Wow! My soon to be ex husband would say these same words. I could never do enough for him. He was a bottomless pit. I can't wait for my divorce to be finalized.
As always you are 100% correct. After 17 years I finally broke free and for the last five years I’ve had a real wife, a true partner who loves and respects me. I know others are still out there struggling, but you can break free of that life sucking force.
It took me 25 years my whole marriage to know he was a covert narcissist! I didn’t realized I was being mentally abuse all those years until the end .. while researching things. I kicked him to the curve when he emotional Discarded me (soft discard) and I divorced him!! He kept pleading with me not to divorce him!! Please …I’m in charge of my life! Happily divorced since August 2024🙏🏽
Healing comes when you self-care. And I found out it's better not talking about or to them or anyone about your past with them. Comments from my family became much more painful for me. They love him! Even my family disregards and hurts me. I lost everything! Became sick with fibromyalgia and other physical disabilities! Only until I worked on self care did I start to find a stronger me! 🙏🏼🙏🏼
You nail it everytime!! Exactly what I’ve dealt with…. And they’re so problematic you can’t even have a basic conversation to try to get him to understand or fix any of the behavior….if i say something like you never say sorry or even feel bad about what you do …. The reply will be “neither do you” then I would t try to explain and he’s say ok shut up and leave me alone then…..such sick lil demons
My father injured 66 years with my narcissistic mother. I saw him change over the decades. My mother is now been dead for two years, and it is obvious that he is still suffering from Stockholm syndrome. He doesn’t really have a relationship with any of his adult children, who are moderately successful, I’ll be at all divorced. Learning from the lessons of a terroristic narcissist.
That is DEFINITELY my Father with my Mother. She will take all kinds of abuse from him but acts like the victim when dealing with her kids. It's sad when you put that Dictator first before her kids, including abusing her kids mentally or verbally.
Yes! I was a full-time live in maid and cook (as well as caregiver/mother for an “adult” - but at least children can be taught how to do things eventually) with absolutely no benefits. After I declared that if we were going to continue to live as roommates, then roommates do their own laundry, cooking, and cleaning up after themselves, he lost his sh*t and totally discarded me. Good riddance is all I can say, because I tried to escape multiple times over the years. I should’ve paid attention to the big red flag 🚩 he threw at me in the beginning when he said he always does better when he’s in a relationship and living with someone. I’d be happy to have a servant too!
I was expected to come home on weekends while in college and clean my Mom’s house despite my Dad and Brother living in the house. I stopped that BS immediately!
Yup. My ex-bff, the narc, became engaged to a man she used to hate, when she found out he owned a lot of property in FL. She had him working day & night to fix up their home and install a pool & big deck. When he was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer, her list grew longer as she wanted everything done before he died. She went to chemo with him once. She found it too boring. She hardly ever visited him in the hospital. He died alone in the bedroom while she entertained friends in the dining room. She waited 2 hours till the party was over before calling his hospice nurse. A real POS.
In other words, you are expected to be their mother. But they definitely treat you as their sevant. Please and thank you is not a part of their vocabulary. When I finally had enough of his shit, I did NOTHING for him anymore. Not his laundry, absolutely nothing. I even started cooking for one, moi'. Ooooo that pissed him off. Every day I went into the kitchen and carefully prepared good meals, clanging pots and pans, closing cabinets, opening and closing the refrigerator, only to cook enough for just me. I'd prepare a place at the table, just for me. And I'd sit down at the table, set my plate down, and eat my lovely meal, ALONE! And due to the open floor plan of our home, he saw everything. One day during one of his blow-ups he said "you don't even cook for me anymore!" I said "because I'm done!"
Mmm sounds like my dad! We've gotten into many arguments/disputes/fights when i got TIRED of feeling like his servant and refused to cater whilst he sat on his Fat AZZ!
When I was in college I was expected to come home every weekend and clean my narcissistic Mother’s home. My Dad and brother lived there but did nothing. I refused to do that! My Mom lost her mind.😳🤪
Yes! And servant and an object. After a while the narc I knew used spirituality as a reason to not to thank me bc what I did was from God. Thats right, years of no verbal appreciation. It wasn’t until they got a new supply they started to start thanking me for stuff. I thought it was funny. Perhaps they forgot to take their mask back off.
That ant right . Its a team effort. Dont neather one of them own each other . That want last so marry someone cause you truly want to be a team ans love each other and billed a bound that no one can brake but you to . Thats how i feel .
I am a little confused on this one. My wife does everything and i mean everything, cooking, cleaning, takes care of the bills etc and then she complains that i never help her, so when i say hey let me cook something other than grill she says no, if i say well let me help you with household chores and she will get mad and say no. Anytime i try and help with her complaints the answer is no or we get into an argument. It almost seems like a control issue and when i offer to help then she feels like she has to say no because she will not be in control? Am i seeing this correctly?
