do with people caring about eachother.
Ahh but it does!
Exactly, but it's the feminists that ruin other women by preaching you shouldn't take care of your husband.
CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW CUTE THIS DOG IS ??
Not this clip, but a previous one, I had to watch it again because first time round it got about half way through and the dog entered. That distracted me from actually listening to the video!
That's about the only good thing in this entire video.
😂 I was more focused on the cute dog than the dialog
That dog is adorable🥰
I’ve got 2 goldens and they are absolutely goobers
And by not doing those things she is bringing absolutely nothing to the relationship.
I'd say "at least she's giving him sex," but let's be honest...if she's a married feminist woman, she's probably not even doing THAT!
Acts of service don't necessarily bring anything to a relationship
@@kimmcginn9948 Doing things for the other person does. Which is the point.
I met my wife overseas in the Philippines so I'm blessed to be with a traditional woman and brought her back to the USA. Had our daughter together.
@@kimmcginn9948 spinster moment
In our house, whoever works from home that day when the laundry basket is full does the laundry. So sometimes I do the laundry, and sometimes my fiancee
You can barely grasp how commas work so excuse me for doubting your ability to do laundry.
@DarthestWiffiest truly, it is reflective of my entire life experience, and you may judge my entire character from one UA-cam comment. I am in awe of your skill and applaud your wisdom.
Sometimes women have a problem with men and how they handle the clothes. Some men can also be very particular with the softners and detergents used as well as how the laundry is folded.
I think it's up for every household to decide.
Exactly! We also share responsibilities, if she is exhausted from work, I take care of her and vice versa. It's a partnership, we both provide for eachother. I would love to rather do my 12h work shifts and not worry that much about home chores and she could stay at home if she wished, but she would rather split everything 50/50. Everyone is different and we have to accept eachother for who we are, in my case I split things like she wants, some of you may instead do it like the malr counterpart desires, all up to yourselves, as long as you confirm with your partner how you wish to proceed with your partnership. :)
@@DarthestWiffiest Ironic, you missed a comma there, mate. I'm not even a native speaker :D
Well said, in marriage you help one another because you love one another. Everyone has different things to go to keep the marriage going and to have a happy marriage.
I would have never agreed to become a housewife or to be a servant to my husband. We were partners. We both earned money and we both didn't like household chores, so we shared those.
When I was home early, I did the cooking , when I came home late, I had a meal waiting for me. When my husband had been the cook all week, I would do all the cleaning, no problem.
I was better at financial and biurocratic tasks, so I did most of those , my husband knew how to repair electrical devices.
There are many ways to share the work that comes with having a home. No side should be exploited, but each should put in effort to make things work and show the other some love and consideration.
if you love someone, you'll do anything for them - from cleaning their shit and vomit off the floor to changing their period pads when they are bedridden with a 104F fever. it's not about being a "domestic labor force"; it's about doing the hard stuff for someone you LOVE!
Feminism is sickness
Therefore it is antithetical to love
Worshipping the ideology at the expense of your partner. Succinct! Beautiful and elegantly said.
If I'm cooking, I make enough for both of us. If I'm doing laundry, I ask if she needs anything washed. She does the same. Not that complicated.
Literally.
Yesterday I told my gf we serve each other and she said she loved how humble and down to Earth I am.
If a woman brags about what she doesn’t do she’s not the one
If she's not a wife, don't wife her.
If your husband adopted the same attitude and stopped doing anything "for you," then you'd change your tune very quickly. Where's the symbiosis in relationships like this gone?
A certain political movement in the world has done this specifically to lower birth rates. Same reason they are pushing lgbt stuff. To destroy the family unit, the only thing more important than government. Destroy that, and you can form society to your whim.
And this is exactly why MGTOW is becoming more and more successfull... nobody with a clear mind can bear that ideology any longer, it has become way too extremist
Stay safe guys, watch out for those 304's!
