9 Things About Borderline Personality Disorder You Need to Know
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- Опубліковано 4 чер 2024
- Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a personality disorder marked by a pattern of ongoing instability in moods, behavior, self-image, and functioning. People with the condition typically experience an intense emotional instability that deeply impacts everyday life. To better understand this condition we’ll be discussing a few things about BPD. Please help share this video to help raise awareness.
#bpd #mentalhealth
Disclaimer: Do not use this video as a self-diagnosis. But If you see yourself with these symptoms, it's best to consult a professional.
If you would like to learn more about BPD and the signs of BPD, we have a video on that too: • 7 Hidden Signs of Bord...
Writer: Sidney Thompson
Script Editor: Rida Batool
Script Manager: Kelly Soong
VO: Amanda Silvera
Animator: Deanca Rensyta Mihardja
UA-cam Manager: Cindy Cheong
Editors of Mayo Clinic. “Borderline Personality Disorder.” Mayo Clinic, Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research, 17 July 2019, www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/borderline-personality-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20370237.
Editors of NAMI. “Borderline Personality Disorder.” NAMI, 2017, www.nami.org/About-Mental-Illness/Mental-Health-Conditions/Borderline-Personality-Disorder.
Editors of NIMH. “Borderline Personality Disorder.” National Institute of Mental Health, U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, Dec. 2017, www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/borderline-personality-disorder/index.shtml.
“What Is Borderline Personality Disorder?” Performance by Harmit Singh, Chihealth.com, CHI Health, 20 Jan. 2020, • What is Borderline Per... .
“What It’s Like to Live With Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD).” Performance by Sammy Marie-Grimm, UA-cam.com, MedCircle, 21 Feb. 2019, • Living With Borderline... .
Do you know someone who has BPD? Share this video to create awareness about BPD. Also, if you have any personal stories or video requests that you'd like to share with us, email us at editorial@psych2go.net
My gf has bpd and im trying to understand her the best i can
It’s hard but she probably loves you very much. It’s not her fault, it’s how her brain in wired.
Aww that’s really sweet and it makes me really happy to hear when someone is really trying to understand someone they know who has an illness/mental illness 🥺
I think that you’re a great boyfriend for doing that for her
Make sure you set boundaries though.
It’s so hard. That’s why I’m here too. It’s not their fault but we need support ... it’s draining.
Hello people from the future!
Hello.
Hello.
Hello.
Hi
Hello.
As someone with BPD (quiet subtype) I can tell you this has ruined every relationship I've ever had, mostly romantic, but some friendships too. Now I isolate because it feels safer. It is a very lonely existence.
Same here.
❤
And it is exhausting ..
Yo really late but I suffer from the same thing (quiet BPD subtype) and I've ruined so so many relationships and I still am and still will but isolating I promise only makes you feel worse, you need to get out there and make connections. Maybe we have more unstable relationships but that doesn't mean that every single one will be or that we don't deserve human connection because of it. My bf understands very little of BPD and he is the most stable and best relationship I have ever had. You have to take the risk of losing people and man it hurts like hell but I promise when you find that person, you wont regret everything it took to get there. I'm here if you need anything!!!!
Same here.
I have BPD. When I went for a "formal" diagnosis for it, I explained the symptoms I have, and detailed how I met all nine criteria for the disorder. After an exhaustive battery of tests, the psychologist "ruled out" BPD. He determined I knew too much about the disorder, and "exaggerated" my test results. The test wasn't just for BPD, but also ADHD, which he also ruled out for the same reason. We are expected to be completely ignorant of the disorders that plague us. I studied psychology in college, was married to a licenced counselor, and spent many years in therapy. For me to be ignorant of my particular disorders is not possible, and for me to be expected to act ignorant of them just to receive an "official" diagnosis (even though I was already diagnosed from my therapist and her supervising psychologist) is absurd. I hope none of you have had the experience of being nullified by psychiatric "professionals" as I have . If your overwhelming symptoms are "ruled out", do not despair. Not all professionals have the ability to lack bias in their practice.
Thank you, this really isn’t said enough!!
Diagnosing psychologists tend to have an ego that hinders people's access to mental healthcare and wellness which is absolute bullshit although doesnt mean people should self-diagnose. I had to get a 2nd psychologist that was referred through my therapist the 2nd time to get a real assessment for ADHD. I went through my PCP the first time who I had to push to get a referral from because she said I didnt have it because I didnt have bad grades at the moment and therefor I didnt need treatment. That's bullshit too. 2nd guy was awesome tho.
Well said ❤️❤️
This is exactly why I do not nor will never trust or support doctors. There are a few good ones but the entire medical industry is corrupt as hell and a lot of the things going on are incentivized by the insurance companies so you do not get proper care and people get to continue to sell you stuff you do not need.
I will fight anybody that says self-diagnosing is not okay.
It is perfectly fine Just do it correctly and make sure you are studying the DSM-5 and doing mass amounts of research not just watching one video and deciding oh I have a disorder which is Just as ridiculous as all these doctors pushing stupid things or misdiagnosing people multiple times.
I did an intake for a psychiatrist for my adhd and she said idk I think you have something else like bpd which yes finally someone acknowledged it. But I went to the psychiatrist and he doesn’t believe in labels -.-
BPD makes my life extremely hard, i lash out easily, isolate myself, and get paranoid at the smallest things
I dont have it, or rather I dont know enough yet to say that and cant get help from a professional, but I hope you some day get the help you need
I’ve learnt to control my emotions a bit better and I only lash out at my mom mostly 😌
U arent alone.
Me to
does bpd people having a hard time maintaining friendship or relationship Im just curious ?
My best friend has BPD. She's one of the warmest, kindest, most creative people I've ever known...and she can also be volatile and a little exhausting. She feels things in extremes. When she's happy she's endlessly creative and funny; when she's hurting she's a live wire. She's not the easiest person to be friends with, but I wouldn't trade her friendship for anything in the world.
That is so beautiful 🥺not everyone is willing to put through our mood swings but thank you for being there for her... I know it's not easy
You're an absolute peach! A lot of us understand that we're not the easiest people to put up with sometimes, so when we meet someone who is willing to put in the effort, even if we don't feel deserving of them, we appreciate them with all of our hearts for sticking by us through the highs and the lows. ♥️
😭😭😭😭😭 I love you for this comment
@Bradley Walton I hope you can get the help you need! A correct diagnosis can be a lifesaver in a lot of ways. Wishing you the very best of luck 😊
Thank you for not giving up on us (people with bpd)
As a man with BPD, getting more awareness out about this disorder feels so important. It's more than just "sociopathy in women". It's an actual distinct mental illness that requires a very delicate approach to deal with.
What is that approach?
@@zeah the stereotypes do a lot of harm.
Women get diagnosed quite easily with bpd and men are underdiagnosed. As well as men get diagnosed easily with adhd and women are underdiagnosed and/or misdiagnosed.
Those arrogantly formed stereotypes in society as in "women are crazy" & "men/boys can't focus and are all over the place" being normalized make life really hard for us.
my psychiatrist told me i may have a possibility of BPD, but I have ADHD which makes it really difficult.
like it's possible to have both, but that's so difficult to diagnose, and i'm scared i might have BPD.
@@Noel_Wood I have both, and I go through therapy a lot. BPD is usually trauma related, which is very common for people with adhd because of how invalidated their disorder is. Not everyone who has adhd had BPD and vice versa, but is definitely not uncommon either.
@@terhisomersalo8588 sadly it’s because there are also many women who are fakers and women are more likely to fake a disorder for attention than men. It’s also because generally men are less likely to seek help for problems to begin with and understandably because there is a higher chance they won’t be taken seriously. I would know from personal experience when I was literally told I’m not allowed or supposed to have suicidal feelings or depression.
My girlfriend has BPD, and we've been together for almost 3 years. Sadly, I never fully understood how to be a support, and that has caused our relationship to become unstable. But here I am, watching this video to be able to have a healthier relationship for both of us. I hope it's not too late, I love her
What do you do when she is very mad and yelling at you because of her mood swings? Do you have any suggestions?
@hippieflower Oh ok thank you, ill do that
More hugs more I love yous more often. 💗
these replies... they're so wholesome 😭 i literally have most, if not all the symptoms of BPD, the weirdest thing is that when I was way younger i used to have most, if not all signs of ASPD which doesn't make sense. im so confused.
