Steven Seagal Zombie Movie Against The Dark Is An Embarrassment - Worst Movie Ever

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  • Опубліковано 19 тра 2022
  • The Steven Seagal movie Against The Dark is the zombie movie nobody wanted where he takes on zombie vampires in the most embarrassing excuse for a film the world has ever seen. He has to be messing with us at this point.
    #stevenseagal #badmovies #recap #movierecap #seagal
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 3,1 тис.

  • @SpaceIce
    @SpaceIce  Рік тому +234

    Check out my Patreon for ad-free and censorship free videos: patreon.com/Space_Ice

    • @babyoda1973
      @babyoda1973 Рік тому +9

      You got to turn it down bro I almost got my coffee out of my nose

    • @ketzyelmisuperamigo
      @ketzyelmisuperamigo Рік тому

      11% rooter tomatoes 💩💩💩💩

    • @lordjohnson48
      @lordjohnson48 Рік тому +3

      GotDamnit you are hilarious

    • @nopeyadayadayada1248
      @nopeyadayadayada1248 Рік тому

      Has there ever been one of his movies you liked? Some of his early stuff was pretty good. Imho.

    • @xxiv168
      @xxiv168 Рік тому +2

      You’re the most hilarious channel I’ve ever come across. The fucking jokes about “making body doubles do XYZ” and segal “waddle-running” / shooting without looking, etc are fucking hilarious . I’ve cried laughing at your channel several times . My favorite channel in 12+ years of watching UA-cam ❤

  • @galil_6863
    @galil_6863 Рік тому +5531

    You gotta give Seagal some credit. He was able to make an entire movie without going to the strip club!

    • @onearthonelegion
      @onearthonelegion Рік тому +203

      I bet he went many times

    • @MAGNUSERNST
      @MAGNUSERNST Рік тому +687

      The strip club is implied by the amount of time he isn't on screen

    • @blu_monstrausity_1548
      @blu_monstrausity_1548 Рік тому +114

      😂 This comment is FAR too underrated 😂

    • @dustin9367
      @dustin9367 Рік тому +1

      TAKE DONALD TRUMP STIR IN KUNG FU YOU GOT SEGAL 😂 LISTEN NOW CLOSE WITH THAT IN MIND 😂

    • @madamefeast4824
      @madamefeast4824 Рік тому +26

      Oh, he went

  • @ccb6013
    @ccb6013 Рік тому +621

    The elevator clearly just needed a human sacrifice to work again.

  • @davidemmons899
    @davidemmons899 Рік тому +905

    From IMDB:
    “The vampires in the film greatly resemble zombies, because the original screenplay had them as zombies. Steven Seagal demanded the script be changed to vampires though because he hates zombies.”

    • @twisted_nether373
      @twisted_nether373 Рік тому +182

      "Eh, they won't know the difference. I don't."

    • @dongiano
      @dongiano Рік тому +37

      I feel like that is backwards. It's more like zombies that 'resemble' vampires, not the opposite

    • @nodiggity9472
      @nodiggity9472 11 місяців тому +90

      They're actually the test audience from Seagal's last movie.

    • @ared4108
      @ared4108 11 місяців тому +36

      @@nodiggity9472 Facts. I watched "A Good Man" and looked like that for a week. There are good films in this world though, so it didn't last.

    • @vrykyl6464
      @vrykyl6464 10 місяців тому +44

      @@ared4108 The cure is watching JCVD dancing in a bar in Thailand

  • @charlie_23Laaaa
    @charlie_23Laaaa Рік тому +345

    SEAgal the only actor in history to use a stunt double for a casual walking scene

    • @franceskeith4934
      @franceskeith4934 11 місяців тому +37

      he dosent get paid to walk

    • @38dragoon38
      @38dragoon38 9 місяців тому

      Hey! Walking is hard work when you're as fat as salad-dodger Seagal!

    • @skylined5534
      @skylined5534 6 місяців тому +16

      ​@@franceskeith4934
      Or waddle 😂

    • @peeko_luxx2873
      @peeko_luxx2873 2 місяці тому +4

      Dude, how does someone like Seagal with such ties to Hollywood as he used to have, make films just a sliver better in quality above a Niel Breen film?!

    • @Reborncanine
      @Reborncanine Місяць тому +5

      @@peeko_luxx2873cause they’re money laundering schemes, not actual movies

  • @peterconnor6360
    @peterconnor6360 Рік тому +2118

    I love how the premise is "zombies are scared of sunlight." So everyone decides to travel in the night time, you know when the zombies would want to move around.

    • @kevinforslund52
      @kevinforslund52 Рік тому +45

      why don't they use fireworks to while their at it like the hippies did in zombie land 2 haha

    • @BeetsBeetsBeetsBeets
      @BeetsBeetsBeetsBeets Рік тому +41

      Yeah well when every movie Keoni Waxman makes is a 24 hour movie challenge you can't be worried about little details like increasing your survival in a survival movie.

    • @tachankaistheonetruelord905
      @tachankaistheonetruelord905 Рік тому +23

      It’s pretty much like the game dying light

    • @yamomspotatosalad818
      @yamomspotatosalad818 Рік тому +20

      Eh, I would say that’s one of the only things that make sense. If they’re afraid of the sun then they’ll hide in the buildings during the day and go out during the night, leaving the building less populated. Like Dying Light, like the person above me typed.

    • @beckyquin8365
      @beckyquin8365 Рік тому +17

      And not once do they ever actually even at least show the zombies running away or hiding from sunlight. Lmao.

  • @irotinmyskin
    @irotinmyskin Рік тому +2626

    Dude, I am completely addicted to your channel. May you never run out of Segal movies to talk about. This is gold.

