CONSCIOUS UNCOUPLING: Breaking Up In LOVE
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- Опубліковано 30 вер 2024
- What does it look like to break up in love?
This video takes you behind the scenes of my breakup on the day that my girlfriend and I move out of our home after nine and a half years together.
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Credits:
Directed by: Adam Roa
Creative Direction: Ryan Fontana
Camera: Ryan Fontana, Connor Thorp
Edit: Connor Thorp, Ryan Fontana
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Adam Roa: / adam.roa
Ryan Fontana: / soul_panther
Hunter O'Brien: / huntobrien
Matthew Ayriss: / mayriss
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You are seen. You are heard. And you are loved.
Do you think we are crazy? Have you ever experienced anything like this in your own life? Or have your breakups been super messy and ugly? I would love to hear from you.
I've tried my best to stay friends with all of my exes, but at a certain point, it feels like the more loving choice to take space.
I have had a few ugly breakups but recently I would never leave a relationship confused, always made sure we spoke it all out, almost like we got to close the book properly! However I am yet to experience what you both did in this video! Which will be challenging but beautiful!
haha always room for coffee.
Thanks for sharing man, it's a definite journey
Why would I judge a conscious choice? I left a long term relation behind this year- my ultimate goal is to create a friendship with this human being, for I am grateful for the teachings, the time we shared and I appreciate him a lot. It was a conscious choice and very painful to take the step because we didn't agree about it... and still, it was not messy at all. - one question for you, Adam: are you 100% sure about the identity of the source that told you to break up with Azrya? Just wondering...
my boyfriend and me broke up two days ago. its heart wrenching watching the person you love crying because you both know its the best decision for the both of you. that you both have to separate to take care of ourselves. we've been together for 3 years this is so painful
hi, i just wanted to say that you’re not alone. my boyfriend and i broke up last night for the same reasons. our lives are so hectic now and after a lot of talking, we realized that the best decision for both of us was to go our separate ways. it hurts so much, especially because we’re still so in love, but we’re also young and need to figure out our own lives first. i feel your pain, but i know that you’ll grow from this and that everything will be okay soon. sending you so much love
I'm also going through the same thing, it hurts but it's the best decision for both of us and we both want each other to be happy.
Same here :( is it so painful
@Jess Ambler maybe you guys just need to talk or give each other space... as an update to my situation we talk about it after I told him i am breaking up and we give each other space and now we trying it out again and feel so much better
My gf broke up with me feel days ago and we both love each other but things have gotten so bad
Im starting therapy
My last partnership ended very similarly. The man I was with, our relationship was otherworldly. There was so much love from both sides, love that never expired... but the universe was calling us to move forward alone. One of the most stunningly beautiful, difficult, raw, & transcendent experiences I've ever gone through. People in our lives never understood our decisions, so I'm thankful you're sharing this!!
We've definitely had a lot of disbelief around us, but hopefully this video will help.
AdamRoa I know it's possible. Keep following your truths!
I believe some people are simply not able to be happy and deal with difficulties of family life.
This is my situation so much love yet it better we are alone
Hey how are u feeling now? Are u doing better ? I'm in currently same situation
How do you get through the painful bit of the breakup when you’re both in love with eachother? It just keeps feeling like the wrong decision even though I know it’s not deep down
It takes time and also it's important to have daily practices that help you learn to love yourself, instead of relying on another.
I’m going through the exact same thing. It so goddamn hard.
One of the most difficult thing ever I’m getting there myself it’s really tough
Feel that so much well said!
And how to watch them love again? How to not compare new love?
I’m going thru this right now. I needed this so much. I feel like my heart is being ripped out.
you'll be just fine.
AdamRoa I know but currently it feels like I’m making a mistake leaving someone I love so deeply to find myself. Feels selfish and wrong. I think I’ve done the work before I get into relationships and it always ends up me doing the same shit. Just not understanding how to change it.
I know we need to break up but he loves me so much, he says he won't be able to live with himself if he loses me on top of the work and health-related issues going on in his life. I tried to leave him last month on good terms but he said our breakup will be a bitter one. If a couple days of space has him so depressed, what will the real breakup look like?
im in the process of breaking up with my 2+ year relationship and thinking of it makes me feel sad already... I dont wanna leave him, but I feel he doesnt care or love me like before.. He spends less time with me and tells me im being dramatic for telling how i feel bout his actions towards me. It mkes me feel alone even were in a relationship. But i feel its the right thing to do.
Omg this hurts so much
It's hard having to break up with someone you still love and loves you back. The process would have been easier if the relationship was shitty and brought the both of you more sorrow than joy. But this break up of mine was nothing like that, we loved having each other around and cared for one another deeply. Still, things just didn't work out, things that were out of our hands.
The thought of wanting to get back to him keeps rushing in, wanting to get out of this painful experience. But I know that we both needed this to grow, and be better for ourselves.
I'm learning to be on my own again, after nearly 2 years of us always having each other to rely on.
❤️
Lovev's life true love Never die I know a great and powerful healer that can get back your ex or crua without delay Just forever within 48hours he helped me too immediately
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How is it today?
I broke up with my boyfriend four days ago. We were together for five years and we have been living together for four. We still love each other but we feel that we are no longer makeing each other happy. I'm broken, each day is harder than the last. I think about the future and how we were gonna spend it together and i feel empty and desperate. The worst part is that i know one day i will feel better, time will pass, other projects, other couples... and one day he will no longer be my most important person and i won't be his... that thought is killing me. It feels like i'm dying.
Sending love your way
I'm going through the same thing right now, sending love to you
You made me cry in a restaurant, thanks.
Im going through the same, obly I have battled qdepression almost my whole life and it doesn't help.
