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"Mom, it seems like it's better to die at 7 than to risk being sinful at 8." That pretty much sums up the insanity of all dogmatic religions that teach that God is a forever punishing being if you don't live the right way.
At that age you are just starting to separate right from wrong. Even scientifically they have established that. God isn’t all-punishing all of the time either, He is both merciful and justifying/judging for most dogmatic religions. Can’t lump them all with LDS beliefs.
I only came to this horrific realization recently when I learned that I was 'lucky' 😞 that I was sexually abused at the age of 'seven' in the Mormon chapel. as the church teaches that over the age of eight, a child is aware of right and wrong, even if sexually abused and that they therefore the child contributed to it happening. The Mormon church is disgustingly vile to the extreme!!!
@@gaiaheart1 I cannot imagine a more depraved, misogynistic and reprehensible belief system. I am disgusted, but not surprised. I am so sorry for your horrible experience. 😢
@@love2sing20101 what proof do you have of this? I mean if sin sends you to hell for all of eternity and people are starving and babies are getting cancer why do you think God is somehow loving.
Oh my gosh! When I was 19, I met a pair of young men who were Momons on a mission. They asked me a few questions and I told them I was newly on my own away from home and having trouble affording food and I'd had to stop buying meat and fresh vegetables because they were expensive. They never really mentioned religion, just asking about me..then returned later with a huge bage containing 2 whole NY Strip steak dinners with potatoes and green beans. They just handed it to me, told me to enjoy it and said they'd pray for me and left. It meant a lot at the time. I had no idea how little money they were living on! I feel awful they spent what little they had on me! 😮
I know, but genuinely, from the stories I've heard, those are usually the best and fulfilling moments for those missionaries-they got to actually help somebody. I hope those poor boys have made their way out of the church, but kept that generous and caring spirit
I’ve done allot of medieval- early 1900/ costuming /reenactment which often means wearing allot of Linen shifts and undergarments, so the idea of garments didn’t seem weird to me until I found out how much synthetic fibre were used in their construction, like they all seem to be cotton spandex and poly mesh, which would be disgusting in summer, or in most weather really. The reason why linen was used as an undergarments was because it not only breathed but as a bast fibre it is naturally cooling and sweat wicking… but the Mormon garments just seem more synthetic than cotton, which would be awful to wear and would stink after a hot day in the sun.
That's exactly my assumption about garments! I live in Florida, where synthetic fibers are torture chambers 10 months of the year. 😫 Is it possible the dry climate out west is a little better for wearing synthetic fibers? But still...it couldn't possibly be healthy for your skin to NEVER breathe! I mean, does your skin even get to dry off after a shower? 😬
@@evansjessicae exactly! I live in West Australia which is a dry hot climate, and while you don’t have to deal with the humidity as often, I’m afraid wearing synthetics are still pretty unbearable in summer ( 40 degree days are bad in general) But there are a really high number of LDS people in Queensland ( out east our version of Florida… in so many ways 🤣) I honestly don’t know how they survive.
as an exmormon who wore garments for about a year AND someone who has dabbled in historical costuming you are sooo right. The synthetic garments fabrics were so uncomfortable but I loveeee wearing my historical shifts.
i bet the garments in the old days when people could sew and make them out of cotton or something were way less shitty. plus 90% of normal clothing would have covered them up until like the 30s at least so basically all it meant was dudes couldn't go shirtless. nowadays they seem awful lol
Thanks! Very good discussion/game. I’ve got a much longer story; don’t want to cover it all now. I’ll just say that leaving is like suffering through a divorce. I can’t believe my partner [the church]has been lying to me the entire time. I thought we were friends… We’ve been together 60+ years…
Popping in to say I just downloaded and binged Alyssa’s book! What a kind and thoughtful guidebook for folks who have no idea how to approach typical adult situations like alcohol, coffee, and recreational drugs.
I've been cult free for 23 yrs and can still use help on a nuts and bolts level. TV's were a tool of the devil so none of us had them. Now UA-cam keeps me from watching TV
Scary, my ex husband who makes it a point to run around and tell everyone he's Mormon in our court cases (yes, his first few words in his statements were " first of all, I'm Mormon..." ) which I can't make that shit up! He ran around telling everyone I'm a depressed person but any depression I may of had lessened upon divorcing him which is interesting in itself. So funny how they tell you the opposite will happen. I don't miss any of that stuff to be honest.
“I was more righteous than you” a game of who’s better person, this is such a Mormon game I feel Carah you are winning with your outfit, dang Alyssa them shoulders 😉😂
Members have this false sense of righteous superiority just because of some strict rules.. kindness and caring for others is more important than abstaining from coffee or relations.
It's funny how different things are in Germany as a mormon. When nobody has ever heard of mormonism. You're essentially socially isolating yourself for 6 days a week and seminary, church activites and sundays are the only social interaction you have, so most people stay way longer. We went to church at 7am (had to drive for an hour to get there) and stayed until 2pm or something like that. And seminary and yw meeting was just one evening where both would take place. We were just 5 teens 2male, 3female (12-18) in our (is it called ward?) and we lived like 1,5h hours apart each of us in different directions. So there was no way meeting out of church. We were sooooo alone and sooo mormon. I was looking forward to every sunday and yw and seminary meeting, because I had people to talk to there. I would never have missed just one meeting, ever. Going to the temple is very difficult, like driving 8h one way. Even the rules were so much different.
I haven't spoken to my sister for over 20 years. She's Mormon. I'm never-Mo. If I knew her address I would send her Alyssas book. Just in case, you know?
I was so Mormon I got mad at my husband for ordering a Long Island Iced Tea after he had already been drinking all night because I felt like THAT was too far 😂😭
I was raised in a strict conservative Pentecostal Christian household in a very Mormon town, so while I can’t relate to your guys’s experiences 100% I still love these videos! It’s so gratifying to see women breaking out of the misogynistic chains that high demand religions force upon us! You guys rock!