I wish my boyfriend would have done the same for me. He always said he would inform himself and work WITH me but in the end he just accepted me aprubtly ending the relationship,.......
having bpd is literally a nightmare. to feel emotions so intensely and have suicidal thoughts from a small trigger is exhausting. Our anger is so intense we do impulsive shit we don’t mean to, then get extra guilty and depressed. I’ve had it since I was 15. To a borderline something small can be the end of the world. Don’t self diagnose by watching these symptoms, go to a doctor this is pretty serious shit that takes lives everyday. And for all of you that can’t afford a doctor, focus on your symptoms instead of labeling yourself. Do a lot of research. Self-diagnosis might do more harm than good since bpd symptoms overlap with other mental illnesses. Take care :)
People dont understand why we are angry """all the time""", or lat least for me people always said that im so weak because i feel so bad with something little... They never understand
Yikes y’all... I’m diagnosed with bpd but I do not get angry. That’s how your experience is, let’s not group everyone the same.
shit man, you like perfectly described it, i feel almost exactly the same. i was diagnosed with it when i was 13, but i showed signs before then and i remember feeling like a fucking demon. i’m glad there’s other people out there that know the struggle, i’m glad i’m not alone. take care of yourself.
@@Trollestiatumblur same here, there’s something called hidden bpd where your intense emotions get bottled up and it turns into self-hatred, psych2go made a video on it, it made me feel like less of a weird borderline, so if you feel like that, i recommend the video to you
Laughs in British
Something that wasn't mentioned is the chameleon effect. People with BPD can have tendencies to adopt other people's behaviors and lose track of who they are or how they thought about things before. They can then become paranoid thinking they are being controlled. It's a very strange interaction if you don't know that they have a disorder.
Omg 19 years of my life feeling like this
It’s in the DSM 5 criteria as unstable sense of self.
@@ileensaravia6427 is it a feeling that comes and goes or is it permanent?
@@userm180 permanent, i always have to second guess, rethink every situation out or have to reask myself if i really feel what im feeling.
@@ileensaravia6427 im sorry about that :/ is there any treatment u can get?
Two of my childhood best friends had BPD. Unfortunately, earlier this year, we lost her. If ur someone that has BPD, and ur thinking about doing something u shouldn't, please don't. I wish I could've told her that I loved her one last time. Told her how there's still more steps to take, more things to try out that could help some of it. So if ur here, reading this, and you have it. This is your sign. You're meant to live. You're meant to survive this, trust me, you've got it in you, you really, TRULY do. I love you, to the ends of this world and back. I think I may struggle w BPD or something w similar symptoms, besides my diagnosed ADHD. I say that to tell you: Idk wtf I do or don't have, but I do know life is dog shit a lot of the time. But some day, you'll get to choose how you want to live it, everything decided by you, meaning you might be able to find ways to cope, find small ways to make your days brighter, and make those bad days less frequent. I believe we can do it. You AND me. But you've got to trust me, I cannot stress this enough; the "easy way out" isn't a way out of it at all. That's way less than what you deserve out of life. WAY less. You may find urself to be unstable and unpredictable, but then again, so is the beautiful universe out there. It's dark and twisted and complicated. But from what I understand about it, and from what I've seen from pictures out there, it's also absolutely beautiful. So don't do anything harmful to yourself dear; we're not even close to being done w learning about the universe, we've barely seen anything, so why do you think this is all there is to and for you?:)
you’re such a beautiful person… more power to you and the kindness you have in you
i cried reading this thank you have a beautiful day ❤
Thank you ❤
i cried a lot while reading this, thank you for your kind words 🥺💖
i don’t know who you are, or where you came from, but to me tonight- you’re my angel. thank you so much for writing this message, words will never express how much gratitude i have towards you in my heart right now. just thank you so much. please keep spreading your beauty to this earth ❤
Psychedelics are just an exceptional mental health breakthrough. It's quite fascinating how effective they are against depression and anxiety. Saved my life.
Can you help with the reliable source I would really appreciate it. Many people talk about mushrooms and psychedelics but nobody talks about where to get them. Very hard to get a reliable source here in Australia. Really need!
Yes, dr.sporessss I have the same experience with anxiety, depression, PTSD and addiction and Mushrooms definitely made a huge huge difference to why am clean today.
I wish they were readily available in my place.
Microdosing was my next plan of care for my husband. He is 59 & has so many mental health issues plus probable CTE & a TBI that left him in a coma 8 days. It's too late now I had to get a TPO as he's 6'6 300+ pound homicidal maniac.
He's constantly talking about killing someone.
He's violent. Anyone reading this Familiar w/ BPD know if it is common for an obsession with violence.
Is he on instagram?
Yes he is. dr.sporessss
I feel that the worst thing is becoming "that anoying person who gets angry at everyone" and then get excluded
Same 🤦🏽
That's me
Happens to me all the time , it fucking sucks
... hurts to even read it, happens all the time
@@mayakhaled1712 we can heal
"cut contact with others to protect themselves" yes that's me
I feel like it’s best to just be alone lol
Yes me to
yep. i will hate a job so much that i quit without notice to get out and protect myself in the moment. two weeks later i’m full of guilt and regret because i’m broke. then i beat myself up about it.
Aside from many of the symptoms listed, my sister cut contact with her entire family about 12 years ago over nothing, literally. The strange thing is that we all live within a 10 mile radius of each other and often see her in different places with no interaction on her part. Both our parents have passed away in that time span and she didn't acknowledge either of them.. we have always been a close family, so this was /is extremely difficult for us to comprehend. We had no falling out or argument or hard feelings.. she simply cut us ALL out one day, just like that. It's been very painful to understand and we've made many attempts to reach out with no cooperation on her part. Very strange disorder.
I cut contact when I find flaw in ppl. Like they do mistake or hurt me (unintentionally). I just change myself so much so that ppl will stay with me and like me. I give too much then expect same from them. And what not. So yeah I do this. It comes to a point questioning myself that should I follow my gut instincts about them or should I be totally fine with their behaviour and following their rules.
I could remember several years ago, I suffered severe depression and mental disorder. Was actually diagnosed with BPD. Not until my husband recommended me to psilocybin mushrooms treatment. Psilocybin treatment saved my life honestly. 8 years totally clean. Never thought I would be saying this about mushrooms.
they saved you from death bud, lets be honest here. and mushrooms are one of the most amazing things on this planet i wish people would all realize. they could solve a lot of problems, more than just mental treatments, environmental clean up; the possibilities are endless with fungus.
Can you help me with the reliable source 🙏. I'm 56 and have suffered for years with addiction, anxiety and severe ptsd, I got my panic attacks under control myself years ago and they have come back with a vengeance, I'm constantly trying to take full breaths but can't get the full satisfying breath out, it's absolutely crippling me, i live in Greece. I don't know much about these mushrooms. Really need a reliable source!! Can't wait to get them.
YES very sure of Dr.alishrooms. I have the same experience with anxiety, depression, PTSD and addiction and Mushrooms definitely made a huge huge difference to why am clean today.
I hate that psilocybin gets grouped with drugs like cocaine and heroin. Mushrooms are a remedy, not a vice! I went on a microdose treatment for a couple of months and within the first week, every sight of a cigarette got me questioning why I was doing all that to myself. It really works.
How do I reach out to him? Is he on insta
For people that don’t know, psychiatrists diagnosed Anakin Skywalker from the Star Wars franchise with BPD. Watching this video made me realize how many of these traits perfectly describe Anakin and has made me view his character in the prequels in a whole different light, while also helping me understand BPD more. It’s a shame people didn’t really understand or like his character when the prequels first came out.
I came from that video
Awww I loved that starwars. That’s pretty cool
If you’ve been diagnosed with BPD you are not alone❤️
Yet alone im real life.....
@@vito3510 me too probably
Yes we are.. alone in torment
Shaking your virtual hand and giving a hug. We indeed are not alone 🌸💙
I may not be, but I wanna be.
people with BPD are often misunderstood and mislabeled as "crazy". thank you for sharing this, hopefully we can all understand each other a little better with these videos.
Yes, we hope these videos can help promote awareness.
agreed
We are a very misunderstood group.
Yea and it doesn't help that in movies the person with BPD is always the crazy ex-girlfriend or the crazy girl trying to get this one boy and willing to kill for it..
media portrays us very poorly, but i also feel like the people that end up having a platform that have bpd have self diagnosed themselves or end up further stigmatizing the disorder
A summary if you don't want to watch the whole video:
1. Fear of abandonment
2. Persistent and wide mood swings
3. Paranoid thinking
4. Emptiness
5. Impulsivity
6. Splitting (in emotions)
7. Trust Issues
8. Risk factors for development can be environmental and/or inherited
9. Changes in interest or value
The video misses selfharm
Diagnosed with BPD, used to have a Favourite Person for 9 years. This person abandoned me in January, I'm still grieving. It's been the most painful thing I ever experienced. We should talk more about what a FP is and how does it feel to have one - or lose one, which is even worse
Going through exactly the same phase . We will heal ❤️🩹
Omg guys, I can't believe how all of you are so positive! I have the exact same situation - abandoned me before New Years and it was almost 7 years. You wrote 3 months ago that you still grieving, now it's almost 6 months and I feel like it's getting worse than before, like if I don't get them back I'm gonna die... All of you wrote about the FP thing and "there is only one person for us" mentality and I just can't believe y'all feel the same way as me, it's so true but the worst part is I don't know what to do with it! I can't even go to work, he left me alone with everything, mother is a nightmare, I have nothing... Therapy is expensive and I don't wanna change my mind I only want him, everything you wrote is so true but I don't know what to do about it😭
@@aidandempsey6493There are many people in this world. Find others who are supportive of your emotional needs..
