DEPRESSION... The thing that got me through major depression was low intensity, steady state cardio. I just walked on a treadmill on a slight incline for 30 minutes 3-4 times per week. It took about 6 weeks to start noticing anything but by weeks 12-16 it totally and completely lifted me out of any depression. The thing is also I havent really done any cardio since I got better (about 1 year) and im still fully not depressed anymore. Exercise is amazing and so cheap. A gym membership in the UK is £25 or so per month. Its really not that hard either especially when you start to see progress. PTSD... I still have slight PTSD symptoms (sleep and hyper arousal problems mainly) but what helped me the most was talking truthfully and completely honestly about things with my mum. I think the fact that I exercised definitely helped also. Oh and walks in nature. Real wilderness kind of nature. See the problems you face as a problem of biology, not a problem of spirituality or philosophy and how you should "love yourself" and blah blah blah. If you see it as a problem of the nervous system and neurotransmitters, you can actually systematically start tackling it. Our brains and bodies evolved to be in hunter gatherer type tribes who exercise every day, experience new things every day, are part of a team and who take care of each other. We dont live in the same way our ancestors lived anymore and I think in many ways (mental health being a huge one) that is a bad thing. Hope someone sees this and it helps.
I have PTSD and my son suffers from depression. I am trying to teach him that too. I have a little rebounder and hop on that a couple of minutes several times a day. It is amazing how it can make anxiety disappear.
@@dm5129 Reduce negative thoughts with a simple practice to feel better. . Your breath is directly related to your mind [brain] causing negative thoughts-anxiety. For a relaxed life sit on a chair, back straight, eyes closed, be as still as possible and observe the sensations of your incoming--outgoing breath at the entrance of the nostrils for around 5-10-15 minutes or more. Don’t fight your thoughts. Slowly the mind will relax. No deep breathing needed. Day or night before sleep sit or lie down and observe your breath. Like me, make this a lifetime daily habit to have a good life. Avoid constipation as it affects the mind. Best wishes Shyaaam Sir. -Counsellor.
@@JohnDoe-wz6xi Trans form from within. Reduce negative thoughts with a simple practice to feel better. . Your breath is directly related to your mind [brain] causing negative thoughts-anxiety. For a relaxed life sit on a chair, back straight, eyes closed, be as still as possible and observe the sensations of your incoming--outgoing breath at the entrance of the nostrils for around 5-10-15 minutes or more. Don’t fight your thoughts. Slowly the mind will relax. No deep breathing needed. Day or night before sleep sit or lie down and observe your breath. Like me, make this a lifetime daily habit to have a good life. Avoid constipation as it affects the mind. Best wishes Shyaaam Sir. -Counsellor.
Narcissistic abuse is the worst. I did not even know what narcissistic meant until PTSD forced me to explore that. It was present in all years of my life, especially during an abusive marriage that I had no idea was abusive. And during a childhood during which I also did not understand that I was abused. It culminated in me contracting PTSD after being stalked by an obsessive person. I have never fully understood how people abused me during the years and to this day PTSD causes terrible triggers during which I only understand that it has something to do with my past but not fully understanding why a certain person or certain behavior causes such awful triggers. The fallout of the stalking was what intensified my PTSD, that much I know, so many people who literally enjoyed to abuse me, the victim, afterwards. But it did lead to a better understanding of which people I would have to steer away from anyways in order to save my own sanity and to escape abuse before it even happens.
From the bottom of my heart; thank you, thank you, thank you so much. As a clinical psychologist you know the extent of how much anxiety/PTSD can disrupt ones life. The information you gave me has finally allowed me to start the healing process and take back my life. Much appreciated, sir. Remember people; you can't be relaxed and anxious at the same time! :D
Wow. I wish I had seen this a few years ago thank you. My ptsd symptoms were through the roof. There were days I was so frozen I couldn’t move. I started yoga nidra every day two years ago. It has been a life changer. I also started somatic experiencing therapy 6 months ago, and that’s really helping feel safe in my body. Thanks!
Dr. Malkin, I spent thousands and thousands in different types of therapy that did not work.....but they insisted that they would be able to help or even cure me. They all asked me to go through and remember childhood, and said they would eventually also have me walk through the recent event that I believed caused me to have PTSD ( I was diagnosed) as a component to the therapy. 6 months into it I had a nervous breakdown and dropped all forms of therapy. Then I went to visit my mother in Canada who asked me to try and find peace, and helped me focus on yoga, meditation, and self-healing exercises. This helped everything....then I came upon your video and it explains why "finding my happy place" has been the only effective treatment. As she said, "You can't fight the darkness, but if you bring in the light - darkness cannot persist." I will pursue each of the methods you mentioned and keep watching your videos as a part of finding the light to fill my life with. Thank you.
I had to have open heart surgery out of the blue and it’s been a struggle to get over that. I was 43. I now have to take meds daily and that’s making it hard to get over the trauma of everything that happened and how fast it all went.
I used to suffer from panic attacks on highways. I came out of it all through self work and meditation. There is a particular book, called “Living Fearlessly”, by Paramahansa Yogananda, that helped me truly and that was the initial turning point. In that book the fear is described as static. That was a powerful perception turn for me (I was pregnant and in deep burnout when I read it) and that was the beginning of the U turn.
My ptsd was given to me by abuse I received from sergeants, after the army I could trust no one in military like positions, local police were okay, but the higher echelons like fed, etc, since it was army who gave me abuse, I could not trust ever, and it makes me feel like I have to have a weapon on me for protection, because those people shattered my trust in the military. Trust no one! If you've been harrassed by gov, you know what it feels like to be bullied, and the gov does this now through ICE, DHS, and other organizations. It's Nazi Germany in replay.
It is a Nazi replay because those kind of people are just as callous. The Nazi times are not over, people like that are in our midst. My abuse happened on a military base as well, even though I was not enlisted in the Services. I saw first hand how not being helped is the regular decision of service members when bad things happen. I trust people but then they trigger me terribly with actions and it is horrible to know that there are so many monsters who I think are normal people. I always explore things, feelings, privately despite the fact that I am often being forced by others to make certain decisions. But I need time to personally explore happenings and feelings by myself before I could even ever make a decision. Often times I just re explore things that happened with other people and it is unfortunate that despite me being so private and not reaching out to certain people while just exploring what I think makes others being so intrusive. People that try to force me to make decisions in a hurry are my pet peeve.
Healing is needed definitely from races that experience traumatic past in history and the things we experienced on personal levels we've learned to jus live with but affects our lives
Very helpful . I was waiting outside a store for it to quit raining a car lost control and ran me over pushing me back into the store . I remember very little of the accident but lost 4 toes on the sceen of the accident and numerous other injuries . I worked hard on physical recovery for a year . Now the PTSD has kicked in . Going to look for the second video
What helped me was meditation, psych therapy, educating myself on why I was suffering as I was (reading as well as therapy) and above all, to really understand the notion that EMOTION ALWAYS FOLLOWS FOCUS. To know that is extremely empowering. ;) Once again, thank you so much, Dr. Craig. Keep fighting the good fight! lol :)
Where do I begin to thank you for your book and videos; this video is one I have been needing for a while. Thank you again for all you've provided with your research and empathetic approach. Very much appreciated, and with gratitude!
This is fantastic! Thanks so much for sharing this info with us =). It's good to see a new video on here from you. I can personally vouch for yoga, meditation, and mindfulness practices as I have been writing about and applying this over the last several years, and one of my favorite long-term clients (bosses? lol) just recently released a 30-day program to the public that has already gone through clinical trials for things like stress management and even addiction recovery (the My Mindful Moments Program, in association with Executive Coaching University). I had the honor of being the narrator and offering input for a lot of the content, including a VR body scan meditation, which is one aspect of how I try to help myself heal (working on these types of projects, either with others or independently). I think the most beautiful thing about mindfulness practice is that you don't have to constantly meditate (although 20 minutes a day is perfect lol); it becomes a habit. So in each moment, especially when emotionally triggered, you have the ability to pause, feel the trigger, recognize it as such, and respond appropriately (and practice doing so). This doesn't mean perfection; it just means practice and doing what you can to be your best self. Thanks again! I am still working my way through some life challenges (it's past the breakdown point and at the beginning of the rebuild point, if that makes sense), but am loving your book so far! I appreciate you taking the time to share your thoughts on your channel as well, as this is where I am most often now that I'm producing more content myself, so I am very much looking forward to the second part. I hope you have a wonderful weekend! Jen
Thank you so much for you're wonderful comment! I hope to be able to do more videos, though I do just sort of squeeze them in. Sounds like you've done amazingly with your mindfulness work. So powerful--and I appreciate you're sharing your success with it here. So glad you're loving Rethinking Narcissism!
