Elite Lies and Luxury Beliefs | Rob Henderson | EP 429
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- Опубліковано 10 тра 2024
- Dr. Jordan Peterson speaks with best-selling author, Air Force veteran, and psychologist Rob Henderson. They discuss his recent memoir “Troubled: A Memoir of Foster Care, Family and Social Class” and go through Rob’s tumultuous upbringing within the California foster care system, the lived and observed transformations of social status and class as he ascended to Yale and Cambridge, how his thoughts on family structure and “luxury beliefs” developed, and why bookstores won’t host him for his tour.
Rob Henderson grew up in foster homes in Los Angeles and in the rural town of Red Bluff, California. He enlisted in the U.S. Air Force at the age of seventeen. Following his enlistment, he attended Yale on the G.I. Bill and was subsequently awarded the Gates Cambridge Scholarship to study at the University of Cambridge, where he obtained a PhD in psychology in 2022. His writing has appeared in the Wall Street Journal and Quillette, among other outlets, and his Substack newsletter is sent each week to more than 50,000 subscribers.
This episode was recorded on February 25th, 2024
Dr. Peterson's extensive catalog is available now on DailyWire+: bit.ly/3KrWbS8
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- Chapters -
(0:00) Tour info 2024
(0:39) Coming up
(1:07) Intro
(3:19) Life since publishing “Troubled,” canceled by bookstores
(10:54) An outline of Rob’s memoir
(16:56) Realizing what he didn’t want to become
(19:16) Joining the military
(22:44) Criminality among men, the importance of role models
(26:34) How environment impacts academic success
(30:04) Responding to momentary incentives versus planning for the long-term
(33:48) The impact of scheduled chores and genuine responsibility
(39:41) Learning to read at age 7
(44:34) Instability and disorder: “The first response was to medicalize it”
(49:36) The military offers steep consequences, but also steep rewards
(54:07) The deterioration of working class families
(58:46) “Luxury Beliefs” and manic Marxism
(1:07:15) The positive feedback loop of weaponized marginalization
(1:10:58) The only form of victimization that elite students won’t disclose
(1:13:46) People will actively identify with a new sexuality, but run from their sexual history
(1:17:39) The rise of dark tetrad traits and their correlation with a victim mentality
(1:22:22) Reputation matters deeply to most people, don’t let yours be exploited
(1:25:20) Why psychopaths constantly need new victims
(1:26:40) Consequence-free dating, predatory sexuality, Cabaret, Pinocchio
(1:31:20) Why people support or oppose populism
(1:34:55) The tendency for those who rally on behalf of the poor to sacrifice them
(1:37:54) Education is not a substitute for a stable family
(1:43:54) The dark difference between wealth and status
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High school dropout here. Started listening to Dr. Peterson and turned my life around. I will now be going to Cambridge University self-funded.
:)
That's amazing!
@@JordanBPeterson So I'm 39 years old and when I was in my 20's I was very focused on partying and 'hooking up' pretty much as often as I could. I was moderately successful in that endeavor but mainly struck out a lot because I would say I had high standards in terms of the attractiveness of the females that I'd attempt to seduce. But when I was a waiter at a restaurant, I had a reputation for being a 'player' but for whatever reason that didn't seem to inhibit my success with females who I worked with and if anything, seemed to increase my "success" rate. I've since stopped partying and hooking up after turning to Christ and realizing that my nihilistic lifestyle and paradigm was ultimately empty and destructive and the cost was very high. I'm wondering if I'm a dark tetrad type and if so, how do I not be that? I will say that one thing that I think made females more inclined to hook up with me was the fact that I didn't lie about my intentions and I was very respectful and treated everyone that I interacted with with kindness and respect, whether or not we hooked up and before and after we hooked up (although I now see that it's not very kind to have meaningless sex and one night stands with multiple partners). My older brother is almost certainly a dark tetrad type and it has led to him now being basically clinically insane and utterly dysfunctional and unable to work or doing anything other than talk to himself and take a slough of prescription drugs that are supposed to help but only seem to exacerbate his symptoms. Anyway, is there a test or something I can take to see if I'm a dark tetrad type and what can I do to not be that if I am in fact one of those people? God bless and thank you for what you do, Dr. Peterson.
Watch out for the wokies. I don't know what Cambridge is like but I've just been to Oxford and, as pretty as it is, it's woke HQ and full of wankers.
Don't major in bullshit!
UA-cam, stop suppressing Jordan Paterson in the algorithm. This is a great interview. Saw it first on X. Rob is a great thinker.
There you go.. great job.
After your comment I'm sure UA-cam is now committed to restructuring their model according to your anecdotal observations.
I saw this today just a couple of hours ago as a pop up on my phone 🤷♀️ so maybe the algorithm listens?