A fellow Pentecostal with no choice in the matter! Conjuring up the gift of tongues on the spot when forced? now that requires quick and creative imagination. Waking up early for family prayer on the knees?
Fellow Conservative Eastern European Pentecostal! We spoke tongues (I got very creative lol), and women were required to cover their heads, no pants, no makeup, and massively oppressed. I am reading Alyssa’s book - although I felt the cult 13 years ago, I never fully processed it, and her book is so helpful! Sending you all support and true healing 🩵
Competitive Culting OMG love this tag! Imagine if Chelise from Cults to Consciousness could have joined up for a Telestial Threesome of light mindedness?😂
in my family on sundays we were not allowed to swim, go to the park, or hike, but walks were encouraged. For years we were only allowed to watch church produced media or wholesome musicals. The Prince of Egypt became my go-to for Sunday viewing. We also could only listen to classical or mo-tab music
I loved this so much! I'm a never Mormon, but I'll be picking up Alyssa's book when it's out in audiobook form. I love people's stories and I love to be a little kinder to myself. Thank you for for your amazing work ❤
That was such fun😁. When I moved to Cape Town, South Africa, I was invited to go to a nudist beach. I fully expected to wear my bikini. I went naked within 30 minutes. It is a wonderful experience. I once met a male colleague there and we were not embarrassed. Hearing about all the restrictions placed on young Mormon girls is disturbing. That church is obsessed with s€xual matters. Are all the leaders secret voyeurs? Bishops asking 8 year old children about their body is disgusting. If my daughter's teachers asked her about anything to do with her intimate body, they would be fired and have their licence removed. Alyssa and Carah, you make a great team.
About the underwear: I now buy female boxers because I cannot stand my thighs touching. I loved wearing my garments. I wore them for like 7.5 years. I almost even bought undershirts/tank tops to simulate the feeling of the garment top.
You two are so delightfully irreverent! I am loving this game format to your shared experiences in righteousness. This episode makes me want to be hanging out with both of you. Love love you guys!
This was completely delightful. Thank you for creating this and sharing your experiences, Carah and Alyssa. Alyssa being so flustered that she had to read the back cover of the book to plug it was hysterical.
It's so ironic, really, in a fiercely misogynistic paternal religion. It was the same in the one I grew up in. The women did everything work related, home related, maintaining religious training.... etc etc
Cheers ladies! Y’all are joyful and smart and healing and happy~such an inspiration! Never Mormon~actually a wild punk rocker~I never knew any of these things about Mormonism and I’m shocked and appalled and feel so sad for so many people who’ve been so deeply damaged by such heavy and systemic shame and fear~y’all are doing a great service to demonstrate a different way to learn and live with authenticity and truth~
Makes sense about the Denver mission. I grew up in the Ken Caryl ward, Columbine stake, and the suburbs are super affluent white boojie, while Denver proper can get kinda rough at times/in certain certain neighborhoods.
I love you guys! And it is so weird to hear you and others talk to Alyssa, because I'm also Alyssa. So I often have weird jump scares that you're talking to me. Though I also was a very devout Mormon wife and mother for almost 12 years (after growing up in the church) I hated the temple and felt awkward, culty and betrayed as it was happening. Felt gross and uncomfortable during the sealing. Got married to my first serious adult boyfriend, essentially the first I felt like could work and liked me because I didn't want to end up an old maid (the singles ward was obviously 3 women to ever 1 man, I knew my chances were already crap from the jump at 18)
omg so mormons not drinking soda IS a thing! I was friends w a mormon girl growing up (as you are when you grow up in arizona) and her family didn't allow soda and I was always so confused bc I wasn't allowed soda very often but it wasn't strict, whereas she would refuse it on practically every occasion. crazy
Thats one of those rules that they're told "use personal judgement" on, so some families are very strict about it. The actual mormon ruling is "no caffene" but a lot of families take it a step further. My family rarely drank soda (only at parties) but we were never allowed caffeine.
Basically, yeah a lot of families have that rule, but more often the closer you get to Mesa, or Salt lake, the more strict mormons you'll meet and the weirder the rules you'll probably see.
@therealz360z7 My parents did the same but I still have soda cravings. I wasn't even allowed soda or sugar drinks at all. but I am hypoglycemic and notice my cravings tend to reflect on an internal sugar difficency at times. I feel like discipline in all things is necessary but not allowing something at all is a net negative for personal growth since experience is necessary for understanding.
ps. my sister was completely isolated from sugar, caffeine, or any stimulant, and now she has severe detriment in being able to process basic sugars and caffeine. sometimes when we protect children from toxins, we unfortunately prevent their bodies from learning to process those toxins, and end up making their lives harder in the long run. We should focus on helping children to cope and function in the world they exist in rather than coddling them away from things we deem scary. I wasnt given the chance to adapt to the real world, and it was a lot hrder to avoid abuse and sutiations where my naivety made things difficult. We need to teach children rather than coddle them. because avoiding "scary or hard" things doenst set anyone up to know how to deal wiht them or be strong. Help people be strong. Thats the best thing you can do.
@@Deadalys Sugar and caffeine are not great for you but they aren't toxins. Heavy metals are toxins. The noxious chemicals found in plants like belladonna are toxins. The particular chemical that Vibrio cholerae bacteria produce, causing cholera, is a toxin.
What I have noticed is that the deeper someone has been in a religion, the more rebellious they are when they bust out. It’s as if they unleash their hidden desires and just break free. They just LIVE. Uninhibited.