He was not good for me at the end but I can't imagine being able to have a life without him. He was the only reason I had to keep going... Now I feel empty and alone..
Please can u update how are u doing now? Are u feeling and healing better?I'm currently facing same plz tell
@@lyvsix i'm so sorry to hear, it's very very tough. the clash between reality and the expectations we had is very brutal. i think some flexibility is required in the mind to be able to think that life is not what we expected but maybe it can to be ok anyway. i hope that with time that will come. Please take care of yourself the best that you can, pamper yourself and remember to do the little things that you enjoy. Those are still there.
I had to break up with someone I loved... still love... they still love me.... because our life just went 2 different paths... very hard thing to do. However, how nice would it be if the world "loved" everyone they broke up with... and fights wouldn't exist.
That would be amazing. It can happen. It's happening.
Yes! It's refreshing to see this in you... that way I don't feel like I am the only one in this world that feels love at this level... if you know what I mean. You make me feel as though I am not alone... I have my partner.... but we feel so alone in this world and in how we think. And I feel you and your girl are kind of like us.
Any ideas on how to have a conscious uncoupling with kids? 😭
Sokos
Same here. We did it today. Mainly because we have different career paths and are in different states.
My girlfriend and I broke up a few days ago and I still very much love her t\o the point where my heart hurts just thinking about how we had to break up despite us both loving each other. This pain is so much greater because of the fact that for the sake of each other, separation was the only choice, which honestly still makes me so confused and sad. I'm convincing myself that it's for the best, but what I really want is to just have her back. Yet it seems like she is far more clearminded than me, which honestly makes me sad.
I fully relate to your experience as it has also happened to me a few days ago. It hurts so much and it’s sad and confusing, especially if it looks like they’re doing better for themselves. All we can do is be happy for them and move on from it. Time heals.
I’m currently going through this and they looks like they’re moving on so much faster, I know these comments were 6 months ago, but how are you guys now? Is it easier?
I'm so scared to tell my boyfriend how I feel because I love him so much and he has told me that he feels this way already. Like I am more clear minded and ahead of him in a way. I don't know how to approach this but I know we would both be better off separate while we heal ourselves.
I left my twin flame 2 days ago after she illegally evicted me from our apartment on New Year’s Day. I couldn’t forgive her for what she did to me. I’m completely ruined. My best friend & a truth seeker at that. I am head over heels in love with her, the pain coursing through my blood could trigger End Times instantly.
Since it was over a year ago, how does it feel now? I just got broken up and need some advice
I don't think you guys are crazy. I think you are both incredibly brave.
I really appreciate that, thank you.
My boyfriend of 5 years recently broke up with me because he feels he needs to be alone and figure himself out . Initially I refused to understand and assumed the worst but once I took the time to love him and understand why he needed to do this it was a lot easier to let go . We’re both in love but in our early 20s and I hope one day we find our way back to each other . But it’s a lot easier to love someone enough to understand .
I'm glad you have the love in your heart to understand. I pray that love leads you to even more love in your life
hey, going through the exact same process now! Stumbled upon your message and I fell a bit better knowing I’m not alone. Me and my boyfriend are perfectly ideal for each other, we fit like a glove. But he lost his true self throughout these 5,5 years and wanted to take time to figure himself out. Do we really believe to find each other again after some years? No. Do we want? Absolutely! Hurts like hell, leaving someone you love sometimes even more than yourself, who suits you the most. How do I go and open myself to new love again?
Jesus I thought I was the only one. My girlfriend of 4.5 years broke up with me yesterday because she felt like she couldn’t find herself in our relationship. She’s 22 and I’m 21. We went to high school together, we became adults together, we went to college together and we were about to move in together. Out of the blue I’m alone. I love her so much but for the first time in a while, we just felt differently. I’ve always thought love was more important than anything but I guess I was wrong, you really do have to love yourself first.
I am going through exactly the same
Having to go through this because of COVID is one of the hardest things i have done in my life.
Hoping you find some ease and grace my friend.
@@duckeh9755 It does get better! For me after around a month i was feeling 90% better. Me and my ex have a pretty healthy relation nowadays, we are good friends.
@@marcoscoutinho9355 that is where we are trying to head ! Glad to hear
I'm a late bloomer that finally found love at the age of 29 and although I was only seeing this woman for 3 months, our lives just took 2 different paths and we had to break up. We were deeply connected in such a short time. She was my first kiss, first cuddles, first love. I couldn't stop crying when it happened and she was hugging/kissing my shoulder as my tears were waterfalling into her clothes. I pray that I'm strong enough to find happiness like that again. This only happened yesterday. Crying while typing this. Still in pain. Thank you so much for sharing this video.
Much love my friend 🙏
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she is just so lovely
wow. My girlfriend and I broke up because she felt like she needed to figure her self out. shit hurts, but i know she was drowning. so i had to end the relationship to save her. We went on a break for a month until i realized it was causing anxiety for she and i, until i decided to officially end it. it was so weird cause all the people i've known have had breaks up that end miserably. It is still painful.
Much love
this shit hurts. how'd you get thru it?
I paused the video of number of times to feel the emotions...I can relate on many levels. I’m living a life of quiet desperation in a relationship that I know is not healthy. Beautiful children, beautiful family, beautiful friends...my identity is so intertwined with her the thought of ending things feels like someone close to me has passed away. I’m not sure that I’m strong enough to embark on this journey...So lost 😞
This is one of the most amazing and beautiful and life changing videos I have ever seen on UA-cam! Hands down! Thank you for sharing your vulnerability with us! THANK YOU!
Wow! Such an amazing compliment thank you. Can't wait to share more with you.