@@mathieutyler8745 you are correct, Sir!
@@mathieutyler8745 I mean, honestly commenting does help push it out. Even if they have it set to deemphasize certain creators and topics enough engagement seems to force it out.
@@mathieutyler8745Are you being facetious, disingenuous or are you an idiot who is completely oblivious to the fact that UA-cam Facebook and Twitter have all been caught red-handed suppressing conservative creators?
Ignorance must be fucking bliss!
Success is not judged by what one has achieved in life, it's judged by the obstacles one has overcomed. All the best to Mr. Henderson !
Well said!!
Not really, nobody else cares about your personal problems. Congratulations on overcoming them, but all that really matters is results.
I let my sons go to live with their father (who was unemployed but committed to fatherhood) when they were 7 and 8. The hardest thing I ever did. One has graduated in criminology and the other is a musician. They both tell me having those years with their Dad was the reason they survived while many of their peers succumbed to crime, suicide or addiction.
WOW! That had to be excruciatingly painful for you. 🥵 No one can say that you are an oedipus mother!
You are the definition of a good mother: putting the good of her children over her own feelings of comfort and pleasantness. I hope you feel proud of yourself every time you look in the mirror.
With criminology and music they will probably still end up unemployed hahahah
God bless you
@@dubsnipezI would certainly not define being a policeman and a school teacher (the most likely outcomes of those lines of study).
I absolutely love this! I currently have 1 of my nieces living with me, 17, who has had a very rough upbringing so far. Her absent father has been in and out of jail since he was 13 and her mother is a single mother of 4 children, 3 different fathers. I took in my niece to give her an opportunity to change for the better. I'm purchasing Robs book tonight!
Credit to you for being the stability that your niece needs. All the best for both of your futures.
And if it feels right, give it to her to read.
Congrats on the book and all your achievements. As a single mother in her 40s, finally navigating academia after a life full of trauma, I can appreciate the struggle and your story. I have similar experiences and there is nothing more invalidating than trying to interact with profs and academics that do not understand what poverty looks like. It is not impossible to go from being extremely disadvantaged to achieving a PhD, but I feel the journey is so challenging. We often feel out of place when other people share about their families. While others complain about their weekend, I'm counting pennies for transportation and my less than 1000 calorie per day diet. In my case, I was always an overachiever and hyper independent, but that lack of support always dictated the trajectory of my choices. I'm proud of you and you are giving me hope ❤ I aspire to write a book about my life story too! Please keep sharing and shining! 🙏🏾
I always listen to Rob Henderson. In awe of his achievement.
To rise from his upbringing to where he is today is nothing short of phenomenal.
My heart breaks when Rob mentions that he would trade his academic achievements to have had a more stable childhood. The value of having two loving and committed parents is priceless. I hope that he finds (or now has) a community and family.
I feel that way too. Sometimes when we see what someone has accomplished we just don’t realize what they have suffered.
Agreed.
My grandfather was a B17 tail-gunner in ww2 and he passed away this week. RIP Corporal E.T. Flood and bless you for your service.
Sorry for your loss 😢 and Thank You for sharing 🙏
All the Best for You and his Family 💐 Gretti gs from Sweden🇸🇪🥰
Sorry for your loss. His service is greatly appreciated by all who benefit for it.
Sorry for your loss. The greatest generation is disappearing and soon they will be gone forever and their greatness with them.
Thank you for sharing. He must have been very proud of you also. God bless him and you.
❤
This is such a deep and powerful interview. I cried when he spoke of his teacher showing the picture in military uniform. He is a Miracle❤ The Foster Care System needs so much attention.
1:01:05 nah, the Foster Care "System" has more likely become a form of Political Patronage more than anything else because in most US States their Upper Level Management are likely Political Hacks of one stipe or another. They may have arisen through, or been employees of those Institutions for their whole working lives but when it gets to the point where the Ca$h has to change hands the Political Corruption will ALWAYS get it's flaws into it.
This is why these issues USED to be handled by Churches and true Charitable organizations. But unfortunately the "problem" has outgrown these institutions capability to solve.
Cannot deal simultaneously with helping the kids, AND undereducated and/or addicted parents, AND poverty and on and on.
But the Public Efforts always turn into "Vote Farms". Politicians, and their Egos, will NEVER be able to resist the temptation to buy votes with "someone else's money".
IMO, ONLY way to LIMIT it is term limits at all levels of Government before they can figure out how to game the system too catastrophically.
And I am not saying, necessarily, that they couldn't run again at a later date, or for higher office. But I don't think the US Founders EVER intended for there to ever be a "Career Politician"!