    • @SedricSleepzzz
      @SedricSleepzzz Рік тому +54

      FAAAAAAAAAAAACTS

    • @efaoncobbgmailcom
      @efaoncobbgmailcom Рік тому +17

      Amen! 👏🏾👍🏾🤟🏾🙏🏾

    • @justinhackstadt6677
      @justinhackstadt6677 Рік тому +73

      Knowing Seagal he's got plenty more to come. 😆 🤣

    • @xtenthfloorx
      @xtenthfloorx Рік тому +54

      I agree, as this is wildly refreshing, and just generally fun. The movie voice is killing me with the sarcasm 🔥🤸🏾‍♂️🔥

    • @Donnie8888
      @Donnie8888 Рік тому +6

      For real

  • @WishAAAProductions
    @WishAAAProductions Рік тому +203

    I like to imagine Steven Seagal made this channel to trick us into watching his movies 😂

    • @AntiDoctor-cx2jd
      @AntiDoctor-cx2jd 5 місяців тому +18

      crap it worked, I'm watching executive decision with my kids

    • @Macephtopheles
      @Macephtopheles 3 місяці тому +8

      Would unfortunately require him to have both a sense of humour as well as self-awareness. Otherwise it could work... 😋

    • @michaelreilly6874
      @michaelreilly6874 Місяць тому +7

      That would be plausible if his ego didn't cause him to have loud tantrums whenever he's faced with criticism.

    • @ippomakunouchi901
      @ippomakunouchi901 Місяць тому +6

      If your watching Seagal's movies after watching this channel then your hopeless

    • @nathanwilliams4005
      @nathanwilliams4005 19 днів тому +3

      "Space Ice is Seagal and Seagal is Space Ice!" -Ace Ventura

  • @bleachedbonez
    @bleachedbonez Рік тому +83

    I love how the zombie vampires randomly switch between feral monsters and normal dudes eating people like they'd eat a burrito

    • @favoritemustard3542
      @favoritemustard3542 3 місяці тому +3

      "C'mere, lemme tell you a secret" my little human 🌯 lol

  • @Pokey-xp9gn
    @Pokey-xp9gn Рік тому +409

    "He forgets what movie he's in and kicks the zombie in the nuts" gold

  • @cenakp563
    @cenakp563 Рік тому +644

    "he slaps the zombies with his flimsy sword, which doesn't even cut them but still causes them to fall down and die out of embarrassment for being involved in this travesty" LMFAO 😂😂😂

    • @LukeDeveraux
      @LukeDeveraux Рік тому +46

      Bro please understand the logic behind it before commenting in a stupid way.
      He was slapping the zombies because deep down Seagal knows not all Zombies are bad.
      He was trying to slap and make them understand that they do not have to behave that way.
      He wanted to slap some common sense to them.
      That is why we were given a lecture on what is an infection prior to the movie.
      These movies are planned for decades before production.
      Respect.

    • @multimidnight13
      @multimidnight13 Рік тому +5

      ​@Luke Deveraux I can't tell if your being serious or not

    • @xyoungdipsetx
      @xyoungdipsetx Рік тому +5

      Lol had me rolling

    • @jillvalentinefan77
      @jillvalentinefan77 Рік тому +2

      ​@@LukeDeveraux Never thought the Universal soldier would be chill with Seagal lol.

    • @AdhvaithSane
      @AdhvaithSane Рік тому

      @@LukeDeveraux Are you for real or just being sarcastic (I honestly can’t tell)?

  • @HartleySan
    @HartleySan 4 місяці тому +40

    "Turns out the joke's on you. Seagal's already got your money, so shut the f*** up and stop asking questions!" Hehe! Burst out laughing there.

    • @TonySkittleAlive184
      @TonySkittleAlive184 Місяць тому +1

      Lmao 🤣 same here... It's just the way he says it 😂😂😂

  • @shmurk9829
    @shmurk9829 8 місяців тому +9

    "Even if i beleive the zombies took up welding, where would they get the torches" Van Dam would know what to do 😂😂

  • @lostcub8572
    @lostcub8572 Рік тому +752

    I didn't know a zombie can die from being kicked in the balls. Hell, it's a Steven Segal movie😂

    • @coolerthanafrieza4726
      @coolerthanafrieza4726 Рік тому +19

      Yea that was just hilarious 😂 never have i ever seen someone kick a zombie in the balls and if i did it never works but for seagal it does? Lol

    • @HL3AlcAida
      @HL3AlcAida Рік тому

      You need to destroy their brain so yeah that could happen

    • @samuelhollman7426
      @samuelhollman7426 Рік тому +10

      he was kicked in the face, that's what killed him. but It's still stupid. Also, when she kicked him in the balls it was actually the leg. what a fail.

    • @lostcub8572
      @lostcub8572 Рік тому +5

      @@samuelhollman7426 Steven Segal Production for ya🤣

    • @sleepyrowdy1826
      @sleepyrowdy1826 Рік тому +3

      Tbh it's worse than death 😂

  • @SpaceIce
    @SpaceIce  2 роки тому +946

    Steven Seagal is the exact opposite of Nicolas Cage

    • @matthewdaisley9996
      @matthewdaisley9996 Рік тому +55

      I love your videos mate!!!

    • @wimvanderstraeten6521
      @wimvanderstraeten6521 Рік тому +27

      The make-up of the zombies is brilliant. Eat your heart out, Tom Savini.

    • @seanm2511
      @seanm2511 Рік тому +16

      Are you trying to tell me there is a good Steven Seagal movie?

    • @christophercollins3632
      @christophercollins3632 Рік тому

      I’m withholding judgement here…Seagal might bang a waitress while fully clothed, then martial arts some dudes to death, and never stop banging the waitress.

    • @christianellegaard7120
      @christianellegaard7120 Рік тому +60

      @@seanm2511 Under Siege is pretty good, despite Seagals presence. Tommy Lee Jones helps a lot.

