actually one guy once got killed in a Counter-Strike knife fight, then he spent 7 months tracking who killed him and when he found the guy, he stabbed him, luckily the guy survived
That game where his son died of coca in is called bitlife, I died in kindergarten after a fellow student randomly threw a grenade at me in class, it's just an American life simulator at this rate
@@polkamatic123 It was a single word and the word was "unfunny"... not much of a joke lol. Also apparently not realizing that somethings a joke makes you a furry now
The highest honor in video games is beating a kid so hard that they accuse you of being a cheater, calm down and add you as a friend, plays with you and learns from you, and then has grown so much from your skill that he beats you. I see them as my children and I miss the BO2 boys 😥
Jasper: *Drinking Coffee* I haven't slept in 6 months Metal Jasper: How have you not fainted yet? Jasper: I drink 3 cups of coffee a day, and idk why garnet is mad at me Edit (Comment is from 3 weeks ago): Idk why people find this funny
"Why do woman live longer than men?" Me and the boys at 7 years old: The oldest one by a couple months: "okay so we're jumping off the roof and whoever jumps higher when they land on the trampoline wins" The other 4: "aight lets do this"
what are you talking about you drama-queen ?, ive only paid once in that game to unlock everything and it stays unlocked once you have became a bitizen
@@l0kaltpsykf4ll34 thats the case only if you bought it when it promised to give access to all future updates. that has been removed a long while ago and now you have to buy everything
I got killed by a bully by him using a literal machine gun at me while im at school. Theres also a time i almost got killed by a bully using a bow and arrow at me.
"This was more painful than the time I got stabbed 23 times." I'm not gonna say it. I'm not gonna say it. I'm not gonna say it. I'm not gonna say it. *2 3 S T A B W O U N D S*
3:25 The way Jack delivers the “You spelled ‘Eat’ wrong. Made my not only shoot Mountain Dew out of my nostrils but I laughed so hard I wet my favorite boxers… Now I have to smell like pee until laundry day! 😢 Edit: Some people are asking why I don’t change Underpants and I thought it was weird you have more than one pair…
@Aamukta Duggaraju nope kiddo if you are too young to understand math and go to university in order to get a stable job you are not allowed to have a sexuality
0:08 Still though the x men typically fight other mutants or supernatural beings so unless he's fighting magneto or a human threat he wouldn't really be useful.
Fun fact: the replica of the Ark they spent millions on is actually neither waterproof nor capable of floating. It's also one of the biggest financial failures of any commercial tourist attraction.
this man is a talented youtuber, i hope you one day achieve your biggest goal. mad respect you amount of people you influence is mad bro keep going love the content!!!!!!
Physicians in the middle ages did taste the urine of knights and nobles in order to inform the cooks of what kinds of food to prepare. For instance, if the urine was sweet, they have high blood sugar and the cooks should not prepare anything sweet for that day. They didn't know that diabetes was a thing, but they knew that sweet pee meant too much sugar and it needed to be balanced out by consuming less.
That's the third one I counted where Jack straight up FORGOT to read the cursed comment. At least he actually SHOWED the comment that time, unlike the Anne Frank one. He's a good guy but it's hard not to get frustrated when he repeatedly does that shit.
For everyone’s safety the ark will not be needed in the bible it says that god will not flood the world again that is why the rainbow is seen to remind u of hi promise UNLESS WE FREAKING MELT THE ICE CAPS
1:22 pretty ironic given that in Christianity and Judaism two of the biggest religions that believe in angels it says that you don’t go to heaven if you commit suicide
@@iwantsexseemyvideo6868 Spamming random emojis doesn’t make people go “AWOOGA *Jaw drops and eye pops out,a chain drops down and as he pulls on it ears spout out smoke*”
17:50 « they demolished a few of those buildings.... » They did a bit more then demolish them but close enough, time to knock them down now to make it accurate.
Fun fact, only a few hundred or so years ago to test for diabetes a doctor would drink a small bit of the patients urine to test if they had diabetes. This would apparently work because it would taste sweet.
Don't mess with crocs. Once they get their motorcycle engine going and start galloping, you better run for the hills
Kim jong-un: cuban crocs are the best crocs, they are comrades
Their... W H A T ?!
"Hill senpai help me the cwocodile is gonna huwt me!"