Probably more akin to something like Jury Duty or serving in the Military when they saw some problem that needed addressing and thought they could solve. Then LEAVING once that problem was addressed and doing things in the Real World instead of Clown World.
I think a break in Office is the minimum required to truly Re-Connect Politicos of whichever Party with the concerns of regular folks. Quick trip home on a donated jet with Political Contributes bending their ear the entire flight for a fund raising trip during an Election Cycle OBVIOUSLY is no longer enough to "Break the spell" of their particular delusions of grandeur.
As a boomer I had little to no guidance or mentorship regarding my future . As children of poor working class immigrants my dear parents were just trying to survive. I loved books and had self motivation to succeed. I watched those around me who were successful very carefully and tried to copy or emulate them. I saved for university by working full time and squirrelling away asap. No trips, no eating out or fancy clothes. Enjoyed a successful career through hard work, sacrifice. Now I go on nice trips!
No one asked, arrogant, self-centered, boomer.
"To educate a man in mind and not morals is to educate a menace to society " that quote kept popping up in my head while this conversation was playing out. We see the fruits of that now, government education is no substitute for family.
That does not follow. My public school, through the teaching of the Great Works, got us discussing what the right thing to do is and that we should be standing up for what is right (e.g., Antigone).
Perhaps you mean there is no substitute for religion. While my school did okay, they were no substitute for my family's participation in and discussion of religious and moral principles. Religious and moral education is primarily the family's responsibility and that responsibility does not seem to be shouldered as much or as well as it should be.
@@emilymiller1792 Your experience does not match mine. In my time in Illinois public schools we never studied any philosophy, or had any mention of right and wrong outside of the "you should always be tolerant of everything" doctrine. I would also point out that what we see from the post modern types in the public education sector now could be categorized as a religion, and one that is not helpful.
You are correct about the family and the abdication of responsibility. That was exactly my point. I learned those things from my father and grandfather especially. I have had the opposite experience than that of Mr. Henderson. Unbroken families father to son for six generations for sure, perhaps more. But that's not the norm, and our society has in large decided to give up the responsibility for raising children to the government. Dr. Peterson's and other's work at the ARC regarding the ideal family structure highlight this I think. Not that it's perfect, but it's the best we have.
@johnathonarnold9070
I agree with much of what you say. I am sorry your education was not better.
I am mostly responding to the reaction against public education as though we the people aren't part of it (it's 'the government'). Perhaps it is not what you intended, but in many other contexts, too many people do not see public education as their responsibility (beyond taxes, perhaps). Whether or not a person has kids in public school, how should the kids in a given community be educated to shoulder the responsibilities of adulthood (especially that of citizenship) and the continuation of the community/nation? The public schools are getting dragged down by lack of community-attention and agenda-driven interference by federal government politicians and corporatists. They want worker bees and people just barely well-educated enough to serve their interests.
Family, like you said, is instrumental in raising wise and strong people.
I agree, too, that too many people have abdicated their child-rearing responsibilities to the state. Is that the government's fault or people's? Might be a bit of both, but a moral and religious people will not lightly abandon that responsibility, which brings me back to the missing religious element.
@@emilymiller1792 excellent, yes! Independent people who can stand on their own feet and bear the burden of responsibility for themselves and family/community! I am a Christian and believe that is central to why my family has been what it is. Not perfect but it gave me a vision and foundation to build on.
@@johnathonarnold9070
Hooray! So glad we are on the same page! Now there are two of us to fight for public education that will educate independent-minded, free people! ;) E. pluribus unum for a government of the people, by the people, for the [free] people!
I am a Methodist. And, I, too, believe that my family and my beliefs have given me a vision and a pretty strong foundation to build on. Well said.
I am the youngest of 5, 3 brothers and 1 sister. My parents were drug addicts and my dad was also an alcoholic and still is to this day. All of my siblings followed down the same path as my parents and are still currently addicted to drugs and one of my brothers got put back into prison for another 8 years. I am the only one who graduated highschool and continued down a different path. I have now been in the dental field for 7 years and have created a family.
It’s been hard lately seeing all of them this way.
Kudos to you ❤ black sheep of the family. I also come from a broken home of abuse, neglect, alcoholism and eventually my dad taking his life.. I rebelled from my parents’ way of life by becoming a straight A student and graduating in the dental field as well! Maybe it’s the structure that attracted us to it. Anyways, good on you
@@jessicab5524 I am so sorry to hear that, I know how hard it can be.
No way you’re in the dental field too?! I think I ended up in the dental field because growing up my parents did not have teeth and my mom’s teeth were severely decayed, black and broken off to the gum line. I used to get made fun of for the way my parents looked. I was embarrassed that my parents didn’t have teeth. I don’t realize this until I was older, since I was younger I was obsessed with teeth and braces.