Yes, my boyfriends mom is like this. She actually enjoys cleaning, so there childhood home was spotless, but she was always complaining about doing everything herself, and the second someone volunteers it’s like nope nope I got it!!!! You just sit down. Mind you she has lupus, her hands are contorted into like balls permanently she’s very disabled, but her only control is the house and food and money, then bitching about how much she doesn’t for everyone.
And, you’ll NEVER clean/cook to her expectations. She’ll clean up after you clean. She’ll find fault. It’s a form of control. Lives her life in resentment and anger.
I cannot stop listening to this video again & again cos I feel so dame frustrated & sorry for this MF’s ex who has to not only work her ass off but also has to look after her 3 children !!! On her own or not it really doesn’t matter cos no matter what, she has no choice but to go forward being the leader for her precious children !!! Period !!! To whoever I’m sending this msg to … I’m so so proud of U !!! Ur finally free now !!! LIBERATION !!! 👊❤️👊
To use, abuse, exploited; smear until there is nothing left to wipe away. Esp if you are aged. Just walk away. Leave.
Was married to a narc for 13 weeks.
Jill's words are right on target.
Financial abuse too
After all my sacrifices, hearing (with a snarl), "You don't do anything for me" was definitely a confirmatory sign to get out of my toxic marriage.
@@sylviemulvaney Oh mine have told me “You Don’t Deserve Anything.”
Wow! My soon to be ex husband would say these same words. I could never do enough for him. He was a bottomless pit. I can't wait for my divorce to be finalized.
As always you are 100% correct. After 17 years I finally broke free and for the last five years I’ve had a real wife, a true partner who loves and respects me. I know others are still out there struggling, but you can break free of that life sucking force.
I m suffering right now
@ I’m sorry. Just know it’s not hopeless, even though it feels that way most of the time.
It took me 25 years my whole marriage to know he was a covert narcissist! I didn’t realized I was being mentally abuse all those years until the end .. while researching things. I kicked him to the curve when he emotional
Discarded me (soft discard) and I divorced him!! He kept pleading with me not to divorce him!! Please …I’m in charge of my life!
Happily divorced since August 2024🙏🏽
It took me 28.. it's probably would of longer but he got caught up in his lies.I WOKE UP
@@Lig2023so glad you woke up!! Concentrate on healing. It takes time you will get there!🙏🏽
🎉 yay!
Healing comes when you self-care. And I found out it's better not talking about or to them or anyone about your past with them. Comments from my family became much more painful for me. They love him! Even my family disregards and hurts me. I lost everything! Became sick with fibromyalgia and other physical disabilities! Only until I worked on self care did I start to find a stronger me! 🙏🏼🙏🏼
@@cristinalz9395good to hear you are taking care of yourself. We owe it to ourselves. I refused to be stuck. 💪🏾
You nailed it!!!
You nail it everytime!! Exactly what I’ve dealt with…. And they’re so problematic you can’t even have a basic conversation to try to get him to understand or fix any of the behavior….if i say something like you never say sorry or even feel bad about what you do …. The reply will be “neither do you” then I would t try to explain and he’s say ok shut up and leave me alone then…..such sick lil demons
I'm experiencing this too.
Thank you my dear soul ,you speak the truth I'm not.
Facts! They sorry as hell.
My father injured 66 years with my narcissistic mother. I saw him change over the decades. My mother is now been dead for two years, and it is obvious that he is still suffering from Stockholm syndrome. He doesn’t really have a relationship with any of his adult children, who are moderately successful, I’ll be at all divorced. Learning from the lessons of a terroristic narcissist.
I learned my lesson. Stealing from me
28years of slave duty!!! My friend has given 53 years of slave duty!
Thanks again Jill. You're a life changer. !
That is DEFINITELY my Father with my Mother. She will take all kinds of abuse from him but acts like the victim when dealing with her kids. It's sad when you put that Dictator first before her kids, including abusing her kids mentally or verbally.
Painfully true, Ma'am!
Indeed...
Yes! I was a full-time live in maid and cook (as well as caregiver/mother for an “adult” - but at least children can be taught how to do things eventually) with absolutely no benefits. After I declared that if we were going to continue to live as roommates, then roommates do their own laundry, cooking, and cleaning up after themselves, he lost his sh*t and totally discarded me. Good riddance is all I can say, because I tried to escape multiple times over the years. I should’ve paid attention to the big red flag 🚩 he threw at me in the beginning when he said he always does better when he’s in a relationship and living with someone. I’d be happy to have a servant too!
Exactly what I experienced. My mom also demanded and lost her mind when I went to college and moved out instead of being her maid and cook for life.
Thank God, u realized that mother can abuse in such a way. In our country mother is treated like God even if she use u as servent.