@@iwantsexseemyvideo6868 bot
¿Cuáles son sus pensamientos sobre Che Guevara?
actually one guy once got killed in a Counter-Strike knife fight, then he spent 7 months tracking who killed him and when he found the guy, he stabbed him, luckily the guy survived
@@iwantsexseemyvideo6250 yo these bots are disgusting
That’s what I call toxicity, literally attempting to kill someone who killed you in a game
@@FalkyRocket2222 I know right, they are really bad in freshs comment section
i was really confused for a second lol
Hope they live stream round three, they should also use a bomb to make it true to the game.
"don't sexualize kitchen appliances"
Hank: * glances at blender * sorry
TURNS ON BLENDER WHILE IN
Hank from finding dory?
That was the garbage disposal 🤨
*stop*
Hank are you sure your not the one putting the milk in the blender?
@@sandsunderthetable.6625 I... Don't think it was water....
Jack at 6:06:
" don't sexualize kitchen appliances, please."
Me:
"boy, Wait till you learn about Rule 34."
"TIME TO FUCK A BLENDER!"
The snack that smiles back
*Children!*
R/cursedcomments
@@chs9999
Snap that child's back
*Goldfish*
@@EnergySurge09 milk
A lunch club watcher I see
From experience, they actually scream, cry and have an upside down smile. I always tell them to smile but if they don't, they wont be able to.
Humans: Crunch dead leaves because the sound is satisfying
Leaves in another dimension: Crunch dead human bones because the sound is satisfying
UHHHHH
r/cursedcomments
@Plank Scale bro?
You spelled eat wrong
Who tf just crunches leaves unless if they're eating salad
*I envy how good Jack is at impressions/accents*
That game where his son died of coca in is called bitlife, I died in kindergarten after a fellow student randomly threw a grenade at me in class, it's just an American life simulator at this rate
Same
But it was my sister, i was 3 and i was able to dodge the grenade
@@bencenagy5459 Hol up-
can confirm
When ever jack says that “he’s the snack that smiles back” I can only imagine a talking Goldfish that sounds like him
Engineer Gamer
Dorime
Engineer gaming
engineer gaming
snap that child’s back, goldfish
Fun fact: the highest honor of gaming is being called a hacker after beating a kid hard
Indeed
Yes
yes it is
You beat kids?
@Trey Good Fun fact: No one asked
All of the emkay narrators have calming enough voices for me to fall asleep to.
Legit
17:18
And this is why you don’t separate siblings in foster care
Fun fact: There is a person named Kim Jong-un telling everyone *"Cuban Crocs* *are the best crocs.*
*They're comrades"*
Unfunny
@@polkamatic123 Its not supposed to be funny, it's a fact
@@AAAAAA-613 take a joke furry
@@polkamatic123 It was a single word and the word was "unfunny"... not much of a joke lol. Also apparently not realizing that somethings a joke makes you a furry now
ngl that comment is just top of this comment
Bible: Jesus can turn water into Wine
Me: *Jesus is invited to my party.*
why dont you pay respects and go to jesus' party?
If he is in africa,it's useless
Jesus must be the life of the party
If jesus was real, id want him at my party, i actually like wine
I have a case of water summon him and les get lit
"we have a fucking army"
yeah... Suicide Squad
🤧damn
*Wheezing*
nah, we have a _fucking_ army
@@skytanjunhanmontfortss3924 can I join?
"Girl: are you gonna hit a gir-"
EmKay: *KATAMARI DAMACY*
but like what's the actual song tho...
Katamari on the Rocks
This is why i like Jack. cause instead of just saying "no!" in disgust, he sometimes adds to the joke.
there’s jack and there’s robin
i had to turn off dark mode to see your name all i saw was “MyNameIs” i didn’t see the dark part
@kenneth andries yes exactly
MostWxntedComp lol
@WANT SÈХ - Rita 25 y.o ! OPEN MY C A N A L !!! SHUT
Are we not gonna talk about “Ohana means CATCH THESE HANDS”
E
@Mol-Dog you are a god EA GaMeS
@Mol-Dog you are aged EA GaMeS
EA game r
The almighty EA GaMeS
G
A
M
E
The noah’s ark is actually a theme park, i’ve been inside. Its really neat and educational.
With dinosaurs
@@cosmobane6995 there are dinos inside the ark. They’re in cages
8:40 called bitlife
The highest honor in video games is beating a kid so hard that they accuse you of being a cheater, calm down and add you as a friend, plays with you and learns from you, and then has grown so much from your skill that he beats you. I see them as my children and I miss the BO2 boys 😥
Are you okay, I heard something happens to you at the beginning
Plot twist: he actually just installed the same cheat engine you were using
4:58 Jack’s laughing like he’s being held at gunpoint.