  • @Conan_the_Based
    @Conan_the_Based Рік тому +49

    I feel like this was originally meant to be a homebrew zombie movie made by college kids just for fun, but then the Director made some calls and came back saying "Guess what guys?! This is going to be a Steven Seagal movie now!!"

    • @sethlangston181
      @sethlangston181 Місяць тому +5

      And then they screamed at the top of their lungs, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooo!!!"

  • @SiR_KN1GHT3D
    @SiR_KN1GHT3D Рік тому +27

    You can choke a zombie but yet they can also survive underwater 😂😂

  • @bryanrussell6679
    @bryanrussell6679 Рік тому +804

    You could actually hear the desperation in Seagal's voice when they're walking down the hall and the woman says, "it's just down here."
    And he asks, "how far?" I could tell at that very moment he didn't know if he could make it.

  • @rustynail6819
    @rustynail6819 Рік тому +338

    It's amazing what Seagal can do with a $460 budget.

    • @make817
      @make817 Рік тому +48

      i was so curious that i went imdb to check .....this piece of shit has 6.000.000$(estimated) budget 🤣

    • @EagleFang86
      @EagleFang86 Рік тому +76

      ​@make817 most of that budget went to Seagals food😅

    • @Inzenzeofficial
      @Inzenzeofficial Рік тому +37

      @@make817 and The Raid was made with 1,100,000$, makes this film look even worse

    • @catsforhire9116
      @catsforhire9116 Рік тому +13

      Jfc I gotta know who's bankrolling these dung piles

    • @realpolitik01
      @realpolitik01 Рік тому

      These are money laundering/ tax evasion schemes. They generate zero profit yet they keep making them one after another.

  • @oddcrafter1270
    @oddcrafter1270 Рік тому +289

    "We're not here to decide who's right or wrong. We're here to decide who lives and dies."
    That would be a cool line if it were spoken by _literally_ anyone other than Seagal.

    • @mattway18
      @mattway18 11 місяців тому +16

      Think if Arnold Schwarzenegger said this?

    • @oddcrafter1270
      @oddcrafter1270 11 місяців тому +16

      @@mattway18 Hell yeah! He could pull it off.

    • @mattway18
      @mattway18 11 місяців тому +16

      @@oddcrafter1270 yeah, I’m thinking of PRIME Arnold saying it.

    • @KoeingseggCCM
      @KoeingseggCCM 10 місяців тому +17

      I think a couple of people could've pulled that quote off and not have it be corny as fuck: Karl Urban and Lance Henriksen spring to mind. Michael Biehn and Keanu Reeves could pull that quote off, too.

    • @mattway18
      @mattway18 10 місяців тому +2

      @@KoeingseggCCM oooohhhh good choices. They could pull it off.

  • @TheFirstAirbender1036
    @TheFirstAirbender1036 9 місяців тому +18

    "im going to turn the brightness up, fck u segal". 😂😂😂 man its midnight and i cant stop laughing 🤣🤣

  • @ReelRai
    @ReelRai Рік тому +736

    The fact that the zombie tried to lure the woman with "come closer, i'll tell you a secret", which is something you'd try to lure a 3 year old is so hilarious to me.

    • @alessandrozuffi5068
      @alessandrozuffi5068 Рік тому +82

      Trust me I won't bite you, why would I? Are you just assuming 'cause I'm a zombie? You're racist!
      She comes closer and gets bitten
      That would've been epic!

    • @onearthonelegion
      @onearthonelegion Рік тому +25

      Oh that's how you lure them. Reported you to the police

    • @Bobby.2000
      @Bobby.2000 Рік тому +5

      @@onearthonelegion I was just thinking the exact same thing. Crazy!!

    • @Bobby.2000
      @Bobby.2000 Рік тому +11

      @dejuren do we report the 147 people who liked the comment too?

    • @alexanderk7776
      @alexanderk7776 Рік тому +4

      What secret? I‘m into now🤓

  • @thomaslouis5626
    @thomaslouis5626 Рік тому +943

    To survive the Zombie Apocalypse you don't have to be faster then them, just faster than Steven Seagal, which is basically a walking pace.

    • @HappyHarryHardon
      @HappyHarryHardon Рік тому +61

      You meant a waddling pace.

    • @John-tj9to
      @John-tj9to Рік тому +5

      Hahaha good one

    • @adamlister3715
      @adamlister3715 Рік тому +3

      ​@@HappyHarryHardon 🤣🤣

    • @jsmesrahming479
      @jsmesrahming479 Рік тому +6

      Lol 😆🤣😂

    • @eldermillennial8330
      @eldermillennial8330 Рік тому

      @@HappyHarryHardon I’m almost a heavy, but I’m only 40 and not worn out yet. Even if this jackass was thin he’d still be too pathetically old for these roles.

  • @Novamoon97
    @Novamoon97 10 місяців тому +48

    "WHO WELDED EVERYTHING SHUT" had me dying 😂

  • @matevzvres2296
    @matevzvres2296 Рік тому +39

    I love how he says "Then the movie finally gives us what we all want" and UA-cam ads start playing 😂

  • @steves1112000
    @steves1112000 Рік тому +461

    I don't know what's worse: watching 90's ponytail Segal run like a girl, or today's Segal, who has morphed into Jabba the Hut, attempt to waddle breathlessly down the hall.

  • @jonmaster5000
    @jonmaster5000 Рік тому +404

    The biggest problem with this movie was the complete absence of a strip club scene

    • @tsipher
      @tsipher 9 місяців тому +14

      I really don't understand why they didn't include one, adding a strip club scene would make the movie so much better.. I think lol

    • @skylined5534
      @skylined5534 6 місяців тому

      And no underage bewbs to squeeze with his sensei sausage fingers?!