My partner Maria and myself today, finally, talked about ending this journey of ours. We love each other so much. But are so far from healthy for each other.
So, I needed something to remind me how we can navigate this. And that we aren't everyone else. And it doesn't have to be a big fight.
And we can break these ties that bind us with love.
And be friends.
Because that's what she is.
My closest friend.
Thank you for sharing Caleb, it's not an easy journey but its an honorable one... blessings on your transition and next month.
How are you feeling now?
I love my woman. She has helped me become a better man and the man i am today and how i view what a relationship should be. I miss her so much but our career paths has made us grow even more but in different directions. Different country different time zone different everything. We still love each other but its truly heart breaking to see our relationship not work because of something within our control but something that isnt. Ive come to accept that our time together was something beautiful and something i will always cherish with no regret or anything to tarnish what we have. It is really hard to truly let go of someone you love. But i think its for the best and if its meant to be and we are truly meant to be together then i do believe our paths will cross again and we will both be wiser, stronger, and more uplifting for one another. We mutually ended things on good terms bc we know its for the best interest of each other in our lives. But damn.. it still hits me in waves
Sending love your way brother, thank you
I am Sorry but if 2 people truly love each other- distance will not be an issue. So many couples handle this.
In your case career goals became more important than your love and connection.
You are too young to understand that at the end of the day, when you are on your death bed, you won’t be regretting “oh I should have worked more”. You would be regretting the people you have not given a chance, the love you abounded and the experiences you have missed.
I really needed this video. Thank you. My girlfriend of 4 yrs and I broke up a few hours ago. There was no hate, no bad blood, we were still both inlove with each other, but she was no longer happy of our current situation (long distance) and that she couldn't see herself enduring another year of this distance. So we both agreed to end the relationship. I will always put her happiness above all else, but it still feels like my heart is being ripped out when we can't even hug each other when we said goodbye. The only consolation was that we made a sort of pact that if ever we see each other again in the future and we were both still single, we would give it another try.
Sending lots of love your way
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That’s why my boyfriend and I broke up too. It is hard when you can’t hug each other and be there for them in the moment.
Me and my boyfriend have been together for almost 2 years and we had a really healthy and loving relationship. My father passed away from COVID-19 in November and he supported me, did everything I needed and helped my family out. He even taught me to drive and cook.My brother has had his drug problems for years and is just very abusive, steals from us, threatens us and now its only me and my mother. I love him but i started getting irritated at him for the smallest things and took out my frustration out on him, he said he didnt mind but I just couldnt be selfish like that. We always had more good than bad but my future was so corrupted and i felt like I needed to make my life right on my own without dragging him along. I didn’t see a future with us anymore. He truly was the best thats why he deserves getting his needs met and not feel unimportant. He wasn’t a priority to me and recently i saw my cat getting killed infront of me (i know to many that might seem like nothing) but she was a kitten given to me to grief. I just have no more love in me right now and Im in my last year of highschool, im still young.
Sending love your way Vanessa
I would like to say thank you. Thank you for sharing this because now I don't feel alone. Me and my boyfriend, or now ex broke up while we still loved each other on good terms so that we don't ruin our future. We love each other, we will always do. And he will always have a place in my heart. And just because iit's a breakup doesn't always mean it's the end. It's just a new beginning. So we're friends, and it's hard but we'll get over it. Because in the end, even if we don't find back to each other on the relationship note we'll always be friends and in the end that's all it matters. As long as I can have him in my life in anyway, I'm winning.
thanks for sharing :)
Absolutely, at the end, it's all that matters, all that ever matters :)♡
i feel the same way too, but we're still hoping for a "soon". Maybe later in life we'll still ask each other if we still love each other and if we can do a redo
@@instantregret6541 that is exactly how I feel. I’m currently saying goodbye to my boyfriend and we both just deeply feel that this is just a see ya later. We have to heal our wounds and focus on our purpose first and foremost before the relationship. Stay strong and know you’re not alone. We all know how deep the pain is❤️
@@STAYHYPE Same goes to you Chris, hoping for the best for you and your boyfriend too.
You are so brave for this. Currently going through the same thing. Breaking up amicably while still in love is hard.
You will appreciate the effort later, sending love your way
My ex and I broke up about a , month and a half almost 2 months ago. I'm 26 and she's 25. I moved from middle TN to Arkansas for this woman and we did everything together for 4.5 years. We broke up mutually still in love, but we knew that, for personal growth we must. We spent a week crying off and on into each other. I had to go through and am emotionally still going through these steps. It doesn't hurt less...just...different. There are nights where I will just release a torrent of tears because my mind is registering more and more what my reality is changing into. I know I'll be okay eventually, just realize your mind will try to logically try to process your emotion into something twisted, or start placing blame. Remember, no one is at fault, it was both mutual, your body is just not good at processing intense emotion. It will pass friends. Be around good people.
Hi plz can u tell when u started feeling better ?
@@Iminoamino I'm not 100% yet, but I'm definitely getting there. Occasionally I feel lonely, but then I remind myself of my friends and my family. They care for me and I care for me. Time will pass and I'll be where I'm meant to be.
How are you feeling now,please let ne know!
This is one of the most beautiful films I’ve ever seen. Funny enough, we were also almost 10 years in and just starting to plan our family before we realized we needed to restructure our relationship. I am on UA-cam today looking for stuff just like this because I’m grieving terribly, and you two have given me hope that we can still have a beautiful connection in the future, even if it isn’t what our younger selves pictured.