Thank you for the insights and tools to help move toward a better life. I am the oldest daughter (2nd sibling) in a family of 9 children. Narcissism has taken a huge toll on my family. My father was distressed that, at the time of his death, it had torn my family apart. I am, regrettably, moving toward "no contact" after many years of trying to sustain my beloved father's vision for our family. (He passed away a few years ago, isolated by my mother who increased his distress during his final months and days and isolated him from his children.) I have mourned the fact of "leaving", as I believe we are "here" to love and support each other. That vision has, repeatedly, proven unattainable. It is a tremendous and very sad waste of life and some of the most meaningful opportunities it offers - for love, laughter, acceptance and compassion.
Deirdre Christenberry so incredibly sad. My heart breaks when I hear stories like this-all too familiar to me. I’m glad you’ve found your healing path. That’s huge, brave, and really all that matters. Thank you for your comment. I wish you continued healing. #courage (which you already have in spades).
You are fantastic. Best explanation I have ever heard on PTSD, and it inspires a natural call to action through education. I am going to watch all your videos. Thanks.
I love the tone of your voice. I realize that I have all three of those things that you mentioned. Chronic hyperarousal, hyper vigilance and the last one. The sympathetic n.s. is on overdrive from 60 years of intense trauma. I feel hopeless but I’m going to try your next video.
What about the freeze response? As in dissociation, hypo arousal, depression,fatigue ? These can also be symptoms. All connected to the vagus nerve. PMR is quite outdated and in some clients can increase anxiety,blood pressure and stress response. Also, meditation is very difficult,if not impossible when in a fight or flight state. Moving the body and getting rid of excess and adrenaline is often best and easier in my opinion. personally I find yoga and walking most helpful, long out breaths to slow heart rate,rhythm, music and sensory experiencing. We need to connect with our body first and help it to calm down before engaging the rational mind. Stephen Porges, Peter Levine and Bessel van der Kolk are worth noting
Everyone has their favorites. They're all capable of activating a parasympathetic response. Use what works. Paradoxical anxiety has been noted with all these techniques, not just PMR, which is still quite effective for some but not all people (which is why its nice we have a range to the same pathways). As I state in the video, none of these is likely to pull anyone out of an intense fight or flight state. Also, just to clarify for the public, progressive muscle relaxation has decades of journal articles devoted to its efficacy, some as recent as 2015. It's still used in controlled studies. You're correct that freeze is part of the fight or flight response. Love the works of Levine at al. Especially Bessel's The Body Keeps Score. All these techniques involve mindfulness and or somatic focus while relaxing. The best meditations (breathing) involve focus on the body. That's the one I teach.
Thank you Dr. Malkin. There's so much junk going on in my life I can't even think. As a survivor of childhood sexual abuse and physical, emotional and verbal abuse, I have so much anxiety I can barely function. Now there's a lot of awful things going on in my family centered around drug addiction and the lack of care for my granndchilren by their mother, my daughter. Anyway it would take a while to tell you all garbage. But I have inflammatory bowel disease so all the stress keeps me sick and in pain. Looking for some help to manage my stress. I have been diagnosed with PTSD, Anxiety, depression and dissociative disorder.
Rea, I'm 57 and still get flashbacks (PTSD). I have an autoimmune disease which I'm sure the root of it is childhood sexual abuse. I don't have any answers... I tried to tell but my family wouldn't listen.
This reply is late but I will say that if you can break with your family, and begin therapy when you’re ready, eventually you’ll begin to heal. It may take years, but it will be worth it.
Thank you Craig, Thanks so very VERY much!. Please Do keep posting your insights and help here online. Your of more help than you may ever truely know. Complex P.T.S.D was & remains a VERY 'hard pill' to accept personally, and then to explain on to others, be they Personal friends and/or medical persons alike. Its so little understood and grossly under diagnosed...... Years of Isolation, confusion & private torment are not at all uncommon before any help is offered or accessible to we that develop it. Mine has been so buried and confused from years of other issues, possibly decades of happenings and complexities....., then dismissed and buried beneath years of self-medication and harm. So very many acquaintance Ive had, those alive still all those so sorely lost over time, could they have still survived with the insight such as you are offering here.? Again, Thank you, and please, keep your insights up and coming. Gratefully Yours, Marcus S Collinge, Dunedin, New Zealand.
I’ve experienced so much stress over my life that I am now always hot. I live in Canada and I don’t head my home even when it’s -20 Celsius. I have had this for the past 3-4 years or so and on top of being hot all the time , the slightest tiniest event gives me a momentary hot flash. It could be when I’m driving and I have to slam on the breaks, you name it. I have trained by brain to react this way and this is now permanent. After having multiple panicked attacks, hospitalized because my entire body shut down, my entire body was violently shaking and I even up in the ER. After having multiple panic arrache events, I basically woke up one day and was always hot and thought it was told that it was chronic fatigue with it wasn’t. I work out very intensely 3-4 week with HIIT training followed by a sauna. I don’t know how to train my brain to reverse this problem. I am 45 and im in very good health. At a subconscious level, my entire nervous system is on constant alert and I would greatly appreciate some guidance. Thank you.
You sound much like me but I'm disabled & cannot exercise. Had to stop taking anxiety meds when had to begin chemo for leukemia. I cannot train my mind to relax so no hope.
Noushka Bear that’s crazy, same with me?! I actually just got my bloodwork done to check for hyperthyroidism but my thyroid came back normal. My doctor noticed how sweaty I was even though it was cool in the office and I too have been experiencing this for the last three years. I am 43, and he thought it to be odd I would get so heated like that everyday.
Hello I had that problem too he called it internal heat my Siddha doctor prescribed me abhayanga (self massage with oil ) once a week . I felt cool and my mind is calm and clear .
Malkin, very well done in so many ways. First, you seem to recognize that people who have PTSD or other anxiety issues need to hear a calming, soothing voice, which you've employed here. Excellent way to begin. The information is accurate, entirely relevants, broken down into language and an explanation that most lay people can readily understand: another win. Then you're going to follow this up with a part 2. Including yoga was a nice touch, as yoga has tremendous healing effects on the body when it is practiced calmly and reasonably (and not the trendy yoga where your listen to hard rock or push your body beyond it's current limits). There's much to appreciate and respect about this video. Well executed! (and it definitely needs to get into the hands of as many people as possible) EDIT: Also, you better enjoy that heat while you can. Boston has a summer that comes and goes in the blink of an eye. : )
So glad you found it helpful, Tracy! Let me know how it goes :-) you may find FB filters out the video so very few people see it. I've discovered sharing a screen shot of the video plus the link gets around the throttling algorithm. FB really doesn't seem to like youtube direct shares.
Dr. Craig Malkin - it worked fine - maybe in groups it works better. Facebook actually sent some staff to my meetup to see how a live group works vs a Facebook group. So maybe they are trying to cater to the support world
I have CPTSD and these videos are the most concise and helpful I’ve found. Really appreciate you putting these videos up and making help easily accessible. 🙏🏻
I really appreciate the real concrete advice I can try to put into use and that it doesn't involve lessening my stress I'm subjected to because with my circumstances I can't, I just have to learn to manage where I am. I've definitely been having trouble with the stress stacking and feeling all of my symptoms are getting on top of me and it's so frustrating being aware is not enough. Thanks for making this so simple, I'll try it out 😊
Sarah, Reduce negative thoughts with a simple practice to feel better. . Your breath is directly related to your mind [brain] causing negative thoughts-anxiety. For a relaxed life sit on a chair, back straight, eyes closed, be as still as possible and observe the sensations of your incoming--outgoing breath at the entrance of the nostrils for around 5-10-15 minutes or more. Don’t fight your thoughts. Slowly the mind will relax. No deep breathing needed. Day or night before sleep sit or lie down and observe your breath. Like me, make this a lifetime daily habit to have a good life. Avoid constipation as it affects the mind. Best wishes Shyaaam Sir. -Counsellor.
Stress and trauma are BOTH cumulative. Exposure therapy sucks for me. I lived it all enough. I don't need to do it again. I'm working diligently to learn and master Meditation. My trauma symptoms are so bad now, that I'm locked inside my little world, desperately trying to avoid the pain of triggered symptoms. The fear alone is dramatic.
Exposure doesn't work for high anxiety conditions because it causes the same emotional response your brain is trying to forget. It makes absolutely no sense. The same goes for CBT, EFT, meditation, relaxation, etc...none of them can create non-anxious neural pathways. This is not my opinion, it's neurological and psychophysiological science.