@@destinydavis7832 that is so interesting.. it makes sense why you have ended up in the dental field! I guess some people end up repeating what their childhood was, and some people rebel against it. Maybe something within us both intuitively was telling us to move upward. It’s pretty amazing when you think about the slim chances of not only surviving but also to stop the generational trauma. It’s great to hear your story and kind of mind blowing learning about the parallels!
@@jessicab5524 yes! The slim chance that we made it out. I’ve been thinking it a lot lately and I knew there were others out there who have experienced similar but had never crossed paths with anyone. It’s great to hear your story as well.
God was watching over us and had a different plan, for a reason I’m not quite sure of.
@@jessicab5524Congratulations to the both of you.
Dear Prof. Dr. Jordan Peterson, I'm writing to you again as a brother in Christ, I like to thank you for your speech before the congress. Thanks.
Dr Peterson I found your channel when you had around 100000 subscribers and you were fighting for free speech. I listened to your personality lecture and it blew me away I understood myself better from that moment. You do an amazing job in interviews because you answer carefully In a position of trying to find the absolute truth. I'm glad you have reached a much larger audience. Thank you sir for helping me through this very disturbing world I live in. I don't agree with everything you say but I believe you to real. Which is more important. I will speak the truth!
Rob's life is a great example of how institutions can utterly fail a young man (family, school, foster care) but also resurrect him (military). That being said, HE made the choice to eventually rise above his circumstances. He was obviously blessed with a great degree of inherent intelligence, but he changed his circumstances through his own agency. Young men need structure...
I agree. His story IMHO kind of shows the existence of free will. His is the kind of story that I've thought about over the years when people (UA-cam "celebrities") say that free will does not exist. He shouldn't be where he is, but he is there!
Great comment. 👍
@@0ucantstopme034
One of the issues with "free will" (whatever that means) is that as far as I can tell, it's a complete non-explanation for anything that ever happens.
Why did that person do that thing? Their free will. Why is their free will the way that it is such that it made them act in the way they did? Dunno.
Ultimately, Rob transcended his circumstances because of his genes which coded for higher intelligence and drive, which he didn't choose. I don't see free will here. I see random blind luck, same as everyone else. He's one of the luckier ones.
@@lostzephyr2191 I agree that it's not a matter of free will here. However, I do think that attributing his actions and choices to just genetics is not fair. The body consists of trillions of cells all interoperating in a variety of ways, which makes this system extremely complex. For us it is very easy to say that someone's behavior is just caused by their genes, because it makes it at least understandable why someone could do things that other people cannot. However, It might be possible that intelligence and drive might have a lot more to do with your environment than what a lot of people would expect. If you look at very famous mathematicians such are Richard Feynmann and Ramanujan than it becomes really apparent that these people spent a mad amount of hours into the subject. Regarding someone's drive, I think that habits and daily structure contribute a tremendous amount.
@@jackbraxton8922 He didn't choose his nature or nurture. Either you attribute it to his nurture, something he didn't choose, or his nature, something he didn't choose. Habits and daily structure are themselves the results of prior causes, and it doesn't matter how hard you work at being a mathematician or physicist if you have Down's Syndrome, you will never be Einstein.
This appeal to infinite complexity such that we can't make meaningful statements about the causes isn't compelling, unfortunately. To say that something is really complex and so complex that we can't say stuff about it doesn't really get us anywhere. Even if it was mostly genetic, that would mechanically be very complex as well, lots of genes interacting, but conceptually the causation is quite simple even if complicated in the details. It's either genes, environment, or a combination thereof, but you choose neither, and you don't choose environment when it matters most in life, which is very early on.
As somebody who began his college experience under chaotic circumstances while on the streets of LA, sleeping in a Dempsey dumpster at night, I had no imposed structure upon me. Yet, growing up in a single parent household, my father was an example of somebody who had a job. He’d wake up from his nap and leave home at 6pm every day. It stuck and From that, I learned to recognize structure when I saw it.
However, I was lucky enough to come across a counselor who taught me the importance of scheduling, with guidelines on how much study time I should set aside per unit of class.
Broken down to half hour increments I mapped out everything.; work, class, study and free time. After about a month of strictly adhering to the schedule I no longer needed the schedule because it became innate.
So, from a high school dropout living on the streets I would go on to graduate UCLA’s Engineering school, co-found a company with the father of the Internet while acting as lead hardware engineer for the first wireless hotspot. And I did so despite racist anti-white bureaucracy at every important stop of the way.
God bless this good man for telling the truth. My biologic father had drug problems. He has five kids by three different wives, but he was in and out of our lives depending on his drug problem at the time. Now he can't remember much and he can't speak so he's in a nursing home. This is my big chance to visit him, care for him and love him. It's late in the game, but now I feel like we're kind of close. God is always good. Amen.