He sounds more like jimmy falon.
Wait there's no difference
I can assure you he is
Go pico
“The highest honor in gaming is beating a kid”
-Emkay, Nov 8 2020
...off.
Jasper: *Drinking Coffee* I haven't slept in 6 months
Metal Jasper: How have you not fainted yet?
Jasper: I drink 3 cups of coffee a day, and idk why garnet is mad at me
Edit (Comment is from 3 weeks ago): Idk why people find this funny
Lol
(BTW in the first 6 weeks Jasper screwed Amethyst's pillow)
@@angelic_autumngachaclubgac3483 Guess Jasper has a lot of practice screwing stuff with feathers
@@GuessImSylvale Well no sh-t
@@angelic_autumngachaclubgac3483 r/cursedcomments
7:58 they missed out on the chance to say "Kink's awakening"
how about a Motel Mario
"Why do woman live longer than men?"
Me and the boys at 7 years old:
The oldest one by a couple months: "okay so we're jumping off the roof and whoever jumps higher when they land on the trampoline wins"
The other 4: "aight lets do this"
"People who hate fortnite are more annoying than people who play fortnite"
And that's a fact
@@Manel-dq2kb no, toxic 9 year olds are really annoying and waste money on that game
@@amountaingoat1527 not all fortnite players are toxic 9 year olds but fortnite haters go out of their way antagonize anyone who enjoys the game.
@@Manel-dq2kb I don't
@@phoenixandco.8033 good for you
4:31 Anne Frank lofi hiphop beats you can relax/study to
8:30 that game used to be se good until recently where everything is now locked behind a paywall
what are you talking about you drama-queen ?, ive only paid once in that game to unlock everything and it stays unlocked once you have became a bitizen
@@l0kaltpsykf4ll34 you are right
@@l0kaltpsykf4ll34 thats the case only if you bought it when it promised to give access to all future updates. that has been removed a long while ago and now you have to buy everything
The “sims” game is BitLife. It’s strange. A 6 year old can die from texting and driving. 🚶♂️
Amen 🙏🏻
The game is strange in the first place
I got killed by a bully by him using a literal machine gun at me while im at school. Theres also a time i almost got killed by a bully using a bow and arrow at me.
If you think about it, the kid could have just been a passenger 👀
I once died in bitlife from telling my husband to get a pp enlargement surgery and he shot me with a machine gun
Here's a fact: Cuban crocs are the best crocs. They're comrades
And Kim jong un isn't
Avery the cuban american: yes
Yes, a croc is thicc because the children are slow
Wait you aren’t dead didn’t you-
69 likes
Calling it "The Piston Cup" in CARS is like having a trophy called "The Intestine cup".
4:09 -Welp, time to whip out the Luigi Board.
"This was more painful than the time I got stabbed 23 times."
I'm not gonna say it.
I'm not gonna say it.
I'm not gonna say it.
I'm not gonna say it.
*2 3 S T A B W O U N D S*
A MAN OF CULTURE I SEE
28*
@@LomasneyAaron of course
@@LomasneyAaron I should've known. :-(
@@LomasneyAaron Can't tell if you're trying to be ironic but it doesn't matter **r/inhales**
R/WOOOSH
6:34 ... Sniper no Sniping. Sniper no Sniping. Sniper no... *Bam*
Damn, almost made it.
Bro Ooo look at the replies
Professionals have standards
The "I hate Spotify adds" one made me spit my juice out.
5:06 EVERYTIME I SEE THIS I BURST OUT LAUGHING XDDDDD
Mom: You're a boy, do more boy things
Me: ok
Me: Gets a boyfriend
Mom: Now listen here you little
your a boy do more boy things
*does femboy things*
YO THIS HAPPENED FOR ME BUT FOR A GIRL
LMAO
@@el-de4yw I like your profile picture 👌👌😁😁
@@uwuowo2281 bruh not just 10 yo UwU boy saying that
Person: "Blow my mind"
Me: *pulls a gun*
Person: "hold up!"
You're just fulfilling their wishes
No, you need a grenade launcher to blow someone's mind.
**Slams book on table**
23 STAB WOUNDS!!
7:34
3:25 The way Jack delivers the “You spelled ‘Eat’ wrong. Made my not only shoot Mountain Dew out of my nostrils but I laughed so hard I wet my favorite boxers… Now I have to smell like pee until laundry day! 😢 Edit: Some people are asking why I don’t change Underpants and I thought it was weird you have more than one pair…
8:33 it’s a game called BitLife and it is a life simulator that just randomly gives you scenarios
@Crystalyte milk
@@Milk-nk1gr milk
@@Aftenark milk
@@radiationstandard milk
@Crystalyte Actually, you can be a god in BitLife
Sex actually is a lot like maths.
You still don't get it.
Hahahahaja
no
@Aamukta Duggaraju nope kiddo if you are too young to understand math and go to university in order to get a stable job you are not allowed to have a sexuality
Jack: “Don’t sexualize the kitchen appliances, please, I use them daily!”
Me: Yeah, I bet you do...
Also Jack: 6:13
Toaster: you pick the darkness and I’ll explode in a bit
Propane Tank: "boom"
9:35 . . . T H I S I S D E F I N A T L Y N O T W E I R D . . . N O T A T A L L . . .
This makes me want to crack my spine like a glow stick
If you lived in Hiroshima at the right time, you might actually start to glow then
Or if I lived near Chernobyl, then I could 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 glow
Same here
Excuse me?
@@entropygacha982 mhm
Day 1: Robin should do bone hurting juice
May I say....
AGREED
I agree
@@iwantsexseemyvideo6250 please change your name.
@@vranivn agree
@@vranivn It’s a bot I bet.
It's funny how making jokes about having people in your basement and stuff like that is so common people could be serious without anyone knowing
0:08 Still though the x men typically fight other mutants or supernatural beings so unless he's fighting magneto or a human threat he wouldn't really be useful.
Mutants have blood
i've heard so many kids in my basement joke that it's no longer considered dark humor
i now only laugh at actual kids in my basement
I sadly had to put one down. It got sick and I had to shoot it in the heart. Poor thing. But at least it was free food for the others
@@trashmammal9203 can i have one? Mine died cause he got a fork into a soket
Holy sh*t is this a cult or something
@@lance8995 J O I N U S
@@microsoftwindows1717 you can have the disabled one
Human trafficking: **Exists**
Luigi: _invest_
Fun fact: the replica of the Ark they spent millions on is actually neither waterproof nor capable of floating. It's also one of the biggest financial failures of any commercial tourist attraction.
11:47 it is called bitlife jack.Edit: i blew myself up it in the army
2:53
"I Yearn The True Gender Equality" - The Big Three
Hell to the yeah
11:21 As a person from the Czech republic, I could never be more proud 🇨🇿
Same :D surprisingly im not living in the Czech Republic but in the Shrek Republic, kinda cool tho
How do I get my ethnicity estimate
@Justin Y. impersonator lol your 69 has become 70
@Hand Grabbing Fruits I was talking about his subs lol
Shrek can legally do the kazotsky kick
I have NO idea how people have a favorite EmKay narrator. They all are SO good! How do you pick only one?
"I have NO idea how people have a favorite EmKay narrator."
Robin. That's why.
On the glowing balls one you sounded like the teacher from ghost stories dubbed 😭😂
Great video btw-!
The one with married siblings isn't intentional so it's not Alabama. It's Pennsylvania
Nah
So yeehaw or naw
Really hit the nail on the head with that one
Sweet home Pennsylvania
r/takemyupvote
17:49 Perfect way to re-enact his father’s death, his dad was a great pilot
r/cursedcursedcomments
@WANT SÈХ - Rita 22 y.o !!! OPEN MY C A N A L !!! stop
@@iwantsexseemyvideo1512 stfu
"Who lives in a crackhouse and snorts ecstasy"
"My Grandpa Chris!"
this man is a talented youtuber, i hope you one day achieve your biggest goal. mad respect you amount of people you influence is mad bro keep going love the content!!!!!!
Physicians in the middle ages did taste the urine of knights and nobles in order to inform the cooks of what kinds of food to prepare.
For instance, if the urine was sweet, they have high blood sugar and the cooks should not prepare anything sweet for that day. They didn't know that diabetes was a thing, but they knew that sweet pee meant too much sugar and it needed to be balanced out by consuming less.
Wow
I might go test this lol
8:47 FUN FACT: dolphins are smarter than us; the only reason they aren`t a civilization is because there`s no fire in water.
Wait,what?
But theirs *lava : )*
1:17 we all know what comes next
0:24 jack is a snack got it
mhm
girl: you wouldn't hurt a girl would you
me: GENDER EQUALITYYY
Equal Rights Equal Fights!
69 likes
Okay why is this everyone's first thought, physically fighting each other?
@@Moon_Puff why not
@@Moon_Puff yeah why not
Don’t that dude mean: “Dora the Drug Importer”? Hmmmm
Milk the milk man
She started as an importer. now she doesn't import it, she puts it to good use.
@@kylecarpenter9437 🗿
D d d d d Dora the d d drug drug importa
dora the roblox exploiter
1:02
No, the highest honour in gaming is beating a kid so hard he shoots the s**t outta himself
The giggling and Pacman sounds are LIFE xD
17:08
god the scream on the background is killing me xd
Are... are we just going to ignore that the Kink one says “they said ruin not improve”...?
That's the third one I counted where Jack straight up FORGOT to read the cursed comment. At least he actually SHOWED the comment that time, unlike the Anne Frank one.
He's a good guy but it's hard not to get frustrated when he repeatedly does that shit.
jack you broke the 14 video streak of me watching emkay videos with robin narrating congratulation
That Hearing AIDS joke was 👌 *chefs kiss*
"I have kids in my basement does that count?"
Guy in farmers add: "that is something to behold"
I got a febreeze ad
We are Farmers! Bum-ba-dum da-dum da-dum!
Well, this is the earliest I'll ever be again.
Same
I fell asleep listening to my music playlist on loop, how did I end up here? Oh well, I'm subbed already!
"name this dog after the last thing you ate"
Toast. and it's absolutely correct.
For everyone’s safety the ark will not be needed in the bible it says that god will not flood the world again that is why the rainbow is seen to remind u of hi promise
UNLESS WE FREAKING MELT THE ICE CAPS
Well God did say HE wouldnt, he said nothing about us doing it
Bib
E
6:00 I'll take two at a time
We don't talk about the blender
12:37
I laughed way too hard at that
1:22 pretty ironic given that in Christianity and Judaism two of the biggest religions that believe in angels it says that you don’t go to heaven if you commit suicide
4:23 then they would marry each other on top of his coffin
Shut up you're not even pretty
Then they would have their honeymoon on top of his coffin
@@iwantsexseemyvideo6868 Spamming random emojis doesn’t make people go “AWOOGA *Jaw drops and eye pops out,a chain drops down and as he pulls on it ears spout out smoke*”
Rita rita
no one wants to meet ya
Rita rita
Your boyfriend's gonna cheat ya
1:48 C H O N K
2:15 who's gonna tell em
'the highest honour is beating a kid' ~jack 2023
17:50 « they demolished a few of those buildings.... »
They did a bit more then demolish them but close enough, time to knock them down now to make it accurate.
With a model Boeing 767-222 and a model Boeing 767-223ER plane!
6:16 imagine you yell "DING!" when you climax
🙂🔫
"nice collection, bro', that was so fast, that i laughed before i understood
11:38 I will never forget this statement. Thank you Jack 😂😂😂
I miss Damien
I believe (correct me if im wrong) you can find him in sad milks newest video
Same
Same
What happened to him? (I’ve watched since it was mostly Damien and still can’t figure out)
Same
0:46 that was actually a great voice for the captain. I'm impressed. Good work, Jack.
Petition to have all EmKay members play a game of some sorts together
"Over my dead body!"
Me: If I believed in hell, I'd be going for laughing at this.
13:40 in the clip he was watching an orange getting peeled representing p
WAIT A DAMN MINUTE
@@doritopng332 yep
@@doritopng332 that is part of the show
@@doritopng332 The Amazing World of Gumball was a wild show, and I loved watched the show.
Haven't watched but i can tell it will be good already
K
As Usual
Dorime
“You spelled eat wrong” I’m dead😂
The children were fast.
But my truck was faster.
Fun fact: Someone is making a fun fact about the people who comments didn't watch the video yet
Look out
Ay Engie spy sappin your dispenser!!
Fun fact, only a few hundred or so years ago to test for diabetes a doctor would drink a small bit of the patients urine to test if they had diabetes. This would apparently work because it would taste sweet.
Bugterrggr
It took me 5 long seconds to understand the joke at the start then I burst out laughing for 0.5 seconds
I love the little We Love Katamari jingle he did.