    • @Westtxcowboy100
      @Westtxcowboy100 5 місяців тому +8

      They did hire the strippers !🤷‍♀

    • @powerofme7144
      @powerofme7144 5 місяців тому

      @@Westtxcowboy100But he didn’t make sweet love to them. They seemed old for him too. What like 22? 😂

    • @BigSavageG
      @BigSavageG 4 місяці тому

      Zombie strippers scene

  • @ThefamousMrcroissant
    @ThefamousMrcroissant Рік тому +57

    The elevator scene actually cracked me up. They just undid the death of the volunteering guy in less than 5 seconds for absolutely no reason. "Oh I guess he's dead now, that tangent doesn't go anywhere let's just make the elevator work again". A+ writing

  • @gregorypalermo6797
    @gregorypalermo6797 2 місяці тому +7

    Lol, the very first line "Have you ever wanted to see Steven Segual vs zombie vampires? Of course not, nobody has!" in this movie review had me laughing my butt off.

  • @jamesnelson8469
    @jamesnelson8469 Рік тому +1322

    Steven is a comical genius that sadly won’t be understood for several generations.

    • @vladnemin6730
      @vladnemin6730 Рік тому +121

      He won't be understood by himself in a first place 😂

    • @lucacrespi88
      @lucacrespi88 Рік тому +64

      I was telling the same thing to a friend the other day. Steven Seagal is a master of surreal cinema. He will be remembered as a great surreal moviemaker one day.

    • @jamesnelson8469
      @jamesnelson8469 Рік тому +71

      @@lucacrespi88 I find his movies absolutely hysterical and he even does the same running jokes how he always ends up at a strip club and ends up having to protect some 21 year old girl who falls head over heels for his old manly kungfu charms and cringe voice

    • @lucacrespi88
      @lucacrespi88 Рік тому +45

      @@jamesnelson8469 don't forget the trademark shooting without looking.

    • @brianlash154
      @brianlash154 Рік тому +32

      And he's actually trying to be serious

  • @WorldwideGee
    @WorldwideGee Рік тому +487

    Bro... I used to be the biggest Segal fan as a kid, and this shit has me literally crying tears of laughter. Thank you

    • @HippedOak0608CZ
      @HippedOak0608CZ Рік тому +15

      I always kinda liked Seagal movies, but I dont think much when watching movies because no movie is without sins (nonsense)
      But this channel makes me laugh good

    • @iluvmylovebirdandmybudgiet7729
      @iluvmylovebirdandmybudgiet7729 Рік тому +37

      I loved his late 80`s early-mid 90`s movies....and then the floodgates of tasty snacks, cookies, and sprayed on hair... opened

    • @leoMC4384
      @leoMC4384 Рік тому +21

      @@iluvmylovebirdandmybudgiet7729 I agree. That old stuff was not that bad at their time. But these recent movies.. SMH

    • @A0A4ful
      @A0A4ful Рік тому +11

      I agree!- as kids we laughed with glee when he took down baddies- now that we're older, we laugh at his fast food takeaway movies, to keep stress away.

    • @pfpchad2747
      @pfpchad2747 Рік тому +2

      Same 😂

  • @lifeisfilth
    @lifeisfilth Рік тому +45

    while serving as stunt coordinator for Out for Justice, LeBell allegedly got into an on-set altercation with Seagal over his mistreatment of some of the film's stunt performers. After the actor claimed that, due to his aikido training, he was "immune" to being choked unconscious, LeBell offered Seagal the opportunity to prove it. LeBell is said to have placed his arms around Seagal's neck, and once Seagal said "go", proceeded to choke him unconscious, with Seagal losing control of his bowels

    • @plasentaman6061
      @plasentaman6061 Рік тому +5

      I hope that is a real story

    • @irvinmorales1409
      @irvinmorales1409 Рік тому +4

      ​@@plasentaman6061
      Unfortunately not but the real story goes is that Seagal hit Gene as hard as he could in the balls that it made Gene jump in the air. However, Gene still had his arms around Seagull and slammed him to the ground.

    • @powerofme7144
      @powerofme7144 5 місяців тому +3

      Just challenge him to a sprint and record it.

    • @HartleySan
      @HartleySan 4 місяці тому

      God, I wish that were true!

    • @malcolmcurve9511
      @malcolmcurve9511 14 днів тому

      ​@@plasentaman6061it's a true story

  • @zamardii12
    @zamardii12 Рік тому +14

    "So even though this is a Steven Seagal movie... he can't be bothered to be in most of it..." I'm dying.

    • @sethlangston181
      @sethlangston181 Місяць тому

      Even Seagal recognized how bad the movie was going to be 😂

  • @genozuzek7401
    @genozuzek7401 Рік тому +652

    Dude, this is seriously funny script writing. Not pompous. Not self indulgent. Just funny. Props.

    • @gdgf154
      @gdgf154 Рік тому +1

      Thanks bro

    • @bigbadboo659
      @bigbadboo659 Рік тому

      It's fucking great man

    • @dyr234
      @dyr234 Рік тому +5

      I laughed so hard when he put the mario music on seagal 🤣

  • @mututhlaw
    @mututhlaw Рік тому +356

    The lady choking out the zombie is prime time entertainment.

    • @RootofYishay
      @RootofYishay Рік тому +44

      Cutting off the oxygen supply of the undead by strangulation makes perfect sense 👌

    • @joelspringman523
      @joelspringman523 Рік тому

      @@RootofYishay
      Kicking them in cogliones is pretty effective, too. 👍

    • @frozenkingfrozenking6989
      @frozenkingfrozenking6989 Рік тому +40

      The zombie died due to confusion.