Did they abandon you or did your actions have consequences? Every person with BPD claims to have been "abandoned" when in reality their ill behavior causes people to not want to be around them. My sister, for instance, is a miserable human being and when I went no contact she claims I "abandoned her" to other without fully disclosing the absolutely bonkers behavior she displayed. Enough victim mentality.
@@emclaire18Ableism, Homophobia, Transphobia are all rooted in racism
"dont self diagnose" i'm trying not to. o swear
Same ;)
Same...bpd isn't fun.
I got diagnosed with schizophrenia but I'm pretty sure It's BPD
@@catzilla6279 how so? (Not being rude. Im just curious, I tend to overthink things...so I have to clarify that lol)
@@catzilla6279 I highly doubt that, BPD and schizophrenia are EXTREMELY different types of disorders
The way I picture BPD is that your mind is split. Your constantly trying to figure out what you feel about things, and when you think you have an idea you mind decides to flip on you and you feel the complete opposite. It feels like my mind is shattered into different pieces and there constantly changing.
It’s exhausting.
I overthink EVERYTHING because of it.
I drive people crazy because I lose my shit one minute and then I feel sooooo awful and apologize like crazy.
Excellently put! Totally identify with you
Totally true! It's like I cannot make a decision and the moment I do, my mind starts cross questioning. And there I go submerge my head into self doubt and paranoia.
@@ruchaj1748 it's a huge struggle in life we have to deal with and can take years to slowly figure out, if ever. I hope you and everyone else can figure your journeys and struggles out. As hard as it may be to believe, peace can be achieved and I hope you find it someday.
YES
As 38 year old with BPD I can safely say I am still completely lost in life! From the outside I have a very successful life with a good job, house, cars, etc however this condition has taunted me from ever since I can remember. I have lost friends, family and now my Wife because of my inability to be "normal". It is amazing how quick people are ready to abandon you when you need help the most. The NHS seem unwilling to help and the numerous drugs they prescribe appear to do nothing for me.
One thing I hear that’s been working is DBT or dialectical behavioral therapy. Worth looking into for acceptance mind fullness and tools for emotional regulation
@@sugarcope4253 Thanks.
Im 34 and still feel lost. I have no idea what Im doing or want. I understand you completely. I have someone who tries very hard to keep me happy and I love them but it’s always the abandonment issue that makes me push them away.
Try Deep PEAT, Basic Peat or Dp4. Techiques were invented by Živorad Mihajlović Slavinski.
I think i had BPD and accidentally healed myself from changing my patterns, reading scripture and not giving up. I’m like amazed at how i seen this years later.
It’s like being trapped in a mind and body that you don’t even understand yourself. It’s exhausting
I described it as being in a mental fight with myself and getting my ass kicked!
It is so so so sucky I'm with ya.
Yes yes. It is. Every day.....I know they say things will heel wen you loose ur child and mom .but omg it still hurts.
exactlyyy
exhausting!!!!!!!!
My partner has BPD and after a lot of therapy (before we met), she feels she has a pretty decent handle on coping with it. Sometimes she still needs to hear me reassure her of my feelings and intentions. And sometimes a mood swing will catch us off guard, but we carefully work through it together. If you have BPD, your life can get better and you can have healthy, fulfilling relationships. Please don't give up.
Thank you so much for your supportive and encouraging message
I know your intentions are good but the BPD in me can say stfu what do you know and don’t be so patronising to tell me not to give up… I’ve lived like this for 30 years. That’s the black and white thinking cas on another day I’d say your g/f is so lucky to have you and your clearly empathetic.
That is the joys of splitting…. I know your intentions are good, no offence, I’m just using your comment to show the craziness that is BPD.
(And your g/f is very lucky to have you!)
This is just the best comment and it gives me so much hope. Thank you.
your comment brought tears to my eyes, thank you for sharing this and thank you on behalf of your partner for being such a steady, understanding and caring presence for her.
My boyfriend and i have worked together through it and like you said still struggle sometimes. Its nice to hear a good similar situation. Sometimes i still panic when I realize ill have this mental illness forever
The worst part about bpd that has really affected me is the intense mood swings and suicidal ideation. I don’t think i can take it much longer but i will try to keep living for my friends and family. Im just starting high school so i hope its better than last year. I wish all of you luck whoever is reading this. We can get through this ❤
Hey, just so you know, I'm rooting for you 🤍 hang in there you can do this
Hey dude trust me, I’m sure this prolly sounds dumb and you’ve heard it a thousand times already, but it always gets better. Even if it seems like this is it, this is the end, it’s too much. It always gets a little better, just focus on the good stuff you do have and don’t ever listen to the suicidal voices, they can’t be trusted and they lie abt everything. One thing I think to help is “am I better than I was six months ago?”
@@Ctsone2It won’t get automatically better tho. There is a reason why People commit suicide etc. it will get worse if you do nothing about it. It’s like a disease you have to take measures to not let it escalate. Just sitting around and hoping it will get better won’t happen. Everyone has to find out how they can battle it for themselves.
It gets better. I felt so relieved after I graduated high school. Something about school settings just make everything worse. The social anxieties of it all can seem unbearable but please hang in there! It’s amazing that you’re so self aware at a young age. Also avoid narcissistic people they make BPD worse. Praying for you ❤
@@vintage_peace definitely 💯
The only thing about my experiences with getting professional help, was that they always wanted me to take medications that made me act and feel really weird. They want you to taper UP, to higher and higher doses, and tell you right away that it’s for the rest of your life. I’m sure many of you will disagree with me on this, but I stopped taking the meds because I couldn’t properly care for my children or focus at work. I was on medication adjustments for two entire years! I tried them all.. and finally said screw it, and decided not to take anything at all. I continued going to therapy and group meetings, and learned how to recognize and deal with my swings so that I could live my life,instead of being strung out on government checks afraid to leave my own house. (That’s how it was for me on those meds) I’m not giving advice. I’m not suggesting anything, either. I’m just sharing how I’ve been doing it for almost 35yrs. My roommate takes the meds. It works really well for her. She’s been using them for many years too, so there’s the other side of the coin. I love channels like this one, and several others on YT, too. They help a lot!
Could I ask which medications were making you feel that way? I have my first appointment for medication referral soon and I’m worried
@@danamacosko3488 Hi Dana, listen my friend, these drugs effect everyone differently. I, myself, have adverse reactions to every damn thing! Lol! Pain meds make me want to clean my house. Antihistamines make me feel like I’m on crack and about to have a heart attack. Motrin makes me really sleepy. Lol! I’m a mess 😂 So, for me, it was Prozac, Wellbutrin, Zoloft, Lexipro and a few others I can’t remember because it was 20yrs ago, but girl omg! All of it made me feel like I was jumping out of my skin! I couldn’t sleep, stay awake, smile, cry, and because I’m a touring musician for my living, it wasn’t able to perform on those meds. I didn’t feel like anything at all, but weirdly in the background, my body and mind were racing. I couldn’t stand the feeling of all that kinetic energy coursing through my body while I was sitting there like a zombie. They say it takes 30 days to acclimate your system to the medication, but I tried so many of them for 60 or sometimes even 90 days to try and get it going the right way, but I was performing badly, started losing contracts for work, and feeling like I was going to have a breakdown.
Again, this is just my experience: I stopped trying to find drugs to fix me, and just divorced my husband! Like I said, that was 20yrs ago and I’m doing fine. For me, the meds made my life worse. Talking to a therapist and my trusted and loyal girlfriends is what gets me through life, but for some people, the meds really do help a lot! My room mate takes them (thank god! She’s happy and balanced and feels good all the time! She takes Prozac) I hope my very long winded reply helps in some way. I’m here for you if you need me. Hugs from Las Vegas ❤️
there's no meds for BPD, only meds that counteract the highs and lows that the disorder brings. since being diagnosed, I've decided against starting meds. the psych told me right away that I should be on fluoxetine and I told them I wanted to do research first.
I don't want to lose the ability to have highs and lows. that's what the human experience is about. I'm going to try DBT and see how that goes for me instead. I was on citalopram a few years ago and it made me go into psychosis and almost unalive myself. I don't think I can do meds lol
Shoutout to all my fellow bordercups trying to educate themselves about their condition. You’re on the right path to improving mental health.
I've never heard the phrase bordercup used before, but it honestly just made my day lol
@Digby Dooright it sounds like a brand for a menstrual cup...