Drunks and drugaddicts are mega fertile... how tragic
People like you give me hope for this utterly depressing world where it seems like everyone is chasing after the most degenerate of vices while shouting at the top of their lungs for the "freedom" to be degenerate.
It's so rare to see people who are actually kind and compassionate and values goodness. Thank you.
i can so relate to this guy. albeit he did much better than I. his statement of looking at the people he was hanging around and not wanting to end up in their place is exactly what took me out of the ditch. HS drop-out to independent, successful, healthy critical care nurse. i rarely give up on or judge a kid. this story speaks to me❤
Thank you for having this conversation. It’s a pleasure to listen to two grounded, intelligent men.
I love this conversation. I came from an unstable home and found that leaving home with my full time work, study and then a profession provided structure, discipline and a framework for me. though, a lack of role models has been my biggest issue- I see now after listening. This conversation helps me understand myself better … thank you Jordan and Rob for this fantastic contribution and study (and tips) for those who come from an unstable home, and the difficulties that come with it and how that might be addressed … very inspiring
Oh I am SO happy you talked to Rob Henderson again, dearest Dr. Peterson, it’s been so long and he has come so far as a writer since the last time you two talked. And you’ve got so much healthier too, thank God for it. I’m so proud of him to have his book out and doing well. I’m over head and ears in developmental editing on my second book manuscript today and seeing Rob with his book in hand gives me hope that, yes, books do get themselves written, whether they like it or not.
With Ruth Anne’s love ❤
How was Symbolic World Summit? Or whatever event you had mentioned in a previous post…I’ve a pretty keen memory, especially for well written and thoughtfully relevant posts to Dr. JBP.
Best of luck with your second manuscript!
GB☦️LHM
@@gregorywitcher5618 what a sweetheart you are, thank you! Isn’t it funny, I wasn’t able to attend Symbolic World Summit although I would like to have, but I was still blessed and spiritually refreshed by hearing about what a good weekend it was for everyone. Seeing Dr. Peterson so happily and hungrily drinking in the good teachings at the summit made me so happy. I love him like family and want the best for him. Yes, this manuscript has been the hardest thing I’ve ever tried to write- second books often are- but after five years of struggling the end is in SIGHT.
Thank you for your encouragement!
Ruth Anne
Mine was an Oxford PPE qualified teacher. Who was stern but fair. I looked up to him a lot. Smart but fair teacher. Believed in me more than me, when not many did. I’m improved immensely.❤
Jordan you make work bearable with your thought provoking podcasts, thanks for being you from UK.
Quite literally!!!
"They have the confidence of the competent without the competence."👍😂 Classic line.
Hey Dr. Peterson thank you so much for coming to Salt lake City! it was a pleasure to sit through your lecture it was so cool to see you Captivate the crowd as you did. I brought you a gift and was hoping to meet you but it was VIP only. thank you for everything. i dropped out after my mother died at 16 and this episode is a god sent . To the moon and back Dr peterson!!!!
I learned to read at 10 by reading Harry Potter. I would read one page over and over until I understood it, and by the end of the book I was able to read and understand faster and easier than ever before. When I was first starting I would get angry when I couldn’t understand, and that’s really what fueled me to keep reading.
Robs book Troubled is one of the best books I’ve ever read. It’s incredibly timely and helped me put language on something I struggled to articulate.
What a video title. “Luxury Beliefs” is such an apt description
What a brave, top G this young, wise man is!
I worked in the foster care system and saw terrible things: foster parents using foster children for cheap labor, a 13 yo being pressured into having an abortion and then being pressured to lose the "baby weight", kids being grounded to their rooms for weeks on end, etc. I very much disagree with the foster care system's goal to reunite children with their abusers. Hopefully, my experience is not the norm.
I will never forget that breakthrough moment, precisely when, as Jordan puts it, my eyes turned into ears. I was maybe 6, sitting there with a book in front of me, working mathematically at this puzzle of marks on paper in front of me, sounding it out, when suddenly something struck me like a bolt of lightning. The best way I can exprress it now is a feeling like "OH! This is WORDS! This is just...TALKING! LIke the way I talk in real life! I just have to know these words and just...SAY them!" It's an imperfect expression of the colossal, seismic revelation that was to me at such a young age, but suffice to say that from that exact moment on reading was NEVER a problem for me but a joy. The not very joyful part of it would be around the time I was in, say, 6th grade, when the teacher would have all us kids take turns reading from our story book out loud. I would sit there just writhing with excruciating, exasperated boredom as some of my classmates would stumblingly mouth their way through the sounds, while I'd already have read pages aheady just to keep myself from melting down in total stupefaction, and I'd be thinking, "Just say it. Just LOOK at the words and SAY them!!!"