    • @Budu_27
      @Budu_27 Рік тому +5

      😂😂😂😂

    • @jerico.b
      @jerico.b 10 місяців тому +8

      It's funny when one of seagal's acquaintances was taken by a zombie and they're like "No. It's too late there's no way she could beat that one zombie." while you have that scene where a random civilian lady just beat the hell out of a zombie bare handed by choking it and hitting it in the nuts.

  • @JosePineda-jn8jk
    @JosePineda-jn8jk Рік тому +76

    Fun fact: Seagal is actually afraid of zombies, so they had to shoot in the dark so you don’t see the constant terror on his face. 🙂

    • @joniahdemarco3371
      @joniahdemarco3371 8 місяців тому +12

      That's because when he kills people with how crappy his movies are, he expects them to _stay_ dead. 😂

    • @joshuastandlee3455
      @joshuastandlee3455 4 місяці тому +4

      So Seagal can express emotions? I never knew that.

    • @JosePineda-jn8jk
      @JosePineda-jn8jk 4 місяці тому

      @@joshuastandlee3455 not to the camera, he never shows it to the camera. Or the audience would sense his weakness thus making his cuck-fears increase. So it’s a good thing we don’t see it, or he would feel compelled to bring more unaware women to the set…. to “protect” of course. 😏

  • @Ektalon
    @Ektalon Рік тому +11

    “No thought went into any of this.” That describes every damn movie Chubby Sifu has been in since Under Siege.

  • @jogo1666
    @jogo1666 Рік тому +62

    "Hes still seagal tho, and he forgot what movie this was and kicks them in the nuts"
    Died laughing

    • @Westtxcowboy100
      @Westtxcowboy100 5 місяців тому +1

      They're vampzombies, their weakness is their throat and nuts!

  • @mcw8900
    @mcw8900 Рік тому +193

    You've got to hand it to Seagal. He makes the worst movie ever, then makes another one even worse time and time again. A talent in of itself!

    • @kkit8629
      @kkit8629 Рік тому +8

      Steven seagal is the best out there, in every worst aspect.
      - Steven seagal.

    • @xxlCortez
      @xxlCortez 10 місяців тому +10

      That money won't launder itself.

    • @Theodore_Twombly
      @Theodore_Twombly 4 місяці тому +1

      ​@@xxlCortezTruly an egregiously underrated comment !

  • @natedetailscars
    @natedetailscars Рік тому +4

    It is 50 minutes into the movie... And we just now learned Segal's characters name.
    "My name is Towel."

  • @michaelhagerman9965
    @michaelhagerman9965 Рік тому +26

    Why did they change the set up so much? It makes sense that people go to a hospital to find medicine. They could've had one group stay by the window, with a plan for others go to find medicine for the little girl. As the members of the group disappear and get killed, other members go to look for them. Or the window could've been crowded by zombies, causing them to leave the window and travel deeper into the hospital. Also, the doctor guy should've been the main villain. He could have secret passages through the hospital, and captures the group to feed to his daughter. He could also have zombie cronies, because he feeds them live victims. It was like they had a bunch of set ups, but just wanted to get the script and movie done asap.

    • @joshuastandlee3455
      @joshuastandlee3455 4 місяці тому +3

      That's too much thinking for the writers of this movie.

  • @luke_3_113
    @luke_3_113 Рік тому +252

    Just when you think Seagal movies can't get any worse... a new low is hit.

  • @jeffrichards8897
    @jeffrichards8897 2 роки тому +240

    Always wondered how an action star would do in a horror movie.
    I'm still wondering

    • @rolfagten857
      @rolfagten857 Рік тому +5

      It's a Comedy movie hardstyle!

    • @dubuyajay9964
      @dubuyajay9964 Рік тому +11

      Arnie did a zombie film. But it was a drama oddly enough.

    • @NCA_Azzy
      @NCA_Azzy Рік тому +2

      Brad Pitt probably only one.

    • @ElPayasoMalo
      @ElPayasoMalo Рік тому +11

      Arnold Schwarzenegger did End of Days, Predator, and Terminator. Bruce Willis was in Planet Terror. Vin Diesel did Pitch Black. Chuck Norris did Silent Rage. Kurt Russell was in Deathproof. Danny Glover was in Saw and Predator 2.

    • @rolfagten857
      @rolfagten857 Рік тому

      @@ElPayasoMalo Yes and Wyat Russel and Gabriel Byrne are also in The Keep (1983) and Overlord (2018)

  • @gunnerzane5230
    @gunnerzane5230 Рік тому +24

    Being around a Zombie is still safer than being around Steven Seagal.

  • @JDA2185
    @JDA2185 10 місяців тому +11

    10:21 - "Please understand that in Seagal movies no matter how bad you think it is, it can always get worse". He definitely proved that to us with Attrition, didn't he? I couldn't possibly believe he could make something worse than Kill Switch, I mean that was such an atrocity I could not conceive that something worse than that could be made. However, Seagal rose up to the plate and came through... L:OL. This is why today I don't dare to say that he can't possibly make anything worse than Attrition LOL.

  • @pvenoob
    @pvenoob Рік тому +254

    The amount of trauma Space Ice has suffered having to actually watch all these piles of Seagal crap to give these amazing videos is unimaginable... Thank you Space Ice for the sacrifice you've made!

    • @powerofme7144
      @powerofme7144 5 місяців тому

      I think it kinda makes him kinda cranky 😂

    • @malcolmcurve9511
      @malcolmcurve9511 14 днів тому +1

      He was beginning to lose his mind on the water in the elevator shaft scene 😂😂

  • @CrimeDoesNotPay
    @CrimeDoesNotPay Рік тому +325

    16:27 Segal only had enough budget to put zombie makeup on the guy’s face and not neck. Truly a master at his craft.