Dr Craig Malkin, the timing of your video is strangely perfect. The past few days I've been thinking so much about how practising Nadi Sodhan (alternate nostril breathing) has helped me in the past with my alcohol addiction. It was a long time ago, about 15 years ago, when I was VERY disciplined with the Pranayama practise. It made me stop drinking alcohol. But for some reason, and I can't remember anymore, I stopped the daily breathing exercises, and fast forward about 15 years, I'm averaging 55 Standard drinks per week. (a bottle of port most days) My doctor is horrified and people are mystified that I can drink so much and still look 10 years younger than I am. (Must be my Transylvanian Vampire ancestry) I can't watch TV, gave my TV away, I do not, I cannot look at anything to do with animal abuse on the Internet, I'm sure childhood traumas have a lot to do with it. But the question I have been asking myself over the past few days is this: How to will yourself to do the daily practise again, in order to soothe your parasympathetic nervous system? I know it worked for me in the past, I stopped drinking. Right now I struggle with the motivational factor: If you know what is going to make you feel better, but you don't want to do it, what the heck is going on? Maybe my post will inspire you to make another video, because honestly, I'm at the end, my intellect just can't solve this problem, and the booze might get the upper hand and win. It's a puzzle that I can't solve.
Sissi I’m so sorry to hear about the slip back to drinking you’ve found yourself in. But given that you’ve been on track to recovery, we know *you can do it again*. You’ve already proven it’s in you. It could be -since you hint at this-fueled by traumatic memory or feeling that’s surged for some reason. It might help to start by paying attention to what you *feel* when you imagine returning your practice -does it make you anxious? Trauma survivors often live with old protective responses like “don’t let your guard down or relax for an instant” that helped when there was no room or luxury to feel peace or practice self-care. Addressing that old fear could help you get back on track.
Dr Craig Malkin, thank you for your response! I have started a daily record of my alcohol, supplement and food intake, I'll make another column now for Pranayama and feelings, to explore that. I think you're on to something about not letting my guard down, I will try and get to the bottom of this. Thank you again!
Dr Craig, thank you for you're expert videos and the insightful book about narcissism. As a survivor, I'll always be grateful for your life saving work 🙏
Having healed from this condition, I would add religious faith and practice. This is even more effective than your suggestions due to the extra benefits on top of the relaxation. Such as moral growth, proper and historical influences on family, society, and culture. Primary is the experience of metaphysics and the time tested results of holiness. Praying the Holy rosary daily has immense impact and connection to providence
Painting keeps you in an alert relaxation state and provides an opportunity to connect unconscious feelings to a postive external activity which has a concrete outcome that increases self-esteem.
Thank you so much! I love the simplicity of the idea of nurturing inner calm as a way to overcome ptsd and anxiety. Also, your kind voice and spirit of generosity actually helped me to relax. I wonder if anyone has ever done a study on the impacts of exposure to kindness, generosity, and hope on ptsd and anxiety.
Thank you so much for your research and videos. This information is gold for someone like me who has been trying to navigate the symptoms of CPTSD and narcissist abuse from a parent. 🙏🙌👼🏻
What really helped me was to go through some traumatic experiences with a therapist which it is something I have to do often to control my emotional responses to life stressors. Exercise helps my self-esteem and confidence and lower my tendency to be depressed.
Thank you for your vivid description. If the nervous system acts like a pendulum - swinging from sympathetic to parasympathetic state and back - may a depression or a trauma issue reveal itself like a magnet on the sympathetic pole? I found my own method to check my mental state. I simply try to relax, and observe what is going on in the inside. (Assumption … the better one can relax, the better ones mental state. )
Wow, I have been looking for ways to overcome my PTSD, this makes perfect sense, thank you Dr Malkin, I am going to put your words into practice, thank you.
Order pills without any prescription directly on our website dispensary help a friend relief all pains, depression, PTSD, cancer, Diabetes, panic attacks, opioids...👇👇👇 www.chemistsolutions.com/
Oh, my God... yes! I get it. You made me have a breakthrough moment. I need to be relaxed when I am at rest instead of constantly vaguely alarmed. When I'm vaguely alarmed the child in me needs soothing, and the child in me turns to self sabotaging by way of destructive behaviours like bingeing. My child finds solace where it was back then. I finally get it! Thank you! I hope all the good you put out in the world comes right back to you :) I'm also going to have a read of your book.
Chewing gum activates the parasympathetic response. So does humming. So does noticing patterns in your field of vision- if you are freaking out look around you and notice everything that is the color yellow or green or whatever. Or read a label on an item near the grocery store checkout line. 💜
I have CPTSD and GAD....everything you mentioned about meditation (and journaling) really do help. I noticed I haven’t meditated in awhile and my anxiety has gone up.
I had a stroke and I keep forgetting thinking my face is drooping and the symptoms and I know stress/anxiety cause another stroke so this helps a lot thank you.
Dr. Malkin, what about people who live on the edge of anger all the time, who can't control themselves by reacting angrily to the slightest things? It seems to me that practicing what you've mentioned in this video would be helpful for many difficult behavioral issues. Thank you for all the videos you've brought to us, as well as your book, 'Rethinking Narcissism'... very helpful to so many of us dealing with the challenges of narcissistic personalities in our lives. Looking forward to #2 video on PTSD!
Consider calling it post traumatic stress RESPONSE, rather that “disorder” … though it surely is that also. Please consider doing a video on the phenom of living at a distance from one’s own preferences and feelings! Thanks for your work! I benefit a lot from your videos and esssys.
Craig, here are some tips I use on overcoming heat: Drink a glass of cold water fairly quickly, THEN wash head and hands in cold water, THEN put feet in cold water and leave there for at least 15 min. This is what I do to massively cool my body quickly and keep it there for longer in heat conditons. Don't dry my face and have fan pointed at face and body. Do these if I DON'T want to spend energy just having a cold shower and if I don't have air conditioning or want to spend money on it. I say this as a thank you for your videos as I'm going through PTSD from work and you helped (helping me). :)
When someone touches me i feel so powerless and i freeze up.... I am not able to be normal..always hyperalert and i feel scared and guilty to tell my friends and family and close people to not touch me unless i initiate it..coz i dont know bt i am really not able to handle it.. I wasnt sexually abused nothing like that...bt you know my boundaries were violated for sure though ,i felt so traumatized... Noone gets me..people think i am acting crazy for telling them not to touch..i feel hyperaroused and sooo powerless..and am soo scared to set boundaries and fear of abandonment extremely..i feel so unsafeee even for small conflicts or rejection in relationship which is insignificant for others ..i feel like i cant be loved and i dont deserve love and i feel like i am a bad persom that doesnt deserve to be loved by people😞😞 am totally not able to have relationship ,i am so scared they will violate my boundaries.. .is it due to the trauma that happened am behavung in such a way? Should i consult a counsellor?
Definitely look for a therapist if your insurance/financial situation allows for it. Take your time until u find someone u can open up to. Best wishes. I understand how you feel in many ways.
Thank you so much. My therapist has showed me several of the techniques that you have mentioned. But I didn't really understand how or why they work. We didn't have a lot of time to discuss that due to the cost of therapy.
Beautifully explained. Thank you so much for taking the time and effort to make this video. I will be implementing many of the techniques you discussed (I run and weight lift as of currently, but will begin to incorporate yoga and meditation into my daily routine as well- defs need more mindfulness techniques). Thank you kindly! Education and insight as you have so eloquently provided make a major difference/impact on the road to healing and recovery. Thank you! 🙏🏽
This talk is really interesting. I am blessed not to be a sufferer of PTSD. However, having read and heard about the suffering of people who do have to contend with those symptoms, particularly a relative of mine, I have come to reinterpret the novel called Watership Down. This novel is supposedly, on the surface, about a bunch of talking bunny rabbits making their way across the countryside of England to find a new home. That is how I viewed the story when I first read it at the age of twelve years. However, upon learning a little biographical information about the author of the novel, it turns out that he had been a soldier who had been on multiple tours of duty during WWII, as both a regular enlisted soldier and as some sort of intelligence soldier. After the war, to cope with his PTSD, he used to go for long walks in the English countryside where he saw wild rabbits in their habitat. And he made up the stories in Watership Down to tell his children. But what comes clear on learning that the author had been a soldier, is that the "bunny rabbits" in the story, Hazel-rah and Fiver and Bigwig, aren't really bunnies. They're soldiers. They're soldiers in a company that is trying to cross enemy territory. And the state of hyper-awareness that soldiers and other trauma survivors call PTSD once the trauma situation is past and gone, that state of hyper-alertness to one's environment, and to every crackle of a leaf or twig, as a possible sign of an approaching enemy, is the Normal Daily Life of real rabbits who have to survive in the wild, and is the state of normal daily life that keeps soldiers alive when they're out in the field in a war. Any rabbit that wasn't in a state of hyper-alertness all the time would soon be eaten. And any soldier who wasn't hyper-alert to the presence of an approaching enemy would likely not survive the war. So Richard Adams, the author of Watership Down, during his walks in the English countryside after he was demobilized from his WWII unit, must have recognized in the rabbits he saw sitting up and sniffing the air for danger, thumping with their feet to warn their friends to flee, or ignoring him as a harmless pedestrian, the same state of alertness that he had known all too well during his life as a soldier in WWII. And he would have realized that although his PTSD was an abnormal state of mind for him to be in during a quiet walk in the English peaceful landscape, now that the war was over, nevertheless, that exact same state of mind that gets labeled PTSD after the danger is long past, had, in the thick of things, been a normal state for a soldier, and even had been useful in keeping him alive at the time, just as the rabbits' hyper-alertness is useful in keeping rabbits alive in a world filled with a thousand predators. I was just reminded again of the novel, Watership Down, by your talk. Some years ago, when I took a month's vacation alone, hiking and reading on Vancouver Island (I didn't have PTSD but I was recently bereaved at the time), I had a landlord of an Air B and B place I rented for that month long ago, who was clearly a former elite soldier now home for decades, yet still suffering from PTSD. It was the elephant in the room in dealing with him, his PTSD. It was clear from his mannerism and from his care in working out and in the arrangement of the floorplan and furniture of his house. The floor plan was analogous to a rabbit's den in some ways, because there were always two exits available in every room, and clear lines of sight from all four rooms, so that almost every space inside the house and much of the yard could be visualized from every other space in the house, via mirrors and windows if one left the doors open and the shades up. It was almost as if the house had been designed and built by the fictional Jason Bourne's real life half brother.... I never mentioned any of this overtly. But when I mentioned the novel Watership Down to my Vancouver Island landlord, and how I had recently reread it and had realized that the bunnies weren't really rabbits at all, but were soldiers going on patrol in enemy territory, he gave me a big smile, and seemed to warm up to me in a way he wouldn't otherwise have done , had I been just another dumb renter of his Air B and B house. (He helped me buy a car at auction there to use while vacationing on the island, a car that was both cheap and reliable. That experience of working together with this guy to pick the best, cheapest car in the lot was an unexpected fun highlight of the trip...but it's a different story for another time. Oh, and no romance, though he was single and handsome. I have far too much sense to get mixed up with a not-completely-well person while on vacation to overcome my own recent loss of a family member to a terminal illness.)