I was in a relationship with my first love for over 9 months, which may not seem long for others but as a 16 year, it was. I loved him so so so much and I still do. But he loves me so much more. I’ve recently came to terms with my sexuality and figured out that I am bi. He doesn’t know and I’m too scared to tell him so he just doesn’t understand why I’m leaving him and it hurts so bad to see the boy I love so much continuously putting his pride aside to beg me to stay cuz he loves me too much. Leaving him feels so wrong, but staying with him also feels wrong. I’m so confused and can’t shake this overwhelming feeling. Idk what to do :/
Find within yourself what you are most afraid of in this situation and then choose the loving choice. Be really honest with yourself.
Thank you for this. I’m going through this and I was searching for something to understand all of it and came across this. Thank you so much
really glad it found you :)
Same here... google and UA-cam kept failing me and then I found this. Exactly what I needed at that moment.
I asked my boyfriend of 5-6 months to break up 4 days ago, and he was completely against it but I insisted. We still love each other and it’s so painful. Because the same things kept repeating and I kept giving chances. And we’re just at so different points of life right now and maturity. Its so hard. I can’t think of a future without him even though I need to right now otherwise I can’t come to terms with myself because I deserve to heal and learn. I’m having such a hard time right now. We were both fighting so hard and I had to be the one to say that fighting for it wasn’t working. There were so many factors out of our control and we’re still hoping to be together again. Please I hope it gets better. He’s my first love and boyfriend that I was ever serious about. I’m still having trouble sleeping and eating because of how dependant I was in the relationship. I want so badly to hope but I know I need to work on myself not a relationship right now. It hurts so much, I love him and I’m selfish and want to be with him. But it can’t be as it was. I need to feel happy by myself, because I never did that before. It hurts so much more than any heartbreak I’ve had and I didn’t expect it at all.
update or tips? im going through the same thing right now.
Now that is a genuine reason for splitting up. I am in the same situation. Things keep repeating and I just can’t go forward like this anymore.
Give each other space and time. You will either come back stronger or you will heal and find the right person for you who is ready and on the same page ❤
I am currently going through a mutual breakup and it’s been one of the hardest things I have ever had to go though. It’s essentially parting ways with my best friend, but doing it out of love for her and myself. Thank you for sharing this. ❤️
Yes, it's incredibly hard so I am sending you lots of love!
My boyfriend and I are preparing for this.
He is compelled to marry very soon as he is in his late 30s and the only son to his very lovely, beautiful and old parents and his dad is sick now but I am still 21,in college and have a lot of opportunities in my way to pursue my dreams.
It is something none of us can help but walk different paths.
I am just glad we never had any bad/ugly moments ever in our relationship. We never ever let one another feel less/unworthy. It was always so beautiful. Always...
As much as I wish to be with him, I also have dreams of becoming someone I wanted to be before I settle to have family.
I just hope time will heal.
No matter where I am, who I become or who I am with
I will love him always, somehow!
Sending love your way ❤️
My partner broke up with me last night for the reason of us being too young and that we need to figure out ourselves first, what we want to do in life. She thinks we’re going in different directions. Her mind is saying it’s right but her heart is saying it’s wrong. I’m finding it very hard and I don’t know what to do. We’re both 21 but we’ve just got back from a long holiday in which she said we’re a lot stronger. So it kinda feels like it’s out of nowhere.
God this is my exact experience. I know I am being led to leave by Spirit, but I don’t understand why. My husband has been nothing but good, loving and supportive of me in my life. We’ve been together for 13 years, married almost 10. We have two little boys together, and I can’t explain it to myself - let alone any of them. Somedays I don’t know if I will survive this pain.
Hi Kathleen, may I ask how you're feeling now?
I've been with my boyfriend for over a year and we love each other so much but we're growing in different ways that aren't exactly what we want in a partner, but it's just so hard to let go. I'm really tossing back and forth on this and I'm stuck at the moment.
This is weird, honestly.
Seriously
Litteraly went through this yesterday...11 years.
I am going through this now. Seperated from my husband of 20 years. And although I know that this was a long time coming and it wasn’t a healthy relationship, I still struggle with letting go. I want things to be amicable between us, I want us to still be a family for my daughter, but I almost feel like I need to be angry or distant in order to be able to walk away. I think if things are good between us then I will feel like, if we are getting along, why the hell did we have to do this?? Why couldn’t we just make it work? Thanks for sharing your story, I think it will allow me to see my situation in a different light.
Sending you lots of love on this crazy journey.
Glad I came across this video. My bf and I broke up 3 days ago. We been together for 6 years. Gone through some bad times but also some amazing times. We love eachother so much but we know we been holding eachother back from just being the best version of ourselves :(.sometimes I’m not sure how we got here but I also know how we got here. If this makes sense.
My heart aches when I think about it and know that I won’t be coming home to him. I wish and hope that this is the best bad decision we have ever made. Destiny will tell our future but for now all we can do is mourn and hope for the best!
Adam I think that I can't express how much this video helped me today. I'm right now experiencing a break up after 14 years of relationship, and it has been awful, even more considering that I'm 31 years old. Almost every other video I watched started from the premise that you need to remove the other person from your life, and I really DONT want to do that. I still love her and I want the best for her life. So, watching your story has helped me to see that it is also correct to do an "alternative" way, keeping contact and taking care of each other. Based on love and respect. Thank you.
She and I have a lot of person issues going on, a lot of it is stuff to deal with in therapy, and a lot of it is for her. She is ridiculously stressed, hasn't had much time to herself at all and really just wants some independence for a while. When she told me I was pretty crushed, it hurt a lot but I know I need to time alone too. She and I have both agreed that we'd keep talking amicably but that the romantic aspect is on hold for now but, fuck me is this a challenge to deal with... On one hand I know that we need this (her a bit moreso than I) and if it festered in her, it may grow into resentment. I told her the most I could wait was a little over a year, and we agreed that if we never get back together as a couple, we'd still talk regularily.