@@trapcounty4648 then that's totally fine too, you're still trying to educate yourself with the intent of improving your mental health ^^
Hell yes! Bordercup, I love it. My new self descriptor 😎
its so fucking tiring though lol.
the fact that no one knows who I really am makes me depressed. and by everyone that means me too
I feel this. The unstable self is one of the worst symptoms imo.
I know... I got diagnosed with depression 3 years ago, but it turned out to be bpd. It's confusing, even for us. Separating your mental disorder from you as a person is probably one of the hardest things you'll ever do, but it's so worth it. You aren't your bpd. I know every mood swing feels like a tsunami, but that's okay. Keep going love
same
Me too.. my boyfriend questions my honesty a lot😪
i really felt the last line, it feels like i dont know myself and my emotions and how to handle them, just feels empty
I'm not diagnosed with BPD and am not self-diagnosing either with this video. But these similar symptoms I go through really cost me my relationship with people. I have always assumed things and made impulsive decisions without even thinking. I overthink a lot and end up thinking the wrong thing. I just hope I get the help I need whatever the case is.
ADHD is very similar with its symptoms, I thought I had BPD, but I was diagnosed with ADHD and it makes complete sense. I'd look into the possibility of both, maybe even mild autism would be a good idea to look into, as it can present in similar ways.
SAME!!😢
Find some support.
This whole time I’ve been thinking my depression has come back but I truly believe it bpd now . The guilt I get for the strong hatred I sometimes get towards close people to me for the slightest errors . Even more the feeling of being empty and not understanding who I am for years on end :(
As someone who has BPD, I can confidently say that this alone has ruined a lot of relationships/bonds w people in general for me. It isn't easy but with the help of therapy and antidepressants (cus i have a whole slue of mental things going on) I'm getting better. If I can do it, so do you. Stay strong
Reach out to the name on my channel above 👆🏼 he got me psychedelics that cured me
I'm glad your doing better! I think that maybe I have a mental disorder but I'm gonna have to reach out to someone for a full diagnosis. I've been diagnosed with mild depression and anxiety, and I think it's important that I reach out to someone who can help so nothing gets worse.
And my sister may have bipolar disorder so it could be that.
@@AngryZukoHere I highly recommend that you seek the help you want/need. Getting started on your healing journey will do so so much for you. I truly hope the best for both you and your sister. Take care
@@Noffilus Thank you 😊
Yes, same here. I lost some friends over the years...relationsgips were ruined...that hurts...
My fiancé had BPD but we figured it too late and he didn’t survive his drug habit. My relationship with him was the best and worst relationship of my lifetime. He was a beautiful soul and had so much left to do in life. His son and I miss him everyday. Do not take this lightly if you or loved one are in this situation. Please seek help before it’s too late. Do not give up! You are worth it.
Im so sorry for your loss.
Oh thank you so much! He is deeply missed, and we will see him again one day. One thing I do know for certain... our souls never die. He came to me in a lucid dream, giving me so much love and hope❤️💫
I'm really sorry for your loss. I think my partner is dealing with me in the same way. I was currently diagnosed with BPD and it's really hard for both of us. He's trying to be patient and I'm trying not to take it out on him, even when it's too much. And the thought of hurting him is one of the few things that sometimes keeping me for hurting myself too. I feel you 🌠
Its painful reading this and thinking, this is probably how my fiancee feels. I need to get a life and get better.
I hope you and your son are OK, I bet his dad would have loved him so much. I am so, so sorry if I am out of line to say that.
I am trying to beat drugs and BPD too.
It took extreme patience and unrelenting support from my family, but I've been successfully treated for BPD. BPD is a nightmare to suffer through, so anyone who has BPD and is struggling please know treatment is available. My life has improved so much and (aside from the insane reality we currently live in) is stable. It was really hard to get to this point and it took years, but I'm so glad I got where I am now. It's something you have to maintain, find the right treatment team, and identify when you need to use coping skills, but it's possible.
Can I ask if you are taking medication, or is it through therapy and coping skills that you've been successful?
@savannahhenry8323 how long did it take to treat this? And how did you treat it? Appreciate your response.
I have severe BPD that, although it's gotten better with age, seriously interferes with my daily life. However, I've also been happily married for 10 years. BPD is not a hopeless curse. It's important to be aware of your symptoms and how the disorder uniquely presents within you and do your best to minimize those symptoms. It takes A LOT of internal work and transparency with yourself and others. The second half of the equation is to find stable support. You can be happy and loved with BPD. Hang in there, everyone.
*9 Things You Need to Know About BPD*
*1.* Fear of abandonment 0:57
*2.* Persistent and wide mood swings 1:16
*3.* Paranoid thinking 1:48
*4.* Emptiness 2:16
*5.* Impulsivity 2:52
*6.* Splitting 3:22
*7.* Trust issues 4:00
*8.* Risk factors for development can be environmental and/or inherited 4:26
*9.* Change in interest and values 4:55
thanks for the video! 💛
xoxo -Gossip Girl thank you.
Thankss
** 2. 1:16
Chantelle Rutherford my bad, thank you!
thanks!
“People with PBD are not necessarily bad people, they are people in need of support.”
That line really bothered me. Most often, people with BPD were victims of childhood abuse...at the hands of people who were not necessarily good people. That one line soured me, so trite and condescending.
@@rachelrosen5501 almost implies that most people with the condition are.
@@reticull7035 she's just saying that we have to be careful with our judgements.. that BPD doesn't make a person bad, even though in some situations that's what it seems.. if a person is really bad, it's not from having a borderline personality disorder.
@@yuukoichihara5109 what makes someone really bad?
@@reticull7035 basically, people who do bad things to others.. intentionally. so,
they use people for their own gain and don't care if their actions cause harm to others. most cases they do just to cause harm to them.. just because they think it's fun.
I dated a girl with BPD, she was the sweetest person I've known, in fact at the moment I thought she was the love of my life. But yeah, I tried and failed to provide her with the comfort she needed. I did everything I could to reassure her I loved her, through any means, gifts, words, actions, remembering details, but her mood swings started tearing my heart apart. I don't want to victimize myself here, it's just like, I had to give up on her. I'd still so everything to make her happy. I wish we could still be friends in the future, I'm really glad I had the opportunity to know her.
😩
@@ashleybird yeah you are totally right, I should mess up my own mental health to try and fail to please another person, thanks Ashley, you are so smart!!
@@ashleybird who the hell are you to tell me i didn't love her unconditionally? I went through a lot of stress and put a ton of effort in making a comfortable space for her just for her to tell me she was fed up with me, then i gave up on trying. Don't ever go on the internet telling people what you think they should have done, know-it-all
@Ashley dear Ashley, he is right. People diagnosed with BPD are really difficult to put up with. They idealize you one moment and when they are happy you think they are the funniest and smartest person you've ever met, but after a while pr even after some hours they easily belittle you and leave you confused, shocked, and miserable. I've gone through this and I know how much this is stressful.
@@ashleybird i didn't leave wtf, she left first, why do you think you know MY story?
BDP affects self perception & relationships, and affected people experiment emotional instability.
Here are the 9 facts mentionned in the video:
#1 - fear of abandonment
#2 - persistent and wide mood swings
#3 - paranoid thinking
#4 - emptiness
#5 - impulsivity
#6 - splitting
#7 - trust issues
#8 - risk factors can be environmental or genetic
#9 - change in interest and valaues
I'm 8 out of nine. So what?
I'm so good at beginnings, but in the end I always seem to destroy everything, including myself.
Is there ever truly an end?
@@Psych2go You know that's a good question. Guess it all depends in what you believe in and what happens after. But they also say everything eventually ends right? That both good and bad things, eventually come to an end.
@xuxalush same. I'm currently on a break from my bf because of this.
Man i feel the exact same way, i’m very good at connecting with people at first, but the moment i started really being friends with them i start to isolate because i’m so terrified of them leaving me or whatever and end up saying things i regret to try and keep them at somewhat of a distance
@@tarahendrickson1208 same here I lost my girlfriend because I got to paranoid over a long distance relationship. The only way I saw to get her back was trying to get more and more attention. I love her so much, but now I hate life
I have BPD and it’s definitely a struggle, reality for me looks way different for you. I’m consistently tired and talked down to, labeled as crazy, and forgotten about because people don’t want to be around the crazy guy.
I feels. Being a bit unstable and impulsive doesnt make us crazy. We feel things strong af
I’m with you... my sister called me an attention seeker after i opened up about my condition. Its like im always wrong either way unless i do things their way 🤷🏻♀️
Hi...could you really elaborate on BPD...I'm trying to self diagnose 🤭
Hugs. You’re not alone 🌸💙
with YANKEH I wouldn’t try to self diagnose tbh you can talk to someone about your symptoms which would be smarter in my opinion
I am diagnosed with BPD and This video couldn’t be more right, I’ve shared this video with all my closest friends just to give them the further understanding of what is happening in my mind. Thank you for this video
my mom has BPD. Until I watched this video I had no idea what BPD really was. I think now I know how to understand from my mom's perspective. I was so blinded by my own anger toward her that I never thought of how she felt. Hopefully, I can improve myself from here and on.