PTSR! 😊…Thats your point right!? Use all of these tricks to shift the response to triggered emotion. A response is in our power- a disorder - not so much so. To your list, I’d add all forms of playful ART! Thank you!!
Thank you. Very good advice, I am actually taking notes and not just listening. I can attest to exercise being a great release of frustration. The combination of being tired (good nights sleep) and that you accomplished something and the release of feel good hormones all help, theres also a sense of self control or agency when you realise you can improve on the laps you have swam. or miles ran , or weights that you lift. Even its in small increments, It can be quite centering and give you some focus , clarity and something to aim for when it feels like other things are out of your control or unpredictable. I'm reading up on meditation and mindfullness. Sitting still takes patience... with myself . Still working on that. Looking forward to the next upload.
being an only child of a narcissist and an autist, I had developed a complex ptsd. I have been meditating (and working out) for over 32 years. But nothing helped me more to tap into the parasympathic system then the Wim Hof method (breathing, cold exposure), I recommend it to anyone with high stress levels
Thank you so much for making this video! I learned that the state of calm is cumulative too, I didn’t know that before, I only thought that stress was cumulative.. Vital knowledge! 🙏🏼🙏🏼
Thank you so much, Dr. Mallon. This is vital information and it is so helpful. I also found my faith and doing Tai Chi were both helpful in helping me relax and cope. I must see your next video.
I always struggle when I know my stress is too high and I'm having a hard time managing my symptoms I try to pull away alone and calm down but the kids climb on me and argue and yell and it makes it worse because it raises my stress. I'm trying really hard to make this work as a single mom but the kids go everywhere with me and I need techniques that are kid proof lol I'm sure the stress is affecting them because they act out when I'm struggling too, we all need some relaxation.
I’m a single mum too, widowed. Honestly I’ve let my standards relax a lot with things like screen time as letting my son watch TV is the only way I get peace - I go to my bedroom and do meditation or journalling or yoga.
What if you body is pulling you into a low energy state where you sleep all day? I this a ineffective way to engage the PS nervous system, or does the eosacapism make facing daily stresses harder? I know it's not healthy because I've been doing it and getting depressed and not escaping the anxiety when I start to get my body active again (although it comes in cycles by itself). Bipolar maybe?
Do you have a magic wand, please? I do a lot to keep my nervous system in a parasympathetic state, but the moment I get triggered in dealing with toxic abusive people, my bodies stress response goes into overdrive, - 💣💥 - back to square one. I'm exhausted from my dealings with dysfunctional abusive people.
Use your imagination . Take 10-20 minutes to Imagine you are in a world where there is no such thing as pain. Nothing or no one exists that can hurt you , you are magic and cannot experience pain or damage. Its better if you come up with scenarios for yourself but you can start with "I fall off bridges...and automatically spread my wings and fly. " then you move to another scenario "I never fall off things, no one in this universe does" Imagine in all the ways you can, a safe universe. Imagine living in one. Magic will happen to your mind, I swear :)
Hey what u say makes SSO much sense. However my trauma is still not over.when I try to relax my abusers come at me with hate untill I scream and cry again.they just won't leave me alone. They want me to xperience trauma and total fear and just to know that I am overcome by these people and they will make me suffer no matter what I do.i left my home and moved to another country asked for help to everyone I cud think of but nobody can help.i know this is really not the place for this but it tells ok to talk about it here so..I'm sooooooo scared..here they come..they have remote access to all my i.t. so they reading this...😱😩😨
Commenting all the way from Scotland! My trauma may be considered trivial but I experienced a toxic workplace and suffer trauma from it in my new work. I think people are out to get me my mind thinks in fight or flight mode constantly. I get anxiety going to work and then ruminate going home it's such a good professional job I'm just can't cope! I meditate every day had hypnotherapy, now pyschotherapy taken l-theanine and herbal tincture all of which cannot stop my negative loop! Please help I have days that are positive but when I get trauma triggers I spiral!! I work 6 days on 3 days off so for those 6 days it's hell!!
I have been telling all my friends they need you in their life !! Do you offer Skype sessions I’m not sure watching Frasier is enough of s treatment plan!
Dr Craig Malkin Thank you so much for your videos. I am someone who has grown up with what I suspect are 2 narcissistic parents. I have done a lot of self work but still very much struggle with anxiety and high arousal mixed with depressive episodes. What I have heard termed ‘emotional flashbacks’ I have got your book, and am in the process of reading it currently. I know you must be very busy but I am wondering if there is any way to get in contact with you to ask a couple further questions ? I have tried seeking an expert in my area but have been unable to find anyone helpful so far. Either way thank you so much for your book and videos ❤️
It is really tough when the triggers hit strong. I am hurting really bad right now and hate it when there are people who know that still abuse me. Those kind of persons are not human.
DEPRESSION... The thing that got me through major depression was low intensity, steady state cardio. I just walked on a treadmill on a slight incline for 30 minutes 3-4 times per week. It took about 6 weeks to start noticing anything but by weeks 12-16 it totally and completely lifted me out of any depression. The thing is also I havent really done any cardio since I got better (about 1 year) and im still fully not depressed anymore. Exercise is amazing and so cheap. A gym membership in the UK is £25 or so per month. Its really not that hard either especially when you start to see progress.
PTSD... I still have slight PTSD symptoms (sleep and hyper arousal problems mainly) but what helped me the most was talking truthfully and completely honestly about things with my mum. I think the fact that I exercised definitely helped also. Oh and walks in nature. Real wilderness kind of nature.
See the problems you face as a problem of biology, not a problem of spirituality or philosophy and how you should "love yourself" and blah blah blah. If you see it as a problem of the nervous system and neurotransmitters, you can actually systematically start tackling it. Our brains and bodies evolved to be in hunter gatherer type tribes who exercise every day, experience new things every day, are part of a team and who take care of each other. We dont live in the same way our ancestors lived anymore and I think in many ways (mental health being a huge one) that is a bad thing.
Hope someone sees this and it helps.
I have PTSD and my son suffers from depression. I am trying to teach him that too. I have a little rebounder and hop on that a couple of minutes several times a day. It is amazing how it can make anxiety disappear.
So basically if I go outside and run my PTSD will go away?
@@dm5129 Reduce negative thoughts with a simple practice to feel better. . Your breath is directly related to your mind [brain] causing negative thoughts-anxiety. For a relaxed life sit on a chair, back straight, eyes closed, be as still as possible and observe the sensations of your incoming--outgoing breath at the entrance of the nostrils for around 5-10-15 minutes or more. Don’t fight your thoughts. Slowly the mind will relax. No deep breathing needed. Day or night before sleep sit or lie down and observe your breath. Like me, make this a lifetime daily habit to have a good life. Avoid constipation as it affects the mind. Best wishes Shyaaam Sir. -Counsellor.