I get it if you both work full time. But if only one of you is bringing home the bacon so the bills get paid, the other better be busy with something of equivalent difficulty. That might be child rearing-and I honor that. But it better not be nothing at all.
Totally agree
Splitting the work around the house even if they both work. The husband still has to clean the gutters, take out the trash, mow the grass, shovel the snow, keep up with the cars. Women always forget the things a man does around the house
But also women and men have different standards of when a job has to be done. Like how clean a house is, or how many times you should clean a house, or how much effort should be put into a meal(like wow Dino nuggies are apparently a thing? Is microwaving even cooking?), etc.
Women love delegating work to men to do shit around the house because they don't have to do shit, but once their dinner is criticized because it's microwaved shit, then it's a fucking problem?
I disagree they are an individual why should they do all that stuff. I mean if they made the mess they should clean it up but you do your own laundry and she can do hers if she wants to she can do yours but i would only expect my woman to do her own portion because i like being independent and doing my laundry my way.
@@kylebonini6117 As long as everyone is contributing, each couple can work out a division of duties that suits them. I have always done my own laundry because I don’t like people touching my clothes. Plenty of other families find it works best for one person to run laundry for the whole family. Each couple can make their own decision, but if you’re not working and sacrificing for your partner, I assure you things will eventually fall apart or become rancorous.
You described my wife with much accuracy.
🎯
Oh, I don’t know how I never noticed this. It’s true it seems like people are really proud that they aren’thelping their partners. It used to be just women, but I’m also kind of noticing A lot of men are proud they aren’t helping their wives with certain chores or rent.
In other words,he doesn't need her.
THIS!!! If he’s going to do it all himself, the only thing she’s useful for is sex and he can get that anywhere with someone who’s less of a pain in the a$$.
Imagine saying: I'm not going to take care of my wife in any capacity. She's a grown ass woman. Plus, I'm not going to bow to the matriarchy. 😅
Maybe a question like "What do you offer him then?" would fit in this exchange and further prove the point. Very good and fresh approach. 👍
The ONLY "role" a wife should play is a mistress' one...Being a spoilt, happy and thus *horny* "freak in the sheets"... 😊😊Any kind of domestic labour is supposed to be outsourced... This arrangement is the ONLY way to keep the fire of passion burning...Every guy rejecting this arrangement exposes themselves as a prospective abuser and exploiter... 😮
fifties are so fresh.
Let's get back separate Bathrooms for colored people, Agent Orange and Electroconvulsive therapy for anyone a bit uncommon.
Yeah exactly, it's not like women have to adhere to traditional gender roles when they're in a relationship. If you don't provide anything and likewise he doesn't provide anything for you, are you even in a relationship?
Only if she has a job and her husband doesn't (which is rare), then she has the right to not to do those things. But if they both work, she should contribute in both expenses and house work. And if she doesn't work and her husband does, she should do all the housework.
I got lucky.
I work 40 - 84 hrs a week to provide at home.
Those 84 hrs of labor are killer.
My wife is a lifesaver, sometimes literally. The sleep deprivation is dangerous while driving.
She's driven me home, cooked, cleaned, washed clothes, even helped my school on an occasion.
When you love each other, you give each other everything you have and keep going.
Thank you for helping lost souls find their commitment to love, and to finding something worth dying for.
I've never understood why feminists think the term 'pick me' is an insult lol.
Good women want to be 'picked' by good men. That's how the process of finding a solid relationship works.
The term is more for the women that are putting other women down just to be seen or appreciated more by men
Because that's not what "pick me" means.
It doesn’t mean you did get picked.