@@RCGWho I relate 100%! I'm also a firstborn. Hmm, maybe it's a "firstborn thing"? 😏
Oh, the joy when I suddenly realized that the marks on buildings and signs were WORDS and, as my dad was driving in the city, I looked everywhere and saw words EVERYWHERE for the first time! I was astonished! I had no idea words were on buildings and I was so excited! 😃 Thank you for the reminder. ❤
I was slow to learn to read. Problem is until you reach a certain level of proficiency it is really boring.
I remember the lightning bolt -- it hit while I was looking at the comic pages. A man in a car sinking in water, and suddenly, “Help! Save me!” I was about 5, and that saved my sanity during my public school years. Most of my teachers were willing to look the other way while I read a book in my lap.
Mr. Henderson also proves that irrespective of one's beginnings, if one has the intellect, one should be attended to more to succeed. I barely graduated high school in 1967 but achieved a 45-year career as a software developer traveling worldwide (Born Mo. and retired now in Australia). The story's moral (at least mine): there is no motivation like starvation!
“It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men.” -Frederick Douglass
I bought ur tour tickets for me and my dad im super excited! I love everything that you do and you have been hugely impactful in my life and I’ve been doing better than ever. You kick ass!
The value of the future is implicit with the rituals of the household. ~ J.P.
What I’ve noticed in my own life after two separate rounds in college during the rise of these ‘luxury beliefs’ - the well educated types that would readily claim victimhood status along the lines of some kind of indirect oppressed class identity always displayed the most socially toxic traits. They were usually very vindictive and willing to throw people under the bus to get ahead.
And conversely, the people that had experienced a great deal of direct personal suffering in life to overcome to even get to college were often the most kind, respectful and least likely to claim victimhood status.
Interesting......
Rob Henderson is taking off! The next Thomas Sowell!
Lol, that's pushing it.
See Coleman Hughes
@@bilikfinke9197 Yeah you might be right tbh.
@@OreoKing529 😴😪
That’s a huge compliment
I also craved structure and discipline from my dysfunctional parents, and remember asking my mom to ground me.. looking back it was my internal yearning to know I was cared for, in contrast to the complete chaos I was raised in. Abuse, neglect, alcoholism, violence and suicide… I rebelled and converted to Mormonism to give myself the needed structure and mentorship. I’m not Mormon anymore but can see the benefits in my life at that time.
I did something very similar! At least we knew what was good for us 😂
There is nothing like the voice of relevant experience, especially an educated one.
My mother would leave every aspect of education or passing knowledge to school as if she had nothing to teach me about. Being a child that is not interesting to their parents is awful, it influences entire adult life! It’s painful!
Were you not interesting to her, or did she have such a low opinion of herself that she felt she had nothing to offer as a teacher? I see quite a few people in the latter category, often quite capable people. There are huge numbers of people who feel you can only learn from someone with the official classification of "teacher". It's a weird thing.
same. my dad thought that children were like plants, just provide their most basic survival needs and theyll do well. He never taught us social skills and thought that we would just be taught everything important in life through school. Man did that do a number on our young psyches
You could also end up with parents that when you engage them and ask questions they respond with an honest "I don't know" and eventual frustration. I had plenty of that growing up.
I just finished listening to the audiobook and enjoyed it. I saw you on the Modern Wisdom podcast a few years ago and have been interested in what you have to say since then. Keep moving forward.
I enjoyed watching this interview unfold. I find the parallels between Rob's childhood and that of my own middle-class childhood upbringing interesting. Not that they were in any way similar but more so that we ended up with a similar understanding of how people generally operate (obviously this is an assumption). I don't claim to know much about people but I am truly interested in making them more productive and in turn, I hope that they can feel as though they have contributed to society and their family, the country, and or the planet.
I'm always amazed and inspired listening to stories like this. When someone with a difficult and/or abusive childhood is able to rise above their negative circumstances to levels of achievement, meaning and self-worth that would be difficult for anyone to acquire, I know life is worth living. It's a boon to everyone who is able to hear about it. It certainly helps me immensely.
My favorite podcast out of many, many excellence podcasts
Feels so fitting for the times we live in
Two psychologists / great thinkers having a dialogue
1:36:48 It occurs to me, that if I was actually a Racist, this is the outcome I’d try and devise. The culture of victimhood is necessarily self destructive. It justifies one’s incompetence and failure, as not being the responsibility of the individual to grapple with. When in actuality that isn’t what being a victim actually does. What it does, is increase the urgency and importance of your responsibility to fight for your wellbeing, and to eliminate whatever weakness ended up being the vector.