I'm truly, truly hoping that the reunion happens. I am so happy around her, and I want it to last. Part of me feels a bit off because our connection is so strong but if we really commit to working on ourselves we may yet have a stronger relationship later on, and that resonates with me more than a potential end does. I really hope this works out, she is so incredible and finding a connection like this again will be close to impossible.
What a beautiful way to explore your "human" and to follow that inner calling as you surf through the fear and the attachment. Thank you, Adam, for sharing your heart, your instincts, your thoughts, your challenges, and your thrills with us; the world is ready and waiting for this new archetype of the masculine life-lover. I am so blessed to share this timeline with you, and I cheer you on as we all call in a little more crazy. So it is!
Thank you Ryan, Hunter and Matt for watching over him as you co-create this radically love(truth)-driven adventure together!
Love...
So much love for you and appreciate your presence :) Get ready for so much more!
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I am currently going through this as we speak. Packing up the apartment and I’ll be leaving tomorrow. Our hearts are in agony and everything in us wants to just give it one more chance, but we both have a deep inner knowing that this is the right thing to do. That we have to heal and focus on our mission before anything else. This is the most mature breakup I’ve ever experienced full of so much love and compassion for one another. If you reading this, you aren’t alone. I feel your deep pain. I know your connection was undeniable. You made the right decision….root in that always ❤️
hi, i hope you don’t mind me asking - how are you doing now? i’m currently going through the same thing, and it hurts so so badly…
@@mi14472 Hey! I am the happiest and strongest I've ever been! I finally fully detached and took my power back and realized how much I was not loving myself in that relationship. I have been intentionally single and found my purpose and passion in life and im building a whole business now! It's gets so much better when you just surrender to what you know you need to do even if it's scary! you got this :) Time to heal
This is beautiful.
I am standing right before a break up, I think, and I want to make it better than the disgusting ones before.
Thank you
we can learn and improve every single time.
@@AdamRoaOfficial it worked out beautifully! Thank you for the inspiration.
I put a lot of effort into never striking out when I felt hurt, to communicate openly, vulnerably and from a place of love. No matter what he said or did.
We have a wonderfully close friendship now.
@@jenniferhergert4447 Glad to hear, thanks for following up!
My partner & I decided to part in love. However she is distancing herself & detaching and it’s heartbreaking. I am lashing out just to get attention. It’s a lot harder than I thought
My boyfriend and I broke up 3 months ago. We had a wonderful relationship, we were crazy about each other and we fitted like puzzle pieces but our relationship didn't work. When we broke up, we decided that we're gonna take a path of the least suffering for both of us. It's very hard but together, we're going though this. We check on each other once in a while to make sure the other person is fine. We're still very vulnerable to one another and somehow this has helped us in our healing process. He's still someone special in my life. The fact that we're not together doesn't change that.
For anyone wondering if conscious uncoupling is possible, let me tell you, it is absolutely possible.
I’m 27 and My ex and I broke up 2 weeks ago and this is one of the hardest events I’ve had to go through because of the love we have for each other. We experienced more things in three years that most couples have a lifetime to experience as far as death and loss and we’re both just grieving. We both know this is best right now but it doesn’t feel like it, but we both know it’s the right thing and it’s probably the saddest thing I’ve experienced. She is my best friend and I just want her to be ok. I appreciate the video and knowing that everything will work out itself in this thing called life.
You guys are ridiculous. Go knock on her door and fix this. Good grief. So unnecessary
Shawn Clark It is necessary. They moved on.
@@EmilyGloeggler7984 why did they break at all ??
Currently living this. Girlfriend and I been together for 4 years, moved halfway across the country from my hometown 2 years ago for her career. I knew the first month I was not happy in this new place, but the last 2 years I did everything I could to keep it going so I can have a future with her. We love each other so very much, but no matter what we did, I am unhappy. My entire life is back home, and I have nothing here while she has her career she loves. My unhappiness is making her unhappy, and no matter how hard we’ve tried to make this a life we love, I’ve drained her far too long.
I will always love her so very much, and even a couple days since our breakup and me arranging movers to move me back home, we tell each other every morning how much we love each other. We’re still eating dinner together, even tonight, and I’ll still kiss her goodbye until the day comes soon where we’ll have our final kiss goodbye. I never knew what a mutual breakup could feel like, and as much as I thought it would feel better, it feels so much worse. The only comfort I’ll have is knowing she can focus on the life she wanted to build, and I hope one day I can truly feel good about that without wondering if we’re doing the right thing.
Steph, if you ever come across this video one day, I hope you know you’ll always be my small bear. I love you so damn much, and I hope you found happiness that I’ve always dreamed you’d have.
Appreciate I am very late to the party with this video. I hope you are both doing so well now.
I wanted to tell you that this video has really touched my heart. I am going through the exact same thing right now. My partner and I were together for 8yrs, we broke up only a couple of weeks ago but the love remains. The grief you feel of the loss of that person in your life is often u bearable but I know what we are doing is best for the both of us in moving forwards. Thank you for sharing your moment 🧡
This is definitely the kinder and more compassionate approach and shows a lot of emotional maturity. The reality is that most people are incapable of this and they project pain as unkindness.
wow, just went through this in my own life.... left with so much love.... its been unreal and beautiful.
Thank you for sharing this
Your welcome
My boyfriend of 4 years just broke up with me today and we still love each other deeply but we want different things and you were so right when you said it comes in waves. I wish I could be angrier because it might be easier. This sucks so much 😔
sending you so much love
My ex-partner and I had to end things because of our transition to ldr with a 12 hour time difference. I love him so much it hurts but we both know the time difference was hurting and we decided to end things together. This sucks, I've never felt so much pain.