@@JohnDoe-wz6xi Trans form from within. Reduce negative thoughts with a simple practice to feel better. . Your breath is directly related to your mind [brain] causing negative thoughts-anxiety. For a relaxed life sit on a chair, back straight, eyes closed, be as still as possible and observe the sensations of your incoming--outgoing breath at the entrance of the nostrils for around 5-10-15 minutes or more. Don’t fight your thoughts. Slowly the mind will relax. No deep breathing needed. Day or night before sleep sit or lie down and observe your breath. Like me, make this a lifetime daily habit to have a good life. Avoid constipation as it affects the mind. Best wishes Shyaaam Sir. -Counsellor.
Thank you, I need this to help reverse trauma from narcissistic abuse
tulum0617 you’re welcome. Thank you for taking the time to let me know it helped :-)
Narcissistic abuse is the worst. I did not even know what narcissistic meant until PTSD forced me to explore that. It was present in all years of my life, especially during an abusive marriage that I had no idea was abusive. And during a childhood during which I also did not understand that I was abused.
It culminated in me contracting PTSD after being stalked by an obsessive person.
I have never fully understood how people abused me during the years and to this day PTSD causes terrible triggers during which I only understand that it has something to do with my past but not fully understanding why a certain person or certain behavior causes such awful triggers.
The fallout of the stalking was what intensified my PTSD, that much I know, so many people who literally enjoyed to abuse me, the victim, afterwards.
But it did lead to a better understanding of which people I would have to steer away from anyways in order to save my own sanity and to escape abuse before it even happens.
Omg this is me too... the exact same. Emotional abuse by narc parents
I'm in the same boat.
@@naturecreep8811 same here...
From the bottom of my heart; thank you, thank you, thank you so much. As a clinical psychologist you know the extent of how much anxiety/PTSD can disrupt ones life. The information you gave me has finally allowed me to start the healing process and take back my life. Much appreciated, sir.
Remember people; you can't be relaxed and anxious at the same time! :D
This is explanation is simple, helpful and the kindness in your tone of voice encourages hope! My adrenals and I are grateful to you!
Kathryn Scarano what an incredibly sweet message of gratitude. I’m so glad you find my work so healing. It means so much to hear that :-)
Wow. I wish I had seen this a few years ago thank you. My ptsd symptoms were through the roof. There were days I was so frozen I couldn’t move. I started yoga nidra every day two years ago. It has been a life changer. I also started somatic experiencing therapy 6 months ago, and that’s really helping feel safe in my body. Thanks!
Dr. Malkin,
I spent thousands and thousands in different types of therapy that did not work.....but they insisted that they would be able to help or even cure me. They all asked me to go through and remember childhood, and said they would eventually also have me walk through the recent event that I believed caused me to have PTSD ( I was diagnosed) as a component to the therapy. 6 months into it I had a nervous breakdown and dropped all forms of therapy. Then I went to visit my mother in Canada who asked me to try and find peace, and helped me focus on yoga, meditation, and self-healing exercises. This helped everything....then I came upon your video and it explains why "finding my happy place" has been the only effective treatment. As she said, "You can't fight the darkness, but if you bring in the light - darkness cannot persist." I will pursue each of the methods you mentioned and keep watching your videos as a part of finding the light to fill my life with. Thank you.
The wise words of your mom brought tears to my eyes. How precious. Much love.
My favourite psychologist, that makes me feel peaceful and safe 🙂 Thank God for him! x
Aww thanks :-)
I had to have open heart surgery out of the blue and it’s been a struggle to get over that. I was 43. I now have to take meds daily and that’s making it hard to get over the trauma of everything that happened and how fast it all went.
I’ve got more out of listening to you than all the therapists . Thank you. I have a severe startl refex
I used to suffer from panic attacks on highways. I came out of it all through self work and meditation. There is a particular book, called “Living Fearlessly”, by Paramahansa Yogananda, that helped me truly and that was the initial turning point. In that book the fear is described as static. That was a powerful perception turn for me (I was pregnant and in deep burnout when I read it) and that was the beginning of the U turn.
Your voice is very soothing. I sometimes use your. Ideas to fall asleep. But I also listen to your videos when I’m awake.
My ptsd was given to me by abuse I received from sergeants, after the army I could trust no one in military like positions, local police were okay, but the higher echelons like fed, etc, since it was army who gave me abuse, I could not trust ever, and it makes me feel like I have to have a weapon on me for protection, because those people shattered my trust in the military. Trust no one! If you've been harrassed by gov, you know what it feels like to be bullied, and the gov does this now through ICE, DHS, and other organizations. It's Nazi Germany in replay.
Yep cps aswell
It is a Nazi replay because those kind of people are just as callous. The Nazi times are not over, people like that are in our midst.
My abuse happened on a military base as well, even though I was not enlisted in the Services. I saw first hand how not being helped is the regular decision of service members when bad things happen.
I trust people but then they trigger me terribly with actions and it is horrible to know that there are so many monsters who I think are normal people.
I always explore things, feelings, privately despite the fact that I am often being forced by others to make certain decisions. But I need time to personally explore happenings and feelings by myself before I could even ever make a decision.
Often times I just re explore things that happened with other people and it is unfortunate that despite me being so private and not reaching out to certain people while just exploring what I think makes others being so intrusive.
People that try to force me to make decisions in a hurry are my pet peeve.
Healing is needed definitely from races that experience traumatic past in history and the things we experienced on personal levels we've learned to jus live with but affects our lives
@@DanteEdgeworth Thats not true, ptsd can be from witnessed experiences
Very helpful . I was waiting outside a store for it to quit raining a car lost control and ran me over pushing me back into the store . I remember very little of the accident but lost 4 toes on the sceen of the accident and numerous other injuries . I worked hard on physical recovery for a year . Now the PTSD has kicked in . Going to look for the second video
What helped me was meditation, psych therapy, educating myself on why I was suffering as I was (reading as well as therapy) and above all, to really understand the notion that EMOTION ALWAYS FOLLOWS FOCUS. To know that is extremely empowering. ;) Once again, thank you so much, Dr. Craig. Keep fighting the good fight! lol :)
Where do I begin to thank you for your book and videos; this video is one I have been needing for a while. Thank you again for all you've provided with your research and empathetic approach. Very much appreciated, and with gratitude!
This is fantastic! Thanks so much for sharing this info with us =). It's good to see a new video on here from you.
I can personally vouch for yoga, meditation, and mindfulness practices as I have been writing about and applying this over the last several years, and one of my favorite long-term clients (bosses? lol) just recently released a 30-day program to the public that has already gone through clinical trials for things like stress management and even addiction recovery (the My Mindful Moments Program, in association with Executive Coaching University). I had the honor of being the narrator and offering input for a lot of the content, including a VR body scan meditation, which is one aspect of how I try to help myself heal (working on these types of projects, either with others or independently).
I think the most beautiful thing about mindfulness practice is that you don't have to constantly meditate (although 20 minutes a day is perfect lol); it becomes a habit. So in each moment, especially when emotionally triggered, you have the ability to pause, feel the trigger, recognize it as such, and respond appropriately (and practice doing so). This doesn't mean perfection; it just means practice and doing what you can to be your best self.
Thanks again! I am still working my way through some life challenges (it's past the breakdown point and at the beginning of the rebuild point, if that makes sense), but am loving your book so far! I appreciate you taking the time to share your thoughts on your channel as well, as this is where I am most often now that I'm producing more content myself, so I am very much looking forward to the second part. I hope you have a wonderful weekend!
Jen
Thank you so much for you're wonderful comment! I hope to be able to do more videos, though I do just sort of squeeze them in.
Sounds like you've done amazingly with your mindfulness work. So powerful--and I appreciate you're sharing your success with it here.
So glad you're loving Rethinking Narcissism!
Thank you for the insights and tools to help move toward a better life. I am the oldest daughter (2nd sibling) in a family of 9 children. Narcissism has taken a huge toll on my family. My father was distressed that, at the time of his death, it had torn my family apart. I am, regrettably, moving toward "no contact" after many years of trying to sustain my beloved father's vision for our family. (He passed away a few years ago, isolated by my mother who increased his distress during his final months and days and isolated him from his children.) I have mourned the fact of "leaving", as I believe we are "here" to love and support each other. That vision has, repeatedly, proven unattainable. It is a tremendous and very sad waste of life and some of the most meaningful opportunities it offers - for love, laughter, acceptance and compassion.
Deirdre Christenberry so incredibly sad. My heart breaks when I hear stories like this-all too familiar to me. I’m glad you’ve found your healing path. That’s huge, brave, and really all that matters. Thank you for your comment. I wish you continued healing.
#courage (which you already have in spades).
You are fantastic. Best explanation I have ever heard on PTSD, and it inspires a natural call to action through education. I am going to watch all your videos. Thanks.
I love the tone of your voice. I realize that I have all three of those things that you mentioned. Chronic hyperarousal, hyper vigilance and the last one. The sympathetic n.s. is on overdrive from 60 years of intense trauma. I feel hopeless but I’m going to try your next video.