    • @PNW_Chemist
      @PNW_Chemist Рік тому +38

      And his hands. But that’s probably just makeup residue from when the actor applied the makeup himself

    • @David-mu8pg
      @David-mu8pg Рік тому +8

      In the Seagull Deluxe Grand Pack Version, they completely scrapped the makeup and gave him a zombie mask

    • @TestyCool
      @TestyCool Рік тому +5

      7 million goes by fast.

    • @conditionallyunconditional5691
      @conditionallyunconditional5691 Рік тому +3

      Body double zombie.

    • @LukeDeveraux
      @LukeDeveraux Рік тому

      Dude,
      He was given some of Seagal's serum.
      So that guy was getting cured.
      The parts of skin you are seeing are the parts which got cured.

  • @MrDante224
    @MrDante224 Рік тому +28

    I love how you can actually see they only painted the water zombie's hands and face and how it' isn't even addressed because that's the kinda of quality we have come to expect from Seagal movies.

  • @SmarchitectMann
    @SmarchitectMann 7 місяців тому +13

    These videos are proof that comedy is more than timing. Not only do we have the spoofy movie voice, but the vocal frustration with how stupid the premise is is genuinely funny. The way you described pulling out a blanket and going to sleep in a zombie hallway is gold. I've cried laughing watching these.
    You're the best thing to happen to Stephen Seagal, meaning you're the only good thing to happen to Stephen sagaul.

  • @rokasrerroca7399
    @rokasrerroca7399 Рік тому +297

    The actress who gets snatched out the elevator door by the zombie @14:37 shows the most genuine look of surprise as he pulls her back. Seagal ran out of money ("ate through his budget") towards the end of filming and pitched a "surprise death" to the remaining cast members (as a cost cutting measure). 🤣 Her reaction was the only genuine display of "acting" in this mess and you can only see it for a moment, but awesome.

    • @joelellis7035
      @joelellis7035 Рік тому +35

      Basically, "OH shit! You didn't tell me this would be my last scene! My character totally had 20 more pages of standing around and doing nothing in the script!"
      She was pissed that she was not getting anymore days of pay.
      Segal probably paid a grip to make-up like a zombie hide just out of frame, then grab her at a pre-arranged signal.

    • @rokasrerroca7399
      @rokasrerroca7399 Рік тому +37

      @@joelellis7035 She was doubly shocked because she's a hottie AND had already been "Seagal'd"...she figured she was safe from any surprise "Red Shirt" moment. D'oh! Which teaches us all a valuable "Now You Know" lesson: Don't get "Seagal'd" until the movie wraps! 🤣

    • @mr2ti41
      @mr2ti41 Рік тому +17

      Wait.. they had a budget???

    • @atamanime5184
      @atamanime5184 Рік тому +14

      @@mr2ti41 yup this movie has budget 7 Million lol

    • @isaiahlanse7940
      @isaiahlanse7940 Рік тому +5

      Pure gold! 👌🏾

  • @danielhardcliff85
    @danielhardcliff85 2 роки тому +111

    Makes sense since seagals acting has always been on par with zombies

  • @Anakin-lf4bf
    @Anakin-lf4bf Рік тому +11

    This UA-cam channel is a hidden gem. I have no idea why this guy doesn't have a million sub yet.

  • @sporkenste1n236
    @sporkenste1n236 Рік тому +76

    Let's be real here, if they managed to take down Seagal this would be the first zombie movie where the zombies actually had leftovers.

  • @kurodahyokazahuchi5344
    @kurodahyokazahuchi5344 Рік тому +131

    "Against the Dark is the Movie nobody asked for and definitely didn't want" lol 🤣🤣🤣 so well written line

  • @Rondo2ooo
    @Rondo2ooo Рік тому +32

    I want to thank Steven Seagal for creating comedy material to amuse us.

    • @jonathansefcik473
      @jonathansefcik473 Місяць тому +1

      His movies are generally torture to sit through, with some funny bits sprinkled here and there. Space Ice's recap/roast videos are what make them funny.

  • @czmisfitsfan
    @czmisfitsfan Рік тому +11

    I remember buying this when it came out cause Seagal vs zombies sounded like dumb fun. I think I made it halfway through before turning it off and putting it back on the shelf where it's remained for fifteen years.

  • @thatcanada
    @thatcanada Рік тому +60

    Guy at my gym loves Steven Seagal, never stops talking about him and his movies. And yes, he has dropped weights on his head.

    • @starmanjr9179
      @starmanjr9179 Рік тому +11

      Before or after becoming a Seagal fan?

  • @baluoch
    @baluoch Рік тому +39

    I don’t even want to watch any more movies, I just want this man to narrate all movies…

  • @jhaysoncarter1900
    @jhaysoncarter1900 Рік тому +17

    You know a man is dedicated when he's able to sit through these movies and edit them into a UA-cam video
    Props man

  • @anotherworldanothertime7717
    @anotherworldanothertime7717 Рік тому +37

    13:34 Tbh that was pretty creepy, this actor carried the whole movie. "Come closer! I'll tell you a secret ... come closer"

    • @trenvert123
      @trenvert123 8 місяців тому +1

      You'll float too!

    • @sethlangston181
      @sethlangston181 Місяць тому

      "Donald Trump and Joe Biden are reptilians"

  • @EleyonTheGamer
    @EleyonTheGamer Рік тому +26

    "Seagal has a shotgun you goddamn idiot!" *shotgun blast*
    Gets me every dang time xD

  • @mkhachfe
    @mkhachfe Рік тому +213

    "...that the zombies are quoting Dante"
    There is always one line in all your reviews that make me laugh out more than the rest 😅

    • @mariuszpudzianowski8400
      @mariuszpudzianowski8400 Рік тому +13

      Look, if I was a zombie afraid of sunlight I would probably start reading books too. What else do they have to do during the day?