I love how rebellious Alyssa is. She says "drinking coffee prevent you from being with your eternal family" and then she drinks coffee like she's running as far as she can from the possibility of being with that suffocating eternal family. Kkkkk It's just a trauma response, but it's a nice one when you don't act self-destructive. It's empowering. We need to reafirmate to ourselves our current position because our brain always takes us back to those feelings of being judged for so long and all other feelings involved. Its a way of reinforce new neurons paths and weaken the previous one that is causing the suffering.
I'm probably responsible for my own algorithm, but I hate that the sponsored ad that played before this for me is Hallow Prayer and Meditation with Jim Caviezel as spokesperson. 😬😭
I think the company must pay to have their videos shown on these types of videos - I get them all the time too, but only on ex-Mormon/ex-Christian content!
@@Ceibhfhionn UA-camrs don't have control of which ads, but they could choose to set up things without ads and promote their own advertisers within their videos. They may not like which things get promoted, but they still welcome the money. They have the option to promote their ideas with other media.
On sundays in my family, we were only allowed to watch "calm" TV shows and were entirely banned from playing video games. We also werent allowed to buy anything, including online shopping
Congratulations for publishing the book. Did you send Rusty a signed copy? If you need a German comment to write into Dieter Uchtorf's copy, hit me up!
Einer der Zwölf Apostel. Er war ursprünglich Lufthansa Pilot und macht während seiner Reden Piloten Witze. Er ist sehr beliebt bei den Mormonen, insbesondere natürlich bei den deutschsprachigen. Seine Konferenzreden synchronisiert er selbst, so dass er auf der Konferenz in Salt Lake City englisch spricht, die Deutschen hören ihn dann aber deutsch reden. Er gilt als einer der liberaleren Apostel.
@@charlesmendeley9823 Thank you for your answer. I am not surprised he's more liberal. I guess in germany he is seen as ultra conservative by most of the population. 🙃 I am convinced that he is a great stage man. You have to be an immense imposter to become Mormon after having passed a pilot education and believe in any of the books of Joseph Smiths fairytales 😳🧐 But on the other hand I often underestimate the power of ignoring and cognitive dissonance in people 😲😉 I myself often think "I will eat healthy from now on" while binging down crisps and chocolate 😁
You ladies are adorable. Im not in the ex-religious club (never got in in the first place) but y'all seem really fun to hang out with. Keep up the good work. The world needs your videos😊
I'm curious about the transition from being "very Mormon" to being, for lack of a better word, "normal". For example, you both talk about sex rather freely, and even have fun talking about it -- which is normal. But you both grew up in a very anti-sex religion, which means you surely grew up associating sex with guilt and shame, probably very deep guilt and shame. How did you break free from that? Speaking for myself, I find it very difficult to just 'give up' shame -- I always feel bad about it, even if my brain tells me I'm doing nothing wrong, maybe even something good. How did you deal with these feelings of guilt and shame? Was it difficult?
This religion has SO MANY red flags but I gotta say convincing small children that death is better than sin has gotta be close to the top on the list of reasons this shxt is insane
I am deeply offended by this video. Not once - NOT EVEN ONCE! - did you offer us a shot! But seriously, beaucoups fun. Thank you for this lighter side offering.
We couldn't drink caffeine Coke or anything like that. Until we were on a plane and Thomas Monson was on the same plane. And he asked for a coke. I was 13 and when they came to me I asked for a coke.
When i was young, my mom had a coworker whose son had terminal brain cancer. I remember going to a Relay for Life to support him. I learned laterwhen he passed that his family was Mormon, and that just before his death, he was able to be baptized. My mom said his family was really glad he was able to do that, but I wonder if he ever thought that he wanted to die before then, so hed stay pure. I remember at the time being so confused as to what happened if he couldnt get baptized, and my mom explaining that his family's religion taught that everyone under 8 would immediately go to heaven. So I just rationalized it as him wanting it to be his choice.
The rule to eat a big salad before watching R rated movies is hilarious. 🤣 This needs to become one of these arbitrary rules which a new prophet (Oaks?) introduces. Just like Nelson banned the word Mormon when he became prophet. Maybe your parents could petition that? Is there a petition box in the celestial room?
1:09:53 I didn’t care for endowment ceremony but assumed it was a sign meant I had to grow more. When I told my mom (she went back in the mimic cutting one’s self days) she said she knew someone who left, stating it felt like the oaths of the ‘gaddiaton robbers’.
My parents wouldn’t let me pierce my ears at all because “my body is a temple” so they said once I was 18 and didn’t need their permission I could pierce my ears. Now that I have left I have many ear piercings. Oops.
When I was able to take shots I always chased it with something. I never thought about chasing shots with pickle juice, but that sounds like it would have been a really good chaser. I love pickles and pickle juice. But taking shots makes me so sick since I’ve gotten older, drinking any alcohol makes me sick even just 1 drink.
1:01:45 I went twice at the MTC (I think), and then my mission didn’t have a temple. Some of the best, most sincere members I had ever met were there and didn’t have the blessings of the temple. I figured the temple was almost a stumbling block for members, look at all the living people we can help, the millennium is for our dead.
Can someone please explain the reference(s) apparently to a movie or movies bleeped out with pictures of corn and cornbread blocking the view of what is being said? I'm usually pretty hep about pop culture, but I must not be aware of the particular reference(s) or movie(s). Just a general description or the name of the movie or movies (to the extent that is what was bleeped out) would be helpful, and I'm not asking for any kind of detailed description or crass explanation which would likely make me sorry that I asked.
That’s interesting that you have thoughts about men looking at you when you wear a bikini. I’ve worn one my whole life and have never thought about a man looking at me. Not even a thought. I’m a never Mormon. I also grew up in a very liberal home so perhaps that’s why? I’ve never thought though about a man looking. My body is just another body on the beach 🤷🏼♀️
When I was 16 and was inactive I didn't care the kind of music that I listened. The when I reactivete to the church I stopped listening any music tha had sexual content. At the mission I never tell my companions "mother" that it is commun at lest in México. I had the change to hang out with non member but I didn't, I dind't wanted to had boyfriend unless we both have the propuse to get married. Of course I confesed every little thing to my bishop. Now I still a member, it's difficult to leave when you have a family and they do a good work making that your entire life go around the church.