A pick me is someone who does everything with being cool to guys in mind. It’s the opposite of a girls girl. It’s the worst. No one wants to be a pick me who’s “one of the guys” and laughs at other women at the women’s expense. That’s what a pick me is. “Ew I could never wear makeup. That’s so pathetic. I actually like myself” in a room of guys going “right?” Is an example of a pick me. Pick me pick me I’m not like other girls! I don’t wear makeup. You get it? And before you hate on me back, yes I’m a feminist, I believe men and women should have equal rights and I’m pro choice because I don’t believe women should have dead children stuck inside them like has been happening nonstopv in America since roe got over turned. I’m happily married to the best man ever and I cook and clean for him happily. But no one likes a pick me NLOG.
"Pick me" means being so desperate you resort to abnormalities that only serve to reveal said desperation like an open book...
@@greenaum it literally is
If in courting a woman she complains about men and says all that she won't do for you, run fellas. I have tried to.understand, hung in there and hoped to heal it, but you can't. They have to learn the hard way. This is the "I am the table" personified.
Billie is great though ❤
Or dont try to heal something that isnt broken I don't think woman should be stay at home barefoot and pregnant all the time those were 1900 values lets leave them in the past
Yup, my wife in a nutshell. She wants all the incoming benefits but none of the outgoing responsibilities.
And yet, you married her.
@@thedevilsadvocate788 some people hide their true colors better than others
@@kenoconnell7730 You are still married to her????? IF so then you are happy being a sucker.
@@kenoconnell7730 Eeeeh... fair enough. That's also why love myself some prenups and preparental agreements.
Its never too late to duvorce
Or just cut the income
Holy Jesus. That is so true. Thank you for being sane.
This just makes me happy I'm single. Women today are given all the wrong messaging.
I don't let my wife do my laundry cause she would probably throw out all my favorite clothes. What's wrong with a Hard Rock Cafe shirt from 1998?
Truuuuuue I'm 25 and still have shirts from middle school 😂
Hmm I never expect my partner to make doctor appointments. She has her own fulltime job. A spouse is not a 2nd mom.
Sometimes this creator has good points but this one…nah women are fully justified to be outspoken about not following societal conventions around delegated household labour.
@@Lumpyrox1412 you still didnt adres her arguments about men and chivalry. Should they also not follow that "sociatal conventions"?
@@Lumpyrox1412Soyboy narrative, really. I also don't get why it's always the Naruto stans, lmao
@@maher7361no men dont have to be providers. they can be the ones staying at home being the parent and the house husband if they want too. Nothing wrong with that at all
@@Lumpyrox1412yeah this was not one of her best points
This needs context...is she not doing it bc she also works? 🤔 If both are making money then both should do housework but if one person is staying home then they should do the housework. If there are kids in the picture then both should take care of things whether theres a stay at home parent or not otherwise the stay at home parent technically never gets a break. Once you have kids, both parents should be working morning to night whether its making money or doing housework. Kids are a 24/7 job. (Of course take breaks and get a babysitter or other help as needed if you have that privilege)
Presumably, you're also earning income. If you are a housewife, you're your husband's employee, keeping his house and raising his heirs. You want respect, get a job and earn it.
She's gotta point..... But in the other hand. PUPPY😍😍🤣
The comments! Such bitter selfish people. And clueless. Wow. No wonder so many are divorced and single (but still looking for ‘the one’).
Mate spot on. I was just thinking the same 😁😁
Exactly no one knows how to be a decent human being or a decent couple anymore
Everyone says love is lost well yeah if you expect you partner to do 100% of the house work just because you got to work and earn money then of course there will be no love but thats not what i want i want a relationship filled with love and happiness
When i was working, the household duties were shared/ equally distributed (we were both full time)
Now I’m home and I will completely undertake the duties myself because he is working his a$$ off and providing my ability to stay home and not worry financially.
It is still an EQUAL distribution of tasking just different duties now.
And that's exactly how it should be. God bless!
Since you worked, and are not entitled, you have a realistic idea of what having a boss and meeting quarterly goals is actually like. So you can also be a great partner when you don't work for money and hold down the domestic side. And you can also respect your partner's contributions without throwing pity parties for yourself and demanding that he do even more. Those are the ingredients that are often missing.