Nine things about BPD you need to know:
1. Fear of abandonment
2. Persistent and wide mood swings
3. Paranoid thinking
4. Emptiness/drug use
5. Impulsivity
6. Splitting (id. no middle ground, very high or very low
7. Trust Issues
8. Risk factors for development can be environmental and/or inherited (childhood trauma starts in early adulthood)
9. Change in interest and values
@@willnicholson18 LMFAO
@@willnicholson18 my mother has borderline personality disorder I live over 2 hours away there's a reason for that. It was unbearable to grow up in that household. She has the essence of Amber Heard but is also dangerous to others. She refuses to get help. I sent her a mother's Day card and a text and now she's playing that she never received it or is acknowledging it because she wants her way in her way is to get me on the phone directly so she can lash out at me because she's having a bad day. I sent her a follow-up text after she left the voicemail saying she needed to talk to me I told her to text me no response again. The only way I can communicate with her is through email and texting. Every time I have a conversation with her I can count on one thing she'll rip me apart and make me feel bad and try to make me feel that it's all my fault. You know what she also has never told a lie or been dishonest in any way. Yeah she's a real Mary Poppins
@@willnicholson18 💀
@@alisarsour8552 im really sorry ab that. hope youre ok
Also, having and relating to all of these things does not mean you have BPD. I encourage people to NOT diagnose themselves with BPD just because they can relate to the condition. Always get a professional diagnosis. This comment is not for anyone in particular. Just a generalized comment, because people online have a habit of jumping to conclusions.
As someone with BPD, I really relate to fear of abandonment, mood swings, trust issues and emptiness.
I have BPD.. and I’m a introvert I’m glad to know I’m not alone and there are other ppl without who is willing to understand.. 🙏🏽❤️ Thank you
You know my first time finding this video I almost started crying due to the past of never having a title for what my mental state goes through, thank you for helping me find how to go about getting help keep doing what your doing. Also your voice is very beuatiful and relaxing so I still come back just to calm down and re think my life.
My soon to be ex wife has BPD. I did all the counseling and classes books, ect to try and better myself. When she was diagnosed I watched videos on BPD and the such to educate myself. To avoid triggers, always reassuring, not engaging the outburst. I still got sent to jail for doing nothing except love her and try to sort through BPD with her. She would call police during outbursts and me being a big man always took the fall. Even if I wasn't the outbursts target. I am facing more jail time yet because of BPD unregulated in her life. She has done little to help herself with this disorder. She is a great, loving, kind, and a perfect wife, except BPD. I don't blame her I blame BPD and the trauma that as caused it I know she didn't mean it and can't control it. I love her so much. The love of my life!!!! BPD has taken most my family and friends from my life. Has taken my freedom, and self worth away. I just can't do it anymore!!!! If I stayed suicide was my next option. I had to leave which I know is abandonment, and a big trigger. I miss her so much, but my life can't take it any longer. I cry as I type these words for what bpd has taken from me. I need help. I hope sharing this helps others, because all of the other comments don't. It's like listening to a mellow BPD episode. It's sad, I'm sad. I feel like the only one out there with these troubles.
I’m so sorry about this.
Daryl, I am so sorry to hear you are going through this. I went through a period of time years ago that felt as you describe. Someone I care so deeply for was arrested for driving under the influence. Seeing her for the traumatized kid she was, I was crushed to see her sequela of the chronic, multidimensional, enveloping abuse she experienced. There were difficult sacrifices associated with my involvement in her life as well. I've had many painful experiences in life before and since and looking back 17 years later, feeling a helpless observer to the suffering I witnessed remains one of the top most painful times of my life. When I was involved, it was painful. When I wasn't involved, it was painful. While I promise you are not alone in what you experience, I connect with the less common capacity for deep empathy conveyed in your post- that can make it so intensely that much more painful! I wonder if it would help to try to connect with other people in your area with a similar experience- maybe a group therapy experience or meet up. Things can get better for your ex if she can find a therapist she with whom she can take the leap of trust who is both competent and caring. I wish you both future peace and wellness! Hugs
I'm so sorry about this and I want you to know you are a hero in my book for sticking it out as long as you did. I have BPD and often feel attacked by my family when they haven't actually done anything wrong. It's hard to have false memories and experiences but that doesn't mean our love ones deserve to face consequences for things they didn't do! Hopefully she will get therapy so she can heal and learn to adapt and be in a healthier state. Till then it is better for you to put boundaries and distance. Also find healthy relationships and people in your life. I also recommend therapy/counseling for you. That is a heavy burden you have dealt with a trained professional with understanding of BPD and what the families go through will be able to help you heal and make this an easier process! I wish you all the best!
this may sound unkind but you should have left sooner. you cant "fix" someone else. and you cant remove a disorder from someone.
@@cridow he's probably meaning for her to get support and a better understanding of herself and her condition. Obviously in timr managing her condition. I wouldn't jump to what you've just said. Especially how much he's been through. That is unkind.
.-. Me cutting off men I’ve talked to bc I felt the text messages change from “goodmorning” to “gm”
me cutting off my parents when they asked me to turn off the kitchen light too mean.
feels
Why do I feel this... literally scared the girl I’m talking to is going to stop caring or I’ll get a change like this and my mind will just 💥
Holy shit, is that why she cut me off
Me cutting- uh oh yeah
As someone who was diagnosed with BPD I feel this video so heartedly. I was diagnosed during a hospital stay for mental health in 2019. The problem was even though they diagnosed me with it, I was never actually talked too about it.
The only way I even found out was when I was looking at my discharge papers. I even brought it up to my therapist and I found that even therapists don’t want to talk about it.
I’ve had to learn everything about this on my own which has been frustrating. I’ve had to learn what this means for me and how it affects me personally. I wished that any mental health issues was talked about. I’ve felt so alone in my journey.
Me also your comment stands out to me. I was diagnosed 8years 2late with bdp and ptsd after a 3hour session i was given a leaflet which I asked could I have 3more, that was it! I continued on with anti depressant I've been on since 16 and now I turned 33 yesterday the situation is the same in need of therapy I did give the leaflets to my family members 🤔 although I had the courage to that 5 years ago they still do not understand me. My family member some are angry with me as I shut myself off whrn I feel down. I dont turn my phone on and ignore calls. I feel very much alone and feeling of I don't know who I am really. It sad as my brother is angry I've not seen or met his 1st born. Which is hurtful that he cannot see the deep depression I'm in . I'm very kind and generous n very personable never violent instead mainly anxious n very sensitive like this video said, doing everyday things feels like climbing a mountain this video put tears in my eyes 😢 I feel like I'm trapped; with my head full with so much emotional trauma from losing my loves ones in fact l have a partner but I i do isolate myself in my room this is from the world I wouldn't wish this feeling on anyone. It upsets me people watching the trial Amber heard has given really a bad name to those that suffer with BDP i do not relate to here one bit she spews lies, very self assured even able to attend a live trial showing no emotions. Myself I couldn't even go to trial even for my best interest as the distress it would cause mebshe come across cold and calculated I hope the jury see through here vile lies as I'm watching the whole trial. I wish there was more help out there.v
I was apparently diagnosed with BPD right around the same time as I was diagnosed with bipolar. I was only told about the bipolar. I didn't find out about it until I had to get my records for SSI. I was so angry. I felt like I had been betrayed by the people who were supposed to be helping me. I, too had to educate myself, by myself. Found out that apparently BPD is greatly stigmatized throughout the mental health community, supposedly because it is almost impossible to treat effectively, a sentiment that seems to linger even though DBT has been around for a while now. Of course, good luck finding someone who uses it in their practice, or even finding a group to work with. It's just so monumentally stupid and frustrating that it's such a debilitating condition and no one wants to touch it with a ten foot pole. It's no wonder that the suicide rate is so high. How can we get better if we aren't even being told we have it?
I have BPD, I am an avid #MentalHealthAwareness advocate and spoken word performer, and I love this so much. I travel the country trying to bring that awareness on stages, in classrooms, hospitals, and on my UA-cam channel, so I get excited when I see other advocates.
I have BPD and it’s absolutely exhausting. I lost all my “friends” due to it and feel incredibly lonely.
Same here
I have a friend with bpd and it's genuinely freaking hard being their friend and it starts to affect their own mental health. It hasn't affected mine yet but i fear it might. Nonetheless I'll stick with her as long as i can
The same thing happened to me. I know it’s my fault and I know I cut them off because I simply cannot trust people and fear that even the slightest things I do may make them abandon and so to avoid them leaving me, I leave them. You’re not alone :(
Same here.