Gonna finish tomorrow, but wanted to leave off saying that butterfly kisses are done with your eyelashes, no need to worry about Dad's favorite song 😂 Love y'all!
I have a treasured cookbook called "The Mennonite Community Cookbook"; I always called it my "Mormon" cookbook, because to me, Mennonites and Mormons were all the same shit as Moonies and Hare Krishnas; ie "cults", and I live in Nevada (not Mennonite territory), so I just called it "Mormon" for easy reference... Probably because all my Mormon friends' moms were really good cooks. Seriously, Mormon moms are genius when it comes to snacks and refreshments. My Greek-Orthodox mom made snacks too (mostly olives and cheese), but not like Mrs. Molly Young did.
I love the look too. It''s kantha from India or Bangladesh; you can see the running stitches. Kantha is traditionally used to convert layers of worn-out saris into blankets, hence the different patterns and colors.
So0o mormon I paid thousands- Volunteered hundreds of hours a year, wore the special undies and Paid for my kids to go on missions. My only regrets in this lifetime
You girls are still so wholesome you almost give me a toothache. I love you both! #lapsedbaptist ps vodka needs a mixer unless you are Russian and living in the tundra.
She said in another video the names match to the day of the ceremony so that way if you forget someone can go look it up. So sounds like you had your ceremony on the same day
I grew up in a high demand religion and sooooo many of these apply. Except for the garments and the temple.... And you're both cute slrring 😅 your words after a few shots!!
To aid you in your sins: JWS (just wanna sin) cocktail: in an ice-filled rocks glass combine 1 1/2 oz. Crown Royal whiskey, 1 oz. coffee liqueur (such as Mr. Black), 1 oz. creme de cacao liqueur, and 4 dashes tobacco bitters (such as Bitter Queens Marie Laveau). Stir well to chill. Drizzle with a splash of heavy cream. This is dessert-y. My own creation, and efficient! You break the word of wisdom three different ways. Or four if you're so righteous you eschew chocolate (caffeine! Eek!)
Haha, this is a very funny idea, and it also sounds delicious! Despite never having been Mormon, I am tempted to try it if i can get my hands on the ingredients.
😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 I loved the game, I already want to try too, know my level of worthlessness 😂 😂 😂 I was raised JW and got out of church around 12. I had a lot of time to sin growing up. My righteous score must be negative already.
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Your mics are kinda hard to listen to, very sharp is it a condenser mic? I think a non condenser mic would be less sharp listening on headphones
"Mom, it seems like it's better to die at 7 than to risk being sinful at 8." That pretty much sums up the insanity of all dogmatic religions that teach that God is a forever punishing being if you don't live the right way.
At that age you are just starting to separate right from wrong. Even scientifically they have established that. God isn’t all-punishing all of the time either, He is both merciful and justifying/judging for most dogmatic religions. Can’t lump them all with LDS beliefs.
@@love2sing20101Definitely can be
I only came to this horrific realization recently when I learned that I was 'lucky' 😞 that I was sexually abused at the age of 'seven' in the Mormon chapel. as the church teaches that over the age of eight, a child is aware of right and wrong, even if sexually abused and that they therefore the child contributed to it happening. The Mormon church is disgustingly vile to the extreme!!!
@@gaiaheart1 I cannot imagine a more depraved, misogynistic and reprehensible belief system. I am disgusted, but not surprised. I am so sorry for your horrible experience. 😢
@@love2sing20101 what proof do you have of this? I mean if sin sends you to hell for all of eternity and people are starving and babies are getting cancer why do you think God is somehow loving.
Oh my gosh! When I was 19, I met a pair of young men who were Momons on a mission. They asked me a few questions and I told them I was newly on my own away from home and having trouble affording food and I'd had to stop buying meat and fresh vegetables because they were expensive. They never really mentioned religion, just asking about me..then returned later with a huge bage containing 2 whole NY Strip steak dinners with potatoes and green beans. They just handed it to me, told me to enjoy it and said they'd pray for me and left. It meant a lot at the time. I had no idea how little money they were living on! I feel awful they spent what little they had on me! 😮
Right on! Never turn down food from Mormons; there are so few things they are allowed to take pleasure in, they are invariably EXCELLENT cooks.
That’s a cool story. I think the majority of Mormons are really trying to be very good people.
I know, but genuinely, from the stories I've heard, those are usually the best and fulfilling moments for those missionaries-they got to actually help somebody. I hope those poor boys have made their way out of the church, but kept that generous and caring spirit
@@FIRING_BLIND Couldn’t have said it better. To this very day, those men are probably very glad they were so generous.
I’ve done allot of medieval- early 1900/ costuming /reenactment which often means wearing allot of Linen shifts and undergarments, so the idea of garments didn’t seem weird to me until I found out how much synthetic fibre were used in their construction, like they all seem to be cotton spandex and poly mesh, which would be disgusting in summer, or in most weather really. The reason why linen was used as an undergarments was because it not only breathed but as a bast fibre it is naturally cooling and sweat wicking… but the Mormon garments just seem more synthetic than cotton, which would be awful to wear and would stink after a hot day in the sun.
That's exactly my assumption about garments! I live in Florida, where synthetic fibers are torture chambers 10 months of the year. 😫 Is it possible the dry climate out west is a little better for wearing synthetic fibers? But still...it couldn't possibly be healthy for your skin to NEVER breathe! I mean, does your skin even get to dry off after a shower? 😬
@@evansjessicae exactly! I live in West Australia which is a dry hot climate, and while you don’t have to deal with the humidity as often, I’m afraid wearing synthetics are still pretty unbearable in summer ( 40 degree days are bad in general)
But there are a really high number of LDS people in Queensland ( out east our version of Florida… in so many ways 🤣) I honestly don’t know how they survive.