What about the freeze response? As in dissociation, hypo arousal, depression,fatigue ? These can also be symptoms. All connected to the vagus nerve. PMR is quite outdated and in some clients can increase anxiety,blood pressure and stress response. Also, meditation is very difficult,if not impossible when in a fight or flight state. Moving the body and getting rid of excess and adrenaline is often best and easier in my opinion. personally I find yoga and walking most helpful, long out breaths to slow heart rate,rhythm, music and sensory experiencing. We need to connect with our body first and help it to calm down before engaging the rational mind. Stephen Porges, Peter Levine and Bessel van der Kolk are worth noting
Everyone has their favorites. They're all capable of activating a parasympathetic response. Use what works. Paradoxical anxiety has been noted with all these techniques, not just PMR, which is still quite effective for some but not all people (which is why its nice we have a range to the same pathways). As I state in the video, none of these is likely to pull anyone out of an intense fight or flight state.
Also, just to clarify for the public, progressive muscle relaxation has decades of journal articles devoted to its efficacy, some as recent as 2015. It's still used in controlled studies.
You're correct that freeze is part of the fight or flight response.
Love the works of Levine at al. Especially Bessel's The Body Keeps Score.
All these techniques involve mindfulness and or somatic focus while relaxing. The best meditations (breathing) involve focus on the body. That's the one I teach.
Susan Pollock. Heavy exercise has really helped me so I just want to say I agree about getting in touch with the body.
Thank you Dr. Malkin. There's so much junk going on in my life I can't even think. As a survivor of childhood sexual abuse and physical, emotional and verbal abuse, I have so much anxiety I can barely function. Now there's a lot of awful things going on in my family centered around drug addiction and the lack of care for my granndchilren by their mother, my daughter. Anyway it would take a while to tell you all garbage. But I have inflammatory bowel disease so all the stress keeps me sick and in pain. Looking for some help to manage my stress. I have been diagnosed with PTSD, Anxiety, depression and dissociative disorder.
Wondering if you were helped as similar to my life but have leukemia.
Rea, I'm 57 and still get flashbacks (PTSD). I have an autoimmune disease which I'm sure the root of it is childhood sexual abuse. I don't have any answers... I tried to tell but my family wouldn't listen.
This reply is late but I will say that if you can break with your family, and begin therapy when you’re ready, eventually you’ll begin to heal. It may take years, but it will be worth it.
Thank you. I found out about echoism , and at last I can understand what I suffer from.
Thank you so much Dr. I'm crying my heart out
Thank you Craig, Thanks so very VERY much!.
Please Do keep posting your insights and help here online.
Your of more help than you may ever truely know.
Complex P.T.S.D was & remains a VERY 'hard pill' to accept personally, and then to explain on to others, be they Personal friends and/or medical persons alike.
Its so little understood and grossly under diagnosed...... Years of Isolation, confusion & private torment are not at all uncommon before any help is offered or accessible to we that develop it.
Mine has been so buried and confused from years of other issues, possibly decades of happenings and complexities....., then dismissed and buried beneath years of self-medication and harm.
So very many acquaintance Ive had, those alive still all those so sorely lost over time, could they have still survived with the insight such as you are offering here.?
Again, Thank you, and please, keep your insights up and coming.
Gratefully Yours,
Marcus S Collinge,
Dunedin,
New Zealand.
I’ve experienced so much stress over my life that I am now always hot. I live in Canada and I don’t head my home even when it’s -20 Celsius. I have had this for the past 3-4 years or so and on top of being hot all the time , the slightest tiniest event gives me a momentary hot flash. It could be when I’m driving and I have to slam on the breaks, you name it. I have trained by brain to react this way and this is now permanent. After having multiple panicked attacks, hospitalized because my entire body shut down, my entire body was violently shaking and I even up in the ER. After having multiple panic arrache events, I basically woke up one day and was always hot and thought it was told that it was chronic fatigue with it wasn’t. I work out very intensely 3-4 week with HIIT training followed by a sauna. I don’t know how to train my brain to reverse this problem. I am 45 and im in very good health. At a subconscious level, my entire nervous system is on constant alert and I would greatly appreciate some guidance. Thank you.
You sound much like me but I'm disabled & cannot exercise. Had to stop taking anxiety meds when had to begin chemo for leukemia. I cannot train my mind to relax so no hope.
Noushka Bear that’s crazy, same with me?! I actually just got my bloodwork done to check for hyperthyroidism but my thyroid came back normal. My doctor noticed how sweaty I was even though it was cool in the office and I too have been experiencing this for the last three years. I am 43, and he thought it to be odd I would get so heated like that everyday.
Hello I had that problem too he called it internal heat my Siddha doctor prescribed me abhayanga (self massage with oil ) once a week . I felt cool and my mind is calm and clear .
Daily meditation twice a day 15 to 20 min sessions and daily yoga. Works wonders but you have to give it time..don't give up.
Malkin, very well done in so many ways. First, you seem to recognize that people who have PTSD or other anxiety issues need to hear a calming, soothing voice, which you've employed here. Excellent way to begin.
The information is accurate, entirely relevants, broken down into language and an explanation that most lay people can readily understand: another win. Then you're going to follow this up with a part 2.
Including yoga was a nice touch, as yoga has tremendous healing effects on the body when it is practiced calmly and reasonably (and not the trendy yoga where your listen to hard rock or push your body beyond it's current limits).
There's much to appreciate and respect about this video. Well executed! (and it definitely needs to get into the hands of as many people as possible)
EDIT: Also, you better enjoy that heat while you can. Boston has a summer that comes and goes in the blink of an eye. : )
Thank you Dr. Malkin I am going to share this to my Facebook group of almost 5000 survivors- your generosity in sharing knowledge is wonderful.
So glad you found it helpful, Tracy! Let me know how it goes :-) you may find FB filters out the video so very few people see it. I've discovered sharing a screen shot of the video plus the link gets around the throttling algorithm. FB really doesn't seem to like youtube direct shares.
Dr. Craig Malkin - it worked fine - maybe in groups it works better. Facebook actually sent some staff to my meetup to see how a live group works vs a Facebook group. So maybe they are trying to cater to the support world
Thanks so much! Looking forward to the second part!
You're so welcome!
I have CPTSD and these videos are the most concise and helpful I’ve found. Really appreciate you putting these videos up and making help easily accessible. 🙏🏻
Thank you for this clear and kind explanation of why relaxation exercises and techniques are so helpful and important.
Thank you
You cannot be relaxed and anxious at the same time 💜🙏🏽✨
I really appreciate the real concrete advice I can try to put into use and that it doesn't involve lessening my stress I'm subjected to because with my circumstances I can't, I just have to learn to manage where I am. I've definitely been having trouble with the stress stacking and feeling all of my symptoms are getting on top of me and it's so frustrating being aware is not enough. Thanks for making this so simple, I'll try it out 😊
Sarah, Reduce negative thoughts with a simple practice to feel better. . Your breath is directly related to your mind [brain] causing negative thoughts-anxiety. For a relaxed life sit on a chair, back straight, eyes closed, be as still as possible and observe the sensations of your incoming--outgoing breath at the entrance of the nostrils for around 5-10-15 minutes or more. Don’t fight your thoughts. Slowly the mind will relax. No deep breathing needed. Day or night before sleep sit or lie down and observe your breath. Like me, make this a lifetime daily habit to have a good life. Avoid constipation as it affects the mind. Best wishes Shyaaam Sir. -Counsellor.
Short answer: CBT, relaxation exercises/ meditation/mindfulness, and exercise, regularly practiced.
DBT>CBT
Stress and trauma are BOTH cumulative. Exposure therapy sucks for me. I lived it all enough. I don't need to do it again.
I'm working diligently to learn and master Meditation.
My trauma symptoms are so bad now, that I'm locked inside my little world, desperately trying to avoid the pain of triggered symptoms. The fear alone is dramatic.
Exposure doesn't work for high anxiety conditions because it causes the same emotional response your brain is trying to forget. It makes absolutely no sense. The same goes for CBT, EFT, meditation, relaxation, etc...none of them can create non-anxious neural pathways. This is not my opinion, it's neurological and psychophysiological science.
Dr Craig Malkin, the timing of your video is strangely perfect. The past few days I've been thinking so much about how practising Nadi Sodhan (alternate nostril breathing) has helped me in the past with my alcohol addiction. It was a long time ago, about 15 years ago, when I was VERY disciplined with the Pranayama practise. It made me stop drinking alcohol. But for some reason, and I can't remember anymore, I stopped the daily breathing exercises, and fast forward about 15 years, I'm averaging 55 Standard drinks per week. (a bottle of port most days) My doctor is horrified and people are mystified that I can drink so much and still look 10 years younger than I am. (Must be my Transylvanian Vampire ancestry)
I can't watch TV, gave my TV away, I do not, I cannot look at anything to do with animal abuse on the Internet, I'm sure childhood traumas have a lot to do with it.