@@DrJamesBWood He has also lived alone before and knows what goes into keeping a house so he is very appreciative and respectful of my work as well. We have a wonderful balance and relationship.
I could not ask for more. ❤️
@@heyitsqueso3008 Good to hear more examples of this!
@@heyitsqueso3008Yes, THIS!!! It's why I've ALWAYS worked outside the home. I've seen how unappreciative SOME men are when they have a "traditional wife" at home doing everything to maintain a house & raise the children and they come home and treat their wives like shit for not having a job. They don't acknowledge the hard work that goes into maintaining it all.
How about sharing responsibilities in a relationship? Isn’t that the whole point of being together, to share the burdens ánd share the happy times ?
Try sharing every bill equally and see where that gets you.
@@noorsmith6186but men nowdays wanna be princesses so bad and almost every woman work. Men like you aren't needed anymorr. As if why would I have an useless husband if I already work and can pay for my house. I mean it is better to be alone and oay for yourseld than being your boyfriend's slave while doinf 50/50 how most of the women sadly do nowdays.even before. Be a man and provide with your responsebility and some integrity.
@@Someone-qi1rr The point of my comment was to show the hypocrisy. I WANT to pay for everything, and I will. But I refuse to get into a relationship with someone who only wants “equality” when it benefits them.
The kind of woman who makes life pleasant and easy to be in a relationship with, won’t refer to it like “slavery”. It’s only “slavery” when it’s for your husband.
Working a full time job, is harder than maintaining a home. So much harder. It’s not even close.
Al your comment indicates is that women entering the workforce has decreased their level of respect, and therefore attraction for men as a whole. No surprise relationships have gone to complete shit nowadays.
As a woman, here’s all you need for a successful relationship. Sleep with him often, be pleasant, and don’t argue. You will literally never have a relationship issue in your life respecting your man. But something tells me your initial comment indicates you’re the opposite.
@@noorsmith6186 with that I can agree. I mean we all should be equal and have same rights (exclude criminals). It is slavery if your husband is doing 5% while you are 95%. Sadly saw it happen with my grandma. She shared the house with my grandad who did nothing for it. She build it up herself and spent money on it also she was caring for children. My grandad just drank, and smoked. I suspect he also cheated but idk. The point is now it is easier to avoid those men. I am programmed to love my grandad but the kinda of person he was is terrible. Now he event got her in debt. She is still working while he retired 10 years ago. She also cleans and cooks. He still finds a way to insult her when she tells him to clean himself. When you know men like these your whole life marriage isn't all about love anymore. It is a lifestyle that needs to be suitable to both of the parties. It is easier to fall in love if that person fits your lifestyle than to be already in love with person that just hates or cannot have similiar lifestyle. Everybody is doing full time jobs nowdays. Honestly being a housewife is a job that has no vacation days. It is 24/7. I will only be when I get pregnant cause the least man can do is provide for his wife when she is pregnant and when a child is very young. But some cannot even do that. I respect hard working men, and women. In general, all people whp suceed. But most of the people do minimum wage jobs, have average strength and we cannot rely on few individuals. It is way harded to be pregnant and women in general than to work for a few hours as a man. It is a simple fact. We are dealing with hormons every month until middle age (when we lose period forever). I would be proud, respectable and would support my husband. Cause I don't date worthless men anymore. You know the times have changed to worse when men cannot even pay for a first date they invited you to. Luckily never had it happen to me but I hear enough from girls online. It is sad. Bar for the men is so low nowdays that it is embarassing how some even can fall beneath it. I will blame the podcasts for that. You all love to say women are the ones who gossip while that is what you do.most of the day. Not to mention, shaming single mothers but those assholes of a "husbands" are fine for leaving their children and wives? That is why I love 4B. Us women won't complain about needing men, but you will be the ones crying about lonely men epidemic.