@@evansjessicaei'm pretty sure they remove garments for washing
as an exmormon who wore garments for about a year AND someone who has dabbled in historical costuming you are sooo right. The synthetic garments fabrics were so uncomfortable but I loveeee wearing my historical shifts.
i bet the garments in the old days when people could sew and make them out of cotton or something were way less shitty. plus 90% of normal clothing would have covered them up until like the 30s at least so basically all it meant was dudes couldn't go shirtless. nowadays they seem awful lol
Thanks! Very good discussion/game. I’ve got a much longer story; don’t want to cover it all now. I’ll just say that leaving is like suffering through a divorce. I can’t believe my partner [the church]has been lying to me the entire time. I thought we were friends… We’ve been together 60+ years…
🥳❤️🙏🏻
That’s a really good analogy. Sometimes it’s even like a death 😢
💯 It's the greatest betrayal I can imagine.
Popping in to say I just downloaded and binged Alyssa’s book! What a kind and thoughtful guidebook for folks who have no idea how to approach typical adult situations like alcohol, coffee, and recreational drugs.
It is a really informative read.
I've been cult free for 23 yrs and can still use help on a nuts and bolts level. TV's were a tool of the devil so none of us had them. Now UA-cam keeps me from watching TV
Scary, my ex husband who makes it a point to run around and tell everyone he's Mormon in our court cases (yes, his first few words in his statements were " first of all, I'm Mormon..." ) which I can't make that shit up! He ran around telling everyone I'm a depressed person but any depression I may of had lessened upon divorcing him which is interesting in itself. So funny how they tell you the opposite will happen. I don't miss any of that stuff to be honest.
“I was more righteous than you” a game of who’s better person, this is such a Mormon game I feel
Carah you are winning with your outfit, dang Alyssa them shoulders 😉😂
yeah those shoulders! in the words of Dallen Oaks she's creating pornography!!!! 😂
Members have this false sense of righteous superiority just because of some strict rules.. kindness and caring for others is more important than abstaining from coffee or relations.
💯
“You’re leaving the Church to sin” no I can fake it and do it here, I just want to live my real truth lol
Ya all the ppl who wanted to break the rules did it the whole time 🤦🏼♂️
It's funny how different things are in Germany as a mormon. When nobody has ever heard of mormonism. You're essentially socially isolating yourself for 6 days a week and seminary, church activites and sundays are the only social interaction you have, so most people stay way longer. We went to church at 7am (had to drive for an hour to get there) and stayed until 2pm or something like that. And seminary and yw meeting was just one evening where both would take place. We were just 5 teens 2male, 3female (12-18) in our (is it called ward?) and we lived like 1,5h hours apart each of us in different directions. So there was no way meeting out of church. We were sooooo alone and sooo mormon. I was looking forward to every sunday and yw and seminary meeting, because I had people to talk to there. I would never have missed just one meeting, ever. Going to the temple is very difficult, like driving 8h one way. Even the rules were so much different.
So interesting. What were the rules like?
I haven't spoken to my sister for over 20 years. She's Mormon. I'm never-Mo. If I knew her address I would send her Alyssas book. Just in case, you know?
I was so Mormon I got mad at my husband for ordering a Long Island Iced Tea after he had already been drinking all night because I felt like THAT was too far 😂😭
What's even funnier about that is that there is no tea in a long island iced tea 😂
Thanks!
Thanks I love you.
I was raised in a strict conservative Pentecostal Christian household in a very Mormon town, so while I can’t relate to your guys’s experiences 100% I still love these videos! It’s so gratifying to see women breaking out of the misogynistic chains that high demand religions force upon us! You guys rock!
A fellow Pentecostal with no choice in the matter! Conjuring up the gift of tongues on the spot when forced? now that requires quick and creative imagination. Waking up early for family prayer on the knees?
Were you in Mary M Cosby’s church from rho slc? 😂
Fellow Conservative Eastern European Pentecostal! We spoke tongues (I got very creative lol), and women were required to cover their heads, no pants, no makeup, and massively oppressed.
I am reading Alyssa’s book - although I felt the cult 13 years ago, I never fully processed it, and her book is so helpful!
Sending you all support and true healing 🩵
Competitive culting?
You wonderful women crack me up.
Competitive Culting OMG love this tag! Imagine if Chelise from Cults to Consciousness could have joined up for a Telestial Threesome of light mindedness?😂
@@DeathValleyDazedphonetically, celestial threesome makes more sense.
in my family on sundays we were not allowed to swim, go to the park, or hike, but walks were encouraged. For years we were only allowed to watch church produced media or wholesome musicals. The Prince of Egypt became my go-to for Sunday viewing. We also could only listen to classical or mo-tab music
I loved this so much! I'm a never Mormon, but I'll be picking up Alyssa's book when it's out in audiobook form. I love people's stories and I love to be a little kinder to myself. Thank you for for your amazing work ❤
That was such fun😁. When I moved to Cape Town, South Africa, I was invited to go to a nudist beach. I fully expected to wear my bikini. I went naked within 30 minutes. It is a wonderful experience. I once met a male colleague there and we were not embarrassed.
Hearing about all the restrictions placed on young Mormon girls is disturbing. That church is obsessed with s€xual matters. Are all the leaders secret voyeurs? Bishops asking 8 year old children about their body is disgusting. If my daughter's teachers asked her about anything to do with her intimate body, they would be fired and have their licence removed.
Alyssa and Carah, you make a great team.