Me too :( and no one cares about me even though i care about everyone. Im tired of being treated like im not worth shit. I just want someone to care for that cares for me in return
as a person with bpd I would have loved to hear about how loving and caring we are not just how stigmatized we are...
Amen to that
Yeah,we loved people so much more than we do to our selves, it's only when our bpd is triggered we turn into this.
Funny that you said that since I heard a lot, that BPD is for lack of better therm a demon possesion. People with BPD are slowly crawling into your heart only to abuse you emotionally and physically. But nevertheless it is a serious condition. I know 1 person in my live with BPD and I wish I could be 1000 miles away from them lol.
@@TVManson how is it funny? And why is it necessary to add that. They’re someone with BPD saying that it’s not all there is to their person and that was kind of a dick move to say it’s funny they say that. If you’re not meaning it in a harmful way maybe look at your phrasing or don’t say anything
Not everyone with BPD is loving and caring, though. Good and bad people have mental illnesses, so it really just depends on the person.
the happiness this gives me for it to be explained. i was diagnosed a year ago but still i love watching these
My whole life i've had moments where i was scared of being alone by myself (especially in my house), black and white thinking, self destructive behavior, and sometimes i have to go and remind myself that i am my own person because sometimes i don't recognize myself. And you aren't alone in this situation.
1. Fear of abandonment
2. Persistent & wide mood swings
3. Paranoid thinking
4. Emptiness
5. Impulsivity
6. Splitting
7. Trust issues
8. Risk factors for development can be environmental and/or inherited
9. Change in interests and values
Hope this helps
3 through 8 got me. I happened to work my way out of 1 and 2 after several years.
Ummm.. I have at least 6 of those symptoms-
why do i have all of these
Doctors made an accurate diagnosis
@@lumine6675 me too-
To all my brothers and sisters out there with this disorder. Acceptance is key. I have lived with BPD my whole life and I've now stopped fighting it. It's who I am. I am everything this video suggests. Am I ashamed? Not at all. I know I'm a sensitive and caring person, who always puts others first. May the stars shine brightly on you all!
thank you for your true words. My partner and I both are living with BPD and we accepted each other like we are from moment one. It is not always easy but being sensitive and putting others first is also the key to why it is working the way it is. May understanding find you all - love N
i hope you have an amazing day :)
I have lived with it my whole life too...the only people that accept me for who I am are my children... I live for them...thank you, love
I’m everything this video describes too but was never diagnosed with Bpd. I always thought it was social anxiety.
I’m the same way I’m very self aware just so concious I always feel alone and my girl has it but she doesn’t admit to it like I do she’s in denial of her bad ways so she won’t change I’m aware of who I am so it’s easy for me to not do certain toxic things I can always kids stop myself before I do something stupid in my relationship bcuz I’m one of those people I won’t argue unless I’m right if I’m wrong I’ll say I’m wrong but my girl can’t say she’s wrong not once in a year and a half will she say she was wrong for something
Girl you simplify things so well I actually can process what you say and you’re the sweetest, thank youu💘🫶🏼
I can attest to this, I was in Dialectical behaviour therapy for 10 long years, and today finally I can say it paid off, it is not easy, but we do get better and it can be managed with understanding and learning to live with it yourself and understanding what your triggers are. Your significant other also plays a key role in your road to "recovery"...
My boyfriend started reading the book “stop walking on eggshells” and it talks about those with BPD as if we are manipulative abusers, and it hurts. I wish he would understand the pain I feel everyday without demonizing me.
If he’s demonizing you then you should leave him immediately
He just got the wrong book,my mother study some books called ,,I hate you - do not leave me(those that have BPD understand the title meaning)",,one called ,,Healing of the child from inside",and another one called ,,How to manage your emotions and regain your autocontrol",she is trying to understand this disorder that ruined my life over the years,In matter of humans that really loved me,I lost everything,except some close familly members.I wish you best of luck Emilly.I hope you will be able to explain him somehow,that deep inside,you need him all the time.And the worst thing that can make against you will be to leave.People whit BPD,get over over abandonment from their closest people very hard. And yes, people with BPD can be manipulative abusers, I did that a lot in the past, whit the people that I known for sure that they care about me, like my mother or former fiance. I knew that If I behave in a certain way, I will receive what I want from them, so there is a lot of discernment ivolved in the middle, because if was not that, then a lot of people will BPD will be looked up in mental institutions.
@@You-rg4ec Have you ever lived with somebody whit BPD?Is not easy at all,they have always the tendency,to behave extremely bad whit their most loved ones,I know from my own life.
@@adrian-vasilebud4444 These people talk like borderlines DON'T destroy the lives around them. It's baffling the amount of cover that exists for this. I categorize these people the same as I would anyone who ruins other's lives.
@@jamesdanton9033 Thanks for the support James,for some people is not easy at all to understand that people whit BPD or NPD,behave in a certain manner whitout doing that on porpouse,I can just look at my case,a insignificant thing like a song can make me excited at the extreme,like I want to get out from my body and fly,then after half an hour,I remeber something sad,and my moral gets under 0,after another half an hour again excited about something,after half an hour down again,is no wonder that people think that you act like this on porpouse,because if I will know nothing about BPD,and I will stay some time whit a person that change his mood so often,I will think to that is completely nut or he does that on porpouse,but of course this desorder does not stops just at mood swings, especially when you are in a relationship, you loose interest fast, you think something new is better, you have something new, than you consider that what you had in the past was better,even if you had two or three consecutive good different persons in your life,whit BPD,you can not stay doing nothing,when doing nothing is the best thing for you,you always must do something,good or bad for you,you just do it,because on the spot,you are just not able to not do (whitout a lot of menthal training from the achieved by yourself alone or with special help from a profesional), something that you realize that is bad,risky or whatever negative aspect fot you,even if you was before 10 times already that posture,and the ending was not as you expected,and you know,and you know your chances for a good ending now are very small,but you do it again anyway,the same when you ar talking whit your beloved ones or even strangers.
The voice of this woman is giving me extremely calm vibes
My love of my life left me randomly. And she has BPD. I miss her everyday. But she made me the bad guy in her story. I hope that she forgives me. I pray for her daily. She is amazing on the inside and can on the out. I hope she gets the help she needs. She deserves so much more than feeling empty. I don't hate her at all.
I have bpd & I left the love of my life out impulsivity & Abandonment issues. I was afraid he would leave me first so I was waiting on a reason to leave him. He gave me that reason but I blew it out of proportion to flip the script. It’s been a year & 7 months & im still not over it. He reached out to apologize when it should’ve been the other way around! I was so relieved that he reached out so I could also apologize. There wasn’t a happy ending. We’re both Christian & I can feel our hearts pray for each other still. But he has a battle of his own. Addiction. I love him & sometimes I pray God will bring us back together for the 4th time. When I read your comment I read it from his perspective I miss him
Would you guys please pray for me and my husband, too? We are Christians also. He splits and is really scared of me and says he doesn't want to draw near to God, etc. I am being sanctified. I will pray for you both right now too.
I watched this over a year ago and was in complete in denial, but now, after being diagnosed and starting medication (and starting therapy soon) I see it now, and am thankful that I know and have ways to treat it
Bpd has taken my life away. I got a degree and can’t work because of bpd. I tried therapy and it was working. I wouldn’t want anyone to go through this. Hope all of you are well!
Everything is going to be fine. God is with you :)
I know what you mean it’s awful, I hate it and I don’t think people who don’t have BPD quite realise how exhausting it can get
They don’t let u work or u just can’t personally?? Plsss let me know !!
BPD was on the fast track to ruining my life about 5 years ago but since then with the support of good friends and family I'm in a much better place and looking forward to a lot of things right now. Please don't lose hope, it gets so much easier to live with when you understand it and learn how to manage it.
“I feel like no one loves me but you”
My older sister said this to me once and it’s one of the most bittersweet things I’ve ever heard from her. I’m naturally a very compassionate person and have always given kind gestures, from making her a glass of cold water when she had to walk to and from work in the summer to showing her a cat compilation when she was in a bad mental state. When she was diagnosed I was one of the few people who wasn’t afraid but reached out now that I “get” her. I wish more people would understand the points mentioned, I couldn’t even imagine what it must feel like with the stigma on top of it all.
It truly sucks. It’s very lonely inside my head
I’m sorry for both of you ❣️ support her at all costs
What a beautiful sister!
Thank you for this video. I have borderline personality disorder and it's so hard to deal with everyday. I plan on sharing this video with my dad. even worse with all the stupid stigmas around them or when people say they don't care or feel bad for acting out. It is the opposite. They feel beyond bad and guilty when they act out on a loved one and it hurts not always being able to control your feelings and anger.
BPD is so incredibly painful. Physically so, not just emotionally. But the emotional pain is something you can’t describe to someone who hasn’t experienced it. I feel so discouraged many days because it feels so overwhelming. Years of therapy with progress, but still so much to go and still so painful. Thank you for this video
I’m glad that there is more information now about BPD without categorizing us as crazy or abusive. You can be a good person with BPD or a bad person with BPD, but the BPD doesn’t make you bad.