This is how mine ended a month ago, how are you feeling now?
1:35 in already. My heart is filled with tremendous gratitude that you made this video.
I also recently broke up with my ex. We had some major incompatibilities. It almost felt like a fairy tale how we fell in love even though we were so different from eachother. I wanted to make it work regardless of how much that would take, because I was so sure of our bond and that it was worth it. However, one year into our relationship I found out that he had lied to me and it caused a lot of distrust. We tried to make it work but the doubts were so immense that they basically broke my spirit. The relationship turned toxic and despite his best efforts I did not believe in our relationship anymore and did not want to build a future together. It was, and stil is, heartbreaking. The love we feel for eachother is unconditional and limitless, but sadly a relationship is not on the table for us anymore. My heart stil aches everyday but I try to be positive and stay firm in my beliefs. Sometimes love is not enough and that sucks but I'm trying to be grateful for that part of my life and not torture myself wishing I could get back to that. For everyone who is going through the same thing, I hope you can heal and treasure your relationship as part of the past❤
Thank you for sharing this. Appreciate you!
It's like a funeral!
Kinda!
THIS SOUNDS BEAUTIFUL BUT IF YOU'RE TRULY IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE AND YOU REALLY WANT TO BREAK-UP THEN OBVIOUSLY SOMEONES NOT IN LOVE . JUST SAYING NO OFFENSE.
I don't agree :)
@@AdamRoaOfficial then why did you brake up?
I agree whit you. Never believe someone love you when you live a break up. We don't have different brake up whit someone, a brake up stay a brake no matter what you think and say " we brake up but she continue love me". If she love you, she accomplish everything whit you for ever and not just for a while because you are everything for her.
But you love each other... why are you leaving...
i cant understand this neither
Hhh... Just respecting or hypocrazy still memorieshit back... Say u have that aim, u are more conscious crazy woman, u leave me when I am broke instead of saying that, I don't wanna go court, OK I respect u, u take my furniture not a part of my salary, of ours u are crazy conscious, I get back whatver... Thinking stopped help me dears... Hh
maisetas because sometimes .... love is not enough... and thats the sad part. Did the same and its hard !
This video was a beautiful representation of what I am dealing with and had to stop the video and collect myself because of how close to home it feels. Me and my ex girlfriend started dating at 16 and now at 21 we had to part ways because I moved across the country for a job. Our relationship was far from perfect but did we ever love each other. She was my everything and I was hers. We were neighbours before me moving and we did everything together. She taught me how to love someone more than myself. I will never stop loving her I just pray that it works out for us in the end. I cannot imagine life without her. Thank you for this video
She said > “This is not what I wanted for us…I don’t know what happened…my feelings just started to change…but I really do want you to be happy”
Here I am 9 years later and my heart is still broken
Adam - thanks for sharing this. I'm going through a breakup similar, and just hearing someone going through the same feelings and being able to help me navigate my own, is huge. You don't know how much healing you're helping by sharing this journey. Thank you.
Just did this. The conversation was agreeable yet emotional on separate levels. Last March my dad got sick and while my boyfriend was supportive we changed, he changed, I changed due to 4.5 months of 24 hour caregiving while bf came and went. Then dad died and I was left with a void and he knew but didn’t grasp the fact he couldn’t fill that void. Nine months later we both understand we have individually moved on.
Sending lots of love your way.
It happened to me too. And I never see it in my life until watching this video. Thank you for sharing.
Allow life to unfold :)! thank you for watching
Thank you. This is helping me a lot right now to swim against societal convention. More people need to know that this is possible.
Thank you for this video. I randomly landed on this when searching for something else. The title is perfect for my current situation "Breaking up in-love" Today would be the day my fiancee and I reached our 11th year together. Yesterday we decided to call it off. You hit it on the mark when you said to your former lover, "You have been my everything and I want you to know that I have loved you as my everything". My heart really is feeling the pang of pain hearing that from empathy. Tonight he is moving out and I will use those words I learned from you to infuse this release for us with love and gratefulness.
My boyfriend and i are in the same situation. It’s heartbreaking. I can’t imagine life without him. We’ve been together 3 year and are deep in love but we have to breakup. I wish life wasn’t this hard. I’m writing this in tears. I don’t know if i’m strong enough to find happiness again and if i’ll ever be ready for that 💔
This was an amazing video. I’m sure many including myself can experience a breakup where the two still loves each other. As my eyes are filled with tears i can’t help but calm down knowing that other people have been through similar pain.
Currently waiting on my girlfriend to get the money to move out and while we’ve spoke and came to understanding that she has to deal with so much trauma from her past before she can communicate and be fully vulnerable. I know what’s coming and I’m not looking forward to it.
Its 2024 and i am here sobbing , overthinking about our 2 years relationship had to breakup .. which we both relies we have too even tho we love each other .. as her partner i’ve always support and care for her but our future and are responsibilities are getting a headache we cant see each other like before we have decided to grow a separated ways that was hard and painful .. as you guys suffer from this i trully deeply understand goodbye mellissa
Thank you for this and for this comment section! My 6 year relationship ended in love, but we both knew that we had to move on. Thank you sp much for this.
I'm just now seeing this....but I need to know...are y'all back together??? it was giving y'all could
i am going through a break up right now… i am also 6.5 months pregnant… and it is so hard. but I also feel it in my soul that we have to do it. and this video helped me to really accept it. let the love wash over me and realise it is unconditional. it doesn’t belong to anyone. it simply flows. no matter if we are romantically together or not.
thank you for sharing. just having tears flowing down my cheeks and also just letting life unfold as it is meant to… without control. simply keeping my heart open 🤍
Your honesty and sheer willingness to be so openly vulnerable gets a like and subscribe from me. May your process and healing be blessed, you're doing good work.