Sandy Bay? Great memories from long ago :)
I COULD BE WEARING GARMENTS RIGHT NOW 💀💀💀🤣🤣 sent me. I’m using that. 🤣
About the underwear: I now buy female boxers because I cannot stand my thighs touching. I loved wearing my garments. I wore them for like 7.5 years. I almost even bought undershirts/tank tops to simulate the feeling of the garment top.
I wear undershirts from September through April 😂
You two are so delightfully irreverent! I am loving this game format to your shared experiences in righteousness. This episode makes me want to be hanging out with both of you. Love love you guys!
This was completely delightful. Thank you for creating this and sharing your experiences, Carah and Alyssa. Alyssa being so flustered that she had to read the back cover of the book to plug it was hysterical.
Thank you. I freaking love that part too hahaha
SAME!!! Thank you for brining up how the women, moms. wives LEAD the families and the pressure!!! Love you both
It's so ironic, really, in a fiercely misogynistic paternal religion. It was the same in the one I grew up in. The women did everything work related, home related, maintaining religious training.... etc etc
This episode was really fun. Great format.
Cheers ladies! Y’all are joyful and smart and healing and happy~such an inspiration! Never Mormon~actually a wild punk rocker~I never knew any of these things about Mormonism and I’m shocked and appalled and feel so sad for so many people who’ve been so deeply damaged by such heavy and systemic shame and fear~y’all are doing a great service to demonstrate a different way to learn and live with authenticity and truth~
No coffee, only clean meats, no dancing, “supervised visitations” with my bf until 16, Mormon upbringing and mine have a lot in common 😂
Great collab! Nice seeing the 2 of you together.
Makes sense about the Denver mission. I grew up in the Ken Caryl ward, Columbine stake, and the suburbs are super affluent white boojie, while Denver proper can get kinda rough at times/in certain certain neighborhoods.
I am watching lol. - Temple satan ❤
I love you guys!
And it is so weird to hear you and others talk to Alyssa, because I'm also Alyssa. So I often have weird jump scares that you're talking to me.
Though I also was a very devout Mormon wife and mother for almost 12 years (after growing up in the church)
I hated the temple and felt awkward, culty and betrayed as it was happening. Felt gross and uncomfortable during the sealing. Got married to my first serious adult boyfriend, essentially the first I felt like could work and liked me because I didn't want to end up an old maid (the singles ward was obviously 3 women to ever 1 man, I knew my chances were already crap from the jump at 18)
omg so mormons not drinking soda IS a thing! I was friends w a mormon girl growing up (as you are when you grow up in arizona) and her family didn't allow soda and I was always so confused bc I wasn't allowed soda very often but it wasn't strict, whereas she would refuse it on practically every occasion. crazy
Thats one of those rules that they're told "use personal judgement" on, so some families are very strict about it. The actual mormon ruling is "no caffene" but a lot of families take it a step further. My family rarely drank soda (only at parties) but we were never allowed caffeine.
Basically, yeah a lot of families have that rule, but more often the closer you get to Mesa, or Salt lake, the more strict mormons you'll meet and the weirder the rules you'll probably see.
@therealz360z7 My parents did the same but I still have soda cravings. I wasn't even allowed soda or sugar drinks at all. but I am hypoglycemic and notice my cravings tend to reflect on an internal sugar difficency at times. I feel like discipline in all things is necessary but not allowing something at all is a net negative for personal growth since experience is necessary for understanding.
ps. my sister was completely isolated from sugar, caffeine, or any stimulant, and now she has severe detriment in being able to process basic sugars and caffeine. sometimes when we protect children from toxins, we unfortunately prevent their bodies from learning to process those toxins, and end up making their lives harder in the long run. We should focus on helping children to cope and function in the world they exist in rather than coddling them away from things we deem scary. I wasnt given the chance to adapt to the real world, and it was a lot hrder to avoid abuse and sutiations where my naivety made things difficult. We need to teach children rather than coddle them. because avoiding "scary or hard" things doenst set anyone up to know how to deal wiht them or be strong. Help people be strong. Thats the best thing you can do.
@@Deadalys Sugar and caffeine are not great for you but they aren't toxins. Heavy metals are toxins. The noxious chemicals found in plants like belladonna are toxins. The particular chemical that Vibrio cholerae bacteria produce, causing cholera, is a toxin.
Question for both of you, when you were tithing, what did you think the church was doing with the money collected? (If you thought about it at all)
We were always told it went towards, helping members who needed financial help
What I have noticed is that the deeper someone has been in a religion, the more rebellious they are when they bust out. It’s as if they unleash their hidden desires and just break free. They just LIVE. Uninhibited.
I love how rebellious Alyssa is.
She says "drinking coffee prevent you from being with your eternal family" and then she drinks coffee like she's running as far as she can from the possibility of being with that suffocating eternal family. Kkkkk
It's just a trauma response, but it's a nice one when you don't act self-destructive. It's empowering. We need to reafirmate to ourselves our current position because our brain always takes us back to those feelings of being judged for so long and all other feelings involved. Its a way of reinforce new neurons paths and weaken the previous one that is causing the suffering.
I'm probably responsible for my own algorithm, but I hate that the sponsored ad that played before this for me is Hallow Prayer and Meditation with Jim Caviezel as spokesperson. 😬😭
I think the company must pay to have their videos shown on these types of videos - I get them all the time too, but only on ex-Mormon/ex-Christian content!
Blame the host. She's welcoming the $$
@@carlosrodas423 UA-camrs don't have any say in what ads show up on their videos.
@@Ceibhfhionn
UA-camrs don't have control of which ads, but they could choose to set up things without ads and promote their own advertisers within their videos. They may not like which things get promoted, but they still welcome the money.
They have the option to promote their ideas with other media.
On sundays in my family, we were only allowed to watch "calm" TV shows and were entirely banned from playing video games. We also werent allowed to buy anything, including online shopping
Congratulations for publishing the book. Did you send Rusty a signed copy? If you need a German comment to write into Dieter Uchtorf's copy, hit me up!