    • @thelonewolf70x7
      @thelonewolf70x7 Рік тому +5

      /\ You've got a point, Polish guy.

    • @matheusarruda6462
      @matheusarruda6462 Рік тому +12

      They also got the quote wrong (its written as "abandon hope all ye who enter here", its "abandon all hope ye who enter here") but I'd wager that was Seagal not being able to read.

    • @marckhachfe1238
      @marckhachfe1238 Рік тому +3

      @@matheusarruda6462 To be fair, i would imagine 95% of people get that quote wrong. Ive been guilty of that in the past.

    • @anonymousperson6119
      @anonymousperson6119 Рік тому

      @@matheusarruda6462 damn beat me to it

  • @madvtecyo546
    @madvtecyo546 Рік тому +4

    “Doesn’t matter how bad it gets, it can always get worse” 😂 hahahahha

  • @willygonutz9687
    @willygonutz9687 Рік тому +5

    The best thing Steven Seagal ever gave us is Space Ice.
    If there's one word to sum up Steven Seagal movies, it's the completely deflated, disappointed, hopeless, and sad way Space Ice just says:
    "...... anyways"😄
    I watch these reviews 2, 3, sometimes 4 times or more.
    I should be allowed to give them 2, 3, or 4 'likes'.
    Keep up the great work.

  • @prestonwarren2692
    @prestonwarren2692 Рік тому +151

    This is by far the best zombie themed film ever. The combination of Seagal and zombies will be a timeless treasure to be cherished by fans for an eternity. Seagal slapping the hell out of zombies with a sword and kicking them in the balls.

  • @sharonrigs7999
    @sharonrigs7999 Рік тому +36

    Steven obviously used the films budget for his trailer full of local 'masseuses' .

  • @appukuttanj
    @appukuttanj 8 місяців тому +3

    Frankly, there just aren't enough Steven Segal movies for Space Ice to make parodies of. Finite supply. That's my only regret 😅

  • @galil_6863
    @galil_6863 9 місяців тому +10

    14:05 Not gonna lie, that "grenade in a bottle" kill was pretty awesome. Probably the only good thing about this movie 😂

    • @eliasroflchopper3006
      @eliasroflchopper3006 6 місяців тому +2

      Yeah I thought so too! Haven't seen anything like that before, but I'm still sure he stole it from somewhere

  • @wowomg1980
    @wowomg1980 Рік тому +33

    This movie is like the used toilet paper from the set of Blade. Metaphorically speaking

  • @brokenalice218
    @brokenalice218 Рік тому +162

    I love you, man. I hope you will get big with this channel, i.e., won't give up. You make me laugh and the world needs it, y'know.

    • @henrybrennan
      @henrybrennan Рік тому +9

      This is true. At some point, these presentations are going to get recognized and the level of popularity will explode. What's really needed, however, is to set up a Patreon account with some decent (albeit, non-expensive) perks in order to market these solid offerings. That's where some of the energy should be placed. 😀

    • @dincaandrei
      @dincaandrei Рік тому +2

      Yeah,he is a master at this(Not talkig about Seagull) 🤣

    • @jummyran
      @jummyran Рік тому

      @@henrybrennan he’s already getting big I found him few days ago at 30k he’s close now to 40k

  • @Sir.Lil-NubStubs
    @Sir.Lil-NubStubs Рік тому +7

    11:08 Space Ice face reveal! 😂

  • @henrybrennan
    @henrybrennan Рік тому +216

    Really funny review. I used to love zombie movies. I'd even go see the George Romero films in the theater (by myself), when they came out. It took Steven Seagal and his master film-making to help me get over that.

    • @henrybrennan
      @henrybrennan Рік тому +34

      I also made sure to promote this channel/videos on my Facebook :)

    • @SpaceIce
      @SpaceIce  Рік тому +46

      Thanks, I really appreciate that!

    • @Maialeen
      @Maialeen Рік тому +8

      Against The Dark 2: The Againstening

    • @henrybrennan
      @henrybrennan Рік тому +1

      @nexus169 Also - "One Cut of the Dead".

    • @elephant_888
      @elephant_888 Рік тому

      @@henrybrennan 😂😂😂😂😂

  • @Mattastrophic1
    @Mattastrophic1 2 роки тому +89

    *Wow, why did that zombie talk like Jigsaw?*
    "dO yOu wAnt tO pLaY a gAmE, I mEaN bE iN a sEagAl mOvIe?"
    "No, absolutely not."
    "yOu hAvE pAsSeD tHe tEsT."

  • @TonySkittleAlive184
    @TonySkittleAlive184 Місяць тому +1

    "How the f••k it's full of water?" 😂😂😂

  • @slaebae3434
    @slaebae3434 Рік тому +3

    His movies are like a high budget youtube video made by a middle schooler.

  • @ten211966
    @ten211966 Рік тому +111

    I love it when a movie pisses you off! 😂😂😂

  • @ZiggyHernandez
    @ZiggyHernandez Рік тому +88

    3:02 I love the way Seagal has the sword casually held behind him with the blade swinging inches from their faces 😂

    • @malcolmcurve9511
      @malcolmcurve9511 14 днів тому +2

      Also, he's the only fella in a zombie movie to ever kick a zombie in the nuts😂😂😂 some next level sh*t

  • @TonySkittleAlive184
    @TonySkittleAlive184 Місяць тому +1

    "At this point he has to be f•••king with us!" 😂😂😂

  • @aRe_LoW
    @aRe_LoW 11 місяців тому +5

    "looks like pneumonia to me" HILARIOUS!!!

  • @brotherbruno1783
    @brotherbruno1783 Рік тому +8

    Right when you said “finally Segal gives us what we all want” a Burger King ad popped up and I lost it 😂😂

  • @billpatterson5461
    @billpatterson5461 2 роки тому +64

    man i hope we get a sequel to this some day

    • @parsoniareigns
      @parsoniareigns Рік тому +1

      Bill, if only. Alas life is too cruel to allow us to sample such art. 😀😂😂😂😂

    • @jmcc860
      @jmcc860 Рік тому +4

      I would pay big money for this sequel, an epic gem that’s under appreciated by art and film 👏👏🙌🙌

    • @dubuyajay9964
      @dubuyajay9964 Рік тому +2

      With Tommy Wiseau and Neil Breen added to it.

    • @kman215
      @kman215 Рік тому

      Directed by Neil breen

    • @heffey9622
      @heffey9622 Рік тому

      Everyone who comments should get together and make a sequel but I get to be the director, star, writer, hero, best ponytail haver, and anyone who questions me will be sent to re education but no we're in it together lol

  • @szrot
    @szrot 8 місяців тому +5

    I discovered this channel 3 days ago and it’s the only thing I’ve been watching for the last 3 days🤣

    • @ippomakunouchi901
      @ippomakunouchi901 Місяць тому +1

      me too i've already watched like 20 videos

    • @malcolmcurve9511
      @malcolmcurve9511 14 днів тому

      I have watched every single steven seagal review on this channel in the past week. Pure gold 😂

  • @milesanderson677
    @milesanderson677 Рік тому +9

    While watching these videos, you're just sat there waiting for the one line from the narrator that floors you, leaves you gasping for air and drenches your clothes from the tears of laughter.
    Today's line : "He's still Seagal though and forgets what movie this is and kicks a zombie in the nuts."
    Killing me.

  • @ten211966
    @ten211966 Рік тому +30

    At the 11:52/53 mark, look at the thickness of Segal's sword! 🤣🤣🤣

  • @travisdean8794
    @travisdean8794 Рік тому +79

    The narration of these videos are so damn hilarious! I can picture hearing this as a preview before I watch an actual good movie.

  • @Noteven0
    @Noteven0 9 місяців тому +2

    Zombie vampires? …that’s syphilis!

  • @robertmaguire1067
    @robertmaguire1067 9 місяців тому +2

    "It was pretty sweet how he opened that door though."

  • @nhonphan7704
    @nhonphan7704 Рік тому +43

    I remember this movie. This movie cemented my opinion that Seagal's career in mainstream was over. Before this, I saw "Glimmer Man" and I was confused as to wether or not Seagal was still a good action star, but this movie made it clear.

  • @junfaa
    @junfaa Рік тому +38

    Normally a voice like this would be grating but the commentary is done in such a way that it's actually funny.

    • @chalkdeamon6070
      @chalkdeamon6070 Рік тому +8

      At first I didn’t like it but it grew on me like Rich “The” Evens laugh.

  • @criticalthinker7822
    @criticalthinker7822 Рік тому +3

    11:20 I lost my sh*t. Lmfao 😂😂😂😂

  • @Aj-wt1sv
    @Aj-wt1sv Рік тому +22

    Parental advisory: we should not use our brain while watching Steven Seagal's movie.

  • @42k78
    @42k78 Рік тому +81

    I've seen a handfull of channels reviewing Stegal/bad films and I have to say, I don't think it ever gets old. I thought I was only gonna watch half a video and move on, but I laughed thoughout the whole thing so now I'm an avid fan. What has my life become?

    • @Bishop228
      @Bishop228 Рік тому +12

      The very same here. So many of those channels exist but I recently found this channel & really like this guy. Much funnier than the other Seagal channels.

    • @george4vIogging
      @george4vIogging Рік тому +8

      You are a man of culture Sir!

    • @Nikki_the_G
      @Nikki_the_G Рік тому +4

      I'll tell you what it's become, half of what it should be. Because you aren't watching his AWESOME Van Damme movie recaps as well! :p

    • @kevw333
      @kevw333 Рік тому +1

      Welcome, my friend.

    • @42k78
      @42k78 Рік тому

      @@cocksure8430 No shame in hiding it now. Yes, my life has become better now.

  • @TonySkittleAlive184
    @TonySkittleAlive184 Місяць тому

    "She just lays down to take a f••king nap.... WHAT THE F••K!!" 🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @ethanboyd7843
    @ethanboyd7843 Рік тому +71

    You know he tried to put him marrying the little girl in the script.

  • @Ender7j
    @Ender7j Рік тому +21

    It’s hilarious that the writers thought that your eyes could open even further while you are tripping…

  • @seanhorrigan677
    @seanhorrigan677 7 місяців тому +3

    Stephen seagal actually saved my life with his movies. He showed me that my life could always be worse 😅😂

  • @crapshot321
    @crapshot321 3 місяці тому +2

    OMG!! So Seagal just shows up enough so as to fulfill the contract requirements, and peaces out the bulk of the movie? I don't think even Neal Been was *that* lazy!

  • @Messej
    @Messej Рік тому +63

    I just recently discovered this channel, and I’ve gotta say the way you commentate on your videos is pretty funny. “She gets out of it by choking the zombie back. And then just beating his ass” was my favorite part 😄

    • @NineBreaker009
      @NineBreaker009 Рік тому +3

      I had to pause the video when he said that I was laughing so hard.

  • @JaneSmith-so6hw
    @JaneSmith-so6hw Рік тому +37

    Thoughts and Prayers to the tripping dead guy and the zombie with a secret. I'm happy one had fun and the other didn't ruin a friendship by spreading a secret. Great movie.

  • @4leaftayblack418
    @4leaftayblack418 Рік тому +6

    How did I just now find this guy??!! I laughed uncontrollably to whole time. This guy has to have a stranglehold on the whole Segal market!🙏🏾🤣🤣🤣🤣