I appreciate that. Thank you.
So.. WHY did you guys decide this?
It was time to go our separate ways
Hi, I know this is your old video but I need to thank you.
I just amicably break up with my gf of 5 years. It still feels unreal to me, we did almost everything together, and we just talked about marriage earlier this year.
Thank you again, I will try to use this.
bro... can't, props for the balls but I can't.... I would just leave man be alone, not seeing her coz.... I just can't man f...... I'm too emotional for that
I Fking love this kind of crazy. I've had a understanding uncoupling but not with the emotional vulnerable expressions. 😭 amazing
I'm a bit confused by it. If both of you love each other, why leave?
We live in very confusing times . Also a time where People are full of shit and they masquerade their fear and weaknesses with "wholesomeness of Bullshit".
Because love is not always enough. As hard as it sounds and as stupid at it is, it's true. I'm going through a break up like this. We love each other, but we are simply no good for each other in a relationship. I can't even describe it. It sounds crazy but I believe that some people, despite love, make just better friends than partners for life. I never understood this. Was always wondering why. It never made sense to me but now, since I'm in the exact same place, I get it.
@@nataliamadejska2008 that's where I'm at right now as well, hence me finding videos like this. It's so hard to grasp because it's such a conflicting concept.
@@megware217 From my experience (day one and following: I was literally DYING. Like I could not breathe) - you'll get through this. I promise. Not, that I'm already fully healed. But it's been almost 3 weeks since our breakup, and I finally see a little light. Little hope. That this - as hard as it was, was indeed the best choice I could do for myself. I then knew, of course, it will be better so, but my feelings weren't convinced until now. It will get easier, believe me. I was looking for similar videos, was reading comments like mind now and thinking ''bullshit'', I will be miserable forever. On the contrary - I'm so, so, so much better today. The sun is going to shine again for you, even if you feel that you're in the deepest and darkest hole right now and you can't see the light. Everything will fall into place and soon you'll realize that it happened for a reason. Keep strong!
@@nataliamadejska2008 I'm in this exact same situation as well. As much as it hurts,we're ok and we've come to a mutual decision that the best thing is to break up. We both love each other but we're just not in love like in the past. I think that as long as two people are honest and communicative, it should work. Any tips from your experience? This is fresh,a few days since we decided to go forward with this.
I entered “tips for breaking up on mutual terms” not expecting anything close to come up. But this did. My bf and I have Been together almost 5 years. We love each other but we know deep down we both aren’t completely happy with each other. It’s the hardest thing in the world for me to accept. But I need to understand that he isn’t completely happy and I can’t keep trying to force something that isn’t there anymore. So we are deciding to end things on a good note.
My ex-girlfriend had a medical condition relapse a few days ago. We talked in the car for an hour, and she told me she needed to go away for months, maybe even years, to the ICU, where contact would be scarce. I began to spiral mentally for the next 36 hours, fearing the worst for her. This was my first relationship, and she's such a great girl. She broke up with me, not because her feelings changed, but because her circumstances did. She didn't want me to suffer. All she could think about at that moment was making sure I was happy and prepared to move on. But thinking that she could die, that I would have to spend the next couple of months or years living with that every single day, was agony, and it made it impossible to even think about moving on.
She called me this morning, and she's going to make a full recovery. She's made me the happiest man in the world twice, once when she agreed to be my girlfriend and again when she told me she was going to live. I couldn't help but ask about us, ask about where it leaves us, and she told me that her recovery doesn't change that this may happen again, and that both of us should move on still because this isn't the last time this could happen. I didn't try to plead with her, only to demonstrate my commitment to her as a person. I want to be her friend. And I'm okay with that.
my partner and I just ended our relationship, my first romantic experience ever, knowing from the start this was temporary as I had been dreaming of moving out of the country and traveling for years before we met, and that’s simply not his dream. I almost wish I could hate him but I can’t because neither of us have done anything wrong, and he is an incredible person. we both simply understand that we must grow separately now. and that breaks my heart all over again. It is our choice to separate because we want what’s best for the other, and that is extremely powerful
I have been with my boyfriend for 6 years now and we both love eachother ever much, but we know that for the better of our futures (a very person reason) we have to break up. He’s was my first love and I really don’t know how to go about this. I’m struggling.
I just went through a breakup and he cried trying to tell me how his family didn’t approve of us. Of course we were different worlds apart from each other mentally and physically. I have been together with him for 2 years and when he came back from his country he told me the wrecking conversation of how we have to break up because no one in his family was talking to him due to this relationship and I understood it. But he cried when I said that I have never seen him cry before but that means he still loves me as much as I do with him. He was not only my partner but my best friend. I want to be friends with him because I can lose another friend. And I hope things get better soon. For both of us
Today is the day where my girlfriend and I will talk about the future of our relationship, and I have come to the conclusion that is better to go our separate ways, even if it's the last thing I want to do, I know this is the right decision in the long run.
I had been looking at videos and turning myself inside out before coming to this conclusion. We have the healthiest relationship, no bad blood, no toxicity, only love for each other. But for me, the passion is just not there anymore.
All the videos I watched were about someone being toxic or a person that you didn't want in your life, but I feel like this one was made just for me, it's the only one I could see myself in, since I still love her and there really isn't anything wrong on paper. I was being so hard on myself since there were no MAJOR negatives when it came to my relationship.
Seeing you go through this, made me realized that breakups don't have to be ugly. They will always be painful, but doesn't mean that the love is gone and that you don't care about the person anymore.