Wer ist denn der Uchtorf?
Einer der Zwölf Apostel. Er war ursprünglich Lufthansa Pilot und macht während seiner Reden Piloten Witze. Er ist sehr beliebt bei den Mormonen, insbesondere natürlich bei den deutschsprachigen. Seine Konferenzreden synchronisiert er selbst, so dass er auf der Konferenz in Salt Lake City englisch spricht, die Deutschen hören ihn dann aber deutsch reden. Er gilt als einer der liberaleren Apostel.
@@charlesmendeley9823
Thank you for your answer.
I am not surprised he's more liberal. I guess in germany he is seen as ultra conservative by most of the population. 🙃
I am convinced that he is a great stage man. You have to be an immense imposter to become Mormon after having passed a pilot education and believe in any of the books of Joseph Smiths fairytales 😳🧐
But on the other hand I often underestimate the power of ignoring and cognitive dissonance in people 😲😉
I myself often think "I will eat healthy from now on" while binging down crisps and chocolate 😁
You ladies are adorable. Im not in the ex-religious club (never got in in the first place) but y'all seem really fun to hang out with. Keep up the good work. The world needs your videos😊
I'm curious about the transition from being "very Mormon" to being, for lack of a better word, "normal". For example, you both talk about sex rather freely, and even have fun talking about it -- which is normal. But you both grew up in a very anti-sex religion, which means you surely grew up associating sex with guilt and shame, probably very deep guilt and shame. How did you break free from that? Speaking for myself, I find it very difficult to just 'give up' shame -- I always feel bad about it, even if my brain tells me I'm doing nothing wrong, maybe even something good. How did you deal with these feelings of guilt and shame? Was it difficult?
I remember having the same thought about turning 8 Alyssa!!! 12:10
This religion has SO MANY red flags but I gotta say convincing small children that death is better than sin has gotta be close to the top on the list of reasons this shxt is insane
I am deeply offended by this video. Not once - NOT EVEN ONCE! - did you offer us a shot!
But seriously, beaucoups fun. Thank you for this lighter side offering.
We couldn't drink caffeine Coke or anything like that. Until we were on a plane and Thomas Monson was on the same plane. And he asked for a coke. I was 13 and when they came to me I asked for a coke.
This is priceless
Hearing you two tell your stories, i realize how rebellious i was as a mormon kid/teenager
I'd only play Have You Ever with other ex-religious people. Normies wouldn't understand 😵💫😇😅
This is great!
I loved this video and I totally reported the one star review on Amazon, after I watched the Mormon Stories interviews 👍🏻
When i was young, my mom had a coworker whose son had terminal brain cancer. I remember going to a Relay for Life to support him. I learned laterwhen he passed that his family was Mormon, and that just before his death, he was able to be baptized. My mom said his family was really glad he was able to do that, but I wonder if he ever thought that he wanted to die before then, so hed stay pure.
I remember at the time being so confused as to what happened if he couldnt get baptized, and my mom explaining that his family's religion taught that everyone under 8 would immediately go to heaven. So I just rationalized it as him wanting it to be his choice.
On a separate note, I love your " hippie" chair. And the colorful curtains.
Thanks! I reupholstered the chair myself! A labor of love I should brag about more.
@@CarahBurrellit’s a really great piece. It really brings the studio to life. Great job.
We all watched an R -Rated movie @ the Bishop’s House, LOL! A rented one for his daughter (my friend’s) 14th birthday party😂
You guys are cracking me up. You need to collab with Mackenzie Vance. I think the three of you would be hilarious and so on point
1:11:18 Same! I don't have "ears to hear" anymore. It feels weird that it sounds like a string of nonsense. 😅
I think you need a bishop present during this game, to ask the questions and keep score.
Just ordered 2 books from Amazon. We got over12 inches of snow yesterday overnight. More snow on the way. #replay
The rule to eat a big salad before watching R rated movies is hilarious. 🤣 This needs to become one of these arbitrary rules which a new prophet (Oaks?) introduces. Just like Nelson banned the word Mormon when he became prophet. Maybe your parents could petition that? Is there a petition box in the celestial room?
you wrote a book on how to leave? Interesting! I just left! I serviced and it was a nightmare from the start.
1:09:53 I didn’t care for endowment ceremony but assumed it was a sign meant I had to grow more. When I told my mom (she went back in the mimic cutting one’s self days) she said she knew someone who left, stating it felt like the oaths of the ‘gaddiaton robbers’.
Got a targeted ad from Book of Mormon Central during this episode 😂
Me too! Laughed all the way through it.
Every time I click on one of these ex-mormon channels I get pro Mormon ads. They have to be buying ad space in hopes of not loosing more people.
Loosing or LOSING? There is a difference.
My parents wouldn’t let me pierce my ears at all because “my body is a temple” so they said once I was 18 and didn’t need their permission I could pierce my ears. Now that I have left I have many ear piercings. Oops.
Mine either. I wa SO mad when my mom pierced hers. (I was in my 30s then)
When I was able to take shots I always chased it with something. I never thought about chasing shots with pickle juice, but that sounds like it would have been a really good chaser.
I love pickles and pickle juice.
But taking shots makes me so sick since I’ve gotten older, drinking any alcohol makes me sick even just 1 drink.
1:01:45 I went twice at the MTC (I think), and then my mission didn’t have a temple. Some of the best, most sincere members I had ever met were there and didn’t have the blessings of the temple. I figured the temple was almost a stumbling block for members, look at all the living people we can help, the millennium is for our dead.
Can someone please explain the reference(s) apparently to a movie or movies bleeped out with pictures of corn and cornbread blocking the view of what is being said? I'm usually pretty hep about pop culture, but I must not be aware of the particular reference(s) or movie(s). Just a general description or the name of the movie or movies (to the extent that is what was bleeped out) would be helpful, and I'm not asking for any kind of detailed description or crass explanation which would likely make me sorry that I asked.