But the question I have been asking myself over the past few days is this: How to will yourself to do the daily practise again, in order to soothe your parasympathetic nervous system? I know it worked for me in the past, I stopped drinking.
Right now I struggle with the motivational factor: If you know what is going to make you feel better, but you don't want to do it, what the heck is going on? Maybe my post will inspire you to make another video, because honestly, I'm at the end, my intellect just can't solve this problem, and the booze might get the upper hand and win. It's a puzzle that I can't solve.
Sissi I’m so sorry to hear about the slip back to drinking you’ve found yourself in. But given that you’ve been on track to recovery, we know *you can do it again*. You’ve already proven it’s in you. It could be -since you hint at this-fueled by traumatic memory or feeling that’s surged for some reason.
It might help to start by paying attention to what you *feel* when you imagine returning your practice -does it make you anxious?
Trauma survivors often live with old protective responses like “don’t let your guard down or relax for an instant” that helped when there was no room or luxury to feel peace or practice self-care. Addressing that old fear could help you get back on track.
Dr Craig Malkin, thank you for your response! I have started a daily record of my alcohol, supplement and food intake, I'll make another column now for Pranayama and feelings, to explore that. I think you're on to something about not letting my guard down, I will try and get to the bottom of this. Thank you again!
Sissi you’re welcome!
Thank you very much, I am in a really severe ptsd trauma state at the moment in result of my abusive family
I just noticed there is the subtitle option, thanks!. Its easier to understand your message now❤
Trauma survivor. Hoping this helps me
Dr Craig, thank you for you're expert videos and the insightful book about narcissism. As a survivor, I'll always be grateful for your life saving work 🙏
Thank you Dr. Malkin !
I am a victim of domestic violence, & a survivor of a assassination attempt !
This information was really helpful !!
Omg
Thanks! I was robbed at gunpoint and then soon after sustained a horrible injury that ended up in Post Concussion Syndrome. Thanks for the help
Thank you .
Spent years in expensive therapy
Have learnt more from you so thanks so much for your generously sharing.
Truly
Kind
This explains PTSD and ways to help recovery really well. Would you ever write a book on PTSD recovery?
Having healed from this condition, I would add religious faith and practice. This is even more effective than your suggestions due to the extra benefits on top of the relaxation. Such as moral growth, proper and historical influences on family, society, and culture. Primary is the experience of metaphysics and the time tested results of holiness. Praying the Holy rosary daily has immense impact and connection to providence
Painting keeps you in an alert relaxation state and provides an opportunity to connect unconscious feelings to a postive external activity which has a concrete outcome that increases self-esteem.
Thank You! Greetings from Poland
Hello! and you're welcome :-)
Thank you so much! I love the simplicity of the idea of nurturing inner calm as a way to overcome ptsd and anxiety. Also, your kind voice and spirit of generosity actually helped me to relax. I wonder if anyone has ever done a study on the impacts of exposure to kindness, generosity, and hope on ptsd and anxiety.
Thank you so much for your research and videos. This information is gold for someone like me who has been trying to navigate the symptoms of CPTSD and narcissist abuse from a parent. 🙏🙌👼🏻
What really helped me was to go through some traumatic experiences with a therapist which it is something I have to do often to control my emotional responses to life stressors. Exercise helps my self-esteem and confidence and lower my tendency to be depressed.
Thank you for your vivid description.
If the nervous system acts like a pendulum - swinging from sympathetic to parasympathetic state and back - may a depression or a trauma issue reveal itself like a magnet on the sympathetic pole?
I found my own method to check my mental state. I simply try to relax, and observe what is going on in the inside. (Assumption … the better one can relax, the better ones mental state. )
Wow, I have been looking for ways to overcome my PTSD, this makes perfect sense, thank you Dr Malkin, I am going to put your words into practice, thank you.
Order pills without any prescription directly on our website dispensary help a friend relief all pains, depression, PTSD, cancer, Diabetes, panic attacks, opioids...👇👇👇
www.chemistsolutions.com/
Oh, my God... yes! I get it. You made me have a breakthrough moment. I need to be relaxed when I am at rest instead of constantly vaguely alarmed. When I'm vaguely alarmed the child in me needs soothing, and the child in me turns to self sabotaging by way of destructive behaviours like bingeing. My child finds solace where it was back then. I finally get it!
Thank you! I hope all the good you put out in the world comes right back to you :)
I'm also going to have a read of your book.
Chewing gum activates the parasympathetic response. So does humming. So does noticing patterns in your field of vision- if you are freaking out look around you and notice everything that is the color yellow or green or whatever. Or read a label on an item near the grocery store checkout line. 💜
Thank you!
I have CPTSD and GAD....everything you mentioned about meditation (and journaling) really do help. I noticed I haven’t meditated in awhile and my anxiety has gone up.
Thank you so much. Keep the information coming
I had a stroke and I keep forgetting thinking my face is drooping and the symptoms and I know stress/anxiety cause another stroke so this helps a lot thank you.
This defines me so well… thank you sir 🙏
Thank you for helping me understand
You're welcome. I'm so glad you found it helpful!
Dr. Malkin, what about people who live on the edge of anger all the time, who can't control themselves by reacting angrily to the slightest things? It seems to me that practicing what you've mentioned in this video would be helpful for many difficult behavioral issues. Thank you for all the videos you've brought to us, as well as your book, 'Rethinking Narcissism'... very helpful to so many of us dealing with the challenges of narcissistic personalities in our lives. Looking forward to #2 video on PTSD!
When I hear the narcs name my body goes into a panic attack and my who body shakes. I hate it.
Is this still happening now?
thank you this is very helpful
Consider calling it post traumatic stress RESPONSE, rather that “disorder” … though it surely is that also.
Please consider doing a video on the phenom of living at a distance from one’s own preferences and feelings!
Thanks for your work! I benefit a lot from your videos and esssys.
Love this video. Thanks!
You're welcome!
Ironic how anxiety inducing the intro music is
Thank you. I really want to make this kind of practice a part of my life. I need it!
Thanks a lot doc! I have went through a lot! I needed this
Thank you so much, Dr. Malkin!! Liked and subscribed. Will be back to watch your other videos.
Craig, here are some tips I use on overcoming heat: Drink a glass of cold water fairly quickly, THEN wash head and hands in cold water, THEN put feet in cold water and leave there for at least 15 min. This is what I do to massively cool my body quickly and keep it there for longer in heat conditons. Don't dry my face and have fan pointed at face and body. Do these if I DON'T want to spend energy just having a cold shower and if I don't have air conditioning or want to spend money on it. I say this as a thank you for your videos as I'm going through PTSD from work and you helped (helping me). :)
When someone touches me i feel so powerless and i freeze up.... I am not able to be normal..always hyperalert and i feel scared and guilty to tell my friends and family and close people to not touch me unless i initiate it..coz i dont know bt i am really not able to handle it.. I wasnt sexually abused nothing like that...bt you know my boundaries were violated for sure though ,i felt so traumatized... Noone gets me..people think i am acting crazy for telling them not to touch..i feel hyperaroused and sooo powerless..and am soo scared to set boundaries and fear of abandonment extremely..i feel so unsafeee even for small conflicts or rejection in relationship which is insignificant for others ..i feel like i cant be loved and i dont deserve love and i feel like i am a bad persom that doesnt deserve to be loved by people😞😞 am totally not able to have relationship ,i am so scared they will violate my boundaries.. .is it due to the trauma that happened am behavung in such a way? Should i consult a counsellor?
Definitely look for a therapist if your insurance/financial situation allows for it. Take your time until u find someone u can open up to. Best wishes. I understand how you feel in many ways.
Thank you so much. My therapist has showed me several of the techniques that you have mentioned. But I didn't really understand how or why they work. We didn't have a lot of time to discuss that due to the cost of therapy.
Which therapist are you consulting?
Beautifully explained. Thank you so much for taking the time and effort to make this video. I will be implementing many of the techniques you discussed (I run and weight lift as of currently, but will begin to incorporate yoga and meditation into my daily routine as well- defs need more mindfulness techniques). Thank you kindly!
Education and insight as you have so eloquently provided make a major difference/impact on the road to healing and recovery. Thank you! 🙏🏽
Jyoti It’s my pleasure. I’m so glad you found it helpful and thank you for letting me know!
Thank you . I'll try to keep this in mind next time I have flashbacks
This talk is really interesting. I am blessed not to be a sufferer of PTSD. However, having read and heard about the suffering of people who do have to contend with those symptoms, particularly a relative of mine, I have come to reinterpret the novel called Watership Down. This novel is supposedly, on the surface, about a bunch of talking bunny rabbits making their way across the countryside of England to find a new home. That is how I viewed the story when I first read it at the age of twelve years.