Reach out to the name on my channel above 👆🏼 he got me psychedelics that helped cure my bipolar
All the people with borderline I have ever known are destructive and abusive, sorry. In pain, yes, but destructive and abusive nevertheless. They need serious therapy and not excuses for their often awful behaviors.
@@rosieposie9564 I’m not saying that some people with borderline aren’t abusive and awful. I’m saying that having this disorder doesn’t automatically make you bad. There are people with BPD that are abusive and there are abusive people in every group. BPD takes a lot of work and therapy to manage, they should be encouraged to get help not demonized. If you do something bad you can’t blame the disorder you blame yourself that’s what I’m saying.
@@WHY-gi3vf yeah you’re right …
The guy on my channel above 👆🏼 helped me recover with he’s products
@rosie posie
Have you ever considered that, “all of the borderlines I have ever known” actually means, the only BPD people who’ve had symptoms you can observe? Not a lot of people know i’m BPD, and they would probably say something like you. But it would be false. You meet people with all sorts of mental/physical diagnoses every day and have no idea because they’re just like everyone else.
Me after every fact listed about Bpd:
"Ahh yes... relatable."
"Mhm true."
"This is so accurate."
literally!! after I was diagnosed i read about it and it all made so much sense.
It's when you say "wtf, when were they reading my diary; in fact, when did I start writing the diary they clearly just read?".
@@AdrianColley ＼(°o°)／
This explains so much..I have been diagnosed with BPD and I felt like a roller coaster..its slowed down but man what a ride my mind is taking me on..affected my relationships with even my kids. My daughter & sons has been my inspiration to get answers and treatment..Thank you
Having BPD makes me destroy my own life
As someone who has bpd and grew up with a mom with bpd, self awareness will get you so far. I feel so stable here recently. It’s stayed consistent for a few months now. Always look at yourself first before placing blame. Think before you speak. Breathe. Exercise too. I go for walks/runs with my dog every weekend. My job involves moving and working up a sweat too. This helps me feel stable and gives me confidence in myself.
Anyone who is in a toxic relationship with someone who has bpd, do not take blame repeatedly. Don’t stay if they never try self awareness. It’ll be war forever. Sorry if this offends anyone. But it’s the truth.
I’m living this, my wife has undiagnosed bpd.. every time I’ve confronted her about her issues she’s left me. She’s cheated, lied and lies about me physically abusing her. Blames everything on me when I have accepted so much. I keep praying she will come home but she acts like she hates me… I literally went from her best friend to hated over night.
@@derekwilliams9272 I’m so sorry to hear this. I know I don’t know everything about your relationship but I would suggest letting her go. Pray the hurt away. Pray the desperation to have her back away. It will get easier. Grow to learn who you are without her. You are important. You are your own person. Find him and you’ll never look back. When she comes back to you (because she will) explain to her why you will not go on like this. Let that hit her like a ton of bricks. That you’re the one in control of the dynamic now. You decide how you’re going to feel. Not her. That will turn her world upside down. She has no more control over you. That’ll burn so badly. I promise she’ll realize how fucked up she is. Just don’t spend your time worrying about it. Find you!
@@hollypocket6684 really think she will come back? I agree with moving forward with myself and letting time play out… but she’s my wife and I truly love her and don’t want our relationship to fall victim to bpd.
@@derekwilliams9272 I know her coming back is all you can think about. I’m sorry about that. If she cannot change after your ultimatum, yes you should let go for your own good. Life will get easier after her, I promise. Just stay with God and you’ll be okay. Pray away that gut wrenching feeling every time you remember what’s happening. Feel the grief but don’t dwell on it. And please do not be focused on her coming back to you. Just forget about it and do you. Don’t feed into it anymore.
Youre 100% correct. Im diagnosed BPD and didnt happen until i was 22 BUT with that diagnosis i was able to watch myself and figure out the appropriate times to react and to be as calm as posssible while reacting. Before i just thought i was care free, but i wasnt, i was manic. Now i can confidently say that im stable and confident the only symptom i cant seem to get around are the inrusive thoughts that usually cause splitting, to quiet them down i just listen to music constantly unless im home.
As someone who's diagnosed with BPD, the best advice I can give to a person whether a friend or a partner to somebody with this illness, is to practice patience. Patience is key, above all else. It will not always be so reactive. Trust is scary, within time they'll learn to believe in you if you're patient with them.
You are so right, exactly that works in my case, if I see that somebody really cares about me, I remain loyal forever, and really make efforts to improve for a greater good.
As a person having been married to someone with BPD, the best advice I can give is: don't put up with all the shit. Don't accept erratic behavior, mood swings, violence etc. People with BPD tend to be very narcissistic and gravitate to themselves, not realizing the severity of their illness, thinking that the world is strange - not them. They need help and if they refuse to get it - leave. And for the love of God - don't have children until the illness is thoroughly under control.
@@ChefPelle That sounds like a quite severe type, depends a lot what type from those 4, the person has.
@@adrian-vasilebud4444 When children bail out and cut all ties to a parent - a mother in this case - it's pretty severe. They - the kids - finally told her that she would never see them again. She never did.
@@ChefPelle Indeed when a person does not want to accept that has an out of control problem, creates situations that can not be undone, unfortunately for all involved. Of course, a lot of people use the fact that they have BPD, as an excuse to behave whitout concerns about the harm that they do against their closest ones, and they do not try to improve themselves, although they have complete discernment over their actions.
My beautiful niece has been diagnosed with it and here I am to educate myself so I can support her.
She's had a tough life. Her grandmother (my mum) passed away from a terminal illness when she was 8, and her dad (my brother) passed away from the same terminal illness when she was 12. She's 14 now and has just been diagnosed, after punching her mother in the face. I live over 100 miles away from her but I am determined to support her as best as I can
As a person that has BPD i feel good with this video, bcs I showed this to my friends to make them understand me a bit more. I'm not good with telling them things like this because I got misunderstood, so thank you for helping me out with explaining BPD to them❤️
As someone who was diagnosed with BPD in my early 20s (I'm 34 now), I just wanted to say things can get better! Things started to stabilize for me once I finally learned to treat myself with care. It's incredibly hard, but you can get there. It doesn't solve everything immediately, but try to learn from your episodes, and don't beat yourself up. Sorry - just wanted to share. Good luck and love to all of you.
That gives me a lot of hope. I got diagnosed only recently (I'm in my early 20s), it's been a scary and exhausting journey before as well as after the diagnosis. Thank you for sharing, it means a lot to me
I love this. Truly the most important thing is time, learning and lots of patience. Its an ongoing battle.
I agree, mine has seemed to mellow out and things have gotten more stable for me. Only things I struggle hard with now is the paranoia, & binging really
I'm scared to "get there". I don't want to be like this but I don't know how to get better.
proud if you
why do i never see anyone talking about “the favorite person” :(
yes!! “the favorite person” is something that is rarely addressed and it really should be covered
I agree! The "favorite person" is a HUUUUUGE factor yet nobody ever talks about it. The "favorite person" goes through so much Hell, they should be mentioned.
I have multiple favourite people: the artists and actors whom I made into a surrogate family of role models because I didn't have parents who cared enough.
What do you mean?
@@smallpotato5445 Right. So. Basically, there is one person in your life who you put on a pedestal above all else and will sacrifice your entire life and mental wellbeing for. But it can also mean that a) you spend your entire life in constant terror that this person whom is your only reason to keep going will abandon you, and b) this can mean that there is a lot of pressure on this person as we see them as all perfect, all knowing and can make no mistakes. This means that when they do make mistakes, because humans are fallible, some people can shift to not liking them for a few days because of the black and white thinking and the abandonment issues from past trauma. It is not uncommon for abusers or toxic people to be super nice before suddenly turning on you so this is something that is ingrained in them from childhood. Everyone will leave or hurt you at some point because you aren't worthy. Which is why I get so pissed when I see these people being like, "never date a borderline, they deserve to be alone" because it perpetuates the same message their abusers taught them as a kid. You may as well hand them a noose tbh, because that attitude stops people with BPD from seeking treatment and getting better. But that is a whole other rant for another day.
I love this video, is so sweet with us. We struggle so much with this curse and people think we are intrinsically evil. Thank you.
Never went to Psychiatrist Never got diagnosed but i doubted something is wrong, being a Psychology topper i realised few things this video also helped, key is to be self conscious about our behaviour & thoughts. I always struggle but we are what we are.
The first day I'm like " I love you"
The other day I'm like " I hate everything thing "
Then the other day you need a VIP pass to talk to me.
same 🙃
Me
this is me every few hours
omg yes then it's "I feel so guilty for having self confidence" or some variation and the cycle repeats
YES
My partner revealed to me that he has BPD, and at first, I was concerned about it because I just didn't understand what it was. He needed constant reassurance of whether I loved him and had a fear of abandonment. We have been together for over 2 years and he has gotten better than when we first met. He's the sweetest man and learning more about what he goes through gave me a better understanding.