Corn = p**n
Buttered muffin = mastur*****n
You two are so cute. Reminding me of my younger days when I was doing the same thing. Keep it up, life can be so much fun when you’re a sinner. 😁❤
Ladies this is one of the finest videos that I have ever watched
That’s interesting that you have thoughts about men looking at you when you wear a bikini. I’ve worn one my whole life and have never thought about a man looking at me. Not even a thought. I’m a never Mormon. I also grew up in a very liberal home so perhaps that’s why? I’ve never thought though about a man looking. My body is just another body on the beach 🤷🏼♀️
women in the mormon church are told by the highest leaders that their accountable for any struggles men have when looking at them.
Consider yourself lucky
I wish I could feel what that is like!
When I was 16 and was inactive I didn't care the kind of music that I listened. The when I reactivete to the church I stopped listening any music tha had sexual content. At the mission I never tell my companions "mother" that it is commun at lest in México. I had the change to hang out with non member but I didn't, I dind't wanted to had boyfriend unless we both have the propuse to get married. Of course I confesed every little thing to my bishop. Now I still a member, it's difficult to leave when you have a family and they do a good work making that your entire life go around the church.
As always a fun informative visit. Thank you❤️❤️❤️
This was very fun and shows how Mormon teachings affected your daily life. Its in the details, people.
Gonna finish tomorrow, but wanted to leave off saying that butterfly kisses are done with your eyelashes, no need to worry about Dad's favorite song 😂 Love y'all!
I have a treasured cookbook called "The Mennonite Community Cookbook"; I always called it my "Mormon" cookbook, because to me, Mennonites and Mormons were all the same shit as Moonies and Hare Krishnas; ie "cults", and I live in Nevada (not Mennonite territory), so I just called it "Mormon" for easy reference... Probably because all my Mormon friends' moms were really good cooks.
Seriously, Mormon moms are genius when it comes to snacks and refreshments. My Greek-Orthodox mom made snacks too (mostly olives and cheese), but not like Mrs. Molly Young did.
My exhusband and I made a vow not to kiss before marriage. I win! 🤣🤣🤣
AND how was the first kiss?! Was it on your wedding day?
That psychedelic chair fabric! Yes!!!!!!
I love the look too. It''s kantha from India or Bangladesh; you can see the running stitches. Kantha is traditionally used to convert layers of worn-out saris into blankets, hence the different patterns and colors.
So0o mormon I paid thousands- Volunteered hundreds of hours a year, wore the special undies and Paid for my kids to go on missions. My only regrets in this lifetime
I think i would scare off any Mormons who would try to convert me with my witchy ways lol
You girls are still so wholesome you almost give me a toothache. I love you both! #lapsedbaptist ps vodka needs a mixer unless you are Russian and living in the tundra.
Hey Alyssa. My temple name was Adah as well. I wonder how many additional Adahs are running around out there.
She said in another video the names match to the day of the ceremony so that way if you forget someone can go look it up. So sounds like you had your ceremony on the same day
I grew up in a high demand religion and sooooo many of these apply. Except for the garments and the temple....
And you're both cute slrring 😅 your words after a few shots!!
Very fun vibe with the two of you 💕 You should collab more in the future #shots #funny
For any person to ask, "Who was more Mormon" is a bit like asking, "Between the two of use, who was the wackiest?"
I remember staying up at night in the hallway because my dad was watching Kickboxer 2, but I didn't see Friday the 13th until I was over 18.
The title. Holy sh!t...😂😂😂😂
You two are so much fun!!
I think age should be the deciding factor for the temple marriage point. After all, us young women weren't ~required~ to serve missions lol
Guys, this is freakin' AWESOME!
This was brilliant, honesty always the best policy? Soooo funny, thanks ladies ❤
I honestly love you
This was awesome! Loved it!!! 🥰
I wonder if mormon leaders will warn against this book (without mentioning it by name, of course)
probably not. it just falls under anti literature, and will get such a generic label.
"Mormon shot glass" 😆
Holy crap! Matching temple names! Mine is Ada!
I found out that all the men and women received the same name on the same day. My name was Ester.
my bucket list involves spending time with you both ❤
Don't know whether or not you'll see this, but is there any chance that you'd discuss Samuel Bateman and his weird FLDS stuff?
Wasn't actually expecting the Ale8 sticker 😂
To aid you in your sins: JWS (just wanna sin) cocktail: in an ice-filled rocks glass combine 1 1/2 oz. Crown Royal whiskey, 1 oz. coffee liqueur (such as Mr. Black), 1 oz. creme de cacao liqueur, and 4 dashes tobacco bitters (such as Bitter Queens Marie Laveau). Stir well to chill. Drizzle with a splash of heavy cream. This is dessert-y. My own creation, and efficient! You break the word of wisdom three different ways. Or four if you're so righteous you eschew chocolate (caffeine! Eek!)
I am sitting here sipping a frozen JWS, after following the recipe, it is so good
Haha, this is a very funny idea, and it also sounds delicious! Despite never having been Mormon, I am tempted to try it if i can get my hands on the ingredients.
Can I have that recipe for pot brownies?
👏Bravo Carah. Very informative
love Alyssa's Ale8 sticker!
Just got the book. It’s good.
ok carah, how long is the waiting list of guys now?!?❤ and how do I get on the list?😊
You two are hilarious. Glad you are loving life.
Commenting to help.
What if it wasn't a top hat? Did he change hats? Was it ever a bonnet?
😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 I loved the game, I already want to try too, know my level of worthlessness 😂 😂 😂
I was raised JW and got out of church around 12. I had a lot of time to sin growing up. My righteous score must be negative already.
Send the members that give you bad false reviews one your book comfortable underwere. ☺️