Thank you so much for sharing. I am terrified of the conversation I will have this evening, and everything there is to come, but this gave me strenght.
No. I’ve been faithful.
What about the videos of cheating and the trip?
Oh you saw and pointed at my face. Yes but we now were broken up.
So what about the two or more I didn’t catch?
I didn’t love them.
It said on Facebook messenger you loved him and couldn’t believe he chose a fatty with rolls. How can find the hole?
Yes but I don’t remember now. Never cheated with Jake.
Today, in this messed up World… it’s so hard to find the right person. The “your person”.
I can never understand splitting up while you love each other so much without any serious issues like betrayal, abuse etc.
besides documenting it like that and playing in front of cameras isn’t really that genuine.
But I hope you are happy with your decision.
It’s hard when you want to consciously uncouple but your partner doesn’t have the same spiritual path as you. I was 21 and he was 25, his friends were moving on and settling down, and that was the chapter he wanted to begin as well. We had been in and out of each other’s lives for 2-3 years before committing to a relationship (at the ages I mentioned above). As time went on I got so restless. Every day was the same. Work, get home, make dinner, watch movies, go to bed. I wasn’t growing, I wasn’t learning, I wasn’t living.
I loved him; he was my partner, he was so full of love and joy, he was so giving, he was so resilient. But after a year and a half of partnership, I ended things and moved across the country. He was so hurt and angry at me. He cut off all contact and when I was visiting home & saw him out, he’d ignore me. This was almost 4 years ago. I never stopped loving him and I don’t think I ever will. He’s a soulmate, and I learned so much from being with him, I continue to learn so much by losing him. I miss him all the time, wish that he was in my life, but I can’t control this. I just found out he’s been living with a woman for a year and a half and they moved up the coast together. I had to go through the grief process all over again.
It’s sad but sometimes it doesn’t get easier, you just learn to live with it. I love deeply and I have a hard time letting go of people. Especially to someone else.
I realize, though, that this is much bigger than us. Spirit has a plan for him and I. Individually. We don’t know what that is. Though I grieve that the plan does not include us being together, even as friends, I have no idea what is destined. Why Spirit needed us to separate. I just have to have faith that it’ll all make sense one day.
She’s sick tragedionist, she love beauty of sorrow, detect in time and run from that kind of psychopaths.
I was with her for almost 2 years, I loved and still love her with all my heart. But we were moving in different places and she felt like she couldnt take care of us, let alone herself. Im trying my best ro let go and make the process and pain let me evolve into a better person. But I don't know how I will live without her. We'll always have a place in eachothers hearts but now I need to do it alone. I hope we, as individuals, can find ourselves.
Wow. You have me bawling... Nearly all of my relationships have ended this way, I am so blessed. Sometimes the unconditional love has folded on the other end out of pain, but I am also lucky to have friendship from souls I spent a portion of my life with. Oh my God I love those people so much and all they taught me and all we shared together
thats such a beautiful space to be in. Glad to hear you were able to do it so consciously.
I appreciate the authenticity and the honesty. On the other side , it seems completely weird to film yourself and your partner in the very moments you are splitting up. Is this just another way to increase the audience and make more money? These moments are supposed to be private. You can talk about it later.
In a relationship for 5 years with the most fantastic woman to who I recently got engaged. But sadly things change and we don't see the same future. We can see each other in our imaginary happily ever after, but we can't agree on what that is. So, we decided to separate while still loving each other so much. This video was helpful to see that others go through it and survive.
Damn. I am so grateful for this. I've been feeling a shift and hearing the call to uncouple from my almost 10 year marriage. We love and respect each other so much. We have a beautiful son who is our world. I pray I know when it is time to go and I am brave enough to end this version of our relationship.
I’m confused.. why would you break up? One you you didn’t want kids?
14 years and we are doing this. Its the single worst and hardest thing ive ever had to do. I am trying to navigate this process and we arent going no contact. we are trying to stay friends.
Two years ago I asked my ex husband to divorce me if he loved me. It opened up conversation and he/we realized that we love each other but we were not the right coupling forever. We have our moments of loneliness but we still talk openly and I overall support him in his life. 🙂
🙌
I find it odd to "uncouple" when you clearly have still feelings for one another, but I don't want to judge. In any case I find it very mature to end the relationship on good terms and not get into a nasty prolonged fight.
hello
I broke up with my partner yesterday
it's just that I didn't feel loved or important anymore (even though I know that he did care about me)
the last year I changed a lot and I he just couldn't support it all
and we really did care about each other
and I miss him so much
but I know that we both deserved better than what we were giving each other
and it hurts so freaking much
I want to follow this. My ex and I just broke up, we were engaged have a daughter together and two step kids on his side. We have come to the decision together, we do love each other very much and it is so hard but we have tried many times and unforuntely we do clash alot and it takes its affect on both of us. This is very hard right now, I leave with my daughter tomorrow to my sisters while I begin the journey of restarting my life from the ground up and he contiues on his journey of trying to reach goals towards his future.
my boyfriend broke up with me today, we broke up still loving each other and wanting to be together. it hurts in other way than every other breake up. he said that we will be together again if we will still love each other after some time but i dont even know what to do anymore. i love him with all my heart and i always will and he does love me too but we are still not an couple. He broke up cuz he didnt had time on this everything so i have to just understand it and wait as long as it will take to be back with him. i hate waiting but if its waiting on him? i know its worth waiting
This is beautiful. Thank you both for sharing.
you're welcome. Thanks for the comment.
this video was so powerful I had to watch it halfscreen because otherwise i would die ..........
lol! I'm glad you survived.