Mmm 💯 sounding like my dad right bout Now! 😡 Piss me off the amount of WORK I've put in! I'm grateful for all i have! However
I was expected to come home on weekends while in college and clean my Mom’s house despite my Dad and Brother living in the house. I stopped that BS immediately!
Thanks you Thanks you for sharing this amen
You just described my life with my wife and her mother
You sure right
🎉🎉🎉🎉 that's true it takes two to tango to make sure that a couple that makes it but the narc one side only
So true.
Facts. 💯👍
So ture 💯 correct
Very true
💯✨ You're absolutely nothing to them!
Yup!!!
Spot on
Gratitude is a great virtue of Truthful wisdom knowledgeable person.
That is just another example of why they are weird and creepy.
Yup. My ex-bff, the narc, became engaged to a man she used to hate, when she found out he owned a lot of property in FL. She had him working day & night to fix up their home and install a pool & big deck. When he was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer, her list grew longer as she wanted everything done before he died. She went to chemo with him once. She found it too boring. She hardly ever visited him in the hospital. He died alone in the bedroom while she entertained friends in the dining room. She waited 2 hours till the party was over before calling his hospice nurse. A real POS.
Hopefully the poor guy wakes up in time to get the marriage anulled.
Most men have always been like this. Young girls don't know what they are getting into.
Yes, I totally agree. It's a sick trap that you don't know you're in until you're neck deep
Personal servant…
In other words, you are expected to be their mother. But they definitely treat you as their sevant. Please and thank you is not a part of their vocabulary. When I finally had enough of his shit, I did NOTHING for him anymore. Not his laundry, absolutely nothing. I even started cooking for one, moi'. Ooooo that pissed him off. Every day I went into the kitchen and carefully prepared good meals, clanging pots and pans, closing cabinets, opening and closing the refrigerator, only to cook enough for just me. I'd prepare a place at the table, just for me. And I'd sit down at the table, set my plate down, and eat my lovely meal, ALONE! And due to the open floor plan of our home, he saw everything. One day during one of his blow-ups he said "you don't even cook for me anymore!" I said "because I'm done!"
Mmm sounds like my dad! We've gotten into many arguments/disputes/fights when i got TIRED of feeling like his servant and refused to cater whilst he sat on his Fat AZZ!
I like your style 😜
When I was in college I was expected to come home every weekend and clean my narcissistic Mother’s home. My Dad and brother lived there but did nothing. I refused to do that! My Mom lost her mind.😳🤪
Amen
They are also expected to cater to their FLYING MONKEYS!!!!
Yes! And servant and an object. After a while the narc I knew used spirituality as a reason to not to thank me bc what I did was from God. Thats right, years of no verbal appreciation. It wasn’t until they got a new supply they started to start thanking me for stuff. I thought it was funny. Perhaps they forgot to take their mask back off.
❤
I give my (former) narc credit. The guy she married is more than happy to be her personal support system. Ciest la vie!
A human punching bag too
That ant right . Its a team effort. Dont neather one of them own each other . That want last so marry someone cause you truly want to be a team ans love each other and billed a bound that no one can brake but you to . Thats how i feel .
DITTOS on steroids times 100000000 to the tenth power amen and amen and amen and amen and amen and amen and amen
So what happens when you have two full-blown narcissists get together in a relationship?
To exploit
I am a little confused on this one. My wife does everything and i mean everything, cooking, cleaning, takes care of the bills etc and then she complains that i never help her, so when i say hey let me cook something other than grill she says no, if i say well let me help you with household chores and she will get mad and say no. Anytime i try and help with her complaints the answer is no or we get into an argument. It almost seems like a control issue and when i offer to help then she feels like she has to say no because she will not be in control? Am i seeing this correctly?
Yes, my boyfriends mom is like this. She actually enjoys cleaning, so there childhood home was spotless, but she was always complaining about doing everything herself, and the second someone volunteers it’s like nope nope I got it!!!! You just sit down. Mind you she has lupus, her hands are contorted into like balls permanently she’s very disabled, but her only control is the house and food and money, then bitching about how much she doesn’t for everyone.
I think she sees this as her only control in life, she’s lost control of everything else. So when you are under her roof, game over.
And, you’ll NEVER clean/cook to her expectations. She’ll clean up after you clean. She’ll find fault. It’s a form of control. Lives her life in resentment
and anger.
I cannot stop listening to this video again & again cos I feel so dame frustrated & sorry for this MF’s ex who has to not only work her ass off but also has to look after her 3 children !!! On her own or not it really doesn’t matter cos no matter what, she has no choice but to go forward being the leader for her precious children !!! Period !!!
To whoever I’m sending this msg to … I’m so so proud of U !!! Ur finally free now !!!
LIBERATION !!!
👊❤️👊
How EVIL!!!!!!!!!!!
Amen