Thank you for giving him reassurance when he needs it the most. I haven't found a girl who could give me that till date. Someday:)
thank you for fighting for him. it is not easy to have this disorder.
How are you coping with the abusive and disrespectful behavior of his? Are you trying to be emotionless just to pass through the anger stage? Has he physically abused you?
not everyone with bpd is abusive @@Giorg189
@@Giorg189🙄
its eerie at how accurate the symptoms you point out are. I suffer from all of them and was diagnosed with BPD only about a year ago.
It's scary how I much I relate to those symptoms
I’ve been diagnosed with bpd, but I have “quiet/hidden” bpd. I internalize everything and have been misdiagnosed as bipolar before bpd. it’s extremely exhausting, and I find myself tired at the end of the day even if I don’t do anything physical. it’s hard, and managing it all has been the most intense trial and error of my life. I’m so glad I have strong supports that understand what I’m going through and help me through it. I wouldn’t be alive without them. 💜
Same ❤️ sending love
Same for me but I have nobody instead
Quiet BPD isn’t even a real diagnosis
A borderline suffers a kind of emotional hemophilia; [s]he lacks the clotting mechanism needed to moderate [his or her] spurts of feeling. Stimulate a passion, and the borderline emotionally bleeds to death.
Wow, well put.
I really appreciate concise language: Your clotting metaphor is elegant. It explains my last 60 years.
This is hands down THE BEST description I've ever read for BPD. Very well said.
Kati Morton describes BPD sufferers as "emotional burn victims".
As someone who has the disorder I can say that this is strangely accurate.
It's a very painful thing to live with,,
I am watching bpd videos just to understand my bpd friend more and tbh its kind of interesting learning about other mental illnesses.
Thank you guys for spreading awareness.
Adoption can cause ptsd due to being torn from the birth mother. I personally feel like it also attributes to some bpd patients.
I've been diagnosed with BPD and the comments are warming my heart. It's nice to know that people are watching this to help love, support and understand the people in their lives that they care about who have BPD. :)
Reach out to the name on my channel above 👆🏼 he got me psychedelics that cure bipolar
It's quite reassuring indeed.
I was to address that “splitting” has not only to do with b&w thinking. But it means that when we (borderliners) don’t got a hold on our emotions, we can say hurtful and bad things that we don’t even mean and want to say at first! We’ll have a feeling of remorse and shame afterwards..
So relatable
@Jesus is coming. Read the Gospel. Jesus don't care, He do nothing now lol
@Jesus is coming. Read the Gospel. its funny how u came to this video using your god to demonize us.
This is exactly what my boyfriend does, he insult me so bad and after 30 min he said 10 times sorry and if I say I don't accept his apology then he insult me again , he does it until he give and realize what he did was very bad and then he calm down
@Jesus is coming. Read the Gospel. Jesus gave me this disorder, so…..
The person who’s most likely going to become my partner has bpd. They’ve asked me to do as much research as possible. I’m happy to do this if I can be a better boyfriend to them ☺️
Consider not going into this relationship
@@bevanbuckwheatshea5520 let them learn
I was diagnosed with BPD and bipolar disorder quite some time ago. Though, it always seems like the BPD is stronger, and I've been considering going to a psychologist for a second opinion. I've been on medication for my bipolar for years and it never seems to even take the edge off. The emptiness is still there, the fear of abandonment, trust issues, thinking the world is out to get me knowing it isn't, losing control of my emotions after bottling them up... All of it. I've got every single one of these things.
It's insanely difficult to live with. No amount of acceptance makes it easier for me. Getting out of bed hurts, going to work hurts, picking up the phone is horrifying and making new friends seems impossible. Feeling intense happiness is great, but it doesn't last long and you spend so much time trying to chase that feeling to get it back. I can't look anyone in the eye anymore, because I feel like they might see too much and figure out that I'm just not fit for normal society.
I have my good days and bad days. Sometimes I accept it, sometimes I just deal with it because I have no choice. I'm lucky to have a wife who has the same disorder and knows when I'm displaying the worst flares. But I've lost so many friends, I don't go out much anymore outside of work, and life just feels like a constant cycle of nothing. The panic attacks suck the most.
I hope that people understand that we aren't monsters. This isn't something we want, and we try so very hard to be better and succeed in life. Ever since this whole fiasco with Amber Heard's public diagnosis, the stigma has gotten worse. If I could change just one thing about me with a snap of my fingers, this would be it.
But it's my reality. And it is what it is. Thank you for shedding light on this for those who do not understand.
I'm 24 and just now starting to realize I may have this. I find that I've lost almost all of my friends, to splitting. I don't know how to deal with it. I don't know what to do about it.
@@wolfmayner6274 If you are concerned about how you are interacting with others and have suspicions, I would make an appointment for a psychiatric evaluation as soon as you can. I was diagnosed around your age, and I'm glad I did before I continued to make even bigger mistakes. Speaking for myself, therapy hasn't helped much, but I can't speak for others. Seek therapy, talk to your therapist about seeking out either DBT or CBT therapy.
I know how you feel. It seems impossible, but don't give up either. The way I see it, we're all stuck on this earth whether we like it or not, and it's on us how we want to spend that time and survive.
my dad has bpd and he’s a very loving, sensitive and kindhearted person. he gets so happy at the slightest sign of us caring about him. but it’s hard to see how much he struggles with his confidence, and when his bpd is bad he either guilt trips people or becomes very passive aggressive over the smallest things :( i wish he wasn’t struggling with this disorder
my favourite description of bpd is that our emotions are our skin and it's burnt all over and even the slightest of touches can cause so much pain
I have BPD and although I've been already having clear symptoms in my childhood, I got the diagnosis very late at the age of 25. It caused many problems, not to know why I was the way I was. I hope that videos like this can reach people with BPD and help them understand themselves.❤️
I am also 25 and just got the diagnosis. I was in a loving relationship with my partner for nearly two years and became unwell and ruined it ☹️
He was my best friend from college but it’s broken now 😔
He was my best friend from college but it’s broken now 😔
He was my best friend from college but it’s broken now 😔
Today, I was diagnosed with BPD. I really appreciate this video, because I'm trying to figure out how to explain it to my family and friends, since it's hard to explain something that is just my normal
My friend has BPD and I've been educating myself about it as much as I can to understand her more. I told her this today and she said that's the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for her because no one has ever taken the time to look into her like that and it honestly broke my heart. I love her with all my heart and soul and I care for her very deeply, I just wanted to learn so I can be a better friend and partner and to be there for her with more understanding of what she struggles with
@ArisLee Where did this even come from-
@ArisLee clearly fellow organism, you’ve never had friends and you think everyone is against each other, why
♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️
🙏❤️♥️
@@pink_sky_morning4842 probably because it's a very common thing for a lot 'nice guy friends' to go out of their way to do something special when they are trying to date that person. Not saying that's the case here but it happens a lot so I get it
BPD for me has shown up like they said in my early adult hood. I struggle everyday and feel I am unlovable. It comes from the fact I was abused and neglected by my parents and sibling. I feel I am insane at times, because I get so mad over little things and later think back "wow that was very mishandled on my end." I just lost a relationship with the love of my life to due lack of trust, lack of constantly loving myself, and massive fear he was going to leave me like everyone else, and his mom would just hate me. Unfortunately I self sabotaged and made my fears happen. I am 5 days in and feeling like I literally don't have purpose and if im not someone someone wants, why continue. I black out when I get angry too or when I am so depressed I can't even focus. I am always "day dreaming" and just feel out of control. I've met all of these, but it feels good to know someone understands.
Honey you're not alone.. Many of us are suffering and it's very difficult. Take care of yourself the best way you can😊♥️
You just describe me I swear but I’m not diagnosed yet. I’m getting help soon
You explained that really well. I get you 🖤🖤🖤
This is so me and it makes me want to cry reading this. Sending love and hugs from Ghana, Africa ♥️
Yes, it's hard to overcome serious abuse by parents
My dad had a traumatizing childhood and my grandmother was abusive to him and his brothers. I think he might have BPD and it also affected me. As the oldest sibling I heard, remember a lot of arguing, screaming between my parents. My mom told me that my dad have anger issues that he has to deal with for the rest of his life. He took a long time before opening to my mom about it. He’d even make fun of some of his traumas. Of course not in front me or my brother. She told me “I know your angry and you might have every rights to be” but then she said “you need to feed that anger over wise it may consume you”. At that moment I know that I have anger issues and maybe even BPD.
that’s why we need to be nice, you don’t know how much people are scared,traumatized,sad...kindness can make someone believe also again in humans
yeah :-(