@@noorsmith6186 I mean, if you want someone who wouldn't argue with you, be pleasant and sleep with you often, just find a prostitute. Why marry someone when you could just pay someone to do whatever you want?
Chivalry is not what people think it is… it is a medieval knights code of honor to never kill fleeing enemies, women or children. Somehow it got turned into opening doors or whatever people think a man should do today.
Why would anyone consciously decide *NOT* to help the person *THEY LOVE*
Why should she do anything? He married her. His house now belongs to her. If he doesn't like it, she'll just divorce him and kick him out, and he'll pay her part of his income and like it.
The dog is like “who the heck is mom talking to?” 😂
He needs a good divorce lawyer
I always bitch about this, men still have to do all the man labor as we always have but women just opted out.
What man labor do you mean?
I have a diificult time thinking of anything a man would traditionally do around the house and as a sole provider for his family that a modern woman cannot do. Either herself or with hired help.
Besides, you know, being a decent partner and someone you physically and emotionally are connected to.
So just to be clear, not attacking you or anything, just genuinely wanted to know what exactly you refer to when you say "man labor". Curios to hear you out.
@@lavenderxana Yard work, house maintenance ( carpentry, plumbing, electrical, roofing , painting , ECT) , moving furniture for redecorating, small item repair, auto maintenance and repair, killing bugs and other vermin, physical security, emotional labor of support a wife. While still having to pay for almost every because most couples still have men earning more money.
Ps
Most things that are gross or dirty.
@@lavenderxana"that a modern woman can't do" Yeah, let me know how women go about having a sofa on the third floor. Also I assume you don't mean men when you say "hired help" because these feminist narratives are exactly what's destroying the traditional roles in society. They're giving you enough excuses to go on about why you can do anything a man can, when that's just not true. You're just privileged beyond an average man and you don't even realize it
@@anilin6353puhlease that is stuff that men should not be expected to do if they don't want to or if they can't i got no idea how plumbing works or carpentry etc i can help move furniture but thats about it on your list why should men be expected to do this?
I have absolutely no problem with women being equal at work, and at home ... I have a lot of problems with women expecting a man to work and support them while they do nothing. If you don't have an outside job, then the house and taking care of your husband is your job.
I disagree
I think if you make a mess you should be held responsible for that mess and clean it up yourself not wait for someone to clean it up for you aka do your own damn laundry clean your own damn dishes etc split the cleaning of the house fifty fifty one person cleans one half of the house the other cleans the other half etc.
@@kylebonini6117 Do both people have an outside job?? If so, why would you think a woman should spend her days lounging around or running with friends while HE works to support her?? I'm not saying he has permission to be a slob, but the major housekeeping and cooking should be the stay-at-home spouse's responsibility, that would usually be the wife.
@@lauriivey7801 no he is an independent person trying to work and live alongside another independent person if you want a housekeeper or whatever go back to your mom a wife should never have to be a second mom if she doesn't want to be. You want dinner on the table so bad cook it yourself life isn't just hard for you just because you work unless you communicate everyday talk about feelings and shit then you have no idea what's going on inside her head she may be really depressed and hurt or she may be really happy just because "oh I'm exhausted from work" doesn't automatically mean since she isn't working she can't be exhausted life is exhausting for everyone. Now if SHE WANTS to cook you dinner she can SHE SHOULD NOT HAVE TOO IF SHE DOESN'T WANT TOO
@@kylebonini6117 So she should sit on her ass and be catered to?? That is NOT independent. If she's not working, she has at least 8 hours to fill ... she might as well be productive.
My bf and I aren't even married yet and he mows my lawn and even came out at 3:30am to rescue me from a bat in my house. I cook him meals every chance I get, and I have offered to do his laundry (he has yet to take me up on it, but I'll wear him down eventually! 😂). Serving him is not something I do because he is incapable. It's something I do because I love him. It's something he does for me because he loves me.