However, upon learning a little biographical information about the author of the novel, it turns out that he had been a soldier who had been on multiple tours of duty during WWII, as both a regular enlisted soldier and as some sort of intelligence soldier. After the war, to cope with his PTSD, he used to go for long walks in the English countryside where he saw wild rabbits in their habitat. And he made up the stories in Watership Down to tell his children. But what comes clear on learning that the author had been a soldier, is that the "bunny rabbits" in the story, Hazel-rah and Fiver and Bigwig, aren't really bunnies. They're soldiers. They're soldiers in a company that is trying to cross enemy territory. And the state of hyper-awareness that soldiers and other trauma survivors call PTSD once the trauma situation is past and gone, that state of hyper-alertness to one's environment, and to every crackle of a leaf or twig, as a possible sign of an approaching enemy, is the Normal Daily Life of real rabbits who have to survive in the wild, and is the state of normal daily life that keeps soldiers alive when they're out in the field in a war. Any rabbit that wasn't in a state of hyper-alertness all the time would soon be eaten. And any soldier who wasn't hyper-alert to the presence of an approaching enemy would likely not survive the war.
So Richard Adams, the author of Watership Down, during his walks in the English countryside after he was demobilized from his WWII unit, must have recognized in the rabbits he saw sitting up and sniffing the air for danger, thumping with their feet to warn their friends to flee, or ignoring him as a harmless pedestrian, the same state of alertness that he had known all too well during his life as a soldier in WWII. And he would have realized that although his PTSD was an abnormal state of mind for him to be in during a quiet walk in the English peaceful landscape, now that the war was over, nevertheless, that exact same state of mind that gets labeled PTSD after the danger is long past, had, in the thick of things, been a normal state for a soldier, and even had been useful in keeping him alive at the time, just as the rabbits' hyper-alertness is useful in keeping rabbits alive in a world filled with a thousand predators.
I was just reminded again of the novel, Watership Down, by your talk. Some years ago, when I took a month's vacation alone, hiking and reading on Vancouver Island (I didn't have PTSD but I was recently bereaved at the time), I had a landlord of an Air B and B place I rented for that month long ago, who was clearly a former elite soldier now home for decades, yet still suffering from PTSD. It was the elephant in the room in dealing with him, his PTSD. It was clear from his mannerism and from his care in working out and in the arrangement of the floorplan and furniture of his house. The floor plan was analogous to a rabbit's den in some ways, because there were always two exits available in every room, and clear lines of sight from all four rooms, so that almost every space inside the house and much of the yard could be visualized from every other space in the house, via mirrors and windows if one left the doors open and the shades up. It was almost as if the house had been designed and built by the fictional Jason Bourne's real life half brother....
I never mentioned any of this overtly. But when I mentioned the novel Watership Down to my Vancouver Island landlord, and how I had recently reread it and had realized that the bunnies weren't really rabbits at all, but were soldiers going on patrol in enemy territory, he gave me a big smile, and seemed to warm up to me in a way he wouldn't otherwise have done , had I been just another dumb renter of his Air B and B house. (He helped me buy a car at auction there to use while vacationing on the island, a car that was both cheap and reliable. That experience of working together with this guy to pick the best, cheapest car in the lot was an unexpected fun highlight of the trip...but it's a different story for another time. Oh, and no romance, though he was single and handsome. I have far too much sense to get mixed up with a not-completely-well person while on vacation to overcome my own recent loss of a family member to a terminal illness.)
Thank you.
You're welcome!
Glad to have you back!
Very helpful learning how to cope with PTSD. Lived with it for years however, only recently diagnosed. Thanks for posting
I took so much Ashwaghanda and St. John’s Wort that I couldn’t feel my face!!!🤣
PTSR! 😊…Thats your point right!? Use all of these tricks to shift the response to triggered emotion. A response is in our power- a disorder - not so much so.
To your list, I’d add all forms of playful ART!
Thank you!!
Thank you.
Very good advice, I am actually taking notes and not just listening.
I can attest to exercise being a great release of frustration. The combination of being tired (good nights sleep) and that you accomplished something and the release of feel good hormones all help, theres also a sense of self control or agency when you realise you can improve on the laps you have swam. or miles ran , or weights that you lift. Even its in small increments, It can be quite centering and give you some focus , clarity and something to aim for when it feels like other things are out of your control or unpredictable.
I'm reading up on meditation and mindfullness. Sitting still takes patience... with myself . Still working on that.
Looking forward to the next upload.
So glad you're finding it so helpful-- and keep up the great work!
being an only child of a narcissist and an autist, I had developed a complex ptsd. I have been meditating (and working out) for over 32 years. But nothing helped me more to tap into the parasympathic system then the Wim Hof method (breathing, cold exposure), I recommend it to anyone with high stress levels
Thank you so much for making this video! I learned that the state of calm is cumulative too, I didn’t know that before, I only thought that stress was cumulative.. Vital knowledge! 🙏🏼🙏🏼
This is mindfulness, the ancient Buddhist contemplative tradition 💕🙏
I don't react well to meditation or deep breathing but I enjoy yoga and fitness.
Thank you for this.
Oh goodness love this but can’t find second video
Thanks for this scentific help.
Omg this is super valuable information thank you so much
Thank you so much, Dr. Mallon. This is vital information and it is so helpful. I also found my faith and doing Tai Chi were both helpful in helping me relax and cope. I must see your next video.
I always struggle when I know my stress is too high and I'm having a hard time managing my symptoms I try to pull away alone and calm down but the kids climb on me and argue and yell and it makes it worse because it raises my stress. I'm trying really hard to make this work as a single mom but the kids go everywhere with me and I need techniques that are kid proof lol I'm sure the stress is affecting them because they act out when I'm struggling too, we all need some relaxation.
Could chant OM. Might help. Maybe the kids can join in...
Use if useful. Kids are terrifically stressful.
I’m a single mum too, widowed. Honestly I’ve let my standards relax a lot with things like screen time as letting my son watch TV is the only way I get peace - I go to my bedroom and do meditation or journalling or yoga.
This is brilliant information and much needed. Thank you for this explanation it was very helpful.
Thank you for the video. You have a soothing voice.
Simple and excellent advice. Thank you for sharing.
What if you body is pulling you into a low energy state where you sleep all day? I this a ineffective way to engage the PS nervous system, or does the eosacapism make facing daily stresses harder? I know it's not healthy because I've been doing it and getting depressed and not escaping the anxiety when I start to get my body active again (although it comes in cycles by itself). Bipolar maybe?
Do you have a magic wand, please?
I do a lot to keep my nervous system in a parasympathetic state, but the moment I get triggered in dealing with toxic abusive people, my bodies stress response goes into overdrive, - 💣💥 - back to square one.
I'm exhausted from my dealings with dysfunctional abusive people.
same here.💜
Use your imagination . Take 10-20 minutes to Imagine you are in a world where there is no such thing as pain. Nothing or no one exists that can hurt you , you are magic and cannot experience pain or damage. Its better if you come up with scenarios for yourself but you can start with "I fall off bridges...and automatically spread my wings and fly. " then you move to another scenario "I never fall off things, no one in this universe does" Imagine in all the ways you can, a safe universe. Imagine living in one. Magic will happen to your mind, I swear :)
@@satsumamoon 💌Thank you!
Hey what u say makes SSO much sense. However my trauma is still not over.when I try to relax my abusers come at me with hate untill I scream and cry again.they just won't leave me alone. They want me to xperience trauma and total fear and just to know that I am overcome by these people and they will make me suffer no matter what I do.i left my home and moved to another country asked for help to everyone I cud think of but nobody can help.i know this is really not the place for this but it tells ok to talk about it here so..I'm sooooooo scared..here they come..they have remote access to all my i.t. so they reading this...😱😩😨
Okay, this is really simple and useful. Thank you.
Commenting all the way from Scotland! My trauma may be considered trivial but I experienced a toxic workplace and suffer trauma from it in my new work. I think people are out to get me my mind thinks in fight or flight mode constantly. I get anxiety going to work and then ruminate going home it's such a good professional job I'm just can't cope! I meditate every day had hypnotherapy, now pyschotherapy taken l-theanine and herbal tincture all of which cannot stop my negative loop! Please help I have days that are positive but when I get trauma triggers I spiral!! I work 6 days on 3 days off so for those 6 days it's hell!!
Thank you so much, very needed
I have been telling all my friends they need you in their life !! Do you offer Skype sessions I’m not sure watching Frasier is enough of s treatment plan!
Dr Craig Malkin
Thank you so much for your videos. I am someone who has grown up with what I suspect are 2 narcissistic parents. I have done a lot of self work but still very much struggle with anxiety and high arousal mixed with depressive episodes. What I have heard termed ‘emotional flashbacks’
I have got your book, and am in the process of reading it currently. I know you must be very busy but I am wondering if there is any way to get in contact with you to ask a couple further questions ?
I have tried seeking an expert in my area but have been unable to find anyone helpful so far.
Either way thank you so much for your book and videos ❤️
It is really tough when the triggers hit strong. I am hurting really bad right now and hate it when there are people who know that still abuse me. Those kind of persons are not human.