If you wanted a group to suffer, teach them that it’s not their fault, and they are good just the way they are. Expect nothing from them, and tell them none of it needs addressed by the individual. Then when that leads to poor economic outcomes, you get crime. You get crime, you send fathers and sons to jail. Which has you destabilize families, and rob the young of support. Which leads to stronger regressive cultures of both victimhood and criminality. And so on.
If I was Racist, I would love what that mentality has wrought on whatever minority it might be afflicting. Victimhood is not a virtue. It never has been. Being a victim absolves you of none of your responsibilities, and it never has. If you are actually a victim, you should receive recompense and justice. But even if you actually got that, or in fact did not, it also changes nothing about how responsible you are to acquire competence and virtue. To deal with your situation and master it.
Great story of Hope. Deeply commendable determination Rob , very pleased with your redemptive pursuit to overcome evil with good.
What an inspiring story. God bless!
This guy's life....wow. im going to call my parents more often and tell them I love them. See something like this and really realize how much can be taken for granted. What a strong dude with one hell of an inspirational story.
Yes!
A good friend of mine recently put this in sharp relief for me. One big regret was not actually sitting down and telling his father how grateful he is for everything that man did and sacrificed to provide and raise my friend before he died. that was a moment for me to pause and consider; we have our differences- but i would feel the same.
This is so great! Dr Peterson you inspired me to start writing a blog in French to talk about yours and other interesting thinkers’ ideas. My post this week will be about luxury beliefs 😊
I really respect Mr Jordan thank you Sir
I am crying listening t o Rob, bless
Me and my wife will be at the We Who Wrestle With God Tour when you come to Boston. Can’t wait, you’re brilliant Dr. Peterson!
Wonderful conversation; thank you!
Thanks for sharing. I enjoyed this highly pertinent podcast and appreciate your support and mentorship.
❤❤Thank you both so much. So relevant and well covered.
Thank you gentlemen for this important conversation.
Something that struck me is, when Mr Henderson said, that in potential partners he is interested and attracted by their solid family background. I felt the same about myself and I infered that about my father.
PS I need to have a note pad handy to take notes for the most important things (for me) said in those conversations.
Wishing you all the best Mr Henderson, you are amazing!
This is so interesting. There are different kinds of instability. We were middle/upper middle class, two parents, mom didn’t work…..but I was terrified to be at home. Mom was volatile and unpredictable. She came from abuse and just didn’t know any other way. Dad worked late. I was quiet and sad.
I understand his loneliness in childhood. Proud of him. It took me way too long to understand myself.
Complex trauma!!!
Sounds like we have a lot in common; unstable but athome mother, dadworked lots cos we were 8 kids ( dads1st wife died). I value the stable home i built enormously.
Glad to be here, When all this is still free
I'm Canadian and had no problems ordering one of Jordan Peterson's books. I have also seen his books in many Canadian bookstores. Different viewpoints help us understand better.
Glad to hear this!
He's a joke.
@@SublimeGeminiyou're a child. Clean your room.
One of the most shocking passages in the book described how the foster care system's policy was to move children often to prevent them becoming attached.. Brutality!
Wow…I always wondered why children were moved so frequently.
Higher order discourse. Love this stuff. Very impressed with Rob Henderson.
Went to view additional half hour at the daily wire plus but sadly it is the same video as this one.. Enjoyed this conversation greatly!
It was great seeing you in salt lake the other night. I don’t know if you read the comments but the story of Abraham is far more inspiring than I realized. Thank you!
I agree 😊
"The rich and powerful can afford to experiment with their beliefs and life-choices without immediately perished" - Rob Henderson
4th Industrial Revolution...
I so relate to the struggle of reading in school. I really struggled a lot In school to read and actually do it well. Even though my mother read all the time and I was taught how to read. I knew how to say words, but It was such a chore I avoided it and it was hard to get meaning from it and I genuinely thought I had something wrong with me. It wasn't until grade 11 that I actually started retaining stuff properly and my english teacher assigned a Stephen King book that I actually could finally start to "see the images" in the words. I realized that It wasn't just the content that mattered, it was the physical layout of the books that really made the difference. With everything broken down into sections and short-ish chapters made it a lot easier for me to enjoy the stories. Long blocks of text with no breaks for many pages still make my brain hurt.
What a great interview and what is particularly special is the way Jordan is actually dissecting Robert to a level I don’t think he’s been to … which actually enhances the discussion. Top marks from both in sharing so candidly their talents.
Rob Henderson reminds me a lot about Dave Pezler. Both grew up in the United States; went into foster care; made the hard decisions; joined the Air Force, and rised above their own precarious predictaments. Dave Pezler was more well known in the early 2000s, but I found his books in my mom's basement: the lost boy and a man named Dave.