That's what you do for the one you love. You help take care of each other and actively work toward improving each other's lives. Your goal should be for your partner's life to be better BECAUSE you are in it. If you each strive to serve one another then you'll both be getting your needs met. You'll both be a blessing, and you'll both be blessed by the servant heart of your partner.
My guy and I both cook, clean, do laundry, and help each other out with housework. We also both take care of our dogs. That's what real couples do! If women want the man to contribute and take care of them (& their family), then women need to actually contribute to the household as well. "Domestic labor force" my a**!!
That makes her a pet, not a wife.
Yikes
@@hitthurdeaux If a partner doesn't do anything other than being a burden, they are a pet, not a partner.
The dog is adorable.
Seriously, I didn't hear a THING she said.
@@ThisIsMego You did, stop lying.
My wife cooks and cleans for me because I provide for her and protect her and our children. She serves me and I serve her. That’s the beauty of a symbiotic relationship.
If you don't work. Housework is your job. If you do, you share in the household work. It's not hard to comprehend.
Can we replace the word feminist with misandry(female version of misogynist)
They have become synonymous, and have been for long.
@@fedtstensome bad apples don't ruin the whole bunch. Feminists are fine, it's just some that take it to an extreme
@@daefaron I'd argue that it's the other way around - a few good apples can't save a barrel full of rotting decay. Those calling themselves feminists today are overwhelmingly misandrists.
@@daefaron It's not "some bad apples," it's the overwhelming majority. Feminism is equality with men... but only with the good stuff. You never see feminists protesting for selective service for women, or equality in divorce & child custody court, etc. Only stuff like equal pay.
I'm pretty sure this can be even simpler: people cling to things that let them shirk responsibility and be lazy.
If there's an ideology that lets you profit off some hapless clown serving you, some people will take it.
Yes patriarchy was an ideology that survived a pretty long time based on this laziness and desire to have someone else do the boring stuff for you.
Poor bastard. This husband has my deepest sympathy.
Many women are like this unfortunately. And as a man, I've retorted more than once to this attitude the following:
Why exactly would I have you in my life when you provide no positive benefits for me?
Sex isn't the end all and be all, and that's a mutual exchange when it happens.
when we started doing calculations of who's giving more or less, and when marriage turned into a contract instead of unconditional loyalty the whole man woman relationship turned south.
It's not about pride and equivalent exchange, it's about giving when we can and bearing when the other can't, both partners alike.
My husband macking money and I growing veggies,chicken for meat ,pigs,chick for eggs,ducks,cooking,cleaning washing,take care of kids,house,shoping groceries,paing the bills,organize the birthdays,backing and I'm happy!
Sounds like you have a fulfilling life.
Oh yes, and painting to..And I playing with grandchilde.English is not my L .
Men do a lot of stuff for their women, just in a different way. For example when she asks you to feed the dogs, pick up bread, take out the trash, mowed the lawns or go with her shopping just to name a few. The truth is we rather be drinking beer and chilling in front of the TV, playing games or even being with friends.😮
Women and men can contribute in their own unique ways. It shouldn't be exactly equals in every way. In fact, not saying that women are just sexual object but that is one thing men need from their women that he cant get anywhere else. So, using sex as a weapon is a very cheap shot.
The point is she should not have to ask you she should not ask you to do those things as a big boy you should just do them and you know what we would rather be with our friends and play games too so don’t think those are big tasked, they are not.
It’s also your trash it’s also bread you’re going to eat. I’m assuming it’s also your dog or the family dog don’t act like it’s all hers it’s not.
Your videos are gold. Underrated.
This isn't describing a wife, you're describing a mother.
I gotta be honest, I completely zoned out on what the video was about because I just want to pet that puppy!!!
I fall in between these two idealisms. If she works, they should split the household chores. If she stays home, it makes sense for her to handle the household duties to lessen his load.
Is it still a 50/50 split if she does 20 behind a JC Penny’s cash register, and he does 54 at the construction site or on the landscaping crew?
Because I see *a lot* of “Working is working” arguments online, and without extensive communication and a fundamentally non-legalistic approach to this issue, things get bad, quick.
@@shawnpanzegraf5642if she’s working a part time job and he has a full time job then yeah she’s at home more, so she’d have more time to get more done anyways
Same thing applies if she works full time and he doesn’t. Whoever is at home more naturally does more around the house because they have more time to do it
@@benc.3128 In general, perfectly fair. The only potential contention remaining is both partners working an equal amount of time, but one has a considerably more physically draining job than the other.
Do not forget to appreciate him and give him the occasional videogame or tickets to the big game and some beer money. Also new clothes and hairdresser and maybemanicure, those hands needs maintenance to maintain the house. Soft guy era, drizzle drizzle kings.
The purpose of a relationship is sharing.
You don't have to stand behind him, serving him.
You don't have to stand in front of him, protecting him.
But if both of you stand side by side, taking on the world together, it makes the load lighter for both.
I’m a bloke, I cook (wife cooks too but generally I do the meat and fish), clean (wife hoovers and I polish), do our laundry, clean the cars (wife does the inside), do the gardening (wife mows the lawn), change the sheets (wife makes the bed daily). Wife does diary and I comply. She does what she’s good at and I do too, I do what she doesn’t want to do and she does what I don’t want to do. Wouldn’t have it any other way
The soothing feel of proxy dog petting
God, I love that dog. 🐕🐕
A relationship is a 2 way street. It doesn't matter who does what tasks or what the roles are. What matters is that people agree on a fair division of labor so you support each other and are able to raise a good family.
I want to pet the puppy. He looks so cute!!
He gets all the scratchies.
I do things for my wife. She does things for me. That's how marriage works.
I understand wanting to be equal, I really do. I believe that men and women are equal. But I also believe that feminists right now want to be better than men to "even the score." Thing is, "An eye for an eye just makes the world blind."
Bet she’d take his money though
The next question should have been: "so what exactly is a wife's job?"
We all know sex isn't a wife's job. Maybe her job is provoking fights
To take a man's smile away, make it so work or being out of the house is their only sense of happiness or being wanted.
@@b1232ryou being serious? Like no if your in a relationship you both should make EACH OTHER smile and be happy.
I had this realization a couple of days ago. Tell me if this makes any sense, everyone.
Wow, I think I just had an insight. We all are one family in spirit, and it is the same with a soul "mate." we are still judged individually as we struggle as a family to strengthen the spirit. That is why we find a soul "mate" who we have matching personalities with, and we struggle to expand our love to have each other's backs in times of need and not to judge each other and to bring into creation what "our" "dreams" are in the "living"
That way, the soul mate of each other can always struggle with who their true self is and who they wish to be in our new life that is yet to come in omega.
The issue is that loving reciprocity is being equated with enabling someone. That pov also assumes that a man does not know how to do his own laundry etc. That's something you find out and communicate about while picking someone. You have every right to reject that in that phase. If you choose to marry without proper vetting you are partially responsible for the results.
So your basically a room mate that may or may not pay rent. Wonderful. I can get one that does.
You do not want to do the laundry?
Ok, you make $120.000 annually and I will do the effing laundry.
I believe some feminists really dont know what feminism is. It's just equal legal rights and to have the same opportunities. All the other things are actually personal choices. To have a job after getting married or not. To have kids or not. The way you divide chores and errands with your partner. All personal choices.
I understand women really suffered because they were treated badly by men that they use this behavior as an armor, to protect themselves. And some men who have low self steem get offended when women say " you dont have to open the door for me, I can do it myself" and instead of replying " don't worry, I do this for my mom, a friend, poeple that I care. But if you don't like it, that's ok :)" and move on, they literally disrespect every single woman saying " equal rights, right?"
But acts of kindness go both ways. I can open a door for a man, a woman, an elderly, a child. People need to remember that kindness has been and will always be part of humand kind. ❤
"I believe some feminists really dont know what feminism is."
This is true.
"It's just equal legal rights and to have the same opportunities."
Nope. That is not what feminism is. There was a large feminist movement in the 60s that had that goal, but they had huge, rapid success and the movement mostly fell apart as women actually started going to work and lost interest. The movement was already radicalizing, with feminists saying crazy things like all women had to become lesbians to liberate women.
The radical feminists got jobs in academia and created "women's studies." There they began to develop insane theories about how to dismantle the patriarchy. They began spreading until every school at a women's studies program. Then in 1995, Judith Butler published "Gender Trouble" and started a war in feminism, between feminist who believed that women are adult human females, and feminists who believed that the concept of women (and even female) were social constructs invented by men to oppress women. The still relatively sane radical feminists lost, they became "TERFs" -- tran-excusionary radical feminists -- and were kicked out mainstream feminsim..
Now feminism is a movement whose goal is to destroy the entire concept of women. It's also become impossible to be a feminist without embracing the whole progressive program of destroying whiteness, maleness, heterosexuality, and Christianity.
If your definition of feminism is accepted, then it's already been achieved... which takes it away as a tool for activists to manipulate people. That's why you can't get a feminist to tell you what feminism is in any concrete way, that 1) Hasn't already been achieved or 2) isn't just a form of misandry. People don't go around calling themselves "abolitionists" because.. well... that's everyone.
That's what it was back in the 80s but it's since changed.
I dated a feminist, we share the house responsabilities. She never one time say that being a feminist ment NOT do house duties. Thats NOT what feminism means.
You are his personal assistant as he is yours. Thats the whole point of marriage. Two become one
Can I pet that dog!?
It's not serving if couples share in the chores. It's just called being an adult
So you’re not going to do your job as a wife, I’m assuming you’re also not going to expect him to do his job as a husband, right?
Just because your a girl or a wife does not mean you have to cook or clean or do any of that shit if you want a cooked meal do it your damn self stop being selfish and expecting things to be handed to you like your back with your mom
@@kylebonini6117 Sure, and in exchange you’re also never going to expect your boyfriend or husband to do anything extra for you.
It’s only fair after all.
@@CdrChaos I mean I will always go extra but no I will not expect my wife or husband to ever go the extra mile as I don't need them too I am fine with them just being around me. I don't get your point
It's not about serving anyone, but simply dividing tasks. And if one partner goes to work, that doesn't mean that he only has to go to work and also definitely has to do household chores, but if the other partner doesn't go to work, Regardless of gender, the partner takes care of the majority of the household.
Actually, these are facts. I stopped doing relationships years ago since I already have to fully take care of myself, which is easy; I just removed the need to take care of a parasitic co-dweller as well.
When she won’t clean, cook, do dishes, and grocery shop, she’s automatically not cleaning up behind herself and that’s intolerable if I’m providing all the income too.
Forget the modern buzzwords! Doing the little things for a man make it easy for him to do the big things for you. Yes, he can make his own sandwich, and you can rotate your own tires. Yes, he can wash his own clothes, and you can fall in the toilet when he leaves the seat up. Simple.
I’ve never understood this “fall in the toilet when he leaves the seat up”. You go in, see the seat is up, and put it down. He goes in, sees the seat is down, puts it up. Where is the problem?
@@robinharwood5044 LOL, yes, to men that is the definition of common sense. For a lot of women who can be considered entitled, it is expected for the man to be considerate of a woman's wishes. What they fail to realize is that it's a non issue for us, but a statement of affection to them.
I am so over these conversations from both the men and women's sides. Its not complicated, people. Just maturely discuss your views and values and if they don't align and/or you aren't willing to make reasonable concessions, move on. Stop hating on each other. Its so dehumanizing that compassion, kindness and understanding of different viewpoints without attacking each other is becoming archaic.
I’d like to thank this wonderful ladies parents. They clearly did something right with this one…