The 2nd one a very sad sad book :(
@mariannepfly1906 I concord. I recently read his other book: The Privilege of Youth. It's a great book describing his transition from teen to adulthood.
Stunning story.
21:34 begins a fascinating and highly relevant line of thinking that I believe should be addressed en masse by brilliant minds for generations to come.
I have started to listen to the audiobook and I am very impressed. It is great that the author reads himself. I also listend to many interviews with Mr. Henderson these days. It resonates, it is all so very important.
It's quite a relief to see reasonable people being out there. You're great assets👍👍👍!!! And MUST be listened to by many young people.
Learning to read: my youngest son wanted to win at Zelda with his brother 6 years older, so he searched for game FAQs (plain text ascii) and learned to read the walkthroughs. So, the gaming community taught him before his teachers could.
Ah yes, good ol' gamefaqs. I still get nostalgia looking up old guides and seeing the title of the guide done up in giant ascii art.
My reading level was college level in 6th grade. I didn't read books. Games made me read and that gave me a leg up in reading and vocabulary.
It's been 4 years, I'm still listening to you.
Looking sharp, Dr Peterson!
Man, this is so relatable...
Foster care - check
Loved to read when I was younger - check
Entered advanced classes in high school ( Subsequently, I got kicked out of all of them within a week- check
Airforce- check (although my experience didn't play out the same way here).
Then there's my brother - he was accepted to Stanford but discouraged from going. 😞
Again, Dr. Peterson thank you for your outstanding interview and mahalo Rob Henderson for sharing your story. I am awed by Jordan Peterson's erudite analytical push and pull essence of "Troubled,..." author and JBP self. Mahalo Nui Loa Dr. JB Peterson and Rob Henderson.
Our Lady of Gaudeluope, pray for us ❤
in Jesus' Holy Name, Amen.
Praying to the ONE who can actually help not so pagan idol.
@@creativeobx8367 The mother of God isn't a pagan idol
@@creativeobx8367mother of god is not a pagan…🤷🏻♀️
How wonderful to observe intellectual camaraderie in conversation!
Oftentimes, when I watch Peterson’s podcast, I can see very intelligent people trying to keep apace on where they can hook into his (often verbose 😂) commentary/questions. This felt like a conversation between peers, even though the respect Rob has for Jordon is evident.
Wonderful!!
Thank-You for the INSPIRATION & COURAGE to motivate work that will Not be Fashionable.
Whan an informative interview 👍 Rob Henderson is awesome. His books are so useful .I hope it sells millions.
Two of my intellectual heroes.
Great exchange! Thank You!
Thank You Doctor I Finally had a chance to read your book.
My internet dad love you dad thanks for speaking truth in love to my soul and to this lost world
Sorry for the loss of your grandfather. May his life and contributions never be forgotten. Blessings to you at this sad time.
Thank you Jordan
We live a beautiful life in the Ritz-Carlton. How did we do it? Piece of cake. We worked our fingers to the bone diligently and patiently for 50 years.
Like I said, piece of cake.
I love this story. Buying the book! Good find JP!
the implication of the headline is that Yale is something? What does attending Yale have to do with the personal experience of growing up without parents.... "From Foster Care to Air Force Veteran" would signal a much deeper personal accomplishment.
How about from Foster Care to Air force Vet to Graduate of Yale. From What i understand of America, for some reason if you dont have a perfect GPA from a stupidly young age plus money and some kind of victim card you're not getting in. Also, what Headline?
"Eat the rich rather than feed the poor", "Do we raise the ceiling or do we raise the floor". I need that book!!
Looking particularly spifffy in this video Jordan, maybe a haircut or something but whatever it is you look fantastic, the difference from a few years back is incredible it is like you have aged backwards with your recent strives and strides in health. Happy to see it and keep up with it, you are a blessing the world needs, so the healthier and the longer you're around the better!
Checking for tickets now. 😀
Right after high-school I went to the shipyard to learn welding structural on the job. Within 2 years i got my first certification. Ive been thankful but also discouraged at the same time. The conditions are gross honestly but the money and people are worth tolerating. I would find it the exact opposite in a college setting.
Great Man
Very inspirational. Learned a lot from this conversation! Thank you both!
Up them likes and comments. This man is one of the best things about this platform. Let them remember this.
Thank you, Mr. Henderson for spotting and explaining the whole luxury belief phenomenon. I hope that your work in this area will be quickly effective in destroying the evil practice.
The discussion about reading was interesting. My wife used a book Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons. All three children could proficiently read before age three. Kind of annoying when they read cereal boxes while you are trying to get things moving in the morning. They always tested well above grade standards. It served them well. Lessons are only 15 minutes long and were about bonding time as much as reading
